that. >> that's off limits. not doing it. nice to work with you. >> pleasure, thank you so much arthel. >> already, have a good evening , everybody. >> goodnight, everybody. >> greg: hello. and welcome to our special july fourth weekend show it's brand new, but was pre-taped a week ago. >> [laughter] >> which means tonight whatever topic i choose to discuss, it has to be interesting and fun, but also generic and non-topical so it doesn't get old in a week, so how about those stupid democrats? >> [laughter] >> see? that never gets old. it never gets old. definitely not mailing it in tonight, ha? all of these democrats they want

to be president and they're trying desperately to stand out while trying to appear human. they drink beer just like you and me. >> hold on a sec. i'm going to get me, um, a beer. my husband bruce is now in here. do you want a beer? >> i'll pass on the beer for now. >> greg: i will never drink beer again. >> [laughter] >> and they also go to the you and me. like >> oh, so i'm here at the dentist, and we're going to continue our series on the people, i'm here with diana, and diana is going to tell us a little bit about growing up. >> greg: they watch porn with their mom just like you and me. >> i promised that we would go to the movie theatre and see

this new movie. it's an x movie. i just, you know? i was sure she wouldn't say no. i made a mistake. so i took my mother to see deep throat. >> [laughter] >> greg: what voting block ws he trying to win over with that story? the crazy pervert who goes to porns withy his mom? it's a huge block. >> [laughter] >> greg: great story though so when you got 20 candidates in the mix at some point it starts to feel like everyone trying to outdo themselves for the left wing fringe onet twitter. f trump didn't do any of that as a candidate. he stood at the podium, got the crowd fired up and no one bulldozed past him to get to the condiments. >> i don't think he should back away from the bullseye view. >> i'm sorry i'm just going to disagree. >> [laughter]

>> greg: you didn't see trump doing this. >> got all excited this morning , we're talking about how many days are left in the school year. we're cutting out some of this ear hair that you get when you get older. it grows out of your ears and you don't get it cut, it can be nasty. >> greg: yeah, the day we see how trump's hair is done it'll be $100 pay-per-view event and i would watch the hell out of it. >> [laughter] >> greg: i don't need to see b eto's ear hair. i don't even need to see beto, much less his ear hair but trump didn't need to do that. he packed a stadium and had a strong rally. president trump: we will make america great again. thank you. thank you very much. thank you. >> [applause] president trump: we will make america great, great again.

thank you, thank you very much. we will make america great again >> greg: now that was the slogan, but what does the other side have? >> i will be bold without the bold. >> greg: silence. of all of the candidates in this race i think i'm going to miss him the most and of course there'se joe. >> my name is joe biden. i'm running in this case runnini for president of the united states, look me over, if you like what you see help out and if not vote for the other person >> i think they are going to vote h for the other person. i don't know what's worse that joe is so tired or that he was still the front runner after that but do you know who doesn't sound tired? president trump: do you know who got me elected? i got me elected. >> [applause] >> greg: right now, that's

what this election is coming down to. this is trump. >> [screaming and yelling] >> greg: and this is any one of the democrats. i need to get that back. the fact is trump has made it hard to judge anyone just on politics. it's probably the greatest unintentional benefit of his presidency. sure we got a great economy and low unemployment but we're see ing something else happening, a challenge to the stereotypes, the platitudes, the cliches, the old guard feels so tired and lame, which is why i know who trump is going to face in 2020.

>> mr. president, if you're listening, i want you to hear me , please. you have harnessed fear for political purposes and only law can cast that out, so i, sir, i have ao feeling you know what you're doing. i'm going to harness love for political purposes. i will meet you on that field and sir, love will win. >> greg: yes! let's welcome tonight's guest. >> [applause] >> greg: he's so bland, he makes pat boone seem dangerous. >> [laughter] >> greg: host of the quiz show on fox nation. >> [applause] >> greg: he performs his service if he's super nervous, comedian joe mackey. >> [applause] >> greg: she's sassy but keeps it classy, katherine timpf. and he finished a marathon in

just 12 steps. my sidekick and host of nuf said on fox nation. >> [applause] >> greg: what's your assessment in this race so far? >> what do you mean you're going to miss swalwell? he's not out of it greg. he's going strong. i like swalwell i want trump to use my slogan, what would you rather have, a swell wall or a swalwell? >> [applause] >> i said that on this show, greg and went to this big fox nation event. people had buttons that had my slogan on it. >> greg: that's what happened, it's one of the few things you'll be remembered for. it could be the only thing you'll be remembered for, because you are forgettable. >> awwwwwww.

>> greg: [laughter] >> greg: joe? i'm kidding tom, barely. joe? what's your take so far on the democratic candidate.e which one scares you the least? >> i'll tell you what, andrew y ang scares me the least becausew he's going to give me $1,000 for nothing and that sounds good. it's the only candidate that gives me money to pay for all of the tax increases that i'll have to pay for everything, for everybody else. >> [applause] >> greg: kat? >> yes, greg. >> greg: what are your thoughts? >> my thoughts? >> greg: yes. put them in order of importance. >> i mean, if i could have anything in the world, i would have mary ann williamson be the democratic nominee. >> greg: me too. >> because i have friends like her, right? and i see them about once every

six months so it's a little bit harder to talk through your problems, talk about your problems with someone who just says well just rub crystals on your knee, and they will go away , or you know, well that's because the moon is in [bleep] and when it is in retrograde, then scorpio moon, libra and that's what it sounds like to me i don't really know, but people believe this and they have a certain kind of face and talking when they do. she's like love, she can't just say like love is not as sexy. >> greg: she's soothing. it's like when you hear her i feel like i'm bathing in a tub of warm milk and i know that feeling because i often do that when i'm a home. >> that's the least appealing thing that i think i've ever heard. >> greg: but i've got more.

[laughter] t >> so you want to talk about the democrats or stay weird in the bathroom? >> yo greg: let's talk about te democrats. >> i'm surprised, the bathroom is a little more fun. i haven't, there's been some moments. i just, i keep looking at former vice president mr. joe biden and go why are you doing this to yourself? nobody likes you. like i feel, and at the same time, it's also a big moment for me because i never in my lifetime thought people would gang up and tell white people they're not allowed. like this is great. like we've come a long way and went too far like back up and let everybody be cool so i just can't watch more than a few minutes of it because every time corey booker talks it's like just say what you want to say but he has to be the guy that everybody likes. he's everybody's friend which to me means he's nobody's friend, so people like that, you just can't trust. >> [applause] >> greg: nope.

i believe that the ticket is and i'm predicting it now, is going to be two women, because i think that like the strongest candidates are kamala harris and liz. it's just which one is going to be -- >> is it weird that i'm not inspired by that? i'm a woman but i'd prefer to like keep my money, you know? >> greg: yeah, yeah. >> [applause] >> greg: coming up we answer your mail and then throw tom shi llue out of a window. >> [applause] -and...that's your basic three-point turn. -[ scoffs ] if you say so. ♪ -i'm sorry? -what teach here isn't telling you is that snapshot rewards safe drivers with discounts on car insurance. -what? ♪ -or maybe he didn't know. ♪ [ chuckles ] i'm done with this class. -you're not even enrolled in this class.

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>> greg: it's time for viewer mail a highly ridge that segment that happens on holiday shows. here iss just a handful of the hundreds you submitted on facebook and twitter and as always these are directed to everyone including myself, peggy sue writes, and you don't hear much about peggy sue any more, if you could go back in time to visit a younger version of yourself, what advice would you give and what age would you visit? tyrus? >> 18. i'd be quick kid, vasectomy.

>> greg: vasectomy, [laughter] , kat? >> just all the teens, and i would tell myself that maybe if you didn't sit in the classroom writing song lyrics on your notebook about how nobody likes you, more people might like you. >> greg: awww. >> right now, guys. >> greg: joe? >> well it's a tough one, greg. i'm doing super, so it's hard to admit i've done anything wrong but i'd probably go back to 17 and tell my younger self take out a whole bunch of loans for college because in the future a whole bunch of people are going to whine about how they didn't pick the right major and it's someone else's fault and we'll get it for free then. >> [applause] >> greg: that's true. that's soo true. tom? >> t if i could talk to my younger self, i guess i would say tommy get some of that hot l

ovin. >> greg: really? >> yeah. >> i'm so disturbed by this answer. to be clear just because it's y you saying it. >> he's saying it to himself. >> and you call yourself tommy? >> does anyone else not get the fact that he went back in time? >> [applause] >> can i change my answer? >> greg: yes. >> go back and get some more of that hot lovin. >> [applause] >> greg: if i went back in time i'd go back to when i was in eighth grade and don't believe the priest when he said "that'll make you go blind." >> [applause] >> greg: the weird thing is though i am kind of legally blind. maybe he was right. anyway, next question is from jerry. she writes so she asks what's your favorite movie, song, and

book, but for time, just pick one. what's your favorite movie, song , or book? i think that i know what kat will say. what's your favorite whatever? >> my favorite movie, anybody know? come on. you don't't know? well, then you don't know me at all. >> greg: [laughter] >> my favorite book i'll go with that. >> [indiscernible]. greg: oh, somebody reads. a real honest to god book. but my favorite movie is happy g ilmore. tom? >> maybe animal fun, changed my life. and made me realize animas are a bunch of dirty communists. >> [applause] >> greg: joe? >> lord of the rings for favorite book and movie. should have got that hot lovin.

>> [applause] >> tyrus? >> i have to be honest with you i'm a little freaked out right now but he said animal farm so now i'm like ill, so i have to go where the red fern grows because that was my favorite book. >> [applause] >> greg: where did the fern grow by the way? >> see, don't ruin it. stop and move on. >> greg: i didn't like any books that you were forced to read when you were young. like i didn't like what's that to kill a mockingbird. i didn't like that book. >> because they forced you to read it. >> greg: every book they forced me to read -- >> you're an english major greg you'll have to read some books. >> greg: i like the fall. i also like the bible. ofke unspeakable truth by greg gutfeld. you can get it in paperback by the way. oh, i'm shame less. next question comes from faith an. he tweeted to us, who are the crew that act in ya' ll skit,

because they seem to make the show so first of all it takes longer to write y' all, than it is just you all. so enough of that stupid crap. i'll answer this. it's everybody that you see the skit works on the show because we're cheap. tom we don't pay you. >> th no i'm just in the buildig all the time. i've got nothing to do. >> [applause] >> greg: every skit, he's on a drug. anybody else want to answer that question or cares? >> i mean, this show, is this not the best comedy show? >> [applause] >> greg: okay, if you look at any other show, they've got a staff of like 100 people. we have eight people. >> [laughter] >> greg: that's including the

people onow the couch. >> [laughter] >> greg: i mean, it's nuts. >> and i'm part-time. >> [laughter] yeah, you don't see me on the commercials that's on a wednesday and tyrus don't work on wednesdays. >> greg: enough blowing our own horn, on our facebook page, they want to know, what was everyone's first real job? okay, mackey, i have a feeling it was an interesting job. >> i worked at a fine dining restaurant, where people were confused by why i was there. >> greg: [laughter] >> yeah. there's just something about me that doesn't say fine dining. >> greg: kat, i have a feeling you had an interesting experience? >> no. it wasn't interesting. i worked at a pizza and grinder shop and i was maybe the only

person who worked there that had never been to prison so i didn't really fit in. >> i have a question? >> yes? >> grinding means a lot of things now days, so pizza and what was the grinder part? >> i had a shirt that i had to wear that said "gotta grab a grinder." >> [laughter] >> but it was a sandwich. >> greg: tom, first job? >> i worked in a nursing and retirement home and i lied to get into the job. you were able to lie back then. they said are you 16 and i said yeah, but i was 15. >> greg: [laughter] that gets me into a lot of trouble. my first job, i can't figure out which one was my first real job because they were like i had a paper route, is that a first real job? >> yeah. >> i used to take two sticks and pute them together and put them together like crosses and go door-to-door and try to sell them. that doesn't count as a job. >> greg: that seems like a

sick thing that a child would do >> you're not entirely wrong. >> greg: no that's weird selling sticks to strangers. i had a paper route. i would never sell grit. i didn't even know what grit was the ad for grit. people in their 70s are going i know what they're talking about. all right, just shut up. >> [laughter] >> greg: up next the first annual greg gutfeld summer movie trivia quiz. >> [applause] gutfeld summer movie trivia quiz. [cheering] wow! that's ensure max protein, with high protein and 1 gram sugar. it's a sit-up, banana! bend at the waist! i'm tryin'! keep it up. you'll get there. whoa-hoa-hoa!

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>> live from america's news headquarters i'm jon scott. the u.s. women's soccer team wins the fifa world cup defeating the netherlands by a score of 2-0 today's victory marks the second consecutive time the women's team had the trophy. the stars both scored for the victory and the team will be honored with a parade in new york city wednesday morning 9:3. and the regime in iran says it is increasing its uranium enrichment today beyond the limit allowed by a 2015 nuclear deal with the world powers an agreement president trump withdrew from a year ago and officials are saying they are going above the agreed cap " based on our needs" and the move prompted swift international condemnation from leaders of the uk, germany and

israel. i'm jon scott see you at the top of the hour for the fox report. now back to the greg gutfeld show. >> greg: time for the summer movie trivia quiz. otherwise known as filler for a holiday show. here is how we play. i asked multiple choice questions, you holdup paddles, marked a, b, c, or d to answer and the winner gets a copy of my book, the greg gutfeld monologue s, which is now a paper back. >> [applause] >> greg: we can't afford prices. keep your own score. here we go. all right first question. which movie is considered to be the first summer blockbuster film earning $100 million in theaters is it a, king kong, b, raiders of the lost ark, c, godz illa, d, jaws. oh, we got three right.

it was jaws. >> [applause] >> greg: one for kat, one for joe, one for tom, tyrus left out >> i'm not playing greg. i'm putting the same letter up every time. >> greg: no you're not doing it. >> i'm not playing. >> greg: why not. >> you didn't ask me my job. >> greg: what was your first job. no, you can't go back now. no. >> greg: question two. the hustle, stars ann hathaway is a remake of what film? a, the sting, b, dirty route en scoundrel, c, the color of money , d, lethal weapon. >> oh, who cares. >> greg: you guys have to play tyrus is right, kat is right and tom is right. joe you're wrong. it was b. let's see.

question three. >> maybe i'm psychic. >> greg: best known for playing luke skywalker what movie did he lend his voice to this summer. is it a, b, c, or d. oh! tyrus, kat and joe, they're all alike. >> [applause] >> greg: kat is leading with three, you'll win a copy of my book. >> oh, thank god! >> greg: which heartthrob played "goose" in top gun? a, b, c, d. >> [laughter] >> greg: the answer is oh, tyrus and tom. anthony edwards, no doubt. >> [applause]

>> what's the score? >> greg: it's tom, kat, and tyrus are tied up. >> i've never seen a single one of these movies. >> greg: question 5, samuel jackson stars in the 2019 shaft. who sang the original shaft theme? was it a, b, c, or d? oh, we've got another three right, tyrus is right, joe is right, tom's right, kat you're wrong. now tyrus and tom are ahead. boy this is just a load of -- >> where are all of the questions about happy gilmore. >> greg: question six. what chevy chase summer comedy was the biggest of 1985? a, b, c, or d. oh! it's b, european vacation that

means joe and tom get it right. tom is in the lead now with five >> i do host the quiz show, greg. >> greg: you're quite good at this. >> [applause] >> greg: how many questions are we doing. question 7.is will smith plays the genie in a aladdin. was it a, b, c, or d. the answer, oh, they all got it right was b! >> [applause] >> greg: last question, we need a tie breaker here, kids. i'm not bad, i'm just drawn that way, is a line from a, batman, b , terminator, c, all in with chris heyes, or d, who framed fger rabbit. who has this one? they all got it right which means the winner is tom shilloue

>> [applause] >> tom gets a copy of my book, in which i will sign it. tom, i love you. >> [laughter] >> greg: greg gutfeld. >> it's that hot lovin i was talking about. >> greg: coming up our favorite fake movie trailers. >> [applause] ♪ ♪ ♪ [music] my experience with usaa has been excellent. they really appreciate the military family and it really shows. with all that usaa offers why go with anybody else? we know their rates are good, we know that they're

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>> greg: let's look at the bits that made your side split. first up is what we made for denver, colorado after the city moves to decriminalize magic mushrooms. >> there's never been a better time to visit home of the broncos.

>> [applause] >> ♪ ♪ >> skiing, avalanche. >> rocky mountains. >> skiing. >> [laughter] >> denver, take a trip. >> [laughter] >> greg: that was we were trying to capture what it would be like if you were completely high on imagine in mushrooms and trying to do an ad. i think we caught it, right? you guys seem excited. this next one is a product that we imagine for the home. a room to hide from constant news media outrage. we called it the outrage bunker. >> in an era of volatile political storms, controversy can erupt at any moment without

warning. >> the media was quick to call the students racist. >> when outrage stretches will stu have the facility to keep your family sane? >> oh, my god. we have to get it before it's too late. >> why, what's going on? >> there's no time. get the kids. >> come on, kids let's go. >> go! >> we got to get in here. quick, quick! >> open the door. dad, dad, mom, it's your son. >> you have to open the door, quick! >> it's too late. if we open that door now we get sucked into the outrage vortex. >> you will drag us down. >> we can just hang out in the outreach bunker.

>> you're the best. >> the outrage bunker will find generalizations, story developments and all other hot air that comes with sensational ized breaking news stories and with the outrage bunker you and your loved ones will be healthy and you can enjoy life when the dust settles as if that talk of the town never really happens. >> well we made it. >> really? >> really. >> [laughter] >> holy mother of god. >> what the? >> get to the outrage bunker today. warning it may provoke social media withdrawals, and an increase in overall happiness. >> yes! >> greg: excellent acting. tom and our own gene nelson as

the zombie and by the way again these are all people who work on our staff, have office jobs, could you imagine like hannity staff doing this? or tucker staff? no. >> they can barely catch that football he throws. >> greg: it's true. advertisers always use sex appeal to get people to buy their product so we thought what would it look like if trump tried that with his border wall? we got this. >> ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ [music] >> hey there, are you looking for the hottest border security this side of the rio grande? do you love long, beautiful, flat, raw, naked steel and sexye barriers that are see through in all the right places? then you'll love the all new southern border wall. perfect for stopping the illegal flow of narcotics criminals and mike rail entitlement migratory because it can't be penetrated

and the south koreans wall and fenway park too. >> greg: i would totally bang thatba wall. >> in the great wall of china? >> no. >> and the great barrier ref says -- >> i haven't been this turned on since i had the three way with those tiger sharks. >> so call now because one way or another these bricks are getting laid tonight. >> [laughter] >> [applause] >> greg: all right the narrator for that, that ad, was our producer, holly, who i think tyrus can never look at the same way again now. [laughter] this last one is a scene we made from a new james bond film that caters to the milkshake throwing activists in the uk. enjoy. >> where are you?

>> you can't get away with this >> oh, but i already have. by the time you track me down it will be too late. [laughter] oh, james you're so predictable. all i have to do is push this button and the building will be level. >> there's only one thing that can stop a madman like you. >> wait! >> [applause] >> greg: before we go to break

, that was one take. >> one take. >> one take one shake. >> [laughter] >> i think that we should just end on that, right? any other parting thoughts? no? >> i'm good. >> greg: okay. just checking it out. that was all acting. up next, breakdancing may become an olympic event which means i'm about to win a gold medal. >> [applause] big building. next, breakdancing may become an olympic event which means i'm about to win a gold metal. when crabe stronger...strong, with new nicorette coated ice mint.

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>> greg: would the olympics be shocking if they added popping and locking? the international olympicna committee, has approved adding breakdancing to the 2024 games in paris. that's a city in france, joe. >> [laughter] >> greg: each dance battle will have 16 athletes competing in both the mens and women's event. paris is also looking to add skateboarding, sport timing, and surfing to their summer program but the ioc has to grant final approval before the new sports can be added so personally i'mor

still hoping this becomes an olympic event. i hear the russian judges gave her a 5.2. a little russian judge humor there. joe, you seem like a breakdancer >> i am, greg and i'm pretty darn good at it. i'd demonstrate but i can't. but it's no wonder the olympics have bankrupted more cities than public unions, because we're going through sports from other decades that no one really pays attention to, why not add the rollerblading? >> greg: see, no one cares that's the thing. honestly. kat what are your thoughts on this breakdancing thing? >> i think it's good. i think it's good, because whenever i see anyone break dancing iea look at them and i think that looks hard.

so i think that that should be in the olympics. it looks harder than some of the other stuff already in the olympics. >> greg: i agree like the thing with the ribbons? >> well like curling. i actually don't know what curl ingwh is tyrus. >> it's cool. >> i actually feel like the fact that i've made it 30 years on this earth without ever need ing to know tells me all i already need to know about curl ing. >> it used to be a national pasttime. >> that needs to be, i can inhale -- >> greg: just by the vape cloud. i would win. >> greg: of course you would and that would be crazy to have it in san francisco where it's banned.gr tyrus what are your thoughts on this? it feels like it's arbitrary it's like why is baseball a sport? >> i'm not going to get inside with you, baseball is a great american pastime, communist. >> [laughter] >> but here is the thing. e e olympics it's dying and

they're trying to inject it with stuff to keep the old horse going but at some point you've got to take boxer to the blue factory. breakdancing is an artform, so i'm good with it. bad mit on not so much but the olympics is trying to keep people going, so the summer olympics like track and field but countries as they progress and get better they have their own sports now and the best athletes don't necessarily train for the olympics so it's an old pastime but it's fading away so eventually at some point it'll be video games, it'll be face timing, speedid texting, it'll e things like that. >> greg: you could be judged on how well you disguise your flaws. they do a selfie and if you can see how much better they are without actually knowing that they did anything, what am i talking about? >> no you're on to something. it's 100%. >> speed texting, because like

with the least errors so if you have like five people there and isyou have like a passage from they have to and speed text it to their friend. >> i would win. >> greg: would you win? >> 1,000 percent. >> greg: see it's right up your allie. >> and here i thought i was not an athlete. >> greg: you know, tom i bet you might have had break dancing in your t background. i was a bit of a foot looser too >> greg: oh, really? >> yeah, the art of foot losing yeah, letting those feet loose. but -- >> greg: did you dismember people? >> no, i never did that. >> greg: oh, okay. >> but, i thought about it. no, i used to hate the sports that had the judges, i like things that have finite rules to them that if you run the fastest you get the gold medal and i didn't think anything that had judges should be in the olympics

because it really shows you there's no such thing because the judges from russia always give the russian person the highest and it shows you that there's no objectivity in the world. >> th greg: this is why as i've said before all judges whether hein sports or in real life have to be robots or artificial intelligence or what do you call those, whatey are those little things? >> [laughter] >> you're going to have to be more specific. >> algorithms. >> greg: yes because judges when they're deciding whether you go to jail it depends whether they have lunch. there's research on how much you ate effects whether you get like pardoned or early release and it's so, i mean think about that you've got to have, same thing with the olympics. >> if you ever get arrested and go into court, bring a sandwich. >> [laughter] >> greg: so true. we learn a lot from you tom. all right, don't forget to buy

your tickets for the gutfeld monologues live, the next three shows july 20, asburr it park, new jersey september 14 in orlando, september 15 atlanta , special guest some jerk named tom shillue. >> [applause] >> greg: stay right there. i have a very special final thought to close out tonight's show. >> [applause] go to ggutfeld.com. stay right there i have a final thought to close out ♪ limu emu & doug

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>> greg we've got two. >> thanks, greg i want a quick shout out to my friends where they make boxes of games and toy s for kids fighting in the hospital. it's the jaredbox.com if you'd like to get involved. >> greg: nicely done, all

right so i have a final thought. we arela saying goodbye to a vey important member of the staff. come here, awww. i know she's going to cry. don't cry. our studio audience coordinator, if you've ever been to a live show which i think about 20,000 people have at this point, it's because nora puts you there whenever you sent e-mails that we're yelling about something she was the one that had to read it and be nice to you. she's the one that always deals with cranky people who have to p ee, and she worked with us back in the red eye days and been a big part of this show's success and we're going to miss you. give nora a hand, everyone. >> [applause] >> greg: all right special thanks to my guest and studio audience and nora. i'm greg gutfeld, i love you,

america. gutfeld. i love you america. [applause] >> jon: president trump is back at the white house right now after spending his weekend at his golf club in new jersey. the president spoke to reporters on a wide range of topics before taking off from jersey. more on that in just a moment, but first? >> u.s. wins the fourth world cup. >> [applause] >> jon. the stars and stripes reign supreme again as the u.s. women's team defeats the netherlands good evening i'm jon scott you're watching the fox report. the u.s. women's team getting