he's a good guy. reporter: the funeral home said someone got in contactth them saying she was the daughter and she was okay with the funeral going forward. president trump: we are going to mars. we are stopping at the moon. the moon is the launching pad. [laughter] will be doing the moon but really we will do mars. [laughter] >> i can see it now, mars. [laughter] all right, another banner week for the media. if by banner you mean stupid.

every major. [laughter] i don't like those. i don't know about you but i'm not into flies or mosquitoes. but who is, really? i don't like snakes too much. >> i don't like snakes too much. they are a different variety. >> there almost as bad as children. >> i know a guy can't stand his children. horrible human beings. they are a little older now but they are horrible human beings. they would say, why would they leave, they don't even like you? >> makes me think about why mc. >> the song ymca. >> why not everyone loves that song? >> republicans love it and

democrats love it and labors and unions love it. >> i could be why everyone is looking so much better these days. >> you look all much better than you did three years ago. [laughter] even when the need to movement began. better looking. [cheering] excluding cement. including the men. >> not like those phony democrats. >> how about the phony democrat? they started with russia, prussia, russia. then they went to race. then recession, there's going to be recession. please let there be a recession. [laughter] >> these are phony people but that's okay. >> these are phony people but that's okay. when you think of it, i'm president and they are not. [laughter] [cheering]

>> thank you very much, president trump. >> thank you very much, president trump. >> that was an experiment to show you [bleep] is funny on its own. i don't even have to write a damn joke anymore. i just picked the vexed parts and repeat it. [laughter] which is great. it's less work for me. they are getting more desperate every day. things are pretty good but they need people to believe it's pretty bad. so they frantically try to reanimate the cap story. new york times ran an excerpt from a book the incident of sexual abuse documented. that was on every show and network. i don't once, revealed that they left out a key fact. the victim had no recollection

of the incident. weird how that got past the editors. details like that, you would think it would matter. they obliterated that detail that was how they maintained their business model which appeals to the people that they do. they commit a crime leaving out the part about their not being a victim. imagine that. that's a pretty big admission. that's like writing a book about great americans and forgetting about me. [laughter] thank you very much. that wasn't the only mistake. one day they are pushing false stats, leading to trump rallies. then another day there running stories about terms feelings and scotland. that was an actual story. there's other crab about family turmoil.

no wonder they tried to smear the kavanaugh. they deliberately warped the truth. i wonder if trump agrees this one of the worst weeks in the history of the fake news media. >> i think this is one of the worst weeks in the history of the fake news media. the media of our country is left out all over the world now. your joke. [laughter] >> it's getting harder and harder each day to figure out what's real and what isn't. out there in media land. if only there was a product for that. >> it's happening everywhere. in parks, and offices and in homes all across america. this is awful, every time i read the time, i realize it's wrong or they leave out facts.

i have to waste time rereading the corrections. ridiculous. it's exhausting. >> sounds like you could use some corrections nonsense. >> i'm going for anything. >> there enhancement that prevents your eyes from seeing all the inaccuracies. they remove everything except the truth. the result -- get only the facts. >> this is incredible. it is september 19. i see the word the -- thc. does it do anything else? >> obscene on programming's tonight. [laughter] the best invention ever. thank you. >> get your corrections nonsense today.

>> makes up for the fact that my wife won't talk to me. [laughter] >> g.i. joe and popeye how to love child. it would be retired sergeant kerry. [cheering] she's always stunning and knows a lot about money. [cheering] small in stature. [cheering] one day he accidentally tripped up guam. >> what you make of the media

performances? >> trump has made you immediately lazy. you don't have to write anything. i wish you would put more effort but you don't have to. >> it's obvious i didn't do the work this week. i had jury duty, i was sitting there and then i was reading trump's words and they go thank you. >> don't lose the eye of the tiger. the classes, my favorite movie, it never gets old. the media, the problem is the media continues to fight on this. they are creating it. they've been busted. i don't think they can recover from this. they just don't stop. >> i think the media created a

permanent dated public. you no longer buy their bs. these are only analogies. >> at the big hoops that they forgot. wasn't even interviewed and she said she doesn't even recall it. they are attacking judge kavanaugh. so they made the retraction and correction. three presidential candidates immediately, senator warren, beto o'rourke medially called for kavanaugh's resignation. there's a problem with that. it's wrong. [applause] >> nobody get punished. they just move on until they

find the next crisis, the ukrainian phone call. >> they issued a correction. [laughter] corrections can be very useful for things like bob was 41, he's really 42. or like we said sarah was from san diego. she's really from san jose. or the woman who was allegedly assaulted does not remember. same joke. i would like to change the new york times for something related. i have the receipt here. maybe if you were working harder, you would have touched on it. >> i was at jury duty. >> this is the tweet that new york times tweeted out to promote this story. it said, having it in your face

at a drunken dorm party may seemed like harmless fun but -- excuse me? [laughter] they took it down but i want to know who, everyone thinks it's fun, who? [laughter] [cheering] >> they deleted no one get punished. >> i'm sorry but someone might invite that person to a party. i do not want that at my business party. [laughter] close out this segment with your wisdom. >> it's the way the world has turned on white men. [laughter] i can't enjoy this? [laughter] arrested for crimes we didn't commit.

you assaulted someone even though there's no one. i feel bad, how does it feel? [laughter] your laughing because old white men no. i sleep with two eyes open. now they wonder what they did. [laughter] progress. >> did they not just make up a crime? so keep in your pants. >> they issued a correction. they should have a separate issue called the correction. before we go, we've added a new show in cleveland on september 7. we are headed to jacksonville and knoxville. go online for ticket info. how weak are the democratic

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2020 candidates. >> he may be first but he can't do math. joe biden's gotta tax credit

plan he wants you to know about. it goes something like this -- >> why couldn't we provide $8000 tax credit for everybody who has childcare costs? >> i can get a tax credit for a rain forest? [laughter] tell me, joe, how many women wouldn't go back to the workforce? >> 720 million women back in the workforce. >> 720 million women, that's amazing. out of a total u.s. population of 320 million men and women. he's going to put 720 million back to work, that would be impressive. and impossible. speaking of numbers, the latest poll from a place called fox news shows that 26% thinks

crimes will be reelected. back then, we didn't know. who knew the race would look like this? >> i think more. >> in fairness, i do that, too. they're taking wagers on who will be the nominee. more bets on hillary than any other candidate. or i'll talk 20 to one. for biden, gazillions. it's not surprising 38% there will be someone new. who has it to win? not him. he dropped out.

how did trump take it? >> too bad, he had tremendous potential. >> height. those the only advantage. i'll never be president. >> you can wear heels. >> i do wear heels. find me at the park, walking my imaginary dog. thank you. there is nothing wrong with it. what's your take this week? any thoughts? >> as someone who talks about the economy a lot, i'd start with joe biden. 720 million workers back into the workers that are women, i'm trying to think, how would you get there? the unemployment rates already, i'm thinking maybe since democrat, most are in favor of open borders, men and women from

overseas. that's how you get to the 720 million. [cheering] >> maybe, i don't get the bad thing -- >> i just feel really bad for joe biden at this time. the statistics that stuck out to meet the most was that 36% of the people who support joe biden are among those who are hoping someone else enters the race. that's like finding out the present you are dating still has a tender account. that's a hard thing to face. he's thinking all these people think he's mr. right and they think he's mr. all right for now. supporters are still going out on dates with other people. >> that's every relationship in

your 20s. >> also not just mine? >> especially new york city. >> it wasn't me. >> it wasn't you at all. >> national treasure, if you will. >> a needle in the haystack. [laughter] the entire field right now like a lousy episode. just aging, platitudes. maybe. >> you got cheated on a lot? [laughter] >> a fair amount. yes. >> they are all unemployed. >> i don't know how the rest of the panel can look themselves in the mirror. i get it, joe biden is old. worse than that, he's old and white. i get it. they are the bad guys. watch them, they are everywhere.

his little buddy, bernie. as bad, he start out great. his team must, he's doing great. we're talking about jobs. you should get a tax rate with to turn. a smoke bomb and dance team to come out, but as bad as he is, he's whipping the rest of you all so bad, how -- if i was competing for a job and it was a dance contest and he falls every time, during his dance number and they are still picking hi him -- >> yes, that says something.

[laughter] >> it was obvious, obama said he's the bestie could have had. he's either lying or hiding something. the numbers could possibly work out if all lazy women in the country got to jobs. [laughter] >> you were all faking it. >> the unemployment rate -- >> i do have two jobs leap [bleep] [laughter] >> so you are stealing jobs from another woman out there. [laughter] >> 120 million don't have one.

>> the wealthiest politician on the planet. that's next. ♪ the amount of student loan debt i have i'm embarrassed to even say i felt like i was going to spend my whole adult life paying this off thanks to sofi, i can see the light at the end of the tunnel as of 12pm today, i am debt free ♪ not owing anyone anything is the best feeling in the world, i cannot stop smiling about it ♪

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texas speak at a welcome rally for india's prime minister. tuesday's u.n. gathering comes amid growing tensions between the u.s. and iran. president trump says he has no intention of meeting with rouhani but adds nothing is off the table. the pentagon announced more plans to send more troops to the middle east. washington plans iran for the attack on saudi arabia's oil plant. ♪ >> is there any going back? after painting your face black? you've seen pictures of justin trudeau wearing a brown face, a new phase, also in high school

singing the banana boat song in blackface. a third instance of black base sometime in the 90s. all coming a month before an election. i wonder if he is sorry. >> i'm really sorry, this is something i deeply regret. i didn't see that from the layers of privilege i have. for that, i am deeply sorry. >> deeply? sounds sincere. no one in his party is calling for his resignation. the media only for the because about this stuff when a non- liberal poses kind of crab. it raises one question, why is it the wealthiest guy in the room who has the most to hide? could there be a connection there? meanwhile, one question the media kept exiting. >> how many times? is a just the three or other more? you know people are looking for them. [laughter]

>> is three not enough? asking if there are more incidences than just the three seems to imply there's an acceptable amount. three well, okay but there better not before. anyway, he didn't say whether there were more but he did say this in french. >> i'm very sorry for what i have done. i'm not sorry every saturday night at 10:00 p.m. i watched the fox news channel. [laughter] >> all is forgiven. [laughter] [applause] lay on the truth. >> ridge privileged, famous parents. liberal progressive. >> you are so afraid. let me tell you what i think.

i don't care. it was 20 years ago. the first day he was elected, he came out and brown face. he said to get anyone like this out. that's racist. i myself did some racist things about ten years ago, 15 years ago when i got pulled over by police, i would turn my hat around forward and say, good evening, i didn't know i was driving thought barr. i pretended to have a white voice. my buddy got pulled over, he was white. he said, i didn't know i was going to do that. he said you've got to teach me that, bro. i use that. i'm sorry, america. i pretended to have a white voice inside of me. but the boycotts begins now.

>> the only explanation as to why he did it three times is because he didn't know he was racist. if he didn't know, he's just stupid. >> i want to offer a take on this. i know it's my job but i just feel intimidated because i don't think i can offer as impressive overtake as john did. he said multiple times, isn't it nice to see a leader apologize? clearly taking a dig at president trump. i just don't understand, the fact he was able to take a story about justin trudeau wearing brown face and turn it into an opportunity to talk smack about president trump, that's like a

kind of gymnastics we have. that's impressive. this story about the prime minister wearing round face and his reaction is, i can't believe that trump guy. >> it's not really the offensi offensive. i guarantee you if that would have been a republican who did that, i guarantee you it wouldn't be back. fifteen minutes of silence. >> justin trudeau is so insufferable. you are a number that woman, he corrected her, don't say mankind, people kind. then you've got blackface. >> he's got problems. the media would be more outraged if a republican or conservative debt. that's like saying trump has an orange face.

[laughter] he admitted it, he has an orange face. >> definitely. if i was a republican, blood would be drawn. knives would be out. it's a complete double standard. i appreciate everything tyra said, whether or not it seemed racist or is now or was 20 years ago -- the liberals have made that rule. even trudeau said that wearing black base, putting dark makeup on his racist but did it not one time but many times. we don't know how many times. we don't know how he sleeps at night. [laughter] >> it's about hypocrisy, everybody here will forgive. we forgive but i don't think anyone there on the other side would ever forgive you or cat --

[laughter] >> the thing is, you're right, the phrase in the military, that's your parachute. write it like it's on you. they created the rules. i don't care if you make fun of me, i don't care. [laughter] >> this has to go away because we aren't very forgiving but -- >> they wouldn't forgive us for anything. one word, they would be marching on.

it's always the locust guy in the world room who has the most. coming up, climate change to pick up school. can't say i blame him. (burke) at farmers insurance, we know a thing or two because we've seen a thing or two. even a- (ernie) lost rubber duckie? (burke) you mean this one? (ernie) rubber duckie! (cookie) what about a broken cookie jar? (burke) again, cookie? (cookie) yeah. me bad. (grover) yoooooow! oh! what about monsters having accidents? i am okay by the way! (burke) depends. did you cause the accident, grover? (grover) cause an accident? maybe... (bert) how do you know all this stuff? (burke) just comes with experience. (all muppets) yup. ♪ we are farmers. ♪ bum-pa-dum, bum-bum-bum-bum

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limited arm movement, fatigue, headache, muscle pain, joint pain, less appetite, vomiting, fever, chills, and rash. ask about prevention. ask your doctor or pharmacist about prevnar 13®. allowed to skip school. public schools allow students to participate in global climate strike marches during school hours without penalty. 1.1 million kids were exempt from class or is biden might say, 12. [laughter] any kid that wants to skip out of the protest needs parental consent. any kid who doesn't get permission has to stay in school

so they can be locked up while resenting fair responsible parent. protests were planned nationwide but not all school district are excusing the absences. parents would rather they instill the values. one of them said i'm all for people supporting the causes they believe in but do not force your causes and beliefs on my first grader. [cheering] >> i remember skipping school looked like this. ♪ i have no idea what i was protesting. but i was beautiful. what are your thoughts? >> first of all, i want to say i love the planet. i might even be biased toward the planet. i've lived here my whole life.

>> yes, you have. literally. >> i don't know where i would move but at the same time, i think kids should be allowed to be excused for activism. my "issue is" that that's not what the school is doing. they were saying you are excused to go protest for a cause you are passionate about, they are think we are passionate about this one so you're free to go marching in the streets for us. these kids are not like free workers for your. they are children. don't pick and choose like that. they're not going to be allowed to go, that would have been me. i wouldn't have a career if i missed first grade. [laughter] everybody would have made fun of me and they were already making fun of me for my she mullet, i don't think i could have handled it. >> i'm thinking of a she mullet now.

>> that was my intention. >> they painted scarlet letter on those -- >> and kids with mullets. >> i think activists know. pressure works in their favor and they don't care. >> exactly, it's gone too far. >> reducing the impacts of whatever -- >> you live here, too. >> i'm so happy, my daughter goes to a public school in a different state. i would be infuriated and outraged, a mother mailed a letter homes to the parents say don't come to school or come to school but everybody is going to be gone because we will be at the protest. do it on a weekend. >> this is a free be. activists know kids are great political weapons. they are easy to bribe.

if you criticize the kids, they accuse you of punching down. you're punching up because they are being used as political tools. [cheering] >> here's the thing, this is the small kid stuff. when kavanaugh would get hammered, he went to harvard. harvard law students, you pay a lot of money to go to harvard. they walked out of class because he's a rapist. you are a lawyer. this is how indoctrinated they are. you have law students, probably the most prestigious place, they walked out because he's a rapist.

>> are you crazy, i would love to piggyback off that. you took us there. here's my issue with climate control. it's a global problem. it's unattainable for us to face what other countries do. >> what happens, when i was a kid, it was tangible. our school had arbor day, here's a free tree, your helping the environment. we all took our little trees and we were so smart and planting them, i'm not going to vandalize trees. so we got away with weird

interviews and stuff because it was bad. it was recycle, this one and that and americans got behind it. it was an obtainable goal. if all these things, you take the kids who went through the day, they come back to school tomorrow, what did you learn? it's about a political statement. [applause] >> up next, we bought brought a con for support. when i book at hilton.com i get to select my room from the floor plan... free wi-fi... ...and the price match guarantee. so with hilton there is no catch. yeah the only catch is i'm never leaving. no i'm serious, i live here now. book at hilton.com and get the hilton price match guarantee. and i don't add trup the years.s. but what i do count on... is boost® delicious boost® high protein nutritional drink has 20 grams of protein,

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when your job is going down, send in the clowns. from new zealand, they have them there. joshua jack. recently called into a work meeting and feared the worst. he was getting fired. he'll be hired and emotional support cloud. they are legally allowed to bring a support person to help cushion the blow. he did get fired. having the clown made it not so bad. to jack, it was sort of noisy

and making balloon animals. so he did have to tell him to be quiet from time to time. the ground cost $200. or as joe biden said -- girl, girl. i'm going to milk that joke the whole year. jack already landed another job. the clown got another job as a piano player. ♪ ♪ >> all right, heather. why isn't this shocking? is in this direction of the world? >> animal, dog, some are seeing ostriches, different types of animals. >> i was at a meeting years ago when somebody's brother parents

to a job review. >> he probably got fired anyway. >> and your $200 out of pocket. there's a huge workplace destruction. balloon animals were causing so much noise in the office, they had to tell the clown to turn it down a bit but the fact that the workplace, they allow you to bring in a clown. that's pretty cool. >> what you think of this? >> you know, people are great. we are not signing anything or coming in. mind coming in next thursday? i'm not coming. [laughter] i know what's about to happen. you can tell me what you need to tell me now. i'm not flying into get fired.

how do you not get promoted? >> true. >> he literally brought a clown and. instead of firing me, watch this clown. this could work with cars. come down and watch me make balloon animals. >> it was genius. >> this guy is legend. >> i have some of my buddies from the military, it's helped a lot. everybody ruins it. >> right. people abuse it. >> people on a plane with the support dog. they can be very emotionally supportive. >> they walk out with a support wall. that would be weird.

>> i did that once. you had to bring up. >> you have done this to me all the time. hurt me in front of people. i'm getting you back. that's it. >> i only talk about your set. you must be in a relationship. >> yes. >> he stole your wife, i saw your job. [laughter] >> it's true, i've been using words like fancy pants. letting your hair grow out. >> i'm shattering expectations. let me get cap in here. we veered off. >> i would like to say, i respect this.

do not understand it. no offense to clowns or the guy using clowns, brian, if you're watching this, don't -- >> you literally dated a bunch of clouds. >> no, clown college. brian, not about you. i've never been in any situation and thought, you know what would make this better? a clown. [laughter] if i'm getting fired, i don't want to be dancing around with balloon animals, i want somebody with a worse situation than me. give me the chick who just got served divorce papers and it's like her sixth one and she's only 25 and her house just burned down and her safe was full of money in there. give me '. >> i didn't expect this turn. ♪

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greg: thank you, terry, kat timpf, tyrus. and our studio audience. i love you america. jon: we are awaiting remarks from president trump after a week rocked by accusations, oil supply attack and tough talk on the international front. the president making its way to new york for the united nations general assembly. president trump arriving in ohio a short time ago where he will tour an australian-owned paper mill recycling plant with the prime minister. he was in texas earlier speaking at a welcome rally for india's prime minister. he