advocating for the american way, greg gutfeld is coming up next. i will see you next saturday ♪ ♪ if you are shopping for me i take an extra medium. [cheering]. greg: this week began with the hero dog chasing the hideous leader of isis down a tunnel to his own death or a cnn might put it, german shepherds, how is

llama phobic are they. a hero dog helped capture the terrorist trapping him in a whole who killed himself in his own kids or as newsweek might describe it, dog without leash harms family on he weekend hike. you probably cannot find a better and for a madman rapist or as washington post calls him an obscure religious scholar. like this monster was a thoughtful bookworm who spent many days putting a fluffy kat lettinlistening to james taylor. they got caught. it's no surprise they media hates trout more than they hate isis in spite of them. >> not because of the president but in spite of him perhaps in spite of the president. >> despite the president. >> largely in spite of. >> largely in spite of.

>> and not because of. >> and not because of donald trump. >> in spite of his actions. >> if it were up to you bin laden would still be banging goats and the kush mountains. [laughter] greg: but even the hero dog drive him nuts. wednesday after the president tweeted a fake image of him placing the metal honor, the fearless media broken action to prove this was fate. because that's obvious to anyone who has not fallen out of the building and landed on the head. reporter tweeted i have requested details on this photo. there was no such canine event on today's schedule. [laughter] greg: nailed it, i think you cracked the case wide open. the regular hardy boy. then the new york times solely

added, this photo was indeed altered. nicely done times, is this one altar two. [laughter] greg: how about this one. [laughter] greg: or this one. greg: fun fact they are all real. [laughter] greg: and then there was this tweeted from jim acosta, a white house official said the dog is not at the white house. but wait, were you there jim? [laughter] they were vastly coming, townsquare fools once again media switchgear saying the image it was disrespectful to the person who was photoshop. but james mcluhan laughed and said trump was noting the dogs heroism. of course james never would've seen him in general if the

reporters had not run to him, anyway we salute the dog. but i'm sure -- [applause] greg: clap for the damn dog. it's not that great but i'm sure there's someone over a buzzfeed combing through the old tweets looking for ancient post-that might cause serious embarrassment, weight my producers tell me lusardi happen. damaging tweets by the dog have been heard and we have a few here. here's the first one. lassie could help my leg anyti anytime. garfield should be made into a hat. stupid, fat dumb kat die already. what is the other one, spoiler alert, old yeller get rabies and

they shoot her, good riddance lol. [laughter] no one should lol about rabies. by the way cnn those were all made up. [laughter] is still the media has become the mean of police tracking on the jokes that are obvious to all of us but them. too bad they can't be bothered with actual stories whether the true or the steel dossier or the political bias of a whistleblower, right adam? >> and now adam schiff gets a haircut. >> what are we thinking. >> may be like this. >> in mourning, is not a problem. you heard grows faster than you don't think. i can make it grow. [laughter] see? greg: i smell emmy.

america coincides with good news about trump which cannot be good for them with each achievement their sense of humor deteriorates. it's not like they had one to begin with. right adam? >> now adam schiff interviews. >> i think the resume speaks for itself. >> it does you have 0 experience. [laughter] you are hired. >> awesome. and cute. too much confidence makes me nervous. you're fired. >> i don't understand. >> no one does excuse me i'm watching television. [laughter] greg: maybe the media needs arrest, every time something good happens they feel pretty bad. maybe trump should not be so

effective just to give the media break. you think killing the head of isis would purely be american response that they can enjoy but a world where everything is tainted with the bitter humiliation of 2016, there is no joy, there is only mud to fling and if you cannot find mud you have to make up some on your own. right mr. schiff? >> now adam schiff for the first time. >> lost slice, do you want to rock paper scissors. >> i been waiting for this my whole life. >> rock, paper scissors. >> i'll take it. [laughter] [laughter] greg: you have some kind of

connection, are you worried that this dog will get a swollen head and when a tv crew. >> i cannot wait to read the dogs book. [laughter] eventually he will write it up. the thing about the washington post and waiting for the headline this is adolf hitler cofounder of old wagon would be 120 years old. only thing more insulting is calling baghdadi islamic scholar calling the national post a scholar newspaper. it's a shame becomes a further we hit the president this much calling him an islamic scholar should be an insult to everyone everywhere. he drowned people. this is a terrorist. greg: how can you be so judgmental. [laughter] he's obama phobic.

>> he's making be sick to my stomach. >> i came up with a new illness. do you know what auntie dona is, the inability to feel pleasure. you painted a picture of the press. not to be confused, it's a little different, the inability to see anything joyous or positive in anything. they say woody allen has anna ae anti-dona i think you've got it. >> how do you feel about the d dog. >> he's a hero dog and i feel great but if the white house does not adopt which they need to do, you sure entrance or should adopt the dog. >> i said that on the five. [applause] the best thing about this, he will have the dog come to the white house and you know he's going to put a metal on the dog

and they're going to say oh my god the meme fulfilled itself. [laughter] building meme and it will come. what are your thoughts on this glorious week. >> it's been a wild week, the media again are outdoing themselves the probably upset that we killed baghdadi right when he got his msnbc contributor. [laughter] >> they lost one of their best, their shorthanded this week. [laughter] what can you do. greg: do you have another one? >> i uac you think you might have another joke in the chamber waiting to shoot up but maybe not. >> now that the stakes cannot be higher i have a joke. [laughter] >> the dog thing is funny

because it is so obviously a photoshop, there's only one dog up there and then a photo with trump. it's the same exact dog and the people in the new york times say we need to get our best. [laughter] greg: its canine gates. >> when we get a picture of the dog at the white house maybe we can photoshop in the golden state warriors the one the soccer team. [laughter] greg: that's all emert filling debtor. >> last word to you, thought from the dog, thought from the week. >> i used to really push back against people who compared trump to hitler then i saw he posted a meme that made it look like a dog within a place where the dog was not. and you feel how dangerous that is, we don't know how many

children died. i'm obviously joking but the thing is the people who made a big deal out of this clearly photoshop photo are the same people who do say that trump is dangerous. and it's like posting it clearly photoshop picture was a high crime and misdemeanor there be a lot of instagram models out there in trouble. , and makes no sense, i really thought that somebody was a horrendous monster then i probably would not be spending my time and resources going after their memes. i would think there were bigger things to deal with. so the word say trump is so dangerous and everyone is going to die but the actions show they cannot believe it because they have other things to focus on then it clearly photoshop photo of a dog. [laughter] [applause] greg: we are still not sure about that dogs pass. it's a she right? , i bet she urinated in public a

number of times. [laughter] and one more, if it had been a failure this would've been blasted on the network all year. they can about the other side what they would have done. >> up next, another smearing at a hearing. not that one, coming there's a company that's talked to even more real people than me: jd power. 448,134 to be exact. they answered 410 questions in 8 categories about vehicle quality. and when they were done, chevy earned more j.d. power quality awards across cars, trucks and suvs than any other brand over the last four years. so on behalf of chevrolet, i want to say "thank you, real people." you're welcome. we're gonna need a bigger room. and my lack of impulse control,, is about to become your problem. ahh no, come on.

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greg: she supposed to be doing work instead she's being a jerk, were talking about rashida, she held a sub hearing on vaping. >> doctor rizzo, is it safe to inhale these liquids contained inside e-cigarettes strictly into your lung. >> notes. >> can you explain how nicotine impacts rain development. >> straightforward questions of expert witnesses who gave the answers that she agrees with, but then it came time to question the one witness that supports vaping because it helps her quick smoking. she testified that vaping is not safe but less harmful than

cigarettes. this is how rashida tlaib question her. >> or want to know more about you and your beliefs, we all have different beliefs but you call yourself a converted conservative and reform marxist, are you conspiracy theorist. >> i think my politics are irrelevant to the syrian. >> why were you blinking at one of my colleagues. >> because i know him. >> he introduced me, he's a friend of mine. >> i did not know what the winking was i thought maybe there was a conspiracy thing going on, i did not know. >> you think there's a conspiracy. >> i actually think people are speaking truth and you can provide information. >> may i address the truth, the truth to you is different from the majority of the people in the room who believe -- >> you are still smoking. >> i'm not smoking.

>> that was the opposite of fair. [laughter] greg: my kat has a gambling problem. [laughter] i think you know, no matter what side you are on vaping i don't believe there's two sites, that citizen pays that woman to leave salary and i don't understand, she was so smug and disrespectful because she knew she was protected by her position. >> she is, that's how this works. when people do the things like repay their salary, do you have a choice, no. you pay their salary or go to

jail. [laughter] [applause] they believe their governments role because i'm the one that pays your salary, you have a choice, that would be like if someone mugged you in the near like i guess i'm not that guy's boss because i'm paying his salary. he's a very good employee. >> this is despicable. they have these questions like is it bad for you, what does that even mean, lots of things are bad for you. >> quite literally, is something not bad for you, no one wants to do it. [laughter] >> i quit smoking cigarettes with the juul and i think it's a lot better in the government didn't make me but my wife did but still i did not have a choice. >> she's my government and i pay her salary. without choosing to. but i'm just saying the idea

when you get to the nuts and bolts you see the laws that were passed, for cartridges, six-month indio, michigan. >> that your hometown. vaping got me off the cigarette and now i do not vaping anymore. >> i breathe more juul than air to be precise. >> you missed my favorite, by favorite i mean most disgusting ridiculous part of this interview, rashida tlaib said in the interview that secondhand smoke, worse then directly smoking cigarettes. >> amazing. [laughter] >> if that were true doctors would be prescribing cigarettes to children who lived in homes where their parents smoked. because it be better for the kids to be puffing squares then to be the around the secondhand smoke. this is the problem with her

government, whether it's a person tried to legislate on guns who's never shot one or this lady who apparently wants to give toddlers marble reds, they are legislating on things and trying to ban things and take things away that they don't know anything about. vaping is not the same as smoking, is it good for me know, but nothing i do is. [laughter] public health, england says 95% is safer. that is a big deal. so to be so arrogant about something that you are the dumbest person in the world on wanting to give cigarettes to kids, it is so wrong. it makes me sick, it makes me vaping more. [applause] >> the problem we have with people elected by people to do this, if you don't agree with me i will insult you, therefore the woman's time was spent clearing up whether she was a conspiracy

is in apparently a homewrecker. [laughter] [applause] >> i guess i could add something spiteful but maybe we could play the kat video again. [laughter] that with the cards is incredible. no you should not be in congress, go away. >> i cannot watch it. the issue is irrelevant. it's the way she treated the person made me sick to my poor stomach. >> all clean it up, i think she's a really, really great congresswoman. [laughter] let the record show that he winked at me. i am happily married i'll let you know. and if you meet us later at the

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and, the children's cancer research fund allows us to do just that. [♪] aishah: live from "america's news headquarters," i'm aishah hasnie. the impeachment inquiry against president trump is set to enter the next stage. fox news can confirm monday the house intelligence committee will be reviewing a report on the panel's investigation into

the president after a vote that is expected to fall down party lines. the vote will be sent over to the house judiciary committee to consider how and if to draft articles of impeachment begins the president. isis claimed responsibility for the deadly attack that killed two people and injured three others in london. so far the terrorist organization has not provided evidence to validate that claim. the attacker previously was charged with terrorism and spent six years in jail. showgrade got filledshow. >> climate change protesters in london recently gathered outside for a demonstration that involved using a fire truck to

spray blood on the façade. the group known as extinction rebellion claimed that they use nonviolent civil disobedience to affect change. in this case the politicians to the british government investment in fossil fuel, unfortunately they quickly lost control and things unraveled from there. [laughter] >> it went on for a while.

did i say unfortunately lost control, hilariously lost control, it looks like they did more damage to the earth with the oil-based tank with anyone with petroleum who said you cannot get your point across with plain old water. right? [laughter] 40 takes on that one until we got the one with we wanted. poor kid, i don't care. greg: climate change is right for the impurity and the impurity of themselves. >> this is rebellion, the x are is a serious group and they are about ready to start on monday and effort that could go over a couple of weeks of walking downtown london, central london. they have this whole massive campaign and much more organized and known in europe but they have a lot of support from other groups and they have been increasingly aggressive. the interesting thing with the story, that was a decommissioned fire truck. if we could think x are for anything we can think them

forewarning the metropolitan the police and counterterrorism people for this potential because there are no police around the treasury building, it took a while to respond in the decommissioned truck drove up and parked. >> you don't have to be a rocket scientist to say, you have to be kidding me. that's all we needed. now the authorities are on to this. >> there it is he has taught a valuable lesson to our law enforcement across the pond. you know what kills me -- >> it would not take that long. and i would enjoy every minute. i would go to the slumber with a smile on my face. you cradled me in my lifeless body. >> you can do this later. >> the reason why i mentioned ripping because i eat a lot of protein, i.e. red meat and if

the meat eaten begins what had a little protein they could held onto the damn rope. [laughter] >> true. >> can you imagine working a form of arcade, wait 15 minutes, they will pass out. you know what i'm saying keep continuing with your fake murders and vegan lifestyle. although there is a lot of pressure on the host. greg: integrate metaphor, people who claim to protect the earth do way more damage than anyone they condemned. >> it looks like brexit. this is how messy this whole thing is when boris johnson was not there. this is what kills me, who do they think has to go out and clean that up. and if they do block the streets, who will be harmed the most, people that need to get to work the work hourly jobs try to

put food on the table, they don't help their cause at all, they achieve nothing and until they're ready to talk about nuclear power as an option, i do not want to hear from them. i agree with that. i bet you have an analogy about a guy trying to impress a girl at a bar and he falls and cracks his goal, that's exactly what this is. [laughter] >> they want to impress and they did not, they just humiliated themselves. >> honestly i was going to say i feel bad for them. because they were so close. if they had just managed to get the fake blood only on the treasury building and not on themselves, climate change would have been solved. [laughter] obviously that's not a thing so people claimed are so passionate about this issue other than

coming with real solutions as dana mentioned about potential resolutions, they will throw fake blood at the problem, what problem has fake blood ever solved. i have never even thought about solving a problem that way and if some guy said he broke up with me in 2012 claims otherwise. [laughter] >> he is a liar and i have no idea how the blood got on my hands. >> who is on deck for the hall of fame, i am writing in your statement. and now adam schiff tries to take a nap,. [laughter] >> i should not have the second noble team, that's better.

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>> a musical crime time after time, the 2020 nominees for the rock 'n' roll hall of fame have been announced and snubbed once again the monkeys. [laughter] instead, dave matthews band gets on the ballot. let me tell you, the monkeys who kick dave matthews asked any day of the week. [cheering] [applause] have you ever listened to dave matthews, lucinda dave matthews. ♪. greg: that's all he does.

the ballot also includes crack work, pat benatar, doobie brothers, motorhead, thin lizzy, rufus, shaka con which raises the question is there a rufus minus shaka con? >> but my personal favorite judas priest. [cheering] and their amazing front man rob halford, the throaty growl, the studded leather chaps. that is rock 'n' roll. i love judas priest. i love rob and sometimes i think about him. >> oh yeah rob, judas priest. judas priest.

judas priest. [laughter] >> oh yeah rob. greg: oh yeah, i hope i have him freaked out. who should get in, do you care. >> i blacked out, what happened. [laughter] i had to go to a happy place. that was funny for like three seconds and then it got very weird. >> to do in that award? yes greg weird. i don't want to see them much leather again in my life. the rock 'n' roll hall of fame is such a weird thing, notorious b.i.g. was on and on like that is great, but to go back to point, the monkey everyone knows who they are they have the tv show that runs today and i remember their music as a small

child, something that's memorable and carries on to the decades. that's a music essence of what is supposed to be in hall of fame so i don't understand why they would be included. >> they should be taken fiercely. should there be a hall of fame for something that is 60 years old. they don't have a hall of fame for girls, that's all the rolling stones where. >> what i love my mom sent me the link and said don't forget to vote for the rock 'n' roll hall of fame. >> did you vote. >> yes. >> timeout, i'm sorry, we have been doing rock 'n' roll stories for five years and you are just now loading, sorry, wow. >> go ahead. >> i'm sorry that whitney

houston and pat benatar and i was shocked to learn that when houston was not and it already. in dave matthews band, that was my era and college. [laughter] >> all college girls love dave matthews. >> in the mid-90s. greg: let's not forget, dave matthews tour bus took a crab all over a bunch of people. they dumped their sewage. >> still better than listening. [laughter] [applause] >> out of the 16 nominees, only ten can be considered rock 'n' roll. they need to have a different hall of fame, the fact that madonna got in a 2008 judas priest is not in there or motorhead these are bands that actually are, rock 'n' roll you had a guitar and drums and stuff like that. [applause] even craftwork thinks there good bands but they should not be in there. i think it's hilarious metalhead

don't get enough credit, when rob came out as gay, no one cares. i don't know if it was because the album they gave us the clues we need. [laughter] , we are okay with him being metal and gay. [laughter] >> all the bikers fans of judas priest thought he was into bikes. [laughter] >> just like rob halford. maybe i am gay. >> are you excited, have you voted. >> no. >> the dave matthews band thing, you cannot deny they are very famous and very popular, they are popular with this segment of the population that cries during. [laughter] that's what all of their songs sound like, a dude violently crying during. listen to the lyrics. where are you going, with the long face pulling down.

don't hide away like an ocean. that you cannot see but you can small. in the sound of the waves crash down. who talks like that. [laughter] who is out for, that is for dudes that started smoking pot before they stopped breast-feeding. [laughter] >> it sounded like you were singing to a horse, long face. [laughter] greg: how can you hide like an ocean, the earth is covered by the ocean. >> if i was covered by the ocean i'd be pissed off. >> the ocean stinks it's filled with so sewage from dave matthews tour bus. greg: you will love the next story. he brought a clown to the interview. perhaps the best idea

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greg: when your job is going down send in the cloud. a man from new zealand, has been there named joshua jack was recently called into a work meeting and feared the worst that he was getting fired. he hired an emotional support clown to join him.

apparently companies in new zealand are legally to help cushion the blow getting canned. he was right, he did get fired by having the clown made it not so bad. it was noisy, him making balloon animals so he didn't have to tell him to be quiet from time to time. the clown cost $200 or as joe biden says -- >> i'm going to milk that joke the whole year. jack has already landed another job in the clown got a new job ♪ ♪ all right, heather, why is

this not shocking, is this the direction of the world, you take a support person everywhere. >> yes an animal, dog, some planes see ostriches, different types of animals. >> you know i was at a meeting years ago when somebody brought their parent to a job review. he thought he was getting fired. >> and he probably got fired anyway just like this guy. >> and then your $200 out-of-pocket, huge workplace destruction per the blue animals were causing so much noise in the office they had to tell the cloud to tone it down. the workplace still allows you to bring in a clown, that is pretty cool. [laughter] >> clown face. >> white people are great, you're so ingenious when it comes to losing jobs, were not signing thing and were not coming in.

are you coming in next thursday, i'm not coming. [laughter] i know what's about to happen. i get water water calls to, hell no i'm not coming i'm not flying into get fired. but in an agency, how do not get promoted. he literally brought a clown in and gave them a sales pitch, instead of firing me, watch this clown, for some reason i'm watching the clown, he is suggested. i used to work with cars, come down and watch us make balloon animals and by a car when you're done. an ad agency. >> it was genius. >> this guy is legend. bringing a clown, i have some of my buddies from the military that have service dogs and it's really helped their lives but everybody ruins it, people abuse it. -- bringing up pluto on the

plane is not believable. >> pluto can be supportive. >> what if you walked on a plane with a blowup supportive doll. [laughter] >> i did that once, you had to bring it up. we are editing it. >> you have done this to me all the time in our relationship, you hurt me in front of people and i'm getting you back. that is it. he's a really mean person. >> i only talk about your fashion, i'd like to see you tony down you must be in a relationship. >> you stole his joke. >> we joked together. [laughter] >> it is true, you used to wear fancy pants -- >> i am not a performer. >> because you are happy. >> you let your hair grow out and put on weight. >> is happy weight.

>> it is not true. >> i'm shattering expectation. >> we veered off, what you got. >> i would like to say, i respect this, do not understand it. no offense to clowns in north fence to the guy who was in clown college when we were dating in 2012, brian if you are watching, don't take it personally. >> you dated clowns. >> no clown college. brian, not about you. but i have never been in any situation and thought you know what would make this better, a clown. especially if i'm getting fired i don't want to be around bright colors and balloon animals, i want to bring somebody who's in a worse situation than me. give me the chick who just got served divorce papers and her 61 and she's only 25 and her house

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>> you are impossible. [applause] greg: thank you so much for watching. we will see you not >> welcome to "watters world" i'm jesse watters. we should be used to it by now the democrats pollsters media they've been wrong about trump every day for the last three years. remember in 2016 they said billionaire from new york didn't stand a chance had at just getting nomination. >> got he's not going to be the nominee he has -- he's not. as much as we would like it he's not going to be the nominee because he's just made himself unelectable in a general election. he's not going to be the nominee although one debated at a time he took down each of the republican rivals until last man on stage. then came the general, and they said crooked hillary was going to smoke him. >> i also