tv The Greg Gutfeld Show FOX News May 9, 2020 10:00pm-11:00pm PDT
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news for supporting working mothers every day everywhere. thank you for watching i am judgeg for truth justice and the american way. the gray got till show is coming up, see you next time ♪ ♪. greg: let's start with something adorable from politico. an article called hobos were on women, they offered this sentence. it is true that more men are dying and women from covid-19 around the world but that is not exactly cause for celebration. isn't it nice of politico, mike dad's death, your son's death, not exactly a cause for celebration, now this casual endorsement of gender side was written by two people but is also seen by an editor, a copy editor, may be a terrified
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intern instill the line seemed okay with them. these are the same people that set their hair on fire every time trump makes an casual unedited, which they take literally, so can gasoline, light it and toss into what they call a debate. this was not offhand, this is edited, nice work politico. from now on your extinction will be exactly my cause for celebration. it's one example of the reflex of the media to inject psychotic woke is him into realms that have never belonged. since we've always poisoned sports, romance and movies with identity driven, why not science. and yet it's the media who in this pandemic, still believe they are the ones were sufferi suffering. and why trump? in the hollywood reporter, journalist covering him has ruined their lives, their
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weekends are gone, worklife balance has vanished, it's tragic really. now they wonder how they can keep going if trump is reelected. note, the article in which some but not oral journalist whined about doing their job, this ran during a pandemic with 33 million people out of jobs. i'd call that bad timing. the poor reporters, if only you had easier troughs like trucking, nursing or policing, a 12-year-old could do your job provided a tall girl has a bottle of scotch. an unnamed cnn producer actually said nobody i know is rooting for trump to lose, i guess he's never met anyone in the network. >> the president acknowledging that reopening our country will rightfully kill more of us but we have to get our country back. how can he accept that when he has not even come close to doing what he can to avoid more pain and death. >> what is it about president
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obama that really gets under your skin. is it because he's smarter than you, life is more accomplished, better looking. greg: that was kinda gross. they aren't rooting against the president and i'm the milk under my pillow guy. the cure for obesity that accused him of fat shaming. the media sites mental exhaustion which i get after eight years of coasting with obama but trump makes them work because they hate him so. in the hate gets them out of bed which is why they pined for their ticket to hibernation in geriatric joe. maybe the media should not work so hard, good example of taking it easy, chris cuomo when he interviews his own brother andy after it was revealed new york state force contagious page patients leading to thousands of preventable deaths, when did chris ask hasbro. >> do you think that you are an
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attractive person because you're single and ready to mingle. do you really think your ended desirable single person and not just people's pain coming out of them. >> i think the beauty is in the eye of the beholder. greg: that is riveting but why stop there, i would love to know if andy enjoys romantic comedies, candlelit dinners and people are dying to know or just dying, andrew cuomo is a hero he had out-of-state health workers who were helping in new york to now pay new york taxes, that's like handing your dry-cleaning bill to the guy who just perform the heimlich maneuver on you. yeah yeah, you save my life but you ruined my shirt. it's like you asking me too help you move then you make me pay for the pizza. it is no surprise how much great press cuomo gets from the press, he's a democrat and his brother has a show but also the media
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preferred andy show to donald, they would not air trump's briefings while drooling over the gloves, and some pretty major mistakes. initially the governor played on the virus, then the state accelerated outbreaks among the most vulnerable people in rest homes while leaving the navy hospital ship in the mass at javits center nearly empty. still andy's bro prefers to lecture you. >> some of these fools, fools, i know they want to be out there, fools, it's not about you. what about the other people. i'm not going to castigate you, that's not my job, i'm not your daddy. greg: oh my god, stable and well-paying, your work is in a pandemic, the more likely you will stake crab like that. because it is easy, the check still come in. take madeira, madonna, they added their names to an open letter demanding more from we not return to normal after the lockdown, they want the world to
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continue not to work because they never really did. they want to end unbridled consumerism which denies the value of life itself of plants, animals but also humans which to them came in third period does that mean no more muted under movies or music, i don't think these idiots thought this all the way through. but it's also not a problem when you made your money already, you get stupid about the world, you get money dumb so now you're seen a dual disconnect as the media dismisses america's concerns so do celebrities and when fonda, meant to madeira and madonna are all near and, what else can they do would take it n you. they see the tragedy that killed thousands as an opportunity for radical change which is left for destruction of the world on the other side of the security gate community. they're rich enough to endure that. as for you, you good luck you're just a speedbump on the way to grant a thud brings thunderdome.
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♪ let's welcome tonight's guest, she is business in the front and business in the back, fox business network anchor dagen mcdowell. he is so courageous i hope it's contagious, retired fox news contribute to joey joe's. >> she is from detroit, host of sincerely on cat fox nation, kat timpf. the northstar is his nightlife, my massive sidekick in host of enough said, he has a smile on fox nation it is tyrus. all right joey, young celebrities say the world should not change after they really got their piece of the action. don't you love that. joey: you know when you have dan come in and tell you how the world should work, kim jong-un and were not available for comment on how much american
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capitalism sock. these are people that would have an expected mother then tells you who lives or dies and they won't tell you about paper plastic or when you should leave your home or staying in and what it is, they know everyone economically is in a bad place right now, it's a perfect time to slide and climate change because that's exactly what that would do, the policy they want to promote. greg: that is so true, dagen there continues to be a massive disconnect between the media and celebrity and everybody else, i.e. normal people. if you're concerned about getting food on your table you're kind of in a whole. dagen: what's in short supplies, frozen peas, paper towels, toilet paper but it's so good to see that sanctimony and are in short supply into bed we can't wiper ass. if you walk around new york city
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you see the people that watch the networks and who vote for these liberal lunatics and bow into office. every time i go running, i will run into some nanny nancy's and techies who will stop in the middle of the sidewalk in lower their mask to scream at me, put your mask on, put your mask on, there like pelosi, i'm like lady i am 50 feet away from you. shut up. these are the people that are watching the networks in voting for these idiots. greg: that reminds me, a different question, watching cuomo school people for being outside when in fact, a lot of this research is becoming to implicate putting people anti-quarters and introducing contagions is not a good idea. kat: look, it's all a bunch of virtue signaling all over the place then rather than actually
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carrying. to go back to the point that you made about the celebrities and the rich people who signed the letter saying that consumerism is awful and evil, it's a hypocrisy that is insulting to me. they never worked a day in their life, i have to disagree, madonna, like a prayer, don't act like you've never sing that in the shower. almost 3 30 years later that is going on. she's worked $570 million, don't say consumers are so awful, i see you keep your money, you earned it, do what you want but don't insult all of her intelligence. greg: i guess you're right about madonna she had a few hits. i love baby hit me one more time that was good. [laughter] tyrus, finish it up for us. tyrus: any time you can afford the luxury to have first world problems, it's so easy to tell you what not to do when you're literally set for rising your family is set for life, and say
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let's not have capitalism or do these things anymore because i can afford not to do those things. but for the fellow americans that are literally check to check and have to make tough decisions, sometimes you cannot always worry about how much plastic is in the ocean because you're trying to worry about hominy coins are in your bank account. it is really not fair to put those type of things on american people or shame them. another thing that aside, carry masks, go places with masks but i don't shame people for not wearing a masks and i see originally what is supposed to be for health is turning into a political divide. if you wear a mask, your liberal and a democrat and if you're not wearing a mask you republican in your anti-american. it's literally both sides, were using the mask as a political statement and that is sad. kat: and if you see the light of day your murder. greg: i actually were two masks, one on my face, well anyway.
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tyrus: there we go. greg: i'm happy to announce my latest book self-help, for people who hate self-help, a guide to help you all through life especially times like these to teach you how to brainwash herself into better behavior and eliminating the minuses. it's about how to do positive things if you are a positive person like me. i just wrote a self-help book, but it's awesome too. it starts july 28 but you can preorder your copy now, it's available at g gutfeld.com at all major book retailers. okay, coming up more on joe biden sex life, we remember in case you - hey, can i... - safe drivers save 40%!!! guys! guys! safe drivers save 40%!!! safe drivers save 40%! safe drivers save 40%!!! that's safe drivers save 40%. it is, that's safe drivers save 40%. - he's right there. - it's him! safe drivers do save 40%. click or call for a quote today.
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greg: oh yeah you want to see advice you better play nice, new poll finds dems want joe biden to pick liz warren for bp, pocahontas broke out the peace pipe this week she called his denial against accusations of sexual assault credible and convincing, remember this is the same liz who destroyed bloomberg for vile charges but what good are principles of you cannot set them on fire. add nancy pelosi who agrees allegation are closed issue.
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i doubt that, joe says if elected hill reversal rule issued by education secretary betsy devos that bolsters protection for college students accused of sexual assault on campuses. he is trying to block resumption of innocence for students which is exactly what is pleading for himself. that is rich. meanwhile, this fella can barely muster up support for captain fingers. >> though i am providing and i want everything to go well for biden we have a person who is very capable backup if you will, not vice president, something would change which we have nothing will change. greg: and that's an endorsement, hate to see a non-endorsement. joe biden at least he's not dead. nope, he still good for slip. >> the pandemic, the president
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has no intercourse whatsoever with the rest of the world. greg: think god for that, that 6 billion people. that wasn't even joe's weirdest moment this week. right joe. >> now joe biden facetime liz warren. >> hey liz, it's joe. i have a problem. did you hear donald trump wants to murder hoarding hornets. >> yes is a woman of color i am totally qualified to speak on this issues. >> whether the hornets ever do except play great basketball for the people. >> that's why you need a vp who knows about this stuff, just ask my friend michael jordan, we played together for the chicago bulls in the 80s. >> did somebody say 80s.
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>> hunter, is that you. >> joe, that's my friend nancy, we started the suffrage movement with her roommate in college susan b anthony. >> yes, i told her everything i know about racism, donald trump, of course donald trump's racism. >> it sounds like were coming from the same cloth. i used to go ice fishing with the ghost of walking fix. >> i think he's still alive. >> of course the fish are still alive, i throw them back, catch and release hunter catch and release. >> oh my god. [laughter] greg: well done. working two jobs. how close do you think warren is to be in the vp pick do you think it is real? kat: there is one democrat who really, really want elizabeth
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warren to be the vp pick and that democrat's name is elizabeth warren. you can tell as you pointed out from the differences between how she responded to the allegations against biden versus how she responded against bloomberg. totally took down bloomberg, totally full throated defense against biden, the difference between the two is bloomberg was her opponent but biden she sees an opportunity. which proves that to her, the most important thing is her own ambition and getting to a position of power and control and that is exactly the kind of person that should not and is not supposed to reach a position of power in this country. greg: she outshines biden, she was always good have to watch his step, she knows he was a heartbeat away and a faint heartbeat. dagen, watching did nero talk about biden was sad especially when he was mentioning cuomo is
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a great possibility for president, it's like when your girlfriend starts talking about your hot younger brother in front of you. it is painful. dagen: it is painful but watching did nero is painful, everybody has their impression, you can do jimmy conway like kicking billy bats to death in the bar but this is your new impression, you have the glazed look on his face like joe biden, you know he's thinking about what is going to eat on his hot dog. today's going to be mustered or is it going to be catch up or relish, it's the other blank stare and it's easy from elizabeth warren to show up joe biden because it looks like she knows what day of the week it is. greg: that's the thing tigress. i think the dems are really worried about joe and i think joe has no clue that they are
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worried. tyrus: i think dinero insulted him a little bit, he insulted him a little bit. [laughter] >> another thing as an actor but luckily for me the whole improv thing, never have an actor improv, you have to ride it out and scripted out. that's what he was like, it's not going to say on the ticket biden and whoever the vp and if things get weird cuomo. that's not how it works in the real of real world. that's how you have to ride it out, she adam schiff is a scriptwriter, when you what did nero on he is a shift writer, the guy in the moody's that everybody thinks is so sharp and it always avoids being arrested, were that i cannot talk his way out of a party ticket. >> before i go to joey, it is so true because what a letdown the
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real de niro was from the role but assuming he was a really interesting person. he is an inseparable bore joey, all right. this theme are over biden? joey: the reason why he comes across that way actors don't have personality so you have to describe that to them much like politicians, you're looking at vp for joe biden, stacey abrams and elizabeth warren don't have a truthful background so they can prescribe into them. elizabeth warren is a native american and stacey abrams is qualified as a governor in their own minds are in pretty good shape. now you have these two very accomplished women of color buying for the vice presidency and i think the democratic party will look for whomever would make the best president in case we get to mid-october and joe biden is no longer coherent were these things start sticking to him. greg: joe biden does not know
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what day it is. coming up michael flynn when in adam schiff loses once what does it mean to be a good neighbor? it means being there for each other. that's why state farm is announcing the good neighbor relief program we know our customers are driving less, which means fewer accidents. so state farm is returning $2 billion dollars to auto policyholders for the period ending may 31st. and we'll continue making real time decisions to best serve you - our customers. because now, more than ever, being a good neighbor means everything. like a good neighbor, state farm is there.
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governors to make a change. florida and missouri say the production of their own equipment will drive down in shipping costs. covid-19 complications affecting children including swollen blood advice he wills and -- blood vessels and heart problems. so far three children have died and 70 more have been diagnosed. there is no proof that the coronavirus caused the syndrome but cuomo launched an investigation. greg: it is not where attack to be a democrat. you remember last week we learned the fbi notes from top officials that show them mulling whether to get michael flynn to lie so they can prosecute him or get him fired. the justice department dismissed the case saying he was conducted
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without any legitimate investigative bias. hooray, there is more, the mueller probe went far beyond what we previously thought the justice department released a scope memo were acting attorney rob rosenstein gave him authority to investigate the truck team well beyond the mandate of collusion and obstruction. adam schiff is the chair sure law enforcement until officials affirming they had no evidence of collusion between the trump campaign in russia during the 2016 election, amazing. so is adam schiff 9 inches around the neck. >> shifty shift, 9 inches around the neck, i watched this guy uses as world smallest collar, i watched him this morning talking so aggrieved, he knows he got caught and not only caught if he
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were in the halls of congress, he'd be in jail. >> yes he got caught, i wonder how adam feels about that. >> now adam schiff practices social distancing. >> leave it in the box. >> wager mask, your parked at a hydrant you're going to have to move that. >> adam you still got it. >> social distancing, robots, clever. thank you for your service, you forgot one, gentlemen you forgot
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one, gentlemen, congressman, this will be investigated. >> all right dagen, michael flynn had to sell his house to offset all the legal fees and still cannot pay it all off, what should he get in return. >> as someone i spent all of my free time sitting around trying to concoct ways to get revenge on men who have wronged me so i've been thinking about this a lot, how do you get back it jim comey, do you make him work at disney world for free, you definitely start by taking away all the mirrors in his home, sasquatch, with adam schiff, maybe something involving mosquitoes, that's where i would start and maybe milk of magnesia, make it grow. >> i was a fan of milk of
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magnesia, the minty flavor was so refreshing, then it dried around the bottle and flaked off. it was all over the bathroom. , tigress and going to stop talking about things. isn't flynn an example of anybody being in the trump universe, that means everybody from fans, wing red hat, people posting names, writing songs, being a target because they did not like anybody associated with trump. tyrus: i will give it to michael flynn row quick but i don't see what sasquatch did to deserve to be thrown in with a group, he's already hiding forever as it is, now he's never going to come out, thank you so much dagen coming out of line, little bit, you are out of line a little bit, leave sasquatch alone. >> i'm going to be honest with you, i don't see the different between what we were supposed to be stopping as the russians when the behavior the democrat was
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very russian, what evidence, they would just make it up, the only thing they did not do was have general flynn slip out of the window when he was coming his way to court, literally that's only thing that did not happen. it is absolutely unreal to me how un-american, this man was a general who dedicated his life to the country and not only was he financially destroyed, his reputation was destroyed and they're just going to say no matter what the deal they dismissed, where does he go from here, i think the only thing that is right is by making him the head of the fbi. greg: i asked my wife, why is it people in russia who were involved of some kind of thing are pushed out of windows and she looked at me and says is there any other way? [laughter] so i backed away from the window quickly. tyrus: i saw lynette greg.
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greg: don't you feel good for flynn? joey: absolutely, i feel i owe him apology because they did not shape him enough when they had all the information and quite honestly i did not feel like if he did do what they accused them up it was that big of a deal, i was a guy who was interviewed by the united states government twice to include my ex-girlfriend and her appearance on my character on who i am so i get a security clearance to take up our bombs and learn about them. i can guarantee when they ask you about my drinking habits you can probably say this might've been a lie. but i told them what they needed to know so i can do a cool job. so what does line mean, there's a white lie, saying you look pretty when you don't, i don't know what they classify as a lie but when you start this with a question, do you want to be here today and i tell you yes and that's a lie, there is no consequence to that, in our learning there's no consequence to the lie that he supposedly told or has admitted to. but if you're out there and
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you're saying -- he said he liked, he admitted to lying so he deserves all this, when you're choosing between a national hero that might've lied in the united states government that tried to corner him a core his him to do it, i'll think the private enter private citizen of what he admitted guilt to in a plea deal. greg: cat, everybody, you get involved in a plea deal because they're basically ruining your life so a lot of people plead guilty, we know this, your libertarian because their lives are being ruined and that's the only way out from being more ruined. kat: all of this flynn stuff has been talked about strickler politically and is not that i don't understand why there has been political discussions because a lot of the arguments you can make that there were certainly politics involved in the investigation but i don't understand why that's only discussion were having, particularly from democrats, if you look at the way he was treated by the fbi, they were
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all saying, this happens all the time as if it's defense, but that makes it worse, stop thinking about in terms of republican versus democrat, as an american, do you want your law enforcement agencies to be behaving this way, do you want the system to allow for political bias regardless of who teams it does or does not benefit because it's our duty as americans to hold these institutions accountable so they don't have too much power over us to use these sorts of things. so you can talk about the politics, but you miss the forest for the trees, whatever, how the saying goes, you gotta say hey, this is not okay for all of us as americans and we have certain rights, and we cannot let this abuse of power and make excuses for it. greg: my favorite part of this whole story, ilhan omar said that gwen verdict was part of white privilege, talk about privilege, i cannot marry my
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sibling, i have three sisters, i cannot marry any of them. you want to talk about privilege omar. dagen: i will leave that alone, not legally but i know something about this. greg: it was hypothetical. coming up something scarier than a pandemic, i think we found what happened daddy? well, you see here... there's a photo of you and there's a photo of your mommy and then there's a picture of me. but before our story it goes way, way, way back with your great, great, great grandparents. see this handsome man, his name is william. william fell in love with rose and they had a kid. his name was charles and charles met martha... isn't she pretty? yeah. you should be mad they gave this guy a promotion. isn't she pretty?
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murderous moniker how they aggressively attac attack their victims with high doses of venom. in the case of bees they rip their heads off and feed the corpse to their children. it sounds like my ex-wife. kidding, i have no ex-wives. that are still alive. ♪. greg: so, what does it feel like getting stung by one of these things, if it's anything like getting tattooed, this guys going to lose it. [shouting] greg: i am like that every time i see a friend's rerun word centered on phoebe. [laughter] tyrus, do you feel bad that the murder of hornets are not
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getting the press they deserve because it's during a pandemic? tyrus: i am furious as a hornets activist. be fair to hornets. murder hornets are as dangerous as you think, their dangerous to the bees indigenous here because they don't deal with them like the bees in japan do. there are very susceptible to overheating, when they come into bite the heads off of their victims, the japanese be smother them and heat up their bodies and they sacrifice themselves and cook the superordinate alive in the hive so what you have to do, beekeepers have to bring in the indigenous bees and do hybrid because bees exchange information and they can actually wear them out. # david. greg: nicely done. that was good stuff. i believe cnn was one of the first media outlets to call it the asian murder be trauma housing a phobic is not attributed to asia.
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greg.kat: is only xenophobia if trump's has become a those are the rules, i don't make them i just noticed them. i want to push back on what tyrus said because i've read some articles too. washington post for example said they interviewed a bunch of bug experts in the bug experts had, no big deal, they don't really care people that often and we haven't seen any live ones this year but i would like to counter that by saying have you seen their faces, there are pictures coming out of their faces and also how much can we really trust the bug experts, get that they are bugs experts but also their bug experts. they looked at their world and their live like i know what i want to do i want to study bugs for my life, so that is fine but i don't necessarily trust you to have the same view of the world
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as i do. tyrus: i'm glad they don't. greg: [laughter] greg: joey do believe the hype in this, is this another media -- i grew up on the year of the killer bees. kat: the swarm. greg: dagen i'll ask you, joey was three when the hopping, the swarm, the movie. dagen: i was afraid of three things, deathly afraid of three things when i was a little kid, bigfoot, he's not running the fbi anymore so i'm not worried about it. charles manson, he is dead but the killer bees are back. now i'm going to be up at night. greg: joey, is the media hype, do you care at this point? during a pandemic? joey: this might be the deadliest 2 inches since harvey weinstein contracted an std. but as a guy with metal legs that's not afraid of snakes or
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ants anymore, and. of afraid of these, they fly and i can't get away very quickly, the insects and they can fly and they can kill you. i'm a little bit worried. greg: we will keep on top of the story -- no were not. why would i say that, were not keeping on top of the story. the greatest baby name ever. ♪ good morning, mr. sun. good morning, blair. [ chuckles ] whoo. i'm gonna grow big and strong. yes, you are. i'm gonna get this place all clean.
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symbol pronounced ash, a 12, musk. which sounds like a number, weird but it beats their second choice which was pi to the 100 place, try to put that on a college application, am i right america, anyway elon musk was act about the name on rogan. >> how do you say the name. [laughter] >> well. >> first of all my partners one that mostly came up with the name. >> congratulations to her, yeah she's graded names. greg: he blames his girlfriend, grimes i would never do that to you. you made a mistake, she explains her son's name, x is the unknown variable, a is my spelling of a one, 812 is a precursor to sr 17 our favorite aircraft, is
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actually the sr 71, great battle but nonviolent, but she had me at x, i can pronounce up but i cannot pronounce this kids name, let's turn to jerry for tutori tutorial. greg: my goodness. thank you jerry for that. kat, i love grimes, but it makes it hard for the kid every time you have to fill out paperwork. can you imagine being behind him at the dmv in there like we cannot read your handwriting and he's like no that's what it is, my mom is grimes. kat: i saw a lot of people on twitter say how dare they do
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this, this kid will be made fun of so much it's not nice, i'm not disputing the kit the kid will be made fun of buddies elon musk kid so he will not be able to hear it because his ear will be stuff lamenting. [laughter] this kid is probably going to be taking a rocketship to mars for spring break. what i was doing when i was younger spring break at floating around my parents above ground pool. i'm not knocking that, that was a lot of fun especially when brittany would come over and play marco pollo. greg: joey i think they're probably really rich celebrities, the name they give the kid in the name the kid ends up using which is butch. joey: what was that button and ashtray, some of the celebrity names, is it johnny, joseph jones, that was enough, let's call you joey until you start school and get really confused, i'm an expert on this and the
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unique names are an asset they make fun of him and they make fun of yourself, there you go, this is an exercise in audacity, why did they name of something stupid because they can and they kid will have a great life either way. greg: tyrus have your children, have you ever thought of naming them something silly. tyrus: yeah, like take them. if you want to name your kid, a, y, o, you, how can you mrs., you have been covering artificial intelligence taken over the planet since i met you, it even says in the name, artificial intelligence. how could you sleep on this one. the worst are moore's movie and was a put it out there, that's meeting change. the artificial war is coming. the computers are taken over and you put it out there.
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greg: i was blinded by my love for grimes and i did not see she's trying to destroy humanity. i have all of her records. greg: it is over. dagen, she made a wrong choice with elon musk, he blinked her commie he should've taken the bullet for her. dagen: no, she came up with the name, she has to own it, being someone who carried a weird name with me my whole life, at least it won't autocorrect into davenport which mind does strangely. the kid has to weird parents so give the kid a name the other kids will think is awesome like eminem or cheese it's or chewbacca. who doesn't love chewbacca. greg: all i know congratulations to both of how they gonna pay for this? they will, but with accident forgiveness allstate won't raise your rates
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greg: we are out of time, thinking to dagen mcdowell, joey jones, tyrus, kat timpf, i love i'm jon scott. see you tomorrow. [♪] jesse: welcome to "watters world." i'm jesse watters. >> two weeks ago we are probably first administration in modern history who hasn't had a major scandal in the white house. jesse: what a joke. the obama people got caught this week and it looks like it went straight to the top. remember the obama officials who told the country trump was a traitor. >> the great case officer, vladimir putin. he knows how top handle an asset and that'
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