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>> greg: all right, happy friday. almost saturday. so being an adult is harder than it looks. take it from me, i am someone with a heart of a child. which i keep in the glove compartment. yeah, uncomfortable laughter. that's my middle name. >> you are pretty comfortable with it. >> greg: according to a new survey of 2,000 recent grads, 81% of them wish they were taught more life skills before graduating. apparently demanding an end to miss gender a nonbinary students and the geology department wasn't enough prep on how to pay bills without selling your kidneys on craigslist. that was a long sentence. the top skill these young people wish they knew more about include how to and fast as well as long-term financial planning which is weird since who needs long-term everything if the world is going to end in eight years. if aoc is correct, you might as well take up smoking. crack, meth, crack and meth. other concerns or home maintenance like resetting a

wi-fi router, doing laundry, and perhaps the most important skill of all, unclogging the toilet. sorry, but what is to learn about unclogging the toilet? first off, flushing things that aren't toilet paper, emily. >> come god. >> greg: and second, blame it on whoever you are living with. but what this tells you is that these little faberge eggs have never heard of a plunger. when i grew up, the only household tools be used where the plunger and the can opener. and god forbid you mix them up. something tells me if you handed the plunger to a recent grad they would attach a blm side to the end of the handle and wear it like a rubber skullcap to an anti-copper ali. that's a good look. other findings were not learning how to budget.

one in five don't know how to cook. the same number can do their own laundry, which is mind-blowing. how hard is it really to do your laundry? just take a shower with your clothes on. what do see does every morning. when you get up that early. their top financial stress is being there doll not their monthly rent. but that is why stripping was invented. how do you think i could afford my gym dues? shaky knees hips. so why all the regret about locking real-life skills? because now they are in real life. and college had indulged a juvenile fantasy world, that's like cnn. they charged a fortune to tell you the skills that made their parent successful enough to afford tuition. god forbid american flags. it's far better to condemn capitalism than a minute you benefit from it. so what is the number one skill

in life that you should have that you should have learned in my opinion? it is to be useful. it's that simple. it overrides education and wealth. if you are useful, you are indispensable. it's the opposite of the academics definition of health, that fake activist behavior. nearly during the anthem, burning down a city block, dying your hair blue, screeching at cops who make less than your yoga instructor. now, that isn't being useful. that is the phony college definition of importance. inflating your own ego and making use of the center of attention. what kind of clueless narcissist acts like that? [laughter] it's no life skill. you know what is a life skill? dial-in conflict down instead of up. that is useful. as parent households dwindle, god is the example site for

parents. the skill of dialing it down is lost and would fill that hole is the worst thing you could imagine. the mob. and i'm not talking about the mafia, they have much better food. i mean the gawking hordes of social media who prefer it you dial things up and not down. so we have a generation egged on by likes and clicks who when they see something bad happening, instead of helping, turning to scorsese with a smartphone. as college deprives you of life skills, the only thing left that you can grab is this exhibition activism. have you ever imagine the life of an activist? a modern activist. did they ever enjoy a leisurely dinner? no. do they have a comfortable group of friends that they can bowl with? no. could they help you out in a clutch? no. holy, i think i described to me. they don't have jobs or a car or even wisdom. could they be in a relationship

with anyone beyond a therapist or the amazon delivery guy? no, who would agree to that. where would you honeymoon? even more, they have no life skills. just resentments, student debt, and hate. maybe they don't need life skills because they don't have lives. the elite activist class prefers it that way. their grip is dead and woke ends up with awake. but academia knows that if you can't survive in real life, you will cling to their better offerings. he wouldn't be able to clog a toilet because you are just too full of [bleep]. [applause] >> let's welcome tonight's guests! the national -- what was that? the national guard gets aroused

when they call in this unit. the only time he gets left is from asking women to dance. when she talks, ben shapiro tells to slow down. emily compagno. and finally, he so huge we use his socks as parachutes, my massive sidekick and host of an upset on fox news, tyrus. i'm glad we put acid in water for the audience. you can tell. so pete, you have 30 -- what, 33 children? >> 33, yup. >> and i asked him how many nannies it takes. for nannies on call? >> when necessary, yeah. >> greg: all right, what do you consider useful life skills

that would -- that you would like to see your kids learn? >> in preparing for the segment i thought about when i have to stop doing things for my kids and when i need to start making them do them. it's not a clear line, some kids are ready for it earlier, but that is the responsibility of parents. and in some places, i remember i took a home act class in junior high and i learned how to write a check, that was nice. i should've taken shop class, because i have no idea what to do with it. >> greg: we've got joe mackie here. any guy whose jacket sifts up, he know stuff. [laughter] >> greg: he's like knight rider without the car. >> yeah. >> greg: where is your talking car, joe? >> i don't need a talking car, i have my phone for that. >> greg: what about your kids? you're saying it's better to almost free range them like they're them out there? >> yes, at some point you just have to let them go. i make pancakes for them. in the next year or so, you

figure it out. make them for me, i will tolerate the mess. that is what they are. free labor eventually. >> greg: what's going to happen when i'm old? >> you could pay my kids. >> greg: there you go. >> but then they go to a safe space in a bubble where they get in intersectionality at degree and they've never done the laundry. but now i know why the antifa riots smell so poorly, there's no laundry getting done getting done. >> greg: tyrus, you are the other person here with the children >> allegedly. >> greg: what would happen -- [laughs] is there any danger that your children could end up as woke activist? >> not at all. i believe in the sea turtle parenting theory, critical sea turtle theory. you hatch an egg, you pull yourself up from the sand. well, good luck. and they know. this is the fault or the guilt

of parents who work hard. and they feel guilty because they've got to work that 45 hour shift for the 50 hour shift. they try to protect. they want to do everything for their kids because they feel like they are making up for lost time. but what you were making is a spoiled brat and a victim who then learns how to manipulate his vervet doll my favorite thing to do is -- mom, i'm playing a game. mom, i don't want to do it. the ones who complain say they never learned life skills. no, you were taught. you just chose not to pay attention because he were on your phone or on your game or whatever it was that you wanted to do at that time. oh, gee, i wish i would've learned how to do laundry. she did. you just didn't want to do it. how hard is it to learn laundry? >> here's the deal. my mother worked hard, but she didn't feel guilt. she was -- she worked hard and couldn't go party. so if my clothes had stayed --

you -- you figure it out. you can read, write question mike you go to school five days a week, so you to learn something. good luck. and at first you are like -- and then you figure it out. because you don't want to be made fun of at school. there needs to be -- you need to let them fail. we'll call it life lessons. life lesson coming up. next time she sees that chair, she goes oh, i don't know. life lesson. >> greg: it you know, as a kid in the 70s i had that amazing combination of motherhood and alcohol. mom's were great -- by noon they would have their lunch drink. but the food would get a little bit more sloppy. you might find a cigarette in the ravioli. but you know, it was good. mom was pretty fun by 6:00. joe, how are you doing? >> i'm hanging in there, greg. >> greg: are you cold?

>> it's like icicles coming down. >> greg: what did you learn from this research, the survey? what disturbed you, what excited you? >> i didn't learn anything i didn't already know because i remember my guidance counselor in college asked me what i wanted out of college and i said i wanted a college degree. and he got kind of mad. he said well, what are you going to do with that? and i said did you go to college to be a guidance counselor? the whole idea is preposterous. a lot of the other temps were high school grads that just got a temp job and they were getting paid by the company to go to college to get a degree and a job. they were already doing. none of it makes any sense. college is for most agrees a piece of paper. it doesn't really teach you anything you need. it just said hey, i jumped through that hoop. so if you're looking for college to get life skills, that's where they don't call it the real

world. >> greg: college degrees are the original virtue signal. two corporations. now you've got to get a graduate degree, now you need a phd, and your debt just keeps increasing. it's like an arms race between overeducated over caffeinated people. let's go to elvira. how are you doing? [laughter] >> it's not that funny, tyrus. >> it's funny because it didn't happen to me. >> greg: you look stunning in your black dress. >> thanks. you know it's interesting about college students? the people with the least amount of wisdom are the ones that are shouting at us. that is the thing that drives me crazy. i wouldn't mind them admitting that they don't have life skills if they also admitted, don't tell us about what is wrong with this world. but this ignorance of life skills with those arrogant belief that they can yell at us.

i don't know. >> absolutely peer that is always how it is. it is the smallest dog that is the lot is parking. >> greg: is that an attack on me? [laughter] >> to your point, i totally agree. the issue for these kids is either being enabled or an issue of exposure. so either parents in the home or whatever home life they have has enabled the fact that they don't know how to do anything or they weren't exposed to it and they had a different kind of home and they weren't exposed to it in the school systems which is why school choice should come in and having other types of exposure. we think about what our schools are focusing on, right? make sure you have the right pronouns, make sure you understand this until this is how this is oppressive. all these boxes that have to be checked. but along the way, they are probably missing the kids that don't know how to do laundry and don't wash their own clothes or whatever. there's a whole other ton of fundamental issues and it goes up through graduate school. i learned more in my first hearing that i did in my entire criminal law class. i learned more in one hour in a

prison than i did and all years of law school. which is why think -- visiting prisons. i saw your expression. >> did she just say she was on the pen? speak i think every judge, every attorney, every politician, they should all spend one ride on the subway, one hour in prison. it takes a lifetime of these concepts he learned in school to amount to one minute in the real world. i do think the world would be a whole different place of these guys that make decisions for the rest of us would have some of that real-world experience. >> greg: what you are seen as people who have expanse and wisdom should be exposing themselves to children. >> [laughs] that's a felony. >> you drop the one on that one little dog. >> greg: up next -- we got to go. they are yelling at

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♪ ♪ >> greg: the crime rate is all good, until it's in their neighborhood. multiple people were shot on one of the busiest streets, diners scrambled for coverage as they were trying to get a table. the suspects off and the chaotic scene was oliver twitter within minutes. worse, they probably weren't even vaccinated. some of the shooting gets immediate national attention because it hits close to the home of the national media. including guys like her old guy, jim acosta. he was eating dinner at a place just a few blocks away which you probably heard of. >> jim, you happen to be there? what did you see, what did you hear? >> i was having dinner at a restaurant that is very popular in d.c. it is on 14th street and north east washington. >> greg: eggs for the yelp review you arrogant bozo.

unbelievable. get to know people are getting shot near those places. also know to find the closest funeral home. but is not alone. until crime affects you or your family, it doesn't exist. but when it lands on the media's front doorstep, they are all over it. like a baseball game last week. >> i was at the game with my wife and my two kids and we were sitting right down the third base line and middle of the sixth inning, you've heard five, six, seven loud noises paired all of the sudden left field, people just started jumping over their seats and trying to get out. >> greg: you see that trend? cnn only covers crime if it puts it in the center of the action. otherwise, who cares about the other horrifying crimes happening all over like this awful scene in the harlem section of manhattan on thursday. the 61-year-old was attacked on the street by four people and bludgeoned with a cooking pot. they stole her cash, credit

cards, and her walker. quick, someone get a social worker on the phone. you hear about the woman in queens who was busted in a string of hate crimes against asians. she was charged with assault, harassment, and robbery. it's not on the month don't mike wright neighborhood to register. >> you listen to conservative media, you would think that the entire cities are just brawled in fights and fires and whatever. we went out and had a great dinner in new york city tonight. people actually walked up to us and said, thank you for -- i watch every night come i can't believe -- they had to do a double take at us. >> greg: that will never get old for me. when we first saw that, we said basically what he's saying is, i'm only going to notice if it happens where i am eating. and we played that clip over. so now it's happening at ball games and guess what? wait or they are eating.

>> it is happening in the unaffected neighborhoods and it's scary. i'm finally just going to bring it up. you are very quick, smart guy. some would even say genius like with your ability to annoy. and pick out things wrong in situations like a mutant power. but you still don't get what don lemon was saying. people actually walked up to him because they like our show. actually, like, it's really, really happening. they really, really like us. and then cuomo was like, i was there. >> greg: let's get after it. speak about is the real story. but you know, and i joke because i just have to laugh at them, but here's the reality. when i was growing up, we would be playing basketball at the park and any other day on the summertime we would hear a shot and everyone would hit the ground and make sure everybody was okay and then we'd get up to play the game again.

nobody cared what was going on. at night, we had a term. it was called the gato-berg. this was neighborhoods, this was happening all the time. and nobody was running out. now it is happening in their neighborhoods and jim acosta was having dinner at a five-star restaurant. who gives a [bleep] where you were eating. can you report one time in your life -- jim acosta live outside of d.c. assailants unknown, back with more. oh, my god, make the news boring again. it was like yeah, instead it was like i was having a dinner discussing my friends and two shots were fired. although i'm not sure they were russian. chances are they were trump-iean. >> greg: after every crime, the trump will come on say, we are announcing a crackdown on crime. the invocation being, what were

you doing before that? it's like saying, i'm going on a diet. i'm going on a diet now, which implies have been eating like a freak for the last few weeks or four months or ten years. so what are they doing? my point is this. if you can crackdown on crime now, why don't you just do that all the time? >> yeah, that's the whole point. that common sense and reasonable approach to this. this hasn't at all been the platform that these left-wing mirrors have been taking. this comes on the heels of her proposal for the police budget which includes defunding them and triple suspending into what she calls alternative justice and violence. this is because she's talked about the spike in crime on the heels of another spike in crime as being a public health challenge. so that is what these guys -- the numbness to a pit i cannot get over jim acosta reporting peer that was literally atrocious. a quick final point about that woman who went on that antiriot

anti-asian spree. that is the bail reform law in action. it is totally devoid of any common sense of any those of us who do want change in the criminal justice system. none of us can get behind anything like this and it puts the entire movement back ten steps because of these kind of decisions that now absolutely road -- it's ridiculous. >> greg: when i think about it, they announced a crackdown on crime. it reminds me when pilots say, oh, we are going to be -- we took off late, but we are going to catch up in the air. and you go, why can't you just live that way the whole time. i know that logically, but whenever he crackdown, that is what i think. what are your thoughts on this? on how the media covers the stuff? >> i almost feel like i am stupid for not being a criminal. because when i see those people

walking out of t.j.maxx with duffel bags full of merchandise, i'm like, why am i buying these jackets? the only crime i'm guilty of is stealing women's hearts when i zipped this baby up, you know? [applause] and it holds in my fat. tyrus, i had similar trouble on the basketball court. >> you don't say? >> the other team wouldn't guard me. speak i'm just going to spit ball. i'm assuming you're vertical wasn't that great? >> no, i could get massive air, dog. do not leave me open from three-point range. >> you know what, i believe you. >> greg: this is so strange. >> his jacket as zipped up. it can't get normal.

>> greg: it can't get normal. >> whenever this crime happened, the police say the suspects are no strangers to us. there's no accountability that they keep going in and going out. because of the no cash bail. it's not the police's fault, it is the courts now. it's the courts. >> it's the leadership on top of that which is fundamentally unserious. i was there a year ago in d.c. during the riots holding a riot shield. the people that were involved in that -- looting, burning businesses, deployed across the city to supplement the cops. none of them got any consequences. it doesn't matter when it's black on black crime. i'm surprised they didn't name drop. now it's important. >> i have to disagree with you. it is not white supremacy.

it's woke-supremacy. because last time i checked, don lemon was on my side of the fence and he sitting right there with jim acosta zane, look at all this. that is what they will say to argue with you. they are so used to being -- a real thought or an honest answer. their only fight back is, you are a white supremacist. >> greg: up next, get faxed or take

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that is money they will need for expenses when their brains no longer work. but it has a blessing, true. dr. fauci. already predicting what it could mean for the rest of us. >> i think it gives them the impetus to do the same sort of thing. and i think you are going to be seen that there will be mandates, be they from collegesf business that there will be pressures for people to get vaccinated. >> greg: local mandates? next he will have all of us wearing helmets too. meanwhile out of hollywood where everyone is back to wearing masks and not just in bed, sean penn, famous for being one of madonna's ex-husbands, is now a pain in the arm. he refused to returned to his set for "gaslight" until all of the workers get a shot.

he's even offered to put up a on-site clinic. that would mean sean penn returning to work. may be some things are bigger than the pandemic. the end of sean penn's career might be one of them. but it's like a a legendary coach used to say, stop taking pictures of athletes in the locker room. joe, what do you think about these stances? >> i don't care for them. and i just want to point out that i am a comedian. you should listen to my opinion on vaccines if you are not going to buy my homemade antibiotics. >> greg: you can go to the website. anyway, go ahead. >> this all stems from a court case, jacob sin versus massachusetts. they find him basically the equivalent of a speeding ticket. and now that is why they gave him local control of the spirit that is why two weeks to flatten

the curve has become whatever month we are in right now if this. and it is local control, so dr. fauci probably doesn't believe he can make a mandate nationally, so they are doing what they are doing with social media. they are outsourcing it to businesses and peer pressure to make people do what they want. and what i think most people believe should be a personal choice, whether or not they want to get an experimental vaccine. >> greg: that is to repair this might be a very dumb question, but i'm going to ask it anyway. his covid is but it's getting concussed once a month for five years? i find it like -- when you get on the football field, you are taking a pretty big risk. but i got it, we want everybody vaccinated. going to reduce the long haul complications. but anyway. >> because we are on tv right now i hesitate to give my real opinion on that. but the bottom line is that the effects of cte are absolutely catastrophic and especially we

can't even diagnose it until death is yes, absolutely terrifying. first of all, you just illustrated one minute with joe is worth all of law school, right? that was amazing. but i have to say... >> dude, dude, ask her. >> sorry. [laughter] >> you know what man, there we go. >> greg: sorry. she didn't even put the energy for "i'm married" or something. she just said "sorry." ." >> its efficiency. in the nfl example, i have to point out, that rule about how in a forfeiture game no one gets paid. i feel like this is exactly what we are seen in the legal -- this is a novel situation that is trying to shove itself into an existing rubric and also apply new rules. i wonder what the nfl is going

to say about that. i wonder about sean penn situation. will the rider's guild speak up? everyone who comes close to the actors and actresses, but what about -- i don't know and if that's allowed anymore. but what about all of the periphery pits of the riders, the caterers, and what not. they unionized too. >> greg: so sean penn is headlining a series called "gas lit" while he gas lights his crew. i looked it up, it's a form of psychological abuse where a person makes him a question their own sanity. so maybe you have young people or they have a reason why they want to make a personal choice about getting the vaccine or not. and now sean penn rides in and says, and better than all of you. the same thing with the nfl. these are young guys, these are smart guys but they can make decisions for themselves. when you are vaccinated, last time i checked, you are good. i don't understand the obsession with vaccinated everyone else if you are vaccinated yourself when the point is protecting your

life from getting the vaccine -- >> greg: herd immunity is one. >> i don't they have eric count the amount of people who've had covid and therefore have natural immunity. that's a real thing, they never talked about it. that is where you messed up. >> i know this is difficult for you, you are talking about the facts. we are talking about dr. fauci and the cdc. they have lied to us so much. by not just being straight with us and giving americans what we crave more than anything, straight talk. we can take bad news from the doctor, we can take that news from the lawyer. he took bad news from an anomaly. and i'm so proud of him. i zipped up out of respect. but the point is, one of the things that we were told a million times over was that young, and shape americans had little or nothing to fear and that we had to make sure to protect our old and protector on healthy and pre-existing

conditions, et cetera, et cetera. but the me politicized it because it was getting done at a high level during a monstrous administration creates we have to have a problem with it. now it does become politicized and it's your only key to reelection. you are going to attack the nfl and go after players who are in the best physical shape a human being could possibly be in. and saying that they don't get a vaccine not only will they not get paid but they will have to forfeit. >> greg: we got to move on. why is the

this is my third "live" concert this month. the energy is insane. the crowd, pumped. look, i haven't seen a show in a year.

because the more we're indoors together, the more covid spreads. and, until i'm vaccinated, masks help slow the spread. which means the sooner we can go to concerts, like real ones. - can you turn it down babe? - of course, sweetheart. so mask up. not for me, for the music.

♪ ♪ >> greg: well, a candidates rage keeping voters engaged pete .researchers show voters from across the political spectrum fake news stories from phony candidates, which is an awful like cnn's coverage of joe biden. am i right?

participants reported that a candidate that showed anger increase the likelihood that they would attend rallies or votes on election day. researchers warned that making supporters angry works in the short-term, but as the negative long-term consequences of making everyone hate each other. voter i.d. laws are the worst things with the civil war could leave two of silverware. which is awesome, because i love sequels, emily. you often curse around the office, your reputation is that you are just mean to everybody. beneath you. so has that helped you and your success? >> fake news while we're on the subject of sequels, really excited for top gun 2. so here's the thing that stood up to me about this whole study is that it also says that people started to me at the anger they saw these politicians and that political angry rhetoric started to spread. which is what we know, and spite easily. this is exactly what we talk about all the time, which is that the media stokes the fire.

in fact, they are the incendiary, they are the beginning of it, they are the spark that they then continue to amplify. i get that the main point is it will drive to voter games on voting day, but in the interim it's making a whole lot of us pretty miserable. >> amen. tyrus? >> yeah, well, i agree. what -- of course we like angry politicians. because everything we see on the media is angry. and it's either you are either on their side are you are horrible racist misogynistic person. so politicians, they watch the news, they see what is going on, and then whatever is in their lane -- be as mad as i am. but it works for a while, but then they don't ever want to do with the media. and politicians never have to do with the consequences of telling

real people who are living in this consequences how angry they should be and they never ever have a solution. there's no consequences for politicians and news media and that's why it was like, we need to start making them responsible. qualified immunity should not go to politicians bear they should be responsible for the [bleep] they put out. >> so should news networks. to speak at one >> cnn ran for years on rage. now that they don't have the rage, we know where their ratings are. >> you are telling them there's nothing there can do. and instead of saying, wow, i think we went too far. it is, there's nothing to see her. everything's fine. >> greg: i'm surprised about the study because it was conducted in minnesota where i have yet to meet an angry person. they are all passive-aggressive. that was the angry response bid i will say something comes full

circle because barack obama loved -- he ran on an aspirational message. there is a cycle and that comes back. >> greg: trump didn't make you angry, he made you laugh at the people who were angry. it's the happy warrior that i think we all like. often like joe. joe, i gather being cool,, and smooth is of more persuasive tactic. >> i think revenge is like cold pizza. it's best served cold. >> but yeah, i don't look at people who disagree with me is necessarily bad people. i just think that they are stupid people that i have to persuade. >> and on that note -- go up

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>> greg: welcome back but let's see if we got anything wrong this week. for that, we go to delma. steve, how did i do? flawless as usual? >> not even close, greg. in fact, let's go to tuesday and start off with one of your favorite subjects, sphincters. >> you don't need a silver fork to eat good food. all you need is rice, beans, and a very strong sphincter. it's true.

one of the few muscles you can control. >> greg, that is not true. your body consists of skeletal, smooth, and cardiac muscles. skeletal is the stuff you can control. so think fingers, biceps, facial muscles. forget that last group if you are nancy pelosi. so it's more than just a few. it's more than just a few like you said. however, you are partially right. you are actually sitting on two types of sphincters. which i'm sure you're thrilled about. i believe you are referring to the external sphincter, which is under conscious control. the internal was involuntary smooth muscle and like your intestines, you can't control that. so if you could only learn to control your mouth, you might make fewer mistakes. >> greg: says the guy who is running on right now. >> how dare you serve. you paid me to be here. i'm doing my job. but we do have to move on. emily, how are you? emily, this one is for you and greg. but let's hear emily what you

said last night about eric laughed and refusing to play concerts where proof of vaccination was required for attendance. mike, roll it. >> i think that this makes him a rock star. and also a rock star. here's the thing, he's taking a stand against the establishment. and to your point, for once someone stood up to what they believe. >> i assume you know who we has a question mark >> i know who he is too. >> first, emily, i'm just disappointed. you say standing up for himself makes him a rock star. eric clapton has been a literal rock star since the 1960s. he's been in the rock & roll hall of fame three times. speak i know. i was just saying it like -- that's what makes him really a rock star. >> i totally understand what emily was saying. >> saint he was a cool rock star as opposed to a growing rock star like a neil diamond to someone like that. >> greg: how dare you, sir! >> eric clapton by the way did

not write the song "cocaine" it was written and recorded by j.j. cale in 1976. eric clapton released a cover version the following year. >> greg: i was high on coke during that time. >> you and everybody else involved in those recordings. i read, we've got to get going. tyrus, how are you? >> i'm well, how are you? >> i'm wearing a bow tie. you are saying joe is wearing a jacket zipped all the way up like a guy who knows stuff. it was wondering if you tell us what that means exactly. >> it's between me and joe and guys with with zipped up jackets. >> anything to add? >> no. >> don't tell them nothing, joe. don't do it. jo. >> i didn't hear nothing. >> it sounds like their lips are sealed as their jackets. that is all the time i've got.

goodbye. >> stay right there, we will be right back. ♪ ♪

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>> greg: we are out of time. has plus demanded. >> neil: thank you, wow. ♪ ♪ >> jesse: hello, everybody i'm just jesse watters, dagen mcdowell, greg gutfeld, and this is "the five." president biden's back yard looking like a war zone. again two people wounded after gunmen sprayed bullets in a crowded d.c. neighborhood.