of evangelical rule over us, it talibanism. >> katie: you think the media could get any more deranged. tell eventism. that's all we have for tonight, i'm katie pavlich and for laura ingraham. the giver watching the special edition of "the ingraham angle." i'll be on the big saturday and sunday show. greg gutfeld take it from here. ♪ ♪ [cheers and applause] >> greg: happy friday, everyone! oh, man, and we have a great show! janice dean is back! [cheers and applause] let's go to the president of her fan club for comments. >> icu. i appreciate you. i thank you.

>> greg: we think you two. what a shame impaled on his own giant q-tip. i don't think i read that correctly. and i'm sure he will add onto his speech. i'm sure someone will lend him a helping hand after he lent her groping want to sew my name. now we have time to hang out with matt lauer and charlie rose. but be careful when you hang out with charlie rose. he really wants to hang out. in case you forgot. he would never close his robe. guess what, it is time for everything is racist! so true, tonight a tale of two cokes. if two elections. as you know there's a recall going on in california except the recall is in for defective airbags. it's for a defective windbag. namely his royal haircut, gavin newsom. it appears the person who has the biggest chance of winning is

larry elder. oh, look, he's black. what's the "l.a. times" claiming is causing the recall? racism. do i have this right? a privileged white male governor who is as i think is cauliflower pizza crust is being recalled and the possible replacement is a black man. that sounds about as racist as a episode of "what's happening." here's a tip, it might be faster if you just published a list of things that aren't racist. the reason for the recall isn't rampant crime, untreated mental illness, or homelessness, or the kardashians, it's not that californians can get water or go outside, not high taxes. it's racism. he claims its white supremacy that led to the recall in california, one of the most liberal states in the nation. next they will blame all the forest fires on burning crosses. their logic it's the racists who are paid in california as the

hotbed of crime. those things are real, just propaganda for some amorphous band of bigots. makes me wonder if the people who write for the "l.a. times" have ever been to california. have they been downtown near the overpasses or walk the beach is? it's what supremacists sleeping on the benches, littering the boardwalks with syringes. the elites would know this if they ever stepped outside of their gated communities and mansions. and saw how real people suffer from the policies they promote. what supremacists are as rail in california as the celebrities who bathe. but, dan, there was a way to refute the claim. what if the leading role republican challenger was black? that's too crazy, nobody would believe that. but there it is, that guy is larry elder, the black man who earlier had been called the black face of white supremacy by

another columnist. if that's true? he's been a black face for almost 70 years. that kind of commitment would make rachel jealous. if you said those things about the democratic candidate who happened to be black and canceled faster than the cosby show rerun. they are making the argument larry elder isn't really black because for democrats, blacks are great until you challenge the democrats. it's about the content of your character and you only have character if you stayed on their plantation. meanwhile, the other side of the country, there is another election. may be some hope for a cleaned up new york city. right now the city's experience its own renaissance of recklessness. i never thought i would see the day when a crazed man attacks a car with a spatula. but that indeed happen here in the city. first we are getting carjacked and now we are getting flapjack. i'm not sure if i should call the cops or ihop.

the dude was beaten by a mob but this is what happens when d.a. start waffling. curtis leaves running for mayor and he seems to actually give a damn about the people living on the street. on the streets at the hampton at the first time and trouble, it made the round and worth showing my watch and learn. >> yo, what's up man? how long you lift in? >> six years. six years. >> all right, where? are you supposed to be on medication? it's okay, it's okay, it's okay.

it's all right. we'll take care of you. >> i just don't want to take advantage of you guys. >> you're not taking advantage, you're my responsibility. i'm running for mayor, i'm going to make sure you and your other friends out here taking care of. >> greg: that's pretty moving stuff. ignore the left you screaming it was staged. as of aoc's whole life isn't one big follow-up. but that's really what's missing from the left, compassion along with logic, reason, and truth. at the left pretend the policies help those less fortunate, a stroll down the street in the major blue city proves otherwise. if we see the consequences and most of them are asking you if you could spare any change in sticking a gun in your face are showing their junk. those are just the democratic mayors. people like that disturb the man suffer on the sidewalks of new york, l.a., atlanta, san fran, seattle, and anywhere

else where there is no opposition to the rise of the hard left. if you see the consequences of one party rule. not a republican insight and that's what's happens when you've got no competition. ruined. of real sensible democrats should be for stuff. without loyal opposition, their party will turn into a motley bunch of woke them up brain, militia zombies. not like the republicans are saviors by any means, you need at least two parties to keep each other from destroying themselves. it's time to do something to work and turn the tide. if more than one guardian angel to defeat a bunch of marxist devils and save those two state. it's what to take a rebirth of republicanism. too bad they're all moving to texas. [cheers and applause] let's welcome today's forecast, she's kicking some -- fox news senior meteorologist, janice dean! he's had more rolls than brian stelter on thanksgiving.

author of the new book "the respondent" actor greg ellis! she's like your favorite sweater -- soft, warm, and riddled with moths. fox news contributor, kat timpf! and finally, his style of comedy is no laughing matter. writer and comedian, joe machi! all right i'm going to the only person here that still living in california, greg. do you think larry elder is a sneaky white supremacist? >> let me get this straight, the white man is saying that the black man is the black face of white supremacy? >> greg: yes! >> okay, guy from compton, having lived -- it's like he's been drinking the woke cola for too long. if i'm against -- i want the recall to happen.

i don't think it carries on him. he has decimated california. it's like this, likely seen see them from companies living in this era where woke capitalism, where companies sell products to people who pretend to hate a social justice -- it's like communism, capitalism. gavin, look, he's a pretty fellow, good looking chap. not doing him very well. larry looks like he really mixes them up. >> greg: i noticed it better. better gavin hair looks, it's like remember the picture of dorian gray was not a movie or book, did i dream that? all right, that's the point i'm trying to make. but his hair stays the same, but

the state like the picture in the attic. >> is that dorian gray? >> greg: there is a picture in the attic. what's wrong with you, janet? >> they are grasping at straws now. >> greg: there is no more straws. >> how about he's just a terrible governor? i think they need a meteorologist in california. >> greg: when i was going to ask you, i don't know if curtis lee has a chance for a mayor, but you know, you've been a meteorologist for a long time. isn't it time you enter the political realm and run for mayor? >> come on. would you vote for me? >> greg: who wouldn't vote for you? hello, andrew cuomo would vote for yo. >> i don't take about that. i will say, i heard that bill de blasio was taking about running for governor today. we are in trouble. in trouble here in new york city but i'll let you know.

the winds are changing. it's me when i will help write your speech is. >> than i'm going to win. there you go. this bill and that's the exact kind of answer, the perfect vision. not literally, don't want to get in trouble with hr. good to see you stop by the footlocker, joe. or old navy? >> i don't know the brand, i don't pay attention to labels unlike the democrats in california. i find personally you would catch a label for something and then people will stop thinking and buy, that's what nike is producing. i think that's what happens here in california. what they are saying doesn't make sense. gavin newsom had an odd or as a pet. >> greg: really? >> i'll tell you what, most white people didn't have auditors as a pet growing up. i didn't have a pet, i pretended

that stray cats love to me. much like cannibals pretend. >> greg: by the way, auditors are more appealing than cats, right >> now you're going to make me upset. >> just a friendly joke, i love pets. >> i thought of violence. >> greg: speaking of cats, how many cats does curtis lee will have? >> 17 right? >> greg: 17, he lives in a studio apartment 400 square feet with 17 cats. i learned to because he's on the show. i love this guy, but that is crazy. crazy. i didn't mean crazy, i'm a doctor as you know, neurology. kat. that's what i say in my van. what are your thoughts about how it's not like of water, lack of power, it's not a mental

illness, its white racism that's at the root of these problems? >> i looked at the article and evaluated it if it were a research paper, which now just makes twice -- i'll use my english degree. probably the only two times. it just doesn't add up, obviously, there is no evidence to back that conclusion, because really most of the article says people are upset about the rampant homelessness. a lot of people who are homeless are people of color, therefore you're a racist like awaits, so if you don't want people of color to be homeless, that's racist? thanks actually backwards, but that's what happens when you stop thinking. >> greg: the governor has not talked to anybody that he has been -- doesn't know anything about the homeless or the drug addicted, the mentally ill. i'm not even sure he knew some. that was a long way for probably the worst joke ever, ever made.

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>> greg: heading to the beach to relax? not if you didn't get your facts. cdc recommending you nick's all your travel plans to stay home this labor day weekend if you're not vaccinated. even if you have gotten the shot, make sure to pack extra masks because they said so. >> in a public indoor setting please wear a mask. vaccinated order unvaccinated. as i said before, they're not forever but there for now. >> greg: masks are in forever, but they are for now. it sounds like something kay jewelers would say if your fiance --

[laughter] i didn't even finish the joke! did i even try? all right. it sounds like something kay jewelers would say if your fiance was unattractive. [cheers and applause] thank you. and who will decide when we no longer need masks? dr. fauci? he went from saying no masks to wrap your head in the duvet cover. he's now saying three shots will likely be the new norm for full vaccination. what's next? four, five? the upside is it's the only way young children are being taught to count. [laughter] meanwhile, in australia the birthplace of freckles, they've been going absolutely nuts trying to get covid under control. in their latest effort to eradicate the virus, aussies are being forced to use a app with facial recognition software and geolocation to prove they are actually quarantining for 14 days after traveling within the

country. the applicant randomly context people and asked them to provide proof of their location in 15 minutes. it's like a goober rivers. the aclu proves once again they don't understand what they stand for. they say they're a justifiable intrusion on bodily integrity. it means the constitutions as meaningless as a receipt from cvs. they should change the initial freckles from aclu to ob ey. you know what, i don't need your courtesy applause. this isn't seth myers. [laughter] >> yes, yes! what [applause] >> greg: it took me a while to remember his name.

joe, what's your three day and we can look like? >> i have not got invited to anything. i'm going to avoid the traffic. stay local. >> greg: if you had plans, would you heed the cdc? >> either been paying attention to them for a while, because to me it seems that they believe that they are doing the same thing over and over again, expecting a different result. it's the definition of insanity. it doesn't make it sense to me, that's why you don't have to wear a mask and the vaccine, you have to wear a mask come in two weeks. three vaccines, nine months, five months, it's hard to keep up and it changes day-to-day. day-to-day. >> greg: that's so true. kat, you're obviously a famous libertarian. there's only like three of them. how do you feel about the aclu? >> it's super disappointing because i'm somebody who is pro-vaccine but anti-mandate.

the way that i reached this set of beliefs by researching the vaccine and the benefits versus risks, also being not literally a communist. if you do not own your body, you can't say you're a member of society. at all. also i do not ever trust anybody just for now but not forever. if spielman especially relationship. >> you can come to my apartment someday, they become a two years later. i've no idea how him and the probably secret family are doing. [laughter] >> greg: i wish i had a secret family. what are you for casting, will people follow cdc guidelines? >> it's crazy, they did everything they told me to. if my kid has to get vaccinated to go to school, will have to do that, but site for casting a storm. i tear you to man-to-man tell you where the store is going to go, that i do make

you back but you decide what you're going to do with that information. >> greg: that's a wonderful analogy for my next mayor. you're from england, greg, so let's talk about australia. >> okay, make them a let's do it. >> greg: australia is invalid if you dropped england on the floor >> i think it was the criminals, on the ships that went to. >> greg: yeah, it was a colony. >> you look at the internment camps, it's really cheery. it was lots of these -- it's going to 14 days quarantine in the internment camps. >> greg: by the way, penal colony, it's not as fun as it sounds. [laughter] by the way, my whole weekend is a mandate. greg, i was brought up to believe that australia was a bad

country home of crocodiles and mel gibson, and bell gibson, and crocodiles. >> and martial law apparently. troops on the street, stuck in their homes, another lockdown, we see what's happening in new zealand as well. that's kind of the same, in the u.k., it's not there as well. >> greg: what is due lally? >> leica picnic, it's crazy. >> greg: it's nuts, it's how authoritarianism can creep up, if you give population a choice. >> the aclu, apparently they are suing south carolina about mask mandates. hang on a second. we are suing because of mask mandates that women should have control in texas? global standards right? >> it makes absolutely no sense. but again, you know, we're talking about australia.

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one pill, once-daily. #1 prescribed for td. learn how you could pay as little as $0 at ingrezza.com ♪ ♪ >> greg: is there rejuvenation and abomination, that's a rhyme, kat? as part of what they're calling a national rejuvenation with sounds like a socialist skincare regiment, regime, china is cracking down on video games. seliger and a fandom, top actresses , and effeminate men. coincidentally, that's the last four entries of my internet search history. chinese president has called for a tighter party control across several areas so australia doesn't feel left out. minors are now banned from online gaming on school days and are limited to one hour a day on weekends and holiday evenings.

that's how the state media slammed online games spiritual opium. or perhaps in honor of the friend hunter biden. meanwhile, their reading and celebrity worship and online fan clubs including banning the ranking of celebrities by popularity. they scrubbed this list from the internet. [laughter] [applause] thank you. finally, and this is the one that bothers me the most because i myself am delicate and delicate hands. china has banned effeminate men from appearing on tv. it promotes revolutionary culture and resolutely put an end to cc men, not my term, and other abnormal aesthetics. apparently people worry that south korean and japanese pop stars are encouraging chinese men to not become from masculine off. if you want young men to be

inspired to become more manly, show them this. ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ my hands already got larger and just that. janice, could this be your game crackdown actually be a good thing long-term? >> can you replay what you just -- i've never seen that before. it's not -- >> the faces he makes. >> that's part of a show? >> greg: i told him when he was doing his show to stop dancing when you leave the segment to the music because it's so grungy and he doesn't listen. i decided to make a montage out of it and force them to stop.

>> that's going to be on fire on the internet. >> greg: that's a second time i played it. i try to play it at least once a week, sometimes when i'm alone. >> i feel bad for china not being able to see that. >> greg: there cracking down on everything but that video. >> that i'll be okay. it'll last them a lifetime. >> greg: that's true. >> i feel this is terrible. they're not going to be a watch the show and of course poor timing because abba came out with a brand-new album. right? am i the only one who loves abba? >> greg: i love palindromes so i guess i do love abba. [laughter] joe, joe, joe, there has to be some part of the story that's intimately resonating with io? >> this is a chance for me to show my value for those different than myself. i mean, i have a much toxic masculinity coursing through my

veins as a steroid user while having. but i think, i value the rights of people different for me i hate the bachelor but i don't think it's fans should be rounded up. >> thank you. >> greg: what do you think about them cracking down on bands? i mean, they do not want any distraction to the greater mission. >> fans, sissy men? sissy men? i'm glad it's not here in america because where i am in california, gavin newsom's cap pain would collapse in the mainstream media. in all seriousness i think it's good for boys and youngsters did not spend so much time online. online video games, get outside, whether it be for the good of the people. i think it's a good thing, but this is a men thing, i mean, you

and me, we can dance. >> greg: you don't even know his name was to which is hilarious. at that's going to pits off jesse even more. you don't know his name. >> jesse and i go way back. of we danced up a storm back in the day. he was my get dance partner. moving on. >> greg: kat. >> hey! >> greg: you're kind of a fan boy, right? really, you're an intense fan of things. >> yeah. i'm not a boy though. >> greg: you know what i mean. >> and casey you didn't know that. yeah, this is not good to be popular with the audience and it's going to be very controversial. i would not want to live in a place with andre queens. i'm serious, yes, you cry on a regular bar, you're reared, you cry in a drag bar, they're going to tell you you're beautiful and

that you're perfect just the way you are, honey, you walk out of there feeling yourself. >> greg: that's true. a feeling other. >> greg: i cry at all the time. >> i've never cried at a bar. of >> greg: should try it. coming up, should you become a mick fleury order because thea. machines are always out of order? ♪ ♪ but when the twitching and jerking in my face and hands affected my day to day... i finally had to say, 'it's not ok.' it was time to talk to my doctor about austedo. she said that austedo helps reduce td movements in adults... while i continue with most of my mental health medications. (vo) austedo can cause depression, suicidal thoughts, or actions in patients with huntington's disease. pay close attention to and call your doctor if you become depressed, have sudden changes in mood, behaviors, feelings, or have suicidal thoughts. common side effects include inflammation of the nose and throat, insomnia and sleepiness.

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machine seems to be broken all the time. this could be the biggest corporate scandal since the bank bailouts. the investigation that's a job lead people up and flabby arms. the issues apparently gotten more attention since the website called nick broken started tracking the status of machines around the country. this morning, more than 11% of them were down. if the trend worsens, people might lose weight. [laughter] some speculate the problem is employees not letting the machines heat up enough before cleaning them. others suggest a darker, more sinister reason for the broken machines. in an act of corporate terrorism on behalf of the lactose intolerance. for more, we go to account for comment. >> why don't they use chicken milk for the deserts? is that even possible? now they'll blame me for covid.

shut out to greg ellis, i love doing "pirates of the caribbean." [laughter] >> greg: you've got to fan out there in the pasture, greg. >> what can i say? should i speak like that like i'm scottish? everything in front like mcflurry, broken mick broken, gutfeld, when did that become a thing? >> greg: it's so true! we are putting mc in front of everything. that's not a bad, i didn't mean to say what you thought i'd say. >> this matter, that's all it takes. >> greg: cancel me immediately, take me out of context! janice, have you experienced this? >> i don't want to experience this. it's terrible. we've had hurricanes, covid, afghanistan, now the machines are breaking ice cream? >> greg: this is like the terminator. >> don't tell me the flurry machines are breaking too. >> greg: when i get cream

headaches. this is the deal, this is the reason why it's happening, kat, cody rigsby on palatine east to work the drive through at mcdonald's he said after you clean the machines, you tell everybody it's broken so you do not have to clean it again. >> i said this last night! yes, it's not broken, it's that you're at work and i worked in many restaurants, not to brag. before you can go home, you have to do all the assigned work in all these things and that's a little bit slow, you get started cleaning the thing and you can go home right at closing. if you get done cleaning the machine, somebody comes in right before you close and they want ice cream. if you're not going to give them a ice cream to clean again, you've got to go to the bar. it's broken. >> greg: i used to have to clean the targets at albertson. >> i had to do it at boston market. >> greg: i was the biggest culprit in making them dirty. it was basically -- albertsons,

yeah, the supermarket. they had a bathroom in the back and not a lot of people knew that because you don't want to tell everybody, especially the albertson near the fairgrounds. >> you have to have a kia, you have to have a bouncer. >> greg: the carnies, this weird [bleep] bathroom, i'm not talking about like taking up a leap, weird stuff. you were a carnet, joe. >> no, i was not a carnet. [laughter] but i've worked restaurants and a lot of what you do is trying to come up for reasons why you don't have to work. next week, i have a repair man coming the same day. >> greg: when you're not sure what it's going to be? >> no, not yet, but i'll ask janice later. >> will keep in touch. they would say the machines in touch, and just give me a chance. i object the notion that mcflurry's are unhealthy because i'll tell you what, when i'm

eating one my heart rate starts to pound and i start sweating. it's the same as running a marathon. is this ice cream? >> yeah. >> it should be a national order. it's a good, strong use of taxpayer money. if it was the british version, you brew a cup of tea, they'd be storming the streets. if i'm not why it's front page. it is a mcflurry? >> greg: i love the fact he didn't read the story. the ice cream machines are broken. ice cream machines. mcdonald's with the crazy scary cloudy. >> we all want to buy the food and eat with ed. >> we won't go there. >> do you have to clean them? >> greg: when you have to clean them! it's just ice cream! >> you do have to clean -- >> greg: stop cleaning the

machine. >> i love it's a big priority. >> greg: went all right, we've got more. up next, a friday treat with jokes and -- ♪ ♪ shingles doesn't care. i stay within my family bubble. shingles doesn't care. because if you've had chicken pox, you're already carrying the virus that causes shingles. in fact, about 1 in 3 people will develop shingles, and the risk only increases as you age. so what can protect you against shingles? shingrix protects. now you can protect yourself from shingles with a vaccine proven to be over 90% effective. shingrix is a vaccine used to prevent shingles in adults 50 years and older. shingrix does not protect everyone and is not for those with severe allergic reactions to its ingredients or to a previous dose. an increased risk of guillain-barré syndrome was observed after vaccination with shingrix. the most common side effects are pain, redness, and swelling at the injection site, muscle pain, tiredness, headache,

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♪ ♪ >> greg: we cover a lot every

week and somet sometimes not alf our beautiful jokes make it in. but lucky you will come of those strokes get a second chance right here in their own segment. ime once again for -- ♪ ♪ "greg is greg's leftovers." >> greg: leftovers sometimes there go to, sometimes not so much but you never know until you chow down. here we go. rolling stones drummer charlie watson died at age 80 making him the second most unhealthy person in the band. [laughs] 27 sacramento schoolchildren are still in afghanistan. if their departure was delayed because some of the kids wanted to spend their last day of vacation at six flags over kabul. but vp kamala harris gave her a word that the moment those kids get back to the u.s., they'll be arrested. that's why that didn't happen.

kamala harris has been hard to find lately, critics are saying it's to prevent the popular vp from making the president look bad. supporters condemn biden doesn't need help looking bad. has anybody check your affair has it she still not been there yet? joe biden con checking his watch checking in the ceremony for fallen troops. the reports are saying he was just checking to make sure he had time for his fourth and fifth naps. biden was stunned by the video, he was also stunned to learn the woman standing next to him is his wife. elites called transcripts showed then president to improve the optics against the taliban, but it's hard to do that and also fill helicopters with money. yeah, there you go.

former conservative wrote an op-ed blaming the afghan withdrawal on the american people instead of joe biden. you'll notice he's a hack to cover up where his brain was removed. mike richards making obnoxious comments on a podcast and nobody accepted his apology because it was not in the form of a question. [laughter] workings the new dating trend of secretly seeing other people. it remind us of when kat was dating and boyfriends checked in, but they didn't check out. a who flushes kids at the near bicycle keeps getting released a jail. but that's what happens when anthony weiner's wi-fi goes down. they have no choice to release him. he's avoided jail times but he's been banned from posting any sport shows on cnn.

joe biden plans to spend the week and back home in delaware, the sixth time use vacations since his inauguration, nearly one person for every time his dog has attacked. his dog shown more aggression than general milley. [laughter] [applause] biden has been in delaware for days, but you think he's in afghanistan, but that should count for something. twitter's new safety mode, twitters can block any criticism or unwanted interactions. the developers claim it's just like a joe biden press conference. [laughs] the twitter allows you to lament unwelcome indirection. i have a similar feature on my devices. it's called the on off switch. new york democrat candidate for city council wants to put victims in charge of rehabilitating violent criminals, rather than prison. other ideas include using enormous hydrogen filled balloons to transport people.

that might have been the hindenburg. many americans have put on weight during the pandemic and worry they will be unrecognizable when they returned to work. it's the news that inspired andrew cuomo to eat a family size lasagna. so he would be unrecognizable. swimmers are being worn to avoid waters off england where there is apparently a confused dolphin. melissa is asking us to withhold judgment unless we know he's a democrat. dolphins can become very amorous when they interact with humans. but the only dolphin i ever swam with told me he just liked me as a friend buried a new study sayn find men who mumble our more attractive. really good news for bob dylan. as for the reaction to the study, most men but at some thing under their breath and

wandered off. it numbs a courtesy left, janice. in the afghan interpreter who say president biden is now stranded there. the white house spokesman said the translators departure has been related to my delight but reassured it reporters the man has been mailed his absentee ballot for the 2024 election. americans are stocking up on toilet paper. they plan to take this sitting down. the anticipation of short issues, keeping the houses this hollowing. with a toilet paper shortage lumen, the cdc plans to a new subsidy to get new fiber into our diet. and that a perfect ending. [laughter] [cheers and applause] i think they batted about .300,

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astrazeneca may be able to help. ♪ ♪ >> greg: before we go, a quick reminder that ♪ ♪ animals are jerks, animals are jerks. >> greg: check out this jerk of a dog. it's like a crusher. you know, look at that. demanding full attention because he deserves the attention. doesn't want you on your phone. isn't that great? there something about the phone that bothers him. hit it again. maybe he's calling another dog and he knows it? yeah, i need to see your phone and see who you're talking to. is it spot? that's why --

♪ ♪ animals are jerks. animals are jerks. >> greg: set your dvr every night so you never miss an episode! thank you to janice dean, greg ellis, joe mackie, kat timpf, our studio audience, fox news at night when shannon bream is next! i'm greg gutfeld, and i love you, america! ♪ ♪ >> hello, welcome to fox news that night, i am shannon bream. breaking tonight, a texas judge siding with planned parenthood. was a blower lawsuits under the new law. it all comes after president joe biden called the texas law

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