tv Gutfeld FOX News April 4, 2022 8:00pm-9:00pm PDT
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don't come hug us if you see us on the street. >> laura: that was very genuine, i think, national hug a newsperson day. ok. didn't 90 know that was a thing. -- didn't know that was a thing. all the proceeds for the month will be donated to the special opts warrior foundation. amazing organization. "gutfeld" is next. >> this is a fox news alert, i'm live in lvyv. global outrage over the mass killings on buchya on the outskirts of kyiv. in a late-night speech, zelensky stressed the importance of seeking justice. >> necessary jurisdictional basis is being provided to bring culpable russian troops to justice for every committed
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west of mar iupol. shelling destroyed most infrastructure there. stay tuned to fox news for the latest out of ukraine. griff jenkins live out of lviv. now to "gutfeld." >> greg: hello there. happy monday, everyone. thanks for not watching that game. it's stupid. hope you had a pleasant weekend. i know i did, and even better, there were no witnesses. what happens when someone admits to wrongdoing years after the wrongdoing has been committed? for me, it was getting the menudo tattoo removed, but i wonder, does a confession happen because the guilt became too much or did they realize their confession carries no real consequence? they get to have their cake and eat it, too, or in brian's case, two cakes and a bucket of corn dogs.
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so easy. so cheap, but so true. all right, speak of the tsunami of people now admitting media covered up under biden's laptop. after two years as joe as president, people are admitting what we knew all along. >> huntedder biden, i'm sorry. you made a living who was taking money just because you were the vice president's son. you had influence. you had $4.8 million from chinese energy companies. it looks like the left wing maybe just buried the story because it wasn't part of their narrative and that's why people don't trust the media. >> greg: it looks like it. it's also like he's -- dare i say -- woke but this a good way. credit him. when he's right. he's right. even "the washington post" is owning up claiming the hunter story is an opportunity to reckoning. that doesn't even include the millions he spent on hookers or kung pao chicken. if hunter worked any harder for
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the chinese, he'd spend his weekends sewing nikes. but while "the post" admits biden family prompted by trading with his name overseas, it's like biden didn't act incorruptly. his son suddenly earning millions is something he wouldn't notice? like the growing stain on the front of his trousers? "the post" asked the dumbest question of the yea. why is confirmation of a story that surfaced in the fall of 2020 emerging only now? well, gee whiz, post, why don't you ask your own news bureau? the press asking why the story is only emerging now. it's like o.j. simpson just asking what happened to his ex-wife nicole or scott petersen putting up missing posters of his wife all around the neighborhood. your hands were all over this. "the washington post" then noted that after the "new york post" published the blockbuster piece, "twitter blocked a story
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altogether, suspended the "new york post's" account for sharing store thefully the algorithms that governor users' news feeds." thank you, we knew. the culprits were sipping lattes in silicon valley. now "the washington post" and the "new york times" vouched for many of the e-mails and cited the prompted allegations of the cover-up or if that's a double standard in the treatment of conservative and liberal politician business mainstream media and social media sites. well, hello there, sleepy heads. did you have a nice nap? of course, whopo offers a lame defense saying we've all been unwitting tools of russian influence so it was only true to suspect of a similar plot here. the editors weren't unwitting, they were just a bunch of tools. i don't remember them being prudent about the other phony plots. they were only prudent about one real one and they conclude with the solemn idiocy. the lesson learned from 2016 was
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to heir on the side of setting aside questionable material in the heat of the political campaign. lesson learned from 2020 may well be there's also a danger of suppressing accurate and relevant stories. do you see what they did there? it was important to bury it then but it's not to bury it now which means it's time for "greg's super dulllex double whammy conspiracy here to with 90% more conspiracy and more tinfoil." the media amits to the laptop now and not them. why? the dems got in. they won. like paying a small fine for behavior that paid you millions. with biden, that's only worth thousands. could to be the media knows indictments are coming down so why not speed it up and get it over with away from 2024 while joe is still in power so it's easy for him to pardon his son and maybe his brother before joe is wheeled off on a two-wheel
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hand truck like hannibal lector? then the deems could replace him with a candidate who doesn't need a cheat sheet to tell you his address. i wonder what joe has to say. >> no. no. no. come on, man. look, there's no lying anymore. it's just we updated you. that's all. we said the story wasn't true. now we say it's true. we updated it. that's all. like an old phone or computer, you have to give it an update or your house u do a makeover. you have to update it. this works great, man. like when i said that putin needed to be removed from power. no. no. someone else came out and said, no, they gave an update. that's not true. then you asked me about it and i said, no, you have to go by the update. this update thing, i love it. it works great. you know what else i love? ice cream. >> greg: who doesn't? go ahead and laugh but the joke's on us. we knew the laptop was real but were punished for saying it and not the good kind of punishment that involves a safe word.
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don't buy this act of contrition. the media never admits to anything unless they're planning to do something worse. let's welcome tonight's guests. his tv shows inspired americans to do more reading. founder of the loftist party dot-com, michael loftist. she's mon conservative than a turtleneck wearing another turtleneck, fox news contributor tammy bruce. and he's more ripped than a grocery bag in the rain, retired u.s. marine corps, bomb technician and fox news contributor, johnnie joey joe. and she's like barbed wire, skinny, sharp and a lot of felons can't seem to get over her, fox news contributor kat. how are you doing over there? >> i'm hanging in. feeling good. >> greg: barely, you have no excuse to feel good but ok. i don't see why.
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it seems like it would go against the evidence of your physical -- >> those are allegations. allegations. >> greg: i just go by how you look, and you look terrible. no, i'm kidding. jessie waters of all people made a good point on "the five" saying that the "washington post" authenticated every single e-mail except the stuff that mentioned joe. like, what are the odds of that? they walked in -- they completely walked around that. what do you make of the timing? >> well, the timing is so they can look back trump said
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don't trust the media. it's really low among americans overall and independents because they still don't get it. i don't think they want to get it, because sometimes understanding things could be painful. >> think about how many hunter laptops metaphorically are representative of stories we never heard that are out there that have cost lives, yes, that have been covered up because, you know, it would have hurt, you know, a clinton, you know, or anybody for that matter, you know? >> i want public firing . >> greg: hm. you know what? you're fired, michael. to start that off. >> i didn't lie about that! i didn't do it. >> greg: i'm firing you for the jacket. up next, jack from twitter shows some guilt for the social media monster he built. that's the next story, everybody. isn't that exciting? ♪ ♪simply irresistible♪ applebee's irresist-a-bowls are back.
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>> greg: oh look, there you are. said by a billionaire on twitter. jack dorsey says he's got a few regrets, "the days of ric, the web, even e-mail were amazing. i realize i'm partially to blame. i regret it." so i don't know what he said. >> i don't understand either. >> greg: i don't either, so let's move on. apparently dorsey who left twitter last year was limiting how the internet changed from the early days, back when it was an exciting thing. enter elon musk. after criticizing twitter's lack of commitment to free speech on twitter, the billionaire bought 9% in the company that he just craped on.
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makes him twitter's largest shareholder that's actually worth nearly $3 billion. to put that in perspective, that's $1 billion times three. [laughter] thank you. >> you need a calculator. >> greg: kat, do you understand what dorsey is talking about? >> of course not. >> greg: i think that he's saying twitter has been worse for the world than better. >> he regrets it. if he did, he would give all of his money to someone. it's so easy to say you regret doing something after you've already gotten all the good out of it and left everybody else with the problems. so i don't think he actually really regrets it. i don't believe him. but the elon musk thing is kind of exciting, because he was very specific about our concerns about free speech and sew wants to take it over. it'll be fun to see what happens. >> greg: yeah -- >> the only reason i don't have more followers is because i'm shadow banned and it's all by -- >> greg: exactly. >> exactly. it's not because i'm not the
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best. >> greg: tammy, what do you think musk is going to do? >> already there's an impact. there's some whiner who quit twitter on twitter. yes, he was saying i'm not going to work for him because what we're doing is saving people from bigots and spam. i quit. i'm resigning. so it's already having a fabulous impact. the only thing you could say to someone like that is bye felicia and hopefully it'll resonate. i think musk is doing clearly the right thing, just his presence makes a difference. there's certain specific things he can do like bring back the babylon bee, bring back trump and end shadow banning. there's basic things you can do and still have a decent company, but yet it is easy as you were saying. you can tweet against something you did from your mansion, you know? it's a really nice thing to be able to do, but this is a very good start and this by the way i have to say is part of the
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reason why there's a war on billionaires because they don't want guys like eaton buy things. they want you to not be able to do stuff and this is the kind of thing that makes a difference. good luck tomy him. >> greg: joey, i think elon musk was activated by the fact that social media platforms could curate and kind of manufacture stories, like they could hide the hunter biden laptop story. i think what he's aiming for or what i've read is make it available for to you choose your own algorithm as opposed to being manipulated. does that make sense to you, joey? >> makes a lot of sense. choose your flavor. listen to the lies you want to hear. tune in and listen to me talk. come on. elon musk is an incredibly interesting figure in our society and in the world really, but what i love about him is more times than not, he follows up with what sounds like a crazy promise or a crazy kind of pontification. last week, he was like, oh, looks like twitter is off the rails.
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i may have to do something about that. >> greg: and he goes on twitter and brings it up. >> then he becomes the largest shareholder. i don't know what owning 90% of a company -- i've never owned any percentage of any company at all -- at all. at all, so i don't know what that means. i'm not invested. i'm not divested. you know, i'm a paycheck-to-paycheck kind of guy. i kind of like it, you know? on that topic on elon musk, i want to buy a sport utility vehicle and that like reimagined ford pinto they call at tesla is not happening. for that reason, i'm not a big elon musk fan right now. why don't they monetize tweets the way they do on youtube? i would have made no less than $10 for three bottles by now. >> greg: we're all working for twitter. that's why i only promote -- like people go, why don't you go twitter anymore? i go to locals! i get paid by locals!
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i get $3-$4 million a year easily off that. i'm joking, of course. what's your name again? you go on twitter. >> i do! >> you're not very good at it, but you're there. >> no. >> greg: what do you think -- >> it's a struggle. it's a struggle. most of my thoughts are 141 characters. damn it. so close. >> greg: what do you think about elon musk? >> i love it. i love the idea of him sitting around in his bruce wayne mansion sitting in thongs ripped saying, i think i'll buy it. it was the american dream. >> greg: i don't know if this is true but i'm going to pretend it's true that he asked someone how much it was going to cost to cure or solve world hunger and they said you need $6 billion, and so he did that -- he gave them $6 billion. >> he did. that kind of stuff is incredible. >> greg: yeah. >> someone theorized how many trees you would have to plant to offset global warming. someone is like you need
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$1 trillion. trump jumped right on it. he got no credit with that. they're doing that as we speak. with elon musk, i don't own a business either. can you run a board meeting if you only own 9%? >> greg: is anyone here in business? >> i'm in business. >> greg: you're a business woman. >> i'm in business. >> greg: you were the 50 under 50? >> yeah, because i'm 49. i get it. i get it. >> greg: you were named 50 under 50 by forbes minority women monthly. >> right before i turned 50. >> greg: you're 50 under 50 minority woman. >> no, i'm a white 50-year-old lady. >> greg: who identifies. any way. where am i going? >> with elon with twitter, it doesn't matter, nothing means anything if he can't get into that algorithm. he needs to walk in there with morgan freeman and do a total bruce wayne batman, my friend is going to look at the algorithm, and all of a sudden liz warren sucks and trends every day.
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>> like i'm -- here's the deal. facebook marketplace is a god-sent to me. i want to be in the flea market but i'm a little bit too well-known to go. if you develop an algorithm to where facebook marketplace puts a used version of what i said i wanted in life and puts 10 versions of it up there, you should be able to click on twitter what you would prefer to be engaged in. >> greg: on that note, let's move on. get him a belt sander. i don't know what that is. sounds kinky, though. start wearing belts. >> it'll be like $50. >> greg: oh shut up. he may have committed battery and now he's leaving the academy. unlimited cashback match... only from discover.
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council hours from now coming from the global outrage over the mass killings in buchya on the outskirts of the capitol kyiv. "we want to you shot world what happened here." in the meantime, satellite images collected over buchya contradict russia's claim the bodiesity streets after russian troops withdraw. bodies of 410 civilians have been retrieved from buchya and other areas around kyiv. red cross says a team helping
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made in consulting, there'll never be an end to bias racism. rub my feet, greg, it's the only thing that brings me joy in this world. what are you going say, johnnie? >> i'm not going to ask you to rub my feet. i mean, you can but -- i mean, i'll never know it. >> greg: neither of us will get anything out of it. >> you can give me a nub hug. if you want to know what that is, see me after the show. >> greg: you're terrible. hollywood's gone nuts but is this about money now? is it about like when consultants get inside a place, it's all about just getting paid. >> this is a lot about running from yourself right now. they are in a place where these are the people who told us that masculinity was toxic and violence is never the answer. sorry, but it's true. these are the people that have virtue signaled us out of our own culture acting like normal
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people for a minute and i don't mean that to excuse will smith or anything but this is what normal people do. you're sitting at the house or sitting on the front porch in the neighborhood and someone yells, you know, something bad about your girl, you punch him in the face it may not be right, but -- >> greg: you understand it. >> i can understand it. if i came full circumstance olthis and made it all the way around to the point that i'm mostly mad people care. >> greg: i quote white on this, it's better on the will smith fiasco to be ambivalent. do not take any sides. look at everybody's dirty, tammy. everybody has a dirty hand in the whole thing. the collision between a woke celebrity culture and hip-hop credibility just head first, you know? he had to, like, he had to say it. he had to slap him even though it was wrong. >> unlike jerry springer and geraldo. never know what will happen. >> greg: i know what will
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happen with geraldo. >> no one really knows how the academy started. the film industry here started pretty much with people from burlesque, from new york, and they thought they really needed to try to show the american people through the news reels that would happen that they're serious and could dress up and be trusted. and look, what is this? 100 years later and we're back to smacking each other on the face on the stage. for me was shocking was -- i agree with you that sometimes you go maybe you need to slap someone who offends your wife, if that's what you do. did he not remember he was at the academy awards? did he not -- but -- and he was laughing. she got upset apparently from the -- and she looked at him and was clearly upset about it. and that is when he then decided to go and do that extraordinary thing. but it seemed to be such a break from reality. that is why americans didn't get it, because you know, you grow up loving film and you want to have this be a break from
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reality and suddenly it's not. on top of that, nobody knows who won the oscars except him. there's no discussion about the movies or anything else and there might have been some good stuff! >> i wouldn't have known. >> i never do, yeah. >> and like even with that bump, it abysmal rating, so what -- >> greg: it wouldn't have been the worst if it wasn't for will. >> does he have to give his trophy back or is he inconsequential. >> he needs to go away for a year. >> they're still investigating him. >> it's also hilarious, he's such a control freak and he's so full of self importance that he quits the academy. he can't wait for their judgment. he's like, i don't care. i don't need you. and you're like, bitch, they just invited you to a party and you cry! >> it happens. >> it does happen. >> greg: usually you go to the broom closet. >> no one talked about the
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fantastic job chris rock did for taking that slap and moving on with the show because i'm telling you, i would still be on the ground. i'd still thereby. oh my gosh, i got whiplash. i'm going to sue. i'd be talking lawyers. >> greg: do you find it weird there were so many movies up for the oscars? it's almost like hollywood really didn't participate in the lockdown. did you notice that? what if we did an awards show -- >> they didn't participate in the lockdowns because they filmed their movies in georgia and our governor didn't have a lockdown. march 16, 2020, that went away for us. >> because the pandemic, they didn't have -- if you're a rich, famous celebrity, then it doesn't apply to you. >> greg: tell me about it. >> you get it. and that's also why will smith had the exact same apology as every other rich celebrity. it was exactly the same. it was as all of them. he said i'm so sorry. there's no excuse. i accept every consequence and i will do the work. it was so weird to see this
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apology over a physical assault almost like chris harrison's apology when he resigned from the bachelor over something he said. >> greg: right, so true. >> you should print those out. >> greg: coming up, he's glad to be rid of trump, no matter what you have to pay at the pump. i got covid in september of 2020, and a few weeks later, i started to have long-term problems. i used to run five to six miles a day. now, when i walk up a flight of stairs, i'm gasping for air. it feels like my brain is clouded and i can't think straight. it's surreal that i'm going through this. i'm telling my long covid story because i don't want it to ruin other people's lives like it did mine. getting vaccinated against covid-19 is the best way to prevent long covid.
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and don't take it if you are on dialysis. take aim at chronic kidney disease by talking to your doctor and asking about farxiga. if you can't afford your medication, astrazeneca may be able to help. ♪far-xi-ga♪ >> greg: hello. he's glad trump is out the door even if it makes you poor. it's a hall of fame tight end who loves to con descend. on sunday, day of the week, michael, fox sports analyst evil shannon sharpe replied to a tweet asking if he still hated trump and he said i'd rather play $20 a gallon than have trump in answer. hope that [bleep] answers your question. sure did. is shannon sharpe adamas? the tweet almost got twice as many replies as it did retweets, something the kids call getting ratiod, i know because that's what they told me when we were
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all hanging out at the park yesterday. it's ok as long as i stay 50 feet away. later sharp pushed back on the idea that i don't care about the poor. "what part about i'd did you not see in my statement?" "i'd pay a million for a car" shannon sharpe thinks you're dumb. good thing he's rich because i think he just dumped more gasoline on the fire. that was incredible production value. tammy, um -- >> i clapped all the way. >> greg: does that incapsulate everything about the elite? we can handle the suffering so we're happy to have a democrat? >> yeah, yeah, it matters, and this is why we're seeing so many awful things happen. well, we got rid of trump, we got rid of everybody else thinking they can have a hand in government and that the rubes
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matert and poors matter. -- matter and the poors matter. it's a reveal about the internal sensibility of who matters and if people really exist or if they don't or if it's just their little bubble. it's awful and i think this is where you -- it's like going into a room without knocking on the door. you find out who people are when they tweet before they think. but you gotta have people tweet before they think and then they think it's fine with their friends and so they find out later. >> greg: kat, would you like to hear a brilliant, brilliant irony or a thought of some kind that's brilliant? the only way to endure the consequences of democrat economic policies is to be rich which is what democrats condemn as greedy but republicans proclaim as everyone's right to pursuit. do you follow that? >> i do. >> greg: oh, thank you. >> because i'm brilliant as
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well. i thought it was interesting that he doesn't see that, though, because in his tweet when he was trying to defend himself, he actually just repeated the reason that other people were mad. because he was like, i still pay $20 for glass. he's like, no, you guys -- for gas. he's like, no, you guys, you don't understand. $20 is no big deal for me. i'm really rich and could spend $1 million on a car. that's why people think you're a [bleep] because you're saying it's no big deal to you but obviously other people will have to do that, too. you don't get individual gas prices. >> greg: exactly, i pay $20. you guys pay nothing. >> that's hilarious. >> greg: the people who caused inflation are the people who could endure inflation. yes. >> then they rub it in your face. you don't get it. i'm rich. it is completely ironic because that's how rich i want to be. i want to be so rich i could be a democrat and not care, right? >> greg: exactly. exactly, exactly. >> and then make horrible decisions that make everybody
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poor and then i could be like, oh, i should have made better decisions. it's like a snake eating its own tail. >> greg: very erotic. >> he's shining a lot on this whole, like, um, the elite ruling class. we keep seeing it more and more. like nanci pelosi eating her million dollar chocolate ice cream and she goes -- >> greg: i don't think it was a million dollars. i think you're exaggerating. i think the refrigerator was very expensive. >> how much is $3 billion again. >> greg: it's $1 billion times three. >> ok, i had to do that math again. it's like they make the rules and they don't want to live by them. it won't last with america. they won't dig it we're the anti-feudism country. >> greg: he's right there, joey. >> this guy is so stupid to understand this. i would rather pay $20. ok, fair enough, but the point of your tweet was you'd rather have a president that makes gas $20 a gallon than one who ironically tweets things you
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don't like and keeps gas below $3 a gallon. listen, i get it. these are dumb things people tweet because they get bored and don't know what to do. this guy likes attention. there's two people that like democrat policies, people too poor or not willing to change their circumstances enough it doesn't affect you. inflation doesn't affect you if you're all the way at the bottom any way. i know that, because i've been there. inflation doesn't affect you if you're insulated from it. it's all the people in the middle that are trying to start a business or trying to keep a job or working two jobs to get the benefits that one job would afford us, it's the people that are really working every day and trying to build something with themselves that inflation is going to hurt the worse. they're the ones that buy the gross product or have to make something for someone to do it shannon sharpe never made anything except for a paycheck for catching and throwing balls. >> the people in the middle are the closest to making the difference to the people at the top. that's who it affects. >> greg: i have to move on,
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>> greg: we're short on time. here is the story in five words. jean jacket not for adults. kat? >> um, i mean this is a whole story? i think i put a lot less thought into what i wear than most people do. you can be too old for things. i've been the same size since i was 14. i started throwing away everything i got at limited, too. >> greg: oh, that's good. the story, i believe, was this the "new york times" piece? sarah palin wore a jean jacket. they thought, oh, time to screw over the jean jacket. >> sarah palin is in the news because she's running for the one house seat in alaska that's not been up for grabs in 50 years? that's an interesting thing to know. >> greg: that's an interesting thing to know including the jean jacket. >> i can't make fun of jean jackets. i'm wearing shorts. i don't know what i can do. >> greg: i don't know what you can do.
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are you yawning? >> no. it was a blank between the middle of this conversation. i'd leave it there. i will leave it there. >> greg: is there an age where it's no longer appropriate? >> every lady, though n the audience is thinking lovingly about it. >> these are jeans greg gave me i just rolled the cuff on them. >> i know what they are. yes, what? >> greg: i don't know. you weren't listening. >> i have a jean jacket, but as one might mention about aleve, i've got a torn rotator cuff, and they are particularly difficult to get on if you can't move your arm back. and so, yes, depending, i suppose on age f you can't move your arms in a certain way, you literally can't get them on. i nocera palin is ready for anything because she's got her jean jacket on. go palin! >> greg: i saved you for last. i'm going to let the camera go
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over your repulsive apparel. it's not like you're on brokeback mountain, dude. >> not anymore. >> greg: how old are you? 70? >> i'm 74. >> greg: you still wear that old jacket. >> i do! i love it. >> greg: why? >> why not wear something you like and that you're comfortable with? there's no rule! >> greg: i'm being facetious. we have jeans privilege. it's ok to wear jeans on your lower body for weeks on end but wear the jean jacket, oh now you're in trouble with the "new york times." >> they're so good at predicting the future. oh, the internet, that's just a fad. that'll go away. russia collusion. they're in the newspaper business. they can't see their own demise. it's like asking a dinosaur who do you think will win the final four! >> greg: dude, we were just talking about the jean jacket. you don't have to get upset about it, ok? >> i felt attacked. i lashed out. i was will smith in this
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scenario. >> greg: there you were. all right. let's go to the break. we'll be right back. ♪simply irresistible♪ applebee's irresist-a-bowls are back. now starting at $8.99. now that's eatin' good in the neighborhood. allergies don't have to be scary. spraying flonase daily stops your body from overreacting to allergens all season long. psst! psst! flonase all good. >> tech: does your windshield have a crack? trust safelite. >> tech vo: this customer had auto glass damage, but he was busy working from home... ...so he scheduled with safelite in just a few clicks. we came to his house... ...then we got to work. we replaced his windshield and installed new wipers to protect his new glass, while he finished his meeting. let safelite come to you. >> man: looks great. thank you. >> tech: my pleasure.
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we are out of time. thank you. shannon bream is next. i'm greg gutfeld. and i love you, america. >> welcome to "fox news at night". i'm shannon bream in washington. breaking tonight, set to addres the united nations security council and tuesday after evidence of atrocities surface. ukrainian officials think more than 400 bodies have been found. they were subject to tortur
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