>> laura: joe biden thinks the saudi crown prince should be considered a pariah? >> you heard from the president on friday he made very clear that he made his views very clear the crown prince. "gutfeld!"'s next! why is kgb still going on? ♪ ♪ [cheers and applause] >> greg: oh, excuse me! happy monday, my monday friends! i hope you had a good weekend! i did! big news over at national public radio. maybe the first time anyone has ever said that.

they announced they are launching a disinformation reporting team featuring journalists whose expertise apparently is fake news. that must've been been hard to find. every journalist these days as an expert on fake news. like seeing a french bulldog is a expert on farting. that's all they do. something about their flat faces. good to see mpr realizing the necessity of policing fake news like a drug addict checking himself into rehab admitting you have a problem. npr is the first step, so good for you. the first investigation via themselves this tweet from npr it's self right before the 2020 election. here, mpr asks why you haven't seen stories from them about "the new york post" story on hunter biden which the paper broke a month or so before the 2020 election. as you know, the story was flushed on a toilet like an

ounce of crack when cops kick in hunter's front door. [laughter] debating whether to reread that. >> they got it. >> greg: it's monday. i have a lot on my mind. yeah, they buried the story only to resurface it later when hunter's dad was safely transported to the oval office like a mannequin to his door front window. like job trying to complete a handshake. the whole thing worked perfectly. this is npr's explanation for not covering the story. we don't want to waste our time on stories that are not really stories. we don't want to waste leaders s and readers time. a segment on the challenges of

the himalayas? just more evidence of the white patriarchy at work. an urgent moment when news is vital, no one ever yelled quick, put on npr! unless it's to put a patient to sleep for emergency surgery. how thoughtful of them? apparently mpr was doing people a favor by filtering out stories that might disturb them. but they were not filtering at all. they were blocking, cherry picking, censoring, then acting like it's a federated view. if it's for your own good, sister! here you've got the biggest most consequential stories in the election season as they buried it like a mouthy hitchhiker in the desert. [laughter] wouldn't shut up. they called something fake news when it's real, and they assumed no one would call them on it which, for the most part, they were right. but they knew they had to do their part to protect old show

as his campaign wobbled into the white house like a rascal scooter with two bad wheels. that's not a mistake or disinformation or joe reading the brand name off of his teleprompter. it's called lying, and npr did it to influence an election. i wonder what happened behind closed doors. >> okay, boss, i've got some story pages for you. hunter biden weighing crack with a hooker. what about hunter biden with two hooker's and a dog? what about hunter biden smoking crack while touching himself? >> let's just pick stories with stomach like we always do, with the cheese singles. [laughter] >> nondiary indigenous patio furniture? >> there's the story. >> all go read it out.

[applause] >> greg: so they started disinformation but the only disinfo they will focus on is stuff that flows in one direction and that's from right to left. if they didn't, when they first address the hidden hunter story out of the gate? unless you enjoy turning blue and rendering yourself on don mcgahn cautious, don't hold your breath. we counted npr to find out if they wed and we got nothing but an automated email and response. i guess npr stands for no professional response. [laughter] >> clever audience tonight. >> greg: yeah. i get why. npr's attempt at fact-checking

is no different as they let more whoppers live through bryce elders digestive tract. meanwhile, they will chase down memes by private citizens or docs them for making jokes, or worse, telling the truth. if after an exhaustive investigation, we found out there was no cat holding on to a tree branch saying hang in there! we also found no evidence that there is a frog named pepe. meanwhile, i've been doing my own investigation with fact-checkers and i mentioned that dr. jill is a medical doctor and not a single correction from the fact-checkers. i'm serious. it means i'm going to go ahead with having her remove my gallbladder. it was nice knowing you folks. but i keep waiting for "the washington post" or anybody to call me on an end even though i made it up, it's a lie that fits their narrative. who cares? maybe it's not their fault,

maybe they're confused because dr. jill is always seen with the shoveling elderly man, a month away from going to joe's press events wearing scrubs and covering the market carrying a bedpan thank you. but that's the way it goes. the real fake news is actually npr's approach to fake news. the false front to appear like they're tackling something when in fact they are creating another wall of interference against real news hitting their viewers. it's another user interface to protect their listeners from the truth. much of the way flexicurity protects me from overzealous but i keep it classy. just like the flimsy top bag that mpr gives away, nobody is buying it. no matter how honest and gentle your voice as are not reporting

it, we hear the be as loud and clear. your response to fake news is just more fake news. fact-check that. yes, every time he speaks, i feel like i'm about to get grounded. the host of "the five," jeanine pirro. and when he performs on cruise ships, they aim for iceberg. actor, writer, comedian. speak of the devil, and she'll appear. fox news contributor. and when he's under the weather, he just stands up. judge, are you doing?

happy monday. treating you? everything good? >> i don't like mondays. you know what i was thinking when you are going to that, as there always been fake news or hasn't just been worse? speak one that was my question. that was my question. >> it was not. >> greg: do you think they can use as a new phenomenon on with social media or hasn't always been around but we've never really noticed. i think that walter cronkite and harry reasoner and all those folks probably practicing their own media assumptions too. we were taught to believe that they were truly objective, but we didn't know until fox came in and showed us how left-wing everybody is. >> went down the curtain. >> greg: i hate when people do that to me. you know what i mean. especially the shower curtain,

am i right? can control yourself. i don't know. they don't even try to follow my train of thought today. >> that info just freak me out what you said they would aim for iceberg. because i used to really do, comedy on alaskan cruise ship sometimes am the best part of those is the people are so old, like there are so old that you can be as offensive as you want as a comedian and they can walk out even if they want to. >> greg: can hear you? >> yeah. >> greg: that have the battle of the camp. what you make of all this fake news, this disinformation? you get the feeling they're only going to look at one side of the coin. >> i do get that feeling and i also thought it was great that they were like we are going to form the committee that is going to figure out which new stories are real and which one aunt, and i will like you guys should have

been doing that. >> greg: exactly. >> is a news program, you should have been doing about time. remember when the covid and in certain businesses were doing because of covid -- because of covid, we are going to wash the sheets. you will like what, you guys want watching the sheets? >> greg: start wiping down the things we should have been wiping down. >> i'm at the terrible article it said the dirtiest part of a hotel, it says the doorknob actually -- did you know that? it's at the door knob has fecal matter on it. >> that don't. because the handle of the door and i was thinking fecal matter? are many things you have to be carrying in order to open the door you use your. see one good question. he raises a very important --

core that was correct. that was correct. >> 47 grocery bags in one hand. >> greg: i would love to go shopping, i'd take to go to costco. that would be so much fun. >> the question you didn't ask judge, but judge brought up, it didn't used to be there because news wasn't about ratings. it was the bad news. we had the crazy stuff when you were in line. it was like why rains is elephant and a guy marries an alien. we had the crazy stories and those papers. no one ever talks about how they were run out of business by cnn for stuff because they stole all the fun stories and the fake stories to get ratings and make

money and have careers and journalist were pushed out, or people identifying a journalist but really were just opinionated and one-sided, that is i think when water was in, water wasn't getting sponsors and water wasn't getting paid to tell one side of the other, i wasn't pushing an election and stuff, so did change. once it went to ratings, the game was over. >> greg: i was the original source code for bat boy. >> yes, actually, i did. have a tattoo of it on the top of your head. even that is true. only you can see it. >> there you go. >> greg: that was unnecessary. >> so hard, people are so mean to you. >> greg: it's true. i believe that we have to have some responsibility on the fact that we have the new 24/7, we have to fill all these buckets. a lot of buckets are going to be filled with rule. >> yeah. >> greg: yeah. that is my comment. >> except they weren't fill in with rule, there are filling

with stuff that has been some regional eyes but realism and boring or not that big of a deal. i think that the most important thing to consider is probably just the motive in terms of when someone is selling you something. do they have a motive to tell me this, what is it, why? in your own motive, because a lot of time, when you want to believe something. given that are very good point, you're talking about confirmation bias. >> i sure am. >> bucket of growth? normally, it would be a different bucket. they were and what that mean? oh, i get it. yes, i shifted away from certain topics to other topics. >> bucket of regular gruel. >> greg: everybody is mean to me. what did i do? >> just a bucket of gruel. >> greg: up next is dr. gill, job's newest

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one dr. jill drones on about how the thrill is gone. president's agenda opposed by all the problems his policies because the analyst of what they didn't see coming is longer than one of foods joe enjoys coming. screw you, dr. seuss. new sheriff in town. this week, first lady, professor and pediatric neurosurgeon, dr. jill biden. i'm trying. she whined that the slow

progress of a husband political agenda is due to unexpected problems at home and overseas. during a private fund-raiser, my invite must have got lost in the mail, dr. jill lamented the president has so many hopes and plans for things they wanted to do, but every time i turned around, he had to assess the problems of the moment. the what i did there? i sure didn't have said that. he just has so many things thrown his way. 79 year old not having his plans come true. especially when those plans include don't go in the bathtub. but we get it. not like presidents are supposed to anticipate things or rise to the challenges that every leader faces when they run the free world. instead, normal president should never expect a crisis. he should just cruise along on a bomber jacket and aviator sunglasses. knowing his vp has got

everything covered. right, kam? if only we had some new, lock linguine complete with bongos. >> vice president harris: i do believe that we -- we certainly believe that -- we should just settle. >> clearly were not. >> vice president harris: and that's why i do believe that we are living in an unsettled times. >> greg: perfect. meanwhile -- only here, saturday during a trip to the middle east, joe was stumbling to it as usual. >> president biden: you've heard me say before in the western mountains, and global initiatives, global infrastructure -- is this consistent with with who we are?

the questions sometimes say what i mean. i just answer the question. i don't forget anything i said. stephen biegun thing he remembers that it made sense to me. what say you, joe? >> she's a doctor. she is right. how am i supposed to get anything done with all the things happening? make prices go down, but they are going up. it's the opposite, man. get the global warming thing happening, but it's too hot. you ought. jail or just married and affleck? who saw that coming? i thought he was gay married to matt damon? >> greg: he would be a great president if nothing was

happening. >> they keep saying this. remember, biden observed at the 23rd i was getting stuff done by people capturing stuff on my desk. you're the president. if there was nothing, we wouldn't need one. that was crazy, i hadn't seen that before, the speech where he was just like you've heard me say before that he has made a point of noises. i thought he was going to -- for a minute there, that was crazy. when i heard he was on a four-day trip, i was like how long was that? >> greg: that was good. that was good. i love how these all these people are going on. crime and war. speak of the few times he came out of the cellar, he told us

that he had years and years of experience. that he has seen everything you could possibly think of except -- >> greg: everything. >> everything you could possibly think of. somebody said the bill failed in its just a big old bucket of gruel. >> greg: not going to say it. not going to say. kat, i think the problem with biden is that he wasn't supposed to work. everything was supposed to go back to normal. once complete, everything is going to smooth out. now, the world doesn't cater to people who -- i don't know the end of that sentence. >> well, you got the first part out okay. >> greg: thank you. >> that was great.

i actually don't think that they should have been surprised. what she is saying is they did all the stuff that he wanted to do, but it's the other stuff keeps happening. think pretty well established that the presidency is a fast-paced work environment. that's what it's about. you have to deal with things as they come up. you're the president. >> greg: i hear what you're saying, judge, what they're saying is they which there were two president. the one that walked around, shaking hands. job just want to be the vice president and on any devicl president who should be republican. done. i know! judge, i swear i get more applause. try that on "the five."

>> yeah, i will try that. here's the thing with her. she is as dumb as he is. she because we never expected roe vs. wade and 90 think about it and she is like no, wait, we didn't believe it. and then she says whether we know about your parade, we never expected it. all these things happen. they were building up for months and months, and the rest joe for weapons. they did not was coming. we have 13 -- we don't know about it. the day you walked in, you knew about it. what are talking about? you're lying, that's all. >> greg: he's never been right on anything. >> he's never been right on any core policy issue ever. >> greg: but you know eye is always happy? because he's eternally surprised by the next moment in time. >> i think it would have been better served if we would have

ran for walmart greeter. there's always something new coming in. eventually, someone is going to find the handshake, stand in front of the door. >> greg: down the corn pop story. they don't have a choice when they are in line trying to buy the -- >> he would stand right in front of the cards, you would have to go through him, and then have to move back. >> and then you would ask a question what i'll is so-and-so. what are you asking me for? is this my job? >> greg: not my job. two president. we should get a real president that is republican and then the guy that is good at playing a president, the democrat. the democrat is charismatic. the bill clinton, the barack obama in the behind-the-scenes, you got the mechanic i got donald trump doing all the weird stuff. i like how they went to jamie

nodding. as if that would help my nonsense. >> i saw it coming and really sold it. >> greg: up next is racism on display at the fancy ballet? ion. botox® prevents headaches in adults with chronic migraine before they even start—with about 10 minutes of treatment once every 3 months. so, ask your doctor if botox® is right for you, and if a sample is available. effects of botox® may spread hours to weeks after injection causing serious symptoms. alert your doctor right away, as difficulty swallowing, speaking, breathing, eye problems, or muscle weakness can be signs of a life-threatening condition. side effects may include allergic reactions, neck and injection site pain, fatigue, and headache. don't receive botox® if there's a skin infection. tell your doctor your medical history, muscle or nerve conditions, and medications, including botulinum toxins, as these may increase the risk of serious side effects. in a survey, 92% of current users said they wish

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and keeps you full? let's get those buns toastin' bread. cheese. 10 more. go! ♪ i'm getting shredded! ♪ make the smart choice. land o'frost premium meat. >> greg: so you want to be a dancer? the nerve to get comment the other. england is school of contemporary dance, which is wired my nickname leo toured. tard. has apparently dropped ballet from additions because it white and elitist. undergrad studies francisco mccarty said it is essentially an elitist form that is built around particular white european ideas and body shapes that are often alienating to young people who do not fit the esthetic ideal. god forbid they look fat nose

types. instead of cutting out the fish and chips, not just kill the entire performing part. but maybe the right. when you think about it, what is more racist than swansea? those swans are almost always white. plus, they are good at swimming. see what i mean? terrible, terrible. not only is ballet racist, its transfer because also. just look at the title, the nutcracker. there was a ship to ladies and gentlemen over time, but it is still problematic with the inclusion of nonbinary and trans-dancers. they used terms like people and folk do not make the assumptions of identities. don't identify as an offshore oil worker. unless you're cruised in a t for a long time. i know what it's like.

kat, you could have been a ballet dancer, but you chose not to. was it because it was racist? >> yes. >> greg: will be right back. cnn interview right there. how did you first know it was racist, kat? >> it's just a feeling that i had and i was disgusted by it. so i decided to make my entire life against it. ballet is an elitist. bali is an elitist, but you're not else's is a late test? tens of thousands of dollars for a few years of dancing school. that is what anybody who goes there would be doing. i feel like if they can afford dancing school and advanced dancing school, i you probably could afford ballet lessons all sorts of. >> greg: there something else

going on here, judge. it's like, what's more elitist -- being an undergraduate studies at the performing arts that's elitist. how do they start on ballet, which as you know, is very dear to my heart. >> clearly, i've seen you in tights. even the thing is, ireland, you have to put them to do over the tights. that was a mistake. >> some problem for me. when i was done thing, when they decided they wanted everything to be gender neutral and i had to carry the guy instead of him carrying me, that's when i knew it wasn't for me anymore. the guy carries the goal. dances around with us. carrying them or caring for them. >> greg: carrying men. >> only in my dorm. four-legged dogs.

>> greg: you got something against three legged dogs? >> no. i like french dogs. not bulldogs. enough of that. >> greg: you know, what you think, tyrus, tyrus? >> i don't know what you think right now. save a you said this before, that the idea that something that requires discipline or esthetic is seen as racist, it's more insulting to people that are like you're not eligible to take part in something so deeply disciplined or, i don't know. >> the answer needs to be its elitist, no, you can do it, so you want to change the game, you want to make it easier. we live in that i can't compete at a high level, so we'll just lower the bar, and you can be out of shape because ballet is one of the toughest artforms

there is. only a chosen few who work hard and literally dedicate their life to it can do it, and if you can't, and you said i want to be a ballet dancer, and you weigh 400 pounds, you're going to have a hard time. your ankles alone. the point is, it's just like someone thing i didn't make it in the nfl. your 5'4", you have never been in a gym. you're not going to make it and you're not good enough. there's other things you can do, but if you just can't always be the top-of-the-line. this is just trying to make more people out of shape. >> greg: you know what? you're sending a different message when we say hey, plus side model, go on "sports illustrated," you're not fit if you are obese. jamie, that is not directed at you. i can tell you of losing some

weight. >> whenever people say that, i feel like it is. ever notice that? >> greg: you have joked about ballet? >> you're not really got me thinking, you guys are talking about four-legged dogs and three legged dog. whenever i meet three legged dogs, they always like this is lucky. and i'm like, is he? is he? >> greg: what a great point, for certain things, you're to be smaller, but you wouldn't go to a powerlifting competition and say this isn't fair. those people are too big. small people should be able to -- it doesn't make any sense. maybe we can start a new thing where it can be like bigger a plus-sized musicals or something, then they could include, fiddler on the reinforced roof. we could have -- oreos and juliet.

>> greg: was funny. i didn't see where you're going with this. i liked it. i like you. do you see the other part of the article saying that you shouldn't save manpower anymore or you shouldn't say baby boomer. i was like i don't see that stuff. it's one of the things were if they haven't brought that up, i never would have occurred to me. it's like if somebody says don't think of a pink elephant. i'm literally thinking about brian stelter right now. laughter is the best medicine. coming up, or expiration dates based on race? causing too much weight moderate-to-severe eczemadur or atopic dermatitis under control? hide my skin? not me. by hitting eczema where it counts, dupixent helps heal your skin from within, keeping you one step ahead of eczema.

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>> greg: hello. as the food industry a big fat liar for saying when the sloppy joe expires? yes, the jar of pickles that was forgotten.

isn't necessarily always wanted. good news for dumpster divers. food industry experts, call cnn, most companies pick expiration dates based on when they think the food will stop wasting the best, not when it actually goes bad. if that's true, then kidney beans expire before they are even canned. why do they can't them? in other words, those expiration dates are often more about protecting the brand than food safety. by expiration date, i don't mean -- met on tinder. it's been a while. not even a national standard. there's not even a national standard for how expiration dates are determined. i feel like a local consumer news reporter. coming up, research says that throwing out food too soon is responsible for 20% of food waste and 8% of global greenhouse gas emissions. of course, some expired food can really make you sick.

like the time i didn't read that ham. don't ignore that expiration date like jamie sitting alone at a bar. when in doubt, just what i do. try these out. not again. tyrus, you've never made me dinner. i don't take that personally, but if you were to make me -- >> i have made you a lot of things. >> greg: do you pay attention to this stuff? >> i do pay attention as we are hearing rumblings of food shortages and all of a sudden, lo and behold, this little article comes out, and were like expiration dates, what does it really mean? it's a suggestion so they can keep bad food on the shelves longer so people will buy more. that's what it looks like to me,

one of those walk things instead of actually fix the problem, they just lower the bar. the problem is when you lower the bar with things like dairy and stuff like that, you can have a lot of sick people are canned foods and staff that expired, fruit and vegetables. there should be a message that we need to start kidding about the way we eat in terms of stay away from things like black toast and dairy because there is a good chance that you could might be a cure for cancer, as opposed to a good snack. >> greg: whenever the lower the bar, i'm always on the floor looking for it. >> i'll cook a meal for you. >> greg: you did, it was delicious. you did, i had some food operator of the other day. i don't remember anything after that. >> here is one thing i want to say. >> greg: go for it. >> you're not make the crazy? you have a cleaning lady, she comes in and she goes to all

your space and she decides to throw them out. when i want to go, i have no spices. >> greg: did you have her deported? >> first world problems! >> i think most food, i agree with tyrus. the expiration date, it is going. >> greg: that's all you got to say. >> in all seriousness, when i was like a poor, poor college kid, that when you don't pay that much attention, because it would save best buy december, and i'm like what is the deadly by date. i don't have any money. in general, i do not trust expiration dates at all. i used to drink a lot, i've written quite a bit. i don't anymore, but i remember wine month and i bought some good work boxed wine, i bought a box of wine and the guy was like this is going to last 14 days.

it only lasted me 48 hours. >> greg: a flashback of buying dented cans. >> i would never do that, i am too scared of botulism. i don't even know how i heard about it. >> wow, that's crazy, man. >> greg: worried about kidnapping. >> i don't know, i was like if i get botulism, it will be bad. but i didn't get it, so. other people did. i feel like this is not that good of a cell. that data is just when it starts to taste bad, like i don't want to be an elitist, but i'm looking for more from the food i

select than just want to make you die. >> greg: it sucks, with some of these super delicious things will make you sick. ice cream is amazing, and sometimes, when i'm desperate, just decide i'll be sick all day tomorrow and then a later point of ice cream. because i hope you are doing okay. >> first world problems! >> greg: all right up next, is our health to low if we can't touch autos? other allergy sprays take hours astepro starts working in 30 minutes. so you can... astepro and go. ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ "shake your thang" by salt n pepa ♪♪ before discovering nexium 24hr

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♪ the barnes firm injury attorneys ♪ ♪ call one eight hundred, eight million ♪ ipods. people can touch their toes. judge, new survey finds that he only 51% of people can touch that was without straining. what you think about that? >> i think it's too high. >> greg: aren't you supposed to strain when you touch your toes? doesn't that make sense? >> i don't want to fetch him. maybe they are pregnant. >> greg: do you go. the problem with being pregnant is you are fat. when i get pregnant, and i can't because i'm so fit. >> it's probably even higher number than reported for people who couldn't finish the survey because they dropped their pen.

>> greg: it's all about stretching, kat. it's all about stretching. >> what is all about stretching, because i can touch my toes but i've never been a situation where i'm like i have a problem, but good thing i can touch my toes. even it seems like a good idea. i haven't touched my toes in 40 years. >> that's not what the guys at the gym site. >> greg: you never go to the gym i go to. >> no, i do not. >> greg: you don't even know the secret knock. >> no i don't, no i don't. or the tap. >> greg: yeah, that was a trick. >> technology, man. why work out, why it in public, why go to the store when you have a tour brought to you?

what do you think is going to happen? >> greg: isn't just about -- >> flexibility, and people get flexible. there is a thing, if you are like a bag of oatmeal and you have no muscles, you can wrap your toes too, it doesn't really matter. it just depends on what you're doing, movementwise. you know who i'm talking about. you can spot them by the chemicals and then they are just kind of like flexible. they can fit in things like an octopus. >> greg: i have shot up, but i'm in great shape. jamie has super long arms and doesn't do anything. it's freakishly gross. i don't like that at all. >> i love it. >> have you get things of the top shelf for him. you would be great.

>> greg: this is a hateful little show. big bucket of cruel. mean-spirited people here today. don't go away, we'll be right erback. it's every-other-month, injectable cabenuva. for adults who are undetectable, cabenuva is the only complete hiv treatment you can get every other month. cabenuva helps keep me undetectable. it's two injections, given by a healthcare provider every other month. it's one less thing to think about while traveling. hiv pills aren't on my mind. a quick change in my plans is no big deal. don't receive cabenuva if you're allergic to its ingredients or taking certain medicines, which may interact with cabenuva. serious side effects include allergic reactions, post-injection reactions, liver problems, and depression. if you have a rash and other allergic reaction symptoms, stop cabenuva and get medical help right away. tell your doctor if you have liver problems or mental health concerns, and if you are pregnant, breastfeeding, or considering pregnancy. some of the most common side effects include injection-site reactions, fever, and tiredness.

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>> greg: thanks to judge jeanine pirro, jamie, our studio audience. i love you, america. ♪ ♪ >> shannon: hello, and welcome to "fox news @ night," i'm shannon bream and washington. ♪ ♪ the president and the middle east met by yet another round of plummeting poll numbers, according to the latest fox news poll, more than nine in ten americans are very concerned about inflation and a majority of you expecting it would be even worse next year. our panel is standing