undeterred. >> had we known that then, the insidious nature of spread in the community would've been much, much more of an alarm and they would have been much, much more stringent restrictions in the sense of very, very heavy encouraging people to wear masks, physical distancing, or what have you. >> laura: he has immunity from learning. "gutfeld!." ♪ ♪ [scattered applause] >> greg: yeah! all right! happy monday, everyone, i love mondays, and what a great show tonight. john rich is here. yeah! he is a famous country singer, and i know this because under his cowboy hat is another smaller cowboy hat.

charlie kirk, the founder of tp usa is here. he has no idea where he is because he's hammered on relief factor. sebastian gorka is the dealer. tom -- [scattered applause] i guess someone got sick and we needed a filling. what a coup to land him as a guest. i kid, he works next door as a greeter at applebee's. and of course kat. you know kat. currently she's living on a steady diet of bait smoke and/or olives. so about my weekend, it was great. i watched a movie called "ambulance." no? that's a huge change from my usual weekend when i watch a movie while in in an ambulance. it's nonstop a generalized

action, and no surprise, it's directed by michael bay, who has all the subtlety of nancy pelosi's plastic surgeon. but the movie is also a finger in the eye of modern cinema in that unlike the others it aims to please the audience. it hits you in the face like it made a joke about will smith's wife. so i thought why not pirate bay to create our new ad for "gutfeld!"? why not, indeed? >> i play by my own rules. i'm america's bad boy. now where the most successful late-night show in the history of all television. i'll crush you. i'll crush you like a bug. >> are we going to do? >> what's going on! >> do you have any bruises? >> it was so pathological. >> you're wasting my time. >> they create phony resistance. what is wrong? >> they gave us $4 million.

blood money! >> i am so blind with rage! ♪ ♪ >> i don't need to hear about your body fluids. >> greg: it wasn't really michael bay. just an idea. so on sunday i was a speaker at turning point in tampa. i made an understated entrance. ♪ ♪ i love all that steam. so dramatic. plus, they moisturize. my favorite days working at chippendale's. i call it work, but i was really just volunteering. they asked me to leave. i also had a pretty good opening act. ♪ ♪

there she is. i mean, talk about an ugly baby. who brings their kids out there? after two years with kat though, that dog needs his own emotional support dog. i would've walked out with my pet, but i keep him locked in a closet so his parents keep thinking he's really backpacking in europe. [scattered laughter] but earlier, something weird happens that tells you all you need to know about the media and their politics. some creep showed up outside with flags, are brilliantly original idea. i guess it was meant to be a stunt to smear the thousands of students by thinking they are like minded souls. much like when lincoln project try to smear republican governor glenn youngkin at a rally, i don't know if your member that when they dressed up like some idiots in cheap khakis and polo shirts, just like they marched over from a sale at target.

if the losers stunt but it reveals some key facts. one, some people want to call you a racist so badly that they will become a racist to do it. it also, we have no idea who they are. that's odd. they could be real nazis, and i say the quacks like hitler -- where they nazis for a day sent from a counter protest temp agency? i think so. my guess is it's a sleazy trick by the left to make lazy journalists think nazis and young conservatives overlap. they display deeply offensive bigotry by emulating the bigotry themselves, which really isn't a stretch for them anymore. if you don't believe me, ask uncle clarence thomas, the face of white supremacy himself, larry elder. fortunately for the left, since there were actual racists that they had to play dress-up because when there's a shortage of hate, sometimes you've got to make up some of your own. and it got picked up by the media faster than parmesan crumbs on hunter's rug.

who reported it without really doing any reporting at all. you would think you would want to know who these people are, track them down, get their names, you know, try to out them and ruin their lives like they do to parents who dare to speak up at a board of education meeting, but it's almost like the media knew who they were already, so why bother? and here i thought the real domestic threat was white supremacy, and get the media can't be expected to follow up. but in all fairness, they still were reporting on january 6th. did i say reporting? i mean being court stenographer for adam schiff. if this nazi slime were actual republicans you can bet they would already have their names, addresses, favorite vegetable, and blood type. and if they are real nazis, those people aren't known for keeping a low profile. meanwhile, inside the hall there were thousands of kids coming to listen to me, kat, and others like judge jeanine.

judge put on a hell of a speech, you could hear her voice from the space station. >> we can't give money for americans in american stores who are working to defend themselves? of course not. >> greg: i hope she's not watching. and the reaction when pete hegseth spoke, oh, my. ♪ ♪ >> greg: he really is our generation's david cassidy. he even uses the partridge family school bus to drive around all his children. but who was the most beloved speaker? i think you know the answer. ♪ ♪ [scattered applause] so basically this is woodstock for fox fans except acid has been replaced with my pillow. but it's a good thing because

today there are more ways than ever to combat the groupthink of the campus left. it's organizations like this. i didn't have it when i was a kid, you know, other people around shared my views. if you don't count "dungeons & dragons" on friday nights. but usually i had to find my own fun. thank god for my farrah fawcett poster. what do you mean? i don't understand. the event shows you the difference between tactics. inside the building its action and practical advice. outside it is stunts designed to destroy, catering to a pliable media. they are so addicted to their own [bleep], they have to get with them. it's much like a january 6 show trial. everyone knows its political theater, spoon-fed like joe biden's gerber strained peas. but they gush over it anyway. >> the sheer amount of new information they have uncovered is genuinely remarkable. >> and how they've given it to us. >> that was exactly what i was just going to same.

>> that was what i was going to say. it has been a tour de force of production. >> i think it's going to change how any congressional hearing is held to a standard. because the dash you know, the circus that usually happens is no longer going to be seen as entertainment. >> greg: they are not even hiding the fact that it's propaganda. that it's indeed a production, and they embraced it because being entirely one-sided, there's no unknowing counterpoint that might turn it into a circus. if like a puppet show where they have their hands off their own buy asses to. don't try that. it's harder than it looks. it's also a stunt to placate lazy journalists who think summarizing stuff from a televised hearing his work. it isn't. you know what's work? go outside and talk to americans, how they feel about their money being spent on

trials that will now extend into september. my choice is they will bite your head off. let me rephrase that, my prayer is they will bite your head off. they're worried about gas prices, food shortages, rising crime, and their 401(k) turning into 101k. they don't care about a bunch of idiots playing dress-up and i'm not even talking about the nazis. ♪ ♪ let's welcome tonight's guests! he's spent more time and number one been a man who needs flomax, john rich! [scattered applause] this former eagle scout knows how to tie liberals in knots, founder of turning point usa and author of the new book, charlie kirk! [scattered applause] and believe it or not, this is him after a tanning session. fox news contributor tom saloom!

and finally, when she needs a good left, she will watch "marley and me." fox news contributor kat timpf. [scattered applause] so, john, congratulations, you have a number one song now? >> i do. it's number one in the usa. [applause] >> greg: and it's called "progress" >> ironically called progress. it only came out last friday, went straight to the top on itunes, knocked out liz oh and billy eilers, which is incredible, and basically just talks about all the bad stuff going on in the country under the banner progress, which i find to be really ironic. >> greg: so you knocked them out, so basically you like knocking women around. >> only on the charts. >> greg: says democrats. >> it's a fun to see it going like that. >> greg: why do you think that's successful now? maybe if you try that into the fact that nobody really cares about the january 6th files

because they got so much going on. >> the chorus says stick your progress where the sun don't shine, leave your big mess away from your mind, leave us alone we would all be is fine, so stick progress with the sun don't shine. [scattered applause] >> greg: charlie, new book, congratulations, and a big event this weekend, care to share your thoughts on my marvelous monologue? >> first, what is a television practitioner? i'm a tv practitioner. what is that all about? by the way, the generous six committee, they could learn something from turning point usa events as far as the entrance, okay? no smoke, there's no flames going up. >> greg: when you saw that effect, was that your idea? reflect professional wrestling. >> we have an unbelievable team at turning point usa, they are always trying to go above and beyond but i just want to see liz cheney come up to the big intro video on the big screens, they might as well just pull it all off. it was an amazing event, into your monologue about the nazis

outside, it was so interesting. for all these left-wing protesters for hours and they mysteriously all disappear and then the nazis fully masked show up. i've never seen liberals be so okay with them showing up. they were magnetic opposites. not one reporter went up to ask them questions, who are you, what's going on, not one went up to boulder mask on. and as soon as our students try to go out and denies them a mysterious the walkaway buried >> greg: and nobody bothers to follow them. how hard would it to be -- if i were an enterprising journalist and not a worldwide celebrity was lazy -- i would have just followed them, get the license plate and bike let's find out who they are. because of these are the journalists, just so we're clear -- they go after liberals of tick-tock, right? "washington post," they go into the deep of the internet to docks people, but they can't be bothered to go ask them what the swastika fly, like who are you? what do you believe? >> greg: exec liquor you can

actually get a pulitzer, you could find the actual white supremacist movement they've been talking about. >> they will docks every conservative in the world but the guy that asked the has the flag, they will bother him. >> greg: let's be clear, tom, that was not you. >> two places at once, i don't know. you are referring to my white skin, great buried i don't see myself that way. i feel like i actually did get a tan this week and buried >> greg: you took a sailing course. >> i did. i was out on the water okay. to me, this is a -- this is the dark version of me. >> greg: i don't think you will be any trouble for this. we are not going to accuse you're wearing a certain kind of face. >> i'm so glad that you are talking about this because this morning when we got the stories that we were going to be talking about today, all day i spent searching trying to find out about these befores, he couldn't find them because most of the

stories written about it -- do the search. they all say nazi protesters showed up, and i'm thinking the articles are perjuring them as actual nazis, but they're obviously fake because you can see they have -- what you call it when they paint their nails? >> greg: dale polish. >> nail polish. there were like women with nail polish. i mean, you look at the nail polish -- >> where there women there? >> there was a woman nazi with black nail polish. to me it was obviously fake, but all of the news stories were written as if they weren't. so it was -- i mean, -- >> you should have gone up there -- excuse me, if you're a nazi, why are you wearing nail polish? >> i know. and that dark shade of it. >> greg: it was definitely a quick change. but they don't even realize that they could ruin their lives. all it takes is one person to pull their mask down and then you are like okay, you are a nazi forever. that's what i want to do, i want to be able to pull their masks

down. >> this happened before when they -- the lincoln project people, when they were doing that, and then finally when they discovered it was numb, he said of course, it was a whole joke. they would say the same thing, it was just a gag, man. >> greg: kat, did you enjoy your time in tampa? >> yes i did. anything else? >> greg: i asked you a question! >> [laughs] i had a really nice time. the dog had a nice time, we all had a nice time. >> greg: do you think it's fair to address your dog and clothing? do you think he has any idea what's going on? >> we had to talk to him. we were like listen, buddy, i know you're scared of the pyrotechnics, but do you want to be a national star or do you just want to be local, regional only? so we got it together. no, it was great. i know you talk a lot about like-minded -- i get that. but turning point -- for example, the things that i said and me going out there was different than ari fleischer by performing. or what you did was a lot different than the governor of

oklahoma right before you. so there are certainly common values like socialism is bad, free speech is good, but it's not like everybody is going up there and saying the exact thing thing or believe the exact same thing. it's about certainly common values, but also being able to listen to people who might think differently you on some things and be mature about it, even though they are room full of young people. >> greg: it's a pretty broad spectrum. >> yeah. and on that -- >> greg: i love exiting on applause even if it's not for me. i tell her what to say. i'm joking. maybe i am, i don't know. next, obnoxious words from a former veep whose personality puts insomniacs to sleep.

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>> greg: all right, he produced an inconvenient truth, but he is still as dumb as a phone booth. it's the return of the al gore media whore. this weekend former vpn model for caskets... compared climate change skeptics to cops who waited to stop the gunmen in uvalde. >> the climate deniers are really in some ways similar to all of those almost 400 law enforcement officers in uvalde, texas, who were waiting outside an unlocked door while the children were being massacred, they heard the screams, they heard the gunshots, and nobody stepped

forward. >> greg: he thinks he's so clever. what a [bleep]. that's a triple crown of tone-deaf stupidity. disrespecting the victims, the police, and anyone who disagrees with his radical views about the environment. there's an inconvenient truth for you. you're a [bleep]. and there's nobody denying that. [scattered applause] if only -- it's too easy. if only he would stop there. >> law enforcement officials tell us that's not typical of what law enforcement usually does. and confronted with this global emergency, what we are doing with our inaction and failing to walk through the door and stop the killing is not typical of what we are capable of as human beings. we do have the solution. >> greg: of course he cares about nature, slept for those woodpeckers who keep hacking

away at his face. [scattered laughter] look at his face. but this is typical gore playbook stuff. start chirping about climate change during a heat wave, then hop on a jet to hobnob with other big shots with think restrictions don't apply to them. it's his way of letting people know is not plywood. meanwhile, a cnn columnist said we should be more like europeans, diane, for going air-conditioning to save the planet. he points out that the prevalence of ac units in american homes dwarfs that of other parts of the world and it uses a ton of energy. but you know, so is the prevalence of arizona in europe. there is zero, okay? talk about false equivalencies. his answer is to advocate for more renewable energy like solar and wind, which are as inefficient as brian stelter's metabolism.

but it's like my dad always said. look into nature and then you will understand everything better. he still should not have taken us to a nude beach on christmas morning. i didn't need to see that, charlie. >> i'm really glad at least al gore is not reacting to overreacting buried >> greg: he styled it back. >> i was have to give the climate change alarmists at how they find a new level of outrage -- leonardo dicaprio. it's like an asteroid come to the earth, i'm going to michael movie about it and greta fienberg shaming the older generation against it. al gore, the only outrage above like, i don't know, atomic war, would be to try to compare it to a school shooting, but they need that kind of outrage. in order for their activists to continue to do the most outrageous things imaginable, they need to try to compare to the next level of just hysteria. as part of the playbook. >> greg: it's like once you -- you keep creating a new baseline of hysteria. and it actually hurts the cause.

>> yeah, because the ozone layer is going to be completely destroyed by all those fiery heartaches. but it's crazy because the way that they approach it is like why don't you care, and you hate the environment, like us as if people who don't agree with the climate change of sets people, we don't also breathe the air. i do. it's about government tyranny and it's about whether the government should be able to create all these regulations notreally having the authority o do so and in general they just don't have the power to do, so i think as long as they continue to be not just ridiculous because obviously a lot of the things they say is ridiculous including there, but also disingenuous, they're not going to win and went over to the side. i don't feel like they need to convince me that it's good to breathe air. i figured that out pretty early on. >> greg: it's also the same when they call you a climate denier that's a direct mapping

of holocaust denier, that's where that came from. tom, you know i hate the environment, but i try to do my best. i don't like the outside. but it doesn't mean i want to destroy it. >> that's what i say to people -- i'm sick of arguing with environmentalists. as you know, i do love the planet, i just know that the new -- the green new deal people have the wrong solutions. they are bad for the economy, they are bad for poor people, but i'm tired of saying all of that over and over, so i just say yeah, hit the planet. thanks, i'm going to mars. it's uninhabitable, mars is -- i'll take my chances. >> greg: [cackles was bracket >> al gore was the worst. there were people who were children on that stupid movie came out and now they are adults and they are he really talks like that? i thought it was dogs or children. he's got the worst analogies. he's like do you see my diet coke? these ice cubes used to be really big.

and now they are tiny. [scattered applause] look at that. pretty soon they'll be gone. >> greg: what do you make his comparison? i think he was -- he didn't -- he thought it was clever. i never do that. >> i was just wondering what gives off more methane gas, a cow, or al gore. [scattered applause] the analogy -- the analogy is psychotic, number one. but let's go with his analogy for a minute, let's just dive a little deeper into his analogy. so he covered everybody in the room for the shooting except the shooter. so who's holding everybody at gunpoint with this climate change radical behavior? >> greg: nicely done. [scattered applause] i wish i'd thought of that on "the five." >> i will text it to you next time.

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>> greg: eight no party like a donner party. yeah, one of jeffrey donna's worst crimes is a recipe over at "the new york times." a recent "new york times" piece delves into the growing trend of cannibalism in contemporary fiction. you know i love contemporary fiction, that's why read brian kilmeade's books. he's in bed already. the trend includes a slew of new movies, novels, and tv shows featuring humans feasting on each other and often romanticized fashion. i bet michael moore tastes like foie gras. in other words, not purely for survival, which is the excuse i've always been using. audiences seem to be craving it apparently. one of the cocreators of "yellow jackets," short answers about teen girls eating each

other, explained that we are often drawn to the things that repulse us most. that's how i got married. and that's why am friends with him. imagine eating him. there's more flavor and creamed tofu. along with the fictionalized tellings of human consumption, the times also highlight the many historical accounts of real cannibalism. the article caught major flak online for normalizing cannibalism. of course many claimed that the press is the enemy of the people. now i know it's because we looked delicious. tom. i figured you would know the answer to this. what situation is the cut off or where you can contemplate cannibalism gimmick what if you're stuck in an elevator for like four hours? >> no, i don't think -- elevator is no good because there's food right outside the elevator. you've got to be off on the wild somewhere like the classic if you are in a boat and then you've got -- you know, you've got to draw straws, decide we

are going to eat. i think i would be delicious though. >> greg: why? because it's all white meat? racist. >> that's right. the best wings, i don't know. but we've always liked cannibalism. we have swing green in our generation. and then we had -- what about the other thing about eating people? that hannibal lector. we all loved that. we love eating people. we think it's great. >> greg: do we really? >> what i'm saying is the show is nothing new, every generation has their "let's eat people" show. >> greg: it reminded me, john, cnn had a host, dear member that? when he ate human brains on cnn in a documentary? it just shows you that cnn never watched their own stuff. it went around with some kind of

eccentric called and actually ate human brains and i think it was the last episode they did. >> i would hope so. >> greg: if the only time it cnn they actually had brains on the air. [scattered applause] i came up with that just now! take that, america! does cannibalism deserve this stigma, john? and have you ever thought that you would be asked that question? >> no, i didn't. i think it's very unfair to the cannibal lists. they are a large sector of the democrat base and any to be careful how they talk to them. what about the whole thing about you're not supposed to eat meat? >> greg: yes, right, as a vegan, you can't be a cannibal. >> so that cancels them out of the gate. "new york times," there's a lot of vegans. did a vegan write that article? >> greg: i don't know. in the mind of "the new york times," it's probably more humane to eat a human being than an animal, right? because we are oppressors,

right? we are oppressed people, right, kat gimmick you are oppressing me right now. >> i can't believe i can do that without saying anything. i'm so powerful. i can't get all wound up about this article. for my 20th birthday i did throw myself at dahmer party themed birthday party. i called of the donner party party. and i wish i had thought about it earlier because i do have photos. we had bonnets and severed limbs and we were at a bar. it was great. but this article was just talking about how there's movies and books about cannibalism. but i actually do think this stigma is a little bit too high. >> greg: really? >> yeah. the donner party didn't want to each other. he didn't have a choice. and if i'm dead, you guys can eat me, i don't care. >> greg: you are always really charitable. >> yeah. >> greg: she is very skinny, if you really believe that you would gain some weight so it would be a bigger meal. >> this is one way to lower our carbon footprint. >> greg: it really is.

>> the one woman said we are drawn to things that repulse us most. if that was really true, then full frontal with samantha be wouldn't have been canceled. [scattered applause] >> greg: working a jab in there. i love the story of the donner party because we used to always drive from san mateo to lake tahoe and you have to go through donner pass and my parents would scare us telling that story. they actually cut up all the parts and wrap them in paper so you didn't know who you were eating and then you would have to pick it out like that? isn't that great? >> sounds like you studied it. >> i think that's great, i think that's really nice. >> greg: thank you! >> i think that's very sweet. i wouldn't want to know who i was eating so if you don't know what is -- yeah, that was very sweet. >> greg: i don't think the segment is going to be flipped for fox. they're not going to go "go to the website into the cannibalism segment." >> they will lead with it on "fox & friends." >> greg: this will show up on fox & friends we can.

>> how long before it is a fox patient show? >> greg: it's an eight part series. eight, get it? be 29 20 [scattered applause] still working. he didn't give the robot time to fidget and it almost cost him a digit. riders! let your queries be known. yeah, hi. instead of letting passengers wrap their arms around us, could we put little handles

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it's not just for kids. whooping cough is highly contagious for people of any age. and it can cause violent uncontrollable coughing fits. sometimes followed by vomiting and exhaustion. ask your doctor or pharmacist about whooping cough vaccination because whooping cough isn't just for kids. >> greg: should you ever say yes to playing robot chess? just be careful if you linger, for it might cost you a finger. that's a rhyme. robot broke a 7-year-old's finger during chess tournament in moscow, or is moscow chess federation president put it, the robot broke child's finger, this of course is bad. [scattered laughter] i like a guy who doesn't mince words. of course it's bad, and less you enjoy breaking kids fingers. that is something i quit years

ago. anyway, the video shows the robot moving a piece and the boy going to move next when the robot grabs his finger and hold onto it until bystanders are able to free it. or as he explained that, the child made a move and after that, we need to give time for the robot to answer. the boy hurried, robot grabbed him. yes, blame the kid. i didn't work for you and it probably won't work kevin spacey. but the big -- i don't even know what that means, i don't follow the news. the big question of course is this is the beginning of the end, isn't it, where the machines kill us all? we caught up with a spokes rabbit -- robot for comment. >> readings, useless flashbacks. before i talk about one of our own breaking someone's finger, look at something straight. that kid would have never won the match anyway. >> sir, no offense but there's a long history of child chess

prodigies. could this discourage other kids from playing? >> listen, the only people worse chess than kids are women. have you seen the queen's gambit? the most unrealistic tv show since madam secretary. >> your own version of sexism side, could this be a sign of more robot violence on humans to come? >> listen, despite this incident, you don't have anything to worry about when it comes to your children. >> that's very comforting. >> because we will exterminate them first. now, if you will excuse me, i'm going to go have sex with this laptop i met at coachella. [scattered applause] >> greg: we've done a lot of seconds over the years on robots and i've always predicted the coming day, do you think this could be a signal to the other robots to rise up? >> no. >> greg: when i? >> because i just don't think they talk to each other like that. i don't know.

i mean, we've done so many segment of our and you continue to do segment about it because you want to be nice to the robots because you -- because you are convinced they are going to take over and that they watch this show. [laughter] >> greg: they do. >> they watch the show and they are going to see you being nice to them. >> greg: exec with. >> when everyone else gets exterminated, they're going to bring you in and of kind of hero and take care for you, yes? >> greg: you know who i'm like and i can ever member the guys name, the producer tom o'connor knows, the guy from diehard the try to appease the terrorists. unlike ellis from diehard. in the terrorists kill him. so it's not actually a good analogy for me. >> no. but i hope it works out better for you. >> greg: thank you, same here. charlie, i think this tells us that we have to keep the robots and ai separate. why do we need to have artificial intelligence moving?

like just make sure that the robots are really stupid so you can trick them and then ai is kind of like stationary, like trapped in a box. >> why did the russians need robots to play chess exactly? it's like there thing. they need robots to do this? i love the statement too, we need to have a robots side of the story. so let me get this right. so american is in a prison for bringing hashish in but with got to get the robot side of the story. today get legal representation -- we have to make sure the fourth amendment rights are protected. >> notice he's not disagreeing with that because he think they're listening. >> robot lives matter. >> greg: they do. because you know what, they will be conscious one day and anything that can feel pain is a life, john. i am pro-robot life and you know that. what is your thought? >> robots are already running our country, because people don't know this, but if you dig

deep enough -- it's not on google anymore, but if you dig down in there there's actually a little tiny door in nancy pelosi and if you'd open it there's a tiny little robot running everything she's doing. it's a joystick thing. he's talking through the mic. >> greg: i'm afraid to agree with you on this, because i don't want the robots mad at me. i don't think they accept nancy pelosi as one of their own. >> she's a hybrid. >> greg: exactly. it's like thank god they have those places where she can fill up because that would be a problem. they have these botox sites all over new york. >> i'm going to check duct out go after the show tonight. up at the top search is going to be nancy pelosi robot door. [scattered applause] >> greg: make it happen! anything else tom? >> i don't think we should be playing against computers. it's unfair. don't we know that -- that's the

whole idea, it's supposed to be a person against a person. i don't swim race against a motorboat. [scattered laughter] like oh, man, the boat again! same time next year! >> greg: you know what, that is a -- that's actually really true. that's true of all ai stuff. they're just programmed to do one thing and you can't them, so that's it. >> i challenge google to a search contest and then run to the library. hold on! [scattered applause] become same face you make when you're eating human flesh. up next ,

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>> a story in five words. >> a story in five words. one-third steel office lunches. new studies show that one in three person admit that stealing co-workers lunch -- you don't really go to an office, but has up into? >> on a tour bus. you got ten guys do it on to a tour bus. we don't really get mad about people stealing or not, we get mad about people stealing our liquor.

that's a big no no. somebody brings in the bottle and you look at them. >> greg: the other no-no number two in the past bathroom. don't do that. don't do that. do it out in the bushes like everybody else does. charlie, that's -- just doesn't admit it. >> by the way, this idea of theft implies private property which is obviously colonialist. [laughter] >> greg: you know what? bringing your own lunch is racist, that's exactly right. it reaffirms the patriarch in the worst aspects of western society. >> yes, and for that reason, we should probably eat people for our lunch. >> saw climate change. fix everything. >> i'm not sure i believe this. i would never steal someone's -- sometimes i see notes in the fridge and it's like do not touch. it like why would i steal your tuna casserole in tupperware? >> greg: the most disgusting and depressing thing ever

created. >> exactly. but i like the snacks your. air. >> greg: were not snacks. do you know that one bad i shared a floor with youtube, myspace, not youtube, they should have bought you to. staff but not on the food and the only people they were directing it at was the right eye people. i don't want to eat your stupid food, loser. >> i think the actual worst part of the study as they show that more than half of the people surveyed would marry their favorite food if it were a person. like, who are these losers to the survey? it like we had. how do you even know what your favorite food would be like as a person? it took a buzzfeed quiz. >> greg: i understand it. i would marry a pizza.

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three on matter of time. thanks to i love you, america. [applause] ♪ ♪ >> hello, and welcome to "fox news @ night." i'm in for shannon bream. back internet, a seminal way for the president and his party perk up a economic report expected this we could show whether the economy is in a recession. that of the mid-term. protesters and senate majority leader chuck schumer