i made a thing. >> that's beautiful. >> this is barack's sweater i did for him. >> laura: it's really nice. she can learn a thing or two. those sweaters are awesome. thank you for watching tonight. gutfeld and the gang up next. ♪ >> happy monday! [ applause ] i hope you had a great weekend. i did. after i cleared up the misunderstanding with the park police. when did restroom custodians

start working undercover. it appears that the mexican government is using video of homeless people from philadelphia in a national ad campaign to try to scare young people away from drugs. take a look at this. [speaking spanish] >> speak english? a third world country taking shots at a failed democrat-run city.

it depicts brotherly love better than two guys sharing a dirty needle. only city worse off in philly is pompeo. they had an excuse. one volcano erupts and they call it a day. not bothering to build it back up. grow a pair. people objected to being filmed. that's another problem. these scenes were filmed in public. unlike those videos came from the locker room at the ymca. got a shampoo bottle with a hole in it. it's hard to give consent when your pants are down on the sidewalk. you want that guy to sign a

waiver? you need a pair of salad tongs. mexico is the big source of fentanyl that killed hundreds of thousands of americans. mexico tells their people, do not be like our customers. it's like ronald mcdonald telling ronald jr. to lay off the big mac. it's the best advice. don't get high on your own supply. it's a favorite advice corner drug dealers and the hobby shop where i buy my glue. it's awesome saying, stay away from philly. yeah, it's sad. we have reached a point where we're now the travel hazards. not the other countries.

>> hello folks. >> we're being spontaneous and taking a trip. what's the next flight out? >> it's very last minute. all i got left is philadelphia and fallujah. >> that's right down the mill for me. >> do you have a recommendation? >> well, they're the same frankly. i hear iraq is really nice this time of year. >> okay. fallujah here we come. >> here's your tickets here is your body armor. sorry, that's for philadelphia. >> that makes sense >> enjoy your flight. [ applause ] >> we can laugh at this. who's got a better policy? mexico or us?

in new york guy was arrested for 20,000 fentanyl pills. he was charged with criminal possession and released on his on recognizance. what did they think he'll do next? return to his job in finance? get back to squash lessons. he's now currently at an orphan average reading bedtime stories. the problem with society, we made low grade addiction incompatible. it's far from perfect. but still, cat comes in to work several times a week

>> why you still laughing at that. [ laughter ] >> we don't do that with opioids. we punish the legal patient and let the illegal stuff flow. what does that sound like? gun control. targeting the law-abiding and letting the law breakers go free. you know how well that works. the casualties are mainly the young because they take the risk. 100 years ago they boozed from the bathtub and sometimes they died. the same thing would happen if you drank from my bathtub today. i haven't cleaned it since he first episode of "red eye" same thing happens with fentanyl. that's because our job policy made recreational drug use worse than russian roulette.

there is little if any data on who's dying. that's weird. when you see that video of the philly zombies, how many do do you think there's still alive? may be i should start pooping outdoors. [ laughter ] let's welcome tonight's guests. she's as hot as gravy and still serves in the navy, former state department spokeswoman. [ applause ] he's the war vet who looks good

wet. rob smith. when he heard men can get pregnant, he went on maternity leave. writer comedian, joe mackey! and finally, she's got a case of the mondays, and ebola. joe, welcome back. i can't even tell you had the surgery. [ laughter ] >> great to be back. i'm a little behind on the news stuff. we're happy you're not cnn plus. that went away but you came back. >> i'm happy to be here. great studio audience.

[ applause ] >> i brought you back here so i can tell you to leave. when other countries start using america as a cautionary tale, that is quite a message. >> it's bad. it's interesting instead of saying, some of the criticism was justified, they make it seem like drug addicts were victims because they were anymored in public. >> they played techno music? >> they do. >> that's a good point. anything else you like to add?

>> yeah, it's very interesting. philadelphia almost acted like a drug addict when you call them on the problem, they throw it back at you. when people say joe you're addicted to snacking, i say, your girlfriend left you for carnival carl. his name was carl. >> welcome. once again, you just out dress everybody. [ applause ] i do comment on what people wear at work. why is it not a national security issue? >> it is. i think it's the most national security issue. when you have other nations criticizing the u.s., you have a

narco state that's telling philadelphia that you have a drug problem. that's kind of bad. >> that's when the dealer say, pull back on the heroin. >> why didn't biden meet with xi jinping, leader of chinese community party, the chemical precursor from fentanyl come from china. it's the number one killer of young people in our country. climate change is clearly more important than getting a statistic on how many people actually die from this. >> you have no idea. except that it doubled. they used to say overdoses. it's always fentanyl mixed with caffeine or another drug. i read a lot of it. i don't think i got any smarter. what do you make of this? what should biden have done? >> i don't know. biden should have probably had a

spine. that will be expecting too much much. when we saw that commercial, that party looked incredible. i wanted to go to that party. it's very interesting. they to outsource the footage to the drug addicts on the streets. i was wondering is there some sort of like weird failed democratic city getty image where is they can find videos outside of mcdonald's or people shooting up outside of preschool. >> i seen that video a lot. it's video where everybody's faces are blurred. it's been around since slow motion. it's incredibly -- it doesn't look like america. it doesn't look like anything. >> i've been to both to iraq and

philadelphia. i will prefer iraq. >> anybody here from philly? never got out. so sad. what do you make of this? by the way, what do you make for legalization, should that dude with 20,000 pills be left go? >> i don't believe that drug crimes are crimes. i don't think that -- you should be able to buy pills where you know there's no fentanyl in it. all those people out on the street, they might be doing fentanyl on purpose. it's not like someone one of the youths will see that video and be like, oh, i guess i won't go to that fentanyl party on purpose.

>> 20,000 pills. >> it's a lot. it's probably not people saying i like to by fentanyl please. >> they are putting them in cocaine and ecstasy pills. some kids might want to do party drug and they die. >> that's why they don't have the right numbers. >> i care. that's the kind of person i am. a liar. up next, critics say chappelle attacked the jews. customizes your home insurance, here's a pool party. ♪ good times. insurance! ♪ only pay for what you need. ♪ liberty. liberty. liberty. liberty. ♪ when you're through with powering through, it's time for theraflu hot liquid medicine.

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>> gutfeld: anti-semitism takes

crack at chappelle. dave chappelle hosted "saturday night live" this weekend. the show was funny. also, his monologue is called anti-semitic by the head of the anti-defamation league. giving chappelle much needed break from being called transphobic. he drew ire when he joked about kanye west recent anti-semitic remarks. >> there are two words in the english language that should never say together. those words are the and jews. [ laughter ] never heard someone do good after they said that. show business rules. this is the rule. the rules of deception. if they are black it's a game. if they are italian it's a mob. if they are jewish it's a

coincidence. you should never speak about it. >> gutfeld: the rest of the 15 minute monologue went the same way. this cause liberals to clutch their pearls. here's more. >> i've been to hollywood. i'm just telling you. this is what i saw. it's a lot of jews. [ laughter ] like a lot. that don't mean anything. there's a lot of black people in ferguson, missouri, that doesn't mean they run the place. >> gutfeld: he pulls you in and he sets it straight. does he know they were jewish? how does he know ferguson residents just sarah silverman and jimmy kimmel? now you're awake. later, he brought it all back to

kanye. >> i can see if he had some kind of issue. he might go out to hollywood and he might start connecting some alliance. let the jews run show business. not a crazy thing to think. it's a crazy thing to say out loud in a climate like this. [ laughter ] >> gutfeld: the next morning, adl ceo tweeted. disturbing to see "snl" not just normalize but popularize anti-semitism. why is jewish trauma diminished. did chappelle step over the line? was the anti-defamation league leadership too sensitive. he got people to watch "snl" and laugh. rob, you were saying in the green room that, of course the jews run hollywood. [ laughter ]

>> that was exactly what i was saying. >> gutfeld: we got to go to break. >> i will say this. black men have been getting in lot of trouble for this whole thing lately. the purpose of this segment identifies asians. [ laughter ] i am asian for five more minutes. when it comes to this -- you know, kanye lost $1 billion of his net worth. that happened to me, i will be -- what i will say, i think that what chappelle great at is making us uncomfortable through humor. my thing with these off color humor, it can't be racist,

sexist, homophobic, anti-semitic if i laughed. >> gutfeld: you're saying funny overrides everything. >> there used to be a comedian who told the craziest racist jokeses. i always laughed. >> gutfeld: she was amazing on those roasts. did she pass away? >> i think she's still around. i was never offended. she never told any anti-asian jokes. i hope that my people -- >> gutfeld: i hope your people can overcome this. morgan, you're jewish? correct? >> yes. >> gutfeld: morgan, you are jewish. before he started his monologue, chappelle read a statement denouncing anti-semitism. did that not matter? >> he's my favorite comedian of all-time. after you, of course.

he's the guy that -- he's the comedian that came up about back bush during the height of the iraq war. i think there's a big difference intent. he was being funny. kanye was being a [ bleep ]. it wasn't funny. he was making fun of everyone. he made fun of herschel walker. we need to lighten up. there's lots of real anti-semitism in the world. >> gutfeld: what do you think? >> i applaud. [ applause ]

>> applaud the jewish woman. let's go to you, cat. raised catholic? polish? >> yes. >> gutfeld: thoughts? >> i think that all the articles about this, they wrote before he did it. they replaced transphobic with anti-semitic. he's making jokes. when it comes to the anti-defamation league, this isn't really new. they had a problem with jone rivers years ago referencing the holocaust in a joke. jone rivers is anti-semitic, she's terrible at it. >> gutfeld: i know she is dead. >> she is dead. her late husband lost all of his family in the holocaust. when it comes to jokes, it's really not that serious. joking is the opposite of serious. >> gutfeld: how can a joke be defamation if it's a joke? why is the anti-defamation

wasting their time chasing a joke when they should be -- you're not the anti-joke league. you're anti-defamation league. i saved the joke for last season professional comedian. makes people laugh across the country over the globe. >> i'm the second favorite comedian. [ laughter ] chappelle used lot of nuance. he said he thought kanye was not well when he made those statements. comedians exaggerate and say things they don't think are true. when he said that kanye got in so much trouble, he got kyrie in trouble. kyrie got in trouble on his own. i do that all the time. i had a joke about how --

>> gutfeld: execute more women. >> i don't think that's true. [ laughter ] >> gutfeld: you got nothing against women. i want to play this one sot the thing where he talked about trump. you can hear a pin drop. >> reason he's love because people in ohio never seen somebody like him. never seen white male billionaire screaming at the top of the lung. his whole system is rigged. across the stage was white woman hillary clinton and barack obama saying, no it's not. he said i know the system is rigged, because i use it. with that my friends, the star was born. [ laughter ] >> gutfeld: i don't think the audience wanted to hear that. he understood. he can take you to the middle of

a problem and almost get people different sides to agree. i'm kind of like that. >> i'm actually shocked that a liberal audience at "snl" in new york city did not like that joke. literally. >> gutfeld: i will later. up next, if you have a maskless plan, you might as well join the clan. lincoln's witnessed a good bit of history. even made some themselves. makes you wonder... what will they do for an encore? ♪

>> gutfeld: they say you're a racist if you don't slap a mask on your facist. modern medicine hits the skid when they want to permanently mask your kid. according an article in new england journal of medicine, covid masks can help fight racism. hear them out.

[ applause ] that was easy. the author of the study say we believe that universal masking may be especially useful for mitigating effects of structure rail racism in schools. including potential deepening of educational inequities. masking will mitigate structural racism and educational inequities. no it won't. you know what reduces racism, a good [ bleep ] education. learning to read and write. it's not about the a mac. it's about teacher's union. what a bunch of psychopath. study suggest that covid have even impact on minorities. it was a natural experiment from

79 school districts. you don't find what you aren't looking for. i'm pretty sure he murdered my aunt. we though this is b.s. masks have nothing to do with racism unless joy reid is dressing up for halloween. the experts want your kids to mask up and shut up. prepare for healthcare to get worse for everyone unless you identify as a black woman with a swollen prostate. cat what is going on? this is the medical community. can't it be redeemed? >> if you put potential and may, you can say whatever you want. the whole idea -- this is surrounding mask mandates. you have no idea people wearing the masks or not. if you wanted to, you can flip

it. say that actually, it's racist to wear a mask because these kids had to wear masks in these schools. therefore, they will be more likely to suffer delays associated with wearing masks. you can thrill it. they are only used to viewing everything through one lens. everything is racist. >> gutfeld: very good. [ laughter ] joe, you're a racist. [ laughter ] i don't throw that term around lightly. i admire your guts coming out and talking about it in front of this audience. is this about control? people saying it's about control. is it about control or is it about concern? >> i think it's about control. it's another health crises they are using to exploit people like climate change is a health

problem. gun violence is something they've been using for power. even biden's dementia. they didn't control any variables in the study. some of those kids could have had most of the kids in class. they try to line up more people on one side and have those people insult the other people that don't agree with them. that's high school. it makes people comedians. [ laughter ] >> gutfeld: i think that comedy could be a health problem. we can say that it's a health problem. jokes and made people feel bad. >> the thing i hate about this

everything is racist conversation t really does to diminish i in-- in our society. we experience these things. i think that everything is racist crowd is such a grip. it's almost like i want to do the opposite. i want to get $50,000 a speech to say nothing is racist. that will be my retirement >> is putting a bag over everyone's head the best way to solve racism? >> it depends on the person. i can only hear avenue cue the musical everyone is cool. we're in new york city,

everybody knows av avenue cue. >> i think music is for losers. >> gutfeld: this is a national show. get off your high horse. swamp person -- >> i live in nashville. maybe you should watch the show once in a while. >> is that right off the air? i apologize. >> is it that easy? [ laughter ] >> i don't remember what the question is. i think something about masks.

she said this isn't about science. this is politics. that's the danger we had this general trust in the medical community -- it's so stupid, they continue to denigrate everyone's trust in the medical community and science. >> gutfeld: whether it goes t spoils everything. i hate political hot tubs. coming up, they asked old women and men if they like to live again. kevin?!?!?.... hey, what's going on? i'm right here! i was busy cashbacking for the holidays with chase freedom unlimited. i'm gonna cashback on a gingerbread house! oooh, it's got little people inside! and a snowglobe. oh, i wished i lived in there. you know i can't believe you lost another kevin. it's a holiday tradition! that it is!

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it's golo. it's all golo. it's smarter, it's better, it will change your life forever. clunky beige, plastic... or... presto... you choose. better hearing made virtually invisible. that's that eargo difference. >> gutfeld: how many of you are keen to hop inside the time machine. third of seniors can relive their lives. if they can relive any decade of that i life, 30% of senior citizens will choose their 20s and quarter will pick their

20s. 100% say leave us alone we're watching laura ingraham. more than half would choose to relive their early decade. in other words, they really hate their grandkids. [ laughter ] good thing social security won't be around for them. take that junior. it's worth noting only a third of seniors said they would want to relive any part of their lives at all. repeating history isn't just fun. i wonder, does that mean that rest of them are not happier than they're ever been? is it all due to relief factor which is there to numb the pain. stuff is amazing. i put it in my coffee. when asked what advice they give to the younger generation. many responded with answers such as be prepared, be humbled and eliminate negative thoughts. that's easy for them to say when

they know what happened. next time i visit tijuana for spring break, i won't be 49. morgan, i heard you said in the green room, you were such a wild party animal in your 20s. i don't know how you made it out alive. you wanted to relive it so you can remember it. >> you know i never smoked weed. that's how much a dork i am. >> gutfeld: you're so uncool, let's beat her up. >> i missed being skinny and eat whatever i want. >> gutfeld: when you were skinny, you didn't have enough money to eat what you want. >> are you trying to say i'm not skinny now? [ laughter ] >> gutfeld: i deserve it! i was great looking when i was younger. i didn't have any money. now after all the money i need. i can buy and sell you in a

second. i still am good looking. i guess i won. >> you sure did. [ laughter ] even i smoke weed. [ laughter ] i'm surprised no one went zero to ten. i wouldn't have near many questions or near perfect bladder control. >> gutfeld: you can solve lot of problems. >> i will do it again and own less mc hammer kicks. >> gutfeld: rob, do you buy this stuff? >> i do not look kindly on my 20s.

i was fat and broke. no, those weren't the best years of my life. then i got ripped and hot and i'm having lot more fun now than i was in my 20s. >> gutfeld: the present day rob will go back to the early rob and go in your 20ss, you would start getting in shape now. >> yes, that's my weird at all. i would hit on myself in my 20s. >> gutfeld: that's a great premise for a movie. >> i'm way lucky now than i was in my 20s. >> gutfeld: that's true.

>> i took a chinatown bus from new york to columbus, ohio. >> gutfeld: i can't remember that bus on seinfeld. >> one time they left me at the gas station because i took too long. my life was so -- i wasn't even that stressed. [ laughter ] this gas station is far from the worse thing that happened to me this week. >> gutfeld: i used to walk very long distances. because i figured, i'll get home somehow. i would wall walk across the city without money. >> i would freak out.

back then, we'll see when the next one comes. >> gutfeld: up next, kids christmas celebratiofirsn gets downsized by inflation. somethin. i started cosentyx®. cosentyx can help you move, look, and feel better... by treating the multiple symptoms of psoriatic arthritis. don't use if you're allergic to cosentyx. before starting...get checked for tuberculosis. an increased risk of infections some serious... and the lowered ability to fight them may occur. tell your doctor about an infection or symptoms... or if you've had a vaccine or plan to. tell your doctor if your crohn's disease symptoms... develop or worsen. serious allergic reactions may occur. watch me. ask your rheumatologist about cosentyx. are you tired of clean clothes that just don't smell clean? downy unstopables in-wash scent boosters keep your laundry smelling fresh waaaay longer than detergent alone. if you want laundry to smell fresh for weeks, make sure you have downy unstopables in-wash scent boosters.

>> gutfeld: a story in five words. the toys are getting smaller.

toyses are expected to be smaller and cheaper due to inflation. will this affect the toys you're purchasing? [ laughter ] i'm sorry. it just popped in my head. you have a baby. you got to get toys. >> she's jewish, she's not getting christmas toys. >> gutfeld: that's right! that sucks. [ laughter ] i always felt bad for the jewish kids. >> we have hanukkah. >> gutfeld: i don't understand hanukkah. i didn't meet my first one until i was 50.

joe. you not only make toys. you are a toy. a wind up wooden soldier. >> thank you, i thought of pinocchio joke was coming there. just blame santa claus. tell the kids they were bad. this an opportunity for improvement. lot of times, other generation think the younger generation is bad. now it's true. kids are like i only have three phones. >> gutfeld: that is true. they will term they've been bad. you seeing so much smaller. >> i honestly think this is not a joke. i think that 2023 and '24 will be rough economy wise. i'm not surprised that

shrinkflation made it to fischer price. >> gutfeld: shrinkflation, i like that, that sound kinky. cat, if i had a kid, i would have a big -- a huge box with tiny little toy in it. i think it will be funny. >> no you wouldn't, that will require you to instruct that. you know what's crazy? if you went into a coma and the spring of last year. you woke up on black friday. you be like why all these people fighting on regular stuff. >> gutfeld: you're in a coma and you wake up because you think you're bigger because all the products are smaller.

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i knew that i needed help. and when i reached out, they gave me tools to better my life. they truly saved my life. >> out of time. thank you our studio audience. trace gallagher is next. good evening and welcome to america's lightning is of fox new @ night. i'm trace gallagher in los angeles. >> breaking tonight, the razor thin and gotten gossamer governors race has been called but maybe not so fast a recount could be on the horizon meantim in the house of representatives republicans are one seat away from controlling the chamber. by the slimmest of her art margins but for others who migh take the gavel from speak up on