today she dazzled us with her skills. >> during women's history month, we celebrate and honor the women who made history throughout history who saw what could be unburden by what have been. >> wow. forget my angle advise. trump and desantis with her on the ticket, don't have a chance. >> happy wednesday, everyone! [applause] happy wednesday, everyone! especially we don't have many wednesdays left. it is that time again, the end is here, all hope is loss.

no, steve doocy did not get his own show. forget about inflation or our increasingly bela coast or our drag queen story hour. >> a real threat to humanity, it is never gone away. it is delivery day that keeps on getting changed. "the new york times" delivered this ominous warning. climate change is speeding catastrophe. earth is likely to cross a critical threshold for global warming for the next decade. the nation would need to make an immediate and drastic shift from boston fuels to prevent the

planet being dangerously on that level. [laughter] >> according to a new report released on monday. it eerily sounds like the same one. al gore and the rest of these fear-mongering -- have been screaming at us for the last 40 years. [applause] >> yeah! yeah. haha, so what, you peasants need to suffer or the whole world would be doomed. that contradicts the whole report. many scientists pointed out that surpassing the 1.5 degree threshold does not mean humanity is doomed. wait a second, wait, we are not doomed? [ bleep ] why did you say so to begin with? i am sure this so-called threshold is arbitrary. it is funny though the headline

screams catastrophe but halfway through it, they say never mind. the shocking news is not so shocking at all. imagine if that's how i call 911, huh? everyone is going to die! why? my fan broke. [laughter] >> what a bunch of shock blockers. it is not like 12,000 years ago there was a giant glazers right where i'm siting. no one blames that on one of my many yachts. we have been down this road before like many few years, like my entire life. i am 85 years old. i know i look great. it is all about hydration and a healthy sex life. is that right, bellinda? [laughter] these experts keep moving the gulf post because they were not

predicting the end of the world in the mayans. 2012 was the last time i donated to charity because i thought the world is ending. what's the point, huh? then they started picking for their doomsday fixed again. they say the sky is falling. when the only thing is falling is this guy on the stairs of air force one. [applause] how often are we to keep hearing this? >> the world is going to end in 12 years if we don't address climate change. >> yeah, right? if that's true, why are you in such great shape? if the world is ending, there is no need for a beach body. hell, i will blow up like brian stelter and die in a bed made of chocolate eclairs. [laughter] >> imagine if it was not climate

ideology being pushed of something just fallible like a ponzi schemes but we were forced to treat it with this respect. you node to give more money to the bernie-made off institute. that's climate activism. you can't trust an addict. the apocalypse is always around the corner and we turn that corn ir and it is nothing. it is the next corner and the next. they got more corners than a haunted corn maze. why? because it is incentivized. you do this grift, the world opens up to you.

that's an incentive and not just for attention starved kids but attention starved adults as well. the former teen will receive the award from the faculty of the university of helsinki. she's the first one to hold the title of doctor while also needing one. theology? if i remember and i remember a lot of greeks, that's from the word theo which means dr. cliff huxable of only sun. i guess they are admitting that climate change is a religion and it is. just like jonestown. [applause] let's welcome tonight's guests. as a divorced comedian, he

specializes in disappointing kids and audiences. actor/writer and comedian jay reed. oh! [applause] >> she came up with the idea to put bank pins on little chains, fox business, liz mcdonald. she's itching for a fight or has leads. fox's contributor, kat timpf. >> it was one time. >> finally, he had to couch down, my side kick in the heavyweight champion, tyrus. [applause] >> jamie, obviously, we always point out because it is the only interesting thing about you. is that you living in alaska, everything else is boring and sad and depressing. we try to focus on the fact that

you live in ta state far away that nobody goes to and it is super cold? what are your thoughts on climb change living in a place that's literally freezing. >> you said everything about my life is depressing and added that i live in alaska. [laughter] >> yeah, bring it on, it is freezing. bring on the increasing climate. it could be the end of humanity. >> yeah. >> in five years. oh my god, i saved the right amount of money for retirement. [laughter] >> evrp>> everybody is a sucker! you won. >> that's right. >> is it at some point an honorary degree like a slap in the face to people that got a real degree? >> absolutely. >> it would be like humanity like if you are at a restaurant and someone's choking and -- oh my god, do you have a doctor in the house and you look up and it

is jill biden and you are like -- what are you going to do? educate them while they die? [laughter] >> by the way, i heard you were saying about skipping school. she organized a friday strike. if you are going to protest in college, it is smart to do something that college kids want to do anyway. i did a lot of stuff in college that was successful, sleep-in for sovereignty on monday and i would bring all the guys for ladies' night and try to get a peace for peace. [laughter] >> i feel like it worked out. [laughter] >> liz, the difference in like all these kinds of activism is in climate activism, there is an incentive to do it even if it is wrong because of the amount of exposure you get. you don't get it with anything

else, right? >> yes, i am hearing john kerry and al gore is flying to hawaii to talk about the report. if someone makes a point that's well-taken, you can't disapprove of what they're saying in realtime. it is incentives of what is joe biden going to do next? what pete buttigieg is going to do? declare the golden state bridge is racist? what are they going to do next? it is interesting to push back on what they are saying and really point out the climate of hypocrisy of why can't they zoom or skype? why do they have to fly to the bahamas to talk about this? >> yeah, we have to be there in person because the problem is so urgent that we have to be there in person. it may run short with my spf. >> or eating a cheese danish. >> orrp>> how are you doing?

>> i am good. >> are you upset that kat -- no, greta. >> easy to get us confused. >> she's got an honorary doctor and you don't. >> for her, alarmism. i also have alarmism. not like that the world is going to be over.

>> for the normal well adjusted people among us after so many times prooufrn wrong that they're not going to believe it. >> i once created a story of "the boy cried wolf," i don't know if you have heard of that? >> did i go too far? >> there is always a plot twist. p >> i thought there was li wolf and he died from climate change. [laughter] >> yes, that's what it was. >> you have a question? >> m. knight? > i enjoyed the knock in th cabin. >> you are about to get a knock in the head if you don't -- [laughter] >> what did you think? is there anything that deserves a panic like this?

>> no. i get the hustle and i am mad that i didn't think about it. you know with all the problems going on, we have to fly to the bahamas to get to the bottom of this. why are we sitting on this to reconvene? where do you want to go? anywhere place you want to be? >> anywhere. >> we got to go down there to figure out how to be funny. there is not laughter in the world. there is five mass distinctions in this planet. at one time antarctica is a beautiful rain forest. it is going to be fine. we may not be around, but the planet is going to be fine and may be something new. >> yeah. >> you can't stop it. when you create a monster that you can inflate and you keep going -- we got five years. two years gone by, we got seven years. i am seriously.

12 years. we have ruined her childhood but now she's a young adult with a doctorate already. she's got a pretty good childhood so she's going to keep going. >> well, that was fun. up next, the da who does not lift a finger but wants to put trump through the ringer. [applause] the new chase ink business premier card is made for people like sam who make...? ...everyday products... ...designed smarter. like a smart coffee grinder - that orders fresh beans for you. oh, genius! for more breakthroughs like that... ...i need a breakthrough card... like ours! with 2.5% cash back on purchases of $5,000 or more... plus unlimited 2% cash back on all other purchases! and with greater spending potential, sam can keep making smart ideas... ...a brilliant reality! the new ink business premier card from chase for business. make more of what's yours. oh! it's daylight saving time.

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he's stupid and plumped and targeting trump. for the common criminal, the prosecution is minimal. it is time for -- >> this city streets are a disaster so it is the former

president he's going after? it is alvin bragg's repelling adventure. [laughter] >> i don't know how i feel about that? >> alvin bragg may indict trump any day now alleging he paid hush money to stormy daniels. it is a testament to how crime-free new york city is, otherwise, you don't have time for crap like this. it will make bragg the first prosecutor to arrest the former president. hey, fact, excuse me. of course, all while letting deranged criminals tossing asians in front of trains. in the city, prosecutions are dropping 25% even though shootings rose by 102%. bragg blames the new law but it

was his policies on crime that's soft on his flabby-ass. he's so soft on crime. [applause] >> yeah, he's downgrading misdemeanors for not seeking sentences. but, he's ready to throw the back at trump telling how republican lawmakers who'll not be intimidated. well, at least throwing a book burns calories. the media is laughing at this idiot. the video also corral two antitrumpers in zoomed in so it appears they were one of many. the press far outnumbered protesters. i have seen an exaggeration on that since jussie waters claimed

to know the whole alphabet. it seems to me that this is now becoming hilarious. >> it is unbelievable -- it is astounding is what we are seeing in realtime. trump is about to be arrested within days and now by the hours. this is eroding and falling apart. now, robert costello is saying i gave you 321 e-mails. you cherry picked six. that's what he's saying. you took them out of context. this is eroding by the hour and by the way, what are taxpayers paying for? under alvin bragg, do the crime and don't do the time? so where is his focus? what they want to know is -- they're going to go after whether or not the white house or doj were talking to alvin

bragg before they try to bring on this case. >> this is so sweet. part of me is so angry, tyrus, of the situation? of new york because this is what the da is doing. >> if there is going to be a place to be arrested, let it be new york. he won't miss his tea time in mar-a-lago. [laughter] >> especially, if he gets aggressive. >> if he punches one of the arresting officers. here is the thing, they can't arrest the president on a tuesday, can't be a wednesday or a thursday. it has to be friday. we'll be stuck for the whole weekend talking about it. >> right. >> all this is about is he needs to make the walk. they have to. cnn needs this. they need this. if anyone is watching any of this coverage -- they need this. [applause] they have got 47 panelists per

show with families to feed. last night they're like we are going to play the interview that his lawyer said last year. god, they're so excited. there is no case? do something. pick a fight with them. we have to arrest them on friday. they are really, really afraid because their chosen one, the great, well, he did bring us all together because we are pissed. their president and their administration is failing miserably. the coup they put up for four years to get rid of the orange monster, there is a chance he may be gaining momentum and coming back? >> right, there is giving him the oxygen. >> you got to have the handcuffs. >> that's the thing, kat. the media is doing the same thing in 2016. it is handing oxygen over to trump. >> the media would have to say a lot of the opposite stuff they said because the whole thing they have to prove here is the

only reason payment was made of the election, it was a campaign thing. >> right. >> all the puns were saying it is so horrible that he's cheating on his pregnant wife. it would only be the voters that don't want the voters the find out. the same voters who they spent years saying does not matter what he does and they don't even care. >> right. >> if you want to say why he should be or convicted here. all you have to look at the things that antitrumpers were saying -- it is really flimsy. there is a million reason why you don't want it public. >> jamie, do they water coolers up in alaska? what are they saying around those water coolers? >> we have ice coolers and we stand right inside of them. [laughter] >> we fish and we bathe.

>> they say new york criminal cases are similar to my comedy show. 70% of them are thrown out. [laughter] >> it is funny when i don't mumble. [laughter] >> the stormy daniels thing is a joke. it is going to dissolve and go away. i am not a big porn guy and even when i watch it, i only watch two or three minutes. >> right. >> but -- [laughter] >> like -- trump paid this woman and he slept with a porn star and he paid her hush money. if i slept with a porn star, i would paid her tell everybody money. >> go ahead. >> i was going to say times are hard and they asked me to record some psa for some advise. >> okay, do you want to roll

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coolers. here they are again. many are swiping real utensils from their workplace kitchen. people are stealing from the office which is challenging given so many of them work at home. does not make sense. offices are becoming more eco-friendly, their kitchen is replacing utensils with regular user ones. according to the journal, the kitchen capers got so bad at one shared workplace, there was a quote, "angry standoff" between employees over who had been stealing over the cutlery. >> last time there was a fight like that, the girls at "the view" trying to steal a

cinnabon. >> they're thinking of putting id chips into the cutery to keep track of them? >> this is about environmentalism or because of me, too? >> no one is banging our secretaries anymore so there is no office drama like there used to be. when people stop banging each other, the most interesting thing -- who's taking all the forks home? [lau [laughter] you guys are sick. [laughter] >> oh man. >> it is all about the forking. tyrus -- [laughter] >> it is still funny? what are you laughing? >> i see whoopi's enjoying

fighting over that cinnabon. >> that's something worth fighting for. >> was i wrong? >> yeah, thank you for your service. >> it is been a first time and in a long time that you have been in the office, right? >> usually, i am not the office guy. i usually come into look for somebody owing somebody's money. this is that one angry employee probably named karen or rachel that's furious because they bring in their - nobody shares silverwares at work. there is no company's forks. nobody does that. you think about that. there is company's dishwasher and everyone taking turn washing dishes? no, somebody left a fork from home and left it in the sink and accused everybody in the office and turns out to be in the backseat of their car. >> i keep my forks in the glove

compartment. i don't know why i brought that up. jamie, you were telling me in the green room that you love to steal our office supplies from the green room to give to your kids for christmas? that's desperate but really clever. do they like getting coffee paper and coffee pots? >> it really were. i give my kids a bunch of chips. i gave my girlfriend tea bags -- [laughter] [applause] >> by the -- >> a plot twist. >> there is a 92-year-old in the audience that was applauding that joke. >> i looked over and she was applauding. >> she loves tea. [laughter] >> i said tea. i was laughing too about those girls stealing a cinnabon. those "view" girls would have

trouble splitting four cinnabons. [laughter] >> that's what i was thinking. >> could you just have one each? [laughter] >> it is so simple. >> they have four but they split all of them into fours. [laughter] >> and the little republicans didn't get any. >> there is no reason to fight. yes, i was looking more into this because the story is so insane for me. why are their forks at work? they're going against the disposable ones. they're really good if you are looking to limit your calories. basically the straw dissolves before you finish your drinks. yeah, you are done with that. i heard brian stelter used to bring his own utensils to cnn because they're always using his

to shelter the parking lot. [laughter] >> i am sorry, i stole a straw once. i had a one-night stand and in the morning i had a breakfast with the girl. it was not just as fork. i took everything with my dna on it. [laughter] >> so where is the girl now? [laughter] >> never mind -- >> sorry, grandma. >> she lives in the house i bought. >> that's what i was looking for. >> liz, are you covering this interesting story on "fox business," what's your take on it? >> we are tracking it. >> are you going to do live hits? >> we want to know what tyrus is saying. who would want to work at a company where they have communal forks? i love the british story where the husband told the wife you

got to bring silverware back. what do you do when you take the stuff and had to bring it back? >> i can't believe they're making people bringing it back? >> what about people working from home? my neighbor steals his own in the shower. [laughter] >> yeah, all right, oh, my favorite segment ever. hometown scoop from our little group. [applause] >> local news! i'm your overly competitive brother. check. psych! and i'm about to steal this game from you just like i stole kelly carter in high school. you got no game dude, that's a foul! and now you're ready to settle the score. game over. and if you don't have the right home insurance coverage, well, you could end up paying for all this yourself. so get allstate, and be better protected from mayhem, yeah, like me. thanks, bro. take a lap, rookie.

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coast to coast with stories that mattered most. you are watching local news. [applause] >> yeah. i wish you could hear the sound of the tape when i am walking

because people saying hey, chet, great work, all through the building. it is local news, each guest have to share a real news story wherever they are from and i vote the winner and that person gets to wrestle me and jello. >> i am not playing. [laughter] >> it is jello-pm. >> still not playing. jamie? >> what's your local news story? where are you from? oh, alaska. >> my news story is some interesting statistics from alaska. alaska was voted the third most beautiful state. the number one most patriotic state. >> most patriotic? >> and number one most dangerous state. >> because of bears? >> my theory is that to try to go see the beautiful stuff, you would die along the way. people are like oh, i want to see that in alaska before you die. oh, you can see it moments before you die if you want to.

[laughter] >> great, i think my answer will surprise you. what do you think is the most beautiful state? >> um -- alaska? >> okay. that was a terrible guess because it was three. it was supposed to be three and one. >> what are you doing? it is confusing me? >> it is california. >> what part? when you leave. >> you know, i am going to tell you right now -- not often we do this in local news but i am not going to factor in your story in the boating. that's not a story-reading fact. you totally violated the spirit and the soul of this segment. >> in my defense, i changed it when i heard what the prize was. [laughter]

>> well, down to you two. good luck! [laughter] >> your first time doing local news. >> yeah, i was the local news. >> oh, wow. i walked across the freeway in montana yesterday and i thought i saw bigfoot. i rolled the video. no, i was speaking in high school, i was at mountain hill middle school and two other schools, i was talking about bullying and i met with parents and kids, so it is pretty cool. i made the actual local news. >> that's cool, man. [applause] >> did the kids and parents know who you were while you were there? >> no, it is a big black guy with a shiny belt and they wanted to touch me. yes, they knew who i was. what the hell? ladies and gentlemen -- >> oh, i am curious how they would like - >> they reached out through a

foundation and i get calls all the time from schools to come speak. i usually can't do it because of timing or whatever. this one caught me because i had a little headache the other day and i was like sure, whatever -- i don't want to be on the phone. it happened and it was cool. it was interesting and mean girls are still mean girls. i have daughters now so i was not afraid. >> >> i am not allowed to go to high schools or schools in general. >> actually, everyone said for me to say hi to kat. >> oh. yeah. [applause] >> that was directed at me, in case you didn't notice. >> now, i am disqualified. >> liz, where are you from? >> long island. >> oh, wow. >> i am going for the jello wrestle with chet. i am going for the gold! i love it. >> let's go get a cinnabon with

"the view." >> what is your story? >> so, the central park owl who was cut out of the central park zoo, this owl, people are freaking out about this because they think he's going to die in the wild. he's hooting. his whereabouts in the northern part of central park. so, he's on a limb, i don't know if alvin bragg is trying to arrest him. >> oh my god. >> i don't know what you are getting -- >> it is impossible for them to mate, liz. i mean -- i would have to see the limb on the owl going at it. the owl on the limb, he can't put it anywhere. >> well, you know, chet, i appreciate the update there. it is really important. thank you for that clarification. you know he's still going after rats, this owl.

thank you doing your part for new york city. >> there you go. [applause] >> yeah! >> all right, kat, your batting cleanup. >> that's a baseball term. >> i have a sports one. >> michigan state university is in the sweet 16 for march madness. thank you. they're playing tomorrow and my family is a big msu fan, my mom wednesday there. guess what tomorrow is? my dead mom's birthday. >> yeah, way to bring us down. >> at least you can't make that one perverted. >> no! >> she will haunt your ass. >> well, you just gave him his plot twist. >> i see dead -- >> you are going to regret it around 3:00 a.m.

>> no one have done a porn version of "the six sense," i screw dead people. that's a plot twist. it is not real. >> what's that joke between cheney and liebermann? >> what? >> it is like i do see dead people. we got to get out of this. >> come on. >> i am going to just say no one. >> not funny. >> except for me, because then i will get all the jello for myself. jello-pm. >> you are making me laugh. >> the idea of jello that puts you to sleep. >> up next, the debate over a vegan license plate. [applause] mara, are you sure you don't want -to go bowling with us tonight? -yeah. no. >> you did that yesterday, too. [laughter] laughs ] oh, my daughter gives the best hugs! we're just passing through on our way to the jazz jamboree.

[ imitates trumpet playing ] and we wanted to thank america's number-one motorcycle insurer -for saving us money. -thank you. [ laughs ] mara, your parents are -- exactly like me? i know, right? well, cherish your friends and loved ones. let's roll, daddio! let's boogie-woogie! (psst psst) ahhhh... with flonase, allergies don't have to be scary spraying flonase daily gives you long-lasting, non-drowsy relief. (psst psst) flonase. all good.

a story in five words. >> main recall loves tofu and license plate. state recalled it and said it was inappropriate. >> yeah, all day i was like -- i thought it meant something else. >> is that wrong? >> is that on you if it says

tofu, it is your dirty mind? >> no, because i always said luvto-fu. >> you never had tofu in your life? >> no, i do love -- not to you. [laughter] >> yes, got it. >> back to you, jamie. >> yeah, i was disgusted when i found out what this meant, tofu. why would you want a license plate that says tofu, could you just drive a prius? [laughter] >> i get this. youyou know i love this. my i love -- >> you know how i love -- cable.

>> yeah, yeah, i get it. liz? >> um -- you're holding it together, are you? >> that's right. >> we are going to miss you. >> what are your thoughts on this? do you love tofu? >> i didn't know it was tofu. that's just a revelation. i am with tyrus all day long. leave it alone, who's cares? what's with this meddling people? >> when i was a child, i wanted novelty license plate. didn't you think it is the coolest thing? >> why did you let that dream die? >> i let a lot of dreams die - along with some people. we'll be right back. >> go ahead. >> this is the government. they do this all the time. there is people whose jobs it is to go through all the license

plates be like -- is this perverted or not? that's what they do at work all day. how do they pick these people? because you have to make sure you are perverted enough. >> right, so you know these people. >> it is a department full of taxpayers-funded perverts. >> who really like to -- >> yeah. if they are making mistakes like this, the person says i love tofu. imagine the other kinds of hazard decisions they have been making, you know? >> they probably got more interesting stuff going on there than missing forks. >> yeah, that's true. >> we can't allow this license plate because it can't be true. [laughter] >> that's right. >> all right, we got to go. don't go away, we'll be right back. chase freedom unlimited. so, if you're off the racking... ...or crab cracking, you're cashbacking. cashback on flapjacks, baby backs, or tacos at the taco shack. nah, i'm working on my six pack.

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>> liz mcdonald, thank you. a jamie thank you. >> from our studio not against fox news @ night i love you america. >> good evening and welcome to america's late news. fox news @ night. i'm trace gallagher in los angeles. >> breaking tonight more than 1 hours after a shooting in a denver high school, there is no official update yet on the teenage suspect who has been on the run. police say they found his vehicle at local media report a body was found nearby. jonathan anna has more information on what we are learning about. the shooting in the suspect is. >> a good evening. yes. intense and i