justice sotomaier. we're not accusing anything we're saying you know what this is all about, the left hopes it is it's their way to move the supreme court to the left because they have to take down every institution left in america. that's it for us tonight don't forget set your dvr so you always say connected to us. thank you for watching. gutfeld is next. ♪ >> greg: yes! here we go. here we go. ha ha ha ha, yeah! oh, wow. knock it out [cheers and applause] >> greg: happy wednesday, america. now when you think of san francisco, what did you used to think of? cable cars, rice a rony.

alcatraz, carl maldin's nose? you remember him, huh? ♪ >> greg: oh, man streets of san francisco, now they call it frisco because shoplifters stole the other letters. you may have heard nordstrom closing both downtown stores due to the shockingly amount of shoplifting. when asked about folding the white house said they thought they already blew that up. >> shut down is the pipeline of nordstrom one. >> greg: yeah, we dug up. but that can happen to anyone who among us hasn't confused a pipeline to a department store? i'm sure i've had gas in both. yeah, yeah.

it's okay to laugh. but another major retailer hauls as because of crime or as nordstrom put it, quote, the dynamics of the uni don't ton san francisco market changed drastically with the foot traffic to our stores and our ability to operate successfully. nothing impacts foot traffic like those feet hopping over needles and piles of poop or getting run over by violent looting nut jobs so let me translate what that statement really means to you. thanks to liberal policies built out of coward des by spineless politicians that refuse to judge or prosecute street excuse me once again everyone that was good has been ruined. may you all die in the next big earthquake. i addeded that last part for drake particular effect. that's why i don't work in pr. puerto rico. yeah. but you can't sell stuff if shoplifters already stole it and

crime makes customers stay away so it makes it tough to run a business. not just nordstrom 20 schools have closed since downtown sf, whole foods created barrel, marshals, sax, banana republic, even the gap. thankfully baby gap stayed open. their onesie fit me perfectly. seth is boarding up so many windows they better hope home depot doesn't close or they're really screwed. then they'll have to borrow paul pelosi's hammer. [cheers and applause]. >> greg: yeah, he's a victim of crime. he's a victim of crime. all due to the incompetence and negligence of local leaders. you can't blame the pandemic because the positives policies were there first and there's no besides the sur ridges, whole foods opened nearly a year ago

and since then 560 calls to police. almost as many crimes as turds on the sidewalk. i know because i sent jesse's assistant to count them. he didn't mind. a 911 call states man with machete is back. the caller was immediately arrested for assuming the attacker's gender. but the key word there is, is back. so this wasn't the first time there with a ma sheety or to call price. other say how they reradio threw food overdosed on drugs and threw crap on the floor. sounds like fondue night at kudlow's house. why not call the cops? you can try but they might not be there to pick up the phone. the sf police department has lost more than 330 officers during 2017. i guess you don't have to defund them if they all quit. why do people think it's okay to walk out of a store with arms

full of measure much? the city stopped enforcing the haul a decade along a bat on any theft of less than 950 bucks from a felony to misdemeanor. and you're playing the price is right and if you loot if it adds up to something less than a gram. and security guards there are now told not to stop shoplifters. so what are they securing exactly? a low paying job where they get to watch step mom porn on their phones? that sounds pretty good. and the one thing all these cities have in common, they're lon by the left, ak. a, america hating scum. to progressives progress crime is race it, a smash and scrub is a law abiding distribution, and who cares who you're radioing

from, that's your black privilege. you can't pick a night of chaos and expect order. we tried to point this out and they just laughed and now the democrats are paying for it in their own cities. of course they'll blame the city and not themselves. mean while frisco has spent over four hundred million bucks on a net to keep people from committing sue side off the golden great bridge. if only there were a ned for the city itself ♪ >> serious ending. >>. >> greg: let's welcome tonight's guest. she made a pasta look like a chump when she defended president trump. author of the new book serenity in the storm, kayleigh mcenany [cheers and applause] >> he loves the audience gasping for air because he likes to choke people. >> host of the harland podcast,

harlan williams. in high school she evwas voted most likely to slip through a storm drain. fox news contributor kat timpf. and he files his name with a belt sander. my massive side kick and the nwa heavy weight world champion, tyrus. so harland, how's life. >> pretty good. it's my favorite serial. let me ask you, how's count chock la? i never wake him up when i go to work. i don't know. >> holy frank berry. >> greg: so you're actually pro shoplifting aren't you? because you steal a lot of women's hearts. >> harland: exactly. >> greg: at the hospital. >> harland: yeah. you know what they should do, though. >> greg: what? >> harland: if they were smart the $0.99 store corporation

should move into frisco and just open stores for all these places you live. nobody's stealing from those places, they probably have people bringing crap into that store. >> that is so true. it's kind of a great message if you don't like your neighbors or a store like a radio shack or you don't like the dairy queen down the street and all thee vagrants are robbing, go to your house and thrown donuts and crack on you're welcome map and they'll be gone. >> greg: you hiv in southern california. >> yeah, yeah, right in hollywood, man. >> greg: have you ever been a victim of a crime? >> yes, yes, i have. i had my car stolen, it's a prius and it took about eight months to get it stolen but they finally did. >> greg: harlan

>> harland: too soon. >> greg: too soon. [laughter] rip. >> greg: never forget. >> harland: what? all right, kayleigh are we going to see this in other cities all these businesses fleeing. it feels like it's just, it's over, san francisco you remember i'm sure you covered it because you cover all the hard hitting here at gutfeld. 20 21 80 people ran into a walgreens outside of san francisco. >> it happened at the louie vuitton and walgreens. it happened in an outgrowth who, in a city 86% democrat voted him out of office almost 60-40 and recall elections have a .0-3

defense. is this sufic waking up, i'm not positivelyian a i tend to be naive, i don no if silicon valley bank's changing but i hope so, this city, who's going to be left of it kayleigh using strong language like gosh. >> tyrus: thank you for saying something. >> greg: this is a family show not the as you remember you do you. >> won grate layingsess on new book. >> thank you, thank you. >> greg: serenity in the storm. >> i needed it with jibbing acosta, he was the storm. >> greg: that sounds like the beginning of a romantic comedy. all right, i'll stop now, so, kat, could these cities make a comeback? let me ask you this, detroit, did detroit ever really come back or is it stuck in a spot and that's what's going to happen here they're all going down and they all end up like

detroit where there's nothing there except maybe a few hit bars. >> the downtown is amazing, so much fun you can go down to downtown detroit you just don't go to the abandon houses areas. >> where am i da for example to get my drugs. >> if that's what you're looking for do go there. that's what's amazing in a bad way this is downtown stuff. i know detroit is bad but people that go there, you can have a nice time can have great food go to a baseball game, stays so light out in the summer, i would love to summer in detroit but san francisco another thing we're maybe missing is also the pandemic, right? for a very long time, one of the only markets that was open was the black market. so it's no wonder >> greg: you don't need to introduce race here. >> harland: that's flourishing. san francisco lost more residents in the first year of the pandemic than any other city

so they made legitimate businesses illegal for a period of time and then all this other stuff going on when they were struggling to begin with. anyway detroit say nice things about detroit. that's what my mom always said to me and she's dead so don't disrespect her. >> greg: you're right because market street where the westfield mall where nordstrom's is is the main drag of san francisco and it's a mess. tyrus what did you get from this story, the monologue. >> tyrus: i'll still stuck on your very specific porn request of step moms. >> it's the number one porn on porn hub >> tyrus: you have a ratings thing that pops up where the numbers are out? oh, man, stepsisters is in trouble. >> greg: you know who told me about this. >> tyrus: kilmeade. >> greg: yes, brian kilmeade. >> tyrus: little backpack. >> greg: it's not just full of paper.

listen. >> greg: yeah, ilisten ever since we lost afghanistan we've just been going through a replacement and san francisco's going to be our new afghanistan. it will be fine. a place you can show the happens when you give up, or do i need to drop you off here and you can live out here and figure it out or go back and get your schoolwork done? great place to show pitchers? your parents didn't do that, they didn't take you to an abandoned house and say good hook. that's what san francisco's going to be the. >> greg: like a haunted house year round. >> tyrus: amnesty city that everyone got [bleep] out of, and it's literally just a place where zombies walk and people use the restroom. good news is they didn't go all in on that new toilet so we can put that somewhere else. but this is a nice amnesty city so maybe we can send more people that way and leave them over

there because it's gone. >> greg: you reme mind when you used to go to the scottie fair and they would have the side show, the druggedout guy. and it was like this is what happens when you do drugs. people can go to sf and say that. >> tyrus: i would flow there and lean your kid out the window. you want to go there? you want to go there? that's not an orange tree that's a crack tree and that person's getting robbed you want to go? something positive out of it. >> greg: up next should we testing politicians brains.

♪ >> greg: little too late. america may sleep better at night if the president proved his brain's all right. so nikki haley wants to be extra

cautious and make sure there's no sa nility in the oval office. yeah, nikki haley doubled down this week on mandatory competency tests on politicians older than 75. which is pretty brave for someone who's past her prime. >> don lemon would say! >> greg: don lemon. but she points to old joe who will be 82 on inauguration day if reelected but still sharp as a tack at least according to his 'em balmer. and his doctors gave him the all clear but that might have been for the defibrillator. i had to say that eight times in my head first. nicky calls out senator dianne feinstein who at 89 is a prime example of why we need mental competency tests. maybe she should take one assuming the smelling salt kicks in. but brain dead candidates are very close with dead voters and

that hasn't worked sinr since i had a mullet. she wasn't sharp in the 60s when she hired a chinese spy no be her driver. isn't this about transparency and whether republicans and democrats they send to dc are at the top of their game? >> this is about transparency, this is about the fact that republicans and democrats deserve to know whether the people they send to dc are at the top of their game. these competency tests are very simple, just about naming things that start with the same letter. it's about what month and what day it is. >> greg: quick kat what month and day is it? >> today's wednesday and it's may 3rd. >> greg: not bad. [cheers and applause] >> kat: i've been in like four time zones in the past five days. that was pretty good. >> greg: very good. all right. but such tests don't thrill joe biden's nurse doctor jill. by the way jill's a doctor the way way elvis was a black belt

in karate. glad we found the picture. a few weeks ago she body slammed nicky's proposal. and she she didn't call her a breakfast taco. but i wonder would her husband ever take one of those? >> i mean we would he ever in even discuss something like that. >> greg: of course she would never discuss it with him. he hasn't the slightest idea who she is. it would be like talking to a potato. a dr. potato. so what say you, joe? >> hey, hey, no, no, look. look, that lady jill doesn't know what she's talking about. all right? we never discussed that. just ask my wife, nikki haley, what she said. i don't need one of those but i'm take the same one that the other guy took. i don't care. remember that one, the person, woman, man, cam remarks tv,

repeat that back. person, radio, record player, phone graph. my wife's a doctor, you know the thing. done. look. put that in your pipe and stuff it down and meet me behind the five and dime, jack. [cheers and applause] >> greg: kayleigh wouldn't it be great if publicly, because we know it's going to be trump versus joe, to do ken situate tests on tv. >> kayleigh: that would be fun. i heard trump talk so many times about taking one of these steps, he's clearly confident beyond bounds and knew what he was doing with it in command unlike joe biden. i never thought i would have bernie sanders on my bingo card today. he talked about letting the american people make that

reputation. and it's kind of right because it doesn't take a rocket sigh activities to look at joe biden and say he's not competent, he shakes hair with air. he takes on a guy like corn pop after he was a truck driver and after he was arrested in the civil rights unit. how do you enforce it. they can voluntarily take the test and fail if they step assign. i don't think so. >> greg: yeah, harlan would you pass a competency test? >> harland: i wouldn't, no. no, no. i didn't even pass my pass of smear so -- >> greg: there's tampon's in the main bath rook. >> there is? that's what thought, this guy forget a competency test, competency is a big word. you know on every kid's coloring book there's take one page where you connect did dots and it

makes like a harvey norm wall. i would like to see him connect the dots. you could give him a rubik's cube that's one color and he won't be able to solve that. i want to take that guy to cracker barrel and have him do the triangle peg thinking. and if he wins he can be the president of omelets how about that. >> it peels one rubik's cube color off still trying to cheat. mr. president, it's the same color. >> this is a guy that thinks seven and eight years olds should be called 18. too soon? >> greg: no, he actually liked 7-11s because there were indian yeah, remember? why were all the indian people working at 7-11? want that him? >> tyrus: yeah, it also was him

if you don't vote for me we're all black. he's had a fun stellar 80th week this week. i think it's funny his wife is so defensive over it because then we find out she's pulling the strings. i think it should be case by case because just like -- we don't have to be ageless, greg. let's take the 80s south who know a couple people in their 20s, one's real smart the other not so much and if you p put that in any jon we'll ruin it. the same thing with 80 year olds, got his stuff together they can could great things. joe biden does not but he doesn't have to. he's our president, too, and if he wants to live in make believe man it's his right. it's america. so if he wants to battle corn pop for his eight moms of different background, good for him. live in fanned situate world so

you don't have to live in bleep bleep. >> greg: that's true, kat. would you support this test for people younger than 75? >> kat: no, i feel like we already know like everyone said he's not competent. i would never agree to take this test. he said how many 30 year old could go to positively anded dry on the strive, for 30 hours, get back on the train and meet with governor. >> he gets there and is like where do i go to buy my ticket. >> greg: true >> kat: being the president is obviously very, very hard but also the easiest difficulty setting in order to do daily life tasks which is where i model. you have other people do thatter no you, my cat could do that. he has a heart problem he can't fly but he couldn't. >> he doesn't have to look at a train schedule. >> yeah, should i use my points

on this? or should i -- where do he go to get the tickets, he wakes up every morning, has no idea what he's doing that day he has to wait for people to tell him. >> greg: that is a great life just like being a drawing. >> tyrus: not to mention everyone he signed up with was old, like a combined age of 900. nobody. no, we get to dry on this draw. look. >> greg: all right we have to move on. a drag diva endorses joining the armed forces. bosch bosch it grows grass 2 times faster than just seed alone. giving you a stronger lawn. smell that freedom, eh? get scotts turf builder rapid grass today, it's guaranteed. feed your lawn. feed it. ♪ limu emu & doug ♪ hey, man. nice pace! clearly, you're a safe driver. you could save hundreds for safe driving with liberty mutual. they customize your car insurance

so you only pay for what you need! [sfx: limu squawks] whoo! we gotta go again. only pay for what you need. ♪ liberty. liberty. liberty. liberty. ♪ >> woman: why did we choose safelite? we're always working on a project. while loading up our suv, one extra push and... crack! so, we scheduled at safelite.com. we were able to track our technician and knew exactly when he'd arrive. we can keep working! ♪ synth music ♪ >> woman: safelite came to us. >> tech: hi, i'm kendrick. >> woman: replaced our windshield, and installed new wipers to protect our new glass. that's service on our time. >> singers: ♪ safelite repair, safelite replace. ♪ has this happened to you? at&t and verizon rope you in with phone offers, then bind you to a 3-year device contract. break free with t-mobile! introducing go5g plus, the first plan that always gives new and existing customers the same great device deals,

and you're upgrade ready a year earlier. right now, bring your phone to t-mobile and get one of the latest 5g smart phones free! hello? yes, i'm free. and so are you... no, i'm not tied up at all. surely this is too many rope jokes. break free with go5g plus at t-mobile.

bath fitter is a better way to remodel your tub. a custom-made watertight fit and high-quality materials mean a beautiful tub, and a great value. bath fitter. it just fits. visit bathfitter.com to book your free consultation. my a1c was up here; now, it's down with rybelsus®. his a1c? it's down with rybelsus®. my doctor told me rybelsus® lowered a1c better than a leading branded pill and that people taking rybelsus® lost more weight. i got to my a1c goal and lost some weight too. rybelsus® isn't for people with type 1 diabetes. don't take rybelsus® if you or your family ever had medullary thyroid cancer,

or have multiple endocrine neoplasia syndrome type 2, or if allergic to it. stop rybelsus® and get medical help right away if you get a lump or swelling in your neck, severe stomach pain, or an allergic reaction. serious side effects may include pancreatitis. gallbladder problems may occur. tell your provider about vision problems or changes. taking rybelsus® with a sulfonylurea or insulin increases low blood sugar risk. side effects like nausea, vomiting, and diarrhea may lead to dehydration, which may worsen kidney problems. need to get your a1c down? you may pay as little as $10 per prescription. ♪ >> greg: will a salor in high heels bring in more navy seals. he's a recruiter for the navy, but dude looks like a lady >> united states navy desperate to increase its fighting force invited an active duty drag queen to boost recruitment. and boy does this compliment the women and children first procedure for the life boats.

doesn't look that bad. brings new meaning to the word navy cross. [laughter] >> greg: all right. but i guess recruitment sucks so they hired a spokesman who tucks. oh, so that's funny. 'cause nothing strikes fear in the hearts of our enemies like a geek who could use a feather boa and combat. none by regard salor like we need to know that. drawl kelly under the name harmy daniels and was one the digital ambassador. i guess stormy daniels would be bad luck for men at sea. although she could yell t, ar she blows. you people are so predictable. apparently the initiative was, quote, to read a wide range and convert old life invests into

pushup brahs. the navy is the second active duty military portion but may fall short on recruitment by nearly 8,000 people and all branches struggling to find americans who pass basic fitness assisted. such as limp singing. so if you're getting bud light dylan mulvaney back nash you're not alone. kid rock just shot up an aircraft carrier. well, i blame these guys. ♪ in the navy ♪ you can put your mind at ease ♪ in the navy, in the navy. >> greg: enlistment's up 80% amongst bikers and construction workers. and phoney indians. kat, you know, i know this sounds bad, i guess dand

inappropriate if a way but he's in the military. i think what bothers me is i don't give a [bleep] if you're non-binary. why is it we need to go keep it to yourself. kat? >> lady back there agrees with you. yeah, how do i -- i can't get worked up and say this is horrible. that drag queen looks fun. now am i who the navy should want to be going after for recruitment. >> right. >> greg: so you wouldn't make -- >> i wouldn't make a good person. this person wasn't getting paid they're just doing it. if i want to do drag and be like the navy's great i don't see how that's bad. sent all hate mail to me. >> greg: it reaction of

desperation. >> tyrus: no it reaction of hey i have an idea, and everyone in the woke world says sure, it's doing wonderful for bud light. anyone who wants to support the military i have no issue with this. but the problem is, you're doing it to -- you won't attract a certain type of person who would get their attention not getting the attention the other ways from recruitment and high schools and getting people pregnant when you're young. but they're not letting know, she doesn't get to dress like this when you're in afghanistan. >> greg: no. >> there's one outfit it's camouflage so highlights and makeup are really bad in the war zone. and somebody else who dress up and entertain, they want to stand out and want attention, list tale the last thing you want to do over-season the army or serve your country and be snowed and give attention from

people who want to hurt: so it's a misguided who is going to enjoy seeinging that? >> oh, misguided. >> greg: i literally lived with a gay man who was miss guided. >> that could be the name of the drag calendar, misguided missiles. misguided missiles, that's really good. yeah, uh-huh because he still has the junk right? harlan you dressed in in sorority boys. was that to recruit boys. >> no, that was to get my gun permit. but here's the thing, i did another movie called down per periscope and if you look at the credits they reshot the in the may have why i in san francisco. so i've been in that scenario on a submarine with those guys.

so, yeah, if i walk like a crab going out of here you know why. here's the thing kayleigh. here's the thing. >> kayleigh: that went over my head. just saying. >> harland: i'll take you to dipper at red lobster, we'll work it out. [laughter] >> harland: here's the bottom line to me. war is the end result of the military, okay? and i think maybe people until the united states are not so much the rest of the world where it's completely volatile, i've sort of lost tissue of the moror of mall. i didn't take pictures or video from wound, wood, vietnam, mangled bod yes, sir the death camps in germ any. so roar isn't for degreesing up

or a sloan show. this is all fine and dandy but people are going out and losing their lives. it's like the scenario where have you been hiking in the forest or canoeing and you're like, this is great but then, camping, how vulnerable we all are. you rallies how dangerous the world is. china and north korea are not doing mr. dress-up time. you have to take this one thing very seriously because it's the final line of defense and, you know, i don't think dressing up and putting on makeup is the right forum or arena for this type of speakical kayleigh what he said is this is basically -- like have we reached peak, peak drag queen, that it's now in our military and why can't we just say maybe hold off on this. >> kayleigh: yeah. okay russia's redrawing then ma, iran as 12 days away from a

nuclear weapon, they have enough material for that, the air force secretary says he's never been so troubled at looking at china building up its nuclear arsenal and what are we doing drag shows on bases and trans digital actors. you know who's laughing, kim is landing kim jung unis laughing. mark king said i'd take a look at them. your jokes may have gone over my head but i have to chairman of the group chief. >> harland: red lobster biscuits. >> kayleigh: oh, yeah. >> up next they uncovered the r. scoop from the front stoop. and here.

not so much here. if you've been diagnosed with chronic kidney disease farxiga reduces the risk of kidney failure which can lead to dialysis. farxiga can cause serious side effects including dehydration, urinary tract or genital yeast infections in women and men, and low blood sugar. ketoacidosis is a serious side effect that may lead to death. a rare life-threatening bacterial infection in the skin of the perineum could occur. stop taking farxiga and call your doctor right away if you have symptoms of this bacterial infection, an allergic reaction, or ketoacidosis. and don't take it if you are on dialysis. put yourself in the driver's seat. make an appointment to ask your doctor for farxiga for chronic kidney disease. if you can't afford your medication, astrazeneca may be able to help. ♪far-xi-ga♪ (dog barking) we love our pets. but we don't always love their hair. which is why we made bounce pet hair and lint guard with three times the pet hair fighting ingredients. just one sheet helps remove pet hair from your clothes!

looking good starts in the dryer with bounce pet. i bought the team! kevin...? i bought the team! i put it on my chase freedom unlimited card. and i'm gonna cashback on a few other things too. starting with the sound system... curry from deep. [autotune] that's caaaaaaaaash. i prefer the old intro! this is much better! i don't think so! steph, one more thing... the team owner gets five minutes a game. cash bros? wooooo, i like it! i'll break it to klay. cashback like a pro with chase freedom unlimited. how do you cashback? chase, make more of what's yours.

so it's decided, we'll park even deeper into parking spaces so people think they're open. surprise. [ laughs ] [ horn honks, muffled talking ] -can't hear you, jerry. -sorry. uh, yeah, can we get a system where when someone's bike is in the shop, then we could borrow someone else's? -no! -no! or you can get a quote with america's number-one motorcycle insurer and maybe save some money while you're at it. all in favor of that. [ horn honking ] there's a lot of buttons and knobs in here.

(music throughout) get the royal treatment. join the millions playing royal match today. download now. ♪ >> coast to coast with stories that matter most. you're watching local news with

nine-time emmy award winner chet van jansen. and now, here's vet. >> greg: yes. it's local news where each guest has to share a story from wherever they're from, then i announce the winner and that person gets to bounce a quarter off my ass. let's go to you tyrus. you always do something sporty. what's your -- >> whatever i'm going. it's a tough weeks for boston fans, bruins had the best record ever and lost in the first round at home, and the celtics, harden beat them game one. so just a tough time. what's going on right now at fenway park instead of watching the red sox in the basement terrible getting beat by boston, some took the time to check on the bud light area because there was no line for the first time

at fenway park. so they started taking pictures of the sad lonely worker with a completely full line of bud light beer. it was the first time at fenway that he had something to watch besides the dismal red sox again. it's a dis nal time to be a boston fan but either worse toen a bud light fan. >> greg: what's your town. >> i live in who will weird. >> greg: you just came up with that, didn't you? >> here's thing, in hollywood at the los angeles zoo, the koala had a baby. and so la decided to call it koala day. so now we have a koala day. only in los angeles. you know that koalas potential drunks. so what happens is they eat eucalyptus leaves and the toxins

kind of like my dad and it's the only thing they eat the way panda only eat bamboo. so give it to hollywood to has a day that's the only to be a drunk. >> they're mean drunks. >> they have those hands, they'll cling to you like a dingle berry on an ass hair. >> tyrus: and don't forget ca wa a herpes and chlamydia. >> greg: it was chlamydia koala co-mid i can't. >> the only upside those little hands are the perfect hands for fondling. if you're a girl they have grab your hooters and they have the little nipple flipper right here. >> greg: i didn't know that >> kat: that never occurred to me. >> greg: all right. >> harland: do you want to go to the zoo after the show?

[chee [cheers and applause] >> six minute absence that's the ticket. >> greg: kaylee. >> kayleigh: this is an ex rated show and i fear my story will somehow be perverted. i was sitting here nine months pregnant and you offered to deliver moi baby if i went into labor. hillsboro county sheriff's office pulls up highway 60 where i grew up, a guy comes running up to him and says my wife is delivering her baby. he goes up, deliver the baby, it was his third baby as a sheriff. how beautiful. try and pervert that. >> they were always his kids! born in a koala sanctuary. >> greg: yes. all right, kat, michigan

>> kat: yes. there is a woman there and she has a dog and she was walking the dog and an emu started chasing her. now, we don't have any video or a photo, but i had already made up that my mind that i was going to do this one. but she said she was throwing logs and rocks after her and she didn't care. she made it to a road access point and stopped. just a hot tip because i'm sure this is a relatable problem p emus are scared of the road. >> if it ever happens to me i'll be glad i knew. >> what kind of animal? >> it's a birth bureau. me favor comic emu phillips. >> i love her from the particular on her head and the touch on his toe. >> greg: that's one of his

jokes. >> not mine must be his. >> greg: my favorite segment is again likes to sick and tell on an she doesn't sell. playing pickleba...!

when a truck hit my car, the insurance company wasn't fair. i didn't know what my case was worth. so i called the barnes firm. i was hit by a car and needed help. i called the barnes firm, that was the best call i could've made. i'm rich barnes. it's hard for people to know how much their accident case is worth. let our injury attorneys help you get the best result possible. ♪ the barnes firm injury attorneys ♪ ♪ call one eight hundred, eight million ♪ our customers don't do what they do for likes or followers.

their path isn't for the casually curious. and that's what makes it matter the most when they find it. the exact thing that can change the world. some say it's what they were born to do... it's what they live to do... trinet serves small and medium sized businesses... so they can do more of what matters. benefits. payroll. compliance. trinet. people matter. ♪ >> a story in five words ♪ >> greg: gwyneth plays f, marry, kill. >> we are going to do a little

one last game. >> okay. >> [bleep], marry, kill. brad pitt, ben affleck and chris martin. >> obviously i would marry chris martin because he gave me my two children. >> one more time i think we know your answer. >> i think brad. >> brad, yeah. >> and then ben, yeah. >> god bless ben. >> god bless him. >> all righty. so i like the fact that she didn't pronounce the t in chris martin's name. kat what do you make of this comparing your ex's publicly in a game of f, marry kill. >> i wonder when this was filmed because we probably had a similar experience in la sitting in the back of the car saying should i have taped that on a podcast that. that's how i felt after i taped bill maher. she watched that like oh my god my daughter's going to see that some day. i was like oh my god should i have said that when my dad's

still alive. i like gwennie paltrow now. she knows people are going to get mad but so much better than celebrities who pretend to eat junk food. i think she's being real, someone asked her about it and she probably freaked out the whole way home so gwyneth you are okay in my book. don't worry about it. >> greg: harlan have you ever played this game? >> harland: i have a sex game that i have sort of played with gwyneth and brad pitt? >> greg: really. >> harland: yes, check it out, i think you heard that gwyneth had a candle made that smells like her va jay ajayi. so i bought this thing lit it up and my whole place smells like a va jay ajayi. you can't get rid of that thing. i had though douche my curtains. you know how some houses get mold? my attic has a yeast infection. so i had to buy a brad pitt

penis candle just to even out the air in my home. i hand it off to you. >> kat: i hand it off to you. >> kayleigh: gwyneth said i can't believe my daughter's listening to this show, i'm going to make that my tag line for this. >> greg: don't let kids stay up late tonight. >> kayleigh: she's going to bet. >> greg: tyrus? >> tyrus: we have too many podcasts in the world. there needs to be government regulation immediately. we need to cut it down to four. we get four podcasts, that's it. because what was that? what did we just watch somebody trying to be cool laughing at their own dumb joke. nobody plays that game anymore especially when people you have to see potentially in court. so againie you got away with one, just go away. >> you know what would be great if he had one curveball, like

brat pitt ben affleck and charles man son. >> harland: that would be great that's easy, you mary charles man son. >> greg: he was a great kisser. don't go away we'll be right back. my kids are sports kids. we're always running from one activity to another. i'm still tonya, and i got botox® cosmetic, and this is like the first thing i've done for me in a really, really long time. my life is still crazy, it's just as full as it was before. just with less lines. botox® cosmetic is fda approved to temporarily make frown lines, crow's feet, and forehead lines look better. the effects of botox® cosmetic may spread hours to weeks after injection causing serious symptoms. alert your doctor right away, as difficulty swallowing, speaking, breathing, eye problems, or muscle weakness may be a sign of a life-threatening condition. do not receive botox® cosmetic if you have a skin infection. side effects may include allergic reactions, injection site pain, headache, eyebrow, eyelid drooping, and eyelid swelling. tell your doctor about your medical history.

muscle or nerve conditions, and medications including botulinum toxins. as these may increase the risk of serious side effects. see for yourself at botoxcosmetic.com they need their lawn back fast and you need scotts turf builder rapid grass. it grows grass 2 times faster than just seed alone. giving you a stronger lawn. smell that freedom, eh? get scotts turf builder rapid grass today, it's guaranteed. feed your lawn. feed it.

(music throughout) get the royal treatment. join the millions playing royal match today. download now.

>> thanks to harlen williams kaley mcenaney and you all of america. >> good evening, welcome to "fox news at night," i'm mike emmanuel in washington in for trace gallagher. breaking tonight's the manhunt in atlanta for a suspected gunman is over, one person is dead four wounded after shots fired at a hospital in a busy midtown neighborhood, thousands evacuated the area, nearby residents locked down. >> i just heard gunshots. >> at first i didn't know exactly what that was. i've never been in a situation like this before. >> it's like you hear about this