though, company disabled the comments section on its social media. now, would they be worried about a public outcry? come on, small victories but victories nonetheless. thank you for watching. remember, it is america now and forever. we'll see you on instagram and twitter. greg gutfeld takes it all from here. **♪ ♪ [cheers and applause] >> greg: happy, happy thursday, everyone. it's official. this is now the best late night show in america. [cheers and applause]

>> greg: because it's the only late night show in america. i'll take it. i don't care. so today senior intel officials testified on capitol hill on worldwide threats. among the topics, china, russia, iran, artificial intelligence, and also geraldo removing his shirt in front of children. a.i. is now in the same discussion as some of our biggest, most dangerous adversaries, so you think we would put someone serious in charge of it, right? someone with gravitas and a piercing bo electricity, someone who could ensure everything is under control. so who would we pick? >> what do you want to know? >> greg: it makes sense. every time i hear the words artificial intelligence, i think of her. but it's true, kamala has been tapped as the administration's point person on a.i. apparently to see if artificial intelligence is no match for her natural stupidity.

by the way, how is she going to help by sleeping with r-2-d-2? >> terrible. >> greg: maybe it's a genius move to have our most innanhuman face off. it would make a rhumba pull its own plug. today she met with ceo's from major companies developing a.i. including google, microsoft, and anthropic, which raises the question, who is that? hawaii-anthropic. >> that's funny. >> greg: it is funny so shut up. according to the white house it was meant to underscore this responsibility and emphasize the importance of driving responsible, trustworthy and ethical innovations that mitigate risks, potential harms to society. i would need an a.i. to

translate that into english. it's about short and long term dangers of this technology, meaning will they kill us tomorrow or in 10 years? in democrats and republicans agree it's good that we got around to talking about it but are we putting our best foot forward when we send this? >> i think it's very important for us at every moment in time and certainly this one, to see the moment in time in which we exist in our present, so during women's history month, we celebrate and we honor the women who made history throughout history. the passage of time, right, the significance of the passage of time so when you think about it there is great significance to the passage of time. it is time for us to do what we have been doing, and that time is every day. [laughter] >> greg: they call that a word salad because every time she

speaks i'm waiting for garlic croutons to fall out of her mouth? can you imagine how that a.i. meeting went, all those industry heads would bun plugging their laptops and using their cords to hang themselves. of course, putting cam on the a. i-team is about her gaining new visibility for the next election which is like squeezing your squeeze zee before driving off the cliff. she's sitting down with people who have developed complex a.i. technology. they know what powers the machine, and the only thing she's ever turned on is willie brown. >> greg: disgusting. look, none of these politicians know jack about technology. they embarrass themselves at those hearings about social media. but this is pure just giving up. you think that creature that says this even bothers to read up on anything? >> i think of this moment as a

moment that is about great momentum. inspired by, yes, optimism, inspired by a crisis no doubt. but inspired by also our collective ability to see what can be unburdened by what has been. >> greg: quick, someone get her a glass of thousand island. but her ramblings aren't a sign of stupidity. it's a sign of arrogance that she feels exempt from preparation or substance. she'll just wing it, on our biggest challenge. the problem is you have to have talent to wing it, or maybe bongos. >> on this, the intersection between climate, extreme climate, right, which is going to be, that's also going to be an intersection with human behaviors, about greenhouse gas emissions, what we need to do around carbon capture, the intersection of that and public

health. [drums] >> and then how we think about in terms of the intersex between that and education. [drums] [applause] >> greg: never gets old. the white house also said they are going to spends $140 million to create seven new a.i. research institutes. here's a suggestion. please don't put any in wuhan. and keep them away from this jack ass. and the white house budget office, which is as useful as a tourism board in syria is expected to issue guidance on how federal agencies can use a.i. tools, meaning they will be taught to audit taxpayers and perform abortions which brings us back to those other worldwide threats. i mean what do you think the other world powers are going to do with a.i.? you know if china is working on a military angle, here's what

they are planning. ♪ loud sounds] >> greg: so what will america get with kamala in charge? [laughter] [applause] >> greg: so yes, if you weren't sure we were screwed before, oh, we're screwed. but there is one silver lining. maybe if a.i. gains the upper hand it can replace kamala and would we even know the difference? >> we have to have courage and if we don't have courage you're not going to have a country. now we have to win and we have to win bigger than ever before and we'll get it all straightened out. elton john said, encore is very dangerous. do you a fantastic concert, everyone is going crazy. then do you an encore of a song is, it's good, then do you another encore, and the song doesn't work and you leave,

everyone says what a rotten job. [laughter] >> greg: better than the real thing. let's welcome tonight's guests. he's not a new york cab driver anymore. he just smells like one. fox across america, jimmy fallon. born in oklahoma, he's still getting used to indoor plumbing. the terence k. williams show, terence k. williams. [applause] >> greg: she stands up for jews and gives anti-semites the blues. human rights author -- [inaudible] and her book guarantees what readers want most. a refund. >> greg: jimmy, i go to you

first because you look like a pervert florist. she's going to wing this, this is the worst thing you can wing. oh, a thousand percent. isn't it scary that we have computers that can talk like a human but a vice president who can't? but here's a fun fact about your buddy jimmy fallon. i met her husband in d.c. this weekend, i posted a picture online. very sweet man. way too much secret service. that's not my take. that's his take. he's like hello, i'm married to kamala, kidnap me, get me out of here. it was a bizarre experience. i actually met -- the poor waiter, he asked her what she wanted for dinner and she went through a binder for 10 minutes trying to find an answer but that one bombed but stick with me. >> i love it when you use the show to shop new material. >> i look like -- you look like you're going to the mets -- the mets gala, that's all i've got.

>> greg: there you go. you must have had a late night last night. >> you better believe it. >> greg: nice shirt. >> thank you. it's a shameless promotion of my new book. i'm going to pre-order it. don't joke about jews. you're not allowed. >> i might throw a pin at you. >> greg: she did that to me many years ago. do you think kamala was a great choice? >> this is such a serious issue, no matter how much we joke about it, and the best we have is elon musk putting out an open letter saying that we have to pause. but, if we pause, china is not pausing. iran is not pausing, so that's actually going to put us in an even worse position and look at how these countries are already using their a.i., right? iran is now using a.i. to identify women who don't have

their hijab's on. we have china with social scores, where they follow citizens, they see how they operate and they can either have their rights or they don't have their rights. it's so scary right now, and i honestly, i don't even know what to say. i'm so horrified and that's why i live with my children on a mountain in northern israel, with no internet and they live in cages. [laughter] >> they don't know what youtube is. >> greg: let's hope a.i. helps to end jew hatred. what do you make of this whole a.i. thing? >> lord, jesus, thank the wheel. kamala harris being in charge of artificial intelligence, that's like putting hunter in charge of a rehab facility. come on. i mean, that's like putting hillary clinton in charge of

jeffrey epstein. >> greg: i think they did. >> i just don't get it. kamala harris is the dumbest vice president we have ever had. just imagine, close your eyes and just imagine kamala harris pulling up to meeting, laughing and giggling, to sit down in front of some of the smartest scientists in the country, and then says, guys, we have to understand the significance of a.i., because when we understand the significance of a.i., we will begin to learn more about the significance of a.i. >> greg: i felt like she was right here. >> it was real. >> the dumbest person in charge. who else would they have put in charge? >> greg: he could use a.i., or

who was the dude who stole the luggage. >> but i think a robot can do a better job than kamala harris. like she said, kamala harris couldn't even go to the border, if we're going to put this laughing hyena in charge of artificial intelligence, we're in trouble. >> greg: welcome to the show. you look very serious, like cat from the future. >> the dress came with a security clearance. >> she looks like the waffle house press secretary. >> oh. >> that was a compliment. >> i'm really skinny. i don't know. whenever i hear the government talking about how they need to do something, for safety or security, like alarm bells go off in my head, are they going to use fear to try to, you know, get us to be okay with them doing something? i get that, some legislation is going to be necessary but i don't know when is the last time the government admitted --

limited its legislation to only what's necessary. it could be me being paranoid but i don't think so because i'm looking at every single other thing that's happened. >> greg: by logic, it's a good thing she's in charge. >> perhaps because she might do nothing. >> isn't it scary, though, that we have like this super intelligent artificial life that wants to wipe us out and we're being led by a man who doesn't know why his vcr is flashing 12:00. like that scares me, and the only thing i would add to what he says it's also mind blowing in this country the vice president is the only job you can get if you laugh for no reason during the interview. if you were hiring a dog walker, and you were just, i'm just going the take him to the park, [laughter] i'll keep gus with me for the day because i'm scared. >> greg: she reminds me of the eternal college student who likes to party and then sleeps in and says, you know what? i know i can take this test, and she got away with it but now,

this is like -- >> it's important thing. >> she sounds like a college student that's been smoking weed all day. >> she sounds like the college student that the ant from full house paid to get her into usa. [laughter] >> greg: before we go, tickets are available for my upcoming book tour. look at that lock how ripped i am. i bet you didn't know that i'll be in atlanta, clearwater, fort myers, providence, that's in rhode island, and my favorite, redding, pennsylvania, home of the peanut bar. anybody been to the peanut bar? you can eat peanuts in there and just leave it on the floor. you can get a customized mother's day card when you pre-order the book and go to gutfeld.com for details. adding stuff on twitter makes libs really bitter.

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>> greg: if you like the wrong tweet you might get your ass beat. case in point, what's being done to mark -- he's the one there on the left. the president of thomas jefferson university, in war-torn philadelphia. a city known for cheese steaks and getting shot while ordering cheese steaks. i thought we would get a better laugh. mildly chuckled at the shooting. child sex changes, and college diversity offices. so the philly "enquirer" became the inquisition, jenning up the scandal after anonymous university employees at that timeeled on the guy. i still remember when people like that were called snitches, and people like cat gave them stitches. yes. so the paper really did some

hard core investigative work and took a deep dive into all his past twitter likes. mind you they are doing this in philly, a city that recorded two years in a row with 500 homicides a piece. so as the bodies pile up this is the story they choose to pursue, tweets. they must really be okay with getting murdered. they support the phillies. [boos] >> greg: i don't know anything about baseball. one nameless view, some called into we the university's commitment to diversity and inclusion and transidentifying students, oh, man, and students of color. translation, he doesn't like it when we don't cut off kids wieners. it all goes back to wokeness, or as it's more commonly known, head up your ass syndrome. now the dude is defending himself from the mob saying he liked the tweets to bookmark them for later. the next thing you know he'll tell us he only reads play boys for the articles. it's about time universities

stop pretending to care about free speech. imagine if they decided to investigate my liked tweets what could they conclude? here's one. [laughter] >> greg: here's another. >> greg: and there is this one. [laughter] >> greg: i guess you could tell i'm really into fitness. you know, brook, these people that are narking work at the university, university employees and they are going after some guy for basically liking a tweet. what's going on -- is this a problem with all human beings now, that they are just a bun of [ bleep ] pardon my language. >> greg, we've been talking about this what i love about you so much is you're such a champion of free speech and you know, like, the only thing more

dangerous than hate speech is political correctness, because political correctness equals the death of free speech. and i wrote my first book about. this you had me on when i wrote it, at that time, people were coming after me, they were coming after people on fox news, who were talking about islamic terrorism, theologically motivated terrorism. they were calling us islam mo phobic, trying to shut us down and file lawsuits against us. fast forward, we're in the bizarre world where you can't even say a boy is a boy and a girl is a girl, and that's getting you canceled. that's the natural progression of what happens with political correctness, and it is the greatest danger. i want to say one more thing. he was trying to raise awareness also about the diversity and equity inclusion, which is happening on campuses across the united states, that are mostly funded by foreign countries like qatar and like saudi arabia. this is the greatest national security threat that's posed to

this country right now. >> greg: put that on the t-shirt. [applause] >> greg: what did you make of the employees' concerns over his tweets about who he was possibly harming? >> these are the same people who canceled a black woman for being on a surf bottle. he was for the kids getting sex changes that kind of triggered me. can i vent a little bit? >> greg: yes. >> they were mad he liked this stuff that was against transitioning. when i was growing up, and i didn't have anybody to advocate for me, i always felt like i was a tall black man, trapped in a small size body. always. and i wanted to get surgery, become taller, doctors wouldn't

even touch my knees. [laughter] >> all i ever wanted to be was taller because i felt like that inside. >> greg: yes. >> i couldn't get surgery on my knees but these kids -- but then, i would have been allowed to get my candy bar cut off. i don't get it. it's stupid. you know. >> greg: should he have had to explain himself? that's kind of sad. >> i think we just have so many conversations about people like him, and then not enough conversations about who are the people who are going through someone else's liked tweets from forever ago, sitting there, what is your life like, that in your spare time you're going to go to someone else's profile, click the like area and just scroll down and look at all of these things? i mean, just because you do that, you bring this person down, that doesn't not only make you a college president, right? it's pathetic. i think people like that haven't reached the level of success

that they wanted to in their life because there is no reason, i mean, i have never in my life gone through someone's likes except for that one time when i wanted to figure out when my ex started banging that other girl. >> greg: imagine trying to tell your parents what you do, and it's like you're basically a hall monitor, a social media hall monitor. >> this is a purge. they are intentionally going after people at institutions, you know, in levels of authority and positions, and taking them down because they are not buying this woke ideology. this gentleman was a mo electric -- is a molecular impeachment -- immunologist.

>> he's actually grinder. >> that's what i'm wearing right here. what's happening at universities is they are being plagued, it's like conformity cops where they are just missstal whipping people into complying with that conformist progressive mindset but the difference with conformity cops and real cops, as the song goes, bad themes what are you going to do instead of bad boys. but here's the problem. >> i did get it. >> here's the thing. [laughter] >> it took a minute, though. it took a minute. that was a time release joke. but here's the thing. the problem is what they are silencing oftentimes is accurate. one of the things he took heat from is liking tweets that said the vaccine didn't stop transmission and it didn't stop transmission but we spent more energy going after the guy who called that out than the people who sold us the [ bleep ] vaccine. they changed the sale. i went from you can't get vo

individual, you'll get covid but it will be better and everyone who got covid, oh, i got covid but thank god i got the vaccine, and i'm getting a booster, which is like saying, oh, my wife is pregnant but thank god we used a condom, you know what i mean. >> they want to say what's so important because there is really a very easy solution. everybody who is watching now, everybody in the audience go to his twitter, retweet it and say, i support you. you're speaking the truth. do not let him get canceled. use our free speech to support him. >> greg: aren't you a little renegade. >> you've been an activist since you were born. up next, how to go on the attack if they recline too far back? [cheers and applause] you're just gonna stand there? or are ya gonna take your lawn back. we're gonna take it back. we're gonna take it back. with scotts turf builder triple action! it gets three jobs done at once -

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your face should you blast cold air into his face? it's time for the eternal debate. the seat back hack. >> greg: wow, that was really expensive. i could have put that on a steak dinner and you guys wouldn't even have known. it's a question as old as the toilet paper stuck to whoopee goldberg's shoe. when flying should you -- one dope advises to just open the air vent above you full blast and point it at the top of the head of the person in front of you. or if you're flying spirit air you just crack open a window. now people who saw this online suggestion are divided. some call it completely reasonable, others argue that no one can dictate what you do with

the space that you paid for, which is why i always bring my toenail clipper. but like me in college, that reasoning can go both ways. if you can do the air conditioner valve, then i can do the recliner button. it's mutually assured destruction to ensure that nobody ever gets their way, the way it's supposed to be. the point is, if you're that bothered by what your fellow passengers are doing, then learn to travel like an adult and arrive at the gate blackout drunk. [laughter] >> greg: just be thankful you aren't taking a flight with this guy. cat, you take up virtually no face on an airline seat. would you even care if somebody reclines? where are you in this debate? >> i reclined my seat for the first time ever last week. >> greg: really? >> yes, because i thought i didn't know how. i was like, should i admit this or not? maybe this can help somebody else. i'm sure this is a very relatable problem.

>> greg: you're the first person -- >> i tried to do it once but couldn't figure out how to do it but then i realized it was one of those seats that didn't recline but i didn't want to try again because i didn't want anyone to never know this so i never tried again and last time i did it, i found it quite easy. >> greg: did you enjoy it? >> yes. >> greg: sometimes people don't like the first time. >> so maybe this guy, maybe this guy had the same problem. i'm sure it happens all the time. grow grew hit the nail on the head. >> he doesn't know how. >> greg: people who get upset about this tend to be inexperienced flyers, right? it's like, they are like i'm not used to this but terence, if you get into a car you can move the seat. you get on a train you can move the seat. you can move the seat anywhere. i'm moving the seat right now. shaking it at you. >> sharing like a dog. >> greg: where do you sit on this debate? >> well, first of all, this must be first class problems, because my seats never recline.

i'm way in the back, i'm basically sitting in the bathroom. i'm way in the back, or they had me sitting in the exit row and those seats do not recline but one thing i hate, i cannot stand, when they ask me, terence, sir, will you assist others in case of an emergency? please nod your head. you can't nod, say yes. first of all, hell no. do you think if i'm by the exit door, do you think i'm about to save 150 people? before -- and i'm right by the door. i'm the first one out that damn door. hello, goodbye, i'm gone. >> greg: that's true. at least you're honest. you're honest about it. i would definitely say yes and then do what you did. [laughter] >> greg: jimmy, i don't understand this why doesn't everybody just recline at the at the same time? this is the strangest debate. by the way, you guys might think this is an important debate, i know people who get really emotional about this.

anti- anti-recline. >> this is what i think it comes down to, because i'm a very consider yacht flyer. i think it's height related. when i get in the seat i'll look at the guy behind me. if he's as tall as tire russ -- i wouldn't want to encroach on his face. once i knew you were in your booster seat i would recline the share so i knew it wasn't going to hurt the seat but a peace offering here, because i love you, okay? i actually really appreciate it, as a guy who flies a lot, that you worked in a spirit airlines joke because people need to know how bad it is. i got on the spirit. it needs to be called out. >> greg: when was the last time you flew spirit? >> a guy walks out, excuse me, ladies and gentlemen, if i could just get a dollar for something to eat. and like, and like, yo, that was

the pilot, dude. i don't feel safe, i don't feel safe. >> greg: what about you, ms. -- >> goldstein. >> we've known each other way too long. well, i tell you my official legal opinion. okay? there are two places in the western world where you have no rights. there is no morality, okay? there is no rules. and that's customs and on the airplane. so i say do whatever you want to do. you do recall also i've been kicked off airplanes. yes, on my way to my own wedding. >> greg: that's right. >> i forgot about that. >> i broke the story on red eye, i believe. >> greg: it was on red eye. >> i was kicked off american airlines because my husband didn't turn his phone off when they told us to turn the phone off. and they kicked us off.

we were escorted off the plane under like police -- >> greg: did you tell them i'm going to my wedding? >> yes, i cried. i actually cried and they didn't care, they offered to book us on the next flight. they said we were a terrorist threat and they offered to book us on the next flight. so go figure. >> greg: you're a terrorist so we're going to endanger the next crew. the next passengers. they certainly didn't end your hatred. >> certainly not, they created it. >> greg: coming up, our guest smooze about hometown news.

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>> greg: i vote on the winner and the person gets this official fox news door stop. all right, jimmy. >> we use the water coasters, shout out to jesse. my local news story is a 100-year-old submarine, was found sunken off the coast of long island and this should be the biggest story in the world because it's a pretty famous submarine. when you google sinking ship every story is about the biden administration. red meat. there was a story called the lake that a guy built a hundred years ago because he wanted to sell it to the navy as a u.s. submarine but they didn't buy it so he repurposed it a second time as a mind sweeper and then he renamed the sub, but it sank and it gone so the guys who found it, they have been looking for it for like 50 years. >> i thought maybe it was a

japanese spy sub. >> it was called the defender. that was the thing. they wanted to believe it was lake a foreign sub. >> greg: getting even more boring. >> let's just stop this. i can't imagine another fact coming from you that's interesting. >> all right. >> okay. so i have, being that i live in israel now, two -- >> greg: what is that? new jersey. go ahead. >> okay. at least two american couples were caught by israeli customs smuggling more than 650 pounds of fruit roll-ups into israel because there is currently a shortage, and customs officials at ben-gurion international airport opened these suitcases and they said what are you doing? why did you fill two checked bags with fruit rollups and he said it has something to do with ice cream and tik tok.

end quote. so obviously he's referring to this tik tok trend where apparently all of these deals are wrapping ice cream in fruit roll-ups and then they and they get crunchy and they are just delicious. >> greg: wow! that's a great story. that's how it's done, jimmy. >> greg: i want to hear that story again and it's fruit roll-ups. >> there is a shortage of fruit roll-ups in israel. >> greg: that's what they say when you pull up to the store. here's a fruit rollup. i like that one. [applause] where are you from? give me a story. >> hollywood, they shot a squall to the movie twister. and i hope when all those hollywood liberals get there, that the tornado hits, a real one, lift them like dorothy and the wizard of oz back to hollywood.

the but also, this movie is about white people chasing tornados, stop chasing tornados. it's dangerous. and greg, i know you said you're going to pick a winner, you have to pick me because i'm black and if you don't, you're racist. i won. [laughter] i won. >> greg: all right. i've got to hear from the polish czech. all right, cat. >> i want to start mine with a zero context sound bite. here she comes. always talking about teeth. that's my passion, that's what i do. >> i think i win. >> greg: what's going on? >> the teeth lady. she goes around in a little teeth mobile and fixes people teeth in detroit. what a nice lady she is. you're going to let her loose? >> greg: she does this for free? >> i don't know. i didn't read that far into the article. >> greg: would you trust

somebody who pulls up in a van offering to fix your teeth? i guess in detroit that's considered an anomaly. >> i think the local news here is they found people in detroit with teeth. >> oh! >> greg: i love you. you know i love you. >> it's not an accurate representation of one of detroit's many, i'll give you, problems. there are plenty of teeth. >> greg: it's funny because detroit is amazing. they actually love this show, detroit. it's very popular, in detroit. >> it is very popular and i love my fans. i lover you, detroit. >> greg: all right. i think -- i've got to go with the fruit roll-ups. i'm sorry, i'm a racist. [applause] . >> you get a jesse waters group. up next, would you eat fish grown in a petri dish? ♪ ♪

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lab? >> i missed that part of the story. >> greg: about israel? >> now i have to support the franken fish. >> greg: you were against it and then you switched because you found out they were a different race. >> you don't boy got israeli products, do you? >> greg: no, i don't like the way you're looking at me. you know that's a thing i would never do. so -- grouper. which is a fish and they shove it into a 3-d printer and they come up with a final product. does that scare are you, terence? >> no. >> greg: would you eat it? >> i don't care where the fish come from. where i'm from we eat everything down south. do it taste good with hot sauce? >> greg: probably. >> excuse me, waiter, can i get that crispy lab -- that lab grown fish filet, please, with some mash potatoes on the side, some collard greens, honey corn

bread, and black eye peas and sweet tea. i don't care where it's from. if it tastes like fish, it's all right. >> greg: i hate the taste of fish. i hate it. that's why i don't understand, if you're going to make something in the lab. >> i they will you're lab fish. >> greg: i thought you said you will take a lap dance. >> and i was about to do it. >> greg: cat, why invent a new meat? >> every day when i wake up, that's what i think, why not invent a new meat. >> greg: a protein that's super sweet so you can eat candy all day and never gain weight. like, a 3-d meat that tastes just like candy. that way you don't get cavities or diabetes. >> that takes all the fun out of it. i have never had a cavity. >> greg: good for you. >> i don't think i would eat

this but that's just because i'm not that hungry. >> greg: good for you. all right. >> jimmy, try to end this show with a number of jokes that you won't get a courtesy laugh for, you'll get a real laugh. >> let's do it. can you imagine? >> first of all, i think this is disgusting but second of all it's annoying that you have to present it. kids, we can't have dinner because we're out of magenta ink. >> greg: and your printer will smell like fish. >> send the kid down to kink. >> sean: -- >> the left is obsessed with eliminating naturally occurring meat. that's the headline here is we're now growing nature lab. you think even domestically here in america the democrats are so obsessed with eliminating red meat they elected a vegetable in pennsylvania as a way to turn it

into a political thing. >> it was political from the start. >> greg: i'm impressed. we've got to got. don't go away, though, we'll be right back. >> woman: why did we choose safelite? we were loading our suv when... crack! safelite came right to us, and we could see exactly when they'd arrive with a replacement we could trust. that's service the way we want it. >> singers: ♪ safelite repair, safelite replace. ♪

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get a quote at progressivecommercial.com. we are out of time. thank you, brooke, jimmy, kat. fox news that night is next. drama. >> good evening, welcomed "fox news @ night" i'm in washington in. trace gallagher. breaking now, plus a murder are subway rider coming to defend new york writers against the me making threats, criminal charge could come against the 24 -year-old veteran accused of beating a homeless man to death we have that story and we have breaking details this evening. >> good evening, jillian gill i think that is clear is a 30 -year-old homeless man