please set thig. you dvr so you never, ever, ever, ever miss an episode. mondayer er mis, tuesday, wedne, thursday, friday. a vanity ever set for every da the week. and anyway, thank you for making this show possible. pok you for being with us. have a great weekend. stay tuned. std,not your heart be troubled . gutfeld is next to put a smile on your face. we'll see you backs next here on monday. >> have a great weekend. go to. let's welcome tonight's guest. he performt's hospital patientst to remind them that things could be worse. founde ouldr of the love this p, dr. michael loftus. when she wants your opinion.

she'll give itiv to fox news ban anchor julie bader. his writings than a macheteha made of cheese. novelist and literarn a chete mc walter kirn. and finally, she's like that pac pack of cigarettes forlt your health, but popular with bikers. fox news contributor, all right. >> before we get to some news stories, it's friday, so let's this. >> greg's leftover. >> mm. yeah, it's leftover is where i read the jokes we didn't use this week. and as always,d it's my first time reading these. so if they , i'll skin joe with a dull butter knife. >> yeah be hard to tell, though. here we go. barry's executive as jet ski

allegedl y that hunter biden pu dumber than his dog since his dog knows when to stopmp his leg. that's not bad. oh here's another joe and hunter allegedly coerced the burisma ceo to pay them 5 million bucks each. in return, joe gave themcal fe political favors and hunter gave them scabieveter gaves. >> joe biden started using a shorter set of stairs board air force one after he kept falling on the regular stair s. s. so what will cushion his fallwic nextus time? >> depends. came up too soon. you like you like him? yeah. >> they're a proud sponsor to the outnumbered. yeah. i don't know why i choose them . i'm kidding. harris, don't come after. the

a burger king manager in south carolina was arrested after servinbug a customer. french fries that were in a garbage can. in a gsuspicions about the friee first aroused when the customer noticed they werr e actually. >> true, huh? the wife of long island's gil go beat serial killer has filed for divorce. and that divorce is goingnd a l to cost him an arm and aeg leg.s i know that's tasteless. >> that's terrible, actually. john fetterman says his debate performance, quote, led the match on his depressiot matcn. >> and we all know how he feels about fire. abc announced 71-year-old jerry turner as the star of the golden bachelor. s needless to say, jerry will spend the next two weeks trying to figure out how ttryino the show on his dvr. that's our audience for

laughing at. >> they pay for these threads. joe jonas revealed this weekent that he once accidentally did onnumber to in his pants while on stage. in response, a relie stage.f, president biden said. >> you too jokes and you ask me. , >> people ask me, greg, dope m people really love jokes? jokes? >> there's your answer. political experts saye of the democrats have a shortage of male voters, but they hop voe to it up with an influx of women with . >> that's funny because it's true. arbie >> barbie opens in theaters today. although. becausops in theate has no malea keep confusing him with princeur harry.y. tasteless. the stifle ing he continued in

southern and central california this week. >> my phone is on it's so hot that in sacramentor ge governor newsom is using fire retardant hair gel, ousand thousands of ten incs h fish have washed up on a beach in argentina. a spokesman for the fish claimed they're actually longer, but they've been in the water all dasman claor beee >> marjorie taylor greeneage sparked outrage during house hearings by showing explicitduri photos from hunter biden's laptop. horrified dems seized the images and sent them to the nearest children's library. >> that was good. this week, a tornado wreckeda to a pfizerrnad in north carolina. so it turns out god doesn't trust the booster shots either . yeah. carol. >> and finally, records showat

that linkedin co-founder reid hoffmankedin cn, one time guestm on jeffrey epstein's island, donatee d nearly $700,000 to joe biden's campaign fund. but i guess 700 grand is merech child's play to hiild's m. okay. some news is the attentionit mentality pushing alternative sexuality. according to the "new york post", owned by our parent company, waffle house, tu students in ivy league universities are identifyingdede as straight as much as five times as the general publionc. a recent poll from racist li named brown university claimed 38% of the student body isn't straight. rcent of universand about the r? well, they're invited to my places weekend. >> oh, sexist would say. >> and other ivy league schools have seen large jumps in kids identifying lgbtq in recenttq i years. princeton more tharecent n a yan

and harvard, more than a quarter. the one outlier is penn. just 15%. but it's located in want philadelphia. so maybe they don't want to come out of the closet due to all the gunfireto come the c >> but many students on these campuses say a fixatio studen on identity politics is to blame,to said one princeton grat quote, since sexual orientation, identityon g is largely non falsifiable, many people willy is claimatus lgbtq status to join the oppressed group. it be that students at elite schools are more inclined to be obsessed with social and professional advancement. >> end quote. but not all college kids follow the flock. researcher at northwestern recently sent out gender surveys to engineerinnd s students at a bunch of schools, and the responses were delightfulonses we , to say the least. several kids identifiedev as apache attackeral k helicopt. >> another a cis gender lizard l kingiz and another listed

their race as native american. >> elizabeth warren. researchers called the responses evidence thas cat fascism is on the rise in america. but if refusing to answer questions about your sexuality is fascismur sexua, then i'm beo mussolini. >> yeah see, i didn't say hitler. >> i'm learning. but this that instead of salivating over everything, lgbt, maybe researchers should stfu. what do walter, what do you make of this trend? is it because college kids are just essentially dumb and will follow anythin g? >> well, i went to princeton, so i can tell you that things really haven't changed because no matter what, people are calling themselves. >> what they really are is . that's true. i love you know, people go to princeton to tell people they go to princeton. exactlo y and they're far too

busy to have with each other. so. but yes, how do you get into ivy league colleges? by pleasing your teachers, right? by pleasing authority figures. so they've been very good at this their whole lives. kindergarten. they've raised their hand. they have, you know, erase how h the they've done everything that society wants them. and now they're doinol have raig anothering th thing that society wants it. but but the real differencate is that when i was at princeton, they didn't ask me about my orientatio n and nor would i have answered. i probablyi would have taken the apache attack helicopter. i like that, too but what's fascist about apache attack helicopters? they're going around the world spreading freedom and democracy. >>ound the they're actually thet progressive attack helicopters one . th >> but you know what it is? it's apache that is cultural appropriation. these helicopters need to apologize to liz warren.

well, i know a few apaches, and they're prettyn. to have an attack helicopter. >> loole ok. all right, julie, so i have a theory. >> would you like to hear it? mm-hmm. the reason the the reason this is happening is because the barrier to entry is so low b right. all it requires no effort. everybody has to believeha you.' and it's replacing actual self-improvement, which is why all the collegacing aclf-improe. because they no longer go to the gym. they don't car gym thee about their parents because they just choose a pronoun. >> don't you think that's brillian >> thin >> no. >> rem remember, it's his show. ohs show, it's brilliant. >> you must have spent hoursmu preparing for that. i did. hours your writers did a good j no, i have to say that i thinkkh this is just parist of our, lik, woke culture where they are trying to nurture over nature. i mean, they're basicall nurturr trying to teach kids that itm is the norm to be. so tso when people go into college, they want to be accepted, obviously. so they pretend that they're .

so i guess that's the whole thing. like we're all a little bit. like, look at kat tonighi guess >> she's so hot. right, guys? like, i've always had dreamsight about barbie, and now it's like coming., true.. i mean, i don't know. my next sleepover with kat is going to be different next time. oh, my goodness. i mean, it's cool to be, so. yeah, i'm from an outgoing is over. >> i actually identify as a heterosexual male. sexual >> but you already know that. yeah. but tonight i am a . yeles. loftis identifies as a homeless tracy chapman. yes. i have a fast car. and you live in it when it's. >> i think these ivy league kids are brilliant lea. sm i think they're really smart. i'm with you on this one. it's a get.arn thisit's a wonderful get out of. jail free card, right? you don't have to work on yourself. you don't have to be special if you fail at anythingl,like you're like, it's because i'm trans. exactly. and you cam trans.n blame socier not for not fitting in. and like, when i finished

talking for this little response to the whole trans thing, i want the audience to consider that i am tran s is and i just said was very brave . [app slow.e slow thank you. thank you. that took courage.e. >> they took courage. you are. you are a hero. re hero.you are a hero. i don't i don't consider. i just want to get on my knees >>ght now and think again. >> again. terrible. kat, what do you make of cat the apache, whmake attack helicc as a as a gender identificatiohn ? i think that not all of thisal people thinker ide about gender identification. and some of it has to dontd how people feel about paperwork. >> mm. the forms are soperwork. s are so long, likes ar the forms are already so long. we need to another thing when less than 1% of the population identifies as trans, i mean, d i went to my dentist the other day. how many times do i have to tell them that? no, i stilha to l not suffer fri

incontinence. >> and alsnenco what does that e to do with my teeth and gums? the forms. and they're like, how many times have to give them my email? >> it's like, you guys e-mail me all the time. you have my email like an ap national two month, you know, like how to keep your teeth cleaey send n. halloween like the forms are ngs already like six or seven pages long of things that have nothing to do with anything. the last thing we to do is be t adding more things to a form. because you know what? we're all dying. we should live our lives. so we have a chance. >> there you go. livehi ing so w lives it is. >> well, now that they don't require the s.a.t. at ivy league colleges, they have the gdp. plus. long >> and it is long and it's very easy. yeah it's , you say all of the . >> yes, that's true. and i am. i'm w t take willing to trying. anything instead marking off, you know, white, caucasian, hispanic. >> it's like top or bottom.

>> yeah, i always just write down. >> i'm the fillingphilly. if you're laughing, then you understood that joke. if you're not laughing, you're a good person . up next, we discuss what's really going with aliensthe pe and the pentagon. >> if you'll be in the new york area with like tickets to see gutfeld. go to foxnews.com slash gutfeld and click on the link to join our studio audience. >> the host of live pd, sean sticks larkin is back bringing you some of the wildest footage across the country. welcome to crime cam 24/7 and you won't believe what we found. every camera helps tell a story which you just saw right here was an up close of just how fast things go down. criminals feel you're being watched. sean sticks larkin hosts crime cam 24/7. the exclusive new series

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>> more doj corruption. they have been and they have we moved out of the city so our little sophie could appreciate nature. but then he got us t-mobile home internet. i was just trying to improve our signal, so some of the trees had to go. i might've taken it a step too far. (chainsaw revs) (tree crashes) (chainsaw continues) (daughter screams) let's pretend for a second that you didn't let down your entire family. what would that reality look like? well i guess i would've gotten us xfinity... and we'd have a better view. do you need mulch? what, we have a ton of mulch. so, you've got the power of xfinity at home. now take it outside with xfinity mobile. a literal ton. like speed? it's the fastest mobile service around. with the best price for two lines of unlimited. only 30 bucks a line per month. that's hundreds in savings a year when you wave bye to the other guys. no wonder xfinity mobile is one of the fastest growing mobile services.

you really shouldn't walk out the front door without it. switch today at xfinitymobile.com. is our mission to help it thrive. >> all right. did the military make friends with little green? lawmakers are taking the pentagon to task for allegedlagon to y up informatior on ufos starting next weekti, o

representative ana paulina luna. i love saying her name on a paulina luna on paulina luna. but i'd edited it. edited what's going on now? paulina luna turned in an edited edit. >> edit added that okay, she's going to chair congress next round of ufo hearings featuring whistleblower david. now that's a bad name. you can't sing david, but yet he's another whistleblower. g i'm hearing more whistle blowing a congress that when i walk through times when i wree time square in a speedo. mer in yeah. grush is the former intel officer who last month claimedte agon w pentagon was hiding a topas secret alien program, complete with nong a to human vehiclesdis and even bodies. >> he even says they're hiding info fre about adam schiff's home

planet anchor and the allegations have also renewed interest in the pentagon'sthe ae ufo department, the newly created all domainpa anomaly resolution office or blah blah has been tasked with identifying and tracking mysterious objects that could pose a risk to national security unless, of course, it's white house cocainetly se and yeah. >> oh, they recentlynt said one of their top concerns is intelligent or extraterrestrial technical inte. se is so not only might aliens exist, but they might be smarter they equipped, which wouldn't be tough. have you seen earthlings lately ? meantime, chuck schumer introduced an amendment to declassiftroducedy all govert data on ufos. >> in it, he repeatedly used the term non-human, which, if ab couldk about it, he have been talking about

his hair plugs. those aren't really hair plugst anyway, buhair pt once. >> but once what? but what once would have gotten' you laughed out of washingtoven has now become a serious discussion. but if everyondiscuse is so cond about aliens, then where the are they? ththey be hiding in plain sight. >> seriously? has anyone checked? jerrold pants? d >> julie, the good thing about the discovery of aliens you is that it will widen the dating pool. >> oh, my god. yeahen the dating . d nou know, if you're tired of men and you're not into women aliens, could have a third gender. a real one. real biology identity that you could attach yourself to. >> thank you so much for that adviceto . fre i hadn't thought of that angle. dot you believe pentagon

is hiding this wonderful thing from you? specific. specific i'm so glad you asked. so, congressional investigations are apparentlyno going on right now as we speak. in secret. in secreast, which has me leaves me confused and don't understand. it doesn't make senst doesn't m it's not like the white house is trying to hide it. right. yeah. a harris out ins out public every day. >> yes. evert her speak.work i hmm. i wouldn't be surprised if she commutes to work in ufn a which would explain the cocaine that explain d in the white houseame entrance where she. they could blame it on the aliens. >> wasn't hunteritaliens freigha was the aliens. well, when hunter's gun was lost wn hu, hunter blamed illegl aliens. >> remember that? he told the police. >> yeah, he said i think those guys might be illegals. michael can. they were talking about technical supremacy, but how can it alien lifwere tale fs be a match for our unbeatable strength of, our diversity? of >> that'ous a great point, e a because it's going to the next war is going to be a diversity war. it is going to be diversity. far

i don't care i tf you can go through dimensions and faster than light. yeah, yeah, yeah. i got four of these. how many do you have? it's like, oh, know, but for supremacy, a pick for, uh, i don't buy this for a second. i just think this is the pentagonbu looking for, we'v more money. true. they're like, oh, these. these the guy, that guy, thesee . now i want to see proof. this is like when your local station, they take the sparkplug cap off a car and then they it to a mechanic n and the mechanics. >> like you need a whole new enginewhole here i call if there's alien ships, i want to see them because the pentagon really can't be trusted. bunch of yeah, they can't buy him a bunch of new toys. they leave them lying around everywhere leave t. >> that's right. left a bunch of stuff on afghanistan. i'm like, oh, oopsie daisybu, wa got to replace that. then we sent a bunch of stuff over to the ukrainthen we. it's insane. i say, show me the alien shipsei or you get nothing. >> pentagon people. i wish it worked thangt wa, e.y >> they're still going to take your money. it's like it is free card,,

monte. >> you can't win. they're going to get it anywayyo . look, aliens under there catch you are you is cynical. is mr. loftiatz, are ys. i don't like being compared to him but i hate to say this it pains me to say this, but i agree with mike love thiree w thank you. right. myself the steam meter justeterd refilled. >> yeah, because i think thatnt it's either the government's covering up the alien thing or e alieknt us to thin they're covering up the alien thing cause they're actually covering up something else. it's notthing that they're hon. it's that they're always lying even more than we think that they're lying. >> yeah, exactly. it could be like actual militaryg even mnk stuff we'rei and we're saying these are unidentified flying objectng ie s, but we're actually testing new stealth devices and yeah, stuff. >> i also thin creatinstealth kh already be here, though. >> that's true. and you're sitting next to one.w no, i mean, like, i don't think we can see them. yeahthem., it's they're already around, but they don't want to tell the government here because you know why?

we'll make them paperwork. >> that is true. cat, cat, cat. okay. se it's going to be a long segment from alter right here. i know there'sgmre. >> that's why i take you for laughs. yeah. whrst of all, i know i. know the whistle blower. i know dave groot. i can prove thatis that the shw with my text messages. >> h e is kind of boy scout o hardy boys character who has discoveredt hardy aliens in hik for the government and is just bound and determined to show us all the truth. >> he's actually a very sincere guy. he's mountaiacsincern. he lives in colorado, sorado i wouldn't discount this completely suldn't, but i think entering a very risky period. >> obviouslyri, aliens don't wat us to know they're hered do right or they would do stunts s over the empire state buildingtt ,etc. so we're in congress going to out their existence and they have superior technologies. isn' t that dangerous. d america, though, may get itsan wish it may see a congressional hearing at which all our bigar shotinl s are there arranged bed

their desk with their glasses of ice water and they out the existence of aliens and suddenly a blu e blue beam comes into the room, vaporizes chuck schumer and i didn't realize we had a we had a pro vaporizing audience tonight. yeah, but i'm going to tell you, really, this is deadly serious. >> and whether you believe it or not, they want you to. you know, it's interesting isu too.. >> i always think about aliens as like, if we're the anthill, that's like 500 feet from an overpass. >> right. the anti the anthill has no idea that there's an overpass ther verpase withe with going up andy i think that's the way we are. w we're and we're we're the and lg and everything else is so big and so vast that it's unseeable. they don't want to be famous and we're going to make them famous>>ou and they're going to stomp on that anthill. >> that's what i predict. good byeing e th capitol buildi >> i mean, january 6th, you see nothing yey t.

>> the aliens do their insurrection. well, they just had those aliens that landed in vegas a a couple of weeks ago. so the invasion should be a loto a lot of them already come from vegas. >> yeah, already it's vegas is the aliens have been living for a long time. >> you see them at. the blackjack tables? yeah. yeah. i mean, look ayou see t the blk t, carrot top, all right? >> look at him. i dare you. i did once. i was waiting for a table. he was in line in front of me. my eyes were burned days. he's a good friend of mine. yeah, i don't care. i hate him.es >> up next, national stories make you want to snooze, then stic thek around for local news an unthinkable bill. took the lives of 6 million and of jewish survivors are still suffering in povertyfort y today. >> god calls on people who believe in hime,fort my tot on his word. comfort country.

>> my people, these elderly. are weak and they're sick. they're living on $2 a day, which is impossible. >> they don't have enough money to buy food. it a miserable situation. take to turn but to ask for helpd bo like thix s now is how god's children are living. the in hate this timete to sendews a survival forgotten. >> the international fellowship of christians and urgently need your gift all of of $25 nw no v food box with all ofitle the essentials they criticallygd for their diet for one month. >> let's say how to one no vitamins and no protein. t of h >>op my legs and hands are very weak. oh oh oh. toda bring them just a little bit of hope by bringing theym

a little bit of food to become de by reaching out to bless thesesr people of god for just $25,lar you cadan supply the essential foods they desperately need for one month. >> that's less than a dollar a day. a day. your support with a box overflowing with nourishing and the knowledge that faithful christians around the care and about them. god tells us tolocausto, take cf them to feed the hungry and pray. >> holocaust survivors will be given the basic needs that they so desperately pray for to. he was only 47 aneurism. did he have life insurance? >> do you know? you got to get on it. check out selectquote. trust me, the peace of mind. it's worth it. >> life insurance is too important to put off another day.

that's why selectquote makes getting coverage you need easy for less than a dollar a day. now get up to a $2 million policy with no medical exam and same day coverage visits like worldcom. >> we shop, you save me, carry sherry. they started the apparel company for women who ride when business took off, they needed alone. smart business tmz.com found them a bank which them an sba loan with a great rate. without smartphones, we probably wouldn't have gotten a loan. a place by bezos .com plastic task is selling kitchen products on live television. oh, stop. august the top six fight for survival with only three episodes left this not what we should be doing. >> trust me on this. the drama is sizzling out live. i can't hear him and every sales pitch make or break a jury. it has a 2.2 horsepower. that's like a golf cart. oh, my god. leading to the twist of the season. hold on. i'm not done yet. an all new gordon ramsay's food starts august 2nd on fox.

as the baddest superstars on the planet unleashed in primetime. all new friday night smackdown at stern on fox every monday. >> the mars explorer intensifies 12 celebrities embarking on a daring. oh. oh, gosh. in an out of this world competition like you can never see. are you here to help us with our mission today? >> will they survive? will these five. the only one will make it to the end. stars on mars. mondays at eight seven central on fox. >> coast to coast with. stories that matter most. you're watching loca.l news with 74 time emmy award winnerdp and head trauma survivor recently discharged from the ic u chet van jansen.n >>je and nownsen here, chet.

yes, it's local news where each guest has to share a story from wherever i from. >> and then i vote on a winner. and then we them. good evening. we interrupt gutfeld for this >> ge inte. news reports are coming in that america's premier newsman chet jansen, has been stripped of all his emmys this enemies after van jansen went streaking at a professional soccer game and horrified onlookers telling police that van jansen was screaming, quoted onlook, my boo work of art. the world needs to see this. we'll keep you updated with more information on this developing story on this as it s available. and now back to gutfeld. a tough break for chet. >> anyway, our thoughts and prayers are with chad and his 134 emmys, local emmys

,because they're so easy to get. >> i hate people who talk about their local. >> julie, do you have a local lt with me? >> i do. emmyi have to say i'm an emmy a. winning journalist. yes, i'm a journalist. i don't know if you remember. y forget sometimes. what's your story? twice. but, you know, this is going to be a bit a little bit hard for you to swallow. oh, okay. you said that before>> thi for yeah. flappa apparentlrey, hamptons me flocking to the doctor to get injections forget enlargement. >> oh, what a surprise. you doing? a story. now, as you know, i always say my motto is size matters. and i that sensitive talk.e talk but apparently nowba men going to the beach and they want to look better in their bikinis because i guess the speedo is bactheir k, you know? yes, i have one. so you might want to look into this. and so all is is injection. for it's like boto x for a .

it's perfect. and it apparently plumps you up and it makes it bigger. puyeah, it's like doing botox on their and they're calling it. no, they aren't. her and her husband are so. well, you have no idea the stuff that goes on in our bedroom. not in my house. he speaks from experience. all right. anyway, walter, do you have a local story that people injecting? r >> oh, my mother in law afterth the show. cashown move on. walter. yes, yes. what is your story ? a well, i'm from montana, and i had a choice of local stories, various animal attacks. there were several grizzly attacks and a bison attack.hat s but that's just called summertime. ye jsummer time.s. >> the one that interested me most was that the interruption, the breaking up of an eaglebrea feather smugglinkig operation. a man was arrested smuggling eagle feathers across the border to south dakota

because the border to south dakota is, of course, defended. >> unlike our national bordersui . >> and you see, i choose cho states based on the kind of organized crime that's prevalent there. right. you know, in arizona and california have to deal do i with fentanyl smuggling and human trafficking and that kind of thinth seng. but in montana, bird feather cartels kind ruled it. >> that is so good. that's true. that's what you should look at it variable wise. what is the big crimwhate. from yes. you don't they're not going to steal hair from me, but they're going to steal feathers. they're not to scalp me. me, >> t they're going to scalp a bird. scout mealp g to tell you,up montana, actually, eagles get hit by t by a car. yeah. because they're eating carcasses next to the road. this is the ugly side of montana. they're eating deer carcasses. ar them.n't knowople hit so we don't know how these eagle feathers were acquired, where the eagles shohe eaglet o somebody hit them with their truck? so i think there might circxtenuatingitk, i eating circumstances. >> i'm waiting for the trial. i see a fox. th i see a fox nation

special. we've already done the cattle mutilations. now it's eagles cat story. okay. >> what can you find out? wal-mart, other thand at great , yos? >> if you're in rice lake, wisconsin, it's going to you can find hail inside. well, it was hailing inside the wal-mart and you're how big was the hill? why? the answer to that goto some of it was the size of a golf ball. in other words, the size bal a tennis ball. and the wal-mart was closed on wednesday, believe, due to the store damages. but i couldn't finged anyatel updates, unfortunately, about whether it was open now or not. >> sher it wo somebody could plt me know. i'd really appreciate it. they always compare it to golf . i know it's always like sporting equipment, which it's like some oballs it always. yeah, i think they should compare them to eyeballs. the sizeldhe of eyeballs because i would scare the hell out of children. it's the size of eyeball it s. please. all right, loftus, round this great.

out. my, my, my life is stillfe flashing before my after this grow talks thing. now, that was terrifying. i'm from ohio. that's. that's where i'm from. and i have the probably the best story ever about a duck. that'story snuck on to a roller coaster at cedar point. yeah, look at that. there's a there's a duck d on the roller coaster, guys. >> got your story. love. cedar point. that's phantom tastic. yeah, well, this it's great someuse, like, the ducs greak ct get hurt if something were to go bad with the roller coaster,g o go bad the flies awy and just laughs at everybody else. and the fiery carnage so so don't worry about the duckreat he's having a great time. there you go. alypse and also, i'd like to welcome the apocalypse, the in the wal-mart that's biblical right there. happened in 2021 in oklahoma. >> and he did a lot of researcih . let's be a tall roof.a i don't i have no expertise or

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>> i trust the remaining teams in the baking battle of the millennium. they look like self taught bakers. classical training doesn't mean anything. it's a real crapshoot. they say too much. always all new prime kitchen monday on fox. yeah, you're watching mailing it in. >> welcome to mailing it in you read i write and then we run off together and open a charming bookstore in burlington, vermont. but then we drif onto t apart ai strangle your cat went a little dark there did. >> all right. this question is so i think when it comes to you first, loftis, because i pretty much assume it'll come to be a terrie answer. all right. mertz i'm just to say, mertz asks if you could be someone else for 24 hours, who would it be and what would you do? so all the others can think about that. >>ile he struggles can i would

be mick jagger and i would just shows and they'd be fantastic and no one would even know becaus ande the great thing about being mick jagger is you have to remember anything is ger is r . >> and everybody's like, oh, mick he's really still on topk, of his game. >> he's impressive. for 98. >> i admire the fact that you didn't choose somebody that could actually better world, you know, like maybe be putin or zelenskyy and end the war. walter i'd rather be cat interesting. oh, yeah. >> i went to princeton, you know, and think with this show i to i want to diversify my experience. >> you gi o and i know she has a lot of them. know that thats true is true. >> all right, cat what's yours. i wouly, what d to be nancy pelo i could learn how to insider trade. >> no.

ha ha ha h a ha ha. all right, julie, i would want to be me. >> mm. yeah like single, skinny, hot and dating somebody. amazing. yeah. you can do that. you can't. can do you are that well? >> not really. i am me though. yeah, sh.e wants to be cat too. >> she just can't say all.ll rit >> right. leo, what did you. this is a weir d is an interesting question but what did you surviveon that coud have or did go horribly well, i think i got to go to cat first because that's an obvious one. chapte to gocat r five five. i l i mean, it didn't i wouldn't say it didn'dn t go at all wrong. yeah, but i remained alive. if you guys can't tell. >> well, what was it, my bag. yes. what they're talking. >> i had a bowel perforation that almost killed me and then i had an emergencyatio surgery and it saved my life. but it left me with a bag forger five weeks in the pandemic.

>> you guys should buy my book . i'll back walter, my childhood . >> yes, i know what you mean. >> yeah, i was going to say puberty. i mean, i could have focused in and said seventh grade, but no seventh grade was terrible, you know, because i went to princeton. i mean, at that point, i knew i was going to go. >> yes, you're right. you already narrowed it down. yeah. and there was so many people i liked so many different kinds and none of them paid attention to me at all. >> but that's change. now you're i n esteemed, 're este prolific writer, known your faces, knowc n movies have been made out of your books. >> that's true. >>'s gotten me absolutely nowhere. all right. >> what say you?

what's the email again? it was what di agad survive thao could have or did go horribly wrong. this is sor di my marriage and m barely alive. i should leave it at that, huh? yeah. yeah. all right. michae >> aht, michl, i would just say existence for you. existence is. yeah. pretty. every day is a feel good day for me. yes, but most recently wasabou surviving cat talking about. and i've got this image of, and like, a needle full of poison headed my cards. and that's just. that's a toughheaded t one. >> i'm still balancing that out you know that every single ailmen i'mt can now be treatedne with botox. if you go in and you say you have migraines . >> nope, not bowel perforation. yeah, that's true. nobody causes it. but i know, like everything. everything. if you have a pain in your neck, if you have whatever the armpit sweats, carpet, sweat. an right.at's anyway, once again, i don't know how to get out of this.

botox. botox, botox me out of thisext, segment. up next, deep sea narcs going looking for cocaine. >> sure. >> oh, good morning. with the galaxy good, good, good morning. yeah. try dog collects chewy fruitthei bites for fast and gentle constipation relief in as little as 30 minutes, makinge your good morning. >> even better with all galactose. or >> she has no idea m she's sitting on a goldmine. well, she doesn't know if she owns a life insurance policy of $100,000 or more. she can sell policy? all or part to coventry for cash. even a term policy, even a termn even after policg y. >> find out if you're sitting on a goldmine. call coventry direct today shipt call coventry direct today shipt 800 496 9200 or visit coventry direct e-com shipgo

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beware. >> florida has coke and sharks., >> walter, that's your real name. researchers worry that sharks near the florida coast have comeearchers contact with smuggd bundles of cocaine from southor. and central florida. that, what say you? well, i think it's good news news. >> i know you're going to say no. it means they're very skinny. they're preoccupied with . yeah. ed witrather than biting peoplee they've lost their appetite. exactly. g peopthe hit that they used tot from biting off people's legs. >> they're now getting from a nice long rail. >> yeah. ea yeah. instead of. instead of eating children, they'll talk to you aboud of ea. their screenplay. >> and it's a great excuse for g. white house thin >> yes. you know, there was a shark

visiting biden and cat.at's w what's worse, a cocaine sharkor or a methamphetamine mean octopus? depends on what you're looking to do. te it depends on ws. >> but this is obviously because of the war on drugs. t mm-hmm. because there's bales of cocaine in the. balesey because people in miami were like cocaine. no, thank you. yeahthat her, we don't do that . no, it's to evade law enforcement. and now the sharks all addicted to drugs. >> yeah. they either get flushed down the toilet, whic>> it ushed doho sense to me at all. just do it. ju? t, julie >> you know what i'm saying? yeah. no, i love it doing it..nt i go back home right now.e oh, yeah? noe? ou mean cok yeah. yeah. oh, no, i don't do coke. nodo angators are conducting experiment right now to figure out exactly how and you know whriment ty the to cocaine. and i don't understand why this investigation is so complicated. i mean, just hand hunter biden a snorkel and a mask, throw him in the water, use them as chum. yes.

ene him asedd story. >> and it would be a lot a lotsr more cost effective. yeah, i thiny be more k. what? what if it makes sharks better? it's true. right at what? >> it makes them think they're better. yes. >> yeah. and then. and then the day they're full of self-loathing. exactly. they. they thought they had a greay ot for a novel. the next day they wake up and go, man, that's stupid. yes, loftus, this mighte and kill you because you can't afford coke. and these sharks getting it allo right. >> they're doing all of it. but you know what? the sea turtlef it, but s are ho because they don't have to worry about the straws anymore. about th it's just sharks are ug them. all right? and this is this bad for the sharks? because sharks power is being like really slow and like. appearing out of nowhere and scaring you. no're goinstw, going to be, you, fast, you know, and it's like, hey, man, i'm going to takey, you to bite your leg off every day. drumer it's crazime y hey, one e i partied with the drummer from in excess. >> it's going to be bad. ha h inx a ha. what's what would be dangerous

would like baby seals on cocaine. >> yea h, because that you don'l expect that thing to kill you. they're so cute. and those big gian y aret. >> yeah, but it's great when you go clubbing. hey, hey, he ngy. oh, yeah, it's disgusting, but you know that was good. >> walter. was that upsetting? i couldn't follow ansettiny of you know what?w what t this is? a rea >> let's be honest. this isn't a real story there. obviously, there's other marine mafe that's having the cocaine too. but yes, cocaine. plankton isn't as good of a headline. exactly. soe tw cocainankton people after i've g railing on this, no pun intended, railinn g for the las, i don't know, two, three,r mont four months, that you have to start understanding that none of these storiehave ts rea it's because the summer people go on vacatioe it's an.

and so all of a sudden, all these stories start popping up in the same stories that news to be in newspapersme stort would remember you had newspaper stories that filled up space. yeah, itat filled up would be n finds teeth in porcupinee and it's like it's so made up, but they needed to fill that space. this is those stories are they're designed to fill up space and we love it. wee that it's like national hot dog day who gives up they do this every single day. and i love it. >> all right. don't go away. do we'll b back here for lunch. yeah. fox news, the right voices at the right time. laura ingraham. real americans need to be heard . jesse watters. we cover the stories nobody else. sean hannity. i believe in faith, family, and the usa. greg gutfeld this close to actual entertainment. fox news primetime weeknights on fox news.

america is watching. you're welcome america. >> when you're with your friends, do you think nothing could possibly. >> that's that's exactly right. madison goes to a bar. things have gotten out of control dropped off in the middle of a dark highway. an initiative, a trucker. and you get to the hospital, you walk in. what happened? i promised her that i would fight to find out truth. >> left for dead straight. now on fox nation. >> i'm on the road all the time. i am that best theater. my wife and kids will tell you i'm not the best theater. they said dad. fruits and vegetables, fruits and vegetables. fruits and vegetables. so i started balanced nature. i did notice a boost in energy. my wife noticed it. >> i noticed it as i'm driving. balances, maintenance definitely helped me out for a limited time this summer. >> get $25 off your first order as a preferred customer, plushen a free fruits and veggies travel set. travel set. when you use discount codeg

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the drama is sizzling. how well i can hear them. and every sales pitch can make or break jury. >> it has a 2.2 horsepower. that's like a cart. oh, my god. leading to the biggest twist of the season. hold on. i'm not done yet. an all new gordon ramsay's food ,august 2nd on fox. >> do you know where you are? i'm in a dream. and in my dream we no longer have any hope of increasing our numbers. tell me where you went today. nowhere. >> tonight. i take it, then, that you are yourselves among the. we don't consider ourselves afflicted. good to see you here. good to see you here. well, then, let's get started. it's training camp together. weekend. good to be back. this is what we get inside across the league all weekend long. training camp back together. weekend presented by youtube

coverage begins saturday, july 29th. >> we are out of time thank you under-cover julie does make the catch up our studio audience fox news in not dreamy taste trace gallagher's this i love america.a ingr >>ah i'm laura ingram and this is the "ingraham angle"t week washington at the end of our first week at 7 p.m.. .m.?have you had fun?he we have. well, tonight we bring you yet another exclusive the gop lawmaker who received an >>g voicemail after voting against changes for minors. >> big you big, fat headed moth. >> i can't wait to read name your namine. >> the obituary. and that's sweet. well. laura: , we'll to that a little later. but first, campaign by trial t