jimmy failla lisa booth tickets are free hannity.com is the place to get them and rentaling sister, unfortunately for us that's all the time we have left this evening, please set your dvr so you never ever ever miss an episode monday owe friday. in the meantime not let your heart be troubled greg gutfeld is next and he is guarantied to put a smile on your face. see you tomorrow. ♪ ♪ >> greg: look at him go he drank so much water. oh, yeah, happy monday everybody. you know that family from your old neighborhood tfamily that if you got into a fight with one of them you had to watch your back for the rest of them? the cops were always at their house, they didn't seem to work at all. you heard they stole stuff, they argued in public.

they smelled. they had cars parked on their front lawn and their pictures were on the post office wall more than their high school year books. they thought they were the [bleep]. but you knew no matter what like an sand l sketch it wasn't going to end well. for them or anyone dumb enough to get involved with them. what happens when that trashy family ends up living at 1600 pennsylvania? yeah. [cheers and applause] yeah. the biden family makes the clintons look like the wal tons. so let's start with the thief in dad, friday he finally acknowledged his seventh granddaughter with london roberts, this aftering avoiding her like she was kamala harris. for some reason it came in an exclusive statement to people magazine making it their best scoop since they discovered the love child hi with angela lansbury. she was a hell of an animal. but here's what he said to a

doozy back in 2019. >> mr. vice-president i'm wondering if you have a comment this report and court filing that your son hunter made you a grandfather again? >> no, that's a private matter i don't have a comment. and only you would ask that. you're a good man, good man. classy. >> greg: classy. yeah, classy like denying a kid's existens for four years. keep in mind the bidens put up christmas stockings for their pets and not worn for this poor little brat. i mean that affectionately. i'm sorry but the only class joe knows are the ones he lied about finishing at the top of. joe's been stealing other people's material for so long, abe lincoln sent him a cease and sdichlt joe's pen shanty for plagiarism started in lawsuit

where he admitted to lifting tire passages, syracuse punished him by giving him an f and making him retake the class. that's right. he was left back in law school. i didn't know that was possible. this would be the law school where joe says he finished in the top half. but it says he finished 76 out of 85. so apparently he sucks at math, too. raises the question, what kind of dope would finish behind a doofus like joe? [laughter] >> greg: unnecessary, but why not, it's monday. back in 1988 joe's first presidential bid crateered when he claimed his ancestors worked in coal mine and came up and played football. turns out they were ancestors of a different family, one if britain and football called soccer, a foot they leave to children and lady people.

i didn't make the rules. no bidens ever worked in the coal mines although once joe did stay in a basement for three months, so maybe that counts. [laughter] [cheers and applause] >> greg: joe also claimed i have to his helicopter forced down by al qaeda sot at in iraq and arrested in civil rights demonstrations including trying to visit nelson mandela in jail. to be fair, he did think mandela was corn pop. all those claims turned out to be as genuine as joe's teeth. last week dr. jill biden's ex-husband bill stevenson went puck stating his brother frank threatened that if jill didn't get the house in their divorce, stevenson would face serious problems. but he hung on to the house and then was hit with tax charges in delaware, in delaware, a few months later. this would be the same frank biden who, by the way has been busted for dui, driving without a license and shoplifting dvds

from a florida video shop. let me guess it was god fathers 1-3. then of course biden's other brother jim, part of the famous business team of jim and hunter. hunter's laptop the filthiest thing since charlie sheen's toilet seat reveals that uncle jim's always been part of the game. in 2018 as hunter's dealings with the chinese oil became public, uncle jim was frantically texting hunter to call him and help him play out these deals. according to the washington post the chinese communist oil firm paid hunter and his uncle nearly five million in just over a year. i wonder what hunter did with all that money. i'm sure he invested it wisely in stocks although according to his laptop pics this by had more pipes in his mouth than an indian chief. native american. of course uncle jim and hunter

know about as much about oil as kat does about iron curls. and her family was arrested for dui driving without a license and felony shoplifting at nyc is that now some kind of family tradition. hey, who's stealing the thanksgiving turkey this year, kids? she's also been arrested for attacking police and resisting arrest. she looks adorable. not to be outdone joe biden's own daughter ashley has a rap sheet for drug possession and attempting to interfere with cops while making an arrest in a brawl. and then there's hunter. this show's only an hour. so forget about that chinese oil deal with uncle jim or the burisma deal in which he had another oil company, ukrainian paid him millions for his non- non-expertise and forget months cow's mayor sent him upwards of a hundred million over the years. yeah, and trump's an agent of

russia. forget the drugs and prostitutes. wow if i had a nickel every time i said that. but here's a guy who took up with his dead brother's ex-wife who he promptly cheated on, denied fathering a baby he knew was his and forced that baby's mother to accept a few of his crap painting as child support when john wayne gacy's art was far better. even denied the kid use of his name, which given his family's history, may be the one break this kid has gotten. [cheers and applause] >> greg: i wonder what joe thinks. >> no, no, no, look. look, i know about this girl. i just lost track, that's all. six, seven. i don't know much about hunter's professional or private life. i mean, i run into his on a golf course every once in a while, that's about it. but, no, no, she's great. and i hope this kid comes to visit at the white house. i'll find her a job to do.

you know, if i stumble getting off a plane, you know, maybe she could help out. you know, that will be her job. visiting grandchild ♪ she'll pick you up off the tarmac ♪ >> period! >> greg: let's welcome tonight's guests. if you're afraid of crowds, spread out and get comfy at one of his shows. actor, writer and comedian jamie lissow! [cheers and applause] >> greg: her communication skills give liberals the chills, communications director at never back down packet erin perrine [cheers and applause] >> greg: this ex cop did everything by the book. unfortunately that book was, are you there god, it's me margaret. founder of the ops desk.org paul mauro! [cheers and applause] >> greg: and, finally, she's like a zipper, people tend to notice her when she's down. fox news contributor, kat timpf!

[cheers and applause] >> greg: jamie, want to point out first that you and i will be performing together in reading pennsylvania on september 16th. you can go to ggutfeld, going to be me and you and nick and paul norton and joe mackey. it's going to be fun despite having you there. which ironic to me is that hunter's child wanted to be known as hunter's child. but your children tell everyone that their dad is dead. i don't know if that's ironic, just something to point out to make me feel better. >> jamie: yeah. i think it's always sad. you know, i -- all the joe lies you're going through, don't you think biden didn't count on verification by google? like, do you know what i mean? like google put a lot of [bleep] out of business. you could say whatever you wanted back then. i did a deep dive on this on

hunter, isn't it fun when you're reading about hunter, they said the mom of the child was a dancer? >> greg: right >> jamie: isn't it fun when you read something about hunter and it says the mom is a dancer, you don't go, oh, ballet? it's for sure a stripper. ironically her finishing move was the nutcracker. [cheers and applause] >> greg: see, with your jokes there's always this urge to step in, you know, in the middle of it but it takes forever because it's always worth it. >> jamie: oh, thank you. thank you sort of. [laughter] >> jamie: i mean, i was thinking about, this is the president he calls seven, well six or seven grandchildren, he says he calls his grandchildren every day, i was thinking he's got time for that, man, because they're all going to voice mail. quicker. >> greg: i don't interrupt. erin why do you think he decided to acknowledge the grand child? anything to do with polling?

>> erin: certainly speculation, not a good look, he built this political ideology and people believed he's this great family man, this great grandfather and then he's got this secret seventh child he'll never acknowledge but really they hit the trifecta on a political news dump, a friday afternoon in the summer and he's headed out for a beach vacation. he's not going to have to take questions on this for ten days while he's gone. so this was just them yet again trying to sweep this under the rug. i'm sure the polling doesn't look good when you have a denied a grandchild for four years. can't imagine anyone's super supportive on that. >> greg: yeah, going to the beach while you let that kid swelter in some ungodly basement. i made all that up we don't know if that's true but i look i can to think that. paul, monologue was pretty vong tonight i felt. >> paul: i thought so. >> greg: yeah. we found out today joe was in on all those phone calls with his son and they claim, people say they're only talking about the weather when he would bring his dad into the phone calls.

what do you make of that? when you were a cop and you were in meetings, did other police officers ever go, hold on, can my dad come in and talk to you? >> paul: yeah, let me call my dad. we're negotiating a plea, dad are you free. >> greg: yeah. the commissioner is really mad at me dad. >> paul: he killed his whole family buried them in the backyard but maybe you can talk to this guy. 20 times no less? first of all devon archer didn't kill himself, okay, let's get to that now, because he buried them. everybody saying they need a witness who can say they were there and he point blank witnessed it. let's cut to the bottom. joe biden, our president, has a real estate portfolio roughly equivalent to the british royal family and he's been a career civil servient. and you have to say to yourself how dos that happen and then you say why does that matter to us aside from the integrity issues and everything else. you have the burisma that's ukraine, he comes back from ukraine, he says i'm going to go

after the prosecutor and gets the prosecutor fired. hundred million dollars coming from the mayor's wife in moscow, that oligarch never sanctioned. right? the chinese situation, the oil thing. when you say to yourself, i don't understand why can't we be a little tougher on china, there's your answer. and that's why it matters. not because of the money and everything else, sure that matters. but what really matters is we're all getting screwed because he's supposed to be looking out for us and that isn't our policy that's his policy, that's his family's policy. that's the problem. >> greg: and, to your point, who did they keep saying was russia, russia, russia, was trump, and here they have a hundred million dollars from the spouse of a mayor? >> paul: and where did it go on the laptop he's always crying poverty. you can buy a lot of track with: not that i would know. >> erin: he's trying to renegotiate his payments for child support now as well. >> greg: yeah you have to bury that you can't brag about that money if you want to take it from your kid. so kat, paul makes a good point about how how a civil servant

will end up richer than all of us will ever be as a civil servant and the whole point was using that to get rich. aren't you mad? >> kat: yes. always. well, that's like a huge part of the government. i mean, same thing with -- want me to list everybody's name in the government, we don't have time for that. but the grandchild thing, look, i would never deny any of my grandchildren no matter how much they suck, because you can't -- that's not something you can do. and also, the grandkids whose parents are addicts, a lot of times the grandparents take care of them. i know this because i watch a lot of intervention and a lot of those grandparents have a lot fewer resources than the leader of the free world. so i just don't understand why it took so long because i don't know how you wouldn't care, but let's say you don't. if you've been in politics this long shouldn't you be better at pretending to care by now? >> greg: that's true. you're like the mr. olympia of being phoney.

your muscles for lying must be massive >> kat: yes, just pretend at least but couldn't be bothered to do that. >> greg: i would definitely recognize my grandchildren but not the children. just skip 'em. [laughter] >> greg: just deny but then recognize the grandchildren just to piss-off the rotten kids that i have. that i've yet to have. still deciding. not sure. >> all right, before we go, as i mentioned i've got a few extra friends and guest comedians on my next stop including sha lieu, list ow, morton mackey depaul 0. this is like an all star. sent 16th reading pa go to ggutfeld.com for ticket info. up next crime and filth are fine but not elon's sign. [cheers and applause] >> if you'll be in the new york area and would like free tickets to see gutfeld, go to foxnews.com/gutfeld and click on the link to join our studio

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. (cheers and applause). >> greg: thank you. thank you, keep it going. that's good, that's good. okay. they can rob, assault and burglar eyes cars but elon's ex goes too far. san francisco officials filed a complaint against can exert and investigating this big bright x sign to the roof which used to be the social media company's headquarters in downtown for a possible permit violation. what does the x mean? no it's not marking the only spot in town that hasn't been pooped on, yet. it's part of elon musk's rebranding of twitter to the new company x. it's like new coke for people too young to remember new coke. what is that?

i bought it. people had stopped installation last monday, but the sign still popped up by friday. and evidently the glare from the x was distracting to residents who were only trying to defecate in the street. of course, police stopped it because if there's anything police have in san francisco, it's a lot of free time. and this morning the sign was taken down. but maybe authorities shouldn't be focused on more pressing issues like, you know, maybe the homeless. you know it's bad when people in tents are reporting home invasions. of course, there's the crime, even murderers are moving out because they don't feel safe. poor guys. homicides are up 23% from last year. they're actually running low on potential victims. robberies are up 13%. hard to believe there's anything left to steal. and auto theft is up 10.5%. but instead, san fran targets elon's sign. officials say replacing or installing a giant one on top

requires a permit, ironically something that doesn't require a permit? taking a dump on the sidewalk. no wonder they're doing it. paul, you're a law enforcement dude. >> paul: rumor has it. >> greg: yes. is this like just not ever going to turn around? is it hopeless? i mean, you were here for -- you're in your almost early 70s. they didn't even laugh, paul. >> paul: thanks a lot folks. >> greg: that was amazing. they thought that i was telling the truth. >> paul: yeah, they did. >> greg: but you were here when giuliani turned things around. is that possible? >> paul: no, it is a' not possible. i don't know what happens in san francisco. the bigger problem here is that all of the major cities around the country which are dem run look at this and say hey that looks like a good idea following the exact same policy. philadelphia, new york's getting there, memphis, baltimore, chicago, you can go on. and they're all following the same path. and, you know, when you see

cities prioritizing taking down letters off the top of a building when the crime numbers are what you saw there, you know, obviously it's not going to end well. here's the real problem. we need musk, and i'm afraid he's sliding into the a business. we don't need him rebranding. first of all you can't say i xed that at you. what was wrong with tweet? what is he changing that for? here's why. we need him to hold the line on social media and we need him to kick zuckerberg's ass. >> greg: yeah. so someone was pointing this out to me. that, okay, when you pronounce x when it's in the front of something, president xi. >> xi. >> greg: so if you weren't on twitter it would be called -- >> yeah, in shanghai. >> i don't think that applies here. [bleep]

>> greg: come on, how many people tweet on the toilet. so, kat, obviously i went there >> kat: so glad you did. >> greg: yeah. you know the one thing though. what people don't realize is that crime could be worse if it wasn't for the potency of the drugs because what people are seeing right now, i think in san francisco and especially philly and our streets of new york if anybody walking around, the danger of getting mugged is far less because the drugs incapacitate or kill the people on them. it's like a zombie, it's zombie land. anyway, not so much a question as it is an observation >> kat: well the downers at least. >> greg: the downers >> kat: the tweakers are a different story. >> greg: i don't see many tweaking i only see the downers >> kat: hard to take pictures of the tweakers they're running around all over the place. >> greg: they're very fast >> kat: this doesn't surprise me this is an opportunity for the government to make money. this is the stuff they always go after. i had plates on my car living

one place to another place and they were following me, she still has these plates we have to get them back. i was like no i keep visiting. which was a lie obviously. but they got me but you might have giving them an idea, like they might start requiring permits for dumping on the street. it's a business opportunity. that's why they care, because he didn't get the perfect mitts and they can get more money off of him that's why they're making it a priority. >> greg: you have vendors in new york selling hotdogs, not very good hotdogs let's be honest but they're called street dogs, dirty dogs. >> paul: dirty water dogs, yeah. >> greg: why don't they have vendors selling mini rolls of todd piro and bags. >> erin: because it's still going to be all over the street there's just going to be toilet paper with it. that's not really addressing the issue. [laughter] [cheers and applause] >> greg: you know, i was told

there's no such thing as a bad idea. [laughter] >> jamie: that used to be a saying until you said that thing about the toilet paper. [laughter] >> greg: what is the solution, erin perrine? >> erin: it is to crack down down on crime so that tyou know, the bureaucrats and the regulators who are climbing up there and ripping down the x off the top of the building don't look like they're doing something they're not supposed to be doing. if you handled the crime problem maybe you could hate the flack are regulators going up there and taking down a big x but it's great marketing. we're all talking about it. if elon did anything he's rebranding but there's an entire conversation about the fact he put a giant x on the building and san francisco still has a massive crime problem. >> greg: yeah. so jamie you would love to take down your x. >> jamie: yeah. [laughter] >> jamie: that's good. i haven't seen an x taken down that fast since my divorce. that's pretty good. [laughter]

>> jamie: they would have left it if he had just written excrement. they don't touch that in san francisco. >> greg: that is true. >> jamie: is it not a little weird though? elon just [bleep] yesterday that -- elon tweeted yesterday, everyone's moving out of san francisco. we're not going to we're going to stay and then they do this. that's the part i don't understand. i feel like they need him. i was just in san francisco and there was a sign that said if you see something like suspicious you should say something, and i called right away, i was like, dude, there's a guy and he's pooping in a toilet. [laughter] >> greg: did they send somebody? >> jamie: yeah. i go, i don't think he's from around here. >> greg: that's isn't it. >> jamie: i think so. >> greg: all right, good. i always like to check. you never know. all right, up next, why teen

boys are liening right and sex robots that could cost a price.

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and learn how abbvie can help you save. ♪ >> mock it and move on. >> greg: time for mock it and move on. first up, a recent survey finds that 12th grade boys, aren't they all? are twice as likely to identify as conservative versus liberal. erin, what say you? >> erin: it's good to see that anybody is identifying as a conservative when it's so easy to be attacked for being a conservative. this doesn't surprise me especially when you look at women and the work that the left has done to really vilify republicans and abortion. so this, you know, to see younger moving one way and younger guys going the other doesn't surprise me. >> greg: kat two part question a, were you political in high

school, and, b, were you also a boy? >> kat: yes, i was political. no, i was not a boy. [laughter] >> kat: is that it? is that why i'm -- is that why i'm sitting here? is that why i got out of bed and took a shower today, to ask me if i used to be a boy. okay, so this survey, more of them actually said they weren't either liberal or conservative so we're seeing a huge rise of independents. >> greg: interesting. paul, what say you? >> paul: well, as a 70-year-old, thinking back, listen, 12, 13-year-old boys are walking bags of hormones. that defines all of their decisions. when you're that age and you're being told don't chase girls, become one, it's not surprising they're being pushed to the right. >> greg: that is true. unless you became one in order

to get them. >> paul: don't think too hard. >> greg: yeah. jamie, do you have boys? >> jamie: i have two boys. >> greg: yes. what are their names -- not what their names i don't want them stalked, especially by me. how old are they? >> jamie: they're 14 and snipe 14 and nine. excellent. >> jamie: yeah. yeah. i was a boy in high school. [laughter] >> jamie: is it possible some of these guys are conservative because people are like, it's not that i can't get laid it's my conservative values. i'm waiting until i'm married. >> greg: it might also be that they're just, you know, smart, jamie. >> jamie: right. yeah, that also. yeah. uh-huh. it's weird you wait to get married to have sex and then you get married and you stop -- when do you have sex? >> greg: approximately 18 months. >> all right next a woman is getting praised for refusing to give up her first class seat

from seattle to paris to a mom who wanted to sit closer to her child. kat, i might point out that the seat was also in first class, so i hate all of these people >> kat: i don't know if this is true at all but i'm going to go with it. someone said that the kid was 13, too. >> greg: that's not a kid pal with woman i know. i was at the airport a couple weeks ago and there was a long line for baggage claim and this lady goes i'm with a minor, i need to go first, i look back and there's somebody standing behind her a few feet, mom stop i'm 17. so i started shouting she's 17. so the guy in front of migos, i listed in the marine corps at 17. and guess wa they still let her go first. so, no, it's important to tell these people no. they never hear no. a few months away from 18 is not a minor. >> greg: yeah. they take advantage of all --. >> jamie: >> kat: we all have things to do all here because we have

somewhere to be. >> greg: they slither jamie when people get on these planes everybody goes ahead of you, especially you because you're like the worst. you are a a white male comedian traveling alone. no one wants to be near you. >> jamie: yeah. they go like, they go like, oh, well, plant number better than you. and then, a, b, c, e. and then they go, come on, jamie. [laughter] >> jamie: they use my name as the last. >> greg: i know. jamie. >> jamie: i hate when i goat on a flight and there's babies in first class. you ever see it. like i want to be the only baby in first class. i had a kid sit in the middle seat next to me and i was on the aisle. and so the whole flight i feel like i'm taking care of a kid. i've got head phones on, i finally take them off and he's like, dad, i'm hungry. >> greg: i don't envy that. erin, by the way the woman who

didn't give up her seat even though she's a pharmacist which i would like to get to know her but she's also quote an influencer. that makes me not like her. whenever i hear the phrase influencer, it's a dog whiffle that they're irritating and annoying. >> erin: that could be very fair. the airline is standing there asking her, ma'am, will you switch your seat there's a family that would like together and she's like wait let me film this and pull out my phone and get the good content on this. if the kid's 13 it is it's probably. >> greg: probably wants to be alone. >> erin: she's probably like please, pleads, i will kill for three hours away from my mother right now. but, i mean, honestly, if you're a family you've got to plan a little if you're traveling and see if you can get your seats together and if not you figure out a strategy, because sometimes you have an influencer in one a that would rather get the content than give you the seat >> jamie: greg, i used to be a driving under the influencer.

[laughter] >> greg: that's funny. i don't care. i don't care, it's funny. >> jamie: past tense. >> greg: past tense. you were drunk as you drost past tents? paul, what would you have done? >> paul: left the plane mid flight. you know, all i could say is, any time these stories break, and you get them once a week -- first of all what happens in planes, what happens in the area on planes. every time you get on a plane, like the woman last week seeing somebody, you're not there and all that the thing that's so suspicious is they're always good looking young women andr time you drill down there's some tell as you said it's really a career move to be an influencer especially when you look at the recording there were two parents on the flight with the kid. so if that was so bad why didn't one of the parents switch with the kid? right? >> greg: exactly. >> paul: when you look at it there seems to always be something going on and they're

worth ignoring. >> greg: i love flying first class i don't always fly first class because i'm a man of the people >> kat: no, that's because you fly people. >> greg: isn't that being a man of the people? but i often will stop by some place and buy the most disgusting magazine i can find and i will just sit there. no one sits next to me. yeah. who knew people hated oprah. [laughter] >> greg: i just made that up. coming up she threw a drink for cardi b for all to see. [cheers and applause] mlb chooses t-mobile for business for 5g solutions... ...to not only enhance the fan experience, but to advance how the game is played. now's the time to see what america's largest 5g network can do for your business.

♪ it's coming your way, hey hey, it's video of the day ♪ >> greg: today's video of the day comes to us from a place called las vegas, that's in nevada, kat. roll roll

roll ♪ ♪ >> greg: that was drag queen story hour. [laughter] >> greg: i'm joking. paul, again, you were a police officer and narcotics detective and an inspector. that was rapper cardi b over the weekend. she retaliated against an audience member that she had encouraged to throw water on her and then when it hit her in her face she throws the mic at her and now i guess, is she being charged with assault with the microphone? i believe. >> paul: apparently, whoever got hit with the mic complained. but what's weird about that video, i hadn't seen it. you can still hear her singing after the mic hit the ground. >> greg: yes. good job columbo. >> paul: i'm a little suspicious. [cheers and applause]. >> paul: you know what? i like the reaction and i think this should be encouraged because whenever i go to a show i goat board silly especially music these days.

>> greg: especially these rap concerts you go to. >> paul: that's right. so i think the idea that the performer and the audience can like have combat ensue is a good idea. i think we should arm them when they go in. because in the old days, you remember you would throw tomatoes and stuff like that. the only thing is, not on this show. >> greg: no, no, no, no, no. i don't want any of that kind of violence encouraged here, i will throw you out and then we will meet later for drinks. jamie, you're used to people throwing things at you. do you ever throw things back? >> jamie: i don't. yeah, i'm with paul. i think it's, maybe controversial, but i like a drink being thrown in the face. how else will i know when the date's over? you know? don't you think some artists though musician singers are getting -- i think they need to be more grateful. miranda or whatever somebody was taking a selfie she yelled at her. cardi b, they get to perform --

did you see the one where pink was on shave and somebody through their mother's ashes on stage. that's a true story. i guess the mom's girl was like i'm going to go to that concert over my dead body. [laughter] [cheers and applause] >> greg: true story. true story. kat, what do you make of this? people have thrown things at you, generally at bars >> kat: people have thrown things at me for sure. >> greg: yeah >> kat: yeah, i incite passion. i think this isn't really off-brand for cardi b. when we all heard this happened, nobody was like, no way. she's not going to like lose any of her fan -- you know what i mean? it's not cool to throw things at anybody but it's not like raffi did it. >> greg: who's that >> kat: when i was a kid he sang all the songs for kid, he had a beard. >> greg: i'm a few years older

>> kat: he had a beard. >> greg: who didn't >> kat: no? thank you guys. >> greg: what does b stand for in cardi b? do you know? does it stand for anything? all right. all right, erin, i can't believe you just yelled out bitch like that erin. >> erin: i did not. i'm being frachltd i have witnesses i have a cop here who saw the whole thing. >> greg: this is a family show. oh, my god. to paul's point about the backing track, is that a revelation that she's -- i mean, nobody does anything live anymore. >> erin: well, for the years that britney spears has been criticized for using a heavy backing track, the silence on this is desk. cardi b should be held to the same standards as britney steers when backing tracks, but let's go to the baseline. this is like kindergarten, keep your hands to yourself, don't throw things, don't throw

heavier things when people throw things. just seems seems like a bad idea. she was encouraging this and the d.j. was encourage it and then all of a sudden oh, no, what i asked for happened and you get upset. play stupid games you win stupid prizes. >> greg: that is one of the best impressions of cardi b. cardi b impressionist right there. >> jamie: i was confused. >> greg: i know. right now we'll move on, i love this story, he keeps it classy by pretending he's lassie. [music “this little light of mine”]

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♪ >> a story in five words ♪ >> greg: five words: collie, collie, collie, collie, collie. kat, a japanese native spent $14,000 for a custom made collie costume to fulfill his dreams of becoming an animal. this is the video of the first time he's ever been outside. is he a hero? >> kat: i don't know if he's a hero, but good for him. you know. like $14,000 to have all your dreams come true is kind of inspiring and impressive. like a lot of dreams are more expensive than that >> greg: that is true

>> kat: not this guy he just wants to be a dog in a park. >> greg: yeah. erin, do the dogs look at him the way female swimmers look at lea thomas? i have total respect to you but we're not playing against you in anything because you've got the size and the weight and you still have your balls. . >> erin: um. >> greg: in this case you can call that a bitch. >> erin: well, not going to do that. but i am a very big dog person. if i see a dog, i'm like, oh, definitely want to say hi. if i got cat fished by a dude in a dog costume, i would be traumatized. i would be lived. i would have all sorts of emotions because, hey, look at that, cool dog, oh, my gosh, oh, god no. like the reality snow all of a sudden you're petting him and

it's like, oh, this guy's getting off on this in a weird, weird way. i mean, paul, let's be honest here. we're living in a time where people are redefining their if he punishes as identities. used to be, oh, that guy is a cross dresser, he likes the feeling of women's clothing. now, no, he's a trans woman. can't be that easy, not on my watch. >> paul: quick question, what happens when the next door great dane decides he really likes this as well? who does he -- unless that's what he's banking on. >> greg: i think that's what he wants. he's going out there putting it out there waving his little furry behind and hoping to get a taste. >> paul: you really thought this through. >> greg: i have. look at this. god love him and god love japan for allowing this to happen. jamie? >> jamie: yeah. it's -- he really went for it. like i feel like there's easier

ways to get your wife to face the other way during sex. [laughter] >> greg: look at the fun he's having. >> jamie: at least he went 14 grand. like i've seen some -- i don't even -- i shouldn't -- i've seen some guys that go i'm a girl now that spent three bucks on lipstick. this is at least very convincing. >> greg: i think it's, you know, it's beautiful. very beautiful. look at that, look how happy he is >> kat: i wonder if he has to pay for money for that lady to walk him. >> greg: yes. exactly. and when he goes poo-poo who leans it up. >> paul: this is a dog you don't have to you can wa. like the perfect dog, it will do anything you say it understands your language. >> greg: yeah. and then one day you're going to get to put it down. >> erin: that took a dark turn. >> greg: what? >> erin: that took a dark turn. >> greg: oh, yes, this was a really optimistic happy story, erin. >> jamie: also like what a great thing for the spouse of the dog.

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if you can't afford your medication, astrazeneca may be able to help. ♪ farxiga ♪ >> greg: we're out of time thanks to jamie lissow, erin perrine, paul mauro, kat timpf. fox news at night is next. we love you america. >> trace: good evening i'm trace gallagher 11:00 p.m. on the east coast 8:00 in los angeles and this is america's late news, fox news at night. >> and breaking tonight in oakland california, even the naacp is lashing out and woke leaders, and soft on crime policies. former president trump's legal issues are growing, and so is his lead in the gop primary. one poll has him up by nearly 40 points over florida governor ron desantis. in moments, bret baier will join us after his a exclusive interviews with desantis. but we begin with devon archer telling the hous