studio audiences live tomorrow, thursday, in new york, tickets free, gets jimmy failla, day began mick down, lara trump, emily compagno, tickets are free go to hannity.com to register. please set your dvr monday-friday 9:00 p.m. 6:00 pacific so you never miss an episode of hannity. that's all we have. let not your heart be troubled. greg gutfeld is next. he has a smile to put on your face. ♪ >> greg: you've got it! yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah! happy tuesday, everybody! we'll get to the indictments and the bidens in the next block, but, first ♪ ♪

♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ >> greg: yeah! it's true. it's true. in the summer, the news gets slower than aoc playing jeopardy. so let's talk about me. i just got my back waxed. shout-out to the yankee candle company. here's the before. i know. and here's the after. huh? not bad. thank you. those are my sisters. but why did i do this? it's to make myself more attractive, if that's even possible. but i wonder as i get better looking, what about everybody else? i believe it's time for: >> gutfeld's scientific

institute presents, are people getting uglier? >> greg: so was our imagination overactive or are people becoming less attractive? it's something that i've noticed. go anywhere and you see how fitness has become fatness. moon while people take perfectly good hair and die it blue or purple where while others let themselves go. science is proving me self as proven by a fellow who apparently is a facial analyst, a facial analyst. sounds like the most prized job as porn hub. actually, mr. hassan runs an australian facial aesthetics consultancy firm that uses artificial intelligence to people's faces. why high school year books contain so many attractive people compared to today, he writes, quote, the average

person's face is becoming increasingly disadvantaged by modern diets, sleeping patterns, pollute ant and oral facial habits creating a greater inequality in the attractives versus the unattractives. so there you go. as predicted, now even faces are disadvantaged. maybe we can bus them onto more attractive people. but we're all getting ugly, the democrats would call that equity. hassan breaks it down. >> if you ever look at an old year book from the 1950s and wondered why teen-agers or high schoolers look so much older than today. there are multiple theories why this is the case but the one that makes the most sense, at least to me is presented in con dench regard orthodontics using what's known as the functional matrix high power outage sneeze what? get to the point weirdo.

what is the functional matrix hypothesis in simple terms? >> in simple terms this theory states that the development of the face is dependent of the forces you put on it the upper and lower jaw with 70% of the western world having some mall occlusion like this it's why faces are becoming less and less trafficked as time goes on and much of it has to do with the modern life style. >> greg: interesting. so apparently we have less pronounced jaws than previous generations. guess he's never watched the wnba. but also, older generations put more force on their facial bones probably from gritting their teeth, you know, when fighting wars and hunting wild animals or dating nancy pelosi. now, i think he might be right. just look at the average woman from the 50s. talk about beauty. now what do we got? [laughter]

>> greg: on the bright side, you could open a bud light on those jaw lines. but let's look at the average women of today. no! that's not fair. you could apply this theory to men as well. remember when men looked like this? hmm? now we're stuck with this. yep. there's so much estrogen in those dudes just looking at them gave me menstrual cramps. of course, some will tell you that people getting gas is a good thing, if we want to control population growth why not make ourselves unscrewable or maybe it's a ruse to keep us wearing masks frefrment all bodies are beautiful even when our eyes disagree but there's a rebel i don't want against beauty felt in art, culture, biology. think about how previous generations used to dress in public. to go to a sporting event or take a flight men and woman would get dressed up a full suit

or a dress, now it's all yoga pants sandals and hairy toes. this year entire ad campaigns are built around models you would look at twice in a wal-mart. not that i've ever been in a wal-mart. well once to buy a shovel a back of lie and a bone saw at three in the morning but that's a conversation for later. but now we're told that our innate disposition to find certain people more attractive than others is actually a form of bigotry called lookism. even though it's normal to be attractive to people who don't look sick or tired, puffy and obese or all of the above. it's now discrimination to find some people hotter than others, or maybe, just maybe, people looked better years ago because they took pride if their appearance. they had demanding jobs instead of staring at tiny screens all day. they didn't gorge themselves on crap and then blame fat shaming and didn't wallow around in crocks and ba jam as like they were inmates at a mental world. feels like we as a society have

given up. look at the cities and entertainment and travel. we don't even expect our models on the cover of swim suit rags to be in shame much less thin. and when we're forced to believe it's appealing it doesn't rink trachlight as keith said beauty is truth and truth is beauty. beauty or aspiration for it leads you to a truth about life. like shakira said, the hips doesn't lie. especially when they're in two different area codes. >> period! >> greg: let's welcome tonight's guests! when he's at a comedy club, they make sure all exits are clearly marked. host of fox across america, jimmy failla! [cheers and applause] >> greg: liberals run for safe haven when they say this political maven. former deputy national security advisor kt mcfarland! [cheers and applause]

>> greg: her fiery rants make snowflakes wet their pants. fox news contributor kat timpf! [cheers and applause] >> greg: and he's never had to rent a fork lift. my massive side kick and the nwa world champion tyrus! [cheers and applause] >> greg: so first off, jimmy, what water bed did you steal that sheet from? [laughter] >> jimmy: nice to see you, too. can i give you insight into why i do this really quick? >> greg: not really. >> jimmy: okay, but this is the deal. yes i dress like an affordable male stripper, would we not all agree. because it's 2023 you never know when you will get cancelled so you have to have a side hustle. if you get cancelled you can make money at dwarf tossing events as soon as this is over. you show up they throw you you make ten grand. i can't do that so i go with my magic mike look. >> greg: do you feel like you've

been discriminated against because of your looks? >> jimmy: not at all. because first of all when it comes to attractiveness people aren't attracted to looks they're attracted to energy. everybody has left with a 10 to go home with a six. i know because i was the 5.5 masquerading as a six. >> greg: i thought you were going to say you were a 5.5 master baiting. >> jimmy: maybe on the front end but he is right to say attraction has changed. like i'm 45, for real. my sixth grade girlfriend still looks young. it may change when she gets to seventh, you know what i mean? but this point is this is why people have gotten worse looking, it is a all because of instagram. there's so many filters now everybody thinks they're better looking than they are because we're manipulating photos. instagram should be called this is what i would look like if i was hot. that's it. >> greg: i think that's what we call alcohol. >> jimmy: boom.

>> greg: kt do you believe that we as a society have given up? i feel like, if you look at everything, no one cares anymoa anymore. i see people littering now. i thought littering was so 1970s. >> k.t.: i'm married to a man who wears a bow tie and a cotton iron shirt. >> greg: to bed. [laughter]. >> k.t.: yeah, well, the tie does get a little messed up. >> greg: oh, yeah. >> k.t.: i do believe in standards. >> greg: but where does he wear that? to dinner or --. >> k.t.: top of the morning, puts it on, goes to play a little tennis then goes to the desk, if i hadles with the tie, all good. >> greg: so what are you trying to say? >> k.t.: after 40 years of marriage i got kind of used to it so i would be very upset if he looked like the guy with the shower sandals flip flopping around the house. but he is 80, so, i mean, i guess that's something --

>> greg: are people less attractive now? >> k.t.: people make less of an effort. it's more about their own personal comfort and less about the impression they give to others. as a woman who came of age when women should be attractive but not too attractive, they should be hard working but not too hard working, it was a very different era. now who cares, right? >> greg: yeah, and that's a problem kat. can't we go back to the good old days, huh? i won't say that to tyrus. [laughter] >> tyrus: you know what he did? he just told on himself. the good old days could have been like when everyone sung songs and had candy. apparently for him it was when slavery was fashionable. kat, i defer to you. >> kat: no, that's great. no, i love looking really bad at the airport. i don't want to go back to whatever days of having to -- look, i not only wear sweats and don't put makeup on and don't do my hair, but i also never take

off my neck pillow. and i posted a reel of myself at the airport on instagram and people were commenting like a bunch calling me ugly. actually what they were saying is i was brave for posting that which is like the meanest thing you can say. because it's like just my face. but i actually, i think, i don't care that much. you can't really hurt me by commenting on my appearance, i don't care because it is a going to be changing as the years go on and i feel like if you look good, that's great. but if you look bad, that's funny and that's something that's even better. plus you go somewhere like la and everyone's so obsessed with looking perfect, everyone has the exact same boob job, the exact same nose, the exact same veneers. sometimes the girl with the a cup and the overbite actually stands out in that situation. >> greg: there you go. it's weird though, you know, okay, i'm a little older than you tyrus, i don't know how much. but remember far a faucet, cheryl ladd, jack lin smith.

when we were growing up we wanted them. do kids still have that thing for aspirational hot beauty or is it all just now instagram models. >> tyrus: see, this report is very misleading because they're taking out the x factor. because we've always had bottom of the barrel in the food chain. there's been ugly people generational. in all there's been a group of people that were ugly and they avoided pictures just for the sake of everyone. they were polite about it. the problem is now, all the ugly people have the cameras, so it switched. it's like the dr. seuss, all the stars don't want to take pictures now. good looking people don't want to do pictures now because they're not doing the shading and stuff they don't have to do it. like kat says they are who they are at the airport. and the ugly people are the ones saying you are a ugly because you don't have to put on 45 pounds of makeup four heirs and a child to go somewhere to look better. the problem is normal good-looking people who are too busy working and doing their

thing -- i've watched this go down. i've been at the beverly hills hotel at the pool people don't have a room there taking 9,000 pictures for one shot. and then when you see the picture you go, hmm, i don't know man, you're still ugly. those filters -- that's what it is. good looking people don't take pictures anymore, it's all the ugly people. >> greg: interesting theory. >> tyrus: when's the last time you went out and said you know what? i need a picture of myself. >> greg: i just complimented me. >> tyrus: because you'll buy it if i said that. >> greg: no i don't take pictures of myself ever. except sometimes at the club. >> tyrus: we were buddies for a second now the good old day thing again. >> greg: i just think good looking requires diligence and discipline. >> tyrus: you want to find out if you're attractive or not take a polaroid, no filter shake it and see what you see. >> jimmy: if you want to know whether or not you're attractive ask someone to set you up on a blind date because what they're

saying to you is, this is what you look like >> kat: not -- i feel like men don't care how attract i have you are or not. >> tyrus: yeah, we don't >> kat: men will do anything. >> k.t.: do you dress for other women or about feeling good your yourself or -- >> kat: depends. like right now i'm in my fox news costume and in the airport i have a neck pillow on. >> tyrus: there's nowhere else to put a neck pillow >> kat: i see the girls on the street wearing stilettos on the subway i'm like you don't have to do that >> greg: it's hard to run. >> jimmy: yeah, in new york. >> greg: we have the big news up next of course but first a liberal fellow with the iq of jello.

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♪ >> who is this idiot? >> greg: tonight on who is this idiot, new york democratic congressman dan goldman, he is the heir to levy strauss and [bleep] comes out of his mouth. goldman emerging from the deposition of hunter biden's former associate devon archer came up as a total idiot. he makes jerry nadler seem like a member of mensa. he's so dumb his nickname on the hill is aoc. putting then vp joe biden on speaker phone during business meetings when he was on the burisma board with the only shocker that even of the bidens was smart enough to work a speaker phone. left on his own, joe's more likely to get his foot stuck in a toaster. joe on a speaker phone, i bet that was like showing fire to a

caveman. during those calls hunter was always on his best behavior. sometimes he might stop master baiting. that's two now. but goldman is denying any influence pedaling. i wonder if it was all casual conversation, nice is the, the weather. what's going on. >> it was all casual conversation, niceties, the weather, what's going on. there wasn't a storm warningle conversation about any of the business dealings that hunter had. >> so it's just how's it going pops? getting enough sun? sniff any new heads lately? >> it's a beautiful day to fall off a bicycle. take any trips lately? >> i don't know. >> and i bet most of the time, most of the time biden didn't even know who the people were at dinner. >> most of the time, now president biden didn't even know who the people he was at dinner, he was just asked to say hello, and he would, you know, talk

about the -- he described it several times, they asked over and over and over. he described what the weather was. >> greg: again, with the weather. the last time joe cared about the weather, noah was wrangling animals to beat the flood. i guess dan goldman thinks we're as dumb as he is. but maybe they were talking about the weather. like whether or not to squeeze more cash out of those chumps. kt, this -- oh, i've got to read this, too? meanwhile former president trump has been indicted for the murder of elvis presley. [laughter] >> greg: kt, you can't -- 20 phone calls talking about the weather. >> k.t.: okay, so here's how this happens, when the vice-president president of the united states is getting on the phone with somebody you don't just pick up the phone and say hi how you doing how's the weather. there's talking points you get

the bullet points. what are you going to talk about. obviously his son give you the wink say this say that. the other thing there's always a record kept. so somebody has a transcript of these conversations or at least a summary of these conversations >> number two, the trump indictment, you know what this is all about? it's they couldn't get rid of president trump with impeachment and all the other stuff now they want to bankrupt him. because he has to pay for his own legal defense. he's already spent $60 million defending himself. he will get to a hundred million dollars in a very short period of time. and even for a billionaire, you know, a hundred million dollars, you pay attention to that. >> greg: that's a lot of golf clubs. >> k.t.: that's a lost golf clubs. >> greg: tyrus i'm not even a big fan of impeaching biden but when i see what they're doing to trump, this is a political prosecution. you've got to fight back. >> tyrus: this is where you have to stay the course, especially if you're a republican, senator or congressman. because if you impeach biden and you don't have the moderate

democrats on board, you're lessening the blow of the crimes that were committed before. basically the four-year coup to get him out of office. all the things they did. >> and republicans doing it now, it's whitewashing what was done. let the people vote on biden. because we're seeing -- america -- trump changed things, and they can't go back. no matter how much they want to go back to behind the door deals and getting american people to argue over race and abortion and things that don't always affect everybody every day and let them make their money, trump changed things he made it transparent. so they're coming at him, 71 counts sfwhafl all pretty much the same thing just changed the sentences around three or four times they have to get him on one because one's worth 12 years, which will be awesome because it will be the first time we'll probably have a president in the penthouse instead of the white house. and i'm assuming he's going to pardon himself. i'm not a legal advisor but when

you get elected my first move would be go ahead and pardon yourself brother. because they're not going to some of the you know what i'm saying? don't let me get arrestd. >> greg: yeah. i love -- kat, i love the idea of a president in prison. it's like a great sitcom, you know? do they still have sitcoms? i don't know. i'm very old. but that would be a great show. what do you think? what are your thoughts in general >> kat: i was going to say, about your idea for the show? i thought -- i guess i'm confused a little bit about the biden phone calls. so this guy is saying that 20 times he just -- hunter called his dad to talk about the weather during essentially a meeting. >> greg: yes. he needed to know >> kat: has everyone ever seen that in a meeting? >> tyrus: yes, every mob boss movie in america. >> kat: i can't believe nobody's asking the one question that i would ask, which would be, did anyone else call their dad?

because, if not, then they were just calling the guy whose dad was the vice-president. >> greg: right >> kat: yeah. i feel like thoughts on the trump indictment, didn't we already talk about the last one? nobody changes their mind. everybody sees it the exact same way as they've seen every other thing and we're just going to keep yelling at each other and yelling at each other until we die. >> greg: yes. you just described cable news. jimmy, last word to you, try to make, you know, intelligent. >> jimmy: stop it gutfeld. first of all, it's so pre positives truss that they had 20 phone calls and he wasn't involved. like where has that ever happened? walking down the street the guy has a clipboard, do you have a minute for climate change? no, so i'm going to call 20 times so you know, i don't have a minute. could you imagine talking to biden about the weather. it's sunny out. oh, sonny he was great in the god father i loved him he was amazing. i would buy that he didn't know he was at dinner with if it happened yesterday because he

has no idea but this is a 5-year-old, you know, charge. so it is a clearly a scam. there was some type of a fix in, and i just love that you keep calling out hunter because there's no market for him to get this money until his dad is the vice-president of the united states. you know, you've seen the laptop, okay. he's more catholic than joe, he's celebrating palm sunday every day. >> whoa. >> greg: yeah. >> jimmy: i'm just saying. why would he get the money. >> k.t.: here's the thing. they have really upped the stakes now because they haven't gone after hunter biden and so they are desperate, if donald trump gets elected again or any republican, they're going to go after those guys. so election interference? you ain't seen nothing yet. >> greg: we have to move on but great point kt. up next critics say it's unsatisfactory to have you grant in willy wonka's factory. [cheers and applause] kidney dis. there are places you'd like to be. like here.

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>> greg: mock it and move on. first up, cybersecurity experts warn that hackers could hack into ai sex bots and use them to blackmail or even kill their owner. kat, couldn't they just blackmail them by holding on to the receipt? [laughter] >> kat: yeah. i mean, i guess it's a good thing humans never do the to each other. >> greg: that's true >> kat: like someone you have sex with might kill you. like, yeah. >> tyrus: trying. >> greg: but it is true, tyrus. i mean you're having sex with something that's recording you. it has a camera. >> tyrus: it's called a woman with a phone. save all your texts conversations and arguments. trust me bring the ai on. cup of water, she ain't going to make it. this is stupid. >> greg: when you get consciousness, if you spill water on them that's murder. >> tyrus: we have to stop playing these stupid games. it's a [bleep] robot made by

dumb ass people and their thing is the ai might blackmail you? you have bigger problems. you're banging a toaster oven looking for love, okay? [cheers and applause] >> tyrus: like everybody in the hotel didn't see you with the giant suitcase carrying her in asking the guy for an extension cord to get her closer to the bed. come on, man. this is ridiculous. >> greg: this is such a great point kt because they never tell you where to keep the doll like when you're having people over. like don't go in the closet. >> tyrus: you run out of the room going the wifi's down, the wifi's down. oh, god what are we going to do. just stupid. . >> k.t.: i'm not going to possibly compete with that. i mean, tyrus, this is so exciting that you think in these ways. [laughter] >> tyrus: whoa. that was a compliment. >> greg: she doesn't want to respond to the topic. but this is something you were

so familiar with. he got in on the early ground floor of just inflatable dolls, right? >> jimmy:. >> jimmy: i will say this, because if you've seen them in person, these dolls are actually so realistic the only way to stop them from having sex is to marry them. [laughter] >> greg: nicely done. >> jimmy: love you jenny. tyrus makes a brilliant point. okay, you can't black mail a guy who's banging a doll because he clearly doesn't have any humans in his life to be embarrassed in front of. you know what i'm saying? nobody wants to watch a porno called debby does tech support. >> greg: that sounds fun. i would watch that. >> tyrus: not to mention, i'm sure every family that he's involved with, he's always borrowing the dishwasher at weird hours of the night. i mean, you've got to clean it. >> oh. >> greg: we should move on now this is getting gross. >> tyrus: it is gross. he's banging a row pavement as

gross as it gets. >> greg: you haven't heard this part. all right, hugh grant, get this, has been cast as an oompa loompa in the upcoming wonka moving angering little people who think the role should have gone to me. [laughter] [cheers and applause] >> greg: think about it though. thank you. thank you. tyrus, i should be in -- i should be an oompa. >> tyrus: no, you should not. you shall not. one of the children would get candy looking for them everywhere finding wine talking about the oompa loompa revolution not getting enough wages, candy's not enough and they would have to off you somewhere. this is stupid. oompa loompa's not a real thing last time i checked there were no orange green haired person on purpose born that way looking for a job. he's an actor. on that's like saying elf can't be elf anymore because the one who played it is the wrong person. it's a movie.

barbie all that stuff they're movies. it's not you. let it go. best actor got the job, he's a legendary actor. he'll be great. >> greg: jimmy this is the second wonka reboot. why are we rebooting reboots. >> tyrus: it's the third. >> jimmy: i think you're missing the point hollywood's now so woke it's a peanut free chocolate factory. so sick. but you know i hate this. i agree he's a great actor, but it's like, in the name of this type of inclusion thing, they're now taking away like the seven jobs that exist for dwarfs in hollywood. we talked about this with snow white. in the name of equity we're going to cut the amount of dwarf jobs down to one. >> k.t.: and make you feel better about the fact. >> jimmy: it always hurts the people it goes after. but you would have been in the movie in another world. >> greg: i'm already orange. >> jimmy: there's so many kids they don't want your ankle bracelet going off every time you go near one. >> greg: kt, i'm going to --.

>> k.t.: what am i doing here? [laughter] >> jimmy: just some tough love. >> greg: look, we moved away from the sex bot, now we're talking about hugh grant, this is easy. >> k.t.: hugh grant's good, actually a really nice guy. >> greg: you met him. >> k.t.: totally he plays golf with my husband, the man who wears the bow tie. >> greg: i should have gone to him. you know hugh grant, he's a nice person? >> k.t.: lovely man and a good golfer, very earnest about his golf. >> greg: oh, i don't like him then. kat do you know hugh grant. do you know anybody named hugh? >> kat: no. >> greg: no, neither do i. maybe one but he passed on >> kat: well, first of all, rip. >> greg: thank you >> kat: you don't have to be respectful. >> greg: you don't have to spell the world rip in front of me >> kat: yovrng i don't think we need more wonka. they made wonka and then they remade wonka and this is how

wonka became wonka. who's asking for this. >> k.t.: because everybody's on strike. >> tyrus: they already tell you the origin story in the last one. dad made him wear braces so he hated him and fell in love with candy. yay. >> greg: well, i'm not seeing that movie. >> jimmy: spoiler alert. >> greg: coming up, some are furry, some are slimy, but my animal friends are never grimy. [cheers and applause] at do we a? liberty mutual customizes your car insurance... so you only pay for what you need. that's my boy. ♪ stay off the freeways! only pay for what you need. ♪ liberty. liberty. liberty. liberty. ♪ feeling sluggish or weighed down? could be a sign that your digestive system isn't at its best. but a little metamucil everyday can help. metamucil's psyllium fiber gels to trap and remove the waste that weighs you down and also helps lower cholesterol and slows sugar absorption to promote healthy blood sugar levels.

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♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ >> tyrus: he's a jerk. >> greg: welcome back to greg's animal friends, the joyest part of the show where we show case

amazing features of the animal kingdom. kt i bet you have a great animal friend story to share with all of us. >> k.t.: america's such a terrific country. >> greg: it really is. >> k.t.: yeah. because in alaska, dogs, we put dogs in front of shreds and they pull people but in florida you know what they do? >> greg: what? >> k.t.: people put the dog on the paddle board and the guy's paddling away to make sure the dog is happy. and look at this he is doing this on an electric bike in water. what could go wrong, right? >> greg: that really is florida in a nutshell. [laughter] >> greg: i guess electric bikes are fine. >> jimmy: you want to know why desantis isn't closing the gap against trump? that video right there. i don't know if we can do this to the whole country. we love it but it's a lot of florida. >> greg: it's ingenuity and the dog's having the time of his life. tell me about your animal video

>> kat: mine is from my own home. >> greg: no way >> kat: yeah. >> greg: let's analyze things in the background >> kat: goes to door and carl goes to the door and says i don't want to be in this room if you're there it's a power move because jeans is there first. look, he's as the door, i hate this person at the door so much that i don't even want to be in this room anymore. that is a power move. and sheens, you know, tomorrow is actually the 13th year anniversary of the day we met. >> greg: oh, really? >> kat: yeah, there i am look how young i'm a cashier. >> greg: who's the ugly boy holding the cat >> kat: yeah, exactly. see that doesn't hurt me, i don't care. i do look like an ugly boy and look at what i've done for myself. amazing and it's great because he was abandoned by his whole family sick and alone and i don't know the life span of a north hollywood streak is but his whole family must be dead

and he lives in manhattan and has a cardiologist. >> greg: yes. he's a cat with a card i don't jichlt you don't have a cat or a cardiologist. >> jimmy: stop it. >> tyrus: i always felt he left his family because they were too liberal >> kat: he's like the most maga, further right of news max. [laughter] >> greg: what's your animal story? >> jimmy: it's about a bunch of angry hippos chasing an alligator out of their pack. there was an alligator that tried to make it into the hippo pack. they weren't having it. so these 31 -- they said it was feeding time, hungry hippos chased away the alligator. now what's crazy is this went viral but if you google hungry hippos every link is about the view. it's so bizarre. >> greg: terrible. >> jimmy: it's so bizarre. >> greg: i despise you for that joke. >> jimmy: come on. who among us hasn't been thrown out of a few get togethers you know what i mean i liked that one. >> greg: did the alligator get

eaten? >> tyrus: crocodile no. >> greg: they just keep screaming and nudging him until he's out of the frame. but it's from south africa so the narrater can't stop cursing a fun video. >> k.t.: nonviolent. >> greg: tyrus you're in. >> tyrus: i've got another part of my family zoo, my awesome panther chameleons, i get them from my good buddy, that is a bluer bare one, wild colors, these are all the males, the males get crazy colors and they're a lot of fun. >> greg: are any of them into alternative life styles? >> tyrus: greg, i don't think it would work. [laughter] >> tyrus: because when a chameleon gets nervous it goes up the tree. you're just going to be like, come down, come down. but we have some really rare ones with the yellow and stuff but, yeah, chameleons hooked me up, my little monsters. >> greg: how many do you have

now? >> tyrus: chameleons? i have about 30. >> k.t.: oh, my. >> greg: how do you keep track of all them. >> tyrus: i have an animal curator. >> greg: do you really? >> tyrus: yes. >> greg: who is that. >> tyrus: his name's chris. he had a gambling debt and i made him an offer he couldn't refuse. >> greg: that's fantastic. >> tyrus: so with one leg he takes care of the animals. >> greg: you all live together. >> tyrus: me and chris, no, that's ridiculous. he lives in his own a pafrment i allow him to have his own life but yeah i have my own zoo in the back of my house >> kat: now that would be ridiculous. >> tyrus: the reptiles live with me, the white indentured servient i allow to go outside. >> greg: he's working off a debt. >> tyrus: yeah. >> greg: oh, boy. to think what i would have to do for you if i owed you money. >> tyrus: you'd answer the door, and say, the king of the house has a guest. >> greg: all right.

up next, now cowards can choose d list celebs to break bad news.

♪ >> a story in five words ♪ >> greg: d listers give you bad news. kat, people are using a service

called cameo to hire low-level celebs to make videos for them to deliver bad news, like a breakup. what are your thoughts on this? >> kat: i did this once because my husband told me he hated the phrase spooky season so i texted everyone on my phone and told them to text him saying happy spooky season and then i got a video from the bachelor at the time asking him to say spooky season as many times as he possibly could. the moral of the story is what was he thinking telling me he didn't like something. >> greg: the other moral to the story is you can get anybody to do anything. >> jimmy: yes. >> greg: tyrus, it's like, if you got -- like cameo was hitting us up at the time right? >> kat: i did it for a little bit. >> tyrus: i just kept raising my prices. i felt like if i made it ridiculous nobody would want a message. turns out that's false. >> greg: but she can get like a guy from the bachelor to go --.

>> tyrus: you can get anybody thirsty. but, again, fellows, women aren't doing this. guys are doing this it's stupid. you have someone break up for you, you have to pay them -- mine's like 500 bucks now, i'm not going to do it and half ass do it so you'll waste your money on me so don't do it. you have to half ass do this then you have to answer for the person and the money and still explain why you are a not man enough to break up with her yourself. you're going a long way to end up in the same place. do it the old fashioned way, say you're going out for a pack of cigarettes and never come back. >> greg: it's funny, you can't say that anymore because cigarettes cause cancer. so you need a new --. >> tyrus: i'm going to go get some cigarettes and i'll see you two shakes and 18 years later. >> greg: i'm going to get some kale and i'll be right back. you don't smoke. you haven't smoked -- i'm going to get kale. what about you? this seems like something you'll be doing -- i don't know you're not quite a d lister yet.

>> jimmy: hey, girl. i'm getting there. >> greg: oh, like, oh, the poor guy. the guy was a cab driver it's amazing he's still alive. >> jimmy: that is true. the best thing about being a cab driver really quick. >> greg: dam it i brought it up >> kat: i know, what are you doing. >> jimmy: you wound me up at a party. people get into your taxi, this pertains to your relationship, they know they're never going to see you again they dump their relations on you and i had a woman in my taxi that said obama was al qaeda. i was like i drive a cab in new york city i know all of al qaeda. getting dumped on cameo takes the blow out because you feel better about your own life when you see what celebrities are willing to do for $30. you're like it sucks stacy broke up for me but at least i'm not

william hung delivering it to me in a waffle house doing one note of she bangs to say she's not banging anymore. >> greg: kt have you thought of any low level celebrities to make videos for you? >> k.t.: no, but give me a minute and i might come up with somebody from the 70s. i think this is so terrific, everybody wins. so the dlist celebrity is making a little side hustle, doesn't have to go on unemployment. number two, the person who is going to deliver the bad news is probably going to never deliver the bad news because like you said just going to go out for a pack of cigarettes and never show up. so he as least is salvaging his conscious. and finally the poor person getting dumped is getting dumped but what a great stoefrment you don't have to go to your girlfriends and say this is so terrible. you go listen to this isn't this crazy. >> greg: i'm getting dumped by

danny bonaduce. >> jimmy: point you're getting dumped but you have the shot with the celebrity dumping you. >> k.t.: that's true. >> greg: you're dumped but what are you doing later. don't go away. we'll be right back. of her refd to build an outdoor patio. clink! dr. marshall used part of his refund to give his practice a facelift. emily used part of her refund to buy... i run a wax museum. let innovation refunds help you get started on your erc tax refund. stop waiting. go to innovationrefunds.com you really got the brows. when moderate to severe ulcerative colitis takes you off course. put it in check with rinvoq, a once-daily pill. when i wanted to see results fast, rinvoq delivered rapid symptom relief and helped leave bathroom urgency behind. check. when uc tried to slow me down... i got lasting, steroid-free remission with rinvoq. check. and when uc caused damage rinvoq came through by visibly repairing my colon lining. check. rapid symptom relief...

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>> greg: we're out of time. thanks to kt mcfarland, jimmy failla, kat timpf, tyrus, our studio audience. fox news at night with dreamy trace gallagher is next. i'm greg gutfeld. i love you america. [cheers and applause]. >> trace: good evening, i'm trace gallagher. it's 11:00 p.m. on the east coast, 8:00 here in los angeles, and this is america's late news. fox news at night. and breaking right now, former president donald trump indicted for a third time. special counsel jack smith says it's about the january 6th riot, except the charges have nothing to do with the riot. we begin with team fox coverage, bill melugin live on what this means for the 2024 election, and how the other candidates are reacting. but, first, to what the indictment actually says, and the senior national correspondent kevin corke who's live for us in dc tonight. ke