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tv   Gutfeld  FOX News  September 25, 2024 7:00pm-8:00pm PDT

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>> unfortunately that's all the time have left this evening. set your dvr so you never miss an episode of hannity. in the meantime let not your heart be troubled. greg gutfeld is next to put a smile on your face. have a great night.
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[cheering and applause] [ whistling ] >> greg: you filthy people. i know what you are thinking. happy wednesday everyone. joe biden appeared on the view today where cohost sarah hans said it's like having one of the beatles at the table. true if you're talking about george or john. >> thought more like yoko. >> kamala harris will visit the southern border friday and says she's looking forward to meeting justin trudeau. at the last debate she said she was a middle-class kid. it appears harris enjoyed things most middle-class kids didn't like living abroad, private school, growing up at some of
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the wealthiest places on earth. the only thing she didn't enjoy was anani. i like her husband. [cheering and applause] >> that was a long way for a cheap joke. you're welcome america. new cdc data shows u.s. obesity rates have fallen for the first time ever. just like the crime statistics the they left at the cities of new orleans, los angeles and the view. reports claim i u.s. woman died inside switzerland's new suicide part. where can you buy one for a friend, asked one woman. she kills people they say. >> not messing around today. >> greg: a survey finds residents of wyoming have the most positive outlook on life. researchers could only find three resident press with a negative attitude about the future.
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liz cheney, dick cheney and a snow-covered buffalo. [laughter] finally cnn aired a mcdonald's segment featuring some of their food and brought in brian stelter to discuss it. [laughter] but the food was not so much a prop as it was to keep stelter from trying to eat kaitlan collins. he's a hungry little devil. correct let's do a monologue. after four years as borders are serving our nation's second-highest office kamala seems to have remembered we actually have a border. she's seen the light and it's not the one joe sbrocchi towards. she's announced she's going to the border after four years of denying there's a border crisis what's changed, why the 180? do you suppose it's the polls? amazing the other way to get a
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democrat to do anything is their fear of losing power and suddenly everything they mark becomes everything they embrace. according to a new gallup poll the orange meaning is winning and the reasons why happened to be real issues, things like economic pessimism, inflation fuel prices higher than pelosi's eyebrows. and there's that little border thing, that crazy notion of nation history has been allowed to have a border except the u.s. no wonder "new york times" poll shows in swing states like arizona and georgia, and even north carolina trump is call mall like a mouthy orphan. showed up orphan. and in light of how under pulled republicans or the margins are likely wider than a jerry nadler seat belt extender. suddenly she is for fracking and hasty funding the police and suddenly is heading to the
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border. if you doubt this is a major change from the past here she is providing a nuanced articulation of her previous border policy. [chanting] that's going to make her claims of being black even harder to believe. she has all the natural rhythm of mitt romney. ironically now calm last seems to be offered reporting her past. moments like that are captured forever. it's not easy to be a vacuous laying chameleon in the internet age. but what's most amazing, we still don't know what her plans for the border or for anything else are. sure she's going down there. what will she do to tighten the border to deport criminal aliens to guard america's kids against migrant creditors? wears her song and dance for that. what does she think just
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visiting the border like it's a niagara falls gift shop is going to be enough to get her ahead in the polls? so jessica didn't say up that's the border all right. i can see my potential voters from here. or maybe she will visit that little scrap metal that would have been from swah. she could slap up a few hundred miles of fence. the cheap labor is right there to do it on the other side. but the democrats are allergic to boundaries and barriers. and it's this allergy that allows progenitors to gain the system. whether gangsters from venezuela claiming asylum male defining themselves as women to enter female prisons are repeat criminals capitalizing on the rhetoric of oppression to escape incarceration. every system without barriers is prone to predation. because that's what barriers keep out. predators. 's what you are seeing at the border is exactly what you see in every place where dems have illuminated barriers to entry. anyone can game the system.
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it's our biggest threat the predatory advantage in a barrier free society. we don't have rules of the door. whether it's a country or bar. the bar will be destroyed and so will the country. even the freest place on earth requires rules for those who want in. rules that one abides by or else. that reads out the predators. but the left has deem such limits as oppressive and it's destroying us. no under voters prefer trump when it comes to illegal aliens. they really prefer him. a new poll shows voters actually trust trump to keep not just earthling aliens but interstellar aliens out of the country as well. i admit i will miss the probes. talk about a guy who owns the issue. they are afraid of him and other galaxies including the home planet of adam schiff. meanwhile harris can keep doing 180 degrees turns like tim walz when he hears the car backfire.
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we know if you change policy positions once she will do it again so she can go to the border all she wants. we know the real walsh wants to build is between who she wasn't who she pretends to be now. let's welcome our next guest. [cheering and applause] and his comedy show that two drink minimum is signing night. actor writer comedian jamie lasalle. host of keeping it real with gillian michaels on bill maher's podcast, billy michael. she's got two bestsellers and 11 toes. "new york times" best-selling author fox news contributor. [cheering and applause] >> he can feed a family of five. cannibals. "new york times" best-selling author comedian.
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[cheering and applause] jamie i'm actually very excited for kamala to go to the border because am looking forward to hearing her mexican accent. [cheering and applause] >> greg: this is a little travel hacked. go to mexico and run into a mexican gang, holding their gun perpendicular it's a party, parallel, get the [bleep] out of there. >> and i quickly touch on i think it's so funny the aliens they said trump would be better with aliens and they told us there aliens during covid and everyone was like okay. like never cared. there's so much going on the nobody cared. people were just like my god aliens. will they bring toilet paper? we need toilet paper. we're so worried about covid. thank goodness we have somebody. imagine if maylene came and joe biden was president and the alien was like taking
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cheerleader and they take you to joe biden and the alien was like i think leader mean something different. that's an excellent impression of an alien by the way. all day working on that. i am so excited to have you here. i'm a big fan. you are the best. >> mutual. thanks for having me. >> you watching the selection, seeing what kamala harris is doing. 20 thing is happening? >> i was paying attention to the interstellar aliens thing because i did not want the probe. i will say a little prude, i will also say maybe she missed the exit. showing up front for years late you missed the exit and shop an hour late. i think she will pick up europe right after the same told. i'm thinking it's alarming. and all transparency i am a former lefty.
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i try to route myself firmly in the centre. but i feel as though that cliche that the left left me, and some of these unbelievably extreme position salami and i can't wrap my head around how i got there. >> that's the story for a lot of people is that they're finding themselves themselves without a home. >> very much so. whether rfk, there are just going it's not like we don't want to be democrats. the democrats don't want to be us. >> that's it in a nutshell. and when you start listening to people like yourself and all transparency, it makes sense. there are things i don't agree with on the right. things i don't agree with on the left. but the extremes are deeply alarming and the fact we are making issues like health partisan or politicizing health and making that an outright issue for me is despicable. >> greg: that's crazy. [applause] >> especially since stalin was a
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that [bleep] >> i agree with every thing she said. never happens on the show so i'm excited. thank you for being here. >> doesn't bother you so is happens before an election, suddenly they care about these issues? >> of course. and again she's running as if she's the opposition. and i will talk later about joe biden on the view but he straight up was saying, yeah, i gave her all kinds of stuff. she was a whole part of all of this. so think about i always go back to this the dreamers. remember that one trump said he would remove protection for the dreamers everyone is up in arms. how many years ago was that? nothing has been done to try to actually solve that issue. everybody talks about when it's convenient and then my something else convenient to talk about they start talking about that. politicians now are so obsessed with getting the best little sound bites on tv or owning each other on twitter which is
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pathetic when any of us do it. but it's more pathetic when they do it because you actually other ones that you have the power to do something about this stuff but they don't so obviously now she wants to go there and say, hey, you know they'll say, trump killed the border bill and it's all his fault. and then trump will be like your fault your fault. and nobody gets anywhere. we'll be in the same position. >> where are the dreamers. where did they go. >> there's matt lang low. >> more like what dreamers. 's. what does that mean? 's neck doesn't anything. i just wanted to say it. >> i just wanted to say it because a into my head. and i have a show so i can say it. 's. is a mistake for her to go to the border? >> it's a mistake for you tl enough to me got felt. having said that, that's enough.
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just tone the blackness down for a second. what this is, anybody who's ever been on the wrong side of the parenting or relation subside when you are the person who either cheated or you're the reason for the divorce for the separation and you really want to show the family that you've changed, like i'm going to be there at that birthday party and she showed up at the border and she had the confetti and we are going to have a party and they are like, hey, his birthday was yesterday. so it comes back to the same thing. it's a little too late. you can't get it back. no one is full for this. the sound bite of her stepping up to see the border and go we've been there, so unless it's an apology tour which she's not going to do this is again just a little bit too late. >> all right.
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>> a story and five words. covid czar fired over. gillian this story makes my head explode. former nyc covid czar dr. jay farmer fired from his current role as vp of pharmaceutical from after he revealed on hidden camera he attended drug fuelled parties during the height of the covid-19 pandemic, when he was a senior health advisor to mayor de blasio and told new yorkers they had to stay home and keep the city shut down. meanwhile he's banging like a crazed wolverine. >> what's going on with all the
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parties. by the way i actually knew did he we invested a water company together. i was never invited to one of the parties. that's a real crime. like is it me? spee of truthfully so much of what went on and now that i know i can swear during covid was [bleep]. the harder they clamp down the more full of it they were. gavin newsom at the french laundry. we told everyone to stay away from the family during thanksgiving. >> greg: i think as the stories come out we will look back and just get angrier and angrier. the next time there's a pandemic we are not doing [bleep]. it's going to be all all the time. this guide boasted.
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>> imagine him saying all right guys pandemic is over. everyone at my house for an. guys? anyone? i'm serious. there will be cake. >> greg: that's just hurtful. >> there will be cake. cannot get the invite? i'm not going to go. >> greg: it will be in evite where you can see who is attending. as always the first sas. a guy boasted about having the power over people whilheas doing this. yeah, that's got to make you steam out of your ears. yeah i truly, i don't i don't
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yeah. first of all, if you go to sex parties, you're not supposed to talk about it at all. i know, even if you're not a person who's telling other people that they have to be alone in the hospital. yes. so, yeah, i think every bit of humiliation that he's getting is not anything worth the damage that he's done to society. yes. and to even. kat brings up the point about being in the hospital. think about all the people >> greg: think about other people that could not see their dying loved ones. >> i lived if you guys didn't
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notice. but people that alone. >> didn't pass the bar but i didn't take it either. it is motive. you knew covid only affected the elderly, obese in people with pre-existing conditions. if you weren't those things you can go to parties and restaurants so they knew exactly what it was and they chose to this to people anyway. how is this different than finding out about a serial killer? we know what the motive was. they knew what they were dealing with and they chose to tell the american people otherwise. for what. profit, power able to resolve for things. his admission should be having special council form somewhere or something because we had people's lives and forever tagged people for sewer fired
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because you will get a vaccine shot. you can have this career anymore. you can't have the even though i wasn't part of the group that was in most danger from covid so i could have held grandma on her last words. if i would have got covid i would have been okay but you took that from us. you still that from the american people. whether it is or playing parcheesi we don't care. the point is you ruined americans' lives and our country. we are not the same from it. our whole group of kids are still lost. go to a restaurant and get service these days. that's a small thing but across the board. at the motive for what was the greatest crime committed against american people by our government and they are smiling and throwing out first pitches. they should be next to diddy. [cheering and applause] >> greg: weather parties at
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your house and were you invited? >> it was a party for them and for me a surprise party. >> is it being surprised at a party? isn't that sexual harassment? >> being surprised proves you weren't invited. i would never have a party. i don't like cleaning up after regular party. >> i had a bad experience and they told me i was never allowed back. it started 6:00 p.m. and they told me i came too early. and i go it's only six. it was 5 minutes to six. i thought that was fine. i got invited to a party wants. i misunderstood. it was a gender revealed party.
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i was deep into it when i found it was a guy and i yelled it's a boy and ran out. [laughter] >> isn't it weird to live in a time where you can go to multiple gender revealed parties for the same kid? >> greg: you pose very valuable questions. >> those were good ones. we are going to move on. coming up the view's newest resident is our demented president
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>> speaker-08: thank you. joe biden good student we eulogized by the cast that's plus sized. are video of the day comes to us from the ladies of the view and president biden swung by the show this morning to let this holding panel hyenas lick his wounds. i don't know what you guys thank our but in bad taste. roletta. >> it was only two months ago you decided to step aside from seeking reelection putting your country first above any personal ambition. [cheering and applause] and passing the torch to the vice-- mike riddle of the beatles. >> you said you would have an administration that looked like america, and with so many other things you delivered. you gave us a very diverse cabinet so thank you.
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thank you for that. you were my ride or die. i was going wherever you're going. that's where i was going. >> ride or die. is already dead. i haven't seen a tongue bath like that since i fell into the hypopet seaworld. when you look at him do instantly think of the beatles? >> i get why he left the house for that. like it was unbelievable. paul mccartney is older than he is. >> is that crazy? >> nisi him live not to too long ago three-hour show no brakes playing all these instruments singing the whole time. i always said the joe biden thing not about age. some thing else going on. we knew it would be like this. i still couldn't believe just how much it was. but in a way it's like what you want from the guy? he's just sitting there like sam good. it was something sad about it.
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like when he said that he definitely could have beaten trump and that's not why he dropped out and there like totally. totally. why did you? >> why did you go? >> it was his choice. do think you thought he was on animal planet? >> no. now my cue not an animal planet. because if he was on animal planet the animals would have made him. out of respect for the dying what lions do. like set there and you can check this is why i hate the term ride or die. because it's a ride or die. you can't say you were my ride or die. so if he died hello it's die time. so since he's dying from the political world and his job shouldn't you die from your is ms goldberg?
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be consistent. if you're dating somebody and she tells you i am ride or die she's lying. she is your ride or until the next guy has his [bleep] together. and then she died inside and left you. but that's what kills me. the best part about this is as awkward as it is the president won't remember it tomorrow so everything he went through he won't forget. but it was sad they are trying to coach and pull answers out of him try to tell him this or whatever. he didn't know that he wasn't running anymore. he was arguing with them like i could be my numbers are as good as his. was next. who's next. it felt like a cross between kindergarten graduation and a funeral. secular someone to divorce but the entire family is acting like a divorce is a great time. you will be so happy alone in
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the home. >> you know what? they all should have been wearing those shirts the end of dateline where they have the victim on the shirt. should have been like joe's. that would've been amazing. pink shirt with joe on it. didn't your family where that when they kicked you out? [ crowd gasps ] just punch in. do it. joe was my think you're going to die in this interview i sort of thought we are done with joe and then here he comes back. can i ask a favour? if i ever have three months to live i want you to play this interview in the background so it seems longer. it was painful. painful to watch. did you see there was one part that he said, i forgot who said it but they said trump was like a bug and then joe biden leans
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over and he smashes echo would have done anything that has tricep is sore tomorrow. that's how little he knew. >> have you redone the view? >> i did ones. i've never seen place not be a rabbit henhouse outside of joe and kamala. if you can forgive me and i can put my liberal had on from moment here, the thing with joe biden, when did we pretend this guy was the second coming of? as a liberal who voted liberal my entire life he was always the bad guy. this guy is responsible for the 94 crime build. he is systemic racism wrapped up into one human. this is the guy that eulogized thurman. this is the guy that made racist remarks about obama. this is the guy that was anti-gay marriage. much time do we have?
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when are we pretending he was? >> he ran for president four times. nobody like him. >> now that his brain doesn't work good he's whatever you want him to be. >> i think so. but i remember that he was never the guy. >> he was never the guy. i was voting for the people were running against that guy and we had all these problems. like you are my ride or die. i can't. the hypocrisy sickens me. i can't. >> greg: we will see a lot more of the farewell tours i predict because he will be farewell for the next year. coming up watch a criminal survive an arrest johnny five.
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>> he couldn't stop robocop ivy otd comes from the days in hotel i love the days in hotel. especially the one in texas where criminal hold up in his room and was taken down by a bomb squad robot crazy. who knew they still hotels not filled with migrants. the wanted man exchanged gunfire with police huan cao are stand-up before being brought to heel by an officer made of steel. watch this play-by-play by a local reporter. >> we watched as he went in and out of the hotel room waving a bible. officers deployed the regional bomb squad robot. de la rosa tries to push the robot away. even she said. that doesn't stop the robot. but eventually dispenses the gas into the room. you can then see de la rosa crawling out through the windo
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i really didn't expect that response from the audience. th a
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big deal for them. this is the first time white people aren't going to be blamed for police violence. [laughter] there like it's not us. it's the robot. >> you better hope the person controlling him was a white guy. >> it's on the robot if it is controlled by somebody else. >> i would have ran over him but i think people need to see this, that apprehending criminals is not easy. even robots have to [bleep] them up sometimes. but he did everything right. it is true the, you know, you eliminate the emotion from an arrest, that's got to be good. did that happen with you when you were arrested? >> yeah, filak of the machines end up taking over its now our fault. that we are having these robots and also i spent some time at
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days in, and you can tell if you look at a hotel like this you go to a hotel and you open your door the parking lot is there you've made a series of bad decisions in your life. i stated days in about a month ago and call the front desk and go him and i got a leak in my sink and the guy goes go ahead. i don't give a [bleep]. just lastly it was the stand-up was two hours with the s.w.a.t. team and then the robot did that why do you think they didn't earlier, a guy didn't go my god, i have a robot that can do this. it took so long. they had to go through the
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paperwork. there to exercise every alternative before sending him in spirit johnson forgot to charge him from the last drug hoist. >> what you make of this? is this a promising sign of our future? 's. i was wondering where could get one like a wonder if this would get my kids out of bed. four-wheel right over him. cannot i mean creek that's amazing. that was so impressed. >> you notice the robot had gas? >> i think i'm glad you did though. this is something that could be great for texas. i think you could use that in manhattan though. it just looks kind of like performance art. you know what i mean? if you did this in brooklyn people would be like come and take pictures until the guy they liked his installation. meanwhile he's a dangerous
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drug dealer with the gun see couldn't do that here. >> i liked how he threw the towel on. >> pixar vibes. they even pants to the guy at the end. >> greg: i believe the suspect was then put in custody but the robot went to a local bar ended shots of wd-40 and then got in a fight with a fireman. is that just a new york thing? >> yeah. >> greg: cops and firemen don't get along. >> that's everywhere. wherever they have semipro football. firemen verse the police. that's a big thing. that fizzled out. but i don't care. show still goes on. i am a pro. [cheering and applause] up next has ozempic done the trick to make people less that?
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>> five more words. ♪ ♪ [cheering and applause] >> greg: obesity rates drop. blame ozempic. bajillion this is interesting. the cdc since american obesity rates have dropped for the first time ever. like 40%. now versus 42%, but they think
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ozempic had a role. what do you make of the whole ozempic thing because it's in your we house, so to speak? >> gas has gone up so much more people are walking. jamie hold my beer for a second. okay i'm going to be dead serious what's going on here. first of all, we are seeing disease on a mass scale work autism, one in 30 kids. used to be one in 100,000. 79% increase in early-onset cancer diagnosis. guys today at 30 years old have the testosterone level of f a 50-year-old man 30 years ago. autoimmune issues going up. teens have fatty liver disease. people, obesity is at the highest rate it's ever been. it's all going up at skyrocketing rates all at the same time. this is a distraction. this is [bleep]. this does not happen in the silo. >> greg: who do you blame? may need to blame somebody. >> i blame, the catastrophic
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quartet. it's just a sinister convergence of economic incentive between big pharma, big farming, big insurance and this is called structural violence. it is by design and i was just with a group of mds and health advocates at at the capital a few days ago. doing a hearing to the senate about this issue. we need a systemic change because at the end of the day no matter how much agency you take, no matter how much you go to the gym or get your broccoli, you're still not getting them metals out of your fish, the plastic of your food, toxins out of your. it is all connected. >> greg: i love the plastic in my food. it's interesting. when i was young there was only one fat kid in the class. we would call him husky by his clothes and the husky section.
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he was chubby and popular because he had the best snacks at home. now it's the reverse. you drive by a bus stop sometimes slowly and you see the kids. there's one skinny kid. >> i am getting fatter this year. >> you are. >> greg: you are a pudgy woman. >> it's weird i keep bumping into things because i'm not used to having hips. so you are saying i should not go on ozempic immediately after i give birth. >> please never. >> i have to do diet and exercise. >> you look great. get back to the way you were prebaby and give yourself time. take a year. >> a year. >> or i could do ozempic. >> i can tell you what happens if you do and i don't think you like it. >> do i get the face? >> that could happen. 50% chance of nausea, vomiting, constipation, diarrhea.
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>> greg: that's my life. >> those suck periods. push the up button. pancreatitis, stomach paralysis, thyroid cancer. you plateau on. it cost a fortune. and 66% of the people that go on get off of it in the first year from prime therapeutics, pharmacy benefit manager for blue cross, blue shield. this is a distraction. do not take the bait. the stuff is poison. [cheering and applause] >> that's very interesting. >> greg: you used to exercise. what do you think? >> you not to push back a little bit but i feel like the nausea and diarrhea would help with the wait loss even further. >> sort as methamphetamines and cigarettes. doesn't make it good for you. >> i heard chris christie is competing in the winter ozempic's next year. [cheering and applause] >> you know what just happened? gillian was talking and goes
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like a young dude now they have the testosterone level of a 50-year-old man. i was like holy [bleep] i have the testosterone of a 50-year-old man. i am a 50-year-old man. >> greg: that was a criticism. >> that's me. remember when you're younger and sports and you have a coach and they go, go run and catch the ball. when you get older you are your own coach. that's the problem. you're like, hey, run over there. and you're like, hey, [bleep] you. i don't want to. >> sure. rfk jr. said it best. the whole point of what we went through during the pandemic was the group that was all of the diseases from the bad food. if you go to france and drink wine and bread you don't gain wait. you do that [bleep] here you are 500 pounds.
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it's just profit over people. that's basically what it comes down to. the only way you will lose wait is by burning more than you taken and there's nothing else for. ozempic attacks your muscles not your fat. so you are a skinny fat person. >> it is true. >> every türkiye in america is like what it is. >> greg: we have to move on. we will be right back. , it's per strengthening roots to help protect it all winter. more like perfect for giving the grass a deeper green come spring. sounds like it's perfect for your neighbor. - yeah! - who's gonna take this bag. wait, what? and borrow your spreader. thanks, guys. - you're welcome! - enjoy it! i'm going back in the shed. download the my lawn app today for lawn care tips and customized plans. feed your lawn. feed it.
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>> trace: thank you to our guests and studio audience, "fox news at night" is coming up, i love you, america. [cheering and applause] >> speaker-01: good evening, i'm trace gallagher, 11:00 p.m. on the east coast,

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