particular. people were sitting. they brought chairs out for them to sit in. some people said they couldn't come back tuesday to vote. i guess maybe they didn't have enough workers inside the polling place, but that's concerning. we hope everybody has the right to vote. they have the right to vote. how they can actually get to vote. seven years ago this week, the ingraham angle launched. i think raymond is still with us. raymond, what was your favorite moment from the seven years on the show? well, well, look, just being a part of it. but the d-day, the 75th anniversary of d-day. laura, that was incredible. and are you viral moment? those are two that stand out to me. but every week, every friday is a great week to me. and of course, sam and brett and elisa and dave and mike and mike and everybody. jesse's next 7 p.m. on sunday. we'll be back. hello everybody. i'm martha

maccallum, along with judge jeanine pirro, jessica tarlov, jesse watters and greg gutfeld. it's 5:00 in new york on a friday, i would add. and this is the five. so, i mean, these are happening basically by the hour. all of these comments, some out of context controversies flying from left to right, dominating the conversation with just four days to go, matt drudge blaring out this headline that says, quote, trump calls for cheney's execution and other outlets quickly following suit as they mischaracterized some comments by former president trump made last night about liz cheney being a war hawk. but listen to this closely. she's a radical war hawk. let's put her with a rifle standing there with nine barrel shooting at her. okay, let's see how she feels about it. you know, when the guns are trained on her face, you know, they're all war hawks when

they're sitting in washington in a nice building saying, oh, gee, will, let's send let's send 10,000 troops right into the mouth of the enemy. but she's a stupid person. so the press wasted. no time to follow judge's lead. and did twist those comments. watch this. violent rhetoric donald trump going after political foe liz cheney. donald trump calling for liz cheney being shot in the face. this is not acceptable. this is so dangerous. isn't that statement a disqualifying statement? it should be. why is he allowed to run for president? i fled communism, this is exactly what communists do. they shoot their opponents. let's just be clear. when you talk about nine barrels. i'm sorry for all the folks out there who want to dance on the head of a pin. that is what he is talking about. an execution fantasy. an execution fantasy. so call it team trump calling it the latest fake media outrage, saying that former president trump was clearly calling liz

cheney a war hawk. but that clarification did not stop kamala harris from running to the reporters. watch what she said he has increased his violent rhetoric donald trump has about political opponents. and in great detail, in great detail, suggested rifles should be trained on former representative liz cheney. this must be disqualifying anyone who wants to be president of the united states who uses that kind of violent rhetoric is clearly disqualified and unqualified to be president. and the former president defending himself against the media barrage while visiting a coffee shop today in michigan. i think that liz cheney is a disaster. all she wants to do is blow people up. she's a war hawk and a dumb one at that. and if you ever put her into the field of battle, she'd be the first one to check it out.

she wouldn't fight. she'd chicken out. so fast. and that's all i say. these are the people they don't mind killing people. but if they had to do it themselves, she wouldn't fight. she's a coward. i mean, i think it's pretty clear, janine, from his comments and you know, i went back and listened to the exchange around this. it's very clear. and it's really so reprehensible to me when i watch those other comments by members of the media to not even mention the fact that the discussion was about being a war hawk and whether or not the same people who push war would be able to do what our young men and women do on that line themselves. i think it's pretty. it was pretty clear to me. yeah, well, it's pretty clear to me that he wasn't calling for the killing of liz cheney. i mean, he's making the same argument that the left made about the right

in the iraq war. i think between 2002 and 2008, when they were saying, you people are sending troops into harm's way, but very few of you served in the military, and it would be totally different if you had to serve in the military. i mean, the left said that about the right for years. and yet, you know, you've got liz cheney. and i have to tell you, i mean, here's a woman whose family is benefited off of war. they profit from war. i mean, when dick cheney became the hell of the head of halliburton, he took it from, i think, the 73rd biggest oil company defense contractor in the world to the 18th biggest. liz cheney goes from when she's in congress, from 7 million. six years later, she's got 47 million. okay. these are people who make money off of military confrontations. and for the left to turn this into something that it is not is not surprising because they've got nothing else. i mean, you got

joe biden calling us garbage and on and on, and we've only got four days left. we've got four more days for them to keep doing this to us. but donald trump is saying, i don't want to send people to war. he backed it up by leaving the world at peace, by leaving the middle east with the abraham accords, and not sending our men and women in a place where they're getting their legs blown off. et cetera. and good for him. yeah. jessica, it's interesting because the argument that jeanine just made is exactly i mean, i remember covering that period. that's exactly the argument that was made against the bush white house. and constant comparing, you know, his halibut, his halliburton connections from years prior. this is a war hawk. so now you have president trump calling her a war hawk in this moment. and everybody's just saying that he's a crazy person who wants to go shoot someone. and losing the whole rest of that story. yeah. as usual, the people who have to or want to defend donald trump do a better job of doing it than donald trump himself. so i

think the chickenhawk argument is a pretty strong one. i think a lot of people warmonger or say, we should just go in there, we'll take care of it. and they're not sending their sons or daughters. they're not the ones that are going to serve themselves. but using that kind of rhetoric, saying, let's put her with a rifle standing there with nine barrels shooting at her, let's see how she feels about it. you know, when the guns are trained on her face conjures up something in you. it's the same thing as the comments he made two nights ago about protecting women. he's talking about protecting them from illegal alien crime. but he says, i'll protect women whether they like it or not. and he even admits on stage that his team wants him to stop talking like that. and nikki haley was making this case with bret baier on special report early in the week, where she said the rhetoric is too bro tastic. this is too masculine of a campaign, and you see that in the gender divide, and it's what's bearing out in the election right now. i'm sure you've seen david plouffe talking about this. the

harris campaign has put it out there to all the reporters today that what they're seeing from the late breakers. so people are deciding in the last week is a double digit surge for kamala's campaign. and people are saying that the madison square garden rally was the last straw. and when you have a lineup that includes dana white, hulk hogan, elon musk, rfk jr and tony hinchcliffe with, you know, the clincher there that has erupted, the puerto rican community and the latino community writ large against the trump campaign, saying, i get it. he's a comedian, right? i don't blame tony hinchcliffe for that. he has a right to say it. i don't think it was the right venue for it. if you want your candidate to win the election, but for them to take that and say, this is what people that he showcases thinks about, people like us, you watch bad bunny's videos about it. i'm actually surprised by the level of explosiveness that this has caused. you can't then sit there and defend this or

say it's about being out of context. people are telling you, we know who donald trump is, and he's someone who says things like, you know how many? it's almost why you call him a nazi. i don't call him a nazi. no, but you're defending people who do. just now, right? that's the problem. you know what's interesting to me as always, somehow the rhetoric is worse than the deeds behind it. so it's not when trump says, i want to protect women from illegal violent offenders, it's not like i'm upset about the illegal violent offenders. i'm upset over the rhetoric he used or a million are dead in the ukraine-russian war because we're funding it. companies like halliburton, right? no, that's not the thing. that's outrageous. it's the rhetoric trump uses when he refers to war pigs, because that's what they are. to quote the great ozzy osbourne. it's not until trump uses the inflammatory language that democrats suddenly decide or discover actually, that there's an issue

behind it. do you think the democrats had any idea that there was a trash crisis in puerto rico until a roast comic made a joke about it? hell no. do you think all of these guys wringing their hands, he's famous. puerto ricans are doing anything but posting on twitter. are they doing anything to solve the trash crisis? no, they're not, they're not. and you can bet trump probably will. he might say something, but he will do something. the liz cheney hoax is predicated on your side thinking your voters are stupid and lazy, that you assume they will accept an out of context quote and not look behind for the entire thought process. so liz isn't just a liar and a cheat. she's also playing along. she's well, she's a she's a fabricator. the media plays along with it because you know what? this is their side. this is why the mainstream media is dead. it's gone. you

can you know what? you can put a nail in this coffin. it ain't coming back after 2024. it's why liz cheney, it's why harris. it's why waltz, who just called elon musk gay. you probably didn't hear that from the media, did you? but you heard it here. that's why they can't do podcasts. they can only survive in two minute bursts on cnn and msnbc, because if they were in a situation where somebody asked a follow up question or showed the clip in entirety, they'd be humiliated for the posters. they are. this is how you perpetuated the fine people hoax, the bloodbath lie, the drinking bleach again. it's time to put a coffin, a nail in the coffin of mainstream media. you know, jesse, it strikes me that. and i got a few messages after this. liz cheney blow up from families whose sons and daughters have served in the military. and i think that the trump campaign has been actually masterful at finding the other side of these issues.

and i think that issue this back and forth, you're going to have a lot of military families across this country who live in you know, all over the country and in swing states, obviously, who are going to look at that and say, yes, you know what? i'm not sure she would be on the line, but my child is on the line. he's in michigan right now where there's a lot of muslims, and he's campaigning with a lot of muslims who are watching the democrats defend and campaign with liz cheney in the final stretch, and people in dearborn, they're not super upset about what donald trump said about liz cheney. i don't know why the democrats are defending liz cheney and campaigning with liz cheney in the final stretch of this election. it makes no sense to me. 20 years ago, you said the exact same thing about the cheneys as trump just said. and if you're going to call the guy hitler for a year, who cares what he says about anything

he's allowed to say whatever he wants. now the president can say risque things. at least he says something. the other person says dumb things. i'd rather have someone that says risque, controversial things than someone who says dumb things. she says dumb things or she says nothing at all, and everybody understands that. and if you just look at the record, he was a peace candidate. he is the peace candidate. he never used the military against anybody. he never locked anybody up like the democrats did. and there was no new war started under his watch. so i think the proof is in the pudding. i don't know where that came from. yeah, but the proof is there. yeah. can i just say one more thing? you know, it was joe biden who called to put donald trump in the bull's eye just days before donald trump was shot. did you see that in the headline? you never saw that headline. okay, he has a fundraiser. why can't you cannot you know what? you can't deny that joe biden said to put donald trump in the

bull's eye. and two days later, he was shot in the head. by the way, you know what? if, you know, maybe they should just suggest liz cheney go hunting with her dad. i knew that was going to come up in some way. all right. so straight ahead, kamala harris closing message this week taking another hit a lackluster jobs report today. there was all this talk that the three big economic reports this week were going to be gangbusters. and a big closing for democrats. it's not what happened when we come back. oh, thunder road, sit tight. take hold. thunder road. whoa i got this good customize and save with liberty mutual customize and save. and then i wake up is lemieux with you in all your dreams? oh, yeah. only pay for what you need. liberty, liberty, liberty, liberty. mom, sometimes you just need a moment. self-care has never

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issue than the economy and the harris campaign can't be happy to be closing with the worst jobs report in four years. u.s. employers just added a measly 12,000 jobs in october. and this isn't very reassuring. harris is once again acting totally clueless on what her first executive action would be. day one what's your first executive action? well, my first priority, which will be probably the package of bills, is about bringing down the cost of living. donald trump wasting no time explaining how he will fix kamala's poor economy on day one, i will sign an executive order directing every federal agency to immediately remove every single burdensome regulation driving up the cost of goods. i will create a new cabinet position for a senior member of my administration, who will be tasked exclusively with doing everything in the

federal government's power to reduce the cost of living. jessica, i thought that kamala really thought that biden nomics was working, and when i saw the 12 000 jobs i thought must be for a county or maybe a state, but it's for the whole country. yeah, no, it was definitely disappointing in comparison, actually, to the gangbusters reports that we've been having. and there were some big strikes, like at boeing and the impacts of the hurricanes is what economists are saying largely contributed to this, but they certainly have a good economic record to run on. and they have been, which is why she has completely decimated his lead on the economy. i don't know if you guys saw the new marist polls across the blue wall states, which are the keys to the kingdom for the democrats, but trump only has a lead of one point, i believe, in michigan and two points in wisconsin or or in pennsylvania. it is, i think, a little bit 3 or 4 points in wisconsin and that's because she is messaging on this nonstop, and donald trump is messaging on anti-trans

issues. and that ad that shows during the football, i get it. that is a good ad that says she's for they them and donald trump is for you. but if you are running in a general election and it's the economy stupid and has been the entire time, why are you talking about trans issues as your number one issue? the other thing that keeps sticking out to me as very strange, and maybe someone has the answer is why are there so many reports of missing ground game on the part of the republicans out of parts of arizona, out of parts of michigan, in pennsylvania, the democrats have knocked on 13 million doors across the battleground states, and in october alone made 100 million phone calls from their phone banking. you don't hear that? and then you see, like charlie kirk losing his mind during one of his telecasts or youtube casts, i don't know what the right term of it is. and he says, what is going on? all these women are voting on top

of it. i think the early vote has been 54% female on top of it, but where's the game? i thought charlie kirk was going to be delivering that. well, what you didn't know? jessica? i may have maybe knocked on 13 million doors, but 12 million people shut them in your face. that's really not true. have you seen the footage of the conversations? have you seen the ring camera footage? jessica. kaboom. kaboom. kaboom. you're throwing a lot of stuff out here. no one cares about marist. marist was dead wrong in the last election, and i bet they will again. are you kidding me? big village or the guy asking this woman, what is your first thing you're going to do on the job? executive action. and she can't name it. she can't even name it. she's talking about what she's going to do in congress. when biden got in, i remember that video. they have about 16 stacks of things he was signing. they just handed it to him. he didn't even know what he was signing. one of them, i remember, was tearing up trump's border policies. that was a good one. and the other one was about equity. so she should know what your priority is on day one, because actuall,

day one is right now because she still has the power to do whatever she wants. i haven't heard her talk about the economy at all. maybe because i don't live in michigan or pennsylvania or wisconsin, but if i were kamala harris and we watch her speeches, she never talks about bidenomics. she never talks about all these great things that they did in the last four years. and she doesn't talk about what she's going to do in the next four years. she just talks about being a middle class person and how donald trump's a fascist. you know, martha, she says that she's going to attack the economy and make it better in the first day. except the last answer i heard when they asked her how she was going to do it, she started with the middle class nonsense. but, you know, i you really want a president who is caring and empathic and has a heart. she's sending a message that she is uncaring, that she's going to make you wait. the fact that you are living paycheck to paycheck, she's not going to do anything

for you until day one, so you can suffer. and if you elect her, then she'll do something for you. what do you think of that? well, i think i think it's really difficult for her that she, you know, she was standing out in front of the white house the other night, and she does own the record of the last three years. one of the things that keeps striking me are these downward revisions. they're crazy. i mean, you had in august $800,000. i mean, what kind of agency can you imagine how much we're paying for that agency to come up with these numbers that they then corrected by 800,000? look, at august, they revised down 81,000. september down 31,000. so the jobs that people thought were on the books were not. and that's the answer to the question, why do people say they don't feel like things are getting better? and the administration and the harris campaign keep telling them that, oh, actually, things are going really well for you. and they say, i remember some guy on a boardwalk was asked this question. he laughed. he said, don't tell me how i'm experiencing my own life and what i have to pay for things.

prices are up 20%, but obviously the cost of living issue is something that's polling. importantly, they're both using that phrase. trump and harris in these final days. but the difference is that harris is talking about what she's going to give you $25,000 for this, $5,000 for that. now, that's that can be very persuasive with a lot of voters. trump is saying, i'm going to slice and dice regulations from the book. that's going to help businesses to thrive. they're going to hire people and your wages are going to go up, which is what happened the last time around. so they have both experiences to compare. one is i'm going to give you some money. the other is i'm going to stimulate the economy. we'll see who wins out. but greg, in addition to that, people remember the trump years as being better than these last four years. economically. true, true. as for the democrats ground game, their ground game is just getting the dead to vote. the only jobs that the dems have created are those people who make the yellow tape that goes around crime scenes and perhaps male nannies, because i think young moms see doug emhoff and go, i'm not taking the risk. so

that may account for the 10,000 votes, the 10,000 jobs, which is going to be really hard to downgrade from 10,000. it has been a good record, an economy for rich liberals, you know, why did bill have to make the argument that a bad economy under biden and kamala is not a good reason to vote for trump? why did he do that? maybe because he's right for him, for clooney, for springsteen, for j.lo, for kimmel. when you're rich and famous, bad economies are never a problem. you already spent 100 grand on a private jet to europe, 100 bucks for breakfast at four seasons. all the things that matter to the voter cost of living, crime, illegal immigration has no effect whatsoever on the people who wish you would ignore those issues. they could. after the election, they can go back to their secure estate, but you're screwed. i can actually refute that. it's more than $100 per person at the four seasons. really. it's at least 120.

yeah. thank you for adding that. all right. coming up over here, elon musk's mom is ditching the democrats. are yo. come on baby, just pump it. pump it pump it pump it pump it. now there are many ways to do things at old dominion freight line. we do them this way. this way has people who start early, people who care and inspire each other to do things the way they should be done this way uses technology and goes the extra mile to deliver your promises on time every time. this way is why we're the number one national ltl carrier for quality for us, this way is the right way, which is why it's the only way we go. so how did you two meet? actually, it's a pretty funny story. is he taken? it's all yours. we met and separated. oh, no. and again, it's you.

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is so confident that relaxing sleep will work for you. he's asked us to give away another 1000 bottles. get your free bottle of relaxation. sleep no. i'm gonna love me again. check in on my very best friend. no one's going to happen here. elon musk certainly making waves this election season, but his mom, maye musk, also making headlines after revealing what caused her to ditch the democrats. watch this. when i became a us citizen, of course, i was democratic because i had the good, kind people who care about america. and then i saw i would watch cnn and msnbc and read the new york times and oh, wow, the republicans are terrible. but then they'd also

say, elon is terrible. and i'm thinking, why are they why are they lying about elon? when i resigned from the democrats, i just felt such a relief that i'm not part of the party. that's now malicious and dishonest. usually, greg, you have when you get older, as you would know, people become more conservative. you don't usually that's what this is. yes. that's what this that's what this is. no, i think you got it backwards. i have it backwards. i think reverse. do you reverse musk's mom didn't ditch the democrats any more than elon musk ditched the democrats. the democrats ditched them. that's what i said. the same way they ditched tulsi gabbard, rfk, bill ackman, all these other prominent independent democrats. if you just stand still and the vessel you're in is sliding left and further left, it's a lie to say no, it's you who moved. that's what makes a lot of these people so deeply angry and offended. how can you be in a party that pushes drugs and surgery on children who are incapable of

understanding how long life really is? how can you be in a party that puts the rights of criminals before victims? this is not, you know, democrat or liberal. it's insanity. in the old days, you could be a democrat because we never politicized crime. we all knew what law and order was. we didn't we didn't politicize biology. we knew what a girl and a boy was. we didn't criminal. we didn't politicize the border. we knew what a secure one is. we could all agree on these things. but even when vance was on rogan, he pointed out how now even censorship is a virtue among the left, disguising it as the fight against disinformation. this is something that old school liberals, it turns their stomach. think about the trans surgery for kids. think for a moment, okay? it's finally turning the tide. it's getting exposed. it's being banned in a lot of states. but i've been talking about this for what, four years? i was called transphobic. i was accused of hate speech, disinformation. and that was all in an effort to shut down conversation and

who was doing that? the left. that's right. and if they had succeeded, there'd be a lot of butchered kids. you're welcome kids, you're welcome. judge jeanine, stand up for the kids. greg. yes, i am standing. you know. you know, maye musk. and by the way, she's stunning. i mean, i saw her walking through the green room. i mean, you just want to talk to her. but she had the benefit of what? most americans don't have the benefit of. she knew that once cnn and msnbc started lying about her son, she knew that's that's a that's a straight out lie. a lot of americans, you know, don't see it as objectively like, you know, the democrats are so good their party, they care about everybody. and i know when i used to swear in newly elected, newly naturalized citizens, it was always the democrats who were bringing him in. the democrats were lining them up and getting them to sign up in a political party. and so, you

know, it's going to take a lot for people to kind of get away from that. the democrats really don't care about you. they only care about, you know, illegals getting into this country, affecting your budget, your city, your education. and they don't really care about law and order. they want criminals out there, and they're not going to do anything to keep them in. and they're going to keep electing progressive d.a.s. but when you talk about jd vance on joe rogan, one of the things that that tim walz said that j.d. vance was talking about, he said, tim walz is so uninformed, he actually said there's no guarantee to free speech on misinformation or hate speech. tim walz, you're stupid. you don't know the constitution. you don't know what the law is in this country. it is protected speech under the first amendment. don't be so hard on that gay guy, but see what happens. you know, he's happy, greg. yes. he's that well, if let's see if let's see how the media reacts to that versus walt saying that

about musk. exactly. and you know, the difference between maye musk and ann watters when the media lies about me, my mom believes the media. no. but you know what? you know what the judge is talking about. it's called the gelman effect. it's when you trust the media most of the time until you get to a story that you know about, like your son watched your eyes and you go, holy crap, you know? but i think what she's talking about is something we're going to be watching really closely on election night, which is whether or not there is a true realignment happening in the country and whether or not the diverse party is becoming the republican party with lots of hispanic and black voters. and whether or not the democrat party has become the party that is in favor of war. and, you know, you can look at it any way you want. but the other thing about censorship, when i heard kamala harris, the vice president, say that that comment that that trump made should be disqualifying, i was like, wait, is that how that works? you get disqualified from running for something that you said in a free speech country? i think all these

calls for, oh, that should absolutely disqualify him. they said on the view, i understand it, but when the vice president said it, i was a little surprised. but before we get to jessica, this is oh my gosh, your pen. okay i love that. look at this thing. this is a jewel encrusted royal pen the size of prince harry's balls in the uk. kim rosenberg. kimmy. kimmy. kimmy. what a pen. jessica. like a scepter. i could just say something to you. put a spell on me. yeah. i love the pen. so i really think that the democrats made a big mistake shunning elon musk, who believes more in the same things that we do than the republican party. i mean, this is someone who believes in climate change as an existential threat and is kind of the father of the ev is here, someone who is fundamentally pro-choice. you know, all these reasons and i

think that elon musk needed arms opened to him and to have more conversations about the positive contributions, like starlink, which is absolutely incredible. saving people everywhere from north carolina to ukraine to estonia. and i don't think that twitter would be the way that it is now if we had been more embracing, and he certainly wouldn't be a top surrogate for donald trump if we had done that. too bad you embrace diddy. big mistake. jessica, don't do that. we no one is embracing everybody that's coming out now for kamala are somehow also being outed at diddy parties. coincidence, right. it's a coincidence. it just happens to be a coincidence. taylor swift was like four. she was at a diddy party. no, but now you've got a headline. yeah, we got to go, though. let's go to a fun segment ahead. celebrities know what's best for you and your family. hollywood avengers are assembling for kamala and the circle of life. is the wheel of

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mom has got it going on. she's all i want and i've waited for so long. welcome back. avengers assemble for kamala. the cast of marvel's blockbuster, reuniting this week in support of the vice president. hi. you guys. hi, avengers. hey. hey, scarlet. jumping on the call. whoa whoa whoa. i think you mean assembling. i said assembling. that's pretty good. no, they thought it was funny. all right, who wants to make fun of them first? greg. yes. this is a great contrast between the real and the imaginary. you have fictional avengers paid actors siding with harris. then you have real avengers siding with trump, musk, rfk. vivek. tulsi vance, a murderer's row of badasses. harris has the guy who plays tony stark. trump has the real tony stark. as in elon musk. so

you can have your imposters because they're not real. jesse, because it's friday, i feel like maybe you'll be more honest if there was brutally honest. are you ready for this? if they came out and endorsed trump, i'd say this is great. great. this is going to move voters. but now they're doing it with kamala. so i'm just going to blow it off. all right. you want to do the same for taylor swift that she doesn't matter. what makes actors think we even give a about what? the fact that you trot them out if you have them, but you don't have them. you know, what did it do hillary clinton any good? come on. okay. it's weird that they're saying they come up with this slogan and they say, down with democracy. and in the beginning they say, you know, it's kamala harris. i'm down with democracy. but then they start dropping the i'm. and then they're all saying, down with democracy. you guys don't understand what i just said. the republicans have the actual avengers. these are just the impostors. come on people. we have the pirate ship. we have

the pirate ship. you have the goody two shoes lollipop brigade. yeah, we literally have everybody. and if we lose, it'll be x wannabe. okay, fan mail friday is up next. you are everything. everything that i wanted. we were meant to be supposed to be. but we lost it. look out. cause here i come. have you always had trouble losing weight and keeping it off? same. discover the power of wegovy and are marching on to the beat i drove with wegovy. i lost 35 pounds and some lost over 46 pounds. we go the and i'm keeping the weight off wegovy helps you lose weight and keep it off. i'm reducing my risk. wegovy is the only fda approved weight management medicine that's proven to reduce risk of major cardiovascular events in adults with known heart disease, and with either obesity or

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you can save. there are auctions going on right now, so what are you waiting for? all women are bad. all women are bad. all women are bad. that's what he said. oh, we're not all bad. mark cuban is a cramps fan. i had to do that fan mail friday. this is a great question because i thought about this as a kid. a lot. what first name would you have picked for yourself, mike, you wanted to be a mike? i wanted to be a mike. michael jordan, michael tyson, mike jackson, michael myers. thanks, greg. yeah, i wanted to be mike judge. mel, your first name is judge mel. mel. mel. judge jeanine. judge jeanine. shut up. mel. why? mel. because i like it. it is a good name for a chick. melanie. mel. a good name for a chick. mel. mel. me. mel. mel. pirro. jessica. no. mel farris, that's my name. mel. practice. farris. oh, that

was good. so good. jessica. so i was supposed to be named. they knew i was a girl, but i was supposed to be named teddy. and my dad chickened out at the last minute. and so that's why i named my daughter teddy tarlov. your name should have been boris. boris karloff, a great actor. and who's to say it's not gender neutral? martha, are you suggesting that i wouldn't want to be named martha? that is a classic. that is a classic. when i was a child, i actually love my name now, but i would be like, hi, i'm. i'm suzanne. no, hi. i'm jennifer. hi. i'm anything but martha. no, i did not like it when i was a kid. you were. but you were like an old lady name. yeah, but you were when you were. it got into your teenage and older years. you were a very probably cute girl. so it was never a marty, you know? marty. martha. martha. martha. martha. pam. remember? martha. martha. martha. you didn't give me another name. mem mem mem mem mem. martha. you didn't give us the name. what name

would you have preferred? jennifer. susan. any one of the ones i said i was always like i wanted. i, i wanted to be dack like dack rambo like dak prescott. yeah. just the name dak. any kind of sweet or stig. stig. stig. yeah. like a really raw name. greg. there's not a lot of famous greg's. yeah. you know greg morris. greg evigan, greg brady, greg brady. yeah, but that's a character. martha. get with it. is. what's wrong with her? all right. what do you have to buy? even though you have many of them? i'll go to you, martha. what do i have to buy? even though i have many of them? oh, shoes are typical cliched answer from a female. i should be surrounded by smarter women. oh, jesse, please, greg, we will protect these women, whether they like it or not, whether we like it or not. oh. feeling good? feeling. i feel so much safer now, don't you? yeah, totally. there are fine people on both sides of you, jesse. oh, man. are you

drinking bleach again? jessica? i injected it straight in because he told me to. yeah. toilet paper. i'm an obsessive toilet paper. yes, yes. yeah. like, i have, like, a store. we have great storage, especially for a city apartment. and it can be, like, filled with toilet paper. and i would still buy. i dream about toilet paper. it's so good. yeah. when you have a you can never have enough. nope, nope. not at all. judge. what do you think? shoes, bags? jewelry? bags, bags? chocolate? jewelry. oh, jewelry. yeah, jewelry. did we ask you yet? jesse? electric bentleys are nice. collection in the garage. you just can't have enough. you just keep buying more. yeah. greg. let's see records. yeah, i do buy a lot of records. and then i listen to them once, and then i forget that i bought them. i bought records twice by accident. the same one. me too. very sad story. do you know that i met a girl once that

collected scissors? she had 400 scissors. that's so scary. yeah, she was obsessed with it, like suzy scissorhands. she came to the bar and she had two brand new scissors in her purse. is weird. yeah. what happened to her? she is now running for president kamala harris. one more thing is up next. i'm not kidding. fish heads, fish heads, roly poly fish heads. fish heads. fish heads. eat them up. yum. in the morning laughing. if you have heart failure, vasica can help you keep living life with the ones you love. ask your doctor about vasica today. pozega can cause serious side effects, including ketoacidosis that may be fatal. dehydration, urinary tract or genital yeast infections, and low blood sugar. a rare, life threatening bacterial infection in the skin of the perineum could occur. stop taking vasica and call your doctor right away if you have symptoms of this infection, an allergic reaction or ketoacidosis, please. we're society in crisis. but what if

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kat. timpf. todd. piro. charlie arnold, and tyrus. that's tonight at ten. also, my gutfeld 2025 tour is now open for ticket sales. look where i'm at. they're on sale. go to gutfeld.com for tickets. that's a very, very good looking shot of me, don't you think? do i look like a fascist there? i look like a fascist. hey, let's do this. say, nazi. yeah, i knew you were. it does look like a neo nazi. all right. you wouldn't believe. take a look at this. you wouldn't believe that was. that is in wellington, new zealand. jeffrey toobin finally going out for a walk. it's so good to see him. he's on top of a large building and it's going to be he's going to be moving to australia. the sculpture is named quasi after quasimoto, 16ft tall, has been in wellington, new zealand, since 2019. interesting. is it really martha? no. i'm like, what is that? not really. everyone's all making faces. like, what is he talking about? take a look at this punk and dunk at the portland zoo. rescued sea otters. lincoln, juneau and

sushi showed off their hoop skills last week in their enclosure by playing a friendly game of basketball with mini pumpkins. talk about a bunch of michael gordon's get it? jordan. gordon. thank you. jesse. all right. national authors day just happens to be that day. so in honor get it together. how i saved the world. you could get two with the click of one thumb. you click. i don't need the money. it's just that we didn't have any other options for one more thing. i bet biden think of any other books that you liked. biden. stop it. martha. biden eats award at ceremony tonight at 8:00. is it a baby award? it's really cute. that was last night. oh, yeah. that was interesting. okay. jessica. all right. congratulations to my great friends, alyssa and greg on the birth of their baby boy, cameron alexander. born on halloween, weighing 7 pounds, 12oz. also, hello to patti and

ken link, alyssa's parents, who are very excited about their grandson, but also huge five watchers. and speaking of babies, i've got more. not another bun in my oven, but a traffic stop in utica, michigan became a police escort once the officer saw the speeding driver's wife was in labor. austin sadowski rushing his wife, mary wertz, to the hospital when they were pulled over. the officer quickly understood the situation, transitioned to an emergency escort after they got to the hospital safely. austin hilariously still offered the officer his license while his wife was inside. she declined, and baby henry was born a couple days later. can you tell us more about this? sorry. one more things. no, that was two. no i didn't, i said, there's no time for mine. which was a really good myna bird. but you can look it up. oh, congratulations to your cute family. very cute family. friends. that is it for this story. but we're here all weekend, folks. we'll see you on sunday. have a great night