new york at new jersey, long island. tickets are on sale, it is december fifth, thursday night, it will stream live on fox nation starting at 8:00 p.m. eastern. tickets are on sale. you can buy them. foxnation.com/patriot awards. i hope you will come r it will be such an inspiring night, beyond your imagination. thank you for being with us, unfortunately that's all the time we have this evening. please set your dvr so you never miss an episode of hannity, news anytime, all the time, check us out online. and in the meantime, let not your heart be troubled, greg gutfeld standing by, he will put a smile on your face. have a great weekend, a lot to be thankful for. ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪

[cheering and applause] >> greg: i know! i know. [cheering and applause] >> greg: i guess i can stay. it's friday, so you know what that means, let's welcome tonight's guest. fresh from falling asleep in a tanning bed, greg walters! she is a sports diva who got straight as, sports reporter emily austin. her favorite pregnancy book is rosemary's baby. best-selling author, kat timpf. he's fearless and gigantic and makes ladies over 60 feel romantic.

best-selling author, comedian and performer, it's tyrus! before we get to some new stories, let's do this. >> announcer: greg's leftovers! >> greg: its leftovers were read the jokes we didn't use this week and as alway read them so if they suck, joe machi will be nominated as attorney general and forced to deport jerry nadler's pants. thanksgiving is next week which means down in washington, the white house kitchen staff has to hide the gravy boat so joe doesn't in them. meanwhile, nancy pelosi is preparing for thanksgiving türkiye after stuffing the bird with breadcrumbs, celery and onion, she gives it to shots of botox and then stabs it in the back. [applause] >> greg: yeah! the transportation secretary said the are expecting record-breaking thanksgiving travel this year. to speed up the lines and

security, you will never guess who has offered to help pat down travelers. [laughter] [applause] >> greg: james carville attacked merrick garland for not rushing to prosecute trump. then he attacked a mongoose that was trying to steal his bowl of mice. [laughter] >> greg: 41% of democrats want kamala harris to run again in 2028. rouse-mac the other 59% preferred this guy. [laughter] amid financial woes, msnbc will cut rachel salary. she is so downward out she had to replace the silver bowl she uses with a plastic one to cut her own hair.

as woke dies off, aoc removed her pronouns from her twitter bio and changed representative to congresswoman. at this rate, and two weeks she will be calling herself puts. what's up to its? we've got to bring that back. snow in new york city last night to melt it, mayor eric adams is encouraging people to start. new research shows that ai can recreate your personality simply by interviewing you for two hours which may then live on after you die. this is why 5 out of 5 scientists warned the world never to interview joy. [applause] double laugh!

the world's saddest dolphin was reported talking to himself because he has no friends. they call this brian disorder. the world's tallest and the world's shortest woman appeared at a guinness world record event. which is surprising they made it there since they are both terrible drivers. [laughter] they claim trump will use the u.s. military against them but trump says he is only asking the army corps of engineers to help adam build a chin. al sharpton blasted president trump for not adding any black people to his cabinet yet. or maybe he did and they are just running late.

that's why they are called leftovers, tyrus. >> who wrote that? >> greg: probably racist mackey. ufc head dana white called politics a disgusting business. then he got back to paying people to beat the out of each other. kim kardashian shared photos of herself holding hands with her tesla robot. she says it is nothing serious, she just likes being with someone who has fewer fake parts. a 33-year-old man returning from mexico was found to have 4.2 ounces of fentanyl in his rectum remind me to avoid fentanyl. finally, denmark is announced plans to immelman the world's first tax on cow. it is a move that is causing

panic in the bovine community. [cheering and applause] you people! all right, these days, msnbc has come to stand for must sell network before christmas. their postelection ratings are down 54 percent, that is 50% more than my body fat, walter.ue more viewers. and so they have slashed their budgets so low, joy reid had to replace her to pay with a cocktail napkin. but don't feel bad. check out this headline that their website dropped today. quote, lake and riley's never stood a chance. now that can't be an accident. if you ask me, it is suicide by headline.

what better way to kill off the rest of the network than to drop one of the most repulsive headlines of all time. msnbc did finally change it but the damage was already done. and the same can be said for their shows. mika and joe were circling the drain with morning joe's already low ratings of dropping another 15%. they are losing people as fast as the view loses toes. the public wants scarborough's opinions about as much as his music. ♪ ♪ he's right, it's not easy when you suck. and it sure doesn't help that overnight they have gone from calling trump hitler to rolling over on their backs for a belly rub. seriously, mike tyson put up more of a fight.

but she says that no one's really mad at her, they're all just scared of trump's retribution. >> i have been surprised at the backlash. and the way i look at it is that people are very scared. it's one of the reasons we went in here is because people are very scared about donald trump's comments at political adversaries. a lot of people are scared because of what has happened. everyone is so scared, people, weather they are in the media for they are citizens of this great country, i think everybody is feeling scared, disoriented, fearful of the future. and i think -- i think just for a quick moment, i may be the punching bag for that. >> greg: no, you're not a punching bag. a punching bag is not hollow. [applause]

>> greg: but everybody is scared, they're scared, they're scared! she made sure everyone knew that, yes people were frightened. but who made them so scared? you, you [bleep]. you convinced your audience that trump wanted to destroy democracy and kill women. even randi weingarten is hysterical and he is no shrinking violet. if you really believe the stuff you actually said, you'd be fleeing the country, not groveling on mar-a-lago. the fact is your viewers revile you because your motivations were exposed. the fearmongering was strictly business. and other your job is in jeopardy, the fearmongering has gone away. you went telling them trump is evil to that trump is not so bad. is like your spouse telling you how much she hates her boss before running off with him to jamaica. meanwhile, a salary has been

slashed by $5 million a year. it sounds like a lot except she was making $30 million a year. for one show a week. so if she does 50 shows a year, her pay went from 600,000 in episode 2,500,000. that is like five dollars per viewer. but one msnbc executive justifies it, calling maddow, ratings of viagra. i'm sorry, she couldn't even give chris matthews a semi. and he's a horny little devil! so what's next for msnbc? they will try to redefine themselves as a start up. but that is impossible because the product is nothing new and it is hopelessly contaminated.

it is radioactive. it's like closing chornobyl, throwing on a coat of paint and reopening it is a glow-in-the-dark cracker barrel. be sure to check out the petting zoo for animals with eight legs! but they are hoping that there viewers are so addicted to lyse that they will come back. please come back, msnbc will say to their betrayed lovers. i promise i will do better. you need me. and they probably will go back, there's always a market for terrible ideas. even when the mocha smoothie they are being served is actually full of [bleep]. >> announcer: p! [cheering and applause] i think, walter, the best way to describe the state in the future of the media was an msnbc headline, laken rielly never stood a chance, that wasn't just written, it was approved.

what kind of mind-set is that? >> first of all, besides being horrific, it is incorrect. laken reilly's killer did have a chance, it was given to him by the u.s. government when he got here. all he had to do was not murder a woman. but he blew that chance. but they would run this and then correct it. it's ridiculous. they must have known it needed correction before they ran it. was it just on attempt to throw a grenade into our minds? it feels like terrorism, almost. a form of news terrorism. what are they going to say next? i don't know, putin, a gentle man who was underestimated? >> and we all know, to, as people who are writers, that you don't write the headline yourself. so some editor wrote that, probably. completely [bleep] over the

person who wrote that article. imagine being the person who wrote that. spending all the time on the article and then you look online and they're like, that's what you called my article? i mean, i really want to know who wrote it. because very rarely, if ever it is the person who wrote the article. i want to know who wrote that headline and then who approve the headline. because it is impossible for me to look at that man and feel anything but absolute disgust, hatred, vitriol. i don't know how the family can stand to be in the courtroom with the guy. i don't know how you can even stand it. but there is probably some drama going on in the building over the person that wrote the article and then the person that wrote the headline. >> greg: i think it is the last thing msnbc needed unless they thought it doesn't matter anymore. like who [bleep] cares. >> a click baited american citizen who was murdered brutally, she's clickbait. they clicked that because they will say what is that? so again, they still don't care. there thinking they are one

click away from being back in the game. that's why they would not have the guts to outright fire maddow for decades of telling us about russia and this and that and lies upon lies upon lies. they still think there is a way they can pull it out. just like mika talking about people are afraid. can anyone tell me at any term or any moment in your life when things are going awry and why your family is afraid, someone in your family said, we need to find out what joe and mika would do. what, someone called joe and mika! it never happened. the only people who are afraid was joe saying, say were afraid. they couldn't get airtime on their own show for that whack message. >> greg: it's true! [applause] and that bit, mika mentioned that people are scared, people are scared. without connecting the fact that they are the people that are projecting the fear. it's insane.

>> she repeated the same word so many times, if she was any less articulate i would have thought that was kamala harris. but she made too much sense. [cheering and applause] i think to go off of walter's point, you were asking do they not care, did they not think? i feel as if they lost any ounce of self independent thinking, whatsoever. they don't think about these headlines. to me, they go, okay,, order the republican saying? what did they believe and what do they think? let's choose the exact opposite stance no matter how outrageous it is and let's ride with it because, got for bid, bci to eye with the republicans because then we lose our viewership of self-loathing lonely people at home to agree with us. >> i don't think it's clickbait though. >> they got clickbait when they ran and clickbait when they brought it down. but they need ratings viagra, they really do. because viagra is for guys who should have died 10 years ago.

>> yes! >> they should have died 10 years ago. it keeps them alive so they can have sex so they can die of a heart attack. >> that's why ask you the night and social media, i said should there be background checks for viagra for men. because there should definitely be a point where it should stop. >> died 10 years ago! [laughter] >> you can have sex one more time very briefly with a horrified partner and then die of a heart attack! >> these are all the evil villains in the world, rag. the creepy old man, it has to stop! take viagra way and they can't play anymore! >> viagra's celebrity endorsement was bob dole. >> and he should have died years ago! >> he has, actually. >> he died of a heart attack, i think. >> greg: we have to move on now. [laughter]

somehow i didn't see that direction. by the way, viagra can treat that as well. [applause] consult your doctor! i'm not a doctor! though i have told women that. in my van. next, ellen is running away and fleeing to the u.k. crazy! customize and save with liberty mutual. customize and sa— (balloon doug pops & deflates) and then i wake up. is limu with you in all your dreams?

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♪ later ellen, see you never ♪ ♪ good luck with that u.k. whether ♪ ♪ injury or cricket, tea and biscuit, bring out your stupid [bleep]. year the issue, nobody will miss you ♪ [cheering and applause] >> greg: mc jean! the arkansas m&m. ellen to generous bales for the u.k. i'll go to you first, because i think you understand the story. ellen and her wife, porsche have

left their millionaire haven for england.r come back in the wake of trut in why she is leaving? >> absolutely not. i mean, ellen got canceled for real a few years ago from just being a jerk. it wasn't like a single comment she said or something she did, just lots of people saying that working for her was a living nightmare and that she is a jerk and i think that's probably why she wants to leave because she hasn't been able to make a comeback. remember everyone loved ellen, ellen we love you, ellen's here, and then that went away so she has probably been thinking of a reason to leave and now she thinks that this is the reason to try to make it looked -- like a great i am, i feel how you feel because of trump. >> greg: it was just in the excuse. emily, i watched her comedy special, it was a huge pd party. she was lamenting how her reputation has suffered. she is essentially as popular as a pit bull with monkeypox but she is putting this on trump.

de think everybody's going going to love her in england? >> especially the jihadi's who love the, shall go over well there. i think she is fleeing for way more than that. >> greg: if trump is truly responsible for ellen's exodus, shouldn't that go down as his greatest achievement in the last -- [cheering and applause] he should get the nobel prize. >> he is going to have a who's who of who's left. the entire 80s music catalog is gone. springsteen, share, madonna. i just don't know why they keep showing pictures of aaron rodgers with blond hair. [laughter] >> i'm still waiting for jimmy kimmel to leave like he promised. >> they are all saying this and i guess in some way, it just proves how out of touch they are with the people that they wanted to convince to believe in them. because your heroes that told you he is hitler are leaving you.

she's not saying, anyone who wants to come with me, come on. no, she was like well, that's my time, later, i'm out. and just leave them behind. >> they don't have the choice, they must stay in the world of trump. we're out of here. by the way, walter, i think we can let the illegal aliens stay if we get enough of hollywood to leave. >> greg: i will take 1000 venezuelan migrants for one share. >> exactly. if you can get one hollywood star to leave, you get to stay otherwise it's out. >> greg: you know it's funny, i will bring this up to, you can comment or not. she left a celebrity base to go to london when she is already ensconced with other celebrities so she is basically still in the same bubble. >> she is not going back to london, she's going to oxford shire and is the only person here who attended oxford university, i can tell you that there is nothing high

british society loves more than a failed and despised american talk show host. >> greg: i have a place to go... >> she will be right there partying with duran duran, what's left of them and she has already been seen at the top gear pub and so on. can you imagine how sad her life is going to be over there? going to be like, i used to be big. first of all, she's going back to the shire. she looks like she's going back to hobbit land to me. >> she will fit right in under the toadstools. >> greg: it's funny, she will not be sitting in a pub elbow to elbow with the plumber. she is already -- she has just moved from one rich place to the other. >> like california will change under trump? >> seriously... >> greg: so who was running the nation until inauguration? [applause]

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>> announcer: a story and five words. [cheering and applause] >> greg: the democrats are completely [bleep]. emily says biden should resign and let kamala harris be present for the last two months because it's a dangerous world and there's extremely high stake decisions in ukraine. so why now? i mean where were you? >> they want to make it as big of a disaster for trump to have to clean up and have the worst first-term ever. but biden stepping down would officially give america the very first in history, make a wish president. that's what it would be for her. however,, selfishly, i would never want that to happen because imagine our first female president ever being single-handedly responsible for world war iii. how hard would that make it for

me to run on my turn? i have to clean up her damage now? >> greg: tire risk, there still is a topic for president , have they not learned? >> listen, who was still answering these calls? >> i have never been polled. >> i think they are counting hang-ups a vote for her. anything that you hear on the phone, that's for her cactus market in there. i think it's more of that. but for them to say that, for him to say that, i think we should take them seriously, we should consider that but then you need to have a special counsel to find out how long everyone is known and everyone involved should have a trip. >> greg: the anti-memory lane. >> it would be great if they said, yeah,, he is unfit now. really? when did this start? and then they would have to go back and all of a sudden, all of

these people, you think nancy pelosi has a sad face now... >> greg: walter, i have to ask you because you are always ahead of the game here. this whole inflammation now, ukraine, russia happening right now, does it remind you of anything? >> yes, covid. everything was going great, rig. i was sitting on your old shows saying after trump's 2020 state of the union, i'd never seen the country this excited, the stock market is high, unemployment is low. the income gap is shrinking and then two weeks later we hear about the chinese virus. that is what world war iii is. a giant buzz kill because people were feeling too good. and by the way, nate silver is the worst pollster in history, why does he keep talking? i think you should resign and be replaced by biden. he said that trump would lose in

2016, he said this last election was too close to call. and he is like a guy who predicts yesterday's weather today and still gets it wrong. [applause] >> greg: cat, you have always wondered who the [bleep] is running the country. clearly not biden. at this point, doesn't make a difference? >> it really doesn't. i would like to see him just go unleashed for a little bit because how bad could it be? i feel like he says stuff and no one really takes it seriously, right? because that's just him saying -- just roll him out there and let him talk. you know what i mean? he's got to have that netflix our. i would watch it. let him say what he wants to say >> greg: a podcast. >> i mean it could be three episodes, but i would watch.

i would watch him to a monolog. i would watch him -- let him answer questions. i feel like not that much damage can be done in three hours because nobody has been taking him seriously anyways. he says stuff and people explain it away and away no one believes and we move on to pretend it never happened. we have been doing that for years now so why don't we just let him out there? wheel another let him have some fun. [cheering and applause] >> we've got to make sure there is subtitles. >> greg: i'm worried about ukraine, i do feel like what walter says, i don't know, i'm just hoping this is all gamesmanship. we just fired a missile -- i don't want to think about it. it's friday. >> great, seriously, this is the worst thing i have ever seen an american president do in my lifetime. take their own rejection by america, rejection of congress, senate and use it to start world war iii.

this guy and the democratic party should never recover from this. >> greg: well said. all right! can your personality be stolen by virtual reality? [cheering and applause]

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>> announcer: should we be concerned? >> greg: tonight on should we be concerned, researchers reveal ai can recreate your personality after just a two hour interview

with you and then that personality can live long after you die. tire risk, you have a lot of kids. would this be great for your children to get advice from you long after your going? >> they wouldn't listen to me if they didn't have to. the whole point of this -- the accoutrement which makes tyrus what he is is the fact that he is the size of an average gorilla so you will listen to his words of advice. you take that away, i'm just like little brian, no one cares what i say. you know what i'm saying? and i'm not sitting for two hours talking to anybody about myself. i would commit murder. when i go, we are all going together. so listen to me while i was here because then if i allow this to happen, all my threats to my kids of like when i'm gone, you will know what i'm talking about. and let's say i'm wrong. i don't need them going online going what's this, dad? told you, growth. stuck in a little glass thing

and why still judging me, no, i'm gone. >> greg: okay,, i have this theory. you know how social media alters behavior and a negative way? people are overdramatic and extreme on instagram, twitter, tik tok. but if you knew that they were going to create the next real you based on all that information, would you try to be as authentic as you can? a better version of yourself now, knowing that that is the only version that will be available. so it actually may act as a guard rail against being a bad person if you know it is being downloaded. >> that was complicated! >> greg: think about doing this show. if you sat here in the show and you go you know what, if i am not my authentic self, in the future this will not be me, so if i am my authentic self -- i

should be exactly who i am now because this will be used as source material for future cat. >> this feels like inception. >> but when it comes to social media, i also feel like the dopamine rush from likes is very powerful. there's so much stuff on there were you like and you're like, why? why did you feel the need to share this with me? [laughter] some of it -- but it's also like your personality, they say after a couple hours, i don't believe that. because i can be a different person sometimes from a few hours and then i wake up the next day and i'm a different girl. 's. >> greg: that's why think when this gets better, they are already doing billions of medical files, they could take the thousand shows you've done on gutfeld, download it and then come up with it without ever interviewing you. >> but then there is me when i wake up on an airplane. and then there is me when i have a week off.

and then there is me when i haven't had something to eat. me when i ate too much and someone let me that much. there is a lot. there's a lot of different places that i can go. >> isn't the whole purpose of passing on your personality is when you have kids? >> that used to be a thing. but now you will be able to have phone sex with yourself and people will prefer that. [laughter] >> oh, my oh, my god... >> i knew it was there. >> greg: you think people would end up indulging the thing they create, rather than see it as just an extension of themselves? >> do, narcissists are going to use this. they're going to clone their own personality and then they are going to call themselves up and say, hey, dude, how are you? and you're going to be like i'm lying in bed, i just took a viagra, how about you?

no, this is the biggest leap forward for narcissism and history. but i'm going to use it to make money. i will call my personality and because i secretly know that you are tired of yours, i'm going to rent it to you by the week. and then i will stay out of new york city and no one will know that you were only the second smartest walter. >> walter, as a narcissist, i will tell you what i will do with it. i will use it as a moment for self-reflection. outlook rate my own personality which will be both of my parents absolute worst nightmare and then i'm going to see how long i can tolerate myself before i lose my mind. but on a serious note, i don't think this will be able to sustain unforeseen circumstance and unprecedented events. a stupid example but imagine before transgender exists. you're asking this robot, what you think of the/them and the robot is programmed to use that as proper grammar and i need to explain to them a new gender, a

new woke ideology exists, it can't upkeep. and also at what point will the good outweigh the bad? what if they start a global takeover and start cloning you know if your own personality, to? >> that's a great point because once you've cloned yourself you can add an element so you can say clone walter kirn and make him the world's biggest rock star. and then have phone sex with him. [laughter] >> greg: you know what's funny, every thought you have you should add and have phone sex with it. i believe once trump is an office, he should definitely meet with putin. >> and have phone sex with him? actually, you know what, if it brings world peace, i'm all for it. >> greg: whatever works, that's what i say. especially in the bedroom. up next, viewer mail! [cheering and applause]

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>> announcer: you're watching "mailing it in".

>> greg: new jersey florida, i don't know what it means, asks what is the best mistake you have ever made? cat? >> it's hard for me to choose, they were all so much fun. i guess i could pick any of the mistakes that i have used for content. like i would have no content if not for my many mistakes. so probably some of those. or, the once there were too much fun to use for content, it's too hard to say, all of them. >> greg: tyrus? your best mistake? you have how many kids? >> none of my kids were -- how dare you besmirch me? none of my children were a mistake, they were all planned. [laughter] the mistakes was the mothers. crowd mack

>> greg: you are in such trouble. >> i'm not talking about my wife! >> greg: except for the one... >> if it was a mistake cat it would be in past tense. all of the ex-girlfriends. >> greg: there you go, very good. emily? >> i impulsively bought a dog in college because i was bored and chemistry class and it was a mistake but now he is the love of my life. but also travel too much. but he's amazing. >> greg: that's what happens. all right, walter. best mistake you have ever made? >> easy, going on redeye. way back when i was just on twitter, i was a lonely novelist, no one knew who i was, no one saw my tan except my wife. and greg gets in touch with me via twitter and he said i think you are weird like me, can you come on my show that is on fox news at 3:00 a.m. and nobody watches? so i came to new york and i did

it and i did it again and now i don't care about writing novels. i mean, it's half true. anyway, it was. best mistake i ever made. i made friends with all of you guys. >> and then you had phone sex with him afterwards. we've we got a date, baby! >> greg: i think we have time for one more question. what would you have done differently to make your hoax more convincing? >> i can't even answer this one. >> i'll go do you and they'll come back to you. >> hop in a time machine and go to alabama and like the 40s. they would have taken care of you the way you wanted, jesse. >> greg: emily? >> i would have not done it, probably. but if i was going to do it,.

>> greg: it's really easy, you don't do it in the winter. >> it has to be sex. that's the only reason anyone would be out in the cold. >> greg: yes! he was going on a grinder date. >> i would have hired white guys to do it. i would have hired white guys to beat me up. that's the stupidest thing in the world. is this trump country from couple black dudes? no. >> greg: in the snow, in the winter. >> you want to sublet. >> greg: nobody travels in the snow for subway! >> and again, nigerians. it's a snow fight, not really what they are known for. you need to get an eskimo if you want your butt kicked in the snow. >> greg: but the thing is, if you had hired white guys, then he could have ratted them out and saying they weren't in on it and that would have helped them but he couldn't rat out these guys because they were nigerian. so it's like you're telling me these black eyes directly from country? no. but if they were white guys he hired -- you artie spoke.

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at harbor freight, we design and test our own tools and sell them directly to you. no middleman. just quality tools you can trust at prices you'll love. whatever you do, do it for less at harbor freight. ♪ [cheering and applause] >> greg: out of time. walter kirn, emily austin, kat timpf, tyrus, or studio audience, i'm greg gutfeld, i love you, america. [cheering and applause] >> trace: good evening, i'm trace gallagher.