tv Gutfeld FOX News December 21, 2024 8:00pm-9:00pm PST
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[cheering and applause] >> good evening everyone, i'm kat timpf filling in for greg who was still shaking off the effects of his epidural. anyway, it is friday so you know what that means, let's welcome tonight gas! with a name like hers it's hard to believe she is not a romance author, fox news anchor, julie banderas. [cheering and applause] he has a photographic memory and they are all pictures of his own hair, fox news contributor, charlie hurt! [cheering and applause] santa blocked him because he kept trying to suggest giving kids razors. host of the david angelo show on youtube, david angelo. [cheering and applause] this time of year he always brings yuletide fear. maritimes besseling author,
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meeting and former nwa world champion, tyrus. [cheering and applause] >> kat: yes... before we get to some new stories, let's do this... >> announcer: greg's leftovers! >> kat: its leftovers where i read the jokes we did not use this week. scientists are now suggesting that columbus did not take syphilis to the americas but actually brought it back to europe. which explains why he changed his ship's names to the nina, peta and the it burns when i pee-a. a new study found taxi drivers are less prone to alzheimer's. after removing one outlier who kept repeating the same jokes.
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san francisco has hired a fact positive expert to work on weight discrimination. and if she loses a single pound she is fired. >> not a problem... >> kat: a republican lawmaker who was mocked for mistaking a "star wars" prop for a drone said he was totally just kidding. he added that he does have a girlfriend, she just goes to another school! a columbus funeral home will be the first in ohio to operate with a liquor license. and for an extra fee you can hire a d.j. who, for every time someone says they are in a better place, plays this sound effect... [airhorns blaring] congressional republicans are inviting over a shutdown bill well shut down looms. someone to reduce government spending and the rest want to do whatever trump said in the last 5 minutes. the american academy of ophthalmology put out a warning
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that gonorrhea can infect the eyes. which would be bad, unless you were a dude who needs an excuse to cry watching titanic. a new study found that shake shack received more complaints about being overpriced than any other fast food chain. as opposed to taco bell where you just pay on the other end. [cheering and applause] >> savage. >> kat: yeah,, it's great. marine veterinarians have developed a prosthetic device to save a sea turtle suffering from bubble syndrome. it is great news for his health but bad news for his spicy hot only fans page. a wild video shows chicago travellers beating each other with wet floor signs. in response lawmakers are looking at banning the signs. scientists say sprinkling diamond dust into the sky could offset almost all of climate change so far but it will cost
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175 trillion. man, if we only knew someone with enough jewellery to cover that. that concludes the joke part. in an interview this week, president joe biden could not name a single thing he regrets from his entire presidency. and before i share this clip, i want to reiterate that i scent president joe biden because he is currently the president of the united states. all right, here it is... >> it says you're preparing to leave the white house. any other regrets that you have, anything you wish you would have done differently? >> i guess if i thought a lot about it, there be something specific but not generically. >> kat: that's kind of refreshing. a president who admits he doesn't think a lot. look, i know this is joe biden
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we are talking about but you do think he would maybe be able to come up with at least one thing. it could have been a big thing like the disastrous pull out of afghanistan and the disgusting attempt to try to score political points... [applause] it also could have been something smaller like claiming his uncle was eaten by cannibals. or not installing an escalator on air force one. or that thing where he kept trying to shake hands with invisible people. or whatever this was. or how about this... >> the group included groundbreaking asian americans like joan -- joan -- i think i
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pronounce it correctly? >> kat: just don't call him joe biden late for dinner. but back to this week's interview. the closest he came to admitting he did anything wrong was to say he should have been better at talking about how he was helping the economy and how what he was doing was just going to take a while. >> i think the one thing that i should have spent more time talking about is that these things are going to take time to be put in place. i think the failure to connect between what is happening in the economy as a whole and what's going to happen to middle-class americans as a consequence of what we're doing, it's going to take a little bit of time. >> kat: he also dropped his doozy. >> there's a lot of things -- and look, i'm not going away. i'm no longer going to be president but i'm still going to be deeply involved in matters.
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>> kat: deeply involved in matters? what matters? eating putting on the beach? anyway, near the end of the interview he was asked what he would want his legacy to be as president. >> how do you want to be remembered? what you want your legacy to be? >> that i kept my word. that when i said i was going to do something, i did. >> kat: sure. he totally kept his word, except when he lied and said he wouldn't pardon his son. [cheering and applause] >> announcer: period! oh, man. julie, what did you think of that interview? >> i thought it was so well done. he was so eloquent, i'm so glad that we kept him in office this long. i can't believe he was actually two heartbeats away and in the 30 would probably be dead, of actually becoming reelected. this man was actually going to run again for president until
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july and then we could have ended up with kamala which i don't know which is worse. but i would say i'm not surprised he can't name any regrets because i don't think you could name any memories. or any accomplishments or any achievements. so why would he remember any regrets? he can't even name his grandchild's name. why would he remember any regrets? >> kat: david, you think he has regrets? >> i don't -- joe biden, i think jill has regrets. [cheering and applause] also, we are not calling her dr. jill biden anymore. she is mrs. biden now. okay? you can't pull a fast one all those years. but he looks like a nightmare. and i will tell you who was the hardest hit, it is the previous presidents. because they have always made it seem like that was a hard job. you know? they would have those sombre or profiles where obama would be
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looking all contemplative and this is hard -- meanwhile he is just watching wheel of fortune and eating fried cheerios. they are the ones who are struggling with this, i would think. >> kat: that's true. charlie, in your time skim it with a piece just recently that said it would be cut quote, hard to imagine that biden seriously thought he could do the world's most stressful job for another four years. yeah, no [bleep], right? [cheering and applause] what took them so long to admit that? many of those clips were from quite a while ago. >> the election, that's what happened. as soon as the election was over they didn't have to keep up the lies and it's kind of funny when you read that story, they talk about how people travelling with him noticed that he had to be held up by foreign leaders walking across the stage. it's like, okay,, people travelling with him, that was
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the press. that was "the new york times". this has been obvious for a very long time. i think what julie said is right, this overlying for him is i don't think he has any regrets because he has no idea what is going on. he has no thoughts one way or another. he kept one promise, he was going to unify the country, 66% of the american people disapprove of him. which is the highest -- [cheering and applause] disapproval rating in the history of the presidential polling. and he is going to get a 20 million-dollar book deal, who knows who is going to write it or what kind of word salad that will be. but he will get the $20 million. and he will ride off and i don't think he will be off to bigger and better things. >> kat: to david's point, tyrus, you know what he did? he basically quiet quit. as the president. >> and i wholeheartedly disagree with charlie. he is going off to bigger and
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better things, he is going off to valhalla. this interview upset me. this is cruel and unusual punishment. like what journalist in their right mind, when he saw the docket he would interview biden and thought, i'm going to go down memory lane with joe biden. where the [bleep] have you been? like what -- [cheering and applause] i'm sorry, but i understand the horses got a broken leg, you don't keep racing it, okay? >> memory lane is a very short lane. >> this isn't someone -- will he was a deceitful person but this is a person who was afflicted with -- father time was pulling the plug real [bleep] slow. so making him do interviews is mean. and here's the part, there's a part of him that is still trying
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to turn this around. saying we can still run again, we can fix this. and the rest of it says, look out our eyes in the mirror. he is past the point of no return and he should be comfortable at home and for the rest of his days, let the people who have been running it, dr. jill, pelosi, anybody who showed up to work early on wednesday, whoever has been running the country, let them ride this one out. whoever is writing these pardons, you may want to do a background check on them because it seems to be a lot of bad people being let out. so i think it is criminal to interview him right now. >> kat: then we wouldn't have any content for the show. counterpoint. up next, and apertures information on your neighbours affiliation. but first, with no great this christmas and familiar faces wanting to reflect on their time with him during the holidays.
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>> announcer: should we be concerned? >> kat: tonight on should we be concerned, a new app lets home buyers see their neighbours political leanings. all right julie, what do your neighbours think of you? >> that's funny because i have never spoken to any of them. >> kat: i have been to your house one time and it took me, i'm not kidding, three days to recover from that. just physically. >> she wasn't pregnant for the record. she did drink a lot. among other things. but no, i don't talk to my neighbours because i hate small talk, as you know. i don't want to have to say hello because it was turns and how are the kids and i'm like, i don't know. how's the husband? i'm like, what husband? i got a divorce. i just don't want to deal with it. but i do care who lives next door. if at some right-leaning crazy
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person or a left liberal loony, i don't want to live next to that. so i do want to know political affiliations, not that it ever talk to them about it. it's just nice to know. >> kat: charlie, this real estate program, i asked for the pronunciation but never received that information. it allows potential home buyers, they can be the political affiliations of a neighbourhood before they purchase a home. do you think this is an important thing or do you think it doesn't matter? or do you think you could figure it out, what you think? >> i think it's fantastic, especially the part where you look at it before you buy your house. because no normal person would give a. the only people that care about it are the tolerant leftists and then they can all congregate and leftist ghettos by themselves and the rest of us and live everywhere else. [cheering and applause] >> kat: to me tyrus, "doesn't really matter. i also kind of agree with
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julie's method of i don't really speak to my neighbours very much. what do you think? >> i think you don't need an app to figure with your neighbour is a [bleep] or not. it's pretty obvious. if they start putting christmas ornaments up in october, [bleep]. if they are always borrowing stuff but when they're asking for stuff they're trying to look in your house, [bleep]. if their car has no wheels in the front yard, illegal immigrant. like it's not hard to figure out about your neighbours. >> kat: the worst neighbours i have ever had, i think it had no reason to do with politics. my live in harlem i hated the fact that the neighbours lived in squalor so whatever vermin infested there apartment would
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come over to my apartment, that was a bummer and that i live next to this toxic couple this one time that would call the downstairs on me for watching tv to loud but were screaming at each other all the time. so none of that was politics. >> i have apologized so many times for that. we went to counselling. >> kat: david, how your neighbours feel about you running a razor business out of your apartment? >> they like it because it's a small business that sells made in america products. [laughter] [cheering] western razor.com, still may be time for christmas but if not, in new year's is great, two. >> always time for a christmas shave. >> that's true. i'm receiving a message it says your message of the green party, is that -- >> not less it's about smoking weed, no. >> i live in new york city with very thin walls so i know everything about my neighbours.
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and i can hear them pickup. the other thing about this, i am done downloading apps. it's over. i got enough apps. >> especially when you can open your window and just yell, how would you vote? >> i know, i'm just using shazam to see what their playing. >> kat: julie, this is only launch in south florida and new york. i know probably who you voted for in those states. >> no kidding! >> same in florida. >> maybe this app isn't even real. new york, your new york, your neighbours liberal. >> and in florida, yeah,, it's pretty obvious. if you live in new york city and are in an apartment, this is one of the things i did like about moving to the suburbs because i don't really like suburban life, if you overdo it, it's pretty difficult. it's very scary, actually. people drive everywhere, they
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don't walk. it's terrifying. but i also missed just having people that are angry all the time. i enjoyed that. i was that neighbour. but i also had some nasty neighbours so at least i don't run into them anymore. but when you have young children, you just weight until you get the first complaint because this kid wants to run up and down the hallways and knock on people's doors. if you have elderly people living next door, they will have a death wish out for you. >> i love it. i love is attained the suburbs. i just knock on random people's doors and i go, your tree is on my property. you better fix it! you better fix it! and then i go. i start a war that they didn't even have before. >> to go back to my previous point, [bleep]. no app needed! >> kat: up next, he stole someone's packages, now he is claiming emotional damages. [cheering and applause]
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>> announcer: it's coming your way, hey, hey,, it's a video of the day! [cheering and applause] >> kat: a porch pirate shook his booty before escaping with some loot. police in new jersey are looking for guys who stole a packet off someone's doorstep and were caught on a doorbell camera torquing earlier this month. role it. ♪ ♪ >> kat: so the victim posted the video online hoping to catch
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these guys who stole $74 worth of baby items and glassware. you sons of bitches! but get this. this is where it gets crazy. the crux saw the video online and then actually returned to the scene of the crime two days later to say this. >> not cool broke at cannot cool. come on. not cool at all man. that's my belief leave on the internet. >> kat: then after that he came back a third time just a few minutes later r wait till you see what he does here. >> i'm not given this back. >> kat: he returned one of the four glasses he stole. it is a christmas miracle. like if tonight, all of the comments say yea, cat is hosting [cheering and applause]
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get it? because the comments aren't always nice. >> oh, we get it. >> i'm with you, sister. what's in the box? what's in the box? >> i only get positive comments. >> it's because the razors get such a clean, smooth shave. >> that's true! and made in america, what more do you want people? >> kat: david, i don't know who rode this question for you, i do kind of want to know though and you may also when you hear what it is. david, can you dance like that? [cheering] [cheering] >> i can't. i have an old injury, i slipped disk. i was on the varsity backgammon team in high school. i can't get in there.
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but you know, at least they gave something in return. at least they did something. everyone is stealing these packages, i think they should still have to leave a review of the product online. because they are going to be the most honest. like a, this waffle iron, it cooked evenly. and at this price, it's a steel. wink emoji. wink emoji. >> kat: julie, it is unbelievable that they steal and then they show up to say, hey,, it's really not cool that you show that video of my but on the internet. >> you realize that the glass they returned is broken. that is the reason they return it. it's like dude, i still your glasses and you left me with a broken one so i'm taking it back. you're worse than i am, return every thing to amazon. i have to start returning things i steel off people's porches.
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>> kat: tyrus, is this ever happened to you? >> no. no. >> the stealing part? that was racist. [laughter] >> actually was racist that you thought it. that's the racist part. remember i said before? [cheering and applause] because you have to come into my property to get to where they get the gift sat and there won't be enough time for you to get out. so it's almost like a game. like we got one coming in. because if someone with a hoodie dressed in black comes to my house at night, unless they are yelling cousin, it's there ass. [laughter] which kind of proves been terraces first point which makes me a [bleep].
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>> porch pirates have an app and on it it says don't go to tyrus' house. so they know to avoid it. but i think this was a product review. i think what they are upset about is the fact that it was baby toys and they were like -- that's why they went back. can you imagine, you steal somebody's package and it turns out to be baby toys? who wants that? >> cat might. >> or maybe a baby wants it. what's the matter with you? >> you think of baby was -- >> i think a baby wants a baby toy. are you -- >> kat: i just can't believe he drove back. like how dare you show my ass on the internet? you are the father, there something wrong with you. >> i think if you were going to develop one more app, it would be this. just showing all the porch pirate videos on the internet. i could watch this all day long. >> not all in the mood but it
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shows how little thief sphere law enforcement now. to where they will return to the scene of the crime over and over again because they know that for whatever they are stealing, it's not enough to actually go to jail. that is still a woman's home that she has to worry about maybe next time they're not taking baby toys, they are taking her. it is sad that it has gotten to the point where criminals can just show up at your home whenever they feel like it's. >> what a buzz kill... >> kat: merry christmas... coming up, are you a kook to buy a bunker against a nuke? [cheering and applause] if you have wet amd, you never want to lose sight of the things you love. some things should stand the test of time. long-lasting eylea hd could significantly improve your vision. more people on eylea hd had no fluid in the retina
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bunkers. all right julie, there is an increase in sales of private bunkers. i guess rising nuclear threats, global security concerns, that kind of happy stuff. is that what you want for christmas this year? >> that's dumb. if there's a nuclear attack, i don't want to survive that [bleep]. i will be outside. i wish they would come up for something for the drones. who cares about nuclear attacks, if one happens we are all dead. if everyone else is dead, you're going to come out and then what are you going to do? everything is gone and it's just you by yourself. actually, that sounds amazing. i'm getting a bunker for christmas. >> kat: my favourite sentence in this article was meanwhile, government disaster experts say bunkers are necessary. imagine being convinced by that at this point. imagine being like oh, well if the government expert -- when i read government experts, i stop reading and stop listening at this point.
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>> and the story doesn't say weather it protects you from global warming which is basically what the government experts are worried about. i think the whole story is b.s. because this is like guns. anyone who owns guns, you don't ever tell anybody about the guns you own. similarly, if you have a nuclear bunker, you are not going to tell your neighbours you have a nuclear bunker because where are they going to go? during the zombie apocalypse? you definitely would not tell it to national public radio. >> kat: well bernard and doris did. >> i think they are fakers. >> kat: bernard and doris have a bunker with beds for about 25 people. who likes 25 people? >> fake propers. >> kat: i don't know. david, this is a two-part question. number 1, are you worried about world war iii? number 2, what is western razors disaster plan?
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>> i'm going to start with the second question. first of all, at the prices we are unloading these razors, i mean that is the problem i'm worried about. people are getting too good of a deal. i haven't figured out yet, we have to do something. the other thing, i'm not worried about world war iii. i live in new york, i wish putin would nuke us. i would be fine getting new if it killed my upstairs neighbour, two. i would be all right with it. >> kat: well i hope they are watching. [laughter] >> they are. they're moving furniture around right now. >> they've got a party going on above you. >> kat: tyrus, the basic bunkers cost around $20,000. but some more elaborate ones can
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get into the millions. >> but if you keep reading, there is a disclaimer that says that they probably won't work. so that is right up there with buying a headless condom. >> hot tonight, hot tonight! >> we feel safe, but are we really safe? >> kat: the answer to that for anyone watching, in both cases is no. >> i think we need to focus on the name of the two people. bernard and -- >> doris. >> greg: the fact that those two people with those names came together at all means there had to be a lot of serial killing for them to be together. they are looking for 25 victims to slow kill over the apocalypse. so my advice to anyone, if your neighbours are bernard and what was it? >> doris and bernard. >> they are [bleep]. >> kat: and 25 of their
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closest friends. according to this article, charlie, the world's largest bunker factory is in texas. >> surprised. >> kat: which is the least surprising thing i've ever heard. i mean that as a complement to texas. >> who could have seen that coming? >> kat: do you want to bunker? >> no, i don't! i'm with julie. i would rather just be in ground zero and have it all over with. be efficient about it. i mean, you saw the day after. >> she doesn't watch movies. >> kat: if adam sandler isn't in it i haven't seen it. >> it's a generational thing. for those of us the day after it came out, we had nightmares for years. you remember seeing it when it came out? >> i did not see it. >> your parents to let you see it? >> i'm so much younger than you... crowd mack. >> i don't see that one either,
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i'm on tik tok man. >> i sought, i'm old as dirt, i'm good with it. not like 60 years old, having a baby old. [cheering] [cheering and applause] >> can i just say one thing though? you don't have to worry about a headless condom wearing that ridiculous sweater. [laughter] >> so now were going to sing christmas carols! ladies and gentlemen, charlie hurt! [cheering and applause] >> kat: i honestly feel like this was education on tv. you're welcome, america. viewer mail is up next, don't go away. [cheering and applause]
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>> announcer: you're watching "mailing it in". >> kat: what in life is worth it? tyrus, you first. [laughter] >> tolerance. i will go with tolerance. >> kat: david, what about you? [laughter] >> swallowing. for me it's swallowing. i don't do it. >> i say that all the time. [laughter] >> spicy show tonight!
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wow! [cheering and applause] >> barkeep, i'm out of alcohol. >> kat: julie, what about you? aside from swallowing. [cheering] >> small talk. answering the phone. talking to strangers, having to greet -- just one answer? so that's all. just swallowing. >> charli? >> having a red face. >> you can't sit next to her. >> your face matches her dress. >> what she says? the only reason i was going to allow the makeup on his because i was sitting down. >> and it burnt off. >> charlie, with that to you don't need to worry about swallowing. [laughter] [cheering and applause] >> we can all go home now!
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we can all go home now! >> oh, my god! >> we are no longer on the air, it's all right. >> kat: will you not be answering the question? >> what's the question? >> what in life is more effort than it's worth it? >> other than the show? [laughter] >> all right. >> i would say exercise. >> exercise, oh that is -- i don't know if anyone agrees with that. okay. next up. what is your favourite -- for me my answer i guess would be convincing someone to care about you. all right. what was your favourite holiday comfort food when you were a child and you still enjoy today? for me, it is parochial. i love to eat that. we eat soup, we eat perogies, it is a great time, it's polish if you can't tell, i love it, yes, i still do, julie, what about you? >> i don't know, pasta i guess. i don't eat carbs anymore. i miss -- i don't miss those days. >> isn't it hard to eat the pasta if you don't swallow?
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[cheering] sorry back it's just -- my turn? >> yes, sure... >> thank you. and cranberry sauce. >> so good! >> gross, that's disgusting. i never swallow that either. >> if you did, you'd relax a little bit. cranberry sauce is phenomenal. i'm sorry kat. >> david? >> i think for me it was a nice soup. cuisine from southern india. >> did that come from fireplace filming when you said it? >> charlie, are you okay with this question? is this to personal? is there a childhood food that you like to the child? >> i would say stake.
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>> kat: you wait stake as a baby? >> he grew up on a farm. >> my grandfather is a cattle farmer, we ate steak at a very early age. while, sure. i believe you. all right. pete, age 72 asks, what are your best and/or worst family holiday traditions? >> traditions or gifts? because i'm going with gifts, my mom bought me a shoe rack when i was a kid from a brochure that may be some of you that are like over 40 would know, harriet carter. you remember harriet carter? they were the worst gifts ever. it was a shoe rack. i was like eight. >> kat: so yours was killing cowles or -- >> my best christmas presents and my worst christmas presents are the same. socks. when i was little you hated getting socks. now it's all that i want. i just want those socks. >> you should ask for ties. [laughter]
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and one more thing. eyebrows. [laughter] >> thanks for coming on charlie. >> kat: david? >> let's see, my best and worst holiday tradition... for starters, it's spending times with the gutfeld family. [cheering and applause] and as for the best one... [laughter] >> kat: get it? he said where the worst. tyrus? >> i have one answer for both questions. showing up. >> kat: showing up... for me, i was spent christmas with my family every year but i'm too pregnant to travel so i have to develop some new traditions. >> like sometimes you show up and you go, what was i thinking? and then other times you know he's not showing up so you just
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go about your day. it's good and bad. >> kat: well... how about this. don't go away, we will be right back. [cheering and applause] big news for mahomes! i'm switching to iphone 16 pro at t-mobile! it's built for apple intelligence. that's like peanut butter on jelly... on gold. get four iphone 16 pro on us, plus four lines for $25 bucks. what a deal. ya'll giving it away too fast t-mobile, slow down. emergen-c crystals pop and fizz when you throw them back. and who doesn't love a good throwback? ♪ now with vitamin d for the dark days of winter. give your dog more days of play with librela, a once-monthly injection given by your vet that controls osteoarthritis pain in dogs. librela should not be used in breeding, pregnant, or lactating dogs. this is the best day of my life!
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♪ librela ♪ (dog barks) we're told in genesis chapter 1:26 that god is made man in his image and by his likeness has he made him. genesis is a book of fundamental importance for the jewish and christian faiths and a literary masterpiece that has profoundly shaped western civilization. now, in this exclusive online course from hillsdale college, you can deepen your understanding of how this ancient book is essential to you today. sign up for the genesis story. absolutely free at learnfromhillsdale.org. dr. justin jackson, a distinguished hillsdale college professor, will guide you through this fascinating free online course that unfolds the biblical stories of adam and eve, abraham, isaac, jacob and joseph. when you sign up, you'll explore some of life's most important questions, gain a greater appreciation for how the bible confronts pain and hardship
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we now return to our interview with the insurance whistleblower. [ distorted ] i just think everyone should know there's an insurance company out there exposing other companies' rates so you can compare them and save. hmm. sounds like trouble. it's great, actually! it's called autoquote explorer from progressive. here, look! see, we show you our direct rates and their rates, even if we're not the lowest. so, whistleblower usually means you're exposing something bad. i thought it meant calling attention to something helpful. you know, like, toot toot, check it out!
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this thing's the best! no? [cheering and applause] >> kat: thank you to julie banderas, charlie hurt, david angelo, samantha dravis and our studio audience. fox news at night is next. on behalf of greg gutfeld, i love you, america. [cheering and applause that's how fox reports this saturday december 21. i am jon scott. ♪
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