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tv   Red Eye  FOX News  April 20, 2010 3:00am-4:00am EDT

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>> glenn: use truth as your anvil and violence as your hammer. pound away, america. from new york, welcome to "red eye." it is like my three sons if bisons you mean terrified run aways hiding in a shipping container i hid in my back ready yeah. now to andy levy for a pre game report. andy, what's coming up on the show? >> a former mayor wants city employees to quit smoking or face penalties, possibly including being fired. we will ask questions like what's up with that? straight ahead. and an iranian cleric says women who wear revealing clothing are causing earthquakes. and finally they will perform live in studio and if you are good they may perform a red eye theme show. >> thank you, andy jie. thank you andy. that's what you sound like. >> not at all. >> i stand by what i said. >> in your tiny head that's
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what i sound like. let's welcome our guests. i am here with the lovely and delicious diana alzone. she is so hot spark plugs are now diana falzone clubs. he is funnier than a drunken clown making balloon animals out of a smurf's intestine. and my repulsive sidekick. the epa declared his pants a super fine site. and next to me i am so excited i might grow up. the great pat man gnaw han from the awesome band train. their latest cd is called "save me san francisco." it features the number one single" hey soul sister." if musical geniuses were jello shots i would do him and throw up. and his sales have been hammered, new york correspondent. how are you doing piece of trash? >> you know who gives me the sivers is cj shivers.
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and bill needs a new liver. sad face. >> we'll get you one. does lighting up a red mean your job is dead? should rolling papers lead to walk papers? that's two yes'. if brad burn has her evil, evil way, side note, who knew women could be mayors? >> oh my god. >> congratulations. the federal battle ax is asking them to vote on a measure that would permit employers to ban smoking. they say you can get fired even if it is in the privacy -- smoking is in the privacy of their own damn home explains the mayer why. quote, for employees they should have one year to quit smoking using chewing tobacco or face disciplinary action that includes termination. that's a weird voice. as usual stories like these we go to fox news smoking cory spawn department.
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what say you party puff? >> they don't call him party puff mcmenthols for nothing. is it scary? >> man, party puff is amazing. what am i doing here? i should be with party puff on stage. >> we all want for with party puff. >> the more government gets involved with things the more things get broken. i think maybe she should think more about what hair salon she is going to than who is smoking cigarettes. >> yes. she should be looking into makeovers and not smoke embers. >> yes, that's a t-shirt. yes, it is. >> joe, could you imagine them trying to actually enforce such a policy? how would they do that? would they smell your clothes? >> i guess they would. clearly because she looks like sean penn in "carlito's way." she is laying down the law of her own. >> to be fair, she has much
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more of a forehead than sean. >> stop it. she is probably a nice lady. >> it is so true. >> let's stop concentrating on her looks and look at the policy. >> that's what is so ridiculous about it. you can essentially be a heroin user and have a better shot at keeping your job because you don't cook up in front of the building entrance. >> thank god. >> all you have to do is -- >> finally somebody is thinking rock and roll here. >> bill, you ascribe to that belief. >> i can't afford the spoon, greg, you know that. my heroin days are long behind me, and should be for you, audience. >> dye anne, wouldn't -- diane, wouldn't it cause people to smoke more? the more you demonize. it the cooler it makes it appear. >> yes, it is rebels with a cause. first of all, she is not thinking like a politician. she just lost half of her voting population doing this. she is not being diplomatic with this. i am not feeling it. although we should not be
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picking on her looks thank you very much. >> bill, coming from you and your hair, she just needed a little work on the hair. like your hair it is perfect. >> how much product is in there. that's all i spend my money on. >> is this an example of false fake bravery? they won't stand up in protest. they get winded. you will nef see smokers protesting anything. so it is easy to go after. it makes you feel brave. >> yeah, it does make her feel brave. it is an easy ploy to make a little noise. i'm a smoker. we have been beaten around the kitchen for so long we put up with this now. we are the battered wife. the husband keeps coming home and screaming at us. it is just like, you know what, i don't have nowhere to
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go. >> i am tired of falling down the stairs. >> bill, last question, as a smoark you -- you smoke mainly to hide your foul body odor. if you were to quit smoking it would make it worse for people around you. in a way it would hurt people at work. >> you could ask that entire question without delving into body odor. not to edit you, but that was unnecessary. i am a virginia slim gal. when i am smoking my slim ladies i used to say, you have come a long way, baby. now i am at home saying, oh my god. what if somebody sees me. it is because it is the law and because i am dressed like billy jean king. that's not something i do at work. >> did you ever smoke cigarettes? >> yeah. >> and you no longer smoke now? >> yeah, and you go through the phase where you want everybody to do what you are doing. i don't think it is a good idea to tell everybody what to do and then you will be scrutinized.
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they say you should change and then let's make our punch list for you. >> you are right. if my smoking irritates her and when i am not even around her i can say her appearance irritates me. >> and you know her curl iron causes a lot of smoke. this is very hipocritical, greg. she has to light those up once a time a work. from tobacco to tremors, when it comes to earthquakes, women are at fault. did you get that? it was terrible and worthless. that's according to a senior iranian cleric who says those who wary veiling clothing and behave per miss skew us with are to blame for the earth's rumbling. he is quoted as saying, many women who do not dress modestly lead young men astray, corrupt their chas tau tau tee and creates adultery and creates earthquakes.
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i don't know what that accent was. it follows remarks from am ma din gnaw god that a quake is certain to hit tehran and many of the 12 million residents should relocate. i believe we have tape of ma -- mamuhd and the claire i can are. -- the cleric. >> that's amazing they can drive. >> they don't own a car, greg. that was doctored. >> i have to say, as crazy as it sounds, isn't he kind of right? >> at first i thought, this guy has a point. and then i thought, i think i will speak for all guys in bands and say, send those ladies on over. let's get rid of them out of iran and get them right back to where -- >> the women there are
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beautiful. they are beautiful. would you tour there? >> absolutely. i can't wait jie. the groupies would be be great. diana, the clothing you wear, do you ever worry that sometimes it could cause major disasters? >> i think about that every day. in fact, i'm like, what is today's richter scale going to do? will it go up if i show more skin? this is ridiculous. honestly, do we really need to say it, it is absurd. and if they are really afraid of this, perhaps they should just move all of the women to paps corbus and i am in favor. >> pat robertson and hugo chavez and depap-chopra credited the earthquake with human behavior. what is with them? what is with them? you must have some insight into cpopra? >> i have to text him later and find out exactly what is going on. >> you text him sf. >> yes. >> what does he text back? >> in fairness, so do i, greg. >> he helps me find my inner
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peace. >> let's get this straight. >> the get a piece. >> an older spiritual man is trying to help a young, beautiful girl seek inner peace through texting? >> yeah. >> i believe that. i believe that almost as much as i believe the earthquake was caused by a woman's dress. >> and he also has an accounting background and wanted to help you with your taxes? >> why do they feel the need to link behavior with natural disaster? do they just fear women? >> i think they do. i don't understand it. have i never in my -- i have never in my life seen an earthquake caused because a woman's earth is too short. maybe a little fog or something. but it is so crazy. iran, they are like the crazy uncle in your family. they just sit in the corner and says crazy stuff. it is that crazy where your uncle is going, you know, women with cleavage, they
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cause earthquakes. okay, uncle iran. >> and then there is a hour rabble stench and everybody has to leave. last word on the topic, i often feel you are responsible for most bad things that happen in the world. >> uncalled for again. >> it wasn't even a question. >> if it were a, offended. until i read this article i didn't know iran had so many earthquakes. it is like one san andreas fault after another after another. i don't want to question their intelligence, but these people want a nuclear reactor? really? you want a place with that many earthquakes? you want something that can split open your reactor? that thing will break open. >> i love it. you are an expert on nuclear reactors. >> for more information go to bill at nuclear reactor .org. and now to the greg-alogue. it is a thimble of thoughtfulness.
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>> you know -- no one would put a reactor on an island. >> 3 mile island. >> bill clinton wrote a piece in the new york times where he used the anniversary of the oklahoma city bombing to make a political point. you could see it coming. here it is -- 15 years ago the line was crossed in oklahoma city and the current climate with so many threats against the president, members of congress and other public servants. we owe it to the victims of oklahoma city. >> there is a lot wrong with that quote. we owe it to the victims, unquote not to cross this line again. we? it is as if he is asking us not to blow stuff up. people amenable to that was not planing on it anyway. and he says, it only makes me think of clinton when his face wasn't red with lipstick it was red with anger and sometimes ketchup.
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the worst is the current climate thing. there is no more violence than before. there are tea parties from last week. have i seen scare yes, sir office picnics. when captain busy hands talks about the vast echo chamber, he is talking about those who smear their intellectual adversaries as racists. it is happening so much it is starting to make me really, really, really mad. maybe that's the point. if you disagree you are a racist homophobe who hate tofu. >> let's go to the tele prompter. >> they are as high as i am. that was a hard-hitting greg-alogue. let's go to name dropper greg. >> hi, name dropper greg. >> hi, greg. i have to say, awesome greg-alo. i was just telling my close friend morgan free man about how amazing it was on the way to charlize theron's house for
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ryan secrist's birthday. i am giving him a fuzzy navalen gnaw ma and i am out of perk cassette. >> now to flamboyant greg and see what he thinks. >> fantastic! that was fantastic, greg! fantastic, fantastic, fantastic! and i am out of perk cassette. >> and now to sexually confused greg and see what he thinks. that greg might have been the best greg-alogue you have ever written. i notice you have lost a lot of weight and your peck muscles are so clearly defined. not that i'm into that thing. i totally dig chicks. i can't stress that. really, really hot chicks, ones with reproductive internal organs. do you have any perk cassettes? >> he definitely has a problem. isn't it more unhealthy not to express anger at poll decisions? -- politicians? wouldn't that be weirder? >> i feel like bill clinton is a real smart guy.
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i think he would be the community's best service if we were to just express the -- express all of the lost -- the familys that had lost someone to say, we are still thinking about you and our hearts are still with you, and we remember. >> and what are you doing later? >> well, you know, while you are there, might as well. >> joe, what do you think? were they right to link the oklahoma bombing to anger? >> i don't know. i think his heart was probably in the right place. i think that is a stretch to relate present anger to the oklahoma city bombing. i think these articles can do more harm than good. instead of looking it like we are putting our chest out and moving forward it makes us look vulnerable still. i don't think we should ever put that out there to the public because our enemies can read that and say, they are still reeling about this. this is great. >> that's a very per accept tiff point. diana, weigh in.
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>> i think bill clinton is an eloquent speaker. he usually can service his audience and everybody likes to hear what he has to say. this is the wrong time and wrong place. i understand where the sentiment was. >> quick question, does he text you as well? >> actually yes. about meditation and yoga. >> he feels your pain. >> we try to work out as much as possible. name dropping greg and i are together. what do we have to gain by listening to more train? try everything, you stupid jerk ingrates.
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>> you are so skinny. 245* song has been downloaded about 57 million times. a million of those were me. it is that good. also i was drunk that day. the number one selling single "hey soul sister" is from the new scpes great album called" save me, san francisco." train's lead singer is here with us for the entire hour. let's talk. you have had 9 songs in the top 20 of the hot adult top 40 charts. you basically own that chart. >> basically. >> what is it about hot adultsthat like train? >> well -- >> maybe you should ask me
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that. >> yeah, what is it? >> i enjoy being hot and i like train. end of story. off my back. >> good point. >> are you done, bill? are you going to let him finish. >> continue. >> i think that's a better answer than anything i had. >> i had this theory that only hot adults like your music. when i see crowds and videos, i never see ugly people near you. is that a strategy? >> you know, the truth is fans of ours have been from our generation, and now we have a whole new generation of people coming to train shows. it is really fun to see like half of the crowd being everything from 14-year-old girls to 18-year-old boys in college. it is fun. >> say 16-year-old girls. >> i mean 18. they are all 18-year-old adults. >> it is smart you guys are considered -- the music is considered adult because we all end up there, and you can do this for the rest of your life without feeling silly,
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you know what i mean? >> we have talked about that a lot. we have always been the slow-growing band that's been here for a longtime. it's been 15 years, and instead of the hot thing that came and went. we are okay with that. >> i read articles where they called your come back a surprising come back. it is like saying it is a surprise we have a show. it is like you od's in 2005 and somehow you were brought back to life. it is not a surprising come back. you have been putting out great stuff for years, right? >> well, thanks. do you want to say anything to that, jimmy? >> i am not surprised. >> jimmy, you are writing a novel, aren't you? >> i finished the novel. but then we got busy with this record, and i need to -- i'm gonna hold off on releasing it. >> can you tell me what it is about? >> it is a fiction, loosely based on a lot of the road journals i used to write for the band on our website. >> in any part of this novel does the lead singer get
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killed? >> yes. >> tell me, when ever anybody does something about their life, they always kill the main -- like the lead singer or whoever is in charge. >> in all fairness, i kill the entire band in chapter one, gone. >> speaking of killing, you are going to do a special song about "red eye" right now. >> do you want us to do it now? >> can the camera -- i have a special -- i just want to make sure i was prepared for this in every way. the camera can make sure i have the whole -- that would be great. >> very nice. wow! >> i have got to get me one of those. >> yes, you do. 59 bucks and you can get them at a train show. okay, jimmy. >> ♪ when you want it from the heart ♪ ♪ we give it from the gut ♪ this is a show that makes you ♪
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say -- what? ♪ when your ambien's gone ♪ ♪ and nothing else is on ♪ red eye, red eye, red eye ♪ it is only wasted time if there is something else to do ♪ ♪ red eye, red eye, red eye >> that was absolutely beautiful. >> this is the will couldest thing that ever happened on our show jie. that is any pif pho knee. there is nothing else you can do at this tie. >> particularly if the ambien's gone. >> you can't walk out and [bleep]. >> i watch our show sometimes, and you can absolutely do that. >> "hey soul sister" is the most downloadable -- what is it up to 2.5 million? >> up to about 3. we were just at columbia records a minute ago and got our 3 million download plaque. >> is it weird looking at it that way now instead of
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albums? the whole world has shifted. >> yeah, it is a strange world. we went from "meet virginia" and selling a million records and" drops of jupiter "and millions of records and now they don't talk about that. it is about singles and it reminds me of motown days where it is about a song that affects people's lives. but it seems like our album is doing well on itunes too. >> i was going to say, does it make it harder for you to think about creating albums as opposed to -- i mean maybe you don't have to just single, single, single. >> i actually asked that question today to the guys at columbia. i was like, are you gonna keep making records? and they are like, yeah, that's what we do, make albums. bands like you guys, you make it happen. so it would be hard for us to go write a song and put a song out. that's just so much banking on one thing. >> we have always made albums
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and thought of it that way instead of singles. it it would be difficult to just try to write hit songs. >> you do go the novelty route though. that might be nice. >> like spiders and snakes. >> or jim stafford. we didn't want to talk about that here. >> i don't know if he knows that. >> all right, we have to move on. more with pat and he will sing train's hit song "hey soul sister" where you have heard everywhere. and do you have a comment on the show? e-mail us on red eye at fox news .com. and to leave a voicemail it is so easy it will make you throw up. still to come, the half time report from andy levy. he is a sad, little man. >> tonight's half time report is sponsored by my neighbor dave. he is dropping by unannounced and can't keep his mouth shut. but if i am ever in trouble he has my back. thanks, neighbor dave.
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welcome back. let's find out if we have gotten anything wrong so far. now to andy levy. the metros returned to metro square to unveil a 10-match local expedition starting with the illinois crabs. they hit the pile first. what say you? >> i am excited about the metros calling up ike davis from the 2-bit confederacy. >> who isn't? >> i think he has an excellent career ahead.
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i think he is getting old. >> maybe this is the last one, put it away, bury it. >> bring it out later at a party. florida mayor wants city employees to quit smoking or be fired. you refer to laura brad burn as a bitter old battle ax. shame on you you massage nis sexist pig. >> i only did it for literal purposes. she understood that. >> she is only 46. >> she is a year older than me. opposites attract. >> you said brad burn looks like sean penn in "carlito's way" and as of 2006 she is single and you know what that means. >> i am facebooking her tonight. >> more like derosa's way. >> i will attach a picture from larry of the three stooges and say thinking of you. >> terrible. >> pat, you said every time the government gets involved it gets broken. you are not one of those tea partiers, are you?
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>> he does like to party. >> i do get the feeling are you seriously thinking about replacing your drummer with mcmenthol. >> i am thinking about replacing everybody in my life. >> greg, you said you will never see smokers protest anything. that's because every place they would protest is smoke-free. >> it kept us off the roads and in our homes. we can't even smoke in our homes now. what is happening in this world? >> i only smoke four cigarettes a night. >> thanks. >> thought you might loo i can to know. >> and bill smoke to hide his foul body odor. last year the city council passed a dress code that required city employeeses to wear de yoder rent and wear underwater. so you are 0 for 3. >> bill smokes 4 a night. >> interesting fact, in london when they outlawed the smoking in publics, the biggest problem was the stench of
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flatule nce from the old men and the dogs. >> ernest heming way. >> iranian clerics say women who wear revealing clothing and dress per miss skew us withly are to blame. fact, many ignore the strip law that says they have to be covered head to toe. and fact, iran is one of the most earthquake prone countries. >> well, say goodbye to geologists. we have andy levy. >> you said it is on a fault line, and i don't think that is true. >> according to my source it is true. >> do you mean sores? >> come on, man, really? after all these years, you and me. i'm the real dog. >> there is no you and me. there never has been a you and me. >> not a great way to start off the week. don't talk to me for the rest of the show. >> greg-alogue bill clinton's
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ad, and it is funny every one of your guys is a percocette addict. >> they are all fans though. you don't see that often. and i didn't notice between everybody day and -- every day greg and sexually confused greg. >> what's that? >> nothing. >> four cigarettes. >> are you right, america doesn't need a lesson from a person whose right coined the term vast right wing conspiracy to show that little willies were turning into slikt willies in the office. >> that was unnecessary. >> on the other hand "people" is right and they should stop agrees. anding booze like this are not helpful. >> andy, i wrote that when i
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was broke. >> not helpful to the nation's dialogue. >> i did not write that book. andy has been putting my name on inflammatory materials and circulating them through the country. >> proof. >> it doesn't look handwritten, greg. >> question for pat. you say soul sister has been downloaded 57 million times. that lacks a ring of truth. >> it is pretty close. it is more like 3 million in the u.s., but it is going to be 57. >> and lastly, greg, you said you downloaded it a million times yourself. you know you don't have to do it, right? once you download it you can play as many times you want. oh jeez. >> once you buy it, it is yours. >> i'm glad i found out now. >> a million hits later i'm afraid. >> i'm psyched that you didn't know that. >> it is a good strategy to
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tell them. >> i apologize. i feel pretty bad about that. >> no, that's cool. i have to pay for a retaining wall that the great state of washington is making me put out at my house. >> they don't know about the rules. >> greg, i will go now so you can talk about the great state of washington. >> i can't wait. a whole segment. go away, andy, you make me sick to my stomach. >> now let's welcome back diana falzone. she is so hot the movie "some like it hot" is now called some like it diana falzone. and if jokes why bees he would be a bee keeper. we are running low. and lead singer pat monohan, if we were a hule i would ride that ass all the way to town to pick groceries of course. >> i never want to hear that again. >> you can't unhear it.
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>> i didn't want to hear it that time. >> i know what you are thinking, it is 3:30 a.m. or 12:30 de end ping on where you are. where are my sex farms? that's a great question and here is the story. a washington state man was arrested last week -- andy was right. he was arrested on charges of raiding a bestiality farm south of the canadian border. one-time dot-com millionaire was on probation when authorities raided his farms and seized dozens of dogs, horses and mice along with animal porno. a police source says the mice had their tailses cutoff, smothered in vaseline and a string tied around them and unfortunately sadly they had to be euthanatized. county deputies found tapes of a british man having sex with several large breed dogs.
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and then what comes county sheriff? they say he was promoting tourism of this nature for bestiality. of course we went to a cat for comment. >> it could be worse for the cat, don't we agree? >> joe, where is peta? where is peta? >> well, they are busy protesting a kfc down the street, those are the real issues. don't you think this is just -- i think this whole thing is a ploy by the hemp farmers. they got together saying, we need to get the heat off of us. say they are having sex on that farm with the animals. that's -- what we are doing is nothing compared to that. >> why yeah, it is true they will let you to. -- they will let you go. pat they had to euthanize the mice. what's up with this world?
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> i don't know. >> couldn't they just let them go. your whole body is cringing. i wouldn't know this if i was president here. now i am just putting myself through the whole thing. >> and you won't be able to unknow it. >> i feel so badly for those animals i don't know how to express it. >> it is an amazing cruelty because you never know what the animal is thinking at the time if he or she is thinking it or not thinking it or enjoying it or not, but we won't go there. you never, ever see women doing this sort of thing unless they are being paid for by men. there is never -- women do not do these things. what is wrong with men? >> wow, that's a big, long question. there is so much. it is just so cruel. i think bestiality is endless control and a power thing. it is a sign this guy could be a psychotic murderer. >> my feeling is they didn't have stuffed animals at home.
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>> i love the fact that the reporter had to specify it was a large breed dog he had sex with. it is slightly less cruel than if it was with a chiuaua. don't worry, it was a large breed. >> i love how they accused him of promoting tourism like it was a disney world for pervs. >> i am happy bill brought notes about the large breed. this is disgusting anyway you slice it, but why are they having sex with disgusting animals like dogs and horses. why not a sexy cat? if i was going to do this i would go for a panther. >> this is weird. >> i have to and this discussion -- to end this discussion. coming up, so often will change the way you think of the word awesome. and i know where you live. train performs on" red eye "while i go through their belongings in the green room.
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so you want more pat
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monohan and jimmy stafford? or maybe pat monohan and jimmy stafford one more view. how about more. here is their chart topping hit "hey soul sister" take it away boys. >> ♪ hey ♪ hey ♪ highway ♪ your lipstick stain ♪ on the front lobe ♪ of my left side brain ♪ i knew i wouldn't forget you ♪ ♪ and so i went and blow my mind ♪ ♪ your sweet moon beam. ♪ he smell of you ♪ every single dream i dream ♪ ♪ i knew when we collided you're the one i have decided. ♪ whose one of my kind
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♪ hey soul sister ♪ hey that mister mister on the radio, stereo ♪ ♪ the way you move ain't fair you know ♪ ♪ hey soul sister ♪ i don't want to miss a single thing ♪ ♪ you do, tonight ♪ hey, hey ♪ just in time ♪ i'm so glad you have a one track mind like me ♪ ♪ you gave my life direction ♪ a game show love connection ♪ ♪ we can't deny ♪ i'm so upset ♪ my heart is bound to beat outside my untrimed chest ♪
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♪ i believe in you ♪ like a virgin you're madonna ♪ ♪ and i'm always gonna wanna blow your mind. ♪ hey soul sister ♪ hey that mister mister ♪ on the radio, stereo ♪ the way you move ain't fair you know ♪ ♪ hey soul sister ♪ i don't wanna miss a single thing you do ♪ ♪ tonight ♪ the way you can cut a rug ♪ watching you is the only drug i need. ♪ you're the only one i'm dreaming of ♪ ♪ i can be myself ♪ in fact there is nothing i can't be ♪ ♪ i want the world to see you be with me ♪ ♪ hey soul sister ♪ hey that mister, mister ♪ ♪ on the radio, stereo
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♪ the way you move ain't fair you know ♪ ♪ hey soul sister, i don't wanna miss a single thing you do ♪ ♪ tonight ♪ hey soul sister ♪ i don't wanna miss a single thing you do ♪ ♪ tonightett ♪ hey, hey ♪ hey ♪ tonight ♪ hey, hey ♪ hey ♪ tonight >> well done. [applause] >> i noticed they are using the ma rock caws. very davie jones. >> that's what i was going for. >> i love the fact you are bringing back the lovely you
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-- ukelele ♪ ♪ you cannot not smile when you are playing the ukelele. >> and you were trying. >> and you can use it to beat people over the head with. >> i don't like that part. >> you should see jimmy do his ukelele jimmy hendrix on stage. it is on fire. >> that is amazing. bink. >> train's official website is train line .com. want to make sure. when we come back, your voice mails. don't go anywhere.
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your elbow came up and hit him in the head? >> are you asking me or telling me? >> i'm asking you. >> so you are on an expert. >> no, it was on the replay. >> so you saw it and you are an expert. >> yes. >> are you not an expert. >> i saw it. >> you are telling me i got my elbow up. >> it was on the replay. >> you are an expert, you know it was up. >> thank you. >> they went to mexico together.
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>> time for messages for greg. kickback and relax and feast your eyes on delightful landscapes as we bathe your ears with warm, soapy words. >> hey, greg. listen, man, i love ansley earhart as much as the next guy or gal or red eye viewer, but this breaking news has to stop! >> i noticed after your interview with the old spice guy and then gore's special was after that. anne coulter was not paying attention at all. it looked like she was on her cell phone and texting the old spice guy. didn't know if you noticed that. i still love anne coulter. >> my mom said i am not allowed to get massages from you anymore, and she wants your address. call me back. >> yeah, i'm not sure it is the web that's breaking up marriages. but i know one thing that sure it, and it is very accessible
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on the web, pornography. >> i live in san francisco, and a tip jar just went up at my cannibus club. >> as a raging metro sexual i find your metro comments very, very offensive. listen, i have perfectly moisturized face, skin, totally smooth everywhere. everywhere! and my tan is perfectly perfect. greg, you know what, i know that you get spray tanned. i know you do. >> greg, about the shoe throw in thing, my philosophy on that is if someone throws a shoe at you, smack them in the face with a cleat. maybe you should do it to bill. bye, greg. >> hi, greg, it is january. -- jan. i just wanted to say you are not short. you are fun sized. mmm. >> yes, i am fun sized, nice lady. keep calling me on my direct line 212-5050.
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to see clips of recent shows go to fox news .com slash red eye.
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time to go back to tv's andy levy for the post game wrap up. >> thanks, greg. joe, will you be in missouri at the end of the month? >> yes, sir, truman state u. it is on the college tour. it will be fun. come on out. a lot of great comics and me. >> that was a real upbeat pitch. >> it was a plug. it is gonna be great! >> there you go. >> fan it is! fantastic! >> and by the way, go fighting harries. >> diana, who do you have this week? >> john devore, the liberal that comes on here and paul the comedian. super fun pal talk .com slash
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diana. >> that's a lot of lips when paul is on between you and him. >> pat, you and the boys getting back on the road soon? >> we will do things around the united states until we go to europe in two weeks. so hopefully we will be able to get there with what's happening in iceland. >> what's happening in iceland? >> i didn't know what to do. >> neither did i. >> do you have anything to plug? >> i will plug my brother's run. it is called change for kids. thank you for throwing the website up there. log on and donate to jonathon shultz's run and make him have the highest donations at any of those crazy fun runners. he would appreciate it and i probably won't care. >> what would be awesome is when he over sleeps and doesn't show up. >> he probably will. he is a shultz. >> thank you, andy. always a plus, b

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