going to be in clemeson and angola, indiana and chicago. find out details at glenn beck.com. in new york, call me, by the way, call me. welcome to "red eye." it is like men in black if by black you mean leopard skin speedos. now to andy for a pre game report. andy, what's coming up on tonight's show? >> the woman who came up with the idea is forced to go to hiding. why we are living in the middle ages. and the national science foundation puts the nsf in the nsfw. and a new study says that women prefer chilled guys. our allstar panel will take a mellow look at the situation if it is cool with you. if not, no big. >> thank you, andy. >> i spinout of my wig. >> i am an inferior dog or mopping grel. >> i apologize for nothing. >> why should you?

i am here with fox news anchor jillian huddy. what are you wearing on your shoulder? >> what eskimo did you kill? >> somebody killed a raccoon on the way to work. >> i thought it looked nice. >> she is so nice heating blankets are now called huddy blankets. maybe that's what it is. if he were a slot machine i would pull him until i hit the jackpot. and my repulsive sidekick, bill shultz. he stinks of blisters and spit. and sitting next to merks the feminist comedian for the ages. if hilarity was italian sausage, i would grind him in a dark kitchen. >> glad you went there with that. >> and his greatest scoop is picking up dog poop. good to see you, pinch. >> crai see affleck -- kasey affleck says the joaquin phoenix flick was a complete fabrication. what's a joaquin?

>> lack luster. >> you are welcome. it is an immigrant's dream or an american ream? it is aimed at helping illegal immigrants become citizen. harry reid, aka margaret hamilton, says he will add it to the defense bill to be voted on by the senate next week. the illegals who came here before they were 16 would receive, quote, conditional permanent residency if they do two years of college or serve in the military. and once they do either they would get permanent legal residency with a chance to apply for citizenship. supporters of the act say it will help, but proponents call it backdoor amnesty. and they point out that regardless of what you call it, it still means people who came here illegally can get green cards ahead of others who play by the rules like this guy.

>> that is creepy. >> it is not creepy. he is not using weights. in these times of recession, he is using a resistance band. >> i am against it. >> should they go back to man bunny -- look. >> either love man bunny country or leave man bunny country. >> that was a russian woman speed skater from the 60s. >> he's going to come over here and reproduce like rabbits, and they will take our man buddy jobs. glad to have you back. it has been awhile. i am guessing you are a big fan of the dream act. >> well, it is not going to happen. it should be called the wet dream act. can i say that? >> yeah. >> he says boys and girls who come to our country -- who come to our country like they landed at j.f.k. and went to immigration and stopped at the boys and girls scouts of america and registered there. no, they climbed over or under a dirty fence. they are not boys and girls.

but this is political correctness which changes people's behavior through language. this is what this puts harry reid and obama, what they are all b. it is anti-military which is [bleep]. >> wow. >> i want to talk to you because about the military thing and the college thing, i want to know why you think it is anti-military. if people are willing to defend our country they should be able to jump the line. it is the two years of college that bugs me. it is basically giving them two years of partying. >> right. look, this legislative daring do i'm for. the ends justify the means, anything that allows us to document, monitor and tax illegals. it is a better strategy than digging moats. >> that's a good point. you are getting them through an avenue that they weren't there before, right? >> well, since you are both ganging up on me -- why do you

think it is anti-military? i didn't finish the whole article. these are illegals we are talking about. illegals going into the military? what after they go for amnesty? i don't understand the process. >> i think it is a positive experience to go into the military. that's the best way to learn about america. >> listen, they are illegal. can we start there? that's where i start. >> that's why they should go to the military. immigrants can behead the crap out of people. why not to our enemies? >> how about the mexican military? >> i wish. here is the thing, it is about documenting. if they love to be here, they can defend the country. i think that's just one way to prove they should stay here. >> we are treating them as though they were adults when they came in here. i understand the intention behind harry reid's action, but the fact is that all it

is, it is going to be another dangling carrot. get over the border. the man rabbits and it is all over. >> they are dangling carrots in one of your favorite bars. >> i keep asking for the stick. >> so they get to go to college on the taxpayer's dime. >> that's the other thing. i don't know about that. is that true? >> it is like rotc. we are paying for that. >> it doesn't fit in this half a paragraph you sent me. >> unfortunately these children are the victims of their parents' illegal actions. so their parents shouldn't be rewarded. >> you have kids? >> i have i will legitimate dears. -- daughters. >> i agree with john. the dream, you know the republican victory in the primary illustrate the problem

with the republican party. the dream illustrates the problem with the immigration policy. there is none. when you hear something where you can actually get people to write down their names and get them to come out of the darkness and sign up. >> how about you make them part of the military and put them on the border? >> you just solved the immigration problem. >> thank you very much. we're getting letters now. >> before i move on, i like the military aspect, but i don't like the college thing. >> i don't like the name. >> it sounds like cirque de soleil. it is a bunch of camouflage students. >> it is the end of a bachelorette party. >> these are liberal dreams. this is a harry reid dream. >> from illegals that profit to drawing the profits. did you see what i did there? cartoonist molly norris is paying the price for her joke.

the illustrator seen here with no eye -- >> oh my god! they are halfway there. >> she is no longer being published in city arts magazines or anier when else thanks to the everybody draw mohamed earlier this summer. and did the fbi recommend she go ghost thanks to what's going on against her. so she changed her name and wiped away her past identity. this is what she looks like now. i would hate for the muslim extreme mis think that's who it is. she retains her sense of humor telling g-men, quote, at least it will keep me from being so self-involved. like her positive outlook. more important, who wants to see a clean snake?

>> you are too awesome. back in the tub. >> we don't want to see a clean snake. >> was that gary by see -- gary busey's bathroom? >> here is the thing, she lives in washington. the last time i checked, if that is in the united states, how can a bunch of stupid cowards cause an american to hide in their own country? i don't get it. >> i read the story and in a way she is a free speech hero. this is an example where i would want to challenge my spiral dancing liberal friends. they should speak out in support of her. it is outrageous. liberals should allow some criticism of islam. these fundamental lists, it is amazing. they have shut her up.

>> she is not even criticizing. she is going against something. >> and she even said she was sorry. she ran and hid from these guys. >> did you see how she is hiding with the turbine and the mustache? >> bill, my theory is, they don't know what she looks like. why not say you are her? >> they were blocking it. she doesn't have delightful curls. >> i would also say that if this reallien senses them that much, give our troops a pen and paper and walk around of ghanistan with the cartoon and watch their heads explode. >> that's true. i can't believe i said that. you know the imam behind the mosque? why not score points and come out and defend her? >> this is the same guy that the other day made my skin crawl when he was on the air talking to, i don't know who, brian williams or somebody saying we should build the mosque. if we don't build the mosque

we will upset the fund mental lists. did you you know that before? >> her skin was crawling because she is going through withdraws. let's call it fair. >> i know, i haven't seen you in a couple days. >> don't worry, he brought you an eight ball. we are victims of extortion. we are at their mercy and have to worry about their feelings. >> this is what happens. read about the roman empire coming down. you know what will hit the fan. she has the cajones to say this? if you want to commit suicide, pills are easier. she's playing with fire, but i agree. we have to stand up. >> the mainstream muslims say they feel like they don't have a voice. well, here is your voice. >> i want to start a band called the mainstream muslims. >> how about everybody draws

yes, we moved up in the world. 5* palm beach state college last week, an administrator kicked "young americans of freedom" from the event. the objector says he didn't recall giving them permission to be there. but the group claims they had, and there is evidence. an e-mail from a student to beatty shows the call from off lil yaw. so it looks like ms. morris ford should lady up and tell the truth. but something tells me she won't. check out the video. >> you never called? >> no. >> don't you have an e-mail from her? >> i e mailed you and you

called me back. >> i don't remember that and i don't remember e-mail. if you can provide me an e-mail. >> i will provide you an e-mail. in the meantime, pull it up. >> you didn't write me back. you called me. >> no, i don't remember that. >> can i ask you a question, why are you upset about the stuff on our table? >> are you not authorized. >> according to her she said we were. >> sir, it does not matter. i asked you to move, move it now. jew and -- >> and the reason we are not authorized? isn't this how you start a club? >> when i told you i was starting a club and i was having difficulty. we planned this for today. we have been planning this for a longtime. >> i don't remember that. >> that's not the reaction i would expect at someone working at a place where open mindedness trumps oxygen. she knew she could bully the kids because her rudeness fell into the no worries they are

conservatives. if they were vegan nudists from obama, but she didn't like their views so she kicked them out. and it is a leftover reflex from my time at berkeley where i endured sloppy card tables with angry players. no one kicked them out because the pamphlets didn't talk about lunacy. if they did they would call security. there is only so much eek spuing truth to pow -- only so much speaking truth to power. john, you are a sensible comme pink-o. why can't academics sol rate a little opposition. you are a smart guy and can handle any argument. >> in the context of the woman, jerks, no race, creed or color?

>> i won't argue. jerks come in all forms. if we can do it with a pad and pen we will show uh yankee conference. >> and to your point, these are one of the great liberal pillars of influence. it is like asking me, why are all fund mental list christians weird closet case biggots? i don't know that's what they are. >> that's not fair. many have sex on the side. but then they go back. >> don't worry about it. i will be okay. i can see the fear in your eyes. >> we were only going to spend a few seconds on this. >> there is a reason i made it in here in time. i drove 140 i was so anxious. this lady should go back to her job at dmv making people cry in line.

but get used to the attitude this. is what you will deal with when obama care kicks in. you will deal with bureaucrats have say. >> if this were a liberal group it would have have all over the papers, right? >> yeah. and it wasn't in the palm beach post. the palm beach community college state -- whatever the hell the school is called. they were writing about it and talked about how the palm beach post hadn't noticed it. explain it, bill. >> you remember the young americans against freedom, and you are welcome at every campus. >> freedom, liberty, yuck. these kids have a legitimate gripe. but asking me to care that they have something else to be worried about, i am not going to care. >> the sweaters are harming a lot of people. >> they are. but republicans don't put out, greg.

i can't care about them. >> you don't know the right republicans. >> i guess. >> john gibson, wild times. wild times. he has a hot tub in hi hot tub. it is a small story but it is a microcoldocosim that talks about other stories. >> it has been going on forever. the famous left wing boom from the 60s said we will get you children and they did. >> he meant that literally. >> am i not right? >> i wouldn't know. >> you let it happen. how are we going to fight back? bob university? >> you can call how quickly this will go. >> i think so.

>> it just means conservatives are the new counter culture. i want to move on quickly because this is good. if you think that tension between me and bill is uncomfortable, check out this clip that is burning up the internet like an infection in charlie sheen's urinary track. john roberts appears to have gotten on the wrong side of hell and take it out on his co co-host. >> we are told be will see a more personal side of the president when he speaks this afternoon. here now with a preview is the senior advisor to president obama. he joins us live from the white house briefing room. david, thank you for being with us. let me ask you first of all, david, if i could, before we get into the -- excuse me. would you mind not doing that while i'm talking. thank you. you appreciate that. >> what do you think she was doing?

>> you took this out of context. yes. what was she doing? >> blackberry or making an omelettement. >> that's a euphemism. >> i knew karen. we used to work together. i like karen a lot. she is a very energetic, hyper girl. she was probably either texting or something like that. she is very hyper. i love her. >> bill, have to move on. >> that was awesome and enjoyed it thoroughly. nothing else to say. >> you know what i think happened was she just purchased a baby monkey and she was feeding it. she can't leave it at home because the monkey will destroy the uh apartent in. >> or maybe she was feeding the baby monkey to the giant pet python. >> we have to move. >> uncomfortable. >> what is it like to date three serial killers at the same time? julia huddy will tell us. >> i was wasted the whole

time. >> and who will speak for the bearded ladies of the world? we will speak for the bearded ladies of the world. also lizards. we like liz lizards.

it is a question older than questions themselves. are elves made of delicious gum drops? and do women prefer chill guys? do they prefer guys who love to live and love to surf and love hanging out while loving surfing? researchers from a crummy university in scotland -- why scotland? they had a group of fellows put on cortizole levels, those more chill, were rated a is more attractive than high strung dudes. so what does it mean? high cortosol can suppress reproductive functions and

women may prefer chill dudes because they are better breeding partners. sort of like this catch. [screaming] >> bill, you do it all the time, but never on a roller coaster. >> if you paned down you would have seen me. that didn't happen, mom. >> if you were to look up the definition of chill in the duckary it would read opposite of nick de paulo. >> do you really want something opposite of me? but it always comes from europe these anti-male studies. they always have the socialist dump over there. >> why anti-male?

>> because they say they may lose their temper 1k3* yell at their wives. >> getting upset there, buddy? >> a little. they say they prefer a french man. the aggressive guys get more work done, right? >> yeah. they build things. they build bridges. >> it is all about -- it is not anti-men as much as anti-science. this is not even women. >> what they are not women? >> they are not fully -- they are not mature women, no. >> they are college girls. >> i totally agree with this study. when women see these really aggressive type-a guys we think player. and then we think they are not going to be able to be loyal to us and treat us well. and then we usually end up when we are younger and then we decide as we get older -- >> go for the male

hairdresser. >> you want a guy that is law bought myselfed. they say the women prefer a passive guy. >> not gay men. it is guys that are calm. >> you want guys that go with the flow and may or may not look like shirley from law vern and shirley and possibly wear cool t-shirts. >> where did that come from? >> i don't know. i am so chilled out right now i can't even hear you. >> guys with long hair and stains. >> you are getting angrier. >> i am not. that's why i called it anti-male traits. >> ease on down the road for a second. we are all human beings. >> it is in praise of they mass skew lated male. >> somebody breaks into your house in the middle of the night. do you want a guy that's laid back? i'm so chill i have been

mistaken for dead. >> i have to say we live in a -- we have two chill generations in a row, don't we? people that are like -- they are not emotional about anything. >> we don't have enough chill. serve so outraged we need some -- we have overmedicated generations. >> are you overmedicated? no you are chill. i wouldn't date you. >> no, you would marry me. >> it has all gone to hell. >> you are right, it is paxil,. >> just like i said, it is like ritalin. >> and ritalin is more than for little boys. can't em pho sighs that enough. do you have a comment on the show? i hope so. e-mail us at red eye at fox news .com. to leave an e-mail go to red

eye at fox news .com.

welcome back. let's find out if we've got anything wrong so far. for that we go to andy levy. what do you have besides a large section of submarines in your apart meant? >> i have a question for you. >> really? >> as you know i have bronchitis, and you kindly

sent over a house boy stew. >> yes. >> did i detect a slight hint of poco? >> yes, yes. yeah you didn't find a toe ring, did you? >> no. >> then it was paco. >> dream act, nick you say it isn't going to happen meaning it won't pass, and you may be right. harry reid is attaching this to the defense authorization bill. in other words the defense budget. if he is successful in attaching it, if you want to vote to fund the troops and give the pentagon the budget you have to vote for this too. >> good point. >> that's what i meant to say. >> that means it probably is not going to pass. >> it is possible. what you are saying to people is if they want to vote against this, they have to vote against the defense budget and guess what.

they don't care about the troops. >> you know what will pass? >> paco's tow running. -- toe ring. >> if i am a congressman i will tack on stuff that is cool for me. i want a water slide in my backyard. if you don't pass it, you don't pass the defense bill. >> it used to be they didn't do it with the defense budget. because they couldn't find another way to suck more they do this. >> andrew. andrew! >> congress sucks. >> andrew elizabeth levey, i do not like this attitude whatsoever. >> john, i don't disagree saying this is a case of the ends justifying the means. the flip side is that at the end of the day -- an expression i hate -- you are rewarding people for breaking the law. >> pragmatically speaking, no. a solution is better than no shogs solution. if america is upset with fairness, our country would be different. this is a praying mat i can it solution i support. >> are you a pragmatic

solution. >> greg you said if you serve in the military may it is okay. but you poo-pooed some of it. don't you think it is as essential to learning to be an american? >> prap. -- perhaps. it is two years of pooh poohing. >> the people who make it here are hard workers, we all know that. i think the military as you know makes better people. partying doesn't make you a better person. it just makes you an older and sadder person. a self-of yourself. nick, it is not that the illegals went to college on the taxpayers' dime. but they would be able to go to state schools which are funded by taxpayers. >> i was reading that on the card. >> i don't want excuses, nick.

>> you are talking to the wrong guy, man. >> and cartoonist meant to go into hiding. john, good point, why are all your friends believing this? >> the cartoonist made 5* statement, and she is being punished for it on her own dime too. the government isn't paying for her going ghost. and she should be a hero. on the flit -- political side, sometimes the wires you can't cross them. the liberals can't reconcile that this religion can have negative elements. >> in the future i need shorter answers. >> yes, sir. >> by the way, my session for this is now that it is out there she change her identity and go into hiding. she should just stay at her old house with her old name. >> the new girl that just

moved in. i am the no the old girl. >> ironically, she could be at home watching "ghost." >> i'm running out of time. greg-alogue, kicked out of college event. of course, john, not all fundamental lists are bigots and/or closet cases. >> sorry. >> but you are being coy. 85%. send your tweets to at john daw sror. women prefer chill guys. you read the study wrong. women prefer a house part and dallas star. different story. >> chill. >> i don't know i don't know how you can say it is anti-science. it talks about cortosol levels. >> tu shea. >> i agree with you. i don't know why they think it is anti-mouth.

>> are you talking to me? >> i think it would be a great show. >> and bill, i have to say as the only woman on the panel i thought your commentary was excellent on this. >> i would say if that's the case i am a chill woman, and none of this huddy thing is working unless she is a lesbian. >> i am definitely not. >> i love how you can't em phasize that enough. >> i'm done. >> are you really? >> go away then. the woman hement to seek -- he meant to seek, turned out to be a freak, but her facial fuzz didn't kill his buzz. a kansas city man uh adopted at a young age and set out to find his biological mom. he found her at a circus in bakersfield, california. working as a sideshow bearded lady. she is vivien wheeler and she has "wear wolf syndrome." that would be nice. hey, you have wear wolf

syndrome. she is also a huh maf raw dite. lauren's father met her in nebraska and took her son away afterbirth. now they are reunited after 33 years. this is a beautiful story. and not only that -- it is a beautiful story. >> it is, it is. >> and she informed him he has a brother. >> when they show an interest in the water that's when we introduce the bath. >> we have a lot of bathtub -themed things. nick, if you were the son and you went back to your mom, would you be over joyed or distraught? >> if the closest i could come is a snap shot, i am calling the search off there. i know a little about this. i am italian and i have three sisters. it skips a

generation. i have a niece and she has a full goatee. it is embarassingment she comes up to bat in little league and the crowd all chants. it is the wolf blitz syndrome. >> my gosh. do you think this guy is somewhat relieved when he discovered it? >> he dodged a developmental bullet. he didn't grow up with santa -- santa claus p now he can come back. at least he didn't grow up being raised -- >> he was raised by the circus. >> you get to see a lot of the country. >> actually, we were talking in the green room when you were sobing about whatever problem and you said you envy this guy because his parents were famous. >> well, yes. you always want a celebrity.

it is like, you got a celebrity. may i just say quickly -- you know what would be better? charles mann son. >> she doesn't want to save her face. she is a very confident woman. she got screwed on the dna in someways. we look at she is a strong woman and the strength and character. >> oh, whatever. >> i kind of gree with juliette. what a great story to pick up chicks with. your mom is the bearded lady. he can get into any carnival she is at across the country. >> it is easy to jump those fences, greg. carnival is not the height of security. >>less year you got hind legs and fried turkeys. >> do two years at the carnival and then come in. >> it is another euphemism the. >> if this is not a cautionary

tale about what you may find if you search for your uh adoptive parents. it is great until i found out he is my mom. he's my mom. why don't you pan in when i do that? >> he's my mom! >> a little too late for that, don't you think? coming up, why is starting fires so much fun? juliette huddy explains. plus, holy cow, are those blurred websites. must be a story about blurred public websites, or maybe it is about poverty. i don't care any are month.

it is x rated, unabated and, yeah, masterbated. despite promising last year to crackdown on federal employees looking at porn, the national science foundation, my

favorite science foundation is against facing questions about whether workers are working for sleeve on our dime. on tuesday senator charles grassley sent a letter saying he heard from three unnamed whistleblowers about persistent porn problems. in one case, an exec who spent time looking at illicit website helps provide a living to impoverished women overseas. they say those days are over, they fixed the problem, much like this dog has ices ifed it problem. -- much like this dog has fixed its problem. >> get them. good girl. >> right before that he was crushed. in fairness, about you loons suck so i am -- balloons suck, so i am with the dog. viewing porn helps women

overseas, do you buy that? >> i have done it many times and many hours. can you blame these guys? science was the most boring topic in high school. i was caught with the blowup doll. this is good. these guys are secular science guys. this is the way you create creationism. not bad? >> john, the foundation uses software that uh tempts to access porn. does this software scare you? >> not at all. i don't need to watch porn because i live it. i am all for being -- -- >> you mean you are a severely depressed person? >> i have a raging meth habit. bureaucrats are watching porn and buyer row cat can do no

harm. >> that's a con cive tiff per -- a conservative bumper sticker. >> what is the name? >> john devo re. >> were all of these unnamed whistleblowersment to be women? >> men don't talk to other men about porn. >> greg, do you think they were women or men. that's an slept question. i don't know. >> do they -- i don't know. i don't know. you men are so creepy. >> i'm the chill one. >> do you know how much they spent on making sure this stuff does happen. what would fox news find on your computer besides jewel. >> that's it. i don't know how to use. it i sit there and look at it and i drool. >> you buy frint and put it on top. i want to fit in.

>> you put the magazine on top of the computer. >> you look at the study and you think, well, republican nominee for senate was right. that's the first thing i thought. and then i started doing a search for porn stars that looked like her. i will send you links. >> we have all the porn use, can't reharness to guy to make alternative electricity? >> people on bicycles are generating and all of these guys touching themselves, put them together and they can write down alternative engines. they are looking at me like i am crazy. >> you hold the key in your hand my friends. >> scientists and money crunchers. we are taking a break. when we return more stuff. yeah there.

it is time for messages for greg. that's me. kickback, relax and feast your eyes on a horse and a ball as we bathe your ears with warm, soapy words. >> are you saying there is a survey that says stat man, and i will buy that.

i am supposed to be obese, and i consider 7 minutes total? i kissed longer than seven minutes. i mean 70 minutes i have bonn df. an hour and a half. seven minutes? i kiss for seven minutes. >> being out of yogurt makes life not worth living. when i run out of yogurt it is worse than running out of reefers. >> it is 4:00 in the morning and i have an 8:00 class. bill shultz you are [bleep]. greg, you are awesome and i stay up way too late to watch you every night. buddy, if you think that guy was funny, watch the ed shultz show on msnbc any night of the week. that guy is a nut job. >> greg, it is me again. it is 2:41.

i didn't mean what i said about bill. i think he is metro though. >> greg, the republicans are treating me like a dog. like a socialist. >> is that the greatest video ever? >> riveting. >> how does it work? >> you are going to see the shape of an ab rocket. >> keep calling me, 212-462-505 are have. we will close things out with the post game wrap up with tv's andy levy. and to see clips of recent shows,

tune in same night tomorrow night. our "red eye" guest will be sc-cupp. terry shaford and criminal defense attorney remy spencer.

>> time to go back to tv's andy levy for the post game wrap up. >> i know you have a birthday coming up soon. what do you want? >> to book glen hanserd on the show. >> this is not a dating show. >> he is have funny and great performer. >> she wants the rest of her coat. >> i love you. >> nick, are you going to be per rm toking anywhere soon? >> yes, funny you ask. i sent that e-mail earlier. foxwood's casino october 21, 22, and 23. indians included. >> is that with norton? >> no. i have to ask you, in aned code of luis you got into a fight and he kicked your ass. >> that's because it is his show and he wrote it.

if i had to be in the show he would be. >> he and ron howard arm wrestle a lot. >> he nearly killed glen howard. >> don't get me started. >> johnny, when is my deadline for that premiere .com article? >> that would have been like three weeks ago. >> seriously? >> yeah. how are you feeling? >> alt sickly. >> he had a bad cuff. >> i have. >> bill any hoda update. >> indeed, hoda tweeted not just this morning asking how much sleep i get on a daily basis. i don't know what that meant. hoda, we will go do some red eye cynergy and a lovely dinner. >> call me. don't do it. he's crazy. >> he has killed four morning hosts in the last few years. >> all wearing partial coats. >> nothing to worry about.