>> stephen: you don't get that gig without -- >> -- and she'll say, no, that would never happen. >> stephen: what have you done that would never happen? >> oh, i have been blown up, already, season one. >> stephen: well, you look fabulous! >> thank you. >> stephen: you're also a mother. >> yes. >> stephen: would you rather negotiate as secretary of state with vladimir putin or with teenagers? because they can be like terrorists. (laughter) >> yes, it's true. i think i could negotiate with putin because i have teenagers. (applause) >> stephen: they're >> yes. i have a 13-year-old boy. putin's a breeze. >> stephen: exactly. yeah. >> stephen: i understand that your son sort of convinced you to take this gig. he said, mom, you've got to go get out of the house or what was it? (laughter)

years and he said, you know, i've got this -- he's 12 at the time -- >> stephen: i'd like you to leave. >> yes. >> stephen: in essence, it was, listen, go back, get out there, you know? >> stephen: i want this for you, mom! >> yes! and i took that as i thought that was a very beautiful moment between us and i said, okay, here i go! you know, and i did. i returned. you know, you have your ups and your downs. it's hard. you work these kind of hours and -- actually, i thought it was going very well, i will tell you this, until halloween, and my son, i said, so, baby, what halloween? he's not too old. he said, i'm going to be an old-fashioned lobster. (laughter) and the first thought, i good. i thought, oh, my god, i'm not there!

(laughter) , like, this is a disaster! and this rage of guilt, like, i'm always working and clearly it's probably coke! (laughter) and i'm thinking and then i'm running and driving home and running it through my mind -- an old fashioned lobster, there will be the oven mits, that part's obvious. what's the rest of this thing going to be? and i walked in and he was an old fashioned mobster! (laughter) (applause) >> stephen: did you tell him you thought lobber? >> no. >> stephen: no? don't ever tell him you thought lobster. >> i won't and he's not watching because he's not impressed. >> stephen: good. he's going to go, is she smoking dope? (laughter) stick around, i'd love to talk to you a little bit more. we'll be right back with more tee a leoni.

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(cheers and applause) >> stephen: we're back with the lovely and talented tee a leoni! (cheers and applause) i understand one week from tonight you are turning 50 years old. congratulations. >> no, no, no. >> stephen: what? i'm turning 59. >> stephen: you're turning 59 years old? wow! wow! well, i mean, still congratulations, but -- i mean you look great for any age, but amazing! (laughter) >> here's the thing... i've figured out that women lie about their age. you should not lie about your age. but they lie the wrong way! (laughter)

to turn 59? >> no. >> stephen: you're actually turning 50? >> maybe. my point is -- >> stephen: so the point is -- if you lie like women going the wrong way -- >> stephen: so, say i'm turning 40. >> well, if you're turning 40, you look like crap. (laughter) >> stephen: yes. and if i say, i'm turning 59, people are like, wow! you look pretty good for 59! >> stephen: well you look pretty good for any age! (cheers and applause) >> thank you. >> stephen: did i understand your plan was not to be an actress that this was sort of a happy accident, that you were going to be an anthropologist? >> yes. >> stephen: there is a lot of different anthropology. were you going to study native peoples? >> yes! >> stephen: really? and i was very, very good at it. >> stephen: you were good at anthropology? >> i was good at it. >> stephen: oh, man, i have

i can deal! do you want to anthropolojize? >> let's do it. >> stephen: i totally get your tribal crap! >> you are so wrong! >> stephen: what kind of anthropology? >> well, yes, that sort of classic anthropology. i was doing it in college, i was very good at it. >> stephen: so why didn't you go for it? >> i was going to go for it and then my dad said to me, before you become an anthropologist, you should go to a cocktail party with a bunch of anthropologists. (laughter) >> stephen: what does that mean? >> that was my first thought. oh! you know, academics -- no offense -- but it was sort of -- i wasn't really cut out -- >> stephen: so you went to a cocktail party?

there is no craigslisting for anthropologists. so you hunted down these people -- >> no, i got it. i knew what he meant. i was mad because i thought i found it. >> stephen: so your fall-back position was actress? that was the safe choice? >> no, that was just a little trick i played on my dad. but i think the advice that he gave me, he said, don't do something because you're good at it. do it because you're passionate about it and you will get good at it. and that was really smart. that was great advice. (cheers and applause) so i don't know, i mean, i still to this day -- >> stephen: yep. i didn't think i would make a better anthropologist than an actor. >> stephen: yeah? give me a favorite not your culture that you grew up in that interests you. >> the tiwi indians of new guinea. >> stephen: i knew immediately, yeah, yeah. (laughter) you would have been an extremely sexy anthropologist.

have. >> thank you. >> stephen: you could have played yourself later. (laughter) tee a, thank you so much for being here. >> thank you for having me. >> stephen: been a pleasure. thank you guys. >> stephen: "madam secretary" airs sundays at 8:00, 7:00 central on cbs. tee a leoni is 73 years old, everybody! we'll be right back! with advil, you' ll ask what backache? what sore wrist? what headache? what bad shoulder? advil makes pain a distant memory. nothing works faster stronger or longer than advil it' s the world' s #1 choice. what pain? advil. don't use windex to make

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(cheers and applause) >> stephen: welcome back. my next guest is now starring in "togetherness" on hbo. (baby crying) >> what happened! what is this? oh, god. (screaming) >> stephen: please welcome amanda peet! (cheers and applause) (cheers and applause) >> stephen: what an amazingly beautiful dress. >> thank you. >> stephen: it looks like it's

it's amazing. >> it's like a big quilt. a big doily. >> stephen: it's lovely. yeah, i should just stop talking. >> stephen: no, you have to keep talking for the next seven minutes. >> right. >> stephen: i'm a huge fan of yours and i really love the show. >> i'm a huge fan of yours. >> stephen: that's very nice. we can keep this up for the next seven minutes and i will be happy as a clam. >> bore everyone to death. >> stephen: you have kids of your own. >> i have three kids which is sort of like three million kids. >> stephen: are you going to go for a fourth? >> what! >> stephen: you're already in zone defense. you're already maximally inconvenienced, so go for a fourth. >> no! i'm 44 years old. i'm actually 44. (cheers and applause) >> stephen: tee stay 85 years old! >> wow! she looks hot! >> stephen: she moisturizes! amazing! gotta get some of that!

have any more children. >> stephen: you just had a one-year-old. >> and by the skin of his teeth he made it here! he's a miracle baby. >> stephen: skin of your teeth is not how you make a baby. (laughter) i don't want to shock anybody. i'll write it down for you. see, you get the thing and thing goes like that, yeah, that's how it works. that's exactly how it works. kind of works that way. anyyin way, we'll have this up on the web site later. (laughter) just click the "i'm over 18" button. i didn't know. you could have adopted. i don't know. >> i have a really bad cough. >> stephen: do you want a ricola? >> sure! >> stephen: ricola! (laughter) there you go. you know, you could just tear

(applause) there you go. i haven't touched it. there you go. there you go. glamour. >> what happened? >> stephen: we're just having fun! we're just having fun! (blowing noise) (laughter) >> stephen: your illustrious husband is one of the creators of "game of thrones." >> yes. >> stephen: do you ever want to be on that show? >> yes, i do. >> stephen: i want to be on that show, too. >> are you serious? >> stephen: i haven't watched much, i'm reading the books. i'm saving it till i read all of it. my kid was in the room and i said, i can't watch that. what do you want to be on the show? >> a swordswoman. >> stephen: okay. (laughter) >> what do you want to be? >> stephen: i want to die a really horrific death! >> me, too! >> stephen: i want to die like this, going, please, my lord, no!

>> stephen: blood gurgling out of my body. >> should we do it? >> stephen: we could fight together on the show. >> and maybe david would put you on the show. >> stephen: that would be fun. can you die with an english accent? >> stephen: please, me lord! that's good (applause) >> stephen: that's good enough, come on! you're on another hbo show called "togetherness." i love that show. your character, a lot of these people are in mid-life crises in their 40s. >> yes. >> stephen: you have a lovely life. what do you know from the mid-life crisis. is this a stretch for you? >> no! >> stephen: you don't look like a person in crisis to me. >> i -- you know, 44 is really -- it's quite something. how come all the women on the show are talking about their ages tonight? >> stephen: i don't know

so what was your crisis? >> well, it's ongoing. >> stephen: i'm catching you mid crisis right now? >> yes. but you know how some men hit middle age and get a motorcycle? well, i had a baby. >> stephen: okay. henry is my little motorcycle. >> stephen: that's lovely. he keeps me -- >> stephen: what do you worry about? mid life crisis -- >> i fear death. >> stephen: death? yes. >> stephen: okay. well, we all die. >> right. >> stephen: keep it light. we all die. (laughter) it's a late-night talk show, keep it light. maybe you will die and go to heaven. >> that's where i need help because you're catholic and i'm jewish so we're the same. (laughter) >> stephen: yes, catholics are the jews of christianity. (laughter) (applause)

so what do you sneed? i need to know what to believe in. >> stephen: what happens when you die? >> yes, i don't want to be a bag of dust! i want to haunt my children! you're marrying who?! you did what?! like that, i want david and laura to be ghosts -- >> stephen: like beetle juice! (laughter) i don't know what happens. i kind of want the perily gates and all that. >> that's what i want! >> stephen: i want classic. give me classic coke heaven is what i want. >> yes. >> stephen: i had a dream that i died and i go to heaven and this really happened, i go to heaven and heaven, instead of crossing the river, you had to cross a really nice hollywood pool and a row boat pulled by dwayne the rock johnson! (applause) (laughter)

was worried do they have diet coke in heaven? because i really have a diet coke problem. >> this is really not inspirational. >> stephen: not helping? this is lovely. so nice to have you here. please come again when you're feeling well. (laughter) can i shake your hand and put some purelle on it? (laughter) >> stephen: season two of "togetherness" premieres this sunday on hbo. amanda peet, everybody! we'll be right back. (cheers and applause) unlimited soup or salad starting at just $6.99 think of it as a quesadilla that speaks fluent italian

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,, ,, ,, (cheers and applause) >> stephen: welcome back. my next guest is one of america's leading canine comedians, now re-inventing himself as a political commentator. >> hey, one question! over here!

is it true you tried to shut down the government so you could go to a nickerback concert? >> no way! all right, i'm never going to get to thism/vt i've got a better idea. (laughter) up here! you can't wait forever! >> stephen: please welcome triumph, the insult comic dog. (cheers and applause) >> thank you very much! thank you! thank you! >> stephen: thanks for being here. >> it's my pleasure! how's the show going? >> stephen: well, haven't you been watching it?

i was schtooping a terrier backstage. i do it every time. i got it from bill mar. >> stephen: thank you. i'm hulu, ladies and gentlemen! hulu! (applause) >> all your favorite network shows with all your favorite commercials as well! hulu! >> stephen: you've got great reviews! >> i've gotten amazing reviews! >> stephen: fantastic reviews. incredible, everywhere! >> stephen: is it because the show's good or are you bribing these guys? >> wait a minute! after i get a great review, i send a nice critic a photo from my stash of dog porn. >> stephen: you've sent these photos to critics who said nice

this is somebody from the new york star ledger. >> alan steanwolf. he was great. >> stephen: here's from a blorg. >> yes, the decider. it was an excellent review. >> stephen: this one you said judd app apatow -- >> he said my show was hilarious. >> stephen: you're trying to be an honest-to-god journalist now? >> exactly. >> stephen: you're covering the campaign as if you were a >> yes. >> stephen: but the jokes you're doing are pretty low >> really! just think, millions of tvs are tuned in to the show now because the whole show fell asleep during elementary. >> stephen: you've gotten into other people. are there any other people who have dropped out of the race who

>> yes, i interacted with a lot of them in the special but since then chris christie's dropped out. i'm sorry about that. >> stephen: yes, last week. i'm worried. now that he's not running for president. i'm worried chris christie might let himself go. (laughter) even though he's out of the race, he still has a $100,000 a plate dinner scheduled. tomorrow at denny's by himself! (laughter) that's a joke i don't make anymore. that's a new journalist triumph! >> stephen: what about carly. i never got to meet carly face to face. >> stephen: what about sanders? >> bernie 2016, that's crazy. the man doesn't look a year over 2000!

you're taking this job seriously. have you done your research. >> are you kidding me?! have i not done my research? uh do you realize i went to iowa, new hampshire, i studied every candidate, read every one of their books. >> stephen: every book? every book. would you like to see them? >> stephen: yes, i would. here's a book i read. i read donald trump, he's making history with his updated new book pride and prejudice now with more prejudice by donald trump. (applause) florida governor jeb bush. he still hopes he will be the next president of 1600 penn. read about his vision for the country in leading to courage -- you're not going to show it? his vision for the country,

freedom, future (bleep). i'm jeb bush! i did my research! let no one say i did not do my research! >> stephen: "triumph's election special 2016" is now streaming on hulu. we'll be right back. (cheers and appl,,

,, ,, ,, ,, (cheers and applause) >> stephen: that's it for "the late show." tune in tomorrow when my guests will be chelsea handler, star of "girls" zosia mamet, and a musical performance by the lumineers.

corden. good night! (cheers and applause) captioning sponsored by cbs captioned by media access group at wgbh access.wgbh.org >> reggie: are you ready to have some fun feel the love tonight don't you worry 'bout your hang-ups and fears

it's the late, late show >> ladies and gentlemen, all the way from raleigh durham north carolina, give it up for the one, the only james corden! >> james: thank you very, very much. thank you. good evening. welcome to this, your "late, late show." thanks for being here, guys. thank you so much. cheers. thank you for being here. and ladies and gentlemen, while advicitying mexico yesterday pope francis stated that he did not think that donald trump is a true christian because of trump's belief on immigration. i know you're thinking there

the next season of celebrity apprentice. do you know how wrong you have to be for a pope to dislike you. i mean the pope's entire thing is lit reallily forgiveness. pope john paul hung out with the guy who tried to assassinate him and now pope francis is like, i can't with this trump guy. i can't. trump fired back saying the pope will wish donald trump were president if the vatican is ever attacked. i have to say, the on time i think people will wish trump was president is if ted cruz is president. (laughter) but it's really not hard to pick a side in this feud. (applause) it isn't hard to pick a side in this feud. in fact, i think this is the first time even atheists are like, you're going to-- you know i'm going to take the pope's side. a in a historic move, he also suggested that it might be

ception in order to prevent the spread of the zika virus. and that's not surprising to me because once you start debating with donald trump, birth control starts to seem like a pretty good idea. but trump is clearly getting under the pope's skin. because earlier in the week the pope actually got angry when someone pulled his robe at an event and caused him to cash into a man in a wheelchair, right. and we have footage of him falling. and you can actually pinpoint thek exact moment when pope francis forgets that he's the pope. there, there it is. right there. that's when he went from pope francis to pope frankie. you couldn't hear the dialogue in the video but i'm guessing it's probably something like what the frick, man. you stinken joking me pushing me

wheelchair? i mean what the fuj. i meerch he was annoyed but i will say what is crazy is that right after the pope got off him, the guy in the wheelchair was able to walk. it is a miracle. it is a "late, late show" miracle. shall we have a look and see who our guests are on the show tonight? one of the actors you know from community and the brilliant new series "love," the incredibly talented gillian jacobs is here. how are you? >> i'm so well. thank you for having me. >> james: nice to sigh. are you well? >> i'm very well, i would say, better than well. >> james: that's good. are we better than well. >> we're well good. >> james: you're better than well, he's well good. it looks like it's going very well am gillian jacobs, everybody. in the purple roomk we have one of the stars of comedy central's workaholics and the new movie how to be single, he's so funny,

anders holm is here tonight. (applause) >> hey. >> james: how are you? >> pretty good. >> james: what was that, what. >> hollywood breathe mints. >> james: oh, really. >> next level. >> james: so you don't swallow them, you just projectile them out and your breathe smells incredible. >> that's hollywood. >> james: we disn know it would be this new, thank you for being here, anders holm, everybody. and in the red room tonight, he is a yahoo global news anchor. she's america's sweetheart, we're so happy that she's here. the one, the only, katie couric is here tonight. (applause) >> hi, jaims, how are you. >> james: very, very well. i'm slightly worried that you are here again. because i seem to remember this. the last time katie was here, things went a little bit wrong for me personally. we can remind everyone of it

katie did this. [bleep]. >> up here, james. >> james: i mean, you have nothing planned tonight, right? >> nothing planned. honestly, every time i watch that clip i feel so bad. because i feel like you really almost had a heart attack. and i wanted to milk it a little bit longer. >> james: did you. out. >> james: yes. well, i hope there is nothing planned. thanks for being here. katie couric, everybody. all right, reg, you ready to do. this he's reggie watts, i'm james corden. and this is the "late, late show," roll the titles. captioning sponsored by cbs the late, late show, oh, oh

the late, late show, oh, oh the late, late show oh, oh the late, late show the "late, late show" >> james: also later on the snow show we have got a real treat coming up, has everyone seen this huge movie deadpool, the biggest move ye in the world right now. after the break we have a big sketch with mr. deadpool himself. mr. ryan reynolds. coming right up. something. i saw this thing online today. and i can't get over it. i see reg, are you a prince fan, a fan of prince, i'm talking about the prince, not just the random son of a king and a queen. >> yeah, mega. you played with prince, right. did you, when did you play with him. >> in paris. >> yes. >> james: with prince. >> yeah. >> james: an look where it took you.

do you know what i mean. >> james: so this thing came out today with prince. his passport, he just got a new passport photo. and someone shared it on twitter, recently. and it does not disappoint. it basically looks exactly what you would imagine prince's passport photo looks like, in your head, right. so i've got it here. look at that. for a passport photo. you have ever-- it is majestic. like i know you're not meant to smile but that doesn't mean you should be allowed to exude that much sexual energy. the picture immediately changes from a passport to like a lifetime membership to the mile high club. he's on the no fly list, he's on the two-fly list. look at his facial hair. imagine how long that takes am look at his faiks hair, reg, look at that, just around the lips, not even here, just like a

>> reggie: it's vaguely there. >> james: yeah. >> reggie: like a brazilian for your face. >> james: does prince even need a passport? i feel like he could just walk on to a plane and they will be like hey, we were going to cincinnati, but where do you want to go. where do you want to be? you know what i mean. this got us thinking. we were looking at this and we thought every celebrity needs a passport some of we did some digging. we actually found a few more celebrity passport photos to show you. this is-- here's bernie sanders right there, there he is. it's actually got a stamp from the titanic. this is taylor swift a passport, just there. (laughter) we wanted to-- (applause). >> james: we actually wanted to show you kayne's passport as tidal. we did manage to get our hands

here it is there. that is not actually a gif, it is a still image. your eyes are making it do that. finally it wouldn't be fair to show other people's passport photos without showing you mine. so this is mine right here. there i am. there is he. sweet baby james. you know. i need to get back to the gym but that's pretty much me. we have a fun show. we'll be right back with a brand

,, ,, >> i love that. i love that, reg strks some phenomenal moves, what just happened. >> reggie: it felt lawrence welshish. >> james: there it is, now guys as you probably all know marvel's deadpool is such a huge success and smashed all sorts of box office records. yesterday the star of the film ryan reynolds came on our show to talk about it. i took the opportunity to pitch some thoughts of my own about

take a look. >> yo. there he is. king of the screen. i'm good, how are you doing? >> what can i do for you? >> well, it's actually not what you can do for me, it's what i can do for you. listen, everything that is happening, deadpool. >> crazy. >> james: huge, right, it's incredible. i watched it. i loved it. i couldn't help but feel it's missing something. side kick. >> deadpool doesn't really have a side kick. deadpool is sort av solo act. >> james: that is what is weird about. everything watching, i'm loving the film, but where the side kick, every superhero has a side kick. superman. >> doesn't have one. >> james: spiderman. >> no. >> james: sea biscuit with a jockey, so that in turn makes it a side kick.

one of the biggest openings in marvel history. >> james: one of the biggest openings, yawn.com. i'm saying let's take this to the next level. just let me present you with some side kicks. if it doesn't work, what is the harm. but i think you'll be surprised. >> okay. >> what is it? >> iceman, the iceman comet. >> was' happening. >> james: that is what he say, the iceman comet, comet the hour, comet d comeeth the iceman, all over you. >> that is so stupid. >> james: well, you're stupid. no worries. >> okay wa, do you do? >> james: i have a really, really short fuse.

>> i don't understand. >> james: like i go-- i'm open >> right. what else does he do? james? no. >> james: all i'm saying is you don't do this, marvel will, all right. they've made that quite clear. they think potatoe man is its own entity. >> oh, who. >> james: matthew marvel. he doesn't deal with negative people like you. get it? the magic clown. absolutely no idea. i don't know. i was hoping you would help me with this one. >> no. >> james: why is it me who is coming up with all of the ideas, we're in this together. i need you to help me with this. are you better than this, ryan t is actually disappointing.

>> james: i don't want to be a side kick, so-- i didn't say that, i didn't mean that. i do want to be a side kick, i do. i will get another costume. wait there. >> what is that? >> james: tends to kicialtion i intend to il can what time is it, oh, it's tens to kill. >> that doesn't mean make sense. >> james: you don't make sense. >> i'm not standing in a giant scwid outfit. >> james: it's an octopu s so without looks stupid now. >> i don't want to disappoint you or anything like that, but this isn't going to work and the main reason is because these are awful. >> james: okay. i appreciate your time. i'm a big fan. >> james. i do have one idea that may work.

open up the door . >> deadpool. (cheers and applause) what? >> feets good, huh? >> james: yeah, deadpool, double deadpool. >> let's get out of here. >> coming soon. >> james: how do you go to the bathroom in this thing. >> oh, you just do. hard to do it in a-- . >> james: i'm going now. (cheers and applause) swrz how great is ryan reynolds. we love him. everybody, go and see deadpool, it's out now. it was brilliant. we'll be right back with gillian jacobs and and and-- anders

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