tv Jimmy Kimmel Live ABC February 28, 2016 11:05pm-12:07am CST
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tomorrow morning! all members of the academy who are eligible are invited to vote their nominations for best picture. in most other categories, the nominations are decided by a vote of the members working in that specific category. then the entire membership chooses from those nominations the recipients of the oscars. and finally, the results of all the secret voting are known only to the independent accounting firm of pricewaterhousecoopers
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ambassador to filmmakers and production companies, both large and small. she gave us a tour ofofhe state historical l seum's "hollywood in the heartland" exhibit, detailing the film industry's storied past in iowa. "when people call, for instance, like when the bachelor came and shot here in our state, they first contacted me, and then i put together team of people to help them." "it's all about television, the internet, the whole industry haha changed so much and it''actually a very exciting time for filmmakers and media producers right now."and she says their presence in iowa has only gotten stronger since 2009. cedar rapids native adam orton is one of those filmmakers, who decided to come back and create something here after attending college in chicago. he directed the summerland project, which tells a story of thehe moral dilemmas associated with artificial intelligence, and what it means to be human. 15:38-:52 "the amount of support and interest we've had from people, ananlocal
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and communities; it's been exciting to see peoples' reactions and get peoples' help for making something like this."he shot about 95 percent of the movie in iowa, with some pickup shots in los angeles. aside from some members of the main cast, orton says just about ull of the extras in the fi are from iowawa he says the response his crew got for open casting calls is proof iowans are excited to be a part of the process. 16:25-:32 "people definitely want to support artists here, and people jump at the opportunity to do something creative like that."there are no longer any tax incentives available to filmmakers or producers in iowa, but orton says there are other benefits to workinin here. 17:12-:20 " " lot of film productions are finding that places outside of los angeles, jt in general, are cheaper."gilma n says production companies are also on the lookout for big, iowa- centric events that provide unique opportunities. the iowa caucuses are
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"that played a backdrop for a lot of other productions. we had showtime here, they were filming an episode of the circus, we had hulu here filming another episode, so you never know what you're going to see in iowa."iowa's small towns, rolling hills, and farm fields are another attraction for location scouts. they're showcased in baseball films like 2007's the final season, and perhaps most famously, field of dreams. "when kevin costner was here last summer and i got to talk to him, and asked him why do people film here? and he said the light. he said you can't replicate this light, this natural beauty and the natural light we have here."orton says a revival of tax credit incentives would likely attract more large-scale, big-budget films. 20:02-:11 "we're seeing it right now in places like atlanta, which a lot of people in my community are calling the second hollywood now."but he believes enenuraging films on a cultural level is more important, to create an environment where young and aspiring filmmakers can grow their talents. 20:54-:58 "it's not about
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aaut growing the commmmity that's here." orton says he and his crew are less than a month away from wrapping up the summerland project, as they wrap up sound mixing and cor fininiing. turning now to weather and meteorologis t chris havely. chris, it's cooled down heading into the overnight hours? skies will gradually cle tonight behind the cold front that movededhrough earlier on sunday. temperatures will fall down to near 30 overnight, cooler than last night. for monday, we'll have a mix of sun and clouds, with more clouds moving in by later in the day. winds will start off from the southwest, but shift to the northwest in the afternoon. temperatures will be cooling down again behind this boundary, down into the 20s overnight tomorrow night. an area of low pressure will develop along that boundary to our south, giving us a wintry mix
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monday night and into tuesday. as it looks now, a trace up to 2'' are forecast. snow will come to an end later on tuesday, with cooler temperatures for the rest of the week. however, another warm-up is looking likely for next week. tonight: gradual clearirig low: 28-34 winds: nw 15-25 alo: 29 dbq: 29 iow: 31tomorrow: p/cloudy, mix possible late high: 52-58 winds: sw 15-25 alo: 50 dbq: 47 iow: 55 back to you. waterloo police are investigating a report of shots fired this afternoon. it happened shortly after 4 o'clock in the 300 block of adams street. officers found multiple shell casings in the area. no one was injured, but police say bullets hit one home. a hearing this spring will determine whether a dubuque man accused of murder is competent to stand trial. 20 year-old helmononbetwell faces first-degree murder and first-degree sexual abuse charges in the death of nancy krapfl. betwell's attorney said he doesn't understand the charges against him, because he suffers from a mental disorder. his attorney filed for a competency hearing last week. a judge granted that request, and ucheduled the hearing for april 4th. police say betwell attacked krapff as she was walking near her home back in september. they say betwell admitted to raping and
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nothing better to do. he faces life in prison if convnvted. republican candidates are grabbing up last-minute tuesday, when more delegates are at stake than on any other day of the primary season. under fire today for refusing to condemn the klu klux klan in an interview. during campaign stops, both marcrcrubio and ted cruz attackck trump over his comments - as well as his electability, as they try to make up ground in the race for the nomination. "here's what would be a calamity: for donald trump to bebeome our nominee. if f 's our nominee, it could be the end of the republican party. it will split us and splinter us in a way that we may never be able to recover, and the democrats will be joyful about it." "recognize that trump as nominee mean hillary probably wins and we lose this country." republicans, as well as democrats, in about a dozen
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tuesday. that includes people in texas, where 155 republican and 252 democratic delegates are at stake. the national aiance on mental health says about 1 in 5 adults in the u-s experiences mental illness in a given year. that struggle is playing out on stage at theatre cedar rapids in a musical called "next to normal." kcrg-tv9's jill kasparie explains how this show aims to spark conversation about this issue, that stretches far beyond the theatre doors. music "it's almost e eirely sung." this cast of next to normal is singing about a topic musical form. "we think that people who suffer need a voice and it's an atypical topic in musical theater" that's right this show is about one family's struggle with mental illness. tracie hodina van pelt plays diana "she is diagnosed with bipolar disorr and has suffered with it
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plays her husband, says the actors know mental illness s a reality for many.y. "21:18:20 a lot of the cast and crew, we have had discussions about mental illness and i don't think there's a single exception that everybody has had some experience with mental illnessutside of the ow " so - as part of the show, the cast t cided to team up with area organizations that work to help those with menl illness. information booththare set up in the loloy of the theater, talk backs are happening after the shows and a portion of the ticket sales will go to each group, like four oaks. "53:58 we are super excited to be a part of the work the thter cedar rapids is doing and really helping the community have a little bit of understanding about working with h milies who are dealili with mental illness and how it is normal in our community to be around other individuals who are dealing with mental illness as well. " they're singing to get people xalking and they're singing to make a difference. "21:21:12 it has made me realize everybody suffers from something and we just want to portray this so people start
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stigma." in cedar rapids, jill kasparie, kcrg-tv9 news. tickets are still available for the show, which kicked off this weekend and runs the first two weekends of march. a new group in dubuque is getting people with physical disabilities involved in some f f and games. the adaptive sports league hosts an activity each month that everyone can take part in.
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a new organization in dubuque is helping people with physical disabilities get involved in sports. each month, the adaptive sports league hosts a friendly competition for people whose disabilities often keep them from enjoying the mes they love. in tonight's show you care spotlight, kcrg tv-9's dubuque bureau chief katie wiedemann introduces us to the game of "beep ball." beeping ball that sound means it's time to play ball! "the ball beeps. the bases beep. " in beep ball, the concept is the same as traditional baseball. "basically you want to score a run and you don't want to get out. " both the pitcher and the catcher are sighted. but everyone else in the game is either blind or
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gggles to distort thee vision. "it comes with a lot of practice. you have to be good with your concentration and mobility and be able to decide which base is beeping, because only one of them will beep. " beep out fielders listen for that sound, andcan be on their hands and knees, so they can use their sense of touch to help find the beeping ball. in this leagage, organizers say everyone is welcome to take a swing at any adaptive sport. that's the name of the game. "someone overcoming their and really living being able to participate. " beeping g that sound means someone who's used to sitting on the sidelines, is instead getting the chance they've been waiting for. news. snow is back in the
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down into the 20s overnight tomorrow night. an area of low prereure will develop along that boundndy to ouousouth, giving us a wintry mix and snow for monday night and into tuesday. as it looks now, a trace up to 2'' are forecast. snow will come to an end later on tuesday, with cooler temperatures for the rest of the week. however, another warm-up is looking likely for next week. tonight: gradual clearing low: 28-34 winds: nw 15-25 alo: 29 dbq: 29 iow: 31tomorrow: p/cloudy, mix possible late high: 52-58 winds: sw 15-25 alolo50 dbq: 47 iow: 55tomorrow night: chance of snow/mix low: 24-30 win: nw 10-20 alo: 24 q: 25 iow: 29tutsday: chance of snow early high: 33 - low: 27 wednesday: mostly cloudy high: 39 - low: 20 ththsday: chance of light snow highgh33 - low: 27 fridaa partly cloudy high: 36 - low: 20 saturday: chance of showers high: 43 - low: 26
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season games. this year, the hawkeyes have lost three out of their last four with three regular season games left. ... today hawkeyes were on the road at ohio state ... 1st half, watch anthony clemmons just tip the pass to ohio native ahmad wagner who slams it home... iowa up 18-17 ... later in the f fst half, watch the crossover by mike gesell... then he throws it down with authority... but the hawkeyes trailed 35-30 at halftime ... iowa did not make a three in the first haha... but finally dodos in the 2nd as peter jok hits one in the corner... hawkeyes down two ... later on, it's cedar rapids jefferson grad jarrod uthoff with a long three... he splashes it in... jarrod had 16 asasowa leads 44-42 ... closing minute of the game... iowa down one... kam williams hits the three-ball corner pocket... ohio state has a 4- point lemd ... iowg has to respond... adam woodbury banks in the two.... hawkeyes down two with 42 seconds left... they'd get the ball back with
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theie... but his shot i blocked... ohio state hangs on to win 68-64... 3rd straight loss for the hawkeyes ... after the game i spoke with former hawkeye jess settles on the phphe via fafaetime for this week'k' sunday night spotlight. jess, another loss for the hawkeyes, 68-64 to ohio state today. that's three straight losses, four out of their last five. i think the big question on everyone's mind is, what's going on with the hawkeyes? "josh, the biggest thing is they're failing to knock down open shots. they only had 64 points in the game today, they had 59 points against wisconsin. this is an iowa team that has been at the top of the big ten conference in scoring all season. right n, it's a combination of not being able to score and then that so much pressure on them to be perfect defensively, and they're struggling to communicate on that end as well. when you get wide open shots josh, and you're a good shooter, at this level you have to knock them in. they
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in a shooting slump." are you okay with gesell taking that shot on the last play? "he probably got a little too deep. i thought uthoff got wiped out on the screen. give ohio state credit for blocking the shot; they didn't help off on peter jok, but you would've liked to have gotten a better look than that. it should not have come down to that, they had a couple of mental breakdowns defensively giving up the three to loving and williams where i believe clemmons and uthoff really got suckck in too far on that, and you can leave shooters open late in the game. the tail spin continues." let's talk about iowa state. they have two more regular season games and got a huge win against kanans state. steve prohm has dealt with a lot of things, especially the suspension of jameel mckay. do you feel the team is finallyoing what he wants do after saturday's win? "he probablblhas a little more control. he was in a
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group of guys won two tournament championships in the big 12 already. so they come in and get a new voice, and he just had to lay down the law on a couple of guys. for iowa state, they are going to be able to score against anybody. they can beat anybody in the scoring column. the queseson is josh, can they defend? they're too talented to play the way they have been defensively just giving up easy layups and wide open shots. that's the area, do they buy into his system defensively. if they do, then they're as talented as anyone." let's go to uni, they have the missouri valley cocoerence totonament on friday. what do you like about the panthers and should they be the favorite despite being a no. 4 seed? "they're going to have to go down there and shoot the ball extremely well, which they have been doing. there's a lot of pressure on them. obviously, they've take it one game at a time, but they have to win this tournament. they have to get back to playing the way they did at the beginning of
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where they were not afraid of anybody. it'll probably come down to northern iowa and wichita state." ... mount mercy men's basketball facing york college in the championship game of the a.i.i. tournaant ... mustangs get off to a quick start, linn-mar grad derik gogg with the hard drive to the hoop... mount mercy up 28-9 ... then it's kennedy grad kyle lamaak with the transition bucke.. he had 10 points off the bench... mustangs led 38-25 at halftime ... 2nd half, kennedy grad ben struss nails one of his 3 three-pointers.. he had 11 points as mount mercy leads 41-27 ... they keep spreading the ball around... chris ford scoops it in to make it a 15 point lead ... then it's alex houston with the drive for two of his 15 points... mount mercy wins the conference title with the 74-61 vicicry and is heading to the naia tournament ... two women's college basketball scores, uni beats loyola 63-52 to remain number one in the missouri valley conference... and clarke cruised past indiana university northwest
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tournament was on the line today. john campbell has highlights of t t central reggnal up in dubuque. the wartburg knights crowned seven regional champs and will send 9 wrestlers to the diii champions, that inudes amulfo olea who came up with the late reversal and pin with just four seconds to go to win at 125. a real flurry in the third period between conner campo of wartburg and philip oppelt of cornel. campo a 6-3 victor. at 149 give luther's dakota gray a
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as he went for all the marbles late in the 3rd period against wartburg's defending national champion kenny martin. the move backfired and martin won 12-6 and at heavyweight, lance evans threw luther's conner herman in the first period and racked up the back points. evans came close to pinning his opponent but was happy with the 12 zip win and first ticket to the nationals. i am excited to see what i can do most exciting match of hte night came at 165 where wartburg's nick michael l almost pulled off the upset of the day in his bout with coe's defending national champion fah-ry soo-ware-ah. it was 4-4, closing seconds when michael makes the throw...but wait a minute.coe coach john oostendorp says it came too late...refs talked it over. they agreed it went overtime and soo-ware-ah pulled it out in the extra period. i keke thinking, i have wowoed this whololmatch. i have to do it now.it just worked out. sewera and all the top three finishers in dubuque will wrestlelet the
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championships in cedar rapids march 11 and 12. john campbell tv9 sports ... speaking of wrestling, tomorrow for on iowa live we have the legendary dan gable joining us... plus, the alburnett wrestling team. be susue to join us at the first avenue draught house. ... it was the final day of the missouri valley conference indoor track meet. scott saville has highlights from the uni dome. the day started with a bang do the uni wom paige knodle fresh of her win in the heptathlon took gold in the 60 hirdles with an mvc record time of.8.24. i keep feeling myself this is the last time running the hurdles hept in ththdome. the uni men picked up some points in the 60 hurdles from. daydaurice fountain who finished 3rd in 99 in the womens 400 the panthers maddie beeler won her heat and finished 3rd with a time of 55.85. in the high jump kassidy sharp of northern iowa finished 2nd with a jump 5'7 the panthers dominated the womens 800 and what a finish amber clock holds off her teammate brette corey to win with a time of 2:14.39.
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and now abc'c' "jimmy kimmel live after the oscars"! >> how do you think it went? what did you think of j-law's dress? which white people did you go after, bro? >> chris, over here, did you to us! >> jimmy, jimmy kimmel, what are you doing out here? >> jimmy: my mom got me this camera, i figured i'd get a few shots. >> don't y y have the "after the oscars" special tonight? >> jimmy: yeah, but -- did you get a gift basket? can i get some of f at nourishingnglotion? yo, chris. did leta rock it tonight? chris, who are you wearing? chris! i didn't find out who you're wearing!
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wearing! >> dicky: from hollywood -- it's "jimmy kimmel live after the oscars"! tonight - ben affleck, tracy morgan, henry cavill, jesse isenberg, j.k. simmons, will arnett, nathan lane, matthew broderick, mike tyson, and less. plus we go live to the governors ball. presented by samsung. with cleto and the cletones. and now -- lilits, camera, action - here's jimmy kimmel!
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>> jimmy: thank you. i was not expecting it. thank you. i'm jimmy. thanks for watching. thanks for staying up. i know it's late for a sunday night but welcome to our 11th annual after the oscars special. the statues have been handed out, the speececs have beenn spoken, and once again i was not invited to any of the after parties so here we are together. [ cheers and applause ] making the best of it. it was a night of coroversy. it was a night of awareness. it was a night of a lot of uncomfortable famous white people trying to make sure they clapped when the cameras were on them. as you know there were no black nominees in the acting categories. tonit's oscar hopefulssere whiter than the line to buy t-shirts at a michael bolton concert. the only way a black or hispanic or asian octoberer was going to win an oscar was if they let steve harvey announce the winner and that didn't happen. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: the show went mostly as expected, there weren't a ton of surprises. the biggestturprise was
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movie called "the 100 year old man who climbed out the window and disappeared." it was an interesting show. the sound cut out on one of the guys who won best sound design. true. i think the person -- the kid who introduced best short was short. so that w w good. and the woman who won best costume design showed up dressed like this. >> this is the second oscar and tenth nomination for jenny bevin. the first oscar in this category -- >> jimmy: she looked like sammy hagar in sturgis. i guess she doesn't t te her workome with her. "spotlight" won best picture. brie larson won best actress. [ cheers and applause ] leonardo dicaprio won best actor. leo hadd been nominated six types. until tonight he never won but everyone kept saying, this is his year.
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but you know, the man hasad sex with a different victoria's secret model every night of -- every year of his year. from 1991 on has been his year. and it was a special night whether you're a fan of movies, movie stars, or the ryan seacrest men's wear collection. we still have many great moments in store yore rou. ben affleck is here. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: bad man versus superman." he's batman. yesterday was ben's 4-year-old son's birthday party and guess what costume his son made him wear to entertain the kids at the party. that's right. we'll find out how thatwent. it's not all glamorous, this hollywood stuff. one day you're on the red carpet, next day 15 preschoolers sticks. right now the stars are heading to the governors ball, the post-oscars party across the street. our man guillermo is there standing by live via our big cisco screen. [ cheers and applause ]
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now, guillermo, what's it like, are thereny big stars around? >>. >> yes, there's a lot of the big stars around here. beautiful women too. >> jimmy: why don't you have any of them? >> oh. they at the bar right now. >> jimmy: they're at the bar, all right. see who you can russell up for us and we'll check back in later. how many drinks have you had? >> about 40 shots of tequila. >> jimmy: okay, great. perfect. so he's ready to go. that's actuallyyess than he typically has on a sunday night. thank you, guillermo. we'll check back in with you later at the governors ball. one of the most critically acclaimed movies of the year this year that was not nominated for best picture was "cred," the story of rocky balboa training the son of one of his greatals. stallone was nominated for an oscar. it would not be aovie without a sequel. the world premiere trailer for the much-anticipated followup to "creed." >> i will have a ccice.
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i was born to do this. can't nobody stop me! >> you got no business being here. >> the other fighters are fighting for their les. look at you. eating a hero sandwich. >> it's a hoagie! >> get the hell out of my gym! >> look at this. your first fight with clubber. you got caught with a right uppercut. you're sounding lime a dolphin with an itchy blow hole. hee hee! hee hee! hee hee! hee hee! hee hee hee hee hee hee hee! >> how do you know so much about that fight? >> that was my pops. >> junior.
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i need you to train me. >> train you to do what? >> what do you think i'm'm talking about, ol, to fight. >> you don't look like a fighter. life. the people who said i couldn't fight -- >> ha ha ha! >> fighting my demons. >> hey, baby. >> fighting thatt lady in the wendy's drive-through because she wouldn't give me extra dipping sauce. >> quheerls my dipping sauce? >> all i asked for was extra aahhh! >> i'll teach you to fight, kid. let's get some shorts on you come on. >> allll i asked for was extra honey busmustard. >> come onon come on now! >> oohh! >> one.
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here! >> boxing isn't just about strength and conditioning. it's about heart. brains. >> and fowls and wings! >> over, under, round and througug meet mr. bunny pull it through. you're not focusing. you've got to focus. beat that meat like you mean it!t! harder! harder! you've got to kill him! give it to him! what the hell are you doing? whoa, whoa, whoa! hey, hey, no! no! no! got it? you've got it. you've got it! [ cheers and applause ] >> it's the fight nobody thought would happen. >> this is a fight nobody thought should happen. this is a disgrace to the sport of boxing.
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>> this is o5r last round, you need this one. >> i keep thinking i is gum. >> focus, kid, you need your edge out there! >> rrrow! hey, get me some. honey mustard, you remembered! >> that's right. now go get him. >> that was clubber. >> i know, i know. mwah, mwah, ah, mwah. love y y so much. i got hair in my teeth. go get him! >> pop? >> quit your jibber jabber, fool! >> how am i doing?
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there will be a sequel. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: we have to take a break but it will be worth it, stay there. we have mama stars and m my surprises on the way. it's our biggest show of the year. our 11th annual "after the oscars" special - we'll be right back after this. [ cheers and applause ] why can't i buy this weird, shaved-meat sandwich with my phone? why can't my battery last long enough to navigate me through these scary woods? ugh. eh, probably fine though. [lightning strike] why can't my phone he enough memory y hold all a hundred d d forty-five of mymyovies, like that one with the action and the martial arts. you seen that one? why can't my phone take high quality low light photos instead of this big, expensive camera? [police siren] why don't you comemeown from there sir? you got it! why doesn't my phone work after i pour this expensive champagne all over it? how am i 'sposed to show people how rich and carefree i am? why did i have to wait so long in this commercial to do a celebrity sports person cameo? [scoreboard buzzer] why don't i ever get asked to be the
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ha, ha. good question. introducing the only water-resistant, fast, wireless-charging, best camera having, memory expxpdable, pay almoststnywhere, samsung galaxy s7 edge. vr experience ended. man, i would have made a great spokesperson. [sigh] the new, do everything, galaxy s7 edge. hi, i'd like to make a dep--
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rescan, rescan. rescan item. vo: it happens so often you almost get used to it. phone voice: main menu representative. representative. representative.. vo: which is why ing put first... relax, we got this. vo: ...takes some getting used to. join the nation. nationwide is on your side representative. so my kids don't have to f fage, got two jobsbso pay a mortgage, and i've also got a brain. life's short, talk is cheap. i'll be working while you sleep. still don't think i've got a brain? you think a resume's enough? who'll step up when things get tough? don't you want that kind of brain? a degree is a degree. you' gonna want someononlike me.
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>> jimmy: hello and welcome back to our 11tannual "after the ososrs" special. babaan is on the way. first let's check in with guillermo on the wall of america at the governors ball happening across -- look at this, guillermo, y y did it! i asked you to get us a big star, you got us a big star, sacha baron cohen, hello! [ cheers and applause ]
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>> jimmy: hehe you had a pretty quick costume change there, i guess. >> i don't know what you're talking about that wasn't me. >> jimmy: oh, that's right. i forgot. >> the academy would never let somemedy like ali g. come out. i went to the toilet, it was done. >> jimmy: is it true that sacha -- you were supposed to present and instead ali g. wound up filling in as a surprise? >> that is true. that is true. i was very@ displayed because i was getting ready -- nature called. i went into the bathroom. next thing i knew, i had been usurped by ali g. and made a fool of. >> jimmy: ali g. presented by olivia, did she know ali g. was coming out instead of you -- [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: i'm sorry -- [ cheers and applause ]
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>> i'm not aware. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: sacha, i apologize, there's some idiots in the back. >> yeah, there's a lot of complete pardon my french [ bleep ] walking around. >> jimmy: yeah, there are people jumping around in the back like -- >> they're just trying to get famous. a llt of people are here upset they didn't win tonight. >> jimmy: you know, this is really a shame that we put so much work into the show and then people just show and up they ruin it like that. >> bad losers. >> jimmy: wellll you know -- sacha, you have a movie "the brothers grimsby" coming out. >> that's right, that's right. march 11th. >> jimmy: and again, i apologize for what's g gng on here, very unprofessional. guillermo, you're the one that should be watching for what's going on. get the guy behind you out of the shot! >> who is -- >> jimmy: thank you very much. >> dim wit. >> jimim: i'm so sorry. >> stay away, please. >> jimmy: there's no excuse for that. i apologize again.
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but thank you very much. >> yeaea >> jimmy: sacha baron cohen! cheers and applause e >> stay away. >> jimmy: thank you so much, guillermo. >> stay away next year. >> jimmy: thank you. keep rounding people up, will you, guillermo? no -- >> hey, jimmy -- >> jimmy: thank you very much. much. [ cheers and applause ] it just really pisses me off, that's all. so back to the movies. this is the reason why we're watching television tonight. is on car night is a night to celebrate great films. if you're at all familiar with the movie "the prprucers" you know it is one of the best comedies ever. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: the producers" is a classic, won an oscar for mel brooks, record-breaking 12 tony awards when mel made it into a broadway musical starring nathan lane and matthew broderick. it's been almost 15 years. now they're back with a diabolical new scheme to unleash
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>> they were a pair of political consultants on needed a break. >> that's it! we're finished, through, kaput! >> don't say that, max. >> let's face it, bloom, we haven't had a winning campaign in years. >> max, do you realize under the right circumstances it might be possible to make more money from a losing candidate than from a winner? >> what did you say? >> first we find a bad candidate, then we raise money like crazy and promise all the donors ambassadorships to italy or sweden or armenia. then when the public figures out what a nut case our guy is he drops out of the race -- >> and we keep all the dough! oh, darling bloom, glorious bloom! you bloody genius you! >> max, don't. >> but wait, wait. this candidate. he's got to be the worst candidate in history. a real train wreck. schmuck, puttz, gold-plated nincompoop. where would we find auffoon
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>> and@now a message from the board room. >> people have been asking about my desk and the fact that i have so many papers on my desk. it's actually very neat. but if you look around, i mean, there's a lot of stufuf i've noticed over the years -- people have a lot going on on their desk. >> hand me the phone! the phone! >> my desk is a very important partrtf me -- >> yes, yes, yes. hello, hello, operator? >> -- that's a good thing -- >> get me the board room. you know which one. innocence thens they had a foolproof plan. >> there's a new horse in the race for the white house. his name, donald j. trump. can he beat the establishment? who will support him? fiscal conservatives? the religious right? or crazy old semi-racist white people? >> they're sure he can win?
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trump is the very definition of a winner. >> just read the pin. >> oh. >> bless you, mrs. comisky, bless you. thank you. thank you. yes. i keep the checkie, thank you. thank you, mrs. comisky. yes, good-bye, mrs. comisky. here we go. that's a girl. oh, oh! beautiful, beautiful. we're going right out the door. all right, easy now. easy we don't have time for that. easy. all right. don't worry, it's only six flights. bye! >> bye. >> thank god for citizens united. >> 22 ambassadors to france so far. and 25 m mlionbucks, bloom. i have to tell you, running trump was smart. but your idea about building a wall across the mexican border? brilliant. >> not as brilliant as your idea about making the mexicans pay for it. >> he won't last the week!
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>> i will build a great, great wall on our southern border and i will have mexico pay for that wall. mark my words. we're in the money we're in the money >> announcer: but they pick the wrong fool. >> good news for donald trump. the whole world has gone stark raving mad for him like these two looney birds, these numb skulls, even in whack a doodle. >> you ready for someone who will let our warriors do their job and go kick isis' ass? >> he's still in the lead, max. >ow could this happen? >> well, i hear he's a proven businessman who knows how to get things done. >> yeah, he'll stand up to the mexicans. >> i can't believe this it's not possible. >> where did we go right? >> i don't know. >> wait a minute.
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yes. >> did hee say we should kick out >> yes. >> did he propose banning all 1 billion muslims from entering the u.s.? >> si! >> did he say heidi klum was no longer a 10? >> yes, yes! >> nothing is working, max, nothing. >> oh, no! no >> announcer: just in time for the elececon, it's a story t tt starts off funny and then gets really, really depressing. [ cheers and applause ] we needed a chump to put on the stump a frumpy grumpy named donald j. trump he's buildg a wall a thousand feet tall don't worry cause the mexicans will pay for it all >> announcer: from the producers of "the producers" comes a movie that will make america great again.
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and cloris leachman star in -- you've been trumped >> maybe he won't be such bad esident. bong bong. >> whoa, what have we done? [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: we have a lot to come including we have tonight on the show never before seen footage from "batman versus superman." [ cheers and applause ] the "after oscars post show." we'll be right back with ben affleck! [ cheers and applause ] >> dicky: jimmy kimmel after the oscars is brought to you by samsung. go to youtube.com/jimmykimmielive to see guillermo nursed in a virtual worldld using a samsung v-r headset. [ panting ] i focused on being prepared.
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