time now for tonight's closing argument. terrorism and politics is the topic. today's attempted terrorist attack fell just days before americans go to the polls. in the past, terror threats have tended to help whoever was in office, tipping public support toward the president. so, tonight, we ask you -- will the revelation of this new terrorist plot affect how you'll vote on tuesday? and do you think it helps or hurts democrats running for congress? tell us what you think at the "nightline" facebook page or on

the "nightline" page at abcnews.com. finally tonight, we look ahead to next week. monday night, we'll bring you all the latest from nevada and alaska races as well as take a look at sarah palin's future plans. and on tuesday, election night, my co-anchors andly spread out across the country. terry will be in washington, i'll cover the midwest from chicago and bill will be in california. so, as the results sweep across the country, we'll be there to bring you the latest. we hoep you'll join us for a special expanded coverage, an hour of "nightline" on both coasts live. that is our report for tonight. from all of us at abc news, good night, america, and have a safe weekend. >> jimmy: hi, i'm jimmy kimmel with the highly anticipated the sims 3. all new features make it easier than ever to mess with life as you know it and unlock the ultimate karma powers and unleash them on your sims.

here we go. what a feeling. right guillermo? >> yes. what a feeling. >> jimmy: you don't seem happy enough, guillermo. i'm going to use my karma power to remedy that, okay? >> ay yi yi. >> jimmy: what does that mean? >> that is sim-ish for thanks. >> jimmy: you're welcome. let's try the giant jackpot power karma. >> wow, oh, my gold. >> jimmy: what does that mean? >> that is sim-ish for i am riff. >> jimmy: what are you going to buy with all that money? >> i will buy her diamond ring and for me, a new sports car. >> jimmy: what are you going to get for me? >> nothing for you. >> jimmy: well, then maybe you should experience the quake-maker, guillermo. >> jimmy: yeah, to you, too.

please, watch your language. >> dicky: pick up your copy of the sims 3 for consoles or ds beginning october 26th. "jimmy kimmel live," back in two minutes with zach galifianakis, from "jersey shore" nicole "snooki" polizzi. and music from trombone shorty and orleans avenue. here, take the card. you go to the shops... i'll meet you at the gate. thanks. please remove all metal objects out of your pockets.

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♪ it's "jimmy kimmel live" >> dicky: and now, hold tight, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hello there, i'm jimmy. i'll be hosting the show and performing comedy for you tonight. thanks for coming, thanks for watching. the city of hollywood is abuzz tonight. right behind our theater, the l.a. feast of san gennarro is going to g be going all weekend long. i started this back in 2001 in my backyard at home, for real. and now it's in my backyard at work. all the money we make goes to charity. all the food we eat goes to obesity. very good cause.

this is celebrating the life of st. genaris, the patron saint of naples. he became a martyr when the emperor of rome forced him to eat canolies until his stomach exploded. this is the largest annual gathering of men named tony on the west coast. since we do have a lot of italian guys roaming around tonight, we thought it would be fun to dedicate a new segment to them. it's the bragging italian guy of the night. >> i used to eat them walking down the street with joe piscapo. >> jimmy: oh, well, that's something. [ applause ] we ought to hook him up with snooki, you know? nicole "snooki" polizzi is here tonight. on the night her program aired on mtv.

tonight on "jersey shore," what an episode. ronnie tried to give vinny flowers that he bought from another girl to sammi and angelina took a swing at the situation. i felt like i was watching home movies. i really did. now, my aunt chippy is in town for the feast. the studio audience met her. from time to time, she reviews the show "jersey shore" for us and she hates it, which is why we make her watch it. today, aunt chippy didn't know that snooki was here, so we showed aunt chippy "jersey shore" and had her do her review, and, well, take a look. >> i just watched the latest episode of "jersey shores." and, nothing's changed. it still sucks. i think it was disgusting that j-woww, whatever the frick her name is, is in bed with whatever his name is, and her, snooki comes in and she's playing

with -- is there nothing that's distasteful? is there nothing that is sacred? are they just such pigs that it doesn't matter? snooki about how her vagina got hurt riding on a bike. snooki, a, we don't give a [ bleep ] about your vagina, b, it's happened to everybody, but we don't discuss it. there are things that are not up for discussion. >> hello. >> and we don't discuss vaginas, snooki. >> jimmy: i've always said that. [ applause ] that's -- chippy and snooki. i knew we'd get them together. it had to happen. on the other side of the reality show coin, "top chef", they have a spin-off show, it's about pastry chefs. last night, they had to make desserts using penny candies,

which are the can dips you find in the big unsanitary barrels at the mall. seth used red hots because his mother loves them, because when his sorbet didn't freeze right, seth suddenly became very passionate. >> the first thing that went through my head was, i had taken this chance to do something for my mom and failed. >> i can't do it. i can't do this. i can't -- >> i'm not sure what's going on with seth. and then i realize that seth was crying because he didn't put his ice cream on the plate. >> i'm totally on your team, man. i am on your team. >> the red hots are for my mother. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: red hots are for my mom. did he just say the red hots are for my mommy? i don't think that's been said on tv before. uncle frank, is it appropriate for a grown man to call his mother mommy? >> sure, yes. >> jimmy: wrong.

[ laughter ] this is something. the end of an era, i guess. blockbuster video filed for bankruptcy today, because people didn't rewind, is why. experts say the bankruptcy had something to do with the fact that no one in america has rented a video since 1999, which and now where are we going to get a bag of microwave popcorn for $9? it actually works out well for me, because i owe about $3,000 in late fees on a vhs of "the santa claus" i wanted in '95. let's check back in with aunt chippy and snooki. see how that's going. >> i want more for you. guys will go with anybody. >> oh, i know. >> any place, anywhere. they'll stick that thing any place they can. >> what thing? whatever the hell you call th them -- >> jimmy: i think she will. [ applause ]

i got to tell you something. it smells so much like sausage and peppers in here right now i'm ravenously hungry. i might eat snooki when she comes out here. bedbugs are back. i -- i don't know where they went, but there are bedbug infestations all over the country right now. and i'm sorry to mention that if you are watching the show from bed at home, but -- i always thought bedbugs were imagine their, like eskimos. but they bite. new york has a massive problem. this is from a local cbs news. pay close attention to the woman behind the news anchor, on this week's exciting installment of "behind the news." >> experts say it is also important that you try to keep the bedbugs out of your home. hotel, you might want to use a plastic bag.

>> jimmy: they're everywhere. they are literally everywhere. [ applause ] the octo-mom is in the news again. she cannot afford to pay her mortgage, she says. who knew you could get a mortgage on a shoe. it's -- she and her 14 kids are facing foreclosure. they could possibly be out as early as monday. and, you know, say what you want about her, it's a terrible thing for the kids. so, to help them make a little bit of money, we had nadya drop the kids off at the show this afternoon. >> have a nice day at work, kids, make me some money. >> jimmy: that's about a third of the brood. now, we gave them jobs to make money. tonight's show is being produced entirely by octo-kids. mira helped dicky barrett record the intro today. okay. >> dicky: "jimmy kimmel live" back in two minutes with zach galifianakis. >> jimmy: okay. this is little caleb in the tape edit room cutting one of cousin

this is -- well, that's guillermo. that's noriah. she's one of the octuplets. she's putting mousse in guillermo's hair. that's young elijah, giving one of our security guards a well deserved foot rub. and look who is in the control room directing the show, right now? you know what, he's -- just a kid, he never misses a shot. thank you. hold on a second. caleb, i'm -- what do you want, oh, and look at this. one of the little ones is working security, too. [ applause ] guillermo's been replaced. wearing geraldo's mustache for some reason. this is kind of interesting. "sesame street" announced they are going to pull a music video they made starring katy perry and elmo.

♪ >> jimmy: they pulled it because parents complained about her outfit. which they felt was -- actually, i shouldn't say parents. moms complained about katy perry's outfit, which they felt were too revealing. meanwhile, almost every one of these mum penalties is completely naked all the time and nobody says anything. ernie and bert are the only ones with decency enough to wear pants on that show. it is interesting determining when it's okay and not okay for children to see breasts. like, when you are born, it's okay. then you get to be 4, it starts to get questionable. then you hit 8, 9, 10, totally out of the question. 16, 17, my case, like, 23, all of a sudden, it's okay again. it's -- so, hakuna matata, you know? "sesame street" is not as innocent as it used to be.

things have changed in that neighborhood. they do some edgy stuff from time to time. i watched pbs last night and i was shocked to see this commercial. i didn't even know they had them on pbs. >> coming soon to dvd -- >> drink! drink! >> "sesame shore." learn to count. >> one, two, three, four, five, six! >> sing. ♪ rubber rubber ♪ you're the one ♪ i wear you when i'm having fun ♪ >> and pronounce new words. >> grenade. land mine. grenade. >> meet new friends like -- >> and the snooki monster. have fun with all your favorites. ronnie. >> kids, you know it's important to drink your milk every day, right? >> sammi. >> bitches, please, learn to share. >> snooki. >> want to [ bleep ]?

>> d.j. pauly d. >> i love taking a bath. >> me, too. >> vinny. >> you want me to hold your hair? >> and j-woww. "sesame shore" coming to dvd and blu ray. ♪ rubber rubber we're awfully fond of you ♪ >> jimmy: all right, well, that's -- [ applause ] let's -- before we go, one more check-in with snooki and aunt chippy, if we could. >> and let me tell you something. i think the f-word has been overused. overused. i mean, i know the f-word. i could say the f-word, it's not a new word. it's four letters. but it is used as a bleep, beep, beep, beep -- >> i appreciate you giving me advice but i'm pretty sure that aunt chip is dtf, and that's

all. >> what is hell is dtf? >> down to [ bleep ]. [ applause ] >> jimmy: we have a good show tonight. against the backdrop of the feast of san gennaro. snooki is here, from "jersey shore." we have music from trombone shorty and orleans avenue. and we'll be right back with zach galifianakis. [ female announcer ] will women switch to new caltrate soft chews because they have 20% more calcium per chew than viactiv or for the delicious flavors like chocolate truffle and vanilla creme? mmm. -mmm. -mmm. [ female announcer ] hard to say really. new caltrate soft chews, we put the yum in calcium. [ male announcer ] every day thousands of people are switching from tylenol to advil. to learn more and get your special offer,

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[ male announcer ] wanchai ferry. restaurant quality chinese in your grocer's freezer. >> jimmy: that's going on in our back lot. the feast of san gennare. all the proceeds go to benefit local charities. so if you're in hollywood this weekend, stop by and visit and george yourself on all sorts of

things. on that note, on this note of italian american pride, from "jersey shore" on mtv, nicole "snooki" polizzi is here with us tonight. also, unbelievably great trombone player from new orleans, this is his new album, called "backatown," trombone shorty and orleans avenue from the bud light outdoor stage. tomorrow night, we have an interesting show. joaquin phoenix will be here tomorrow night, as will science bob pflugfelder and hear music from primus, so join us tomorrow, too. our first guest tonight is one of the finest men this nation has ever produced. you know him from the movie "the hangover," from the tv show "bored to death" and soon from a new movie called "it's kind of a funny story," it opens in theaters october 8th. please say hello to zach galifianakis. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: how are you doing?

>> good, thank you. >> jimmy: you -- you have got what appears to be lipstick all over you. >> oh, do i? shoot. >> jimmy: yeah, a little bit on -- >> i met snorki backstage. >> jimmy: no, no, it's -- snooki. >> snooki. >> jimmy: unless there was somebody else you met. >> she had a stepladder and kissed me everywhere. >> jimmy: you probably want to get that off. it looked like you've been shot in the ear. do you -- by the way, do you watch "jersey shore?" is that on your schedule? >> is that on pbs? >> jimmy: no. >> i haven't seen it, i'm a grown man, so -- >> jimmy: you don't watch that. >> i haven't seen it yet. i look forward to seeing it. >> jimmy: how was your summer? did you have a good one? it's not even close to off, by the way. >> let me get it off. it's very distracting. which side -- you look like a raggedy ann doll. there you go. now you look just happy.

>> very pleased. oh, look, my alcoholism coming through. what were you asking? >> jimmy: what did you do this summer? >> this summer, i hung out. i -- i -- >> jimmy: that's it? >> i built a tool shed. >> jimmy: did you really? >> yeah. i built a tool shed two days ago. >> jimmy: really? >> yep. and live in north carolina and i have a little -- >> jimmy: you have a farm there, right? >> yep. >> jimmy: why do you have a farm? why do you need a farm? what are you farming? >> i don't know if i'm pronouncing it right. pot? no. not true. not true. we have apple trees. >> jimmy: you do? >> we have a couple giraffe

>> jimmy: really? ss. >> couple giraffes. just ride around on a giraffe. >> jimmy: do you like kind of the privacy of living in, on a farm? >> it's like 70 acres, so, there's a lot of nudity. [ laughter ] i'm naked all the time. >> jimmy: you are? >> a lot of paparazzi. >> jimmy: is that right? >> always taking my picture. >> jimmy: they're out there? >> yep. yep. exactly, yeah. >> jimmy: i had no idea they made it all the way out there. >> well, i call them in to take pictures of me. nothing's happened yet. >> jimmy: do you really work on the farm? do you do things? >> well, i mean, i -- i ride around in my tractor and i kind of -- sit and think and -- we drink moon shine and -- >> jimmy: do you really? >> yeah. >> jimmy: who makes the moon shine? >> this guy that's been in prison for murder. [ laughter ] i wish i was joking. >> jimmy: is that where he learned to make it? >> no, he learned to make it and then learned to make it when he was young and then he murdered someone.

in self-defense. do you ever drink with him? >> no, no. i don't like to drink with murderers. >> jimmy: that's good. yeah. unregulated alcohol, you don't know the content of. >> but he's -- well, i don't want to say too much about him because -- >> jimmy: you'll get killed. >> he's a murderer. >> jimmy: you'll be growing on the farm. >> exactly. bury me. >> jimmy: so it's not like a big physical thing where you are out there, doing -- well, in hollywood, people will buy farms just kind of because it sounds good and to get physically fit. >> i just walk around and try to figure out where i can get wi-fi. >> jimmy: really? >> yeah. so i can tweet. >> jimmy: are you out here in l.a. now or -- >> i flew in from north carolina this morning. >> jimmy: and how long will you stay? >> i'll be here for a month. >> jimmy: for a month? here working? >> yeah, working on -- a lot --

motion -- a talkie. >> jimmy: a talkie. do you still have a place out here? >> jimmy: you're homeless? >> i'm staying in a hotel. because your show puts people up. >> jimmy: not for a month, though. >> two nights. at a hotel. one of the best best westerns i've ever been in, by the way. >> jimmy: it is. >> i don't want to complain, but my room smells like if a foot could fart. it's an old joke. >> jimmy: we don't have any way of knowing that. >> old joke. >> jimmy: before we talk about the movie, i want to mention "bored to death," which comes i love that show. i think it's terrific, i really do. [ cheers and applause ] >> yes. i've seen a couple of the episodes, very good this year, and more situations and -- funny things -- >> jimmy: i saw that on the poster. more situations. >> trying to memorize what the poster says.

>> jimmy: your co-stars are jason schwartzman -- >> is it? >> jimmy: yes. he's one of them. and ted danson is the other. >> very nice men, both of them. if ted danson will just shut up about being on "cheers." yeah, ted, we know you were on "cheers," who gives a [ bleep ]? >> jimmy: yeah. well, you know, if i was on "cheers" i would bring it up a lot, too. >> yeah, i know. and every time i walk into the room, somebody goes "norm!" fat joke about myself. >> jimmy: you -- you look great, by the way -- [ applause ] >> lipstick and snooki. smell like a bruce springsteen cover band. >> jimmy: again, you have no way of knowing that. >> no, i have no idea. >> jimmy: but you -- you got this show going and you do -- and now the movie career is going beautifully and this

movie, i thought -- you were really -- this is some actual serious acting going on. >> yes, jimmy, it's a movie. what was i doing before that you saw? >> jimmy: well, i think that, well, it's just kind of odd to know you and to imagine you inherently foolish as acting is, because you're there pretending to be somebody else and it's dumb, you know, if you really -- >> it's silly. >> jimmy: i don't want to ruin it for you. you did a great job in the movie. i think it's going to be a big hit. i do. >> i hope you're right. i really like it. it's a movie that's set in a mental hospital and i researched it before i even knew about the movie going on. >> jimmy: voluntarily? >> i went and actually researched the movie, researched the part, did, like, went, spent a couple days in a mental hospital -- >> jimmy: you did? >> yeah. >> jimmy: how do you get in there? somebody make the call for you? >> ah -- i just called a facility and said, hey, i'm crazy, can i come in?

that simple. >> jimmy: and they said yeah. >> yeah, so -- no, someone called for me from the film and i just sat and talked to some people and took notes. >> jimmy: kind of reminds me of a john hughes movie, there's that kind of good feeling there, but you know, some serious stuff going on. >> that's exactly right. >> jimmy: thank you. let's look at a clip of it now. >> there's a clip? >> jimmy: everyone gets a sample. and if they enjoy it, they can see the whole thing. >> okay. very good. >> jimmy: here's "it's kind of a funny story," it opens october 8th. >> well -- i guess there's just been a lot going on in my mind lately. >> go ahead. >> okay, well this is sort of difficult to explain, but -- >> yeah. got you. >> and this summer school application that i'm really nervous about.

>> summer school? >> yeah, it's like this super prestigious kind of -- >> why would you want to be in school in the summer? you should be on coney island bird dogging chicks. >> are you a doctor? >> jimmy: you're not. you're not. hey, zach -- [ applause ] this is -- tell us what's going on here. this is -- this appears to be president obama's helicopter. >> yep. >> jimmy: why were you allowed near it? >> i actually went to the white house and hung out in the oval office. >> jimmy: you did not. >> i did. yeah. >> jimmy: why? >> that's what obama said. i don't know, i mean, somebody invites you and you end up in the oval office. it was really cool. he wasn't there, but it's kind of cool to be there and, he has, like, posters up.

>> jimmy: he does? >> oh, like, hanging their -- >> jimmy: inspirational stuff? >> he's got a poster of hall and oates. >> jimmy: is that right? >> big hall and oates fans. >> jimmy: he is? i didn't know that. >> that is also a great name for an oatmeal delivery company. >> jimmy: you're right, it is. put it on a shirt or something. our your ear is still bleeding, by the way. >> oatmeal delivery company, uncle frank. >> i didn't hear that. >> jimmy: he doesn't know. don't worry. if he heard it perfectly, you wouldn't know it. do you like oatmeal? >> i do. but i love him. i love jack. >> jack. thank you aunt frank. >> jimmy: not anne frank, of course. never been in an attic. thank you for being here. would you like to stay for snooki?

>> if she doesn't mind, i'd like to hang out -- >> jimmy: i doubt she'll mind. i think she'll be delighted. zach galifianakis, everybody. "it's kind of a funny story" opens october 8th and "bored to death" sunday night. we'll be right back with snooki. ♪

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>> jimmy: welcome back with zach galifianakis. trombone shorty and orleans avenue still to come. our next guest stands only 4'9", she's just slightly larger than the pickles she loves. you can follow her adventures on "jersey shore" at 10:00 on mtv. please welcome nicole "snooki" [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: how are you? >> good. >> jimmy: good to see you. thanks for messing with my aunt earlier. you seemed to slide right into that. >> she's totally dtf. please. >> jimmy: remind everybody what that stands for. >> down to [ bleep ]. >> jimmy: right.

just saying. are you? >> i'm not even going to answer that. >> jimmy: all right. you know, we have this feast going on, which is, in new york they have a huge feast. have you ever been to that? >> i've been to, in the city, and all you do is drink and drink and drink. >> jimmy: and eat, too. you don't eat there? >> yeah, you have the pizza, sausages, it's a good time. >> jimmy: we have all that stuff out there, too. hopefully you stick around. >> i'm excited. >> jimmy: we're watching season two of "jersey shore" but you've already taped season three of the show and you've eliminated one of the house mates -- >> thank god. >> jimmy: that's right. >> can't stand her. >> jimmy: angelina, who you guys all -- none of you like her. >> no. >> jimmy: but she's been replaced by one of your friends. >> yeah. which is a good thing because i needed somebody in the house to party with, to have a good time with. angelina just wasn't that girl. >> jimmy: you were so serious in the past. >> yeah.

>> jimmy: is that going to affect the chemistry of the house? because now you have a friend, are you guys going to go off on your own and ignore the others? >> not at all. because if everybody loves me in the house they're going to love this girl because she's kind of like my twin. all we want to do is party and have a good time. >> jimmy: just like zach. that's the same thing. i think you can make a nice couple, by the way. is he somebody you'd be interested in? he's not a juice head. >> you still have my lipstick on your ear. >> yeah, i know. and somewhere else. >> jimmy: but zach would not be -- like, you could -- could the two of you, snookin up? would that be a possibility? >> i would like to watch the show to get to know her a little bit better. >> gtl, that's all you need. >> what's that again? >> gtl. >> what's that again? >> gym, tan, laundry. and fist pump. >> jimmy: gym, tan, laundry. >> you know what nasa means?

>> jimmy: what what? >> nasa? >> is that spaceships? >> jimmy: exactly right. >> yep. >> jimmy: now, snooki -- you were, as we all heard about, you were arrested for -- i've never heard of anyone being arrested for, the charge was, annoying people on the beach. >> what are you going to do? somebody's got to do it. >> jimmy: is that really -- have you ever heard of anyone getting arrested for that? >> i mean, i think it was a little too overboard. obviously. i started drinking at 10:00 and it's ka lated to being wasted at 12:00 and -- but i had a good time doing it and i didn't hurt anybody, so -- >> jimmy: what were you drinking? >> i was drinking soco, vodka, long islands, beer -- >> jimmy: this is between 10:00 a.m. and noon? >> yeah. i started drinking at work, i was funneling and then i went to the bar after. >> jimmy: and you weigh, like, 43 pounds, and this is going to hit you like a ton of bricks, right? >> i feel like i can drink any older man under the table. >> jimmy: oh, really?

>> i feel like i can handle my alcohol. >> jimmy: and yet out were arrested for annoying people on the beach. >> what are you going to do? >> jimmy: now you're in the house -- do you feel like you will make life long friends as a result of this? >> definitely, everybody in the house, we're so close. we have the same personalities and i feel we could be going to the jersey shore until we're 90. >> jimmy: 90 years old? >> as long as i can walk and drink, my liver is still fine, i'm good to go. >> jimmy: at this rate, that's not going to be the case. >> i got my liver tested, it's 100% fine. so i think i'll be fine. >> jimmy: they said 100%? >> i think so. that's what i'm hoping. >> jimmy: okay. speaking of being close, we've -- it's very complicated so we put together a chart here to kind of -- >> what is that? >> this is the hookup chart we have here, all right? now -- you hooked up with vinny -- >> pauly walnuts? >> jimmy: he somehow wound up on here, i don't know how he -- but you hooked up with vinny, you kissed j-woww and the situation.

situation hooked up with angelina and kissed you, obviously, and sammi. pauly hooked up with angelina and j-woww. she hooked up with pauly and kissed you. vinny hooked up with you and angelina. angelina hooked up with, um -- with elmo, right? no? hold on a second. i think we got this confused with another thing. but i think what i'm trying to say is, if any one of you has a disease, you all have that disease now. >> no. well, maybe, but -- i don't want to think about that. >> jimmy: you ever get like embarrassed that they send cameras into your bedroom and, you know, showing you -- i don't know when they stop rolling. i would imagine they never stop rolling. >> they don't. never. >> jimmy: so there are video tapes -- there are probably 70 to 90 sex tapes now made -- >> probably even more. >> more. more. >> jimmy: really.

and do you wonder what they're doing? >> well, not me, because i only smooshed once. >> jimmy: only once. >> i didn't do anything wrong. but the boys, they bring home four girls at a time where they switch, and -- that could be a lot of money for a sex tape. >> jimmy: it could be. i heard j-woww has an offer from "playboy" and do you think she'll do that? >> have you seen her boobs? >> jimmy: yeah. >> she has such a nice body. and i think she should do it. >> jimmy: would you consider doing it? >> are you crazy? >> jimmy: i don't know. >> these are real so when this dress comes off, it's like down to here. they don't stay up. >> jimmy: upside down or something like that. have you been watching your friend the situation on "dancing with the stars"? >> yes. and i was so nervous because, let me tell you, mike does not dance, when we got to the clubs, all he does is this. so, i'm like, mike dog the cha-cha or the salsa, it's going to be really bad. but when i saw him, i was very proud. he did the steps. he got through it, he didn't fall on his face.

>> jimmy: did you vote for him? >> a couple of times, yeah. >> jimmy: is your family watching and voting for him? >> oh, yeah, my mom, my dad. we're pretty much all a family, so, if mike embarrassing himself, he embarrasses all of us. >> jimmy: that's right. >> we got to vote for him. >> jimmy: you guys, one thing you don't want to get is embarrassed. >> we already are, so -- >> jimmy: well, i have to say, for some reason, and i sometimes wonder what i'm doing with my life but i'm fascinated with what goes on in that house. and -- >> you would totally fit in. >> jimmy: oh, yeah. i'd fit right in. i'd be crying in the corner. >> jimmy: i'd be beaten up by two of the girls and that would be the end. >> oh, no. i think you're hot. i would take you. >> jimmy: well, thank you very much, snooki. you can see "jersey shore" thursday nights at 10:00 on mtv, as if you didn't know it already. snooki, everybody. zach galifianakis is here, as well. we'll be right back with trombone shorty.

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>> all new. oprah: actress portia de rossi. the secret that nearly killed her. you were proud of being 82 pounds. what even her wife, ellen degeneres, didn't know. >> jimmy: this is his new album "backatown." here with the song "one night only," trombone shorty and orleans avenue! ♪

♪ when the morning came i looked all around the room and i had no clue ♪ ♪ what it was i did or didn't do then all in a flash ♪ ♪ my memory came back around reached out my hands and you were nowhere to be found ♪ ♪ no where 'round i had you all night long i knew it all right ♪ ♪ when i asked your name that you were the right one ♪ ♪ but you were not there when the morning came i was making my way to the dance floor ♪ ♪ when i caught the rays sunlight of a pretty little thing ♪ ♪ you know what i'm saying so i pointed to the bar ♪ ♪ can i buy you a drink you said let's keep moving ♪ ♪ ain't no time to think so don't think ♪

all night long i knew it all right ♪ ♪ when i asked your name that you were the right one ♪ ♪ but you were not there when the morning came i had you all night long ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ i had you all night long ♪ ♪ i knew it all right when i asked your name

that you were ♪ ♪ the right one but you were not there when the morning came ♪ ♪ i had you all night long i knew it all right ♪ ♪ when i asked your name that you were the right one ♪ ♪ but you were not there when the morning came ♪ i know many of you see this election

as an unhappy choice between a longtime politician with no plan for the future and a billionaire with no government experience. well, let me tell you my story. my husband and i came here as newlyweds. we raised our family here and the california dream came true for me in ways i could never have imagined. now i'm running for governor to restore the california dream for everyone. i'm not a career politician or a hollywood star. i'm from silicon valley, where i created thousands of jobs at ebay. as governor, i'll do something that's been missing from california politics for far too long. i'll treat you like grownups, tell it to you straight, and offer a practical plan forward. these are scary times and i know that cleaning up sacramento won't be easy. our problems are tough, but so am i. if you want more of the same from sacramento, then vote for my opponent.