tv Jimmy Kimmel Live ABC May 11, 2011 12:00am-1:05am PDT
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stay coupled, visit abcnews.com/nightlight. thank you for watching. tune in to "good morning america" for latest on the flooding. see you tomorrow. tonight, on a new "jimmy kimmel live" -- >> maria signed irreconcilable differences. they are still trying -- >> i want to take pictures of you with your shirt of. >> romeo. >> you guy was make out ifkekeke
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>> jimmy: thank you, guys. thank you very much. i'm jimmy. i'm the host of the show. thank you. [ cheers and applause ] thank you. thank you for the applause and music and i tell you something, you make me feel like a real, live las vegas entertainer. it's tuesday night, judgment night on "dancing with the stars" and they really milked it. before the results show, they did a special where they recapped the greatest performances ever. they recapped a recap show. and now i'm about to recap that for you. the five dancers remaining, romeo, who used to be little romeo before he got big was forced to button his shirt and go home. he is on his way over with his partner, chelsie hightower to chot about his elimination. when your name is romeo, you have to expect that something
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bad is going to happen. and other celebrity news, the schwarzeneggers are splitting up. the gov noer and his wife marina shiver announced they are separating. sources say they stopped communicating. i'm surprised they ever communicated. and marina never lived up to the three-breasted woman from "total recall." marriage between a human and a cyborg is very complicated. arnold never got over his first love, himself. they released a statement citing irreconcilable differences. do you have to cite your reason
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when you are marrieded to arnold schwarzenegger? he has a profile of match.com. ex-governor. let's get it on. recently terminated. bd top, athletic, loose skin like a deflated balloon. smokes giant cartoon cigars. about what i'm looking for. hello, i am the former governor of california. i'm a fun loving mr. olympian looking for a lady girl to laugh at funny jokes and inject vitamins in my tushy. you know, if arnold and charlie
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sheen joined forces, we could have a problem. thankfully, our current governor is still mayored to his wife of 20 years, foxy brown. they have three beautiful children, charlie, bobby and buster. let's keep our fingers crossed for them. what would happen if the obamas split up? would he have to move out of the white house? one bedroom with 27 secret servicemen. in happy marriage news, prince william and kate middleton started their honeymoon. in that time, kate has showed grocery shopping. the honeymoon location surprised a lot of people, they are stays at the red roof inn off i-5.
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they are hoonny mooning in the the seychelles. but assseychelles office of toum decided not to keep it a secret. uncle frank has been all over the world. >> deaf thitly. >> jimmy: here is uncle frank. >> what i want to talk to you about, say cheese. yuan when you take a photo, they say, say cheese. i didn't say cheese. i say -- i go, coo coo and the same expression comes out. you say, say cheese and i say,
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coo coo! [ applause ] >> jimmy: i knew you would nail that one. uncle frank has a side job with the coco puff people. in arirn, ahmadinejad's associates have been arrested and charged with being magicians. apparently there is bad blood between the elected lead and the ayatollah. ahmadinejad is accused of having special powers, marking connections with unknown worlgdss. if you are keeping score at home, it's believe in genie, 0, believe in the holocaust, 0.
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pakistan officials criticized the united states for killing bin laden without giving them a heads up. like a husband who accuses his wife of going do zboo his e-mail to fouchbd out he has been having an affair for five year w bin laden. [ applause ] by the way, after osama bin laden was killed, president obama's approval raiting has gone up. and now it's down again. we are so fickle. who have you shot for us lately? this is a cute video of a boy named elliot experiencing his first kiss on videotape. >> you kiss me and i kiss you. >> i will kiss you. >> it's a kiss. >> she was like, debating. >> hey, hey! >> we kissed on the lips!
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whoo! guess what? me and her kissed on the lips. whoo hoo! >> no more. >> yeah! >> jimmy: hey, you too. get a tree house, will you? that is just like my first kiss except there was no video camera and no girl. shooting for season four of the "jersey shore" has been delayed. they are in italy shooting. apparently, snooki crawled into a cannoli and they can't find her. the permits were revoked because the president of italy is visiting -- do they realize the kids need to get crazy and loud?
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if you are shooting over seas, bin laden's house is available. speaking of, the situation, you know this guy? he signed a deal to shoot a pilot for his own show. and we will see the situation like we are always see him before. he joins snooki, j-woww and pauly "d." also getting a spin off, the "jersey shore" hot tub, about a filthy hot tub. elsewhere, bristol pailin will star in her own show on the biochannel, they specialize in shows nobody wants to watch. i was wondering when they would
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get one of the palins on tv? shouldn't john mccain get a cut? bio just released a promo. it looks familiar to me. >> one single girl, 25 sing the guys and not any sex allowed. not in the hot tub, not in bed or the fantasy suite. the bachelorette only on bio. >> jimmy: as long as there is no dancing it will be fine. speaking of, there is speculation she may have been the recipient of cosmetic surgely. this is a photograph from a few months a guy. and last week. it looks like her chin is more -- maybe she fell off a snowmobile. and this is her as she morphs
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into patricia heaton. another celebrity mom, alicia silverstone just had a son. and she named that son bear blu. b-e-a-r-b-lu. they shouldn't be allowed to name the child until the epidural wearing off. bear, share with apple. bear is a good name for a 280-pound alcoholic. not a vegan in draw string pants. the app ra winfrey show is coming to an end. there are only 11 shows left.
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i hope you are stocked up on duct tape and bottled water. today's show was the ultimate weight loss finale. and tomorrow is the weight gain back finale and followed by the definitely weight loss. and then found a half gol lon of ice cream in the freezer and it an it while watching my finale. the show featured 100 people who lost more than 100 pounds. and all of the people were named oprah. it's a nice thing that oprah did. but as usual, when it comes to open what ra and weight, i worry about the message. >> 100 multiple viewer, each lost 100 pounds. a morbidly obese doctor. the most talk toed about guest in 2 25 years.
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>> you are able now to lead a normal life. and the set today is made out of 100% pure chocolate. next oprah. >> jimmy: that, you know, that's oprah for you. when we come back, we're going to play a fun, new game. there is a souvenir shop down the block from us. the parking lot security guard guillermo is hidden and we are going to randomly select somebody to go in there and find him. and then we'll bring out the guests. that's how it's going to work. nathan fillion is here, from "dancing with the stars," romeo and chelsie hightower will be with us. we have music from calle 13, and we'll be right back to play stick around.
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if you don't have an iphone, you don't have ibooks. so you don't have your favorite books in your pocket and you don't have the ibookstore, an entire bookstore in your pocket. so whether you're looking for a certain author, or a new york times bestseller, a good book is just a tap away. yup. if you don't have an iphone, well, you don't have an iphone.
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>> jimmy: hi, everybody. i wasn't paying attention. on the program tonight, fresh from elimination on "dancing with the stars," romeo and his partner chelsie hightower are with us. you can applaud [ applause ] you know, romeo's father, master p, was on "dancing with the stars." somehow he managed to make it to week four without ever actually dancing. he just kind of stomped around, like frankenstein. but his son danced. and then, a hugely popular, grammy award-winning band from puerto rico, this is their latest album -- "entren los que quieran," which good? did it sound good? thank you. means "those who want to come," calle 13 from the bud light outdoor stage. [ applause ]
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finally, four years of high school spanish are paying off. you can see calle 13 live on thursday at club nokia here in los angeles. tomorrow night we'll be joined by chris o'donnell, ginnifer goodwin, and music from zac brown band. and thursday, kate hudson, windell middlebrooks, and raphael saadiq. please join us for that. hey, we have -- we're going to try something here. we have a fun game. we don't know how it's going to go but we will try it and see. right next door, in hollywood there is a souvenir shop where you can buy stuff, crap. and we are going play where in the world is guillermo. there is my cousin sal next to the hollywood land experience. how you are?
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>> good. >> jimmy: your hair looks good. you are outside on the street. and i hope that we have some pedestrians on the street. >> you are going like this girl. this is lakeisha. >> jimmy: where are you from? >> i'm from detroit, michigan. >> jimmy: what do you do? >> i'm in a 40us keeper at an elderly facility. >> just so you know that is not a blemish. it's a piercing. >> jimmy: what is? >> it's like bubble gum. >> jimmy: do you have a thing in your face. >> yeah, it's a piercing. >> jimmy: what do you old people at the place say about that? >> at work, i have to wear a band-aid. >> jimmy: so every day at work
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wear a band-aid on your face? >> yeah, isn't it horrible? >> jimmy: it's worth it for that pink dot. you are fwlar guillermo? >> no, i'm not. >> jimmy: you are a regular viewer of the show. here is a picture. >> he is not as fit -- >> he is hand some. quiet down, everybody. >> jimmy: do you want to sniff the picture to see if you can find -- your job is to find him. he is hidden in the store. are you ready to do this? >> absolutely. >> jimmy: go in there and walk around. and see if you can spot him. we are looking for geeguillermo. have you fwln befoen there befo?
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>> no, i have not. >> jimmy: it's a nice stuff. cousin sal will help guide you a little bit. keep walking around. we will tell you if you are getting hotter or colder or whatever. do a little -- >> i think i so something, guys. is that guillermo? >> jimmy: no, just pair of legs. see you elvis memorabilia. he is very hot. see if your name is on any of the mugs or license plates or anything like. >> no way. >> no. >> jimmy: okay. sal, is she -- why don't we tell her if she is getting warmer. not warmer.
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>> jimmy: the sign says, guillermo is not in here. >> i guess she is on vacation from picking things up. all right. we're looking around. oh -- well. is that -- >> there he is. >> jimmy: no, that just a cardboard cut out of him. that is not michael jackson either. >> you are colder, you are colder. very cold. still cold. >> jimmy: he is not in the calendars. he is not folded up in the calendars. he is not hanging in the wrack of foins. is that him -- >> there he is!
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>> jimmy: no. it's not -- >> that is close enough. >> jimmy: that is not him. that is not guillermo. you can put the jacket down now. are we getting warm center. >> very warm. you are on the equator right now. >> there he goes. >> i think she found him. >> jimmy: yeah, that's him all right. guillermo, it's okay -- is he alive? >> there he goes. >> jimmy: smash that thing open with a hammer. see if he is alive? guillermo -- cousin sal, what does she win? >> a best dog sitter award. >> jimmy: congratulations. thank you for playing. we will be back with nathan
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>> jimmy: welcome back. still to come on the show, calle 13 will be here and romeo and chelsie hightower. our first guest is a beloved star of television and former canadian who writes novels, solves crimes and charms all who cross his path as castle on "castle," the season finale of which airs monday at 10:00 on abc, please say hello to nathan fillion. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] how are you? >> i'm well. >> jimmy: it's very good to see you. >> thank you.
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>> jimmy: everything going well? you are done shooting for the season? >> yeah, we wrapped up season three. i am on vacation. i have been looking forward to it for a long time. >> jimmy: what have you been doing? >> i have been staying home. there are things around the house that need to get done. i installed a dead bolt on my back-door. i wouldn't install on the inside but the backside. finally, i got a chance to get on top of stuff. and i'm thinking, what am i going to do today? and i look outside the bedroom window, a sliding door to the grass. there is a big mound of dirt. that is odd. next morning a huge mound of dirt next to it. i got a gopher. so i go on the internet and i go
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to a store and get these traps. is no catch and release program for gophers. >> jimmy: i think there is just catch. >> and i'm confounded -- first of all, the traps they are completely medieval. i don't know -- mouse trap, just goes like this. these things, bing, they will catch you. >> jimmy: a cage thing? >> no, spikes that come down and spears that -- i'm terrified setting them. >> jimmy: you know the goffers are sitting there laughing at you hoping something terrible happens. >> you have to tear apart your lawn just to set them. i set a trap down, hole next to it. i put a trap in one hole. he set it. he knocked it. >> jimmy: tripped it?
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>> thank you. >> jimmy: you're welcome. >> three times in one night. i said that's it. i put a blanket down. i had a camouflage blanket over the top of me. and i'm out there with a flashlight. >> jimmy: when? >> theis is last night. your people are wonderful people. they said, you ready for the appearance tonight? and i said slept through it. >> jimmy: what time was it? >> it was 2:00 in the morning when i went out there. >> jimmy: no, really? >> i got a garden shovel and i'm holding it. i got a string and the other string to to a trap. i don't know what i was planning. and finally, i said, this is ridiculous. i came inside just before the sprinklers came on. >> jimmy: how long were you out
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there? >> probably 40 minutes. >> jimmy: really? >> i was looking for a closure to the escapade. i wake up this morning, and i have a phone call. and i go out to the pool, there is a dead gopher in the pool. >> jimmy: how did that happen? >> one can only guess, jimmy. but i would like to say that whole experience taught me something valuable. >> jimmy: what is that? >> never swim alone. >> jimmy: that is good for humans as well as gophers. on your twitter -- you have a lot of twitter followers. and they are hard core followers followers. april fools' day, you told them the show was canceled.
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you said, sad to see it again. cross your fingers for movie projects. how did they react? >> people were disappointed. i had a choice, do i say it's been canceled or there is going to be more "fire fly." i said, i would rather deal with "castle" fans or the other fans thinking there is something going to happen and not. >> jimmy: there is a third option, neither of those things. you sent another tweet that said, went to find my cat this morning. looks like coyotes found him first. and then you posted this picture of your alleged dead cat. what is that? >> this is all fur from his shedding prush. there is his collar. there is a gadget i use to track
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him. and this is just heinz ketchup. and twitter flagged it. they said, careful, you are about to see something that people think is offensive. >> jimmy: this is not your cat? >> no. >> jimmy: do you have a cat named spartacus? >> i do. >> jimmy: he is not dead? >> no. >> jimmy: have you done modeling before? >> no. >> jimmy: i'm going to take pictures of you with your shirt off. the season finale of "castle" airs monday at 10:00 pm on abc. we'll be right back. ♪
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>> this is me circa 1994 living in new york city. i was roller blading were exercise. it was cool back then. and i just stopped to see a broadway show. they said there are two secretaries left to see the show. and on my way out, i was getting ready to go -- that's a fanny pack. >> jimmy: yeah. it sure it. >> i had knee surgery there. >> jimmy: you are not posing in the picture? >> that may be a pose. not going to lie. >> jimmy: you were young and tough in a street gang. >> i don't think a lot of people will call that posing. >> jimmy: but you have not done a lot of modeling? >> except for that. >> jimmy: the season fin lal any, richard castle, does he
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think of switching to dick? you know, i mean the nickname? >> i think i know what you mean. >> jimmy: that is not a proposition. just curious. >> it's odd. you know what? i tend to answer to the name castle now. people say castle and i look up. but on the show, they rarely call me richard. >> jimmy: yeah, because that's the name of the show. >> when someone saying richard, you could be in trouble. when they say dick, who knows. >> jimmy: if you take a vacation ireland or something, you would be spinning in circles. >> they have a lot of castles in ireland. >> >> jimmy: that's where i
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want. >> you were walking everybody along. >> jimmy: will you take a nice vacation? >> i love the warmer climates. the tropical islands. i love going to the hawaiian islands. >> jimmy: the islands of hawaii. yes. >> everybody speaks english. it's a nice -- all i want to do, it's a nice -- i want to relax. hit the beach. i want to read a book. i like to get a place with a kitchen. i like to do my own barbecuing. >> jimmy: maybe through a dead bolt on the hotel room door. kill some of their local pests. you know? >> they have something like a snake hunting brigade. >> jimmy: i don't think there are snakes in hawaii. >> not supposed to be. >> jimmy: bring some snakes. >> i'm going to work on that.
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>> jimmy: the season finale of "castle monday nights. richard castle in the flash. we'll be right back with romeo. [ cheers and applause ] to increase its profile is sculpted for optimal aerodynamics... it reduces wind resistance, in an irresistible sort of way the all-new ford focus with up to 40 miles per gallon highway
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>> dicky: the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series, sponsored by bud light. to stream off-air performances and other music videos, go to jimmykimmellive.com. ♪ hey, dad, think i could drive? i'll tell you what -- when we stop to fill it up. ♪ ♪ [ son ] you realize, it's gotta run out sometime. ♪ you can take the heat. 'til it turns into heartburn, you've got what it takes: zantac. it's strong, fast lasting relief. so let them turn up the heat. you can stop that heartburn cold: (sssssssss!!!) zantac.
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>> jimmy: hi, everybody. ten seasons after his father, master p, nearly destroyed ballroom dancing, our next guest has cleared the family name by not following in his footsteps, he is the seventh celebrity eliminated from this season of "dancing with the stars." along with his dance partner, chelsie hightower, please welcome romeo. [ applause ] snow ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ]
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>> jimmy: it's good to see you. you guys both smell good. did you take showers or something? >> it's our natural scent. he always has a bunch of cologne on. >> don't moteling -- >> jimmy: you should bottle that and sell it to people match what do you have on your stomach? >> this is no limit, my record company. >> jimmy: your record company? >> yeah, my father passed it down. >> jimmy: he did? any father never gave me a record company. how did it work? >> like a prince and a king.
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he passed it down to me. my dad started it from nothing. >> jimmy: was there a ceremony? >> "dancing with the stars." >> jimmy: are you disappointed you are eliminated? >> i thought it was my best dance last night. >> we came out and did the best we could do. and we go out with peace. >> we went out with a bang. >> jimmy: but you had, ralph macchio had the sympathy vote because he hurt himself. do you wish you hurt yourself? >> i was prepared to did that this week. i said, i'm going to fall on the ground, you are going step on my ankle. i was planning on going to the hospital or something. >> jimmy: you were just a little too late. have you spoken to your dad?
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did you break the news? >> my dad called me early this morning and gave me an inspirational speech. he must have been psychic. i didn't talk to him yet. >> jimmy: he is not watching the show? >> i don't know if you are that cool, kimmel. he is probably watching the show. >> jimmy: i meant "dancing with the stars." i remember when your dad couldn't put on the dancing shoes. he was in a dance competition and couldn't wear the shoes. >> he is the master of promoting things. he was wearing the shoes from our clothing line. he thought it was a big deal. you thought he was stubborn? >> jimmy: i thought the shoes looked ridiculous and he didn't want to wear them. >> he is the best dancer in the
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family. >> jimmy: he is not. >> he didn't want to outshine me. >> jimmy: chelsie, you wouldn't have tolerated not wearing the shoes, would you have? >> i don't think that could have passed. i tried to get him in cuban heels. he wouldn't have it. >> i am supposed to be excited about cuban heels? >> jimmy: no, cuban sandwich, maybe. people want to know if there is any kind of romance. not for lack of trying on your part, romeo. you even kissed chelsie on the show which was a surprise to you? >> yeah, imkate of of the nowhere. >> jimmy: you guys got a 10 for that thing. you did consider making out for the rest of the show? >> i wish we would have did
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that. we should have made it. >> jimmy: you guy was make it now if you want. i will sit here -- >> we can? >> yeah. >> come on. let's -- >> jimmy: well, i'm sad to see you guys go. i think you were entertaining. >> we have to celebrate. my movie -- magical numbers. i want to thank everybody for supporting my new movie. >> jimmy: so it did work out for you. and we have to go outside to guillermo for the burning of the capezios. tonight, you were eliminated from "dancing with the stars" and now your shoes must pay the price. guillermo? america has spoken, and your dance card has been punched. the only one that is happy, the shoes got burned. "dancing with the stars" mondays at 8:00 and tuesdays at 9:00 here on abc. romeo and chelsie.
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