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tv   Jimmy Kimmel Live  ABC  February 4, 2012 12:00am-1:05am PST

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hangover is not. for "nightline," i'm linsey davis, in new york. >> drink responsibly. thanks for watch 3q
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i'm still here and so is bp. ♪ my heart skips a beat ♪ my heart is playing tricks on me ♪ [ female announcer ] introducing new special k granola bars. ♪ i can't break through with 4 grams of protein. and 4 grams of fiber. finally, a granola bar that makes your heart skip a beat. a snack that loves you back. what will you gain when you lose? ♪ ...skips a beat >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live."
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tonight -- kiefer sutherland. bear grylls. and music from young the giant. with cleto and the cletones. and now, as far as i know, here's jimmy kimmel! ♪ it's jimmy kimmel live [ cheers and applause ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hi, everyone. thank you. nice to see you. that's very nice. i'm jimmy. i'm the host of the show. thanks for watching. thank you for -- [ cheers and applause ] braving the elements to be here with us tonight. i'm glad you're in a good mood. it was not such a -- it rained today, which we don't usually allow in l.a. but the guys outside in the spider-man costumes needed a wash. so, it worked out. we got three-quarters of inch of rain today. it was scary. one of my arms got wet on the way. [ laughter ] it should be nice tomorrow. it's supposed to be sunny and almost 80 this week. just in case anyone needed another reason to hate us. [ laughter ] some parts of new hampshire and
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michigan got down negative 6 tonight. areas of utah got 28 inches of snow over the weekend. there were hundreds of car crashes in utah. this is from bountiful, utah. someone had the good sense to videotape this. we appreciate this sort of thing. look at this. this is a street where cars were just crashing over and over and over again. people were walking out in the middle of the street. you know, the general rule is -- accelerate as you steer into the skid. by the way, shouldn't that snowplow have been plowing snow? [ laughter ] if you want to make it on youtube, the best thing to do is careen wildly into the bushes. i mean, it's absolutely crazy. watch this one. ooh. anyway, it was the best episode of "abc's winter wipeout" yet i think. that's crazy. the match-up for super bowl xlvi is set. the new england patriots will face off with the new york giants in a rematch of super
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bowl 2008, xlii, i guess. [ applause ] i tell you what, i'm personally just glad we're going to hear about the often overlooked new york/boston sports rivalry because -- the giants are in their spot with the road win over the 49ers in san francisco. this is pretty good. this is from espn "sunday nfl countdown" show before the game. former minnesota vikings wide receiver cris carter gave his thoughts on quarterback alex smith from -- well, here, i'll let him take it. >> i feel a lot more confident about alex since he settled in. with harbaugh. when they get a major weapon. if you look at steve young and joe montana, their success was tied to the weaponry they put around them. you put the same type of weaponry around him, i'll have far more confidence. >> jimmy: see, that's where weapons grow, on a weapons tree. you put those around him. [ laughter ] numerous weapons will sprout. the baltimore ravens lost a heartbreaker yesterday. their kicker, if you didn't see
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it, missed an easy field goal. would have sent the game into overtime against the patriots. obviously, the players were upset. i don't think any of the players were as upset as this ravens fan we found on youtube today was. >> it's like the worst luck ever. >> [ bleep ]. >> you're kidding me. >> [ bleep ] [ bleep ], you piece of [ bleep ]. you've been all reliable all [ bleep ] season. get the [ bleep ] out of my house right now. don't want to hear [ bleep ] from any of you. you guys are [ bleep ] [ bleep ] [ bleep ]! get the [ bleep ] out now. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that's so ravens. [ cheers and applause ] i've been there myself. i really wish -- i wish we could make that guy our next "bachelor." i know they probably wouldn't go for it. [ laughter ] instead of giving roses, get the [ bleep ] out. the patriots brought their big gun out to sing the national anthem yesterday. hometown favorite, steven tyler
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did the honors. and here's a taste of that in case you missed out on how that went. ♪ the land of the free ♪ yeah >> jimmy: you know, i think the problem was he didn't make it his song. you got to make it your song, you know? [ laughter ] what was he wearing, by the way? what kind of an outfit is this he has on? you know, i make a lot of jokes about steven tyler looking like an old woman. but he's now wearing bedazzled scarfs. he looks like something you pull out of elton john's shower drain. honestly, something your grandmother would wear. [ cheers and applause ] after the game, fox ran an episode of "american idol." and this was the highlight. it's time once again for steven tyler's creepy leer of the night. ♪ you know how i feel
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>> mm. [ applause ] >> jimmy: they are going to have to put some sort of safety glass between him and the contestants. i watched some of the "american idol" last night. these audition episodes, they become so predictable. a contestant comes in. whenever you see they have a crazy look in their eye, you know their singing is going to be bad. whenever someone comes in with a heartwarming story, you know they're going to be good. as soon as you hear ryan seacrest say, as she waits for her audition, cassie richards is trying to overcome a case of nerves. but overcoming obstacles is nothing new for cassie. can i get some sad music? ♪ when she was 3 years old, cassie's dad died in a water balloon accident. she was 5, her mother was abducted by clowns. at 8 years old, cassie donated her liver to her brother. but before doctors had a chance to do the transplant, her liver was eaten by the family dog. and now she's here for one last
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shot. [ laughter ] and then cassie sings like an angel. just once, i would like her to suck after the story. yo, yo, i'm sorry your house burned down. but you can't sing. that's my randy jackson impersonation. thank you. [ cheers and applause ] i do -- i do them all. tomorrow night, i'll do my j. lo. it's fantastic. some of the contestants on this show are so bad, they don't even sound human. i've seen animals on youtube that sing better than some of these contestants on "american idol." we put together a game to prove that. we're going to play a sound. you have to guess whether the sound was made by an "american idol" contestant or an animal on youtube. it's a game we've cleverly titled "idol or animal." okay. [ cheers and applause ] why is it german techno music that goes with it?
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all right. here's our first sound. listen closely. all right. was that idol or animal? >> animal. >> jimmy: mixed group. all right. let's find out. ♪ >> jimmy: let's hear another one. listen. ♪ all right, was that -- idol. okay. let's find out. >> jimmy: that was an idol. all right. noise number three. [ laughter ] >> idol. >> jimmy: idol or animal? >> animal. >> jimmy: all right. we have a mix. but let's look. well, that's a dog, right? [ cheers and applause ] yo-yo dog. all right. let's hear the sound.
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♪ >> "idol." ♪ >> jimmy: all right. idol or animal? ♪ >> jimmy: we got one more. we have a couple more. all right. here. let's listen again. ♪ >> animal. >> jimmy: animal? okay. let's see. [ applause ] pretty good at this. a few more. ♪ >> "idol." >> jimmy: idol? all right. let's have a look at the videotape. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] parrots are tough. one more. we have one more. ♪ >> "idol." >> jimmy: you're saying "idol." and it is -- ♪
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kind of both. both answers. [ cheers and applause ] hey, speaking of animals, a new episode of "the bachelor" tonight, here on abc. tonight, bachelor ben continued to tongue his way through a flock of desperate young women. he took them on a group date. they went horseback riding and fly-fishing in park city, utah. during the date, a gal named samantha pulled ben aside to ask why she hasn't been getting much alone time with him. >> i wanted to talk to you because i've been on three straight group dates. and i don't know what that means. >> uh-huh. >> i really would like that one on one time and see if that -- like if it can get further. >> i have such crazy feelings for this guy. i feel like i should already have a ring on my finger. >> jimmy: well. needless to say, she was eliminated immediately. he didn't even wait for the rose ceremony. he cut her loose right there on the spot.
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one contestant who did get some one-on-one time with ben was rachel. she got to go on a helicopter ride. to me the interesting part of "the bachelor" is watching when the women who aren't on the solo date get together to say terrible things about the one who is. and i'll tell you what. for whatever reason, this date with rachel really brought out the worst in one of them. >> see you, girls. >> don't miss me too much. >> bye. >> what he does with them, i don't want to know. i don't want to see you in a helicopter with another girl. i don't. >> helicopter. >> oh, wow. really? are you kidding me? >> this came out of nowhere. >> they hate me now. >> jimmy: that's a wrap on the season, i guess. [ applause ] by the way, some big news for "bachelor" fans. the mansion they shoot "the bachelor" and "the bachelorette" in is for rent. it rents for $2,100 a night.
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as do most of the former bachelorettes, by the way. i said most. it's in sonoma. it can be rented whenever they're not taping the shows. the property has 6 bedrooms, 9 bathrooms and 8,000 square feet of crying space, if you're interested. by the way, this is -- you know, $2,100 a night, not bad. i mean, keep in mind, this is the place where jake pavelco met vienna girardi. this is pretty great. this weekend, showtime added a new member to their team of boxing analysts. a veteran named chuck. he made his debut from the palms hotel in las vegas. i think honestly i might have a new favorite sportscaster. >> also joining our broadcast team tonight, a man who had a long and distinguished career as a ring judge, over 3,000 fights judged, 132 of those were world championship matches. chuck will join us tonight to give us special insights. chuck, tell our viewers a little bit about what you're going to
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be doing on this broadcast tonight. >> thank you, al. tonight, i will be taking you inside the mind of a judge. tonight i'll be taking you inside the mind of a judge. [ bleep ] >> jimmy: well, he did what he promised. [ applause ] he took us inside the mind of a judge. there's no one in there. nothing in there. before we go any further, i like to wish each of you a happy chinese new year. [ cheers and applause ] last night, more than 1 billion people gathered in chinese times square, watching chinese ryan seacrest banter awkwardly with chinese will.i.am. [ laughter ] big celebrations in china last night. this morning, the president of china, hu jintao, was nice enough to tell his people what their new year's resolutions are going to be this year. [ speaking foreign language ] >> you will all lose five pounds
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by march. you also resolve to get organized. learn the harmonica. and be nicer to your mother-in-law. if you do not have a mother-in-law, one will be provided for you. that is all. >> jimmy: all right. well, that seems reasonable. [ applause ] and one more thing, you know, there's a big announcement from youtube today. they announced they're now averaging 4 billion views a day. they've had a 25% increase in viewership over the last eight months. which makes me wonder, does youtube get 4 billion views a day because people don't have jobs? or do people not have jobs because they're watching youtube 4 billion times a day? it's a lot of views, 4 billion. but when you see videos like this, it really makes sense. this is footage of a marine named adam and his friend, allen. they went on the giant slingshot ride at the magical midway park in orlando. adam was nervous about going on the ride. you'll see at the beginning, he
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asked the ride operator to give him a countdown before the ride starts. and you'll also see that request was ignored. >> here we go. here we go. [ bleep ] here we go. >> hey, can you give me like a countdown? [ screaming ] there was not a countdown. [ screaming ] what kind of countdown was that? [ screaming ] >> jimmy: he's right, wasn't much of a countdown. hopefully our enemies never have the power of the rollercoaster. we have a good show tonight. from "man versus wild," bear grylls is here. we'll be right back with kiefer sutherland. so, stick around. [ cheers and applause ] [ jennifer garner ] there's a lot of beautiful makeup out there.
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[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome back. thank you, fellas. tonight on the program, the host of "man versus wild." bear grylls is with us. [ cheers and applause ] and then with music from this, his self-titled album, young the giant from the bud light stage. you can see young the giant, they've got a tour starting february 8th at the fillmore in san francisco. if you want to see them. tomorrow night we'll be joined by elizabeth banks, from "southland." ben mckenzie, and have music from mindless behavior. and later this week, cuba gooding jr., andre agassi, j.b. smoove, sarah hyland from "modern family." and we'll have music from big freedia and from seal. so, please join us for those shows. it's been a year and eight months since our first guest stopped saving the world. it's a miracle that any of us are still alive. on wednesday night, he returns to fox with a new show called
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"touch." a special one-hour series preview airs wednesday night at 9:00. please say hello to kiefer sutherland. [ cheers and applause ] very good to see you. >> thanks for having me back. >> jimmy: it's always a pleasure to have you here. i'm glad you're back on tv. and by the way, i really liked your show. i watched it. we'll talk about that in a minute. >> thanks very much. >> jimmy: you were shooting all day today, right? >> got up at about a quarter to 5:00. >> jimmy: wow. you know, it's -- sometimes people -- >> i was just walking in. >> jimmy: on "24" i was in every single bit of that show. and maybe i should ease off a little. and you did not do that. >> i was doing a play in new york. and i was sent a script. when i found out it was a television show, i said, i'm not quite ready to go back yet. they said, trust me, you're going to have to read this. i did.
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around page 30, i went, well, in the jack bauer vernacular, i went "damn it." i knew i was going to have to -- i wanted to do this. >> jimmy: it's hard to complain because bear grylls, who's our next guest, gets attacked by wolves and that sort of thing on his show. >> no, i've watched him jump out of a helicopter or two. he's got a tougher grind than i ever did. >> jimmy: definitely. are you that kind of a guy? an adventurer? are you a camper or anything? >> not really, no. pretty much fake it. >> jimmy: you do, yeah. >> i think the last time i was camping, my oldest daughter wanted to try this outward bound program for summer. and part of the deal was at the end of everything that they learned, one of their parents had to go with them on this trip. and we climbed -- >> jimmy: it's mom's job, right? >> yeah. we climbed about 3,000 vertical feet. i showed up with all the proper equipment. i looked like the deal. and my daughter was 16 at the time. and after three days, i came limping out of the mountain, with a stick, barely clinging to
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life. and she was -- she was just kind of as light and effervescent as ever. >> jimmy: and you were just like -- >> kicked my ass. kicked my ass. that was the end of my camping career. >> jimmy: so, you don't do that sort of thing. you brought a photograph. before i show this, i like to ask you to take us through what was going on here. you were cooking? >> well, yeah. i was talking to someone earlier and they said, well what are you going to talk about on kimmel? and i just found it quite ironic that everything i had done as jack bauer for eight years and here, this is a picture i was making a thanksgiving dinner. and i wanted to deep-fry a turkey. i was telling some friends. i'd ordered this indoor deep-fryer, which i think right there is a dangerous idea. and so -- and i'm not very active on the computer. i'm not one of the 4 billion people that are on every day. >> jimmy: you're not. >> and so, but my friends are. and so they all brought over
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computers to show me how dangerous this was. i think i watched about four houses burn down and a couple kitchens explode. so, i got very nervous. the picture is what i actually ended up dressing up as to deep-fry the turkey. and it worked. >> jimmy: what are you wearing here? where do you get something like that? is that laying around the house? >> no, i bought those off eddie the beagle. >> jimmy: how small was this turkey? like a two-pound turkey. >> it was a five-pound turkey breast. >> jimmy: a turkey breast, okay. i think that's cheating. >> i think the bones make it more dangerous. >> jimmy: the only way to burn the house down is with the whole turkey that's still frozen on the inside. >> it's got to be frozen on the inside. apparently the water and hot oil are a dangerous mixture. >> jimmy: turkeys kill more humans than alligators i think. but they do it after they're dead. >> i think dennis hayesburg does the allstate ad or something like that. >> jimmy: this should be the plot of the "24" movie. you are doing a "24" movie, right? [ cheers and applause ] >> yeah, we're aiming to
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start -- thank you very much. hopefully mid-april. >> jimmy: start shooting it mid-april. any idea when it would come out? >> i don't. >> jimmy: will it be minute by minute like the television show? >> no, it's actually -- for us it's a great break. we will not do it in real-time. the 2-hour film will be a representation of a 24-hour day, which gives us -- all of a sudden jack bauer can get on a plane, you won't have to sit with him for the whole ride. >> jimmy: wouldn't it be awesome, though, if you actually had a 24-hour long movie? i mean, i bet -- i would definitely go to that. >> would you? >> jimmy: there's no question about it. >> you and i would be the only ones in line. >> jimmy: no, no. there would be about 800 other lunatics probably. you could charge a lot for the tickets. i mean, think of it that way. >> that's right. 120 bucks. >> jimmy: you'll be able to do things you couldn't do on television i would imagine. >> i think the vernacular has changed a little. jack bauer will probably swear. i think i'll probably only once. that's where we're at in the script now.
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that's 100% more than he ever got to do before. >> jimmy: you know, "stand by me," which is one of your first movies, which is a great movie. [ cheers and applause ] had a -- i guess over the summer, 25th anniversary of that movie. >> yeah. >> jimmy: and this is a movie that -- it's interesting because it seems like -- everyone's age grew up with this movie. i think parents passed it down to their kids. >> me, too. >> jimmy: did you with your kids? >> i was 18 when i made it. no, i grew up with it. >> jimmy: you grew up with it. you grew up on it. >> yeah, it was -- there's a sad memory for me just because i really -- i liked river phoenix so much. and he passed at such an early age. >> jimmy: yeah. >> and he was one of those wonderful young actors. he couldn't have been more than 13 or 14 at the time. and he was the one that would call you in your room every night and go, do you mind running over lines with me for the scene. >> jimmy: really? >> he just loved it so much. you could just see that he was going to be a really special actor. and he was. and it was just -- i -- just every time i think about the film i get very sad about not having him around. >> jimmy: well, that's a bummer. >> sorry, sorry.
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>> jimmy: no. but that's -- >> but i also -- i enjoy watching it because he was really such a -- such a special person. >> jimmy: i want to ask you about a story that's much lighter than that. but about jerry o'connell. >> uh-huh. >> jimmy: there's a rumor. and i want to ask you about this. because -- >> how do you know about this story? >> jimmy: i heard it from someone. but that he ate something while -- during shooting that he should not have eaten. >> oh, that's just the end part of the story. >> jimmy: oh, okay. all right. well, can you tell it to us? >> we were shooting in eugene, oregon. and they were having a hippie fair. i think he only saw fair and carnival and thought there would be rides. and i don't know how he did it. and you have to understand this is all i've heard, i wasn't there. >> jimmy: uh-huh. >> but apparently, he managed to tie his baby sitter up to the banister and snuck out for the evening and went to the fair and bought some cookies. and they were not the appropriate cookies for a 13-year-old on the run. and they found him crying in the
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park. he was lost and completely disoriented. and we had to shut down for two days. >> jimmy: wow. >> yeah. >> jimmy: that's sort of the -- >> he was stopped for a little while. >> jimmy: the director's cut. that's when you want a frozen turkey, you know? we're going to take a quick break. we'll talk about your new show, terrific new show, called "touch." the series premiere, wednesday night at 9:00 on fox. kiefer sutherland. we'll be right back. [ cheers and applause ] sergio! christina! question for you. what factors led you to buy your explorer. definitely the ecoboost option. what's pretty amazing is that you can get the fuel economy of a car in an suv. that basically did it for us. and the technology... oh, my goodness, the technology is amazing. everything is touch. you can actually talk to the car and it talks back to you. what have your friends said about your explorer? can we drive it? can we borrow it? what's your answer? no. no way. uh uh. (laugh)
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get some sleep. [ cell phone vibrating ] [ cell phone ringing ] [ cell phones continue ringing ] they're all the same number.
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how did you do that? [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that is the new show, "touch." kiefer sutherland is here. >> thank you. >> jimmy: i enjoyed the show immensely, i really did. >> thank you. >> jimmy: the idea of the show -- i think it's probably better if you explain it. >> it really centers around the relationship between a father and a son. my son has been diagnosed with severe autism. danny glover plays a scientist who informs me that he believes my son is misdiagnosed. and he's actually representative of a very small group of people around the world that actually are just much further evolved than we are. and they can see numbers and patterns that we cannot see that allow them to kind of have great insight into our past and also predict our future. it was based off a chinese fable called "the red thread" that says all the people supposed to come into contact with each other over the course of a lifetime are connected by a loose thread wrapped around the ankle.
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and the thread can stretch and bend but it can't break. we in our society have broken that thread. my son is using me to try to put all the pieces back together the way they should be. >> jimmy: it's very good, very interesting. >> thank you very much. >> jimmy: so, you're watching it in an unusual way because you're going to give a preview of the show. >> we're going to keep airing it till it works. >> jimmy: the show doesn't come on till march. >> we have a sneak preview on wednesday, the 25th. and then, we're going to -- >> jimmy: every two months you'll give another episode. >> till we get the number we want. >> jimmy: perfect. >> yeah, yeah, great plan, it's commitment. yeah, no, and then -- then we will put it out over the internet. there will be all kinds of ways to view it as well. and then we will do a global launch. we'll be the first show i think to open kind of worldwide all at the same time. we'll open europe, in asia. we'll open in south america. all at the same time.
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so, that people who are watching the show can actually communicate with each other. so, someone in africa can actually have a conversation with someone in belgium at the same time about the same show. and normally, that's been very difficult to do because of time zones, et cetera, et cetera. >> jimmy: so, it will be actually on in the middle of the night in some of the countries? >> well, no, not at the same hour. within the same three days -- >> jimmy: guillermo, will you get us some paper and pens because we have to figure this out. well, the show is not anywhere near as confusing like this conversation. when it's going to be on. it's very good to see you back on tv. kiefer sutherland, everyone. >> thank you very much. >> jimmy: wednesday at 9:00 on fox. we'll be right back with bear grylls. [ cheers and applause ] you think you take off all your make-up before bed.
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yeah, our low prices are even lower. we need to teach her how to walk. she is taking up valuable cart space. aren't you, honey? [ male announcer ] it's the red balloon clearance event. come in today to find 50% off our already low prices. at walmart. we tweet from here while we are on the road. we just be on our blackberry, yo, we're playing this, we're playing that. keeping our fans up to date. we have this thing just keeping us on track. we need tools... not toys. [ male announcer ] blackberry bold. be bold. how does one make such delightful cucumber sandwiches? frank's redhot sauce, your majesty. i put that (bleep) on everything. frank's redhot original. the perfect blend of flavor and heat. was that cinnamon you put in the dessert? yeah. little dash of nutmeg too. wonderful spice... nutmeg is. as spices go, i find nutmeg to be underutilized.
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[ cheers and applause ]
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[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hi, there. welcome back. still to come, young the giant. our next guest makes his living intentionally endangering his own life. he has a tv show called "man versus wild." and starting in may, he has a new live show coming to your city to possibly endanger you. it's called "mud, sweat and tears, live." please welcome the unkillable bear grylls. city to possibly endanger you. it's called "mud, sweat and tears, live." please welcome the unkillable bear grylls. [ cheers and applause ] [ cheers and applause ] how you doing? >> yeah, good, surviving. >> jimmy: thanks for coming. >> at least not under your desk this time. >> jimmy: i guess -- >> still putting the gum under there? >> jimmy: yeah, yeah, yeah. we did a little something, for those that didn't see, where you were trapped under my desk but you escaped. how's everything going? >> good. i've been kind of busy. >> jimmy: you do so much dumb
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stuff, it's hard for me to believe you're not american. you know? >> i've dropped on my head a lot at a young age. >> jimmy: how many seasons of your show "man versus wild" have you done? >> just wrapped season six of the show. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: when will you declare a winner? will there ever be a winner declared? or it will keep going? >> i'm slowly learning the wild is -- the wild really is a winner. >> jimmy: i think what people don't know about you is you have a family. you have little kids and a wife. and while you're off doing this crazy stuff, they're probably at home hoping you come back home, right? >> yeah. i got three young boys. jesse, marmaduke and huckleberry. and they're totally wild. >> jimmy: you decided to let them be endangered on the schoolyard instead of -- marmaduke, huh? >> well, marmaduke -- >> jimmy: you know that's a cartoon dog over here, right? >> i know. everyone in america says you can't call your son after a dog. in the u.k., marmaduke was a
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great world war i fighter pilot ace. >> jimmy: he was? >> yeah, he was. >> jimmy: so was snoopy, you know? >> but no, no. they're fun kids. they love all of this. >> jimmy: i bet they do. you must be the coolest dad that ever walked the earth, i mean, really. how could you ever tell them not to do anything? >> i'm always telling them not to do stuff. i came home the other day, i was doing a workout. and i said to jesse, listen, just fill up my water bottle. i'm outside, training. he comes back. and he's grinning and gives me the water bottle. i take a swig. he's peed in it. oh, you peed in my water bottle. what are you doing? >> he goes, papa, i saw you peeing in the snake skin. i said, look, do as i say and not as i do. he goes, you tell people to pee in the snake skin. it is a lost cause. i mean, their teacher said to me
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the other day, said, listen. it's all well and good marmaduke knowing how to take the doors off a helicopter and knowing how to repel out of it. but his mathematics is really suffering, you know? and part of me thinks, brilliant, because that's exactly what i was like as a young kid. the other part thinks, you've got to do the mathematics. >> jimmy: what does your wife think about it? >> she says, look, we've got to have a girl. she's telling me to wear tighter underpants for six months. >> jimmy: if you did have a girl -- >> i hate tight underpants. >> jimmy: you think that actually has some effect on the sex of a baby? >> apparently. i'm not the expert. he said, you've got to wear tight underpants. i've always gone commando since i was about 14. >> jimmy: i think she -- >> one of our crew said you can't go commando because his wife works in an old people's home. he said, she can always tell the people who have never worn underpants. so now, i'm trying to wear them a bit more. [ laughter ] not quite sure how we got on to my underpants. >> jimmy: you're working on
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things. >> yeah, yeah. >> jimmy: tell me about this live show. what do you do live on stage? i mean, to entertain people? do you kill anyone? >> we took it to australia. we've been back there. we've gone to the uk. we come here in may. beargryllslive.com. tickets available. it's fun. we swing from the rooftops, throw snakes around. >> jimmy: real snakes? >> yeah, real snakes. everest and military stuff. all that kind of how "man versus wild" came about. i get people up on stage. teach them how to do things. >> jimmy: do the snakes like being thrown around in the show? >> yeah, they're pretty cool with it. >> jimmy: they're all right with it? >> i'm always thinking one of these nights -- it's so annoying getting bitten by snakes. >> jimmy: yeah, it's a pet peeve of mine, too. >> it's so annoying. i was bitten by a nasty viper the other day in the jungle. and i made this camp up in the tree. and was settled down for the night. and i saw this tail go -- i just grabbed it and i was pulling it. it wrapped its head around the
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branch. i was pulling and pulling. it eventually, it pinged back. grabbed my hand. it was biting. i pulled off that. and it was biting itself it was so mad. anyway, worked out well because i had it for dinner. but the lesson is, you never grab a snake by the anus because it really does -- >> jimmy: my grandma used to say that, yeah. [ laughter ] >> she's a smart woman. but no, it's fun. we get people up on stage and teach them how -- teach them how to make fire. you know how to make fire? >> jimmy: i really don't know how to make fire. >> this is something every man should know. you got to know how to make fire without a lighter -- >> jimmy: first, you have to know how to make cotton balls. >> that comes out of the underpants. >> jimmy: all right. >> so, what we do -- you hold that. >> jimmy: okay. >> okay. so, that's the knife. >> jimmy: it's a knife. >> that's the fire steel. >> jimmy: it's not in your carry-on luggage, is it? that's a fire steel? >> okay, we just drive the sparks. >> jimmy: whoa.
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>> into that and you got fire. >> jimmy: we do have a fire. >> look, you can have a go. there you go. have a go at it. >> jimmy: yeah, even smells like fire. what's the idea here? what am i doing? >> you hold that like that. >> jimmy: just drag it? >> turn it the other way. and pull the fire steel. >> jimmy: stand back. everybody, stand back. i'm about to pull the fire steel. fire steel was my nickname when i was in a college. >> my 3-year-old huckleberry does this in a whistle. >> jimmy: maybe i shouldn't even try then. all right. here we go. [ cheers and applause ] >> okay. ah, look at that. fire. >> jimmy: put it out with his bare hands. baer grylls, everyone. "bear grylls, mud, sweat and tears, live" starting may 1st, new york city. tickets on sale now at his website. thank you, bear. we'll be right back with young the giant. [ cheers and applause ]
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[ cellphone rings ] hey honey! mom, we're dying. no you're not, you're just hungry. make some totino's pizza rolls. we don't have any! front... left, totino's. [ male announcer ] well done mom! less drama, more fun! totino's pizza rolls. here's a better idea... pillsbury grands! flaky layers biscuits. in just 15 minutes, the light delicate layers add a layer of warmth to your next dinner. pillsbury grands! dinner ideas made easy.
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the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series, sponsored by bud light. >> jimmy: this is their self-titled album. here with the song "cough syrup," young the giant. [ cheers and applause ]
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♪ ♪ life's too short to even care at all oh, oh ♪ ♪ i'm losing my mind losing my mind ♪ ♪ losing control these fishes in the sea ♪ ♪ they're staring at me oh, oh oh, oh, oh ♪ ♪ a wet world aches for a beat of a drum, oh ♪ ♪ if i could find a way to see this straight ♪ ♪ i'd run away to some fortune ♪ ♪ that i should have found by now ♪ ♪ i'm waiting for this cough syrup to come down ♪
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♪ come down ♪ life's too short to even care at all oh ♪ ♪ i'm coming up now coming up now out of the blue ♪ ♪ oh, oh, oh ♪ these zombies in the park they're looking for my heart ♪ ♪ oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪ a dark world aches for a splash of the sun ♪ ♪ oh, oh ♪ if i could find a way to see this straight ♪ ♪ i'd run away to some fortune
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that i should have found ♪ ♪ by now and so i run now ♪ ♪ to the things they said could ♪ ♪ restore me restore life ♪ ♪ the way it should be i'm waiting for this ♪ ♪ cough syrup to come down life's too short to ♪ ♪ even care at all, oh ♪ i'm losing my mind losing my mind ♪ ♪ losing control ♪
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♪ ♪ if i could find a way to see this straight ♪ ♪ i'd run away to some fortune that i should have found ♪ ♪ by now so, i run now to the ♪ ♪ things they said could ♪ restore me restore life ♪ ♪ the way it should be i'm waiting for this ♪ ♪ cough syrup to come down

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