just like she did to your umbilical cord.

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>> dicky: from hollywood, it's let's see if we can get one past the defense. hut! go! here it comes! right on the numbers! boom! get it! spin! oh, nice hands! chest bump. ugh! good job, man. nice! okay, halftime. now, this is my favorite play. oh! i'm wide open. oh, fumble. fumble. don't want to fumble any of these. [ male announcer ] share what you love,

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"jimmy kimmel live!" tonight -- martin short. from "life of pi," suraj sharma. and music from ne-yo. with cleto and the cletones. and now, more than likely, here's jimmy kimmel! ♪ it's "jimmy kimmel live" [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you. well, that's very nice. welcome. welcome, welcome. i'm jimmy, i'm the host. thanks for watching. thank you for joining me here in california. i'm glad you're here, i'm glad you're alert and attentive. no one is texting, which is nice. that's a rarity. this is kind of interesting. they say for the first time since we started doing it, texting has started to decline. a new report has found that the average number of text messages,

cell phone customers in the united states sends has dropped from 700 a month on average to 675 a month. which is still a lot, but -- maybe texting is down because a lot of the people who text and drive are now dead. [ laughter ] or maybe it's just tiger woods isn't texting as much since the whole -- [ laughter ] it makes sense when you think about it. because 20 years ago, everyone sent letters. you would sit down and write a letter. make them a few pages long. because you have to send it. then we started sending e-mails and the notes got shorter, because you can go back and forth with people. after awhile, that seemed like too long, so, we moved to text and now we're just taking the next logical step, now we send nothing. [ laughter ] we finally realized we don't have anything to say to each other. [ applause ] thank you. a lot of the texts i get don't even have words. especially from my daughter. i get texts from my daughter that look like this. this is -- i think that means

"what's up, dad?" get these out of here. yeah, there we go. try not to breathe those in. justin bieber got pulled over last night while driving his ferrari through west hollywood. police became suspicious when they saw a mop driving a ferrari. [ laughter ] actually pulled him over for making an unsafe left turn and then they found out his registration was expired. so they gave him a ticket. same thing happened to me when i was his age. instead of it being a ferrari, it was a bike and instead of being the cops chasing me, it was my mother. but -- [ laughter ] tmz had a video camera on the scene. the guy got footage of the reckless driving. this is just before justin was arrested. [ laughter ] very unsafe. not only is he driving on two wheels, he's in the bed of the truck. "people" magazine has revealed their sexiest man alive for 2012 and the sexiest man alive is -- mtumbe otawabe, a farmer from ethiopia.

they did a very exhaustive search this year and they found -- actually, it's channing tatum -- >> no! [ laughter ] >> jimmy: guillermo really thought it was his year and i can't blame him. we have the cover. there's channing. and -- [ cheers and applause ] i'm happy for him. but i like to remind "people" that sometimes abs are on the inside, you know? big news from mtv today. vinnie from "jersey shore" is getting his own talk show. it will be called "the show with vinnie" and the plan is for vinnie to interview celebrities in his family's house in staten island. see, this is what we get for hoping staten island got their power back. [ laughter ] vinnie joins snooki, j-woww and pauly d among the "jersey shore" mates that got new shows. hard to believe the cast of "jersey shore" has had more

successful spin offs than the cast of "friends" but it's true. mtv is running promos for the new show. i don't know. it may turn out to be okay. >> from the producers of "jersey shore," comes a ground breaking talk show with your host, vinnie, talking to snooki, j-woww and pauly d with special guests like snooki, j-woww and pauly d. it's like everything you've ever seen. k "the show with vinnie," all new on mtv. followed by "sammi sits there." >> jimmy: that sounds good, too. i would watch both of those things. congratulations to vinnie. a reminder that those of you who are on facebook, this saturday, november 17th is national unfriend day, or nud, for short, you can call it nud, the n nuddening, nud heart with a vengean vengeance. it's up to you.

just eliminate any friend on facebook who isn't actually a friend. or, at least an acquaintance. facebook, i believe, has deluded the name of a friend. a friend is someone you had a special relationship with. now, it isn't. it's time to say good-bye in bulk. if you are wondering who to get rid of, i'm going to give you a few types to start with. start with people like this. the person who loves everything. this is the person who, no matter what they are doing, has to tell you how much they love it. "happy monday, my coworkers are my besties." "going to get fro-yo. and see wreck it ralph. loving life." to that person, unfriend. next on the unfriend list, this is the opposite of the woman above. this is the person that hates everything. this is that person who posts about how much everything is -- "ugh, wednesday." "ugh, thursday." "snl sucks." and so do you. unfriend! and here's one more. this facebook villain is possibly the most dreaded of them all. it is your mother. that's right. i don't think i need to explain this. your mother isn't your friend.

cut her loose, just like she did to your umbilical cord. unfriend her! and here's another trick. go to your friend page, cover up the names with your hand and just go down the list of pictures, anyone you don't recognize, unfriend them. by the way, since we started national unfriend day, two years ago, facebook has made it very difficult to unfriend someone. in fact, they changed the process every couple of months to make it more complicated. but this is how you you friend someone. click friends on your page. enter your so-called friend's name in the search bar if you can even remember their name. then, hold your mouse over the profile until the window pops up. all right, hold your mouse over friends until the box of options pops up. scroll down to the very last option, click unfriend and be done with that person forever. yes. it isn't easy, but it's worth it to not have to hear about their zumba classes anymore. if you go to our facebook page, facebook.com/jimmykimmellive, you can add a national unfriend day badge to your profile

picture. if you are participating in nud this year, you just click a button and it will add this logo to your picture. i sates, "i nud 'd." we are using facebook against itself. let everyone know they're on alert. don't feel bad if you get unfriended, too, because it goes both ways. all right. president obama held his first press conference today. since being re-elected. and, you know what, he just had fun with it. he really did. four years ago when obama took office, he established a system where citizens can petition the government and if a petition gets more than 25,000 signatures, he promised he would respond to it. so, after obama won last week, citizens in all 50 states filed petitions to secede from the union. the guy they supported didn't win, so, now they want their own separate countries, i guess. which is silly, but whatever. the state with the longest petition is texas, texas has more than 100,000 signatures,

which exceeds the minimum of 25,000. so, today, the obama administration, as promised, responded to this. >> hey. how you doing? i'm anthony caprise, president obama's special envoy for talking to the people from seceding from the [ bleep ] union. president obama got your little petition. he read it, he mulled it over and here's his response. nobody -- nobody is seceding from no union. nobody! you got it, texas? good. now, go eat some [ bleep ] barbecue or whatever the [ bleep ] it is that you do. he's barack obama, and he approved this [ bleep ] message. [ applause ] >> jimmy: he's got that, i guess. this is a good video. this happened in london. this is in the tottenham court road tube station. you can see an apparently drunk

businessman attempting to walk down the up escalator. luckily someone stopped to record this event. [ laughter ] as it occurred. most people just passed him by. some people had some things to say. this woman tried to -- actually tried to help him. she went back and tried to turn him around but the great thing is, she's trying to turn him around, the guy looks back at her like she's crazy, like, leave me alone, i'm trying -- and he keeps walking despite -- she keeps trying to stop him. eventually, she gives up and just leaves, but -- maybe he wasn't drunk. maybe he just can't afford a treadmill. i like to give people the benefit of the doubt. one more thing. there's a new study from the journal "trends and genetics," i don't know what it is, either. but they suggest that humans may be getting dumber. and get this, they spelled dumber with a b. [ laughter ]

morons. anyway. some geneticists believe we no longer have the evolutionary need to be smart, so we're apparently, humans lose intelligence as they gain reality shows about toddlers wearing makeup. and, but don't worry, we're still getting fatter. that, we are doing. we thought this study would be a good basis for one of our pedestrian questions, so, we went out today and asked a bunch of people out on the street, "are you stupid?" okay? the way this works is, we together will see a person, introduce him or herself, we'll all guess if they think they are stupid. all right? yes or no. let's begin. >> we're asking people on the street today, are you stupid? >> jimmy: yes or no? most everyone says yes. all right. keep in mind, this is in her opinion, all right? here we go. >> yes. yes, i am. [ applause ] >> jimmy: okay. all right. who else do we have? >> what is your name?

>> jeff. >> where are you from, jeff? >> tulsa, oklahoma. >> jeff, are you stupid? >> jimmy: no. jeff -- no, all right. let's see. >> mostly yes. >> all right, thank you, jeff. >> that's all you need? >> yeah, what are you, stupid? >> i am. >> jimmy: all right. thank you, jeff. next up? >> what's your name? >> michael. >> michael, where are you from? >> england. >> michael, are you stupid? >> jimmy: the glasses would indicate that, no, but who knows what his opinion of himself is. let's find out. >> no. no, i'm not stupid. why do you ask? i'm not stupid. never have been. never will be. >> superman! >> oh. >> jimmy: gullible. reactionary. all right. [ applause ] >> what as your name? >> erin. >> where are you from?

>> hickory, north carolina. >> and are you stupid? >> jimmy: is she? yes. wow. take it easy. all right. >> sometimes. yes. i can be. and i make really stupid decisions but it's cool because you only live once. yolo. >> jimmy: she's right. [ applause ] yolo. who else do we have? >> what is your name? >> john. >> where are you from? >> buffalo, new york. >> john, are you stupid? >> jimmy: is john stupid? everyone says no. okay. >> no, not at all. >> what makes you not stupid? >> book smarts. >> what sort of books do you read? >> uh -- smart. all right.

>> recent study came out saying that human beings aren't as intelligent as they once were. may i ask you a question? are you stupid? >> jimmy: very interesting. all right. let's, everyone says yes. >> i am not stupid. i'm very intelligent. >> can you prove it? >> ah -- sure, shoot. ask me a question. >> are you stupid? >> no, i'm not stupid. >> jimmy: all right, we have another. >> are you stupid? >> jimmy: wait a minute. pretty sure that's -- i'm pretty sure that's casey abrams from "american idol." yes? let's see what he says. >> yeah, i think so. i think everything is -- there's a lot of things in the world that make you stupid, you know, like, internet and tv and things. [ laughter ]

>> jimmy: i think we found him on the internet and tv, didn't we? all right. >> what is your name? >> thomas. >> where are you from? >> kansas. >> thomas, are you stupid? >> jimmy: is thomas stupid? most people say yes, a couple of nos. >> no. >> what's your major? >> ah -- kansas. [ applause ] >> jimmy: things have -- sometimes -- things have really gone downhill at harvard. we have a good show for you tonight. from the 3d movie "life of pi," suraj sharma is here with us. we have music tonight from ne-yo. and we'll be right back with martin short, so stick around. [ male announcer ] coughequence™ #8. waking the baby.

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>> jimmy: wow. magic. tonight on the program, like siegfried & roy before him, he stars alongside a tiger in the new movie "life of pi," suraj sharma is here. and then, with music from this new cd, "r.e.d.," ne-yo from the bud light outdoor stage. this is exciting. tomorrow night, the great mel brooks will be here, as will the great abc senior white house correspondent jake tapper and we'll have music from jason aldean, so, join us then, too. our first guest tonight is one of the funniest men alive. it says it right on his business cards. you know him from "snl" and most significantly, the stage. you can see him live december 16th at the marina civic center in panama city, florida. please say hello to martin short.

[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: what an entrance. it is always a pleasure to have us here. >> i love to be overwhelmed by love. >> jimmy: how is everything? >> good. i love doing this show. >> jimmy: you do? thank you. >> it's my favorite of the 47 talk shows. it's in the top four or five. >> jimmy: thank you. >> because of the responsibilsp. >> jimmy: of whom? >> our conversation. since you refuse to prepare. and i think it's your strength. >> jimmy: that it is. >> you're the honey boo boo of late night. >> jimmy: thank you very much. [ applause ] i've been eating a lot of cheese balls to prepare. well, that's -- >> i love -- >> jimmy: do you really? >> yes. the difference between her

family and the palins is teeth. and that's it. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: and a few pounds, maybe. >> and i think, by the way, i'm glad that you showed up. >> jimmy: thank you. >> considering that when that "national enquirer" story hit today. >> jimmy: what story? >> well, the one that says that you're dating general petraeus. i think it's just -- shocking. >> jimmy: i call him david. >> isn't this the greatest story ever? >> jimmy: it's not the greatest, but it's right up there. >> pretty amazing. paula broadwell is the biographer and then becomes his mistress. you know, and i now think of paula broadwell, some people are born great and other people have greatness thrust into them. and i think -- [ laughter ] i think -- thank you very much! don't leave me hanging. don't leave me hanging. >> jimmy: you have generals in canada? how does it work over there? >> yes, we do. we have generals. >> jimmy: what goes on? >> listen. we are a proud -- you know, we're the, canadians are the

aliens you don't deport. so, it's just -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i'm pretty sure they deport us. and you have a political system? there are -- >> yes, we have a political system. >> jimmy: do the moose choose the candidates? >> no, you know what it is? it's a drunken game of darts, you just, whoever wins becomes the king. >> jimmy: i like that. >> you got a bulls eye, you are king for the next ten years, eh? good on you. >> jimmy: the king -- actually, the queen of england is also the queen of canada. >> that's true. >> jimmy: she doesn't go by that. >> what do you mean? >> jimmy: why do you think that is? >> oh, no, well, because it's not so hip. because it's hipper to be queen of england. >> jimmy: you have met the queen? >> yes. i was just in london. i met the queen. >> jimmy: recently? >> yeah, yeah. i met the queen. i was invited to buckingham palace. and they were very excited because the potential pitter patter of little feet because andrew lloyd webber is getting another knighthood, so, they are -- [ laughter ]

>> thank you. >> jimmy: the drummer, it's like he took the night off. come on, jonathan. >> honest to god. no, no, she's very -- >> jimmy: can we go backwards for a second? before we talk about the queen, is this a vacation or are you summoned by the queen? >> no, no, my christmas gift last christmas to my three children was, because two of them are graduates of notre dame university -- >> jimmy: ah, nice. >> so, for the first time, notre dame was playing navy, but the first time ever they were playing in a stadium in dublin, in september, so -- >> jimmy: right. >> so, i flew the family over, we went to the game, 50-10, for notre dame over navy. and then, you know, then we went to ireland and then over to england. >> jimmy: that's a good trip. >> being a legendary canadian, i am knighted by canada and, but then i want to hear about you. and then i was invited to, and it's amazing. she's completely different than you think. >> jimmy: in what way? >> thick cockney accent. hello, mate!

don't put your feet on my table, that was from my granny. >> jimmy: that's the queen? >> she's 86, can still do the ping-pong ball act. >> jimmy: is that right? you might have just gotten unknighted. can you be unknighted? can they take that away? move the sword backwards? >> no, no, she's very hip. and prince philip is 91, as sharp as anything. there's not an anti-semitic joke that he can't remember saying. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: wow. >> he's very cool. >> jimmy: i didn't know that about him. >> very cool. >> jimmy: i had no idea about any of this stuff. >> yeah, yeah, yeah. >> jimmy: what else did you see while you were over there? did you go any other place? >> we went to short's bar. short's bar, since 1880. my father was one of 11 children. it's an hour and a half north of dublin. >> jimmy: oh, that's great. >> all the family is still there. one went to canada, my father, and one went to london.

but the others are there. >> jimmy: do they have photographs of you, do they have a big poster -- >> i'm very big. the whole thing. >> jimmy: that would be great. >> a lot of drinking. >> jimmy: a lot of drinking, yeah. well, that's what goes on over there. do the kids drink? did you get drunk with your children? >> my kids are 58 years of age. i mean -- >> jimmy: they're in college. >> they're about to put me in a home. >> jimmy: technically it's legal over there, but do you go along with that sort of thing. >> of course i do. my kids are in their 20s. they can drink. i don't care. >> jimmy: oh, they went to notre dame -- >> my son henry just graduated and he's the youngest. >> jimmy: so the whole family's drunk together. >> the whole family's graduated. we all went. >> jimmy: do you take them with you to florida? >> they don't want to go with me. jeff, you're very kind to let him out. >> jimmy: yeah, well -- >> how could you not? >> jimmy: he goes and plays with you. sometimes paul schafer plays you with. and sometimes jeff plays. >> jeff is, you know -- >> jimmy: is it true to say jeff is your second choice? >> um, no, there's another guy. so, he's third.

>> jimmy: oh, so, he's third. it's all right, jeff. not bad. you're in the top three. >> but listen, i want to congratulate you, i know that, i know you're upset about this election because -- >> why did you say that? >> you didn't get your country back. that's okay. >> jimmy: i think you might be thinking of another guy, but -- >> i know that you're a big -- >> jimmy: when we come back, i want to find out what you're -- [ laughter ] >> it's nothing we're doing. >> jimmy: when we come back, i'm going to talk about some, who knows. we'll be right back with martin short. >> wow. >> jimmy: yeah. [music] "dance of the sugar plum fairies" ♪

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...and it ain't for choir boys. >> jimmy: oh, hey, we're on television. >> oh, we're on television. >> jimmy: suraj sharma will join us, ne-yo, too, in a minute. now, what kind of a boy were you? and be honest, like, as a kid. were you hyperactive? were you -- >> i was -- i was, you know, i was always going to be in show business. i used to have an applause record and i used to have my own imaginary show in my attic. >> jimmy: really? >> yeah. i had a goose neck lamp and i would put it up. even then, i needed lighting.

and i used to pretend i had my own television show and i'd -- ♪ such a coo-coo day and i'd hit the applause and people were outside playing hockey and looking up -- and then i was a little neurotic. i remember, one time, i was 13 and i felt a lump at the base of -- and i know it's television, so, my ding dong. i felt it, i was like, oh, boy. >> jimmy: they just unknighted you again. double unknighting. you are actually technically a knight again. tell me about this lump. show it to us, if you would. >> oh. no, it was a little cyst. it was nothing. i didn't know that, and i was 13. i thought, oh, my god. this is serious. and i was shy, i didn't tell anyone. so, i went to the medicine cabinet and i got a bottle of this thing called dettol. i would later found out, they

would use, like, for a cap for a gallon of water to clean hospital floors. but i didn't know. so, i just -- poured it on there and then by day three there was a rash that just -- went like that. and i would be like, sorry, i can't play today, coach. you know? and -- [ laughter ] it was unbelievable. >> jimmy: did you tell anyone about it? >> finally, i got so -- it was so -- so i finally broke down to my father. i'm going to die! crying like lucy then, and so he went, oh, [ bleep ], you know, he was -- it's like, we say in canada, it made him -- if he had been a seamstress, he would have spit the pins right out. it was a startling moment. we went to the doctor. the doctor, oh, my goodness. he said, that's the scariest thing i've ever seen. >> jimmy: no, he didn't. >> and the rash isn't very good either. [ applause ] it looked like an aerial view of

versailles. it was just -- anyway, he gave me a cream or a salve or something and as i was leaving, i said, do i still put the dettol on? he said, you put the dettol on? that was horrifying. >> jimmy: do you miss your kids being little with the fun shenanigans? with their penises and stuff like that? [ laughter ] >> you know, it's so interesting you say that. no. [ laughter ] i miss -- my kids are in their 20s. i miss christmas. >> jimmy: you miss christmas. yeah, that is fun with little kids. >> that was the greatest thing in the world. i remember the most horrifying christmas i ever had was when my kids were, like, well, we had a baby and we had a 3-year-old and a 5 1/2-year-old, kat lyherine 5 1/2. my wife had pulled her back, so, she was now in bed and so, i said, don't worry, i'll take care of christmas eve. i'm going to take it, doing christmas and i'm running around and i'm bringing her sandwiches

and making sure the kids -- i was so exhausted because we had babies and the 3-year-old that finally my son oliver, who was 3, started to cry, and i kept saying to katherine, you know, you be good, you be good, or santa, you know -- and so, anyway, i -- oliver is crying, i get into bed with him, around 9:30, and i fall asleep and i forget to set up anything. and then in the morning, katherine comes in, says, "he didn't come!" "all your threats and your warnings and he actually didn't come!" [ laughter ] so, i just -- i ran out of bed and i saw that there were, like, boxes that i had planned to set up. >> jimmy: they weren't assembled? >> oh, no. there were stickers on them from macy's, you know? so, i said to her that i'd heard a noise in the middle of the night and i'd seen this fat man in a red suit and i wrasseled him and got all the presents away. >> jimmy: so your explanation was that you beat santa claus up

when he came? [ applause ] >> absolutely. >> jimmy: that's wonderful. >> she loved it. >> jimmy: it's great to see you. >> great to see you. >> jimmy: will jeff be with you in florida? >> yes, jeff is always there. we hang, we swing. >> jimmy: martin short and jeff, live in panama city, florida. thank you, martin. we'll be right back with suraj sharma. ,, let's see if we can get one past the defense. hut! go! here it comes! right on the numbers! boom! get it! spin! oh, nice hands! chest bump. ugh! good job, man. nice! okay, halftime. now, this is my favorite play. oh! i'm wide open. oh, fumble. fumble. don't want to fumble any of these.

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>> jimmy: well, hello. and still to come, ne-yo will be here. our next guest is a college student and first-time actor who beat out 3,000 other hopefuls for the starring role in the new movie "life of pi." >> ah! no! mine, mine! ahh! >> jimmy: "life of pi" opens in theaters in 3d november 21st. please welcome suraj sharma. [ cheers and applause ]

>> jimmy: first of all, your name is s-u-r-a-j. did i pronounce it correctly? >> yeah. >> jimmy: close enough? what's the right way, i want to say it correctly. >> it's hard. >> jimmy: it's hard? >> it's suraj. >> jimmy: suraj. suraj. >> yeah. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: all right, that reese clo that's close enough. and what part of india are you from? >> new delhi. >> jimmy: are there monkeys running around? >> there are. >> jimmy: i like cities that have monkeys running around. i like them from afar. i don't want to be among them. how big are the monkeys? >> oh, big enough. >> jimmy: too big. >> not too big. they can get big, but -- >> jimmy: they cause trouble, though, don't they? >> ah, no. i mean, you get used to them. >> jimmy: you do? >> well, we have this very rare study, behind, there's this

huge, kind of a jungle park sort of a thing, we call it the ridge. >> jimmy: okay. >> and we have monkeys there. >> jimmy: and there are monkeys there. >> and sometimes you get boxed in. >> jimmy: by monkeys. >> my troupes of monkeys, yes. >> jimmy: troupes of monkeys? are they armed? >> well, they come and look pretty armed, you have a baby on your back, all going down. >> jimmy: do they attack people? >> no. but they'll take your food. >> jimmy: take your food from you. >> yeah. >> jimmy: knock you down and take your food? >> snatch it out of your hand. >> jimmy: what do they eat? anything? >> anything. >> jimmy: anything you have? so, you're not able to eat really. that must be why you're so thin. >> no, you don't eat. >> jimmy: wow. so, you have -- and do they get inside, like, do you live in a dorm or, college, or do you live on campus? >> no, i live away from campus. no monkeys jumping into my house. unless my brother comes. >> jimmy: okay. i'm glad you brought your

brother up, because your brother is an actor. >> uh-huh. well -- yeah. >> jimmy: kind of, i guess. he's acted in some stuff. and, well, tell us how you got this part in this movie. great story. >> so my brother's acted in two movies before. and the casting director in my city, he called him for the audition and my brother was nervous so he said, suraj, please, please come with me, please come with me. so, i really didn't want to go because i was not going to audition, i was not interested. and he -- he bribed me, as such. >> jimmy: with what? >> with a subway sandwich. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: subway made it over there, huh? wow. >> got over there, and, yeah, they said, you know what, suraj, you're sitting around, not doing anything, might as well give it a shot. and i did. and, yeah, things went from, you know -- >> jimmy: and this was not just some little movie. ang lee directed this movie, oscar-winning director and he

picked you. you'd never been in anything before. >> no. very lucky. >> jimmy: i tell you what. i hear stories like this and it makes me think, if you're an actor, you should never bring your brother to an audition with you, because it always seems like the sibling that doesn't care is the one that gets it. now, is your brother happy that you got the part? >> he's been good about the whole thing. because he -- well, i was the kind of kid who hadn't really done anything, ever. >> jimmy: yeah. >> and, you know, it was a bad situation and i was all lost, and didn't know what to do. and, yeah -- >> jimmy: did you get the sandwich that he promised you? >> no, no. >> jimmy: you didn't? >> no. well, i went in for subway and i walked out with pi, so -- >> jimmy: you got dessert first. [ applause ] wow. is this your first time in the united states? being here? >> no. >> jimmy: you've been here before. >> fifth time. >> jimmy: oh, fifth time.

wow, so, you travel a lot. when was your first time? >> awhile back. >> jimmy: how old were you? >> 18. >> jimmy: oh, okay. all right. how old are you now? >> 19. [ applause ] >> jimmy: you are a stewardess? what's going on? >> no, i have work to do. you got to give this movie out to the people. >> jimmy: i got you. >> so, you have to come. >> jimmy: what do you think of the united states? what do you think of, like, l.a.? >> oh, that's funny. um -- i like it. i like it. >> jimmy: is it what you expected it to be? >> yeah, yeah. >> jimmy: it is. no monkeys. >> well, depends on what you categorize as a monkey. [ laughter ] ah, have you -- have you heard of this game called grand theft auto? >> jimmy: yes, of course. >> so, i'm flying over l.a. and i'm looking down and i'm really nervous, you know, first time coming to l.a., hollywood, all that, it's a little bit creepy.

so i'm flying over and i'm looking down and i'm going, huh -- that's the mini map. and -- >> jimmy: that's how you know l.a.? >> yeah, i mean, i'm in a cab, going down the streets and it's really sometimes feels like i'm flaying a video game. >> jimmy: that's a very strange way to -- so, do you know your way around? you haven't stolen any cars? >> sometimes you feel like, maybe you should -- >> jimmy: you should not do that. >> no, you should not. >> jimmy: that's illegal over here. i don't note about over there. well, congratulations to you. are you planning on acting more, is that -- [ applause ] do you want to be in other movies now that you've been in this one? >> well, i probably will act again. [ laughter ] but -- probably will act again, all right. >> but -- >> jimmy: but? >> i think i want to, you know, the thing that i like best about movies is that you're telling stories. you're dreaming all these dreams

and it's not just you, it's like the entire crew, everybody comes with their own skills and dreams and you form this big one and then you send it out into the world and maybe if you get lucky, it will touch someone's heart. so, i don't know if i want to act, but i do want to make movies in any way possible. >> jimmy: great to meet you. congratulations. great to have you here -- suraj -- forget it. suraj sharma. "life of pi" opens in theaters november 21st. we'll be right back with ne-yo.

>> jimmy: his new album is called "r.e.d." here with the song, "let me love you," ne-yo! ♪ ♪ much as you blame yourself you can't be blamed for the way you feel ♪ ♪ had no example of a love that was even remotely real ♪ ♪ how can you understand something that you never had ♪

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girl let me love you ♪ ♪ let me love you let me love you, oh ♪ ♪ i can see the pain behind your eyes it's been there for quite a while ♪ ♪ i just wanna be the one to remind you what it is to smile ♪ ♪ i would like to show you what true love can really do ♪ ♪ girl let me love you and i will love you until you learn to love yourself ♪ ♪ girl let me love you and all your trouble don't be afraid girl let me help ♪ ♪ girl let me love you and i will love you until you learn to love yourself ♪ ♪ girl let me love you a heart of numbness gets brought to life

i'll take you there ♪ ♪ girl let me love you baby hey! girl let me love you ♪ ♪ let me love you hey! everybody! let's go! for every heart that beats for every heart that beats for every heart that beats for every heart that beats heart that beats ♪ ♪ heart that beats ♪ heart that beats ♪ heart that beat ♪ beat beat beat ♪ girl let me love you and i will love you until you learn to love yourself ♪ ♪ girl let me love you and all your trouble don't be afraid girl let me help ♪ ♪ girl let me love you love you ♪ woo!