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tv   Jimmy Kimmel Live  ABC  January 9, 2013 11:35pm-12:35am PST

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afternoon we have to do it again tonight. i don't know what these people want from me. but so far, it seems to be going pretty well. last night, jennifer aniston broke my desk, and tonight ryan gosling is here to break my heart. [ laughter ] is there a cobra loose in the studio? and not only is ryan gosling here tonight, brad paisley is with us, too. [ cheers and applause ] which makes me the value price baloney in the handsome sandwich tonight. here's a potentially alarming story. scientists with the noaa have just released statistics that 2012 was the hottest temperature ever in the united states. the average temperature was more than three degrees hotter than average. yet somehow my fiancee is always cold. i don't know how that works. all 48 contiguous states had higher than average temperatures. if trends continue, all rappers with ice in their name could
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vanish. ice cube, vanilla, even coolio all gone. so the bad news is we're very close to living in a post-apocalyptic desert wasteland. the good news is we'll all get to ride around in really cool homema homemade dune buggies. on fox tonight, they aired a two-hour celebrity diving show called "stars in danger: the high dive." the show is based on a german format. anything based on a german format kind of scares me. the celebrities who signed up to dive included j-woww from "jersey shore." steven twitch boss from "so you think you dance." i don't know who that is either. terrell owens, kim richards, a real housewife of beverly hills, her sister, i guess who is also on the show, bethany hamilton, the surfer who got attacked by a shark, alexander paul from "bay watch." so they did get the big names. i think the only thing worse than being a celebrity
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contestant on a competitive diving show is being a celebrity judge on a competitive diving show. but why would someone want to be on this? is it a better career move to develop a heroin addiction and hope dr. drew calls? it was a lot easier to be celebrity 50 years ago when all you had to do was smoke and let the p.r. department of your studio send you on fake heterosexual dates. this will not be the only show to feature celebrities diving this year. fox grin lit this diving show after we at abc announced we were planning a diving show. that's not right. this was our terrible idea first, fox. and you -- well, you can't have it. meanwhile, on cbs tonight, the people's choice awards. the people's choice awards is basically an annual reminder that we have too many awards shows. daniel day-lewis for his portrayal of lincoln narrowly beat out carly rae jepson for
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"call me maybe." it's voted on by the people instead of academy members. that's all good until "battleship" wins best picture. our mayor in los angeles is in the middle of an uncomfortable controversy. over the holidays, the mayor was in cabo san lucas, mexico, where he either planned or happened to run into charlie sheen, who was down there opening a bar. charlie felt there was a shortage of bars in mexico, so he rushed down there to open one. but this is a photograph charlie posted on twitter. if you analyze the body language, the mayor is giving his best "okay, get away from me" smile. charlie has him in what i think could be described as a choke hold. or a two and a half nelson he has him in there. apparently they spent some time in there together. what's in question is how much time. each is giving a different account of what happened. the mayor is saying he ran into charlie at a hotel, but charlie said they spent almost two hours drinking in his room with "at least one porn star and several
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other hot women." yesterday the mayor was at a new art museum downtown and a reporter asked him to set the record straight. >> how are you, man? >> charlie said that you partied for hours. >> all i can tell you is i don't have anything else to say about that. i do want to talk about this, though, man. is this phenomenal? >> jimmy: not really. tell us about the women and the porn star. that's what we want to hear. now charlie is back pedaling on what happened. he changed his story today. he probably woke up this morning with a windshield full of parking tickets and thought i better go along with whatever the mayor says. but i would like to invite the mayor on the show to clear this up once and for all. i mean, if this stuff about the women and the partying is true, he could wind up being our next governor. [ laughter ] and then we could have a mayor charlie sheen. get those porn stars to work filling potholes. we're now nine days into 2013. how many of you made new year's resolutions?
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[ cheers and applause ] i have a unique, if not amazing ability -- i have an ability to guess what people's new year's resolutions are, just by looking at them. i'm like a resolution psychic. i'll show you. my cousin sal is outside on hollywood boulevard right now. >> what's happening, jimmy? how are you? [ applause ] >> jimmy: you have some pedestrians standing by? >> yeah, you're the psychic, you should know. >> jimmy: all right, bring somebody in here. let's see who we have. first of all, i would like you to confirm, sir, that we have never seen each other or spoken before, correct? >> correct. >> jimmy: so i know nothing about you. >> no. >> jimmy: what is your name? >> jose. >> jimmy: where are you from? >> dallas, texas. >> jimmy: okay, i will now guess your new year's resolution, jose. what do you do for a living? >> i am unemployed. >> jimmy: okay, your resolution is to get a job. is that right? yes. [ cheers and applause ]
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>> how is this one? >> jimmy: hello there, what's your name? >> hi, i'm jessica. >> jimmy: what do you do for a living, jessica? >> i'm a model. >> jimmy: you're a real model? >> i am. >> yeah, right. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: all right, jessica, your resolution is to put on 35 pounds. >> actually, i do want to try to stop working out so much. >> jimmy: that's my new year's resolution also. thank you, jessica. that's 2-2. [ applause ] >> jimmy: hey, how you doing? >> great, you? >> jimmy: good. what's your name? >> clayton. >> jimmy: where you from? >> atlanta, georgia. >> jimmy: what do you do for a living? >> i am a production assistant on "the walking dead." >> jimmy: that's a fun job to have, surrounded by mummies and whatnot. your new year's resolution is to stop telling girls you're in
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mumford & sons. >> it's a good one. >> you're a genius. >> jimmy: okay, thank you very much. [ applause ] >> he's on a roll. >> jimmy: hi, what's your name? >> my name is dean. >> jimmy: dean, your resolution is to stop crying during "the good wife." hello, folks. it's wednesday night. welcome to "the knife guys." [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: how you doing? will farrell, everybody. hey, will. >> hey, jimmy. >> jimmy: how's it going? >> what's up? >> jimmy: nothing. just doing the show. wa what's up with you? >> now? >> jimmy: yeah. abc moved us up to 11:35, so we're on earlier now. >> ha ha. yeah, right. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: no really, they did.
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what's going on here? >> well, i use the studio at 11:30 on wednesdays for my qvc knife show. you might want to check the sign-in sheet. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i didn't even realize there was a sign-in sheet, to be honest with you. >> well, there is and my name is on it. >> jimmy: oh. well, i'm very sorry. i didn't know. >> it's okay. i'll just go ahead and start. >> jimmy: you know what, i'm in the middle of my show right now. >> i have knives to sell, kimmel, okay? >> jimmy: all right. do it quick, okay? >> knifers, only a few of these beauties left. say hello to the nonstick razor steel samurai stab master 2200. you want primo slicing action, look at what this baby does to balloons, huh? [ cheers and applause ] you always have trouble cutting
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through flan, don't you, jimmy? >> jimmy: yeah. >> not a problem. this thing literally cuts through warm butter like it's warm butter. >> jimmy: that's great. that's fantastic. thank you, will. you're done? >> oh, not even close. let's bring out my guest who has some more stuff to slice. ryan? [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: ryan. that's my job. how you doing, ryan? >> what the hell are you doing here, jimmy? >> jimmy: what are you doing here? >> we sell knives at 11:30. >> jimmy: i didn't know. i've never seen the sheet. >> we've been here for three months. >> jimmy: i didn't know. i'm sorry, i don't know how this is my fault. >> it doesn't matter, ryan. let's get to chopping, huh?
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cookie doe! cotton candy! chocolate milk! you always got to slice chocolate milk. potato chips, gone! >> how many of these -- >> tapioca pudding! >> do you have? >> jimmy: i think we should probably wrap it up. will? >> apple sauce! >> jimmy: if you could wrap it up. i don't feel like you're actually selling anything. >> oh! oh! >> jimmy: are you all right? >> what is your problem, jimmy? >> jimmy: it's not my fault! i didn't do this? >> your energy did this. [ laughter ] >> it's deep. it's deep. >> that is a beautiful cut, though. >> a beautiful cut. >> yeah. >> it's a cleaner slice. a much cleaner slice than you'd get from my store bought knife. right to the bone.
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>> it's beautiful. >> jimmy: you know, maybe you should go see the medic or something? huh? >> i think we're gonna go. we're gonna go now. >> jimmy: ryan, he's getting a little woozy, i think. >> this is your fault, jimmy. >> jimmy: this is not my fault! this is not my fault. [ cheers and applause ] all right, this seems like a good time to take a break. when we come back, and we will be right back, we'll find out how much people know about the congress they hate so much. spoiler alert, it's not a lot. that, plus brad paisley and ryan gosling, too. stick around. ♪
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>> jimmy: welcome back. ryan gosling and brad paisley are on the show tonight. the whole room is covered with pudding right now. how many of you got flu shots here? [ applause ] all right. everyone who got one can stay. the rest of you are getting thrown out right now. this is a big week for me. it's flu season right now and they say it's a particularly bad one. there's a new facebook app called "help, my friend gave me the flu." it goes through your facebook friends to try to figure out who gave you the flu. it combs through all of your facebook friends' pages and looks for any mention of sneezing, coughing or vomiting and implicates them as potential patient zero. let me save you some trouble. facebook isn't going to tell you who gave you the flu, because they gave it to you. you spend hours and hours hunched over that filthy keyboard looking at status updates the find out what's
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going on with people you would never call to find out what's going on. remember when you used to go outside to get fresh air? remember when you used to sleep? now you sit in bed with your laptop stalking your college boyfriend's girlfriend's vacation photos. looking at your co-worker's triathlon photos is not exercise. facebook, i believe, is trying to distract you from the fact that it gave you the flu. you're welcome. there should be a facebook app that tracks down whoever told you to join facebook and then pokes them to death. it is a bad flu season, though. the flu is having a worse season than the lakers. here's how things are going for the lakers this year. this happened at the lakers-rockets game in houston last night. lakers point guard steve nash is towelling off during a break in the third quarter. he hands the towel to his teammate metta world peace. i guess when you shower together, stuff like that doesn't faze you. here's some bad news for congress. congress's approval rating is 9%
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right now. a new poll from public policy polling showed that congress is currently less popular than root canals, colonoscopies, traffic jams, cockroach, brussels sprouts, the band nickel back, and lice. nickel back must be thrilled to be in there with lice. this is my favorite question. this is a real question they asked. what do you have a higher opinion of, congress or gonorrhea? 53% said congress, 18% said undecided. so there you go. you're almost twice as popular as an std, congress. now, congress is doing a bad job, there's no doubt about that. but it got me thinking, how much do people really know about what they're complaining about? we sent a camera on to hollywood boulevard today to ask people what i think are two very good questions. >> what is your name and where are you from? >> mike, i'm from rome, georgia. >> how do you think congress is doing? >> horrible. >> and who are your congressmen?
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>> i've got them written down, i know that. >> how do you think congress is doing? >> [ bleep ]. >> and who are you congressmen? >> i don't know. >> who are your congressmen? >> um, well, i know susan -- what is susan's last name? >> who is your congressman? >> some girl. >> how do you think congress is doing? >> awful. >> who are your congressmen? >> uh -- honestly, i don't know. i didn't vote for them. >> can you name two people from the "jersey shore"? >> j-woww and snooki. [ laughter ] >> how do you think congress is doing? >> not too happy with them right now. >> and who are your congressmen? >> i don't know. >> do you know who kim kardashian is dating? >> i do, actually. >> who? >> kanye west. >> and do you know who taylor
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swift just broke up with? >> yeah, the guy from one direction. >> do you know who your congressmen are? >> nope. >> can you name the little girl who's a beauty pageant queen who has her on tv show? >> oh, honey boo boo? a train wreck. >> how do you think congress is doing? >> i think they're a bunch of dunder heads, but hey, we made the bed and we're sleeping in it. >> who are your congressmen? >> it's henry waxman. and senators feinstein and boxer. >> and can you name two people from the "jersey shore"? >> no, i cannot. oh, there's snoogi or what's her name. that's all i know. sorry about that. >> jimmy: oh, well what a dummy. well-done. we have a good show for you tonight. brad paisley is here. and guess what, we'll be right back with ryan gosling. so stick around. ♪
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>> jimmy: tonight on the show, a very talented grammy winning country star to sing from the bud light stage. brad paisley is here with us. and tomorrow night, dr. oz will be here. dr. oz is going to do a sonogram on me to see if i'm pregnant. we'll also be joined by blake griffin and chris paul of the l.a. clippers and we'll have bruno mars. we did a little research. identical twins do not have the same fingerprints.
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we have two here in the audience who apparently share a brain. [ laughter ] you'd think they would know this. our first guest is an oscar and golden globe-nominated actor who casts a powerful spell on women and talk show hosts alike. you can see him alongside josh brolin and sean penn in the new movie "gangster squad" which opens in theaters on friday. please say hello to ryan gosling. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: how you doing? [ cheers and applause ] it happens all the time, i'm sure. how are you?
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even some of the guys are hooting and howling. it's getting crazy in here. how's it going? everything all right? >> yeah, that was bogus. >> jimmy: what was? you're still on the knife show thing? >> you're better than that, jimmy. >> jimmy: thank you. i think you're wrong. >> you were confused about the whole time slot thing. what happened to 12:00? you didn't avoid being off at 12:00. >> jimmy: we will just be in progress. everything all right? >> yeah, everything's good. i haven't seen you since that amazing dinner. >> jimmy: that's right. we had dinner with don rickles. the great don rickles. you were a big fan of don rickles. >> i mean, i'm such a huge fan of don. i think in general, you should never meet your heroes. but this was a case where that was -- you know what i'm saying. >> jimmy: he lived up to it. >> yes. >> jimmy: don, even if he's not
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nice to you, it's great. >> it's the best. i was so nervous, i walked up to him. i said don, i'm ryan. and he went, what do you want me to do, get up and shoot a rocket out of my pants? [ laughter ] [ applause ] >> jimmy: and did you ask him if he would do that? that was a fun night. who else was there? don's manager tony was there. >> can we talk about tony? >> jimmy: yes, tony is great. >> that was incredible, because there was a gentleman at the end of the table. he just looked like the most interesting person i had ever met. he had a look in his eyes. it was not dissimilar from guillermo right now. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: guillermo just woke up when you said his name. >> he was just watching like this from the end of the table. i thought i have to go talk to him. and i found out he was frank sinatra's right-hand man for -- >> jimmy: yeah, he was for a long time. >> i said to him, what was frank like? and he said, what was frank
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like? he said, one time i'm in the bar, frank comes in, gets two handfuls of goldfish crackers, runs outside. i go outside, frank's lying in the grass, he's crumpling up the crackers on an ant hill. i said frank, what are you doing? he says, the ants got to eat, too, tony. [ laughter ] [ applause ] he said everybody ate when frank was around, even the ants! [ laughter ] >> jimmy: they need the energy for all those rubber tree plants they're pushing around, probably what it was. that was a fun night. you picked up the check, which was totally unnecessary. >> what? you told everybody i was going to do that. >> jimmy: i heard a story about you, and i haven't asked you about this, but i want to know if it's true or not. about five or six years ago, a friend of mine, daniel and his wife diane -- diane works here, in fact -- said they were about to get on the ten, on the freeway in santa monica, and you pulled up next to them, or
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somebody who looked like you pulled up next to them and handed them several boxes of girl scout cookies, and then drove off. and as you drove off, daniel said i think that was ryan gosling. and his wife said yeah, i think that was ryan gosling. so was that ryan gosling? [ laughter ] >> seemed like a good idea at the time. >> jimmy: it wasn't you? oh, it was you? >> yeah. look, i regret it. i do. >> jimmy: why would you regret that? >> because, it was just -- okay, when i was a kid, my dad -- he had side businesses all the time. and somehow, i don't know how, but he came upon, like, a truckload of cellophane. >> jimmy: okay. what? >> suddenly, there was all this cellophane in our basement. >> jimmy: okay. >> and he wanted me to sell it. >> jimmy: he wanted you to sell cellophane? >> it's like plastic wrap. you wrap sandwiches in it. >> jimmy: saran wrap?
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>> yeah. i'm trying to sell it to the kids at school. trying to sell it to my teachers. and then when i couldn't get rid of it, i thought i'll go outside at the supermarket and wait until people with their food -- because they're going to need to wrap it. [ laughter ] anyway, i had a fantasy that one day someone would buy all of it, you know? and some guy would be like i'll take it all. which never happened. >> jimmy: uh-huh. >> so i was walking out of ralph's one day and i saw these kids trying to sell their cookies and i was like i'll take them all. i bought hundreds and hundreds of boxes. i didn't realize how many boxes i was going to have. i had a car full of them. i didn't know what to do. so i started throwing them out the window to people on the street. [ laughter ] [ applause ] don't celebrate that. >> jimmy: what's wrong with that? >> at the time, i thought this must be what santa claus feels like. i pull up to people, they're at the stoplight. and i just throw cookies.
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and then i looked at this one person who was looking at me. i realized through their eyes, i was not santa claus. i was just a creepy cookie guy. who is this guy? why does he have all those? what happened to the girl scouts? why does he have all their cookies? i regret it. >> jimmy: do you still have any cookies left? >> i still have a bunch. >> jimmy: you do. pass some around at the end. we take a break here. ryan gosling is with us. we'll be right back. [ ryon ] eating shrimp at red lobster is a fantastic experience. 30 shrimp for $11.99. i can't imagine anything better. you're getting a ton of shrimp, and it tastes really good! [ male announcer ] hurry in to red lobster's 30 shrimp for just $11.99! choose any two of five savory shrimp selections, like mango jalapeño shrimp and parmesan crunch shrimp. two delicious shrimp selections on one plate! all with salad and unlimited cheddar bay biscuits. 30 shrimp, just $11.99 for a limited time. wow, that's a lot of shrimp. i'm ryon stewart, i'm the ultimate shrimp lover, and i sea food differently.
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[ all kids ] faster! ok, what's fast? um, my mom's car and a cheetah. okay. a spaceship. a spaceship. and what's slow? my grandma's slow. would you like it better if she was fast? i bet she would like it if she was fast. hm, maybe give her some turbo boosters. tape a cheetah to her back. tape a cheetah to her back? seems like you have thought about this before. [ male announcer ] it's not complicated. faster is better. and the iphone 5 downloads fastest on at&t 4g. ♪ a little more. there's a real, like, camaraderie in the parking lot... shut up! that's it! let's go in the car. my time to shine is the smoked pulled pork. i think it's done broseph! pretty much got it down to a science... pretty much. we also really like a great pulled pork sandwich even when we can't make the game. you ruined it! some people even like it better. really? yep. [ male announcer ] new carving board pulled pork, get that delicious slow smoked taste without the hassle. it's game time food.
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i got shot down once over the pacific.
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i spent the night hanging on to the wing of the plane and i had sharks bumping my legs in the dark. are you weak in the knees yet? >> sure, i am. you're not quite big enough. i give up. what's your racket, handsome? >> my racket is i'm a bible salesman. >> you want to take me away from all this and make an honest woman out of me? >> no, ma'am. i was just hoping to take you to bed. >> jimmy: very smooth. that is ryan gosling and emma stone in "gangster squad." what are you gonna do? women find you irresistible. this movie, i don't know if you're aware of this, but the guy who directed this movie used to work here as a director on our show. >> get out of here. >> jimmy: he never talks about this, does he? he's trying to erase this from his history. >> what happened to your hair?
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>> jimmy: i got a haircut last night. >> who did that to you? >> jimmy: jennifer aniston cut my hair last night. >> why did you let her do that? >> jimmy: i don't know. but i got a lot of repair work. >> she seems like a very hostile person. >> jimmy: she didn't do it on purpose. it just happened. but let's get back to your film. it's very old timeeme y. was it fun playing this character? >> it was a little stressful. >> jimmy: in what way? >> it's based on a real person. it's tricky because he's a real man, and trying to balance -- because there's a lot of fictionalized events. so trying to turn a real person into fictionalized events and do it respectfully to him and also to the film was a little strange. >> jimmy: you have such a hard life. i can see how that would be very difficult for you. you brought something along with you, and i'd like you to explain
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what this is. because i think this is pretty great. >> okay. so when -- i don't know why this is. but when i saw the posters for "gangster squad," i just kept hearing r. kelly songs in my head, and i kept thinking r. kelly, i was hearing r. kelly songs and i couldn't understand why. so i called my friend kay, who is an expert in all things r. kelly. i asked him why. he sent me this. >> jimmy: this is the poster for "gangster squad" in the middle. that's the r. kelly "trapped in the closet" poster. and there really is -- it's a remarkable resemblance between them. >> it's a little strange. we should talk to ruben about that. and talk about why he's pretending he doesn't know who i am. >> what did you do to him? >> jimmy: i didn't do anything bad to him. it's great to see you. thank you for coming. it's great to have you here. ryan gosling. his movie is called "gangster
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>> dicky: the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series, sponsored by bud light. to stream off-air performances and other music videos go to jimmykimmellive.com. sorry. sore knee.
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starting at just $9.99. see you tomorrow. >> jimmy: our next guest is a
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hugely successful musician. he has three grammys, two amas, 14 acm and another 14 cma awards. and he keeps them all underneath one very large hat. his upcoming album doesn't have a title yet but his new song does -- it's called "southern comfort zone." please welcome brad paisley. [ cheers and applause ] it's like new year's here. you doing all right? >> is something on my -- >> jimmy: you got some promotional merchandise on your head there. thank you for coming. have you finished your album? >> we got about a month left of recording. >> jimmy: you're recording at your house. >> we are. this is the first time i've sole produced it.
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the first time we've ever done a record with no one there that knows how to do one. and i really wanted it to be -- i don't know. special or something. i don't know what it's going to wind up being. >> jimmy: is it harder to do it at your house or easier? seems a little bit lazy. >> it's a little bit -- well, it's a bit like you party, because you're so late -- i'm 3:00 in the morning walking back -- it's in another house on our farm. 3:00 in the morning walking back home. sort of a walk of shame, only you've been actually working. walking by these horses. which are in our field. it just kind of feels like -- it sort of feels wrong and i don't know why. >> jimmy: why would it? >> i guess because your family's up at the house and you're down there working. >> jimmy: are they looking at you weird? >> the horses do. they look at me like what is he doing out here? >> jimmy: you do not have the title for the album. >> i do, but i was thinking about announcing it tonight. >> jimmy: that would be great. [ applause ]
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before you commit, before you're locked into anything, i have an idea that i would like you to consider, and you take as much time as you like to think about it. i think you should call the new album "thriller." >> that's a great idea. >> jimmy: i mean, right away, it's like a huge multi-platinum seller right off the bat. "thriller 2" would be good, too. >> and if you're lucky, they'll mess up all the royalty checks. >> jimmy: and start sending them to you. >> i was thinking about "red." anybody name their album "red" lately? >> jimmy: you have to start dating a lot if you're going to do that. >> i'm thinking about calling it "wheelhouse." >> jimmy: "wheelhouse." why "wheelhouse"? >> it's all about leaving your comfort zone. i feel like being able to -- it's like what is my wheelhouse? the baseball expression, sort of. what's in your strength zone, your wheelhouse, where you're comfortable. and we really have tried to go out on a limb with this record
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and sort of see how far we can stretch certain things. >> jimmy: and yet you didn't even leave your house to make it. the video is fantastic. >> thank you. >> jimmy: i don't know if you guys have seen this music video, but you're going from -- you went to like eight different countries or something for it? >> we did. we actually had a european tour right when we were going to do the video, and the point of the song is your love for the south just grows the more that you travel the world, but it's sort of important to see the world. >> jimmy: and you're going from city to city and it's continuous, so you're just walking through, and you're in amsterdam. >> yeah, it's crazy. paris. dublin. and one day, we woke up in norway, flew to paris, shot all day, went running through the streets, running through paris in a cowboy hat, everybody thought i had lost a horse. [ laughter ] that poor cowboy doesn't have a ride. and then we flew to dublin that night and shot a pub scene. so it was three countries in one day. >> jimmy: where did the giraffe come from?
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>> those come from africa, jimmy. >> jimmy: okay. [ laughter ] >> they don't grow those here. >> jimmy: they're not on the ranch? >> we don't have any yet. but boy, it would have followed me home. >> jimmy: yeah, it was a very friendly giraffe. >> we actually shot that at the nashville zoo. his name is congo and he is a big dog. >> jimmy: you brought some extra cuts -- some stuff you cut here, bloopers or whatever you want to call them. this is congo? >> this is really smart. >> jimmy: wow. oh! [ laughter ] what do you feed a giraffe? what was it you were feeding congo? >> beef jerky. but i don't know if that's right. >> jimmy: was it really? >> no, it's some sort of seed pods that he likes to eat. >> jimmy: you have many projects. you're getting involved in television. >> yes. this is really exciting. >> jimmy: for a popular cable show, you've written the theme song. >> i have. we've done the new theme song --
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>> jimmy: should we go ahead and premiere it here? >> yeah. they'll know what it is. >> jimmy: the world premiere of brad paisley's new tv theme song. >>. ♪ in the hills of georgia had a modest home lived a sugared up beauty queen here comes honey boo boo she'll sing a song whistle a tune make ketchup sgetti with her momma june she's roaming the country she's on the loose filled with balls of cheese and go-go juice here comes honey boo boo she's fighting for justice and the american way from the mountain tops she's screams -- >> everybody's a little gay. ♪ an american hero down to the core she eats her meals right off the floor here comes honey boo boo this is the ballad of honey boo
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boo ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: beautifully done. brad paisley, everyone. his album is called "wheelhouse." we'll be right back with music from brad.
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>> dicky: the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series sponsored by bud light. >> jimmy: his new album "wheelhouse" comes out april 9th. here with his song, "southern comfort zone," with some help from the st. james gospel choir, brad paisley. [ cheers and applause ] ♪
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♪ when your wheelhouse is the land of cotton the first time you leave it can be strange ♪ ♪ it can be shocking not everybody drives a truck not everybody drinks sweet tea ♪ ♪ not everybody owns a gun wears a ball cap boots and jeans not everybody ♪ ♪ goes to church or watches every nascar race not everybody knows the words to ring of fire ♪ ♪ or amazing grace oh dixie land
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i hope you understand when i miss ♪ ♪ my tennessee home and i've been away way too long i can't see this world ♪ ♪ unless i go outside my southern comfort zone ♪ ♪ i have walked the streets of rome i have been to foreign lands i know what ♪ ♪ it's like to talk and have nobody understand i have seen the eiffel tower lit up on a paris night ♪ ♪ i have kissed a california girl underneath the northern light s
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♪ i know what it's like to be the only one like me to take a good hard look around ♪ ♪ and be a minority and i miss my tennessee home and i've been away way too long ♪ i can't see this world unless i go outside my southern comfort zone ♪ ♪ i miss your biscuits and your gravy fireflies dancing in the night ♪ ♪ you have fed me and saved me billy graham and martha white i have since ♪ ♪ become a drifter and i just can't wait to pack 'cause i know the route i leave on ♪ ♪ it will always bring me back
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♪ i miss my tennessee home i've been away way too long i can't see this world ♪ ♪ unless i go outside my southern comfort zone look away ♪ ♪ look away i wish i was in dixie away ♪

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