>> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- sharon stone. dane cook. the bachelorette. and music from jamie n commons. with cleto and the cletones. and now, just relax, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you. i'm jimmy. i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thank you for being here tonight.

i'm glad you're enthusiastic. [ cheers and applause ] i hope you had a good weekend. i'll tell you something, i was sick all day yesterday. i almost never get sick, but i was yesterday. you know what i do when i get sick? i complain nonstop until i feel better. [ laughter ] and it works. i called the deli near my house and ordered chicken soup and the guy showed up to deliver it and i realize, this is a terrible job because healthy people don't have chicken soup delivered to their house. you know, pizza everyone's happy with. this guy when he gets an order for chicken soup he probably rings the bell, he probably holds his breath the whole time he's there. [ laughter ] i gave him the money and then, you know, usually i kiss the delivery guy good-bye to be polite. he wanted none of it. [ laughter ] i guess some people are just germophobic is what it is. speaking of phobias it's shark week on the discovery channel right now. the 26th annual shark week. [ cheers and applause ] somehow it still hasn't jumped itself. for some reason we're obsessed with the idea of being attacked by sharks.

did you know more people are killed by moose every year than sharks? that's true. more than a billion people are killed by moose every year. [ laughter ] but we don't have moose week. maybe we should, though. this video is starting to get very popular online. and it could be the centerpiece of the whole thing. it's a moose on the loose in maine. >> i'm behind the moose. he's running down 95 right now. he's just running. look at this. >> we're looking at it. >> i'm behind the moose, and he is running down 95 right now p he is right here in front of me. >> jimmy: wait, where is he? >> he's running down 95! it's a moose! holy crap. what is he doing? he's right next to my car. where's he going? >> jimmy: we don't know. >> come on, moosey. oh, my gosh. this is insane.

this is crazy! [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah. it is a little crazy. >> where are you going? where are you going, moosey? moosey, come here. [ laughing ] >> jimmy: you know, that's why you have to keep your eyes on the road. [ applause ] we may have added that. that's how the geico moose was born. some big news for our national pastime today. major league baseball announced suspensions for 13 players for alleged use of performance-enhancing drugs, most notably baseball's highest paid player, alex rodriguez of the new york yankees. 12 players got 50-game suspensions. a-rod is suspended for 211 games. which is an odd number, but 211 is what they calculated his batting average would have been without the drug. [ laughter ] so it seemed like -- he held a press conference earlier in chicago tonight. some press conference. he dodged almost every question.

but when asked directly did you use performance-enhancing drugs he said, "me no steroids" and then knocked white sox stadium down with his bare hands. [ laughter ] i don't believe a-rod used performance-enhancing drugs, but i also don't believe in canadians. [ laughter ] really? there are millions of people living in another country above us? i don't think so. [ laughter ] kobe bryant was in china this weekend. the nba is very popular in china, which makes sense because that's where all the shoes come from. [ laughter ] but kobe's popularity over there has apparently reached justin bieber levels of crazy. >> kobe bryant! >> kobe, on the second stop of his annual summer trip to china. about 25,000 screaming fans climbing trees and jamming the streets outside a sporting goods store.

>> jimmy: well, cymbalta can help with that. [ laughter ] wait until he finds out about the "bachelorette" finale tonight. tonight we join together as a nation to witness the season finale of "the bachelorette" here on abc. tonight bachelorette desiree selects the man she will spend the next week on the cover of "us weekly" with. [ laughter ] it was a two-part season finale. that's how big this was. going into part one last week, desiree's three remaining suitors were brooks, chris, and drew. brooks left the show voluntarily, and desiree was devastated when he went. but then she eliminated drew. and when chris, the remaining guy, proposed to her, she said yes. here it was, the moment of truth. >> i want to be your first and i want to be your last. will you marry me?

>> yes. >> shark week. sunday! >> jimmy: this shark week is getting out of control. it is weird, though, that one day desiree's crying hysterically because brooks backed out and then two days later she's getting married to chris. it's almost like this is some kind of manufactured tv love. [ laughter ] what is chris going to say when he watches the show and sees how upset she was about brooks? he'll always know he was the runner-up. but love is love, i guess. and to celebrate desiree and chris's unique relationship, we put together some highlights of their consolation engagement tonight. ♪ and i ♪ will settle for you ♪ i ♪ will settle for you

♪ i gave you my rose ♪ but you're not the one who i chose ♪ ♪ i see your face ♪ you were always second place ♪ and i will settle for you ♪ i will settle for you ♪ you're my number two [ applause ]

>> jimmy: very emotional. maybe it's a hallucinogen. i don't know. you know, they finished shooting "the bachelorette" months ago. they have to do that because they need time to edit it. but there's some new footage, footage that was not seen in the finale tonight, that leads me to believe things are not as rosy as they appear. as a matter of fact, we've obtained exclusive video from an ertd who works on the show that leads me to believe that chris and desiree, not only aren't they engaged, they're not together at all anymore. >> i'm so sorry. >> now i don't know where to start. >> where do we go from here in where do you want to go from here? >> i don't know. i never thought this is -- >> i realized that there's only one person in the world who can make me happy.

and i have to go to him. >> hi. [ laughter ] >> what are you doing here? no one's supposed to know about us. >> i love you. i've always loved you. >> why did you leave me? >> you left me to go onto the "baby bachelor." >> you went on "the bachelorette." >> yes. >> what's going on here? >> oh, no. >> yes. >> who is she? >> i'm desiree. and who are you? >> i'm your worst nightmare, honey. >> jesse, you're not nice to me. and i'm leaving.

>> this is not over yet. >> come on, wesley. let's go. >> our love. >> nine, ten. ready or not, here i come! ♪ ♪ >> he's everything i've ever wanted in a toddler. >> let's get married right now. >> are you sure? aren't you already married to jesse? >> that's why i have lawyers.

>> when we're together the world seems miles away. >> i cannot wait to marry wesley. >> driver, take us to the courthouse. >> and make it snappy! >> sure thing. >> oh, no! >> ahhhh! [ laughing ] >> jimmy: i don't know if my heart can take it. [ applause ] when we come back -- wait a minute. it says we have a special appearance from matt damon. well, that can't be right. i don't know. apparently, we have a special appearance from matt damon when we come back. plus sharon stone, dane cook, and music from jamie n commons. so hurry up. [ cheers and applause ] [ male announcer ] this is the age of knowing what you're made of. why let erectile dysfunction get in your way? talk to your doctor about viagra.

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>> jimmy: welcome back. tonight on the show, dane cook and music from jamie n commons. coming up. but before that one of the big movies many of the summer is coming out on friday, called "elysium" direct bid the director of "district 9." and starring matt damon. i don't know why he's the star of the movie. can't act. [ laughter ] i don't know anyone who likes him. but i think his dad owns the movie studio or something. so he forces them to put him in all nimz. so he did another one. and guillermo bumped into him in miami last week. right? >> right, jimmy. >> jimmy: and it was uncomfortable, right? >> very uncomfortable. >> jimmy: well, we happened to have sent cameras along. let's take a look to see how that went. >> matt damon blasts back onto the big screen in this summer's sci-fi epic "elysium." our cameras caught up with matt to find out what attracted him

to the project. >> well, it was really a chance to work with the director, neil blomkamp. he also did "district 9" which came out a few years ago which is a great movie. >> i want two cameras. one over here. one over -- make sure you get my right side. my left side. >> got, it guillermo. >> can i get some water, please? >> okay. we're set. >> what are you doing here, man? >> what i'm doing here. what are you doing here? >> what am i doing here? i'm promoting my movie, "elysium." look, man, i'm trying to do my job here. i have an interview i have to do, okay? >> with who? i have to do the junket for my movie. >> you're going to do a junkie for your movie? >> yes. >> you have a movie? >> yeah. i have a movie. you think you're the only actor who does movies? >> you have a movie called "estupido" and then an arrow pointed toward me? >> yes. >> okay. what's "estupido" about? >> it's about a man.

who's stupid. who's from boston. it's based on a true story. >> look, i don't have time to do this stuff, okay? just please, can you just move out of the shot and let me finish? i'm sorry. we have a thing. anyway. so all the rich people in the world have kind of moved off into this space station and are living off -- >> [ speaking spanish ]. >> no, you don't. >> yeah, i -- why am i even talking -- take your thing. just -- don't hurt the "elysium" poster. just get out -- [ laughter ] >> so you made two movies this year? >> yes. i made two movies. i've been real busy.

>> your second movie is called "ass face" with an arrow pointed right at me. >> yes, matt. >> you didn't make any movies, did you, guillermo? >> no, mr. matt damon. i don't have any movies. >> jimmy paid thousands and thousands of dollars to fly you from l.a. to miami to carry a sign that says "ass face" with ab arrow pointed tarred me, double-booking a hotel room so you can do this? >> jimmy's very rich. he can do whatever he wants. [ laughter ] >> you think it's funny? >> yeah, i think it's funny. >> you know, i pity you. i pity you. i pity him. there's huge problems in the world and this is what you guys want to spend your time doing? this is -- you know what? can you just zoom it -- can you get a shot, just zoom in please close on my face? can you -- i have something i'd like to say to jimmy. all right? once and for all, and i hope you're listening very carefully because this is important and

you need to hear it. okay? you -- >> coming this summer, a real stupid actor in the role of a lifetime. mr. matt damon is "ass face." from the makers of "we bought a zoo." [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: see, that i would see. thank you, guillermo. very well done, as usual. guillermo, everyone. my agent of doom. tonight on the show dane cook is here. we have music from jamie n commons. and we'll be right back with sharon stone! [ cheers and applause ] [ male announcer ] it's a golden opportunity to discover a hybrid from the luxury car company

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>> jimmy: tonight on the program, a very funny man who starting this friday you can hear in the new animated disney film "planes," our old pal dane cook is here with us tonight. [ cheers and applause ] and then, with music from this ep, this is called "rumble and sway," jamie n commons from the sony stage. you can also see jamie august 14th at the troubadour here in los angeles. tomorrow night julia louis-dreyfus will be here, nick offerman will be with us, and we'll have music from michael keewanooka. and later this week, harrison ford, jason sudeikis, keri russell, amber heard, and music from mayer hawthorne and joan

jett and the blackhearts too. so join us then. our first guest is an oscar-nominated and golden globe-winning actor, starting friday, you can see her as adult film star linda lovelace's mother in the new movie "lovelace." please say hello to sharon stone. [ cheers and applause ] very nice to meet you. >> it's very nice to meet you. >> jimmy: you look fantastic. how's your summer going? >> you too. you're so fit. >> not really. once i take my truss off, once the spanx come off, this is a real mess. i look like a teletubby. >> you're looking pretty lean and mean. >> jimmy: thank you very much. how are you doing? everything all right? >> i'm good. i hear we were both in italy. >> jimmy: i was in italy for my honeymoon, yes. you were traveling in italy? >> i was not in italy for my honeymoon. >> jimmy: you were not? you there there for my

honeymoon. how nice. [ laughter ] >> exactly. we went on his honeymoon together. >> jimmy: that would be a hell of a surprise. honey. >> look who i brought. >> jimmy: look who's staying with us. yeah, no, if we could work that out, that would be great. [ laughter ] >> funnily, this is not the first time i've had that offer. >> jimmy: is that right? >> yeah. >> jimmy: and i'm sure it won't be the last either. >> hopefully. >> jimmy: what were you up to in italy? where did you go? >> we went to a town called azalo. i have friends who live in the italian countryside, and i took my kids. we spent much of the summer there. they came back, and i made a movie in rome. >> jimmy: wow. that's great. that's got to be a lot -- is it fun or does it sound more fun than it is? >> well, you know, both. >> jimmy: i got you. >> it's fun and it's kooky. because you know. you're italian, right? >> jimmy: yeah, yeah. my mother is. >> so you know. >> jimmy: yeah. it's -- >> it's enthusiastic. >> jimmy: there's a lot of enthusiasm. >> there's a lot of enthusiasm and a lot of chaos. >> jimmy: yes. for sure. especially in rome. >> yeah. >> jimmy: and in rome, i mean,

are people like constantly grabbing you and whistling at you and humping your leg and whatnot? [ laughter ] >> jimmy, just because that happened to you. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: oh, don't i wish. >> everything but the leg humping. i didn't get that. >> jimmy: do you speak italian? >> poco. about love and food. but really that's all they talk about anyway. >> jimmy: almost everyone seems to speak english over there. so then you feel dumb trying to speak italian. >> i tried. >> jimmy: and making them suffer through the italian. >> you know, i was there for six weeks. so after six weeks you kind of get it a little bit. or at least i thought i did. >> jimmy: you did, yeah. and they probably -- >> they're nodding and smiling and i'm talking. >> jimmy: yeah, i would think they'll play along and act -- with me i'll probably get thrown out of the place. >> they give you food and you just keep going. >> jimmy: i heard you met the queen. >> not in italy, but i did. i was going on this trip where i was going to go to israel for a week and then with my oldest son and then the kids were coming to

italy and we were going to do this whole thing. and then the last moment i got a call that i was invited to the windsor polo match to sit in the queen's box. so of course i instantly changed my plans and said to my son let's go, we can meet the queen. i'd never met the queen. i thought this is the greatest thing that can happen. p we went. i nearly wounded myself practicing the curtsies. you have to get that right. and they tell you you have to say your majesty and after the first time you say ma'am. and you know like -- we practiced curtsying and bowing and the -- >> jimmy: your son was curtsying as well? >> well, my son, because he has to bow and and we're doing the thing. but of course it was the first day. so when it came time to meet the queen he was dead asleep in his chair from jet lag. >> jimmy: oh, really? how old is he? >> 13. >> jimmy: oh. wow. you know what? if you can't wake up for the queen -- >> that's it. he missed the whole thing. and i was so tongue-tied. because you know, when you say

the queen, no one says which queen. like was it the queen of finland? was it the queen -- >> jimmy: latifah. [ laughter ] no? different queen? >> yeah. i remember telling queen. latifah. no one's going to ask you, you know, if you're a rapper because half of the world doesn't know about this at this time. just pretend you're queen of an african nation. >> jimmy: yeah. why not? i think she did go along with that. so you meet the queen, and do you get to talk to her? >> i was so tongue-tied. once i finally managed to check out "your majesty" -- >> jimmy: you choked out "yoyou majesty? [ laughter ] >> and realized that i was actually looking at the queen. who's so pretty. >> jimmy: is she? >> oh. [ laughter ] yes, she is. >> jimmy: all right. i mean boy, is she. [ laughter ]

>> that's right. and she's so -- and she's so -- she's so lovely. come on. and it was her coronation. so she had on all fuchsia. the fuchsia hat, the coat, the thing, the broach, the -- everything. and i was just like -- i was so overwhelmed. so i did the "your majesty," and then she just kept looking and i was like, i know that i can speak. but it seems to have failed me now. as i'm just staring at her. >> jimmy: did you have something prepared that you were planning to say to her? >> i can't remember. i just stood there like a complete dumb-ass. it was like -- >> jimmy: did she say anything to you? >> she kept looking at me like who is this dumb woman? >> jimmy: and then your son's asleep in the corner. >> and my son is sleeping somewhere else. >> jimmy: his family took too much ambien.

[ laughter ] so that did not go well, then? >> it went okay. it went okay. >> jimmy: did the queen -- did she know your work? had she seen "total recall" or anything like that? >> i'm sure she'd seen "basic instinct." all of the royalty. [ laughter ] she said "miss stone, now that you've curtsied, please show me the leg crossing." [ laughter ] >> jimmy: wow. this is some queen. >> "i'm so intrigued by that." >> jimmy: sharon stone is here. her movie is called lovelace. it opens in theaters friday. we'll be right back.

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i was really hoping that i could move back in here for a while. >> yeah? >> yeah. >> no. you know that's not possible. >> why not? >> how would it look for a married woman to move in with her parents apart from her husband? >> he hits me, ma. >> well, i can't say i'm surprised. what did you do? >> what do you mean what did i do? >> what did you do to make him angry? >> jimmy: that is sharon stone in "lovelace."

it opens on friday. well, for those who don't know, the movie "deep throat" was a huge cultural phenomenon. and this was a little before most people's time. but -- and you play linda lovelace, who is the star of the film's mom, who's not a great mother. slaps her across the face in the film. and how do you prepare another actress for the slapping? do you practice on her? is there -- >> i could slap you and show you. >> jimmy: well, show me. like what would you say before a slap. i think you slapped me once already tonight, by the way. [ laughter ] if dane hits me, i'm going to be deaf. >> no, it's a scene that was written in the movie. so everyone was prepared that it is what it is. >> jimmy: i see. >> it's pretty much like when joe pesci threw me down the stairs in "casino." you just kind of get at the top of the stairs and suck it up. >> jimmy: and you just go. >> yeah. >> jimmy: is that what you told amanda, i've been thrown down the stairs? >> you're just getting a little

tap on the face, honey. let's go. >> jimmy: were you aware of "deep throat" and what -- i guess still to this day the highest-grossing -- >> it was a little before my time. i grew up in a very rural community in pennsylvania. so it wasn't a big porno environment. >> jimmy: right. it wasn't? >> not so much. >> jimmy: they are now, i think. [ laughter ] >> not so much. >> jimmy: you didn't go through your parents' stuff and find something in a box? >> my parents weren't really the porno type. >> jimmy: oh, they weren't? those are the ones who are really the porno type. [ laughter ] >> no. my mom is the i wear an apron to the beach type. >> jimmy: i see. so you'd never seen a -- >> no. i've never seen a porno movie. >> jimmy: you still haven't seen a porno miff? >> no. >> jimmy: ever? >> no. >> jimmy: me neither. [ laughter ] [ applause ] >> hey! >> jimmy: wow. >> we're a lot alike. >> jimmy: that's unbelievable. even in the -- like in the hotel flipping through the --

>> when i've been in scandinavian countries, you know, it's on regular tv. >> jimmy: right. >> and you're flipping through. and i remember i was in a hotel, i was so tired, i was working, i was flipping through, and i saw a guy on -- it looked like a pilates table. and he had like chaps with no ass in them. >> jimmy: yes. >> laying on a table. and there was a lady standing next to him in kind of like a leather corset with a whip. and i thought, oh, i don't think so. >> jimmy: your brief brush with porno. well, we should get together and watch porno sometime. [ applause ] it will be a learning experience. the movie is called "lovelace." it's in theaters, itunes, and on demand everywhere starting friday. sharon stone, everyone. we'll be right back with dane cook.

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[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: our next guest tonight is an actor and tremendously successful stand-up comedian, who is now available for children's parties as he lends his voice to the new animated disney film "planes." it opens in theaters friday. please welcome dane cook. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> all right. >> jimmy: it's good to see you. and i want to ask, knowing you and knowing your work, how did you wind up in a -- not just a children's film but a disney animated film? [ laughter ] >> well, i'll tell you, first of all, i'm kind of a method guy. so i would spend many a nights wondering what would a fuselage do? l[ laughter ] that was at proech. >> jimmy: you play a plane. >> i'm a crop duster in the movie.

who has dreams of entering this huge massive race, international race. so i got the call from john lassiter and the people over at disney and they said do you want to come be a voice in this thing? and i was like absolutely, yes. >> jimmy: what could be better than that? you don't have to put on makeup. you don't have to do anything. and then -- >> but i did, jimmy. >> jimmy: you did put on makeup. wow. >> i had a five-hour makeup process. i would have a propeller fashioned to my -- full prosthetic. i had a rudder put on my rear. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you really went for it. you studied -- you rode on planes. you did all sorts of things to prepare for this role. >> well, being a stand-up comedian, jimmy, i live on planes and sometimes on -- >> jimmy: oh, yeah. >> travel. one time, i remember one time -- funny story. [ laughter ] just coming off the top. one time i had my -- i used to travel with my dog beast. i had this little mintin that i used to take everywhere with me. he was always on the road. and i would take a redeye flight and i would sneak him out of the

bag because he was cool-e wouldn't make any noise. and put him under the blafrpth and go to sleep. and one night i wake to a guy shaking me and he's in my face going "your pooch is loose. your pooch is loose!" [ laughter ] which is, by the way, terrifying. it's terrifying to be woken up on a flight. it's more terrifying when somebody's saying a word that nobody uses to describe. we're going to pooch is loose? we're being rerouted to pooch is loose? where is this? so sure enough, my dog was running around the plane. in the middle of the night i have to run around the plane, creeping through a dark plane in the middle of the night going "beast. beast. come." [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that's weird. your pooch was loose. >> and that's how i prepared for the film. >> jimmy: now, you're going on tour next month, right? >> are you guys excited? i'm back on tour next month. [ cheers and applause ] i love it. >> jimmy: and you're doing an unusual thing. you're going to venues that you've never played before.

>> that is true. this is my first time actually doing a theater tour. it's going to start with 20 beautiful houses across these united states. >> jimmy: now, not actual houses. you mean houses of theater. you're not going to people's homes. >> no. but that's a great idea, jimmy. [ laughter ] that's almost going back to how i started, which was -- you know, there was a lot of crazy gigs. >> jimmy: what kind of places did you play back in the day? >> i have a story, actually. >> jimmy: do you? [ laughter ] >> simpatico going on. >> jimmy: that's interesting. there's something about that on this card. >> we call them hell gigs. they're gigs that form you in your early years. i remember place a place called the rathskeller. i was a nobody. it was somewhere in florida, somewhere where you never want to go back to florida, kind of like one of those places where you're like please, get me the heck out of here. i was standing on stage and their stage they built for me was actually a hot dog stand. and i had to -- yeah. it was a hot dog stand. i had to climb a ladder. and i was performing on top of a hot dog stand and people would

be walking under me to get off a hot dog. [ laughter ] so now everybody's sitting there eating hot dogs and i'm trying, to you know, sell them whatever jokes i had on tap. they have video games going on in the back. i get a little bit clocky. i'm like can somebody maybe turn up the video games? because i'm hearing my sound effects while i'm trying to do my performance art. [ laughter ] and somebody had unplugged the video games and suddenly almost like that's a rehearsed it 19 hot dogs just flew -- 19 hot dogs flew at me. and i'll never forget. this is how sad i was at my career at this point. i was back in my motel at this point. and what was i most excited, what was i really, really enthused and thrilled? that no hot dog had hit me. [ laughter ] i'm making it. i dodged every -- i'm going to have a great career. you'll never hit me with your perishables. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: how long after that did you record this album, which is -- there's a tenth anniversary edition. [ cheers and applause ] >> amazing. thank you. ten years ago. and i was on your show -- >> jimmy: oh, ten years ago.

when it came out. >> when my album first came out. >> jimmy: how many copies of this album did you sell? >> millions. i don't even know. yes. unbelievable. i'm so -- thank you. thank you so much. >> jimmy: in the united states. who have not either purchased or illegally downloaded this album? >> i gave it away a lot too. listen, it's an amazing thing to be going out. 23 years doing stand-up. ten years since "harmful." i'm still rocking and rolling. and it's because of you guys. thank you. >> jimmy: still dodging hot dogs? >> it's all because of me as well. i've done a lot. >> jimmy: have you been attacked physically since the hot dog incident? >> no. the only thing that one time i was in a place in the middle of northern maine and i remember i walked in and there was 15 people. i don't even know where i was performing. it's like -- it was a lodge. it was like a lodge of some sort. and i remember looking down at a guy as i was, again, trying to win this crowd over. and he was literally like just -- he was breathing like

this. [ laughter ] and i remember -- and i'm paraphrasing what he said. i finally said sir, this is not working out. and he goes, "we have nothing to do here. and you're interrupting us." [ laughter [ laughter ] that's a terrible thing to say. but that's what gives you the juice, jimmy, to go to the top! [ laughter ] >> jimmy: are you fueled by negative things? because there are some people who go oh, i hate dane cook, i really don't like him. and i've known you for a long time. i've seen you do stand-up. i mean, you are very funny, and you do a ton of material. a lot of people just do a little bit, every year they'll come up with five minutes of stuff. >> right. >> jimmy: but there are people who genuinely hate you. >> i'm celebrating ten years of fandom and ten years of haters as well. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: who was your first hater? do you remember? >> when this came out, i -- people kind of know that i was always online with my fans, you know, direct connection.

i would give people my e-mail and things of that nature. so i remember the first review i got, negative review, this guy wrote me and he said, i hate this comedy album. and he said it's terrible, you're a terrible storyteller, your punchlines are atrocious, and he just -- he just dissected it. and i wrote back to this guy. i e-mailed him back, and i was like -- i don't know my exact words but basically i was like, hey, bub. i think i said bub. [ laughter ] i said, you know, go easy on me. it's my first time here. and so you know, he attacked me and i wrote back just trying to -- so eight years goes by. and i get an e-mail. i'm sitting in my office. i have a special chime when i get an e-mail from a fan. skid' skid' skid'll-e-moo. i open the e-mail. and i realize it's this giep says eight years ago i wrote you an e-mail and i tore apart your act and i told thank you was crap. he said i gave it another listen and i'll tell you, now i think i

understand what people -- what the attraction was and i'm starting to really appreciate how you -- how you, you know, told your stories and really carved out your own path. and i wrote him back in that moment. so like a minute after he sent it i wrote him back, i was just thinking about you, that you really brought up some really good points. [ laughter ] you had some good ideas. thank you. >> jimmy: really? you went full circle where the hater became the haiti and vith. and vice versa. >> we had a meeting of the minds. >> jimmy: congratulations on the disney film. "planes" opens in theaters in 3-d on friday. dane cook. when we come back, music from jamie n commons. [ cheers and applause ]

>> this is dierks bentley at irving plaza in new york city. >> this is luke steele from empire of the sun coming to you from austin, texas. >> catch performances from metric, empire of the sun, and dierks bentley plus great content from these artists and more as part of bud light's music first 50-50-1 music event of the summer.

>> jimmy: this is his ep called "rumble and sway." here with the song "wash me in the water" with some help from the cletones, jamie n commons! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ i'm winning yeah i made it but i've been raising cain cuz the path i'm on ♪

♪ seems much the same ♪ but in the cold night ♪ ♪ well, wash me in the water ♪ wash me in the water ♪ wash me in the water ♪ before i fall ♪ and i've changed lord i've changed the man i used to be i've hurt you far too much ♪ ♪ fore i could see ♪ but in the cold night ♪ i'm sure i'll find a way to

drag you under ♪ ♪ and bring you down again ♪ so wash me in the water ♪ take away this pain wash me in the water wash me in the water wash me of it all ♪ ♪ wash me of it all wash me in the water wash me in the water before my fall ♪ ♪ all these days just pass me by now ending up the same lord all those days ♪ ♪ just passing me by now ♪ just ending up just the same ♪ ending all the same ♪ it's always the same ♪ wash me in the water ♪ wash me ♪ wash me in the water ♪ before my fall ♪ wash me in the water ♪ wash me of it all wash me in the water wash me in the water before my fall ♪