>> dickey: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live." tonight -- james franco and music from snoop dogg, with cleto and the cletones. and now, here's jimmy kimmel! [ applause ] [ cheers and applause ]

this is serious. a little guy named garfield made quite a career out of saying mo mondays are the worst. let's prove him wrong james franco and snoop dogg are here. >> i like snoop dogg. great vibe. >> i heard a rumor you were just in snoop's dressing room. >> yeah, he's a great guy. >> oh no, no, no. is my little piniata all filled with smoke right now? >> a little bit. a little bit. >> wow. i don't know what we're going to do about that. you're more aggressive than you

usually are. oh my gosh. we're going to have to hide the snack table. you know, yesterday was snoop's birthday, which, i bet the funniest part of snoop's birthday is how long it takes him to open all the presents. what do you get the man who won't remember what you got him 20 minutes later? i happen to have a lot of fund memories of snoop dogg. when i was doing "the man show "on comedy century, i went to his house and we shot a rival gang member together. no, we shot a thing at his house, his crib, i believe he called it. they brought a bunch of fried chicken in for lunch. they brought like 30 buckets of fried chicken in. i took a whole bucket for myself and i sat there and really dug into it. snoop was just standing there in amazement watching me eat. i heard him turn to one of his

friends and he said, my nephew done ate six pieces of fried chicken already. it was at that moment that i became snoop's nephew. [ applause ] my uncle will be here in just a little bit. tonight on espn, the worst match up in the 44 year history of monday night football. the 1-4 vikings play the 0-6 giants. they are bad teams but they have great person ale talitpersonali. last night, the colts beat the bron broncos. it was peyton manning's first game back in indianapolis since he left. after the game, michelle asked davis how the colts prepared for peyton manning's offense. and apparently they didn't. >> how did this defense, what did they have in their minds coming in to face this offensive

jaug juggernaut. >> we prepared really hard for tom brady. it just carried over from practice to the game. >> tom brady is on the patriots. they prepared for the wrong guy. next week he is preparing for joe namath. >> in college football, it was a lopsided affair. keep a close eye in particular on the kid dancing without a shirt on. >> you didn't believe that the clemson tigers opening week would be here. who you got? >> i'm believing in number 5, two. the fifth year senior. i think with this crowd, one of the best atmospheres in college football and the defensive line, tackles and defensive ends that clemson had. maybe he makes a mistake but i think that clemson wins the ball

game. >> his parents must be very proud. great things with that masters in biochemical engineering. last week something very unusual emerged from the sea here in southern california. we got a rare glimpse of an oarfish. an 18 foot long oarfish washed up on the beach. it looked like a cross between a sea monster and well, nothing. just a straight up sea monster. they live 3,000 feet deep. they live down where sponge bob lives. there has not been a photograph of an oarfish shot in years. one week later a second oarfish washed up. this one was 14 feet long which is, i guess is good news they are getting smaller. this is the second dead oarfish in a weekend. someone call ll cool jay, there might be an oarfish serial killer on the loose. now it's my life's goal to

barbeque one. that sounds delicious, right guillermo? >> right. yes. >> president obama's new national health care program has been beset by number of problems with the website. there are a lot of reports of error messages and instances of the health care.gov website freezing up. looks like the i.t. guy might be in the i.t. party. this is what happens when we don't outsource to india. things get screwed up. you can wait for them to get the site fixed or you can enroll in medical school, graduate and then just take care of yourself which would probably be faster. i find it fascinating that our national health care website.

president obama addressed these issues in a speech this morning and said there is no excuse. said he's frustrated and then this happened. >> to lift from the american people the crushing burden of unaffordable health care. to free families from the pervasive fear, the one illness -- i got ya. you're okay. this happens when i talk too long. why don't you go. [ applause ] >> there you go. that's obama care. as long as you get sick -- [ applause ] in the presence of the president, you're covered.

the president also reminded that there are other ways to sign up. you don't have to go online. you can enroll over the phone and that's very easy. >> hello and welcome to health care dot gov, the place where you can learn about signing up for affordable health care. your application is very important to us. right now there are 8 million people ahead of you in line. your estimated wait time is forever. >> it would be ironic to die while waiting on hold for health insurance, right? and who wouldn't want to die ironically? facebook had a major outtaj this morning. users around the world experienced a variety of problems. some couldn't log in, some couldn't upload photos. even trying to like a status resulted in problems. i was trying to find actually babies and sunsets to look at. the site went down because they were doing network maintenance

which i guess has to happen from time to time. the next time facebook goes down you might just want to think about this. >> are you unable to post to facebook? not sure where to turn in this time of need? introducing friends. friends are people you with talk to in real life. >> hi, how are you? >> good. >> how are you? >> loving lunch. club sandwich on artisanal bread. >> like. >> look at this picture of me as a baby. >> like. >> i have to show you something. you never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have. hash tag blessed. >> i'm sorry. i can't do this. >> did you just poke me?

what's wrong with you? >> actual friends. call 1-888-so-alone to get yours today. >> available at walgreens. >> not really. you cannot make friends at walgreens. >> when we come back, i have got a 4-year-old kid who knows all the dialogue from the courtroom scene in a few good men. plus james franco and snoop doggy dogg.

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a juicy jumbo beef patty loaded with hickory smoked bacon and melting cheese plus fries and a drink for just $4.99. but this isn't a dream. it's just a video from my last birthday party.

>> welcome back. i could stare at you for hours. >> it's okay? >> yeah. >> you're going to sleep well tonight. you might be sleeping right now. this is -- i want to show you something. this is not for young people. this is footage of disturbing instance of vandalism that happened in the time of windsor, canada. >> the shrubs are for everyone's enjoyment but one is getting a rise out of people more than others. pictures made their way online wednesday. >> it is supposed to be shaped into a caterpillar and someone damaged our work so we had to reshape it. >> monster. absolute monster. so they fixed it and now it looks like this.

could you imagine being the gardener who had to circumsize a bush? in 5,000 years, will we be making penises out of each others hollow pods or whatever we have then? i hope we will. here is another one from the funny crime file. at about 2:00 a.m. on sunday, a 64-year-old man was arrested for operating under the influence after he crashed his car into a rock and a couple of trees. he was on his way home from a halloween party and posed for one of the finest mug shots that i have ever seen. and that is it. the bat mobile did lose its wheel. i love the glasses and the smokey eye shadow. that's good. this is video of a 4-year-old

boy who has an amazing ability to memorize. his dad's favorite movie is "a few good men". >> you don't have to answer the question. >> i'll answer the question. you want answered? >> i think i'm entighted. >> you want answers? >> i want the truth. >> you can't handle the truth. -- i have responsibility that you could possibly fathom. you wish. you have the ability of not knowing what i know. you with your --

[ indiscernible ] >> this whole bathtub is out of order. it goes on for another minute. he also does a few scenes from jangle and chain that i understand made it. have you seen the new tom hanks movie? it's the real story of sea captain. i think it has a 94% rating on rotten tomatoes which is very high. that honor after three weeks still belongs to the movie gravity. to hopefully grab some of the audience tho show up in droves in some of the lighter films.

>> richard was an uptight captain. he always found a reason to worry until a pilot and his gang came along to teach him to unwind. >> relax. everything's going to be okay. >> he was searching for a good time and was hell bent on getting his pal to cut loose. >> there has got to be something other than kidnapping people. >> but no matter how hard he tried to play by the rules his new friend would not give up on his little buddy. >> i can't pick you up. >> and he would fight for his right to party. take the plunge into friendship. pirate party boat, rocking into theaters now. >> with have a new show tonight.

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>> welcome back. >> jimmy: tonight on the program, his new funk album, which he recorded under the name snoopzilla, comes out december 10th. it's called "7 days of funk."

here to chat and with music from the sony outdoor stage, snoop dogg is here. tomorrow night, we will get a visit from former vice president al gore will be here tomorrow night. we better get him a different dressing room, right? from the movie "the inevitable defeat of mister and pete," ethan dizon and skylan brooks -- and we'll have music from michael franti and spearhead. and later this week, sean "diddy" combs, lisa kudrow, malcolm gladwell, and music from keith urban and kings of leon. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: whether he be acting, teaching, painting, writing or just overseeing his family's franco-american spaghetti empire, our first guest lives a fruitful and fascinating life. his first novel is called "actors anonymous." please welcome james franco.

>> you look very handsome. >> thank you. >> i thought your roast was very funny. i'm sure people bring that up a lot. >> it went well. i tell everybody i asked you to be on the roast. i had no idea what the roast entailed. you were going to do it but you were on vacation. you knew what the roast was? >> yeah, i have hosted like three of those things. >> i have never seen one. >> i can't believe you got into that without knowing what it was. which of your many jobs were you doing today? were you teaching, acting? >> i am actually shooting a movie in vancouver right now but i fly back once a week to teach. >> that's unbelievable. do the students -- is it a very popular class?

is it hard to get in? >> i don't have anything to do with admissions. it's a graduate class. >> it's not like, you know -- >> it's not like tons of screaming kids outside. >> it's not like a huge economic class. >> what do they call you? is it formal? >> i'm pretty relaxed. i teach a graduate film class at ucla. i teach a screen writing class at ucla. i do a screen writing class but i hate screen writing classes where you just write screen plays and that's it. a screen play is not the final thing. the final thing is the movie, right? so i have them adapt novel s they bring in a scene and i have actors and we film it in class

and then i have a switcher, i have four cameras going in class and i have a switch room and we cut them all together. >> you do it almost live? >> it's actually super fun. >> that does sound like a lot of fun. >> we might even put it on tv. >> is that right? >> yeah. i have my own show coming up. >> you do? i didn't know this. that's what you need. more work. >> it's like my little artsy stuff. >> i just read you're going to be on broadway? are there many james francos? do you have helpers that work with you? >> no, i'm a robot. >> you really do a lot of things. do you grade the students work yourself? >> i do have to grade them. it's a creative program. so most of them get a's. if they show up, they're all good.

>> you were kind enough to act in one of my graduate student's short films. >> i think acting is a generous -- >> you were really good opposite kristen wig. we have the clip in the booth! ready to be played. >> let me go back a step, though. jimmy is too show it to anybody. >> it's only two lines. they're going to love it. >> i want to point something out. >> he's not showing it. we have it here ready to be shown and he's not showing it. [ cheers and applause ] >> you asked me to do this and i said yeah, all right. are the students all right with the fact that i cannot act. >> you can. >> i said what about memorizing lines? i'm not good. you said don't worry, improv it. so i get to the set.

>> were you nervous? >> i wasn't until they said do you have your lines memorized? and i was like no, i was told we were improving this. kristen knew hers. and i didn't know mine. i had to learn mine. >> that is why you looked sweaty? >> i felt bad for everybody involved. >> you can't tell that you didn't know your lines. >> i remembered them like one by one. >> you got to play it. you want him to play it? [ cheers and applause ] >> what is that? what is that? home run! >> all right. we're going to sell that movie. >> we will then show it. it doesn't make any sense otherwise. >> all right. fine. >> if you're in one of my

classes this is the caliber of acting you get. >> you will get a very local ber actor. >> can i talk about something? i'm -- i teach at ucla and usc and cal arts and i'm going to do an online film making class. that's one of the reasons i wanted to show it to show the caliber of people i get on there. >> so people can actually attend your class? >> those are like ucla and usc are two of the best film schools in the world. >> it will be low cost or for free? >> it certainly won't be the same amount as going to usc. >> why don't you do it for free? >> i'm not making money off of it. i'll tell you why. it helps pay for the kinds of classes i do. >> do you get paid as a teacher? >> i do but i put it back into the classroom. >> you do a lot of work.

i don't want to do work for free. i don't believe in education. i dropped out of college and still got a doctorate from my old school. you understand? i have a different philosophy. when we come back i want to ask you about this book. james franco is here. this is his book. ♪ >> the jimmy kimmel live concert series is brought to you by sony.

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>> bet i can guess your nickname. >> who is hitting on me? wrong. >> sting? your nickname is sting? >> i bet i know your nickname? chip, dale, chip and dale? >> what? >> never mind. >> that's not acting. that's eating. >> i don't like that. you're great in that. i don't know why you're saying that. they killed that joke. they say chip and dale doesn't make sense to me. it's in voice over. she should give you a better nickname. chip and dale sounds like a stripper. >> give your students a bad grade. >> i will change that right now. that guy got an f.

>> i want to ask you about your book. it's not a typical novel in that it's a mixture of things. at the beginning and the end of the book you make a series of statements. i don't know if they are being made by you or a character or -- >> yeah. >> so,i it's based on like a recovery book like alcoholics unanimous. >> okay. >> but not because acting is an addiction. it's more looking at, you know, like a recovery program, once you get over an addiction, it's like looking at your life to see what led to your addiction. it's looking at acting but also being able to extrapolate from that and say well,

big of a leap to say that life is interaking with people around the world. >> i have no idea what you're saying right now. >> let me clear this up. >> you made a lot of statements. >> it's a book of fiction. >> obviously, that's not true. it's a way of saying -- >> you say andy kaufman was the greatest? >> i think he is one of the greatest. >> i agree with that, too. >> but shakespeare, it says i am all actors. it is a way of coming up with this persona who is identifying with -- >> i am music and i write the songs that make the whole world sing. i write the songs of love and

special things. >> interesting. >> you say when they get older some actors that were once respected become clowns is that true? >> sort of. >> yeah. >> new movies are fantasies. somewhere along the is that true? >> i wouldn't say that's like fully me but i would say that there is something to -- i love jango. i wouldn't say that is completely true or i believe that. you could say that there was a real soul there and then in some of the others it's like he got into the grind house thing and that became primary for a little while. >> are these guys going to be mad at you for any of these

things? do you care? >> it's like a character. whether those are his opinions or not, i don't know. and i don't know if i necessarily would be mad if one of his characters -- >> let's find out. if i had that that would have been good. >> that's basically doing what he does in his movies. >> explain it to him. explain it to him. >> you can get in now, james franco, everybody. we will be right back with snoop dogg.

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from gangsta rap to reggae and now to the genre known as funk. "7 days of funk" by snoopzilla comes out december 10th. please welcome snoop dogg. [ applause ] [ cheers and applause ] >> happy birthday. yesterday was your birthday. congratulations. >> thank you. >> what did you do to guillermo? why is he in this state right now? >> what i did was i had him come in my room and sample something. >> sample. there it is.

>> what did you do for your birthd birthday? did you have a party? >> yeah. we had a party sponsored by colt 45. there was a lot of party favors and celebrities that showed up. and i was actually the d.j. >> why was i not invited. >> you know you was invited. >> i was not invited. >> this is the cake? that is some cake. do you light candles on a cake like this? >> no, you just let it burn, baby. >> who makes something like this? >> no. that come from the hood bakery. >> how do you stay so thin for so many years? >> fruits, vegetables, exercise and watching my cholesterol. >> about a year ago, somebody asked how much you smoke. you said 81 blunts a day. is that true? >> it's probably about 75 now.

>> i think that's good you're cutting back. 75. let's see. in 24 hours, that's three an hour. that's one every 20 minutes if you're smoking while you're sleeping. are you sleep smoking? >> you know what, jimmy, i think i'm smoking all day every day. >> all day every day. >> even willie nelson would have a problem keeping up with you? >> no, no, no. willie nelson is the only person that has actually smoked me out, that i had to quit. >> wow. where did that happen? >> that happened -- we were in amsterdam. it was 4:20 about three years ago. we did a concert together. >> 4:20, amsterdam, snoop dogg and willie nelson. the only one you are missing are cheech and chong. >> your son is a highly recruited high school football player i'm hearing.

a bunch of colleges are trying to get him to play. do you have a referenpreference? >> usc will always be my preference but i will be his father and support him and let him know wherever he picks i will be there with him and support him. [ applause ] >> forgive me if this is a terrible question. has any member of your family graduated from college before? >> i would have to say he will be the first one. >> that's got to make you very proud, huh? >> i mean, a lot of my family members graduate to the penitentiary or different things in life. this is a great accomplishment and we look forward to him being the first one to do it. >> i want to get this clear. right now you're snoop dogg. you have recorded an album under snoopzilla. you were snoop lion.

and in your book, snoop dog reincarnated as snoop lion. >> just call me snoop. >> snoop will cover it all. >> what happened to doggy dogg. >> the reason i changed it is i was tired of getting done doggy style. >> who was doing this to you? >> my old record label. >> interesting. have you ever been on a safari? >> yes. in africa, we went on one and what was so crazy is when we us on the bus, i'm looking for the gun. i know we got one gun if the lions trip. and the driver all he had is like the perfume to make the lions lay down and start doing all this. i was like you know what? i'm going to get in the middle of the bus because when they start eating they gonna eat all of yawl and then they will be full and i will roll right on out here. >> you were looking around for the gun. >> oh my god. >> you don't bring a gun of your

own. do you carry a gun any more? >> i don't deal with guns any more. i let that go about five years ago. i felt like when i had guns that's when i had issues and problems. when you looking for it you get it. it becomes more of an issue. now that i don't have one i have had no problems. it's been peace and love. i'm projecting the energy that comes back to me. >> that regay, that world of reggae and snoop lion, that is a positive environment. >> positive vibration and deep meditation. >> do you cook at all. >> yeah. >> what kind of stuff do you cook? >> my specialty would have to be chicken wings, rice and gravy, corn bread, mac and cheese. somebody in the crowd said mmm. >> you get in the kitchen. >> i get cracking. i make biscuits, donuts, i get cracking. >> i had no idea.

>> for your d-o double g. >> you know what would be fun? we should do a cooking segment of some kind. maybe make -- >> and i can add my little -- >> add whatever. >> it is great to see you. it has really been too long. did you know that we have known each other for 20 years? >> every time i have been in your presence, we have always had a great time and managed to have so much fun. i think back to the time when you came to bishop's house, you and adam. >> that's right. >> i got him backstage. >> green is for the money, gold is for the honey. >> that's right. >> well, let's take it all outside. we got snoop dogg, bishop, seven

days of fung. that is the new album. we will be right back with snoop dogg. to those who've encountered welcome to covered california. new, affordable health plans so you can be ready for whatever comes your way. enroll today at coveredca.com.

>> jimmy: i'd like to thank james franco, and apologize to matt damon, we ran out of time. "nightline" is next, but first his new album "7 days of funk" comes out december 10th. here with the song "faden away," snoop dogg. ♪ ♪ girl you got me faden away and i can go another day you make it hard to stay away girl you got me faden away ♪

♪ hey, hey girl you got me faden away ♪ ♪ ain't no other words to say you make it hard for me to stay ♪ ♪ girl you got me faden away, faden away and my mind it's all about you ♪ ♪ i don't what to do 'cause you have got me confused ♪ ♪ we're talking on the phone we fussing fight you 'bout that life ♪ ♪ i just wanna love you right love you right ♪ ♪ girl you got me faden away

and i can go another day you make it hard to stay away girl you got me faden away ♪ ♪ hey, hey girl you got me faden away ain't no other words to say ♪ ♪ you make it hard for me to stay girl you got me faden away faden away ♪ ♪ make time make love that's what we make looking nowadays ♪ ♪ looking like it's gonna fade see me will you see here g soul ♪ ♪ if he lose baby he gonna gain another dough what a brother know keep it on the low ♪

♪ that's what my grandma said it suppose to go feel the same we toastin and postin ♪ >> ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, the funk! ♪