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tv   Jimmy Kimmel Live  ABC  January 14, 2014 11:35pm-12:38am PST

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>> from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight, matt leblanc. from "12 years a slave", lupita nyong'o. and music from the fray. with cleto and the cletones. and now, here's jimmy kimmel! [ applause ]
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>> it was a big news day for us here in southern california. an intense day as authorities descended on the home of justin geraldo bieber. did you know his middle name is geraldo? on thursday, justin bieber was accused of egging his neighbor's house. the neighbor claimed he caused about $20,000 in damage. he throws fabrege eggs only. they got in a yelling match. they were cursing back and forth. it was very unbaby, baby, baby like. then about a dozen sheriff's deputies showed up at his house with a search warrant. i guess they're looking for eggs. i don't know. they areed his friends. police found drugs in plain view. first they thought it was cocaine. now they believe it might be ecstacy. the friend arrested is a rapper named little za. of all of justin's friends, i
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never thought it would be l lil za. bieber did not speak to investigators today. he's going to do that when his lawyer is present. apparently police were in the house looking for security camera footage to see if there was any video evidence to support his neighbor's claim that justin egged the house. maybe to find some discarded egg shell casings or something. is i think it's funny a dozen sheriff's deputies sho up because justin bieber egged a case. they're definitely taking this seriously. >> county sheriff deputies searcheds justin bieber's home today. they defended that you are response to a home being egged. >> i can confirm that at 7:17 a.m. today, sheriff's deputies issued a search warrant at the home of justin bieber. our officers were pursuing
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evidence that a felony had been committed in reference to the -- hey! hey! hey you little [ bleep ]. get him! hey, hey! >> jimmy: with we'll bring you all details as they develop. before you go to bed, say a prayer for lil za. this is fun. i don't know who shot this or who the guy in the video is, but someone was on a flight and the man sitting next to him fell asleep. and i guess this guy had been work on his laptop and dozed off with his finger on the slash key. he's sleeping and the screen just keeps filling up with slashes. maybe this is some kind of weird conceptual art. but probably not. the worst part is he's now going to have to spend the whole flight home with his finger on the delete key to get rid of it. the sale of marijuana for recreational use began in
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colorado at the beginning of the year. already it's causinging a rise in criminal activity. thieves on interstate 70 outside of denver have been stealing this 420 mile marker sign. the sign has been stolen so often the colorado department of transportation actually changed it for real to 419.99. that must have blown some stoners' minds. whoa. what does that mean? am i dead? it's been difficult for authorities to identify suspects because it's very difficult to pull fingerprints that are covered in cheeto dust. interesting fact. your success in life is inversely proportional to the number of stolen traffic signs you display in your home. colorado officials are also concerned there's going to be an uptick in the number of people driving while under the influence of marijuana. they're hiring what they call drug recognition experts whose job it is to determine whether drivers have been smoking pot.
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what they do is, it's interesting. they carry around a tiny tv with a "full house" marathon play on it. and they full you over. if you watch more than six hours of it, you busted. this is good, i don't know what these guys are doing to relax, but they are relaxed. this is surveillance footage from a golf shop featuring two men, ryan and billy are their names. watch the action here, and pay special attention here to their reaction at the end. >> yeah. >> hey, ron. >> hey, billy. [ applause ] >> jimmy: what does it take to excite these guys? does this happen a lot?
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the rollout of the affordable care act continues to be terrible. first, there was technical problems with the healthcare.gov website. now comes news that not enough young and healthy americans are signing up for coverage, which is crucial for the success of the program. the way insurance works is you need all the young healthy people to pay for the insurance and not use it until they get old and unhealthy. and so far, only a quarter of the 2.2 million people who signed up were between 18 to 34. 24%. the white house was hoping closer to 38%. why they would hope that, i don't know. they expect young people to buy insurance the same time the play station 4 comes out? you know, if you want young people to sign up, maybe you should have made it a law that you can stay on your parent's plan until they're 26. no thanks, mom and dad, i've got the premiums covered now. the deadline to sign up is march 31. in my experience, if you want young people to do something, all you have to do is tell them specifically not to do
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something. or give ten free lives in candy crush to the first subscribers. the obama administration is rolling out a new ad campaign that's targeted specifically as the young and vibrant. >> hi. i'm alex. this is my wife martha. we're both approaching the bix s -oh. >> and we have health care issues to deal with. but fortunately we don't have to pay for it. >> no, you do. >> you young people are pay for our drugs and our doctors. >> not to mention our social security and our medicare. you know why? >> because you don't vote. >> and we do. >> martha, let's go find that lavitra. >> next time, maybe pick up a newspaper. . >> jimmy: here's a guy who should probably sign up for
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health care quickly. as you can see, this gentleman is about to do a back flip off a roof. don't worry, h he's going to be just fine. what could possibly go wrong in a situation like this. i mean, he obviously has practiced this with a helmet on and knows what he's doing. clearly he's a professional and -- he actually made it! i was going to say, i was honestly, i was shocked by that when i saw the video. otherwise, what's the point? there you are, just wasted 30 seconds of your life. the watchdog agency that monitors government spending has just revealed that penis pumps between the years 2006 and 2011 cost the u.s. medicare program how much? $172 million. i didn't even know penis pumps were a real thing.
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i thought it was like x-ray specs or something. but apparently they are. they're one of the available treatments for ereck tile dysfunction. medicare paid for almost 500,000 of them. imagine how countries that we owe money to feel about that. they're over there blowing it on penis pumps. i don't want to be reactionary. i know a lot of these programs sound dumber than they actually are when you analyze them, but it does seem like a waste. although some americans seem to be pretty happy about it. >> hi. we just wanted to say thank you for the penis pump. >> i can't believe you got this for me. you guys are the greatest. now back to your unpaid internships. >> you're bad. >> let me show you how bad. >> the affordable care act. >> jimmy: we're going to take a break. when we come back, mitt romney danced over the weekend. i'm going to show you footage of
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that. plus, the pedestrian question matt leblanc, lupita nyong'o and music from the fray. stay with us. ♪ she can't control herself around chocolate. she'll devour you. really? yeah, uh, thanks for introducing us. anything for a friend.
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>> jimmy: tonight on the show from "12 years a slave," lupita nyong'o is here. do you remember mitt romney who almost became president? now that he's running for office, h he's drinking his middleweighting cold, putting nickels in his penny loafers, the whole thing. on saturday, he was at arizona state university giving a speech at a conference for young single members of the mormon church.
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they had a band performing and somehow that band coaxed mitt on stage to teach him to do the ga gangnam style dance. let's see how mitt did with that. >> jimmy: it looked like a mouse crawled up his dockers. let's see that in slow meengs analyze it. it's almost an i rash jig. in his defense, we would all dance like this without the help of alcohol, too. and he's a 66-year-old guy. what do you expect, bruno mars? in fact, we conducted an experiment to see if mitt's dancing is in line with other men his age. we sent a camera crew to the farmer's market in l.a. to ask the yesmen there, a simple question, can you dance? and tonight's "pedestrian
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question." we will see a guy introduce himself and then we'll pause the video. we'll try to guess together whether or not he can dance. this is a little bit subjective. but i think we'll be able to come to an consensus. let's cosee. >> can you dance? >> no! >> jimmy: let's find out. >> no. >> all right, let's see it. >> you're right. >> i can't dance. >> jimmy: he was honest at least. let's meet our next gentleman. >> brian. brian burch. >> brian, can you dance? >> yeah! >> jimmy: can brian dance? >> can i dance? yes. >> let's see it. ♪
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>> jimmy: i don't know why he doesn't have shoes on. moves like that cannot be contained by shoes. who else do we have? >> robert. >> can you dance? >> jimmy: yeah! >> jimmy: a couple of no's. but boy, an outfit like thiat, e better be able to dance. >> of course. >> let's see it. ♪ >> jimmy: he's good. he was one of the zombies in thriller. who else is there? >> my name is barry jacobs. >> barry, can you dance? >> no! >> jimmy: can barry dance? let's find out. >> not really. >> go ahead, prove it.
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♪ >> jimmy: he's the barry whitest is what he is. i don't know what that was. that was not dancing, though. next up. >> my name is kurt miller. >> kurt, can you dance? >> jimmy: more yeses then no's? i don't know what you're basing that on. let's find out. >> no. i have two left feet. >> let's see them. ♪ >> jimmy: he looks like he's work on the runway at an airport. i bet he's good at other stuff. how many more? two more? >> where are you from? >> originally brooklyn, new york. now here in l.a.
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>> seymour, can you dance? >> yeah! >> jimmy: everyone wants to seymour gan dance. he can barely get that hat on his head. >> i can dance, i can dance. >> let's see it. ♪ >> jimmy: seymour is about ten times better at dancing than i am. one more. >> samuel, can you dance? >> no! >> jimmy: all right, most everyone says no. which surprises me. let's find out if -- what's his name? who cares what his name is. >> oh, of course. >> hit it. ♪
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>> jimmy: tonight on the show, from the movie "12 years a sleeve, lupita nyong'o is here. we have music from the fray and we'll be right back with matt leblanc. stick around.
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>> jimmy: tonight on the program from the golden globe-winning movie "12 years a slave," the very beautiful golden globe nominee lupita nyong'o is here. and then their new album "helios" comes out february 25th, the fray from the sony outdoor stage. tomorrow night, meryl streep will be with us, joseph gordon-levitt will be here and we'll have music from jonny lang. and on thursday chris pine. from shark tank, kevin o'leary and music from gregory porter. one of our studio members have a great idea for shark tank. i won't say what it is. i don't want to ruin it. our first guest became a house hold name playing one of the world's most beloved joeys,
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right behind the baby dang radio. -- kangaroo. now, he returns to the role he was born to play --himself --on the 3rd season of the very funn was born to play --himself --on the 3rd season of the very funny watch it sundays at 10:30 on showtime, please welcome matt leblanc. [ applause ] >> jimmy: i mentioned this to you before both on television and off. but the show is so funny. it's very, very funny. >> this is a good show, yeah. >> jimmy: no, not this show. >> oh, sorry. >> jimmy: this show has its moments. but your show, of course, i'm talking about. which is really, really good. >> oh, thanks. >> jimmy: you play matt leblanc on the show. and there's no one better for that. >> yeah, that's an audition that went really well. >> jimmy: you nailed that one. what i don't understand is you
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shoot the show in london but it takes place here in l.a. for the most part. and that doesn't -- i don't know why -- it seems like you would have more clout than that. unless you want to go to london. >> anything to get out of the house for me. no, it's just a budget reasons to shoot it there. and the production company is based in the uk. >> jimmy: i see. that's where they kind of conceived it and that's where it is. do you like living over there? are you there for long periods of time? >> about three months a year. we do nine episodes a year. it's fun. london is a lot of fun. it's great. >> jimmy: people think the food is bad in london, but it really isn't bad. it's very, very good food in london. >> the food is awesome there. yeah. >> jimmy: do you go out to restaurants. do you hang out a lot? >> i found a couple of local haunts. there's a great -- i stay at the same hotel now. been doing it for three years. just got picked up for a fourth year, so i'll be going back again. but right across the street from
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the hotel is this great little pub. so i've been going in there. and they have fish and chips, which is, you know, when in rome -- or london. >> jimmy: are the fish and chips better in london than they are -- than you can get around here? >> you know it's funny, they have that kind of thing. you see these places, the world's best cup of coffee. stuff like that. best fish and chips in london. there's a lot of places that say that. but it's all better, i hate to say it, than what you can get here. it's pretty authentic. >> jimmy: what i love about london is people are drinking all the time. they seem to be in the middle of the work day at a pub drinking. you don't see that here anymore. >> yeah. functioning alcoholics really thrive. it is socially acceptably encouraged actually. it's great. and it doesn't have that stigma
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that it has here. >> jimmy: if you watch an old episode of "bewitched" and larry tate and darren are getting bombed in the middle of the day. hey, let me pour you a cocktail. that's still going on over there. >> yeah, oh, yeah. >> jimmy: do you sense that's going to stop or are they in it for the long run? >> pubs are pretty full. >> jimmy: so do you ever have a few and then work? >> no, no, no, no. unfortunately no. >> jimmy: have you ever acted drunk in your like? >> professionally or? >> jimmy: have you ever acted while drunk in your life i should say. >> and gotten paid for it? once. >> jimmy: one time? >> yeah, a long time ago i did a music video for a bob seager song "night moves." >> jimmy: i was going to ask you about this actually. yeah. and so it was, like, the third season of "friends." and the director who i was friends with called me up and
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said hey, we're doing this video for "night moves" do you want to be the hero guy? sure, yeah, okay. so i go out there and it's at this drive-in movie theatre. so i go through makeup and everything. and i'm ready, waiting. and i'm in this little box basically. and they knock on the door and they say bob seager would like to talk to you in his motor home for a minute. so i go see bob seager. i go in there. and he's this really nice guy. and it's really humble and whips out a bottle of tequila, like an hour and a half later, i'm hammered. and he's hammered. and my friend who is with me, we're all drunk. okay, ready for you on set. i was like oh, god, no. so you can kind of tell in the video. >> jimmy: it's funny. because i was going to play a little clip of thf video. but let's see if you look drunk in the video. >> jimmy: that's you.
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♪ >> jimmy: yeah, a little bit. something going on. >> yep, yep. >> jimmy: was she drunk as well? >> i don't think so. >> jimmy: johnny from "the big bang theory" he was in that as well. he got lucky in the backseat of a drive-in. >> jimmy: you did a bon jovi video, didn't you? >> i did. the same director. that was before "friends" a long time ago. that's how i got the "night moves" gig. you've got to keep the relationships alive. but that was fun, too. >> jimmy: did you work with jon bon jovi. did you get drunk with him before the thing? >> no, no, after. no. but there was a funny story to that one, too. in the story boards, you know, all these guys on motorcycles ride down to mexico for the weekend. and into this little village. and there's a big wedding that
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lets out. a big fiesta. and these guys are all partying in the bar and they eat the worm out of the tequila bottle. all fake. anticipate then at the end in the story board, the pretty girl in the video is supposed to get on jon's bike. and we all ride off. so we're getting ready to shoot that part of it. he goes over to the director. i see him talking to him and he comes over to me and says hey, listen, the girl is supposed to get on my bike and ride away. but if we do it that way, my wife is going to kill me. so let's have her get on your bike. yeah, sure, why not? okay. >> jimmy: must have been some trouble in the bon jovi household at that time. it seems like it all worked out for him. for both of you, really. matt leblanc is here. [music - artist: hanan townshend "aware
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>> the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is brought to you by sony. with passion.s filled and medicine, law, business, engineering - these are noble pursuits and necessary to sustain life. but poetry, beauty, romance, love - these are what we stay alive for. to quote from whitman, "o me, o life of the questions of these recurring. of the endless trains of the faithless. of cities filled with the foolish. what good amid these, o me, o life? answer: that you are here. that life exists and identity. that the powerful play goes on, and you may contribute a verse." "that the powerful play goes on, and you may contribute a verse." what will your verse be?
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>> some ning things aren't your concern. >> tell me what it is and i'll see if i agree. is it something serious? >> we're not having this conversation. >> i care. tell me. >> no. >> you're starting to freak me out. is it cancer? >> no, it is not cancer. >> well, i don't know. is it bev? does she -- >> no. no one has cancer!
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>> he has cancer. >> jimmy: that's just a little example. it's not a flattering portrayal of yourself i would say. >> no, it's not. which is kind of fun. it seems like as the seasons go on, things get worse and worse and worse for my character, which ultimately is great for me. because in real life i feel better about myself. >> jimmy: what is happening to the tv matt leblanc this season, this new season. >> so it starts off the morning after we ended the second season. and things are just getting worse and dealing with the ramifications of sleeping with my stalker, labia, which -- yep,
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that's her name. and my ex-wife wants to take my kids away because of that. because she showed up at their school and stuff. so that's getting bad. the ratings on my show within the show are just plummeting. and i want to get off the show so i go to the writers and ask them to kill me off of the show, on a comedy. and they're like we can't do that. sure you can. it's a comedy. do it funny, i don't care how you do it. it just gets worse and worse. it all collides again. >> jimmy: can i ask you for a favor for guillermo actually. he wants to get a picture with you before we go. and could we -- would you mind? >> yeah, sure. >> jimmy: come over and -- where's guillermo? okay, here he is.
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just put your head through your spot there. >> yeah, if you could just -- there you go. yeah, a sucking face. like you're drinking a milk shake. good, good, good. would you mind doing one more? >> one more? >> jimmy: yeah, yeah. guillermo, you could take your head out of there. we watch you on "episodes" together here at the office. we would love to get the picture of the three of us together. would you mind? >> absolutely. >> i'm just going to stick my head in down here. >> okay, all right, very good. so anyway, thank you for doing
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that. we really appreciate it. actually one more thing if you don't mind. we -- i loved you and tony danza in "who's the bos." would you mind if we got a picture together? >> that was tony danza. >> jimmy: let's just get the picture, okay? if you just wouldn't mind. >> yeah. okay. you haven't changed a bit. you really haven't. got it? we got it? okay, great. and thank you so much. thanks so much, matt. oh, you know what, there's one more thing that i wanted to ask. and if you have one more minute. i loved you so much on "the cosby show." and i would love if we could get a picture with growler, our
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cameraman. >> he can, he can, he can. yeah, yeah. >> jimmy: go ahead and put your face in there. and matt, if you would just put your head in there and i will get right next to you here. got it? very good. thank you so much. that's matt leblanc, everybody. he grew up right before our eyes. and growler, too. the show is called "episodes." watch it sunday night at 10:30. we'll be right back with lupita nyong'o. >> portions of "jimmy kimmel live" are brought to you by burger king. get a delicious smooth roast small coffee free with the purchase of any savory breakfast sandwich. only at burger king. where taste is king. a honda.... i was coming from a 2007 honda accord.
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>> jimmy: our next guest is a very gifted actress who received a golden globe nomination for her film debut. the movie is called "12 years a slave." please welcome lupita nyong'o. [ applause ] >> you look fantastic. i love that dres, i have to say. surfers on it. >> yeah, surfer dudes all over it. >> jimmy: did i pronounce your name correctly? lupita nyong'o? >> that's good enough. >> jimmy: will you tell me how to do it perfectly? >> lupita nyong'o. >> jimmy: no, not really. they told me it's like gnochi. >> i think it's more like song.
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nyong'o. >> jimmy: your first job out of the school you get nominated for a golden globe and your movie wins a golden globe. >> i know. >> you studied acting at yale. your classmates must hate you, right? >> they're actually supportive. >> jimmy: that's nice. and there you are on stage with -- and the audience with every major actor in the world. >> i know. i was -- it felt like my tv had broken and they had all fallen into my living room. >> jimmy: did you get to speak and meet to a lot of people you wanted to meet? >> i had a checklist. we created a checklist of all the people we needed to meet. >> jimmy: who was on the list? >> there was cate blanchette and meryl streep and leonardo dicaprio. i watched him in "romeo &
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juliet." i made it happen. i said i'm very sorry to bother you. i'm lupita nyong'o and i've been dying to meet you since "romeo & juliet." >> jimmy: was he friendly? >> his mother took a picture of us. >> jimmy: really? that's nice. >> yes, yes. >> jimmy: little weird handing his mom the camera, i guess. but she's probably used to that at this point. >> she did it for yourself. >> jimmy: did you get a copy of it? >> i had a camera for myself. >> jimmy: you ear not having to text with the mother and figure out the whole thing. >> just give me his number. >> jimmy: very interesting background. you were born in mexico. you hear that guillermo? he was also born in mexico. yet you turned out very differently. >> yeah. i got a lot more sun than he did. >> jimmy: your parents are
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originally from kenya. and you moved back to kenya? >> yeah. i moved back to kenya before i turned 1. so all my life i lived in kenya. but then my parents sent me back to mexico when i was 16 to learn spanish. >> jimmy: oh, they did? i love they gave you a traditional mexican name even though they were just there for a short time. >> in your tradition, it's custom to name your childs after the events of the day. so i was born in mexico so they thought it would be fit to give me a mexican name. >> jimmy: after the events of the day. so today it would be justin bieber egged somebody's house nyong'o. i didn't know that. and so growing up in kenya, did you watch -- did you get friends? >> oh, yes. most definitely. i was a friends buff. >> jimmy: what other shows did you watch over there? >> i watched "full house." and "step by step."
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and "fresh prince of bel air." and "hanging with mr. cooper." >> jimmy: oh, wow. that's interesting. so you probably think that mr. cooper -- oh, you've probably got to think he's the biggest star in all of america. >> oh, y e, i did. wh . >> jimmy: when was the first time you came to the united states? >> back in 1999. i spent the entire time on video games. i did that and i also went to knotsberry farm. >> jimmy: you didn't like it? >> no, because i watched "step by step." and it was my first time on a roller coaster. and in "step by step." >> jimmy: that was patrick duffy and susan somers, correct? >> yeah. >> jimmy: in the opening credits, they look like they're having fun. everybody is waving. so i went on the longest wooden roller coaster at knotsberry
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farm. that's the first ride i went to. i was waving like they did in "step by step." and then my waving came to an abrupt end when we started falling down. and i was just so scared i couldn't even scream any longer. when the ride ended i was holding so tight on to the bar and they had to come and say if you don't get off now you're going to go again. and then i just ran off. >> jimmy: wow. >> it was traumatic. >> jimmy: those are your memories your first trip to the united states. i'm surprised you ever came back. you know, when i think of kenya, here in the united states, we think of great athletes, but we don't necessarily think of actors. is this a -- is -- are there a lot of famous actors and a big industry there? >> it's definitely a fledgling industry, but growing up, i didn't know of anyone who was just acting. everyone is acting and doing other things as well.
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>> jimmy: i see. so it's more of a hobby? >> yeah, more of a hobby, but now it's definitely grow into an industry. >> jimmy: were people back home very, very excited with all of your success? >> oh, most definitely. >> jimmy: oh, okay, yeah. the word from home is that i'm definitely more famous than my father now. >> jimmy: than your father. what does your father do? >> he's a senator? . >> jimmy: oh, wow. does he like that? >> i think he's having a little trouble with it. no, but he loves me. >> you know, maybe don't invite him to the oscars then. well, it's great to have you here. congratulations on your success. >> thank you. >> jimmy: lupita nyong'o! "12 years a slave" is in theatres now. when we come back music from the fray.
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>> jimmy: i'd like to thank matt leblanc, lupita nyong'o and apologize to matt damon, we ran out of time. nightline is next. but first, their album "helios" comes out february 25th. here with the song, "love don't die," the fray. [ applause ] ♪ ♪ if i know one thing that's true it ain't what you say it's what you do ♪ ♪ and you don't say much yeah that's true but i listen when you do ♪ ♪ a thousand years go by but love don't die ♪ ♪ if i know one thing that's true instead i'm never leaving you ♪ ♪ and you don't say much
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yeah that's true but i lose it when you do ♪ ♪ don't let them tell no lie love don't die ♪ ♪ no matter where we go or even if we don't and even if they try ♪ ♪ they'll never take my body from your side love don't die ♪ ♪ if there is one thing that's true it's not what i say it's what i do ♪ ♪ and i say too much yeah that's true so just listen to what i do ♪
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♪ a thousand years go by love don't die ♪ ♪ no matter where we go or even if we don't and even if they try ♪ ♪ they'll never take my body from your side love don't die ♪ ♪ she can break it up shake your money down you can box it in bury it in the ground ♪ ♪ you can close it off and turn it away try to keep it down ♪ ♪ six feet in the ground but love don't die ♪ ♪ no matter where we go or even if we don't and even if they try ♪ ♪ they'll never take my body from your side love don't die ♪ ♪ no matter where we go or even if we don't
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and even if they try ♪ ♪ they'll never take my body from your side love don't die ♪ ♪ we're on an open bed truck on the highway rain is coming down and we're on the run ♪ ♪ think i can feel the breath in your body we gotta keep on running til' we see the sun ♪ ♪ oh you gotta fire and it's burnin' in the rain thought that it went out but it's burnin' just the same ♪ ♪ and you don't look back not for anything thank you, jimmy. thank you very much.
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tonight on nigh line. taking hostage of a 7-eleven. a standoff with a woman lies in the balance. we're going inside the mind of a hostage negotiator. with seconds to make the call, do you pull the trigger? >> these are huge, right? >> they call it a magic stone. green fire from the mountains of colombia, where few dare to go. >> do you hear that dynamite? let's get out of here. plus, raid on bieber. justin bieber's mansion searched in the wake of an egg assault on a neighbor's house.

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