>> have a good night, everyone. >> announcer: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonigh, nicole kidman, alyson hannigan, and music from jerrod niemann with cleto and the cletones. and now, pace yourselves, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ]

>> that's very kind. i want to give you an update with something that's going on personally with me right now. if you watched the show last night, you know there's a tarantula in my pool. it's dead. apparently it had kansas in the ncaa bracket and decided to kill itself. but i don't know what to do about it. i went home last night after the show and it was still there, which thank god, i guess. if it had disappeared it would mean it got out and it was lurking somewhere. but it's in there, and the thing is, i don't want to call, like, a maintenance guy come get it because it will make me look like a wimp. but i also don't want to get it myself because i am a wimp. so isle just move, i guess. i don't know. does anybody know after a reasonably priced hermetically

sealed box i can live in? marnl madness resumes on thursday with the sweet 16. and while there have been many shining stars during the ncaa tournament so far, new of them have shined brighter than this member of the stanford marching band. >> turnover in the first half. >> that's alex chang. he's not having a fit. he's a 22-year-old senior who became a sensation playing cowbell during stanford's game against kansas on sunday. and alex is here sitting in with the cletones. [ applause ] >> jimmy: thank you for being here. do you major in cowbell? >> no, no, no, no. actually, i mayor in mechanical engineering. >> jimmy: so are you technically a member of the babd? >> absolutely. >> jimmy: you are? okay. so that the only instrument you play? >> no, i'm a member of the drum

section. >> jimmy: is that a demotion to be the cowbell guy? >> does it look like a demotion? >> jimmy: well, now it doesn't. when you're playing, do cows ever come? do they hear you and -- >> oh, i wish. but that would probably cause a scene when they all run on to the court. >> jimmy: all right. well, very good. i loved the most popular player in the tournament is a cowbell player. thank you for coming, alex chang. he have jerrod niemann, alyson hanigan and nicole kidman is here.

the last time nicole kidman was here, the overweight matt damon tied me up. but the good news was this happened. at that moment, i became a man, right here on television. we'll see what nicole has in store for me tonight. i'm hoping she gets me pregnant, who knows. there's some more bad weather news for the east coast. a bigg onor'easter is grewing. am i the only one bothered by the word nor'easter? can't we just say north? you can only say nor if you're a sea captain in the early 1900s. i'm not completely certain, but listen closely to the prime minister and let me know what you think happened here. >> a number of countries have

announced their intention to hand over uranium to the u.s. [ faring noises ] >> i don't want anyone who jump to conclusions. >> as chairman of this summit, i naturally welcome this announcement. >> jimmy: and he just kept on going. well, they did invent the dutch oven over there. anthony weiner is back. thank you, god. the website business insider announced that mr. weiner will write a monthly column for them which is dumb. they should have put them in charge of their twitter account. the column will be called, and i'm not joking, it will be called weiner with an exclamation point at the end. you want to read it, just google the word weiner.

so there you have it, anthony weiner is back and he's writhing a column for business insiderer. i think the person he got in trouble in the first place was for wanting to put his business insider. >> jimmy: first ever cowbell rim shot. "people's court" has been on for what 30 years now? and it's still good. this episode in particular. a guy who goes by the name of ron was accused of hit and run. but the judge sided with him. the judge was not convinced that he did hit the plaintiff and run. but during his post court interview, which was always the best part. ron offered an interesting theory about who did. >> it's good to see you alive. >> yes, yes, yes. i don't know, maybe this guy was on something. maybe d hit him. who knows. >> he was calling you the suspect. >> see, i don't know. like i said, d hit him.

it wasn't me. >> it was d. >> d is nuts. >> they're making a mockery of the fake courtroom. >> high five yourself when you do something like that? how many of you in our audience tonight filled out an ncaa tournament bracket? did you? >> i did, in fact. >> jimmy: you were allowed to fill out the bracket when you're part of the brand? >> i guess, yeah. >> jimmy: who did you take to go all the way? >> michigan state spartans. >> jimmy: you didn't take your own school? >> guilty. >> jimmy: that cow bell is going to wind up somewhere you don't want it when they find out. i found in general march brackets are like children.

nobody wants to hear about yours. but there's something nice about filling out paper brackets with pens and folding them up and tearing them into a little angry pieces when you're done with them. it's like we all become ammish for three weeks. but warren buffett offered $1 brl for anyone who picked a perfect ncaa bracket. it was an interesting idea, but because of all the upsets, everyone who reg sterd was eliminated after the first 25 games. no one even has a chance anymore. now if you want to make $1 billion, you have to do it the old fashioned way by creating a website that lets you see 900 pictures of your high school friends' kids every day. i don't care who wins. i'm definitely out. i've never done worse. it's like i can't even see the future anymore. but it is disappointing when your bracket gets busted early on. but if you like many americans find yourself in that situation, there's a new product on the market that may be of help.

>> are you suffering from depression because your bracket is busted? ask your doctor about get the [ bleep ] back to work. it's a safe and effective pain reliever. answer e-mails, send faxes, even pay attention in meetings. don't sit around the office cursing dayton. get the [ bleep ] back to work. side effects may include productivity, vacation pay and earning your keep. get the [ bleep ] back to work. >> available at walgreen's. >> jimmy: when we come back from the break, we're going to speak to a girl scout who sold more than 18,000 boxes of cookies this year. also we're going to go around on hollywood boulevard to ask children what curse words they know. and they know a lot of them, it turns out. nicole kidman is here. alyson hannigan is here. and jerrod niemann.

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>> jimmy: welcome back. what is your favorite song to play on the cow bell? >> probably honky tonk movie from "tthe rolling stones. >> there is some good cow bell

on that. >> jimmy: he's another young person doing amazing things. you probably know girl scout cookie season just wrapped up. there should be a rule if your daughter comes to the office to sell girl scout cookies, you lose a sick day, right? anyway, a 12-year-old scout from oklahoma city just broke the record for most boxes of girl scout cookies sold in a year. her name is katie francis. in just seven weeks she sold 18,107 boxes of cookies. that is $72,000 worth of cookies for which katie gets 59 cent sew on patch. sweet scam they're running over there. kate had an interesting strategy. what she did was she knocked on the door of willie nelson's tour bus. when i was a kid i was never

able to sell any of the stuff i was supposed to believe sells. she joins us live via skype from her home in oklahoma city. katie, are you there? >> yes, how are you? >> jimmy: i'm doing well, thank you. >> would you like to buy some girl scout cookies? >> jimmy: you go right in for the kill, don't you? yeah, i would. but let me ask you a few questions first, okay? >> can i say hi to guillermo first? >> jimmy: yes. he's right over here. >> hi, guillermo? >> hi, katie. >> would you like to buy girl scout cookies? >> sure, i love cookies. >> how many would you like to buy? >> two. >> how about 22? >> okay. >> jimmy: katie, what i would really love to hear is how you were able to -- >> can i say hi to the audience? >> jimmy: the whole audience?

all right, i guess so. >> hi, audience. would you like to buy some girl scout cookies. i'm going to need your names. so let's start with the lady in the colorful scarf. >>. >> jimmy: i'm going to be honest. i feel like you're using me and the show to sell cookies. and i'm a little hurt by that. >> i'm sorry. i know what will make you feel better. a crisp, delicious samoa. >> jimmy: thank you, katie. that is katie francis who is -- >> oh, some thin mints or dosidos. >> jimmy: okay, thank you, katie. she's a very aggressive sales person i think is what we're trying to get across here. 22 box, huh? >> that's a lot. >> jimmy: i showed this video

last night. it's a young boy. he was asked by his uncle to list all the curse words he knows and it turns out he knows some pretty good ones. >> tell me all the bad words you know. >> crap, shut up, butt head butt hole and butt crack. butt nose. butt face. butt head. butt mouth. butt cheek. and [ bleep ] >> jimmy: i don't know what age kids start talking like that because they hide it from you when you're their parents. we sent a camera out on

hollywood boulevard today. we asked kids to tell us all the bad words they know. >> do you any dirty words? >> dirty words? >> yes. >> tell me some naughty words. >> stupid. hush. and shut up. >> dumb. >> punk. >> stupid, poop, you're ugly. >> i know ass. i know bitch. >> i hate you. you look stupid. >> donkeys.

>> screwed. and sucked. >> i don't know any naughty words. >> you don't know any naughty words. >> [ bleep ]. >> i think i know dumb and [ bleep ] and i know stupid. >> s-h-i-t-h. i mean s-h-i [ bleep ]. >> thank you. that makes more sense. >> [ bleep ] >> jimmy: music from jerrod niemann and we'll be back with nicole kidman.

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>> jimmy: tonight on the show, the final season of "how i met your mother." alex hanig-- alyson hannigan is us. and jerrod niemann from the at&t stage. tomorrow night julia louis-dreyfus will be here, from the movie "cesar chavez" michael peña will join us and we'll have music from london grammar. and on thursday jason bateman will be here, from "scandal" katie lowes, and music from john legend. our first guest tonight was born in america, raised in australia and then, like a boomerang, she came twirling right back at us. she's the academy award-winning star of many memorable films. her newest is called "the railway man." it opens april 11th.

please welcome nicole kidman. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you for coming. you look very beautiful. the last time you were here, i was tied up. matt damon tied me up. and you made probably the greatest entrance any guest has ever made in the 11 years of this show. i mean, that was really something. >> i'm not doing that tonight. well, you never know. >> jimmy: we'll see what happens. do we have that tape? let's examine this. >> oh, no. that's you. and then the guy on the share, that's me. and then >> oh, my god!

[ applause ] >> get that off! it was so not that long. >> jimmy: those were the three most magical seconds of my life. where did you learn to do that? i mean, that was -- >> i've had many lives. >> jimmy: let's go back to which ever one that came from. >> they teach you for different roles certain things. i learned that for some role. >> jimmy: you learn all sorts of -- >> that was for "paper boy." >> jimmy: when you're an actor, you have to learn to, like, be a sniper, and then you're juggling and then you're -- >> that's one of the great things, that you do to get this education in so many different fields. i mean, obviously that's not really an education. >> jimmy: it was for me.

it was more of a -- your husband keith urban discussed this. did you call and warn him. >> i didn't know he came on the show. but no, after i did it, i warned him. he was pretty cool. i've done some pretty out there films. and he's like what are you doing now? all right. >> jimmy: he doesn't have any problem with that sort of thing? >> i mean, he's a musician and he's been around the block. >> jimmy: got you. >> let's just get off this. >> jimmy: this is getting worse and worse. >> i didn't know until today that you were born in the united states. you were born -- i thought you were born in australia. i didn't realize it was a fake accent. >> i was born in hawaii. but i have a hawaiian name. >> jimmy: what is it? >> hokailani.

i was named after the baby elephant at the zoo. >> really? >> that's what my mother told me. >> jimmy: were you a chubby baby? >> she loves elephants. >> jimmy: then you guys moved back to australia. >> my dad was study, he got his ph.d.. we moved to washington then we moved back to australia. but yes, i have duel citizenship. >> do your kids have duel citizenship, too? >> jimmy: what are the advantages to having dual citizenship? >> you have to make sure you go in on the right passport and go out op the right passport otherwise it causes problems. >> jimmy: oh, right. there's two of them. u.s. on one side then you flip it over and you're like i'm from here, too. >> no, you just have more stuff in your bag. >> i just did a film where i

learned -- i actually had just done a film where i learned to throw nooifs. >> jimmy: that's a good skill to have. >> goes well with the lap dancing. >> jimmy: you throw them at people or are you throwing at -- >> i was throwing it at a bear. pad d'ington bear is a film that i did that's coming out later. it's a kid's movie. it doesn't sound like it with the knife throwing. he's not a cartoon bear. he's like a little bear. >> jimmy: and you're throwing knives at him. >> he's adorable. well, they had to bring that down because it was too scary for the kids. i sort of do stuff, i get very intense and i learn it properly and do it properly. they were like no, no, this is way too much for a kid's movie. >> jimmy: did that surprise someone? >> but i can twirl a knife now. >> jimmy: are they sharp knives

or stunt nooifs? >> sharp knives. >> jimmy: do you do it at denner to intentertain? >> i do it for shock value. i'll do it next time. you have to have me back. >> jimmy: i would be black to have you back. >> guillermo, go get a bunch of knives. nicole kid nan is here. >> the jimmy kimmel live concert series is presented by at&t. rethink possible.

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>> i don't believe in this code of silence that you have. i really don't. you may be determined to stay sdru screw up and suffer for the rest of your life, but i don't know that for eric. he's a wonderful man. i've seen him. i love him and i want him back. >> jimmy: that is nicole kidman. "the railway man." you're not talking about your husband keith in that clip. >> it's a true story. i play a woman called patty lomax. she's married to a man who had been in world war ii and had been severely tortured. it's actually about forgiveness. and it's about learning to forgive. but it's a really beautiful -- i play a supporting role in it, but i really loved the essence and the theme of the film. >> jimmy: i know you have the premier tonight right here.

is that a fun thing for you still? the big premier of your film? >> yeah. it's -- i mean, for something like this, there's films that you do that are sheer entertainment. and then there's films that -- or this is -- this is how i choose things. films that have a purpose and a meaning. and this is a film that i feel has a strong meaning. >> jimmy: is it strange to go to a film premier when you're doing a serious film and you cut loose afterwards? >> so much of film making is you don't get response. when you make a film, it pretty much goes out into the world and that's it. whereas if you're doing a play, you're getting feedback immediately. so it's actually quite nice. you feel ahh, people are seeing it and responding to things. >> jimmy: are your kids interested in what you do for a living? >> my daughter, my oldest daughter is interested in acting and my youngest daughter is

interested in music. so we're a divided family. >> jimmy: do you go on the road with keith? >> yeah. >> jimmy: you stay in the bus and everything? >> yeah, i love it. >> jimmy: it must be a nice bus, huh? >> yeah. >> jimmy: i imagine you pull into a truck stop somewhere, six people are going to -- >> no, no. i mean, we look pretty rough when we get off that bus. >> jimmy: i can't imagine that's true. >> my hair is everywhere, the kids are in their pajamas. >> jimmy: do the kids like the bus, too? >> they love the bus. i they get movimovies. they're kind of struck. you get to go catering. no, no we've been known to do that. >> jimmy: you do? >> it just depends. >> jimmy: will you go through a drive through place? >> yeah. >> jimmy: really?

i can't even imagine. >> it depends on the night. >> jimmy: but they get to watch movies. but they also get to be side stage. even though my oldest daughter can't. she's like oh, i so don't want to go and watch daddy play. i'm like at least act a little bit enthusiastic. >> jimmy: your other daughter -- >> the little one will stand with her guitar side stage. and she's 3. i say to her, you stick with that guitar and you can be out there on the stage with your dad. so she's heading to that. >> jimmy: and she's going to hold that to you when you're 8. >> he's tough. she's like oh, your pitch. i'm like she's 3! musician hears, they hear -- he's like i'm not going to -- >> jimmy: he's going to expect the same of his children. >> yeah. and he's teaching her chords and everything. >> jimmy: that's great. >> and very much about the pocket. you know the pocket? >> jimmy: i do know the pocket.

youf e you've got to get into the pocket. >> she's got the terminology now. >> jimmy: it's great to see you. the movie is called "the railway man." nicole kidman. we'll be right back with alyson hannigan.

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i'm taking off, but, uh, don't worry.

i'm gonna leave the tv on for you. and if anything happens, don't forget about the new xfinity my account app. you can troubleshoot technical issues here. if you make an appointment, you can check out the status here. you can pay the bill, too. but don't worry about that right now. okay. how do i look? ♪ thanks. [ male announcer ] troubleshoot, manage appointments, and bill pay from your phone. introducing the xfinity my account app. >> jimmy: you know our next guest as the adorable lesbian witch on "buffy the vampire slayer," the foul-mouthed flutist from "american pie" and, most notably, as lily on "how i met your mother." the series finale airs monday night on cbs. please say hello to

alyson hannigan. >> jimmy: i know you're going to think i'm being flattering, but i heard you had a big birthday yesterday and i cannot believe it. >> i did. i turned 40 yesterday. >> jimmy: this might be the rare and perhaps only time that an actress in hollywood is lying about her age but making herself older. >> i'm trying. >> jimmy: that's pretty crazy. >> but i've been around long enough to sort of prove it. i've done a lot of shows. and my daughter also turned 5 yesterday as well. >> jimmy: oh, wow. >> i wasn't allowed to celebrate. this is the first year she said i don't want to share my birthday. if i was not 40 i would say fine, that's fine.

which i was. but i thought i have to celebrate it a little bit. >> jimmy: what did you do? >> when she was in school my friends dragged me out. i had a lot to do to prepare for her party but i had about a minute per year and we had a really quick breakfast and it was like i have to make a cake and fruit salad. >> jimmy: you had breakfast for your 40th birthday? that's terrible. that's what you do for an 80th birthday. not even that. >> jimmy: people go into lunch on the 80th. >> at least have a mamosa. i have icing on a cake to do. i have a lot of stuff. >> jimmy: so you were working to prepare your daughter's -- >> at school they celebrate. but then she'll also have a birthday party this weekend, which i am -- okay. so when did it change? when i was a kid, i went to birthday parties, i didn't get a present. but now suddenly, like, it's not good enough to just throw them an awesome party you have to

then give the kids that come to your house, you have to give them presents too. they walk away with swag. >> jimmy: for real? like what? >> i get a little crazy, because i go on pinterest and i'm like i can make all that. >> jimmy: how many kids are invited to the party? >> 16. >> jimmy: 16 kids. >> yeah, nobody said no. please don't come to my birthday party. so i'm making all of this crap. i'm sorry. >> jimmy: so now you're making gifts for 16 children. >> yes. and i can't stop myself. because i think everything is cute. so i go on pinterest. it's a mermaid themed party. so i can make a mermaid doll, sure. 16 of them i have to make now. >> jimmy: you're making 16 mermaid dolls. out of what? >> fabric. and yarn for hair. >> jimmy: the worst part is kids

hate homemade gifts. >> yeah. luckily we go to a very granola school so i think they will appreciate it. >> jimmy: oh, one of those. learning schools. >> no, that i ear -- they hate learning. >> jimmy: oh, free range school. >> play. >> jimmy: learning to express themselves. >> yeah. >> jimmy: what else are you making? >> little stuffed animal star fish with beads on them. i don't know why i decided. i'm just making my life so much harder. >> jimmy: you're making your own stuffed animals. >> i had some time off since the show. i'm going to make up for anything i missed. so i made little fairy wands. my husband -- >> jimmy: not really in the mermaid theme but always appreciated. >> starfish hands. don't worry. >> jimmy: what is your husband

doing? >> oh, shoe, i'll help you because it's still technically my birthday, too, even though it was hush-hush. i'm not trying to act like it's hush-hush because people will think i'm ashamed of being 40. no, it's just my kid doesn't want to share. >> jimmy: i'm just ashamed of my child. >> it's just bad parenting, sorry. she doesn't know how to share. >> so he's like i'll help out. we got these treasure boxes that he's staining to look like antique treasure boxes. >> jimmy: wow. >> no, he's so slow. i thought okay, you can do that in a couple of days and then move on to help me with all the other things on pinterest. it's like he's doing maybe in two days. and i think he's using like a toothpick to paint them or something. it's like honey, he's doing a wonderful job. but come on. >> she's going to be six by the time the stuff is all ready.

>> by the time she's 26, he's not going to want a treasure chest. >> you want to make sure they appreciate what they've been given. do you like your treasure box? and what about the wand? you can wave the wand. if things break you're going to have to fix it on the spot. >> the wand are at the end. >> you need to get back to work. >> jimmy: i do. i was going to do crafting tonight but i thought no. >> we could have spread it out with the audience. we could have teamed up and banged it all out. >> well, from now on, if i meet a new person that's going to be my friend, i'm like asking them about their sewing skills. i'm going to test to make sure they -- >> just pull up to the home depot, a whole bunch of guys there that can help you. >> you think so? >> jimmy: give them a couple of beers, no problem. "how i met your mother" nine years of doing this show.

i would imagine this is a very sad thing. >> i killed a lot of trees with my crying. well, not nitly killed the tree but, you know. >> jimmy: who was doing the most crying? >> me. definitely. but i mean, the last table -- we all do love each other s much. and i would say 99% of the room was crying. and that's executives and everything. because we were laughing and crying. it's not a sad show. but it's very -- >> jimmy: but it's sad when everybody is -- and you know you're never going to see any of those people again. >> i know, i know. and i really did my grieving sort of during the last episode because i sort of knew that, you know, that -- we'll see each other as much as -- oh, no, we aren't. > . >> anticipate thered there's a

ending? >> well we wrapped it up the way we wanted to wrap it up. >> jimmy: congratulations. that's a big accomplishment. you could probably have another 19 if you wanted to. maybe even more importantly, i wish you luck with the birthday party this weekend. >> thank you. >> jimmy: alyson hannigan, everybody. next monday, 8:00 on cbs. we'll be right back with jerrod niemann.

>> jimmy: i want to thank alyson hannigan and nicole kidman.

i want to apologize to matt damon. we did run out of time. nightline is next, but first, his album "high noon" came out today. here with the song, "drink to that all night" is jerrod niemann! ♪ ♪ pulling up now and the parking lot's full gonna ride that cow at the dallas bull ♪ ♪ everybody in the at-l is coming deejay's got those speakers thumping ♪ ♪ got a black ford not a white mercedes walking in the front door checking out the ladies ♪ ♪ my buddy says hey boys i'm buyin' hottest girl in here's givin'

me the eye and ♪ ♪ every body knows it's gonna be one of those ♪ ♪ i can drink to that all night that's the stuff i like ♪ ♪ that's the kinda party makes you throw your hands up high ♪ ♪ 'bout to tie one on talkin' gone gone gone turning all the wrongs into right i can drink to that all night ♪ ♪ workin' on a sweet thing sittin' on a bar stool doing shots of jack girl gonna take it old school ♪ ♪ sayin' hell yeah to every song they're playing do you wanna dance baby i'm just sayin' ♪ ♪ everybody knows it's gonna be one of those ♪ ♪ i can drink to that all night that's the stuff i like ♪ ♪ that's the kinda party makes you

throw your hands up high ♪ ♪ 'bout to tie one on talkin' gone gone gone turning all the wrongs into right i can drink to that all night ♪ ♪ i can drink to that all night ♪ ♪ take your cup fill it up you can't raise it high enough ♪ ♪ take your cup fill it up you can't raise it high enough ♪

♪ everybody knows it's gonna be one of those ♪ ♪ i can drink to that all night that's the stuff i like ♪ ♪ that's the kinda party makes you throw your hands up high ♪ ♪ i can drink to that all night that's the stuff i like ♪ ♪ that's the kinda party makes you throw your hands up high ♪ ♪ 'bout to tie one on talkin' gone gone gone turning all the wrongs into right ♪ ♪ i can drink to that all night i can drink to that all night ♪ ♪ i can drink to that all night i can drink to that all night ♪ ♪ take your cup fill it up you can't raise it high enough ♪ ♪ take your cup fill it up you can't raise it high enough ♪ ♪ take your cup fill it up you can't raise it high enough ♪ ♪ take your cup fill it up you can't raise it high enough ♪ ♪

♪ i'm going to pack my bag and i'm going to go away ♪ i'm going to split ♪ i'm going to get it up and i'm never coming back ♪ but before i get to going ♪ i've got to say ♪ now ♪ all you do is treat me cool ♪ ain't going to tell you no more ♪ ♪ going to walk out the door ♪ lover you don't treat me no good no more ♪ lover lover ♪ you don't treat me no good no more ♪ oh it hurts to say ♪ i'm going to pack up my bag ♪ and i'm going to go away ♪ i'm going to split

♪ i can't stand it ♪ i'm going to give it up ♪ ain't never coming back tonight on "nightline," meet the americans dad out to protect their daughters' innocence. we're lifting the veil on a ritual. the charity ball. but can these girls keep a promise not to date or even kiss until they're ready to marry. >> you talk about yourself as your daughter's boyfriend. that's going to have a lot of people uncomfortable. >> plus, they call them the magnificent six. the most highly trained elite flyers in the u.s. navy. they're like nothing you've ever seen in the sky. we're going along for the 800-mile-an-hour ride to find out what it