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tv   Jimmy Kimmel Live  ABC  September 29, 2014 11:35pm-12:38am PDT

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kimmel, actress jennifer love hewitt. for all of us here, we appreciate your time. see you again tomorrow. >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- jennifer love hewitt. from "marvel's agents of shield," clark gregg. and music from clean bandit. with cleto and the cletones. and now, i kid you not, here's jimmy kimmel! ♪ it's "jimmy kimmel live" [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you. hi, everyone. i'm jimmy, i'm the host of the show. thank you for coming. thank you for watching. [ cheers and applause ] that's very nice of you.
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glad you're in a good mood. i really -- i hope you had a good weekend. i certainly didn't. do you have a minute? so, on friday, i cancel all my plans at the last minute to fly to italy for george clooney's wedding, right? all the direct flights are booked, so i wind up connecting in paris. little do i know, the air france pilots are on strike, so my connection is canceled. they get us rescheduled on a flight to venice. we land in venice, we're almost four hours late. when i finally get there, they won't let me into the wedding because i wasn't invited to the wedding. can you imagine that? [ cheers and applause ] so rude. i still had a better weekend than my cousin sal did. see if you can relate to this. they had picture day for my cousin sal's son. he has a flag football team. they scheduled photo day at 7:45 a.m. on saturday. son's 10 years old.
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they had 56 teams show up at once to take pictures. when they got there, they started with the 7-year-olds. one team at a time. then they do all the 8-year-olds. and then the 9-year-olds. and then they got to the 10-year-olds, like 2 1/2 hours later. but they made them show up at 7:45. why do we put up with this kind of thing? what kind of maniacs think this is a good idea? every person in the world has a digital camera. they can take this picture five minutes before any game and it would look just as good. [ applause ] but if you did that, then they wouldn't be able to sell you a pin with your kid's exhausted head on it for $75. so -- 7:45 a.m. it was. and they wonder why we let our kids sit and play video games until they turn into big fat lumps, because, i tell you why, because there's no team photo day. that's why. this is interesting. a youth soccer league in leba n lebanon, ohio, they decided to have a silent soccer weekend.
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parents were not allowed to yell or cheer and coaches were told to keep their instructions to a minimum. the idea was to let the kids just play and have fun and i guess let the parents recover from hangovers or something, but -- this is one of the guys that runs the league explaining why they did this. >> why are you doing this? >> this is our way of giving the game back to the kids. we just want to basically empower them and give them the opportunity to communicate openly with each other and just play the game the way it's supposed to be played, without by interruptions. >> jimmy: well -- fortunately jason hasn't learned to read yet, so -- [ cheers and applause ] that's a weird idea. i don't know, though. if you -- if you don't allow the parents to yell things out, how do you know which parents to hate? [ laughter ] today was another dumb holiday. national coffee today. legend has it that coffee was discovered in the sixth century by an ethiopian goat herder.
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he built a stand out of branches from an olive tree and started charging the goats $6 a cup for them and the rest is history. one of the most expensive coffees in the world is made by -- you probably heard about this. they feed beans to a creature-like cat, so it eats the beans and they travel through its dsystem and when thy come out, the beans have a rich, mellow flavor. the guy that figured that out must really love coffee. [ laughter ] oh, no, the cat ate all the coach f coffee beans. oh, well. at one point or another, most everyone that drinks it has had their name spelled wrong on a coffee cup. you go up, you give your name -- i have a friend named joe, whose name they spell young. not only is his name joe, they call coffee joe, it's the one name you should know how to spell. but there's some very bright people working at coffee shops, too, so, in honor of national
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coffee day, we thought it would be fun to organize a friendly competition tonight. and it is time now for our first and probably last annual "jimmy kimmel live" barista spelling bee. our contestants are here from a variety of coffee shops around our neighborhood. first off, from heath's coffee, welcome ryan. ryan, are you -- >> hi. >> jimmy: are you a good speller in general? >> i'm pretty good. >> jimmy: okay, very good. next up, from coffee bean, which is right next door to us, say hello to caitlin. >> hello. >> jimmy: has anyone ever misspelled your name? >> all the time. >> jimmy: okay, all right. very good. and finally, from tiago, a bit down the street, jaime. that's a hard one, too. some people may say jamie. >> it gets spelled most often.
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>> jimmy: if i had to pick one of you to make me a coffee, i would go with jaime. we'll have three rounds of names. the first names will be relatively simple. the second, we'll introduce more difficult names and the third round will be very difficult. you have to give us the most common spelling of the name i'll read to you, okay? don't get crazy. we're going to start with ryan. ryan, you get to go first. >> all right. >> jimmy: please take the stand. write the name on the cup. the name you'll write on the cup is fiphyllis. >> p-h-y-l-l-i-s. phillip. >> jimmy: very good. have a seat, ryan. caitlin, you are next. one of the common names in the world. michael. >> michael. m-i-c--a-e-l.
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michael. >> jimmy: very good. jaime. this name should be a cinch for you. guillermo. >> guillermo. g-u-i-l-l-e-r-m-o. guillermo. >> jimmy: so far, so good. everyone's through the first round. ryan? >> yep. ready. >> jimmy: get some celebrity names here. the name you have to spell is bjork. >> ah -- b-j-o-r-k. bjork. >> jimmy: that is absolutely correct. have a seat. caitlin. perhaps before your time, but the name we're looking for is liberace. >> l-i-b-e-r-a-c-e.
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>> jimmy: that is absolutely right. very good. j jaime. the name we're looking for is joaquin. >> j-o-a-q-u-i-n. >> jimmy: very good. that's correct. ryan. this is first and last name. and the name is jake gyllenhaal. >> j-a-k-e . >> jimmy: good start. g-y-l-e-n -- >> jimmy: oh, there are two ls in gyllenhaal. i'm sorry. guillermo -- >> let me have your apron. >> jimmy: caitlin. the name we are looking from you, zach galifianakis. >> z-a-c-h.
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>> jimmy: uh-huh. >> g-a-l-a -- >> oh. i'm sorry. it is an i we're looking for. jaime. you can win this if you are able to spell -- do you watch "game of thrones?" >> ah, no. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: well, then we have a problem. spell khaleesi. >> oh, lord. can you repeat that? >> jimmy: khaleesi. >> k-a -- >> oh! well. >> jimmy: we have thouno winnere tonight. all losers. you guys will have to split up the tip jar among yourselves. yes, guillermo, the dunce caps. th thank you to the baristas. this could be a whole show. right? i don't want this anymore. here. [ applause ]
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dennis rodman is still alive. dennis rodman has a new plan to bring american business to north korea and it involves muscular men wearing underpants. >> what's going on? where's kim jong-un? >> you know what, guess what, i'm going back to north korea probably november. >> really? >> yes, i am, november. >> he's been missing for three weeks now. >> you know, we're doing one thing, man. he wants to bring wrestling. wrestling, you know, wwe, whatever. >> yeah, wrestling, yeah. >> yeah, yeah, brother. i'm going to bring it there. >> jimmy: well, good. you know what people in north korea would really love for you to bring them? a sandwich. [ laughter ] someone should tell dennis rodman that north korea is no place to make people believe something that it isn't true. it's nice to see dennis bringing them something that isn't hepatitis. meanwhile -- [ applause ] dennis' very good friend --
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[ laughter ] >> i think i look good. >> jimmy: that is a good look for you. i like that. >> like the monopoly guy. >> jimmy: you need a cane with a brass handle. >> yeah, sure. i'm go tell jaime. >> jimmy: you go tell jaime. >> i will. >> jimmy: anyway, all right. we have a very unusual staff here at the show. not just on camera, behind the scenes. there are some interesting people. one of them is a security named adelina. she has a lot of unusual hobbies. for the last six, seven years, she's been filling out pads of graph paper trying to fill out lottery numbers. so far, she's not been successful. but we decided to liven up her day by hiring another security guard that looks like her and we dressed her like her and we sat her right next to adelina and perhaps it is needless to say that it did not take long before things got weird.
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♪ >> so, the pain thing on this post is access control. >> okay. >> i don't want anyone getting up there that's not authorized. >> absolutely. >> here's your post. call me if you need anything, okay? >> sure, yeah, thank you. appreciate it. [ laughter ] >> hi! >> hi. >> i'm kate. you new here? >> i am. >> kaliko. >> nice to meet you. >> can i get you anything? >> coffee or anything like that? >> yeah, it's right over here. >> thank you so much.
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>> she's going to make you coffee? >> she's going -- oh, there it is. >> cream or sugar? >> i would love some cream. >> okay. >> thank you. >> all the flavors. >> this is amazing. thank you so much. >> yeah. >> thank you. >> yeah. >> hey, thank you. oh, oh. good to see you, too. oh, thank you so much. thank you. >> bitch. >> what's your name? >> kaliko. >> jimmy: jimmy. nice to meet you. you're new here? >> today is my first day. >> jimmy: welcome, welcome. great to have you here. >> thank you so much. >> jimmy: you guys getting along? >> yeah, she's been great. >> jimmy: that's great. great. >> i wlov the show, i watch it all the time. >> jimmy: oh, thank you. >> i actually have a lot of ideas to maybe punch it up a
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little bit. >> jimmy: oh really? >> just make like a little con me with little baby similar bombs and every time you tell a joke, he goes -- so everyone knows funny, it's the -- you tell a joke -- >> jimmy: huh. >> it would be really funny. >> jimmy: what do you think? >> i agree with it but maybe she can get a monkey. >> jimmy: can i tell you something? >> sure. >> jimmy: i love that idea. >> thanks. >> jimmy: thank you. i really appreciate that. do you mind if we use that? if we do the monkey thing? >> i wouldn't mind at all. >> jimmy: that would be great. do you have a camera phone or anything like that? >> yes. >> jimmy: would you mind taking a picture. i want to get a shot, because this is a big deal, you know, you came up with that monkey idea. >> i thought i would throw it in. >> jimmy: get us together. get another one for safety. i want to make sure we got it. >> yeah, i don't -- >> jimmy: yeah.
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>> hey, jimmy, kiss me right there. >> jimmy: threally nice to meet you. >> nice to meet you, too. >> jimmy: see you later. >> super nice. >> he is super nice. >> super nice. thank you for the picture. >> he never took a picture with me. >> oh, my gosh. >> welcome. >> thank you, i appreciate the welcome. everyone's been so nice. >> we feel so much safer that you're here. >> that's really nice. >> look what i found. >> oh, my goodness. oh, my god. this is way better. >> this is from jimmy. wants to thank you for that great idea. >> thank you so much! oh, my gosh. this is beautiful. i guess he really liked the monkey idea. >> they're saying security alert on jimmy. we received, so, i want us to drop these off, okay? >> okay. >> i'll be right back. >> great.
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>> thanks. >> taser and a baton, huh? not my first time. >> hey. where's jimmy? >> ah, he went that way. >> do you have an appointment? >> he knows what i'm doing here. where's kimmel? >> sir, i want you to calm down and sit down. >> i'm going to go find him. ow! hey, you can't -- whoa! >> whoa. you took him down. good job. >> thank you. let me give you a medal. >> oh, my gosh. thank you so much. >> and $10,000. >> what? >> and $10,000. here. good job. >> thank you. [ cheers and applause ] >> what a great job! ♪ for she's a jolly good fellow ♪ ♪ for she's a jolly good fellow ♪ ♪ which nobody can deny
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>> this is really [ bleep ] up. >> jimmy: all right. adelina -- there's adelina. guillermo -- give adelina the hat. there you go. all right. now we're -- thank you, adelina. tonight on the show, we have music from clean bandit. clark gregg is here. and we'll be right back with jennifer love hewitt. [door be♪l rings] [door bell rings] [phone rings]
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♪ ♪
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>> jimmy: hello again. tonight, from "marvel's agents of shield," which airs tuesday nights right here on abc, clark gregg is here. then, from england, this is their latest album -- hey, there's nothing in it! it's -- if there was anything in it, it would be called "new eyes." clean bandit from the at&t
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stage. tomorrow night, the incredible martin short will be with us. dave salmoni is bringing animals. we'll have music from steve aoki. and later this week, tim allen, ellen pompeo, anna gunn, norman reedus from "the walking dead" and music from the madden brothers and disclosure featuring mary j. blige. your presence isn't mandatory -- but it would be appreciated. our first guest tonight is making a bold and unprecedented career shift from erotic masseuse on "the client list" to her new job as fbi agent on "criminal minds." she could arrest herself, technically. you can watch the season premiere wednesday night on cbs, please welcome jennifer love hewitt. [ cheers and applause ] >> hi! >> jimmy: so, a lot has happened to you since the last time you were here. >> to you, as well. congratulations. >> jimmy: you changed jobs. >> i did. >> jimmy: you got married, you had a baby all in that time.
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>> i like to just do it all at once. >> jimmy: you really did do it all at once. how old is your daughter? >> 10 months. >> jimmy: that's very cute. that's a good age. >> really good. she smiles, she's walking. she's waddling like a little penguin. >> jimmy: isn't that early to be walking? >> it is. she's an overachiever, which is awesome. >> jimmy: is it good that she's walking or do you feel like, oh -- >> it's terrifying. >> jimmy: right. >> i'm like this all day trying to move furniture and dodge things. >> jimmy: you have to fill all your outlets with cement. >> oh, yeah, everything, there's gates everywhere, which i constantly trip over. >> jimmy: i have a feeling that more adults are injured by baby gates than babies are saved by baby gates. >> i have bruises like everywhere from falling over them. >> jimmy: they need to make softer gates. >> they really do. or easier to open and then you're holding the baby and it's like, you have to lift up and swing it. >> jimmy: yeah, yeah. well, there's summon money to b
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there. we'll go on "shark tank." >> i like it. >> jimmy: rubber baby gate. you did not know what sex the baby would be, you didn't find out beforehand. we did the same thing. >> it's great that way, isn't it? >> jimmy: i thought it was great. >> people are mean to you. >> jimmy: yeah. people are annoyed by it. >> absolutely. everyone. yes. and you're like, i'm a pregnant lady, you can't be mean to me. then they're like, tell us what your baby is. i don't know. and then they guess, which is insulting for the woman, because they're like, oh, well, you're really carrying in the back side. i have been carrying in the back side since i was 15. this is not pregnancy. that's who i am. >> jimmy: carrying in the back side. >> they're like, oh, or it's really in your boobs. it's been there since i was 15. >> jimmy: yeah, there's a lot of witchcraft and nonsense that goes on. you have to go along with it, it's showing interest. >> it's sweet -- it's not sweet. >> jimmy: it is -- it bothered
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me, i'll tell you why. because there's a 50% chance they're going to be right. >> of course. >> jimmy: so, if i have 50 people, 25 of them say it's going to be a girl, 25 say it's going to be a boy. i have to listen to the 25 go, i told you, i know it. it's not like you guessed it was going to be a puppy and a puppy came out. you knew it was going to be a baby, it was going to be one of two things. >> i just avoided people most of my pregnancy and after. and i was happy. it was fine. >> jimmy: your husband, was he in the delivery room? >> of course, yeah. he should be a male dula, my husband. he was a rock. he was awesome. >> jimmy: do you have male dulas? he was good at it, huh? >> he was. he was very solid. >> jimmy: what made him so good? what did he do? >> he just didn't -- i was really worried that i was going to get, like, like that face, like, oh, this is -- oh, what's happening there. i didn't know what was -- i'm not good as the faces. i would have been, what does that mean?
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>> jimmy: right. >> he was just, like, babe, this is great, i am so proud of you right now, this is awesome, you look beautiful -- like, he said all of the right things. i was really proud of him. >> jimmy: do you think he was acting or he meant it? because i know he's an actor. >> i think there might have been a little fear involved. >> jimmy: he may have memorized the script before he went in. >> he's that guy anyway, so, he's impressive in that way but he was great. >> jimmy: did you see cue cards? >> this is the thing, if you are in labor, feed your husband and they're wonderful. >> jimmy: that is very maternal. you are packing lunches, the kid hasn't come out. >> you need them. if he's passed out, something bad happened out of being hangry, i don't get what i need, which is my rock. i had pudding for him and snack bars. >> jimmy: you brought pudding for him? >> yeah, of course. >> jimmy: my wife did not bring me any pudding. though all the stuff they brought for her i would just eat it. >> right. they do give you -- i loved the juice.
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i would have stayed in the hospital for, like six days just for the juice they give you when you're pregnant. it's delicious. it's like hawaiian punch or something. >> jimmy: babies love hawaiian punch. you've got a new television show, as well. which are you more excited about? [ laughter ] >> that's so not a nice thing. you know what, both. i'm equally as excited. >> jimmy: you are just as excited about your baby -- >> i'm more excited about the baby. but very excited to be on "criminal minds." >> jimmy: your baby's name is autumn. >> and your baby's name is -- >> jimmy: we haven't given her one yet. >> oh. >> jimmy: jane is her name. >> jane's beautiful. >> jimmy: autumn is -- you had the baby in autumn. >> yes. that was not -- she came early. >> jimmy: if she'd come in the winter, would she have been named autumn? you could have confused the kid forever. it sort of worked out that way. it was not planned that we were having a kid in autumn. we just really liked the name. and she came early and she came
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in autumn. >> jimmy: how early? >> 3 1/2 weeks. >> jimmy: oh, she was -- >> i was not planning on it that day. >> jimmy: she took the name very seriously. >> she did. she did. yes. >> jimmy: it's a good thing you didn't name her christmas or something. easter, she'd still be inside you right now. >> i know, i'd be like, this really is going on. yeah. >> jimmy: we're going to take a quick. when we come back, jennifer love hewitt is here. her new show is "criminal minds." we'll be right back. ♪ ♪
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♪ when i peel this sticker off the munchie meal, i have a 1 in 4 chance of winning cool prizes like flights on southwest airlines, skateboards, fandango movie tickets, neff gear, or free food you can eat, like a whole 'nother munchie meal. it's called jack's munchie peel instant win game and it's awesome. check this out. when i peel this banana, i win the inside of this banana. cool story, bro. >> jimmy: we are back with jennifer love hewitt. she is on the show "criminal minds." that's been on for how many seasons now? >> ten seasons. >> jimmy: and you had never seen it before you joined the show, yes? >> i had seen it but it's a very
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scary show. >> jimmy: why do you say that? >> well, i mean, it's just creepy, there's lots of criminals and lots of death and my first day, i had to -- i found a limb on the ground. which is so not what i'm used to. usually i massage limbables and now they are just on the ground. so, it's scary. >> jimmy: hey, is it true that you once sent a bed to matt damon? >> yes, it is. >> jimmy: how did that happen, exactly? >> well -- i'm -- i'm not a normal person. no, i was reading an article -- i must have been 19 or 20 years old. i was reading an article, matt damon and ben affleck had just blown up big time and i knew twho he was and was reading the article and he said this really sad thing in the article about how he, well, like all of his dreams were coming true in the business and he was working really hard but he didn't really feel like those days he had a bed of his own, like, he was just traveling so much and everything. and i remember being really busy also and thinking, that's so
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sad, like, to have all your dreams come true but to not feel like you have a solid foundation. so, for some reason, i thought an aerobed would help him for that. >> jimmy: that's a solid foundation. >> totally solid. i was like, he could travel with it and it is always his bed and always his -- [ laughter ] i didn't go over it with anyone. i didn't -- i should have, hey, like, what do you think? should i send this to matt damon? don't do it, you're crazy. but i didn't, so, i just got the information, he was in paris filming something and now i'm like, he was probably at the savoy, this giant suite and here comes security with this little aerobed. >> jimmy: you sent it to paris? >> i did. and i never got a thank you. >> jimmy: well, you know why you didn't get a thank you? he's a creep. [ laughter ] i mean, he's got no class. i mean, what kind of a person doesn't thank another person for
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sending him a bed? >> i was really sad. it made me sad in my heart. i understand maybe his security never gave it to him. that's a possibility. >> jimmy: probably scared him. wow, that's something. well, shame on you matt damon. he's backstage waiting right now. shame on you. jennifer love hewitt. the season premiere of "criminal minds" airs this wednesday at 9:00 p.m. on cbs. thank you, jennifer. we'll be right back. ye- yes! we have the new iphone. how- cause everyone's coming in for the new iphone. wh-what... kind of service plan can you get? well right now if you select the 15 gig plan we'll double your data and make it 30 gigs for the same price. well that- great! you'll take it. * in head * are you inside my md right now? nope where was... albuquerque who was the porcupine what is my fave- hollandaise sauce no way... the new iphone is here and now you can get 30 gigs of truly shareable data starting at $160 dollars a month.
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therlike a new meticulouslyone's engineered german sedan. finely crafted. exactingly precise. desire for such things often outpaces one's means. until now. hey matt, new jetta? yeah. introducing lots of new. the new volkswagen jetta. isn't it time for german engineering?
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>> jimmy: hi there. still to come, clark gregg and music from clean bandit. this is my friend, celebrity photohound yehya. say hi to everyone, yehya. >> hi, everyone. god bless you. god bless you forever, guys. >> jimmy: and god bless you. >> god bless you. >> jimmy: god bless the band. >> god love guillermo. god bless guillermo. >> jimmy: yes, that's right. all right, so, we're going to preview who we have coming up on the show this week. i will show a picture of the guest, and yehya, you will tell everyone who that is. you have not seen these photographs? sometimes i don't know the name. >> jimmy: that's why it's funny. who is that man? >> that's the guy, he is actor,
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he make movie with the dog, one dog, big dog long time? >> jimmy: yeah, that's true. >> don't make it easy for me, put the name, jimmy. >> jimmy: that is tim allen. all right. next up -- >> yeah. >> jimmy: who is that guy? >> alan something? i don't know. >> jimmy: no, martin short. >> martin short. yeah. >> jimmy: okay. do you know this woman? >> yeah, she look beautiful. i don't know. >> jimmy: she's on the show "grey's anatomy." >> the guy, what's his name, patrick dempdempsey. >> jimmy: that's not him. that's ellen pompeo. >> oh. she look like english woman. >> jimmy: she is not english. she's american. did you see the show "breaking bad." >> yeah. >> jimmy: she was on that show. >> with the bald guy. >> jimmy: that's right. that's anna gunn. she will be here. and -- finally -- that's it, finally. all right.
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>> that's jimmy, guys. >> jimmy: god bless you, yehya. we'll be right back with clark gregg. applebee's let the fans put their favorite dishes on the famous 2 for $20 menu. why did i vote for the quesadilla burger to go on applebee's 2 for $20 menu? because i believe in the power of uniting bubbly, melty cheese and crispy tortillas. it's a burger inside the quesadilla. whaaat? it's spicy! it has a kick to it. something about that pico de gallo. and it's my favorite. can we eat now? absolutely! yeah! yes! come in now for fan favorites. or, they'll be ready for pick-up when you order online.
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mmm! ring ring! progresso! i forgive you. you do?
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it's ok that your soup tastes like my homemade. it's our slow simmered vegetables and tender white meat chicken. apology accepted. i'm watching you soup people. make it progresso or make it yourself.
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>> jimmy: hi there. still to come, music from clean bandit. our next guest is as close to being a superhero as you can get without having to wear a costume. he plays director phil coulson on "marvel's agents of shield." you can watch it tuesday nights at 9:00 right here on abc. please say hello to clark gregg. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: i feel like an inventor when you come out. you were just at one of the comic cons -- which one -- >> san antonio, it's called alamo-con. >> jimmy: is it really? what does the alamo have to do with comic books? >> i don't know, man. i was there and i still don't know. >> jimmy: was the whole cast there? other celebrities at this thing? >> um -- perhaps. no other cast members were there. i was there to see some -- it's
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fun for me. >> jimmy: is it? >> it is quite a bit, because agent phil cowlsulson, now director -- >> jimmy: congratulation, by the way. >> he's a bit of a nerd. he had a crush on captain america. when he died, the nerds brought him back to life, so, the nerds are my people, as a nerd, they have a real connection. so, when i go there, it's really fun. >> jimmy: they must go nuts when you are there. >> dressed like me. and everybody should get to be me. >> jimmy: how do they know that -- they're dressed like you. you wear a suit and glasses. >> look. if you're low on money, you don't have the money for the giant, you know, time lord costume, go as phil coulson. >> jimmy: do kids dress up like your character for halloween? >> they do. >> jimmy: have you run into them? >> not many of them, jimmy, no. it's not a costume that gets a lot of thumbs up on -- kid,
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you're in a suit. but i was -- i took my daughter trick or treating not long ago and we were outside of a house waiting for our shot at the candy and these three boys came out as three of the avengers. i kind of stepped in your way, i said, what did you get? they kind of went, oh, my god, oh, my god. i took their candy. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: well, you got to get something out of it. they got the memories. you got a mounds. >> that's right. >> jimmy: you're good at assembling teams. that seems to be your specialty. i would like to see you assemble like a bowling team or something less spectacular. do you assemble teams in real life? >> i'm do that for you. do you have a bowling team? are you having trouble with attendance? >> jimmy: i would like to get one assembled. >> okay. >> jimmy: one of the weird things about the show is that the plot of the television show is affected by the movies, by the marvel movies, so, shield
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gets destroyed and -- >> you noticed that? >> jimmy: you're at home going, hey, wait a minute, i work for shield and now it's destroyed, right? >> we got a call saying, okay. we've been talking about some mysterious organizations that even you have never heard of. and there's a reason for that, you should go to this screening, in fact, you must go to this screening. the whole cast went out to disney and took us into a room and there we saw super secret screening of "captain america: the winter soldier" and, spoiler alert, shield is annihilated. we walked out with our mouths open. we're going to rename the show? what are you going to do? but it became this incredible thing where the next day we went to work and they pulled us into a trailer, they said, the end of the show you just read is not correct. here are some new top secret red pages and everyone read these pages and halfway through realized that one of our core members was an evil bastard from
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hydra and everyone just kind of turned and looked at him and -- got away from him. poor grant ward. >> jimmy: he must have been thrilled. >> no one talks to him. >> jimmy: yeah. do they not trust you? at a certain point, do you think that they'll just -- >> how many films would it take -- they don't trust me at all. >> jimmy: except for guardians of the galaxy, you've been in, like, all the recent movies. >> i'm glad that it feels that way to you. >> jimmy: i guess -- >> spider-man -- >> i missed a couple while i was dead. >> jimmy: you had a good excuse. >> they managed to be successful anyway, but i was not in captain america or, i don't know, they did another thor movie without me. i thought it was ill-advised. >> jimmy: now that you're director, you replaced nick fury, who was the director. >> yeah. suddenly the director of shield got less cool. i don't have the eye patch or the leather coat. i'm just -- hi, there.
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>> jimmy: it might not be a terrible idea to start wearing an eye patch, maybeover our glayour glasses. >> and change my language a little? >> jimmy: it couldn't hurt, you know. growing up, what was your favorite show? i know a lot of kids love shield and i actual love the show, too. i haven't gotten over the marvel comics era, i was supposed to hang up at age 11. what was your favorite show growing up? >> that's a really good question. >> jimmy: thank you. laugh alrea [ laughter ] >> i'm honored to be getting your best stuff. i saw h.r. puffen stuff and this co oh cooky, weird shows, they were smoking a lot of weed in the '70s. >> jimmy: even that name was clearly a reference to drugs. >> you know that was for us.
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>> jimmy: and freddy had that little flute which seemed like drug parathen nail ya, too. you remember that? >> you're totally right. >> jimmy: no drugs on shield. >> i can't talk about it. >> jimmy: when you are at comic con conventions, do you people ask you for straung things, take weird pictures with them? >> occasionally they want something signed that many people would not deem appropriate. there was a woman -- [ laughter ] what time is this on? there was a woman that didn't have a piece of paper and she was in another thing that you see at comic cons is people in the outfits of their favorite characters. i don't know what character this woman was dressed as, but it was a woman who wore spandex and she was -- she was a healthy person. and she -- [ laughter ] she said, will you sign these? and at comic con, there's kids around. >> jimmy: right. >> i said, yes, absolutely. [ laughter ]
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[ cheers and applause ] because -- you never want to disappoint a fan. >> jimmy: you really don't. it would be rude. >> my journal entries in there. hold on, hold on, just one more little note. >> jimmy: again, you are saying this is because she did not have paper. it's unbelievable. really. >> i had some people take her paper. >> jimmy: i see, i got you. >> just in case. >> jimmy: it's very good to see you. the show is great so far. >> thank you. >> jimmy: it's on tomorrow night. "marvel's agents of shield" airs tuesday nights at 9:00 here on abc. we'll be right back with music from clean bandit.
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when i peel this sticker off the munchie meal, check it out. i have a 1 in 4 chance of winning cool prizes like flights on southwest airlines, skateboards, fandango movie tickets, neff gear, or free food you can eat, like a whole 'nother munchie meal. it's called jack's munchie peel instant win game and it's awesome. check this out. when i peel this banana, i win the inside of this banana. cool story, bro.
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>> jimmy: i'd like to thank jennifer love hewitt, clark gregg, and apologize to matt damon, we ran out of time for him. "nightline" is next, but first, their album is called, "new eyes." here with the song "rather be,"
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with some help from jess glenn, clean bandit. ♪ ♪ oh oh oh ♪ were a thousand miles from comfort we have traveled land and sea ♪ ♪ but as long as you are with me there's no place i'd rather be ♪ ♪ i would wait forever exalted in the scene as long as i am with you ♪ ♪ my heart continues to beat ♪ ♪ with every step we take kyoto to the bay ♪ ♪ strolling so casually ♪ ♪ we're different
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and the same get you another name ♪ ♪ switch up the batteries ♪ if you gave me a chance i would take it ♪ ♪ it's a shot in the dark but i'll make it ♪ ♪ know with all of your heart you can't shake me ♪ ♪ when i am with you theres no place i'd rather be ♪ ♪ i meanno no no no place i'd rather be ♪ ♪ i meanno no no no place i'd rather be ♪ ♪ i meanno no no no place i'd rather be ♪ ♪ we staked out on a mission to find our inner peace ♪ ♪ make it everlasting so nothing's incomplete ♪ ♪ it's easy being with you sacred simplicity ♪
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♪ as long as we're together there's no place i'd rather be ♪ ♪ with every step we take kyoto to the bay ♪ ♪ strolling so casually ♪ ♪ we're different and the same get you another name ♪ ♪ switch up the batteries ♪ if you gave me a chance i would take it ♪ ♪ it's a shot in the dark but i'll make it ♪ ♪ know with all of your heart you cant shake me ♪ ♪ when i am with you there's no place i'd rather be ♪ ♪ i meanno no no no place i'd rather be ♪ ♪ i meanno no no no place i'd rather be ♪ ♪ i meanno no no no place i'd rather be ♪ ♪ when i am with you ♪ there's no place i'd rather be ♪ ♪ no no no ♪ no place i'd rather be
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♪ no no no ♪ no place i'd rather be ♪ no no no ♪ no place i'd rather be ♪ when i am with you ♪ there's no place i'd rather be ♪ thank you.
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tonight on "nightline" -- the incredible power. the majestic fury. unleashed. we venture into the most explosive place on the planet. >> when you're this close, you not only hear that boom, but you feel it. >> with a team of thrill seekers, and one unlikely adventurer. >> what can go wrong? >> willing to go to hell and back. >> five meters. two meters. oh, my god. >> in pursuit of the ultimate shot. the stakes are high. >> you could die. >> as we face off with one angry volcano. a special edition of "nightline," inside the ring of fire, starts in just seconds.

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