it is incredible. it never gets old. >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- andy samberg. from "the view", rosie perez. our half and half halloween pageant. and music from the flaming lips and fwends. with cleto and the cletones. and now, here's jimmy kimmel! ♪ [ cheers and applause ]

>> jimmy: hi, everyone. whoa. hi, there. happy halloween. i am mr. potato head. my friends call me head. that's very nice. thank you for coming. i said i wanted to be a pothead, and autocorrect changed it to potato. everyone on the show is dressed up as children's toys. or, i should say, we are, or you have recently taken peyote. our band leader, cleto, is hello kitty. he's going to wear that costume home so his daughter can see it.

and his wife, too, you know. and care bear. and jeff is a lego man. >> yeah, a lego guy. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that looks great. takeshi, a sock puppet. and then there's strawberry shortca shortcake. and jonathan is a koosh ball. and finally, our announcer, d k dicdic dicky barrett. tell everyone who you're dressed as. >> jimmy, i'm bobby. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: you look great. >> thank you.

>> jimmy: someone broke your plastic. we offered to have him be -- guillermo, do you know who you are? >> guillermo: a troll doll. >> jimmy: you're either a troll doll or a terrible-looking don king. did you ever play with a troll doll? >> guillermo: no. >> jimmy: you have an outie. it's adorabldorable. we spent our whole budget, and on monday, we'll be naked. and this is from "good day philadelphia" this morning. a local chief of police showed up wearing a spongebob costume.

>> you're doing a segment today, chief spongebob? what are you going to be talking about? >> the incident in new york where a lunatic hit someone with a hatchet. >> jimmy: someone finally figured out how to make a hatchet attack festive. and one of our writers, a little boy dressed like a pumpkin, he says trick or treat, at 8:00 a.m.! what are you supposed to give him? make him an omelet? well, she went back to the door,

and there was another woman with three kids trick or treating. is this a thing now? now the early bird gets the gummy worm, too? and in my house, we're keeping trick or treating exactly where it is. if you came to my house at 8:00 in the morning, i would turn a hose on you. [ applause ] >> jimmy: thank you. and it's easy to forget the true meaning of halloween. fortunately, on the "700 pat robertson reminded us. >> tonight is halloween. millions of children and adults will be dressing up as witches and goblins.

this is a night where people worship satan. >> jimmy: i chose to worship satan as mr. potato head. and this is our annual half and half costume pageant. i started this because i got my costume the day of halloween and it was all there was left. here are some favorites from last year. >> miley cyclops. >> jimmy: look at this. tell us what you are dressed as. >> my lil wayne. >> jimmy: and you? >> 50 shades of gray poupon.

>> jimmy: so, later on, this is our best one yet. stay up to watch that. and our other beloved halloween tradition brings the trick back to treat. every year, we ask parents to pretend to eat their children's candy and tell them. this is our favorite. >> i ate all the candy. you have no more candy left. >> what? >> she ate it. >> what the heck? >> mom! >> don't you think you ate enough last night? >> i only had one bite of candy. are you serious? you ate the rest? >> you're probably going to get

a belly ache. [ laughter ] >> why did you eat so much candy so candy? >> mom, that's two. >> two what? >> two plus two equals five. >> a.j., you were so close. >> did you see how much i had? i went to a lot of houses. >> i know. i ate it all. it tasted so good. especially the peanut butter cups. >> you sneaky mom! >> jimmy: that happened in 2011. we thought it would be fun to check in with them now. joining us now, please welcome c.j. and jake. hello, guys. what do you think of my costume.

do you know who i am? look at you guys. do you remember me? >> yes. >> jimmy: what are you guys dressed up as? >> teenage mutant ninja turtles. >> jimmy: did you have pizza tonight? >> no. >> jimmy: did you get lots of candy? >> yes. >> jimmy: what did you get? did you get any reese's peanut butter cups? >> like ten of them. >> jimmy: i hope you have a -- you have pretzels for halloween? what kind of a maniac gives out pretzels? are you worried that your parents are going to eat all the candy?

>> yes. >> jimmy: are you going to hide them somewhere? >> i'm going to take out the pillow and put it in there. >> jimmy: then if anyone wants to touch it, you'll know. you're older and wiser now. >> yeah, i guess so. >> jimmy: do you think the trick your mom pulled on you is funny? >> yeah. it was funny. >> especially the part when i yelled at mom. >> jimmy: yeah. >> you sneaky mom. >> jimmy: do you think you will do the same thing to your kids when you have them? >> yeah. >> jimmy: will you, jake? you will. what's two plus two, by the way? >> four. >> jimmy: all right. wow. [ cheers and applause ] are you guys going to sleep in

your costumes tonight? >> probably not. i'm going to get really itchy. >> look at my tongue. >> jimmy: it's very, very red. you're going to have even fewer teeth tomorrow. i'm glad we got a chance to catch up. have a great rest of your halloween, okay? [ cheers and applause ] still cute. eventually, they'll get to an age where they come here and kick my ass. but it's our fourth annual halloween youtube challenge. tell your kids that you ate all the candy, and do it as soon as possible. we always have a lot of videos to go through. upload it, and next week, we'll

put the best videos on the hey, jimmy kimmel, i ate all my kids' candy. it's an american tradition. and daylight savings ends this weekend. don't forget to change your clocks in your house on sunday, and the one in your car, sometime in the next six to abo eight weeks. i don't know why they haven't outfitted every clock with a device that sets the clock automatically. very few alarm clocks have it. i never reset the clock on my microwave. it's a nuisance. in six months, it will be back.

but here in l.a., there's a company that you can hire to do it for you. >> daylight savings time is great. but turning your clock back is a drag. going from room to room, fiddling with knobs and buttons. just leave your key under the mat, and at 2:00 a.m. on daylight savings night, we come in and scour your house. you can sleep well knowing that we're discreet. we specialize in all clocks. even flava flav clocks are no match for us. don't trust the other services to handle your delicate time

pieces. trust clock scientists. and our halloween special. we'll show up in costume. it ain't clock et science. call today. >> jimmy: tonight on the show, music from the flaming lips. andy samberg, rosie perez. "this week in unneccessary censorship." we'll be right back with our ninth annual half and half costume pageant. stick around. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ye- yes! we have the new iphone. how- cause everyone's coming in for the new iphone. wh-what... kind of service plan can you get? well right now if you select the 15 gig plan we'll double your data and make it 30 gigs for the same price.

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♪ i ♪ know i can't deny... ♪ that i got a new feeling ♪ deep inside... ♪ [ female announcer ] with five perfectly sweetened whole grains... you can't help but see the good. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: welcome back to our special halloween spook-tickler. andy samberg, rosie perez and music from the flaming lips with grace potter are coming up. but first, it's time for a beloved annual halloween tradition here at the show. ever every year, we take half of

one costume and half of another and weave it together. i'm going to ask you to guess what the costume is. are we good? i can be heard here? perfect. time for our ninth annual half and half halloween costume contest. [ cheers and applause ] i think i hear the doorbell ringing now. there it is. all right. let's see what -- oh. well, that is a -- now, don't everyone yell it at once. rotate, show us the whole costume. very good. [ applause ] it's a half and half costume. if it was c3po and oprah, it

would be c3poprah. what is it? >> a unicorn. >> jimmy: what else? >> corn on the cob? >> jimmy: a unicorn on the cob. right. and here we go. this should be as easy as cherry pie, shouldn't it? do you know what this is? >> gorge >> jimmy: what are you? >> george washington machine.

>> jimmy: oh, look at this. okay. would you mind spinning around so we can evaluate you? okay. you here with the purple hair. who is this. do you know? >> whiteout? >> jimmy: this isn't going as well as i anticipated. do you know what this costume is? >> no. >> jimmy: what are you saying? >> walter whiteout. >> jimmy: exactly correct. thank you, visitors from another land. walter whiteout. thank you. okay, now this one is going -- this is not easy. you get kind of the idea. the gentleman has coffees with him. and a clipboard. you know? come up here, i'm trapped in a

giant potato costume. >> is it the green intern? >> jimmy: wow! i didn't think anybody would get that. okay. oh. can you hear that voice? that should give us a clue. okay. all right. does anybody know? you guys are too far away. how about you? you have to get closer to the microphone. what are you dressed as, a caesar salad? >> snow-bacca? >> jimmy: it's tissue-bacca.

[ applause ] yes, please step aside. who have we here? all right, well, i'm going to give you one hint. we're talking about pay cable here. it's a character on two very popular television shows. one for children, one not for children. does anybody have a clue as to who this is. do you know? >> hodora? >> jimmy: hodora the explorer. that's exactly right. now, i believe this is our final costume. look at that. oh! look at that little scamp. now, that's a beloved children's character. wait, what is going on? a violent streak.

does anybody know? >> tickle me pharrell? >> jimmy: no. >> elmo fudd? >> jimmy: no. >> pharrellmo. >> jimmy: that's exactly right. thanks to everyone in our wardrobe department. rosie perez is here. music from the flaming lips. we'll be right back with andy samberg. so stick around! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ the beam family has a long history of doing things their own way. in fact, they age every drop of jim beam twice as long as the law requires for a true kentucky straight bourbon.

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>> jimmy: isn't he adorable. hello, everyone. tonight, she is one of two rosies who are co-hosting "the view" right now. rosie perez is here. in costume. then, a very talented band. they have a new beatles cover album called "with a little help from my fwends." with a "w". the flaming lips and fwends from the at&t outdoor stage. [ applause ] grace potter will be joining them. by the way, i can do almost anything. i can show any mood i want. angry, sad. really, all i can be is happy or sad. but i have magnets all over my body. and i've never been happy. how are you? >> guillermo: i'm hot. >> jimmy: will you wear that to

make love to your wife. >> guillermo: no, never. >> jimmy: never. that would never happen. what, making love to your wife? >> guillermo: no, the costume. >> jimmy: okay, because i think that little hole comes out. >> guillermo: no, it doesn't. >> jimmy: it does if you concentrate hard enough. well, our first guest, with a very funny show, "brooklyn nine-nine." please say hello to andy samberg. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] [ playing "tron" theme

>> jimmy: you look great. welcome, tron. that was impressive. >> flynn doesn't mess around. >> jimmy: that changes the tron costume around. >> it's fair to say that throwing disks is a tron-tact sport. >> jimmy: were you a tron fan when you were a kid? >> it was big in my house when i was going up. >> jimmy: really? seems like you were too young for that movie. >> i'm 73. >> jimmy: what was your best costume when you were a kid?

>> my mom made me an ewok costume. my mom plopped some fake fur on my head and painted my nose brown. >> jimmy: and you were an ewok. and the ewoks are looked down upon by star wars fans. >> well, at the time, i was, oh, 53. >> jimmy: you grew up in berkeley, california. did you get a lot of raisins? >> a lot of raisins, and carob clusters. you have to hit the farmer's market before you go out to pull

pranks. >> jimmy: did you pull pranks when you were a kid? >> well, there was a house with a bucket that said, please take one. we were like, we're talking all. but i don't think -- >> jimmy: who were the other criminals in your gang? >> me and my buddies. like, nathan and john. you guys remember them? >> jimmy: what were their last names? >> nathan parsley. he's a good dude. you did it! [ applause ] but yeah, i morally took issue with it. if you expect me to abide by just take one, it's like, we don't want to touch the kids, but we want to participate in halloween.

>> jimmy: you really taught them a lesson. your on moral high ground there. what's the best candy to get or steal? >> i've always been kind of a junior mints dude. >> jimmy: that's what my dad eats at the movies. >> i couldn't have picked a worse one. >> jimmy: you must be 73 years old. >> i like that sardine candy. >> jimmy: you are, "brooklyn nine-nine," it's going very well for you. >> yeah. >> jimmy: seems like you guys have fun on the show to me. >> we do. >> jimmy: is it fake fun or real fun? >> it's the real deal. every now and then, it's the 13th hour of a day, and we're like, let's get it. but yeah, we have a good group.

>> jimmy: andre braugher is on the show. he gave you this? >> a giant, framed version of this photo. andre, within a few weeks of starting the show. he brought this into my office, framed, and said, this is us. >> jimmy: wait a minute. elton john and barry white. killing it. >> and i assume, i'm elton john? >> jimmy: looks like barry's mom made him a costume out of fake fur. so, you may be barry white. you guys look adorable. are you going to go out trick or treating now? >> yes, now. >> jimmy: andy samberg, everybody. watch his show, sundays, 8:30 p.m. on fox. we'll be right back. [ cheers and applause ] ♪

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[ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: we're back. rosie perez. and music from, let me put on my reading glasses.

the flaming lips and grace potter. time for our weekly tribute to the fcc, it's "this week in unneccessary censorship." where we bleep things whether they need it or not. >> well, the players are [ bleep ] up. >> glad i came to the park today. >> go put the ring on your boy's [ bleep ]. >> guess who just tweeted a picture of her [ bleep ]. >> one guess. >> what do you mean? [ bleep ] it just has to be black. >> hey! you're a [ bleep ] pumpkin. >> that's right. i'm a [ bleep ] pumpkin. >> you don't know how many times she done rammed them two

[ bleep ] down my throat. >> i'm scared of getting [ bleep ]. >> who would [ bleep ] and for what? >> oh, so many people would [ bleep ] me. >> hunting season is about a month in. >> we're sending you into the weekend with [ bleep ] [ bleep ] [ bleep ]. >> so delicious, you'll never look at a [ bleep ] the same way again. >> jimmy: we'll be right back with rosie perez. deliciously crisp and flavorful, brewed with mosaictm and willamette american hops and using centuries old guinness brewing artistry and traditions. the first addition in the new guinness discovery series.

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[ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: still to come, music from the flaming lips. our next guest boxed her way into our hearts in the opening credits of "do the right thing." and 25 years later, those fighting skills are coming in handy. she is the new co-host of "the view." please say hello to rosie perez. [ applause ] ♪

>> jimmy: you look adorable. how are you? >> good. >> jimmy: good luck trying to sit in that thing. it reminds me of willie wonka. >> i can't stand halloween. >> jimmy: oh, you hate it? >> right, i was so poor, we could only afford a bed sheet with two holes in it. we would only get one snicker. i was over it. >> jimmy: not even snickers. snicker, you got. that's very sad. you haven't gotten over it? did you dress up as an adult. are you okay? are you all right? >> i'm okay.

>> jimmy: i feel like we're sumo wrestlers or something. >> oh, my face is smushed. looks like i'm grabbing my breasts, but -- >> jimmy: that's pumpkin here. is this your first time as a pumpkin? >> well, when i was younger, i was over halloween. then in college, my friends were like, let's go be cute and get boys. they dressed me as a whore, right? i hated it, said i'd never do halloween again. 15 years later, my friend -- we called him cucumber slice. he was like, we're going to be at apt, i was like, i never do

it. i don't want to look like a whore. he said, what about a pumpkin. i was driving over the brooklyn bridge like this. i get to the club. i walk in, nobody is dressed up. not a soul. i'm the only one. i'm going through the club like this. excuse me, pardon me. and i almost got in a fight. why did i get up? >> jimmy: it was a mistake. how did you get up is a better question. >> so, you know, i was like, i want to go home, and my friend everett johnson, he was like, we still need to go to mariah carey's party.

and i said, no way. and my girlfriend rhonda said, everyone is waiting for you. i said i'm not going. she said, don't worry, mariah is dressed like an animal. i get there, she's dressed like a playboy bunny. everyone is dressed like a whore. i try to go to the bathroom and cry, but i can't fit through the door. it was a horrible night. i never dressed up again until "the view." and here. you look ridiculous, by the way. >> jimmy: how are things going on "the view"? >> they're fantastic. me and the ladies are cool. but it's a weird gig.

i have to get up so early in the morning. >> jimmy: it's like 9 a.m. >> i have to get up at 5:30 a.m. to get in the car by 6:30 a.m. and then i don't get there because of the traffic on the fdr. i'm there at 7:30 a.m., and i have to get into hair and makeup. and the hot topics and the girls are debating which hot topic they want to pick. they're like, what about you? i'm like, i'm just here. pick whatever you want. 11:00 a.m., it's showtime. it's hard. i used to think you had an easy job. but it's hard. >> jimmy: you have to dress foolifool i ishly, get hair and makeup. ignore the topics when you get on. >> but it's cool, i got to meet

anyy lennox. she's just so nice. >> jimmy: i see. >> and i love her new thing, shake it off. i like that. >> jimmy: and you're going to be doing a broadway play with larry david. >> yes. he really is strange. he's weird. and you know, he -- [ laughter ] excuse me. but when i -- the first time i met him, i was at this function for hbo. celebrating, whatever, one of their great tv series. and he's there. my nephew, he says there he is. he says, let's go say hi. i say no, he's probably weird. i go over, he says, hello, mr.

david. he says, rosie. okay, we're done. and this actress, she rudely steps in front of me. goes up to him, says, larry, how you doing? good to see you. gives him a kiss. he goes, okay, we're done. she says, i love you. she walks away. he says, who the [ bleep ] is that? >> jimmy: what's the name of the play? >> this is just so phallic looking. i look like an idiot. >> jimmy: thank you for coming out. happy halloween for you. rosie perez, watch her on "the view" every morning on abc.

we'll be right back with the flaming lips. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] hey john,whoa!k it out. yeah, i was testing to see if we really can turn any device in your house into a tv. and the tablet worked just fine. but i wanted to see if the phone would work as well. so i shrunk sharon. every channel is live

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>> dicky: the jimmy kimmel live concert series is presented by at&t. mobilizing your world. >> jimmy: i'd like to thank andy samberg, rosie perez and apologize to matt damon, we ran out of time for him. it was a shame. he was all dressed up. i'm sorry. but first, the album is called "with a little help from my fwends", playing the title track with help from their friends morgan delt and grace potter -- these are the flaming lips. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ what would you think if i sang out of tune would you stand up and walk out on me ♪

♪ lend me your ears and i'll sing you a song and i'll try not to sing out of key ♪ ♪ oh i get by with a little help from my friends ♪ ♪ i get high with a little help from my friends ♪ ♪ going to try with a little help from my friends ♪ ♪ ♪ what do i do when my love is away does it worry you to be alone ♪ ♪ how do i feel at the end of the day are you sad because you're on your own ♪ ♪ no, i get by with a little help from my friends ♪

♪ yeah i get high with a little help from my friends ♪ ♪ going to try with a little help from my friends ♪ ♪ do you need anybody i just need someone to love could it be anybody i want somebody to love ♪ ♪ would you believe in a love at first sight yes i'm certain that it happens all the time ♪ ♪ what do you see when you turn out the light i can't tell you but i know it's mine ♪ ♪ oh, i get by with a little help from my friends ♪ ♪ yeah i get high with a little help

from my friends ♪ ♪ oh, i'm going to try with a little help from my friends ♪ ♪ do you need anybody i just need someone to love could it be anybody i want somebody to love ♪ ♪ oh i get by with a little help from my friends ♪ ♪ yeah i get high with a little help from my friends ♪ ♪ yes i get by with a little help from my friends ♪ ♪ with a little help from my friends ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ]

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