>> that's all for now >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live!" tonight -- jennifer aniston. ken jeong. a celebrity curse-off. and guillermo at the american music awards. with cleto and the cletones. and now, and further more, here's jimmy kimmel! ♪ it's "jimmy kimmel live" [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hi there, welcome.

i'm jimmy, i'm the host. thanks for watching. thanks for coming. so glad you could be here short notice. well, that very nice. i'm glad you're excited. we have an exceptional show for you tonight. jennifer aniston is here tonight. which is the reason why there's a rainbow over our building right now. a rare nighttime rainbow. jennifer is here to encourage us to see her new movie "horrible bosses 2" and she has a new book "please stop asking me about the rachel." tonight, jennifer has graciously agreed to partake in -- only our second time doing this, the celebrity curse-off. this is where celebrities stand face to face and say terrible words to each other until one of them is left standing. the first time we did this, julia roberts went up against sally field and, well, here's how that went. you have five seconds, begin. >> all right.

oh, okay. [ bleep ]. >> jimmy: all right. now we go to sally. >> okay. [ bleep ]. >> jimmy: julia? >> [ bleep ]. >> jimmy: sally? >> [ bleep ]. >> jimmy: i was shocked, too. it's sally field. came up with some words i have never heard before. tonight, jennifer aniston will take on a mystery opponent. i will not tell you who that opponent is. all i'll say is, she's very famous -- she's female, by saying she. i ruined it, already. you don't know who it is, but i know who it is and it's -- this is a very good night to be here in the studio audience. and a very bad night to be the person who has to bleep everything that goes on the air. thursday, as i presume you know, is thanksgiving. the day on which we get together with our families to give thanks, mosthat we don't live with them anymore. [ laughter ] you know, the cost of thanks --

the average cost of a thanksgiving dinner went up this year. thanksgiving dinner for ten will cost 37 cents more than it did last year. the average price for a ten-person thanksgiving dinner is now $49.41. that has to be for thanksgiving dinner at kfc, right? [ laughter ] how is that -- my turkey by itself cost like 80 bucks. where are these people having dinner, in prison? [ laughter ] $49.41. i spent that much money on mini marshmallows alone. i don't know how they sell these turkeys so cheap. this is a video we found on youtube. it's video of a male turkey trying to court a female turkey. you know they say turkeys are the dumbest animals on the farm? they actually are. [ laughter ]

[ laughter ] >> jimmy: swept her right off her feet. that's what i would do in high school. i just go around in a circle. it didn't work for me, either. [ laughter ] amazon is very busy doing battle with black friday. amazon started their black friday deals a week early, a week ahead of the regular black friday this year. the deals started last friday, a few days ago and they've been posting new sales every ten minutes since then. amazon's black friday sales are like the regular black friday sales, but instead of getting trampled, you do not. i hate the idea that people are camping out in line on thanksgiving day and i hate that people have to work, because people are camping outside. i think that if you want to spend the night sleeping on a

sidewalk for black friday, you should have to give your house to a homeless person while you're there. [ cheers and applause ] right? that seems fair to me. in colorado, because recreati recreationrecreatio recreationrecreatio recreationrecreatio recreational marijuana is legal, people are marketing to shoppers, encounselling them to buy pot. in the story of christmas itself, the original story, one of the three wisemen, you may remember, brought baby jesus mirhh, which is short for marijuana back then. it's true. it's in the bible. so, now they are making all sorts of holiday themed edibles. be careful not to leave pot brownies out for santa claus. you might find him in the morning passed out on your floor with an xbox controller in his hand. on capital hill, republicans in the house have a holiday gift for president obama. a brand new lawsuit. they are suing the president for

delaying implementation of some parts of obama care. in other words, they're suing the president for not acting fast enough to enact a law that they didn't want enacted in the first place. [ laughter ] kind of makes you nostalgic for when we were just claiming he was born in kenya, doesn't it? [ laughter ] they wanted to file this lawsuit back in july, but and this is true, they couldn't find a lawyer to take the care. in washington, d.c., they couldn't find a lawyer. [ laughter ] that's when you know you might not have a sound legal foundation. but speaker of the house john boehner said he's very serious about the lawsuit. he's been walking around in a neck brace. why, i have no idea. if it goes forward, the case could wind up at the supreme court. and if they don't win there, republicans are threatening to give the president some very negative reviews on yelp. and nobody -- [ laughter ] wants that. but you know what? obama didn't take this job to make friends. he took the job to find the secret compartment in the oval office desk that has the map to

the treasure at the lost city of atlant atlantis. i have to stopwatching nicolas cage movies. meanwhile, congratulations are in order for vladimir putin, who just reportedly earned an eighth degree black belt in karate. you can see here, he dominated the 7 to 9-year-old age bracket. go through these. there he is -- kids didn't know what hit them. that is soviet aggression. why don't i believe putin is an eighth degree black belt? i would like to see him fight an actual eighth degree black belt and see how it goes. i'd pay a lot of money for that. putin is now two levels shy of the highest rank in all of karate. he is also a master of judo and taiwan diquaquae tie.

[ laughter ] right, grar muillermo? >> right, jimmy. >> jimmy: thank you. you're from russia, right? >> no, from mexico. >> jimmy: oh, mexico. i often get the two confused. [ laughter ] last night here on abc, the american music awards, it was a star-studded affair as it always is. kay till pty perry, one directi azal azalea. taylor swift won. beyonce won favorite female artist. at the end of the night, they went, okay, who here is famous and doesn't have an award yet? and they gave one to each of those people, too. like all great award spokes, the amas last night ended with jennifer lopez singing a four-minute song about her butt. [ laughter ] there are a lot of great performances on the show last night. all the big names in music were there. but none of those names stood shorter than our own guillermo. did you have fun at the show?

>> a lot of fun. >> jimmy: you did. on a scale of one to ten, how hung over are you right now? >> like nine. >> jimmy: a nine. [ cheers and applause ] so, guillermo -- guillermo has a unique interviewing style. typically, interviewers will look their subjects directly in the face, but guillermo is not typical in any way. he's an mortgageal. and so last night, he sat down with some of the winners, some of the performer, some of the precentsencentesen presenters like only he can. here is guillermo back-to-back. >> okay, five seconds of summer, i'm going to give you five seconds. what are utensils for? >> what? >> i want to give you five seconds, and you tell me what utensils are for. >> utensils? >> eating food. >> i'm going to show you a little trick. a little magic, too.

>> show me. >> okay, look. you see this tequila right here? >> yes. >> i'm going to make it disappear. >> go ahead. >> ta-da! you want a drink? good? >> yo, this is real tequila. >> here we go. >> wow. >> i usually get really horny and vomit when i take shots. >> me, too. >> this? okay, ready, go. one, two, three -- no, i did it. i did it. it was so good. >> you did it? >> now it's time for my

exclusivo but to but with yes, sir jessie j. >> thank you so much. >> i don't know what just happened. thank you. >> you want to do a selfie? >> let's do it. how do you do a selfie with this? here we do. i got it. in the camera. here we go. >> one, two, three. >> wow. >> five seconds to selfie! smile. >> hey, mr. sam, are you hungry? >> yeah. >> okay, i'm going to give you -- this is -- we give it in mexico. i know you from london, but i don't know if you guys have it, but this is a mexican churro. >> oh, my god. should i try it? >> yeah.

>> it's old. it's old. and horrible. >> can you please stay with me? >> no. that's horrible. >> hi, ladies. you look beautiful. >> thank you, guillermo. >> back at you. >> you look am-amazing. >> you see what he did? >> i thought it was a pickup line. >> one for you. >> did you play recorder in school? because i did. >> do it, do it. >> i never did. >> ready? ♪ ♪ >> that's some good [ bleep ]. >> yeah. >> yeah, i'm feeling it.

>> hey, guys, how are you? >> good, how is it going? >> good. >> hey, you guys won. like, how many times? >> too many times. >> three times, guillermo. >> wow. and you know what i want to do with you guys? can we harmonize? >> yeah. you hit it and we'll follow you. >> one, two, three -- ♪ back to you jimmy kimmel [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: very well done, guillermo. tonight on the show, oh, we have a good show for you tonight. ken jeong is here. we have a special celebrity curseoff. and we'll be right back with jennifer aniston, so stick around.

up to 27% more brush movements. patented sonic technology with get healthier gums in two weeks. innovation and you philips sonicare save when you give philips sonicare this holiday season. ( siren wails ) ( pop music playing ) ♪ when you're ready ♪ ready, ready, ready ♪ come and get it

♪ get it, get it ♪ when you're ready, come and get it ♪ ♪ na na na na ♪ na na na na na na na ♪ ♪ when you're ready, come and get it ♪ ♪ na na na na... female announcer: it's a great big world and it can all be yours. here and only here. ♪ come and get it.

♪ on a monday, got my striped britches, uh, huh ♪ ♪ on a tuesday, got my ball and chain, poor boy ♪

♪ i got stripes, stripes around my shoulders.. ♪ ♪ when you take a trip to gap, you could win a trip from gap. we're giving away a hundred trips... to great destinations... like new york, miami... aspen, las vegas... chicago and disney world. for more details on how to enter... go to: gapgetaway.com >> jimmy: hello there. tonight on the program, from the movie "penguins of madagascar," it's an animated movie, it opens in theaters wednesday, ken jeong

is here with us. he's a doctor, you know. he's a doctor. and we have a surprise competitor backstage right now warming up to take on one jennifer aniston in a celebrity curse-off. this is where we have two people on stage, they curse at each other back and forth, back and forth, until one of them gives up and can't take it anymore. so -- that is still to come. and it will be bleeped. tomorrow night, chris pine will join us, evangeline lilly will be here and we will have music from pitbull and ne-yo. and on wednesday, mindy kaling, ronda rousey from the ufc, and music from rick ross. which will be lovely for thanksgiving. [ laughter ] our first guest tonight is an emmy-winning star of screens big and small. she is beloved by all, even animals stop to smile in her presence. starting wednesday, you can see her alongside an all-star cast in "horrible bosses 2." please sayello to jennifer aniston.

[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: how are you? >> hi, jimmy. i can't hear you. >> jimmy: i know, i know. [ cheers and applause ] see that? >> woo! hi. >> jimmy: nice, right? >> so sweet. >> jimmy: a little bit scary, but nice. >> no, they're not charging you or anything, you know? >> jimmy: how are you? >> i'm doing great. >> jimmy: you look great. >> thanks, honey. >> jimmy: i know you've been traveling all over, promoting the movie. do you have any fun doing that? >> it's a lot of work, but we do -- we do have fun, you know. it's quick, we're usually never really get to see where we are, you know. >> jimmy: you go from -- do they

do it in hotels? >> yeah, you're in a hotel and usually you fly in, you barely get some sleep and then they roll you out and they just sort of dog and pony show you around. >> jimmy: so, it is no fun at all. >> i just basically described a horrible experience, didn't i? >> when it's a movie like this and there's a whole group of you -- >> jimmy: you all went together. >> yeah. >> jimmy: so, jason bateman -- >> mary elizabeth, charlie's wife, olivia, met us there. >> jimmy: everybody. >> amanda bateman. party plane! >> j >>. >> jimmy: was justin -- >> justin was there, as well. >> jimmy: do they charter you a plane, as well? >> no, we're on a big airplane. it was the new big airplane that's supposed to be -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: the new big airplane. >> it doesn't matter. it's all flying to me, which is terrifying. >> jimmy: you're scared to fly? >> oh, yeah. >> jimmy: are you really? >> you know what, i am, jimmy. i am.

>> jimmy: why? >> which makes it hard for me. when people say, where's your favorite place to go? i haven't been to a lot of beautiful places in this world because i really have -- i struggle with it. >> jimmy: so, what do you do? how do you handle it? do you medicate yourself? >> no, i don't. judy garland yourself. no, i -- but i have to say, on british airways -- what are you going to talk to me about? >> jimmy: it's all on there. you have your reading glasses? you can do the interview yourself. >> i know. that would be fun. but actually, british airways, the new big plane, they had, you foe, they have the movies, television, documentaries. and they had this one on the television section that said "flying with confidence." and i was like, i'd like to fly with confidence. [ laughter ] badly, actually. it's sort of like after the meal and people are starting to sort of fall asleep and it's dark, i have my headphones on, just like, praying i'll live.

and i turn on this video and this lovely british air way, you know, pilot comes on and just starts talking in this lovely voice about how my safety is their utmost priority. the turbulence, it's totally safe. just look at the window, everything is normanormal. by the end of it, he says, we urge you, our flight staff is totally prepared for heart attacks, panic attacks, births, and i'm going, heart attack? panic attack? and then they said, we urge you to tell our flight staff that you have this fear because then they will be to give you the extra tlc that you deserve. and now i find myself, i'm actually crying. because i feel like these people are so sweet and i get up and i'm like, i'm in the galley with everybody, going, like -- hi, so, i have a real fear of flying and they do give you, like, all this tlc. they check in on you. >> jimmy: are they touching you

and stuff? >> they come in, they go, are you all right? and i'm like, i'm all right, and i'm sleeping -- you didn't have to wake me up to ask me if i'm all right. >> jimmy: it seems like a little bit too much tlc. >> it's sweet. they were so great. the one flight attendant, his name was kevin, he became my bud, you know, and he -- as we were about an hour out, he was striking up conversation. he's like, so, you're on the hb-2 press tour, with a very beautiful english accent. >> jimmy: he's using the initials of the film? >> i saw you out there on "the graham norton" show and the premier. i tried to get into the red carpet but we were barricaded off and then he starts getting really worried. you're opening up against that juggernaut, "hunger games." and then he starts, like, what do they call it when your on the sidelines of the game.

handicapping, like, the box office weekend. >> jimmy: really? >> i was like, we're okay, we're going to do -- we'll be -- it's a juggernaut. we're going to be fine. >> jimmy: at that point, are you wishing you had not watched the video encouraging them to come over and help you? >> i was still happy, because if they're happy, i'm happy. >> jimmy: i see. >> if they're not afraid, i'm not afraid. >> jimmy: is that how you work? if somebody is freaking out next to you -- >> if i'm with somebody that is really nervous, i kind of take over and take care of them. i have a lot of -- >> jimmy: you feel okay with people that are happy. if you are with somebody that's freaking out, you're okay. seems like you're just okay. any situation, you're fine. what would you do if you don't have the safety video? >> we did have to fly from new york -- we went london to new york and then we were new york to l.a. and justin sweetly was the video. because he watched it, too.

he put his arm around me and started -- this is absolutely normal. >> jimmy: oh, really? >> just look okay. the turbulence is just like bumps on the water. >> jimmy: he is adorable. >> i just have to get a recording of him on my ipod. >> jimmy: i know we're here to talk about "horrible bosses 2." but i saw your movie "cake" on friday night. i saw a screening of it and -- you are unbelievable in it and it's a great movie and i think that -- i think you might, like, at least get nominated for an oscar, maybe even win -- [ cheers and applause ] now -- >> i think -- to throw that back to kevin on british airways. >> jimmy: i wonder what kevin thinks the box office will be. did kevin give you a figure for "horrible bosses?" if he's right -- >> the funny thing, he walked away, saying, you know, i guess the most important thing is it's just nice to be nominated.

so, i was like -- no, no, weekend box office is not like -- >> jimmy: well, kevin's way up in the sky. >> he's adorable. >> jimmy: we're going to take a break. when we come back, we'll talk about "horrible bosses 2." jennifer aniston is here. we'll be right back. i was stoked, that's my holiday. we invented it. so i'm like, pass the stuffing and...it's not stove top, and i'm like, "what?" i wait all year, 364 days to enjoy delicious stove top stuffing. it's what makes thanksgiving, thanksgiving! i had to get out of there. i faked an attack of scurvy. uughhhh! ughh! [ sighs ] scurvy... works every time. [ sighs ] scurvy...

[phone ringing] [phone ringing] [laughing] ♪

let's get you prepped. >> let's do it. >> you ever done it in a dentist chair? i'm going to make you forget all about him. >> let's get the chair ready. i'm going to visit the men's room real quick. >> you can do that on me. >> oh, it's -- it's -- >> and?

>> well -- first time on the slopes. i'm going to stay off the black diamond. >> either way. >> jimmy: that's jason bateman and jennifer aniston in "horrible bosses 2" which opens on wednesday. >> so nice. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that will be nice for the family around thanksgiving. >> yeah. that will be really fun for my very sweet elderly parents to watch that. >> jimmy: were you at all -- i noticed you were scolding yourself. >> i said, what? it's shocking. >> jimmy: do you ever think about that before you make a movie. well, i have an image, i have to uphold it -- >> no. well -- at this point in my life, no way. >> jimmy: no. [ laughter ] >> just, you got to say [ bleep ]. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: sometimes you do. >> sometimes you do. and it feels real nice. >> jimmy: i'm glad you said that, i feel like you are warming up for the competition.

>> yes. >> jimmy: we have coming up here. i think this is a disadvantage that your opponent knows who she is going to be competing against but you do not -- >> i have a disadvantage of that? >> jimmy: yeah, in a way, i think. >> but don't i have an advantage -- i don't know. >> jimmy: no. [ laughter ] >> i just lost the will to finish that thought. >> jimmy: i don't know that you do have an advantage. >> i don't know. >> jimmy: people who are just tuning in now, what we're going to do in a couple of minutes is, we're going to have a curse-off. >> yeah. >> jimmy: you're a celebrity, the other person you're competing against is a celebrity. >> in the same industry? >> jimmy: in the same industry, yes, yes, as a matter of fact. i'm going to say, this is -- a person that i'm certain you know. >> okay. >> jimmy: and i'm not going to say much more other than that, because i do want it to be kind of a surprise. >> okay. >> jimmy: do you think you will be able to muster the filth from

within to come up with -- >> i think we're going to have to give it a whirl. >> jimmy: you're going to have to. you're competitive? >> i'm not very competitive, but i will become right now. >> jimmy: okay. you're not competitive? [ cheers and applause ] >> i get -- i get tense. i don't want anybody -- people -- have you been to game nights at people's houses. >> jimmy: i hate that stuff. >> i'm like, absolutely, guys, this is a game. stop getting so mad. i'm leaving, i'm going home feeling shame. total shame and embarrassment. >> jimmy: you don't like that sort of stuff. i don't like that, either. i feel like it interrupts my talking. i like to talk to people. >> true. when we people poker, we played for five $20 buy-ins. that was sweet. >> jimmy: that's right. i lost $10,000 that night. >> long night. long night. >> jimmy: we're going to -- >> let's do this. >> jimmy: take a break. we have to take a break. we have to get everything set. we're going to have a whole thing. when we come bang, i shouck, i

mention, "horrible bosses 2" opens wednesday. and when we come back, jennifer aniston against a very special mystery competitor in celebrity curse-off. we'll be right back. wait, where is everybody? randy: oh they're all at old navy. amy: but i need my audience!! randy: i know, but someone is goi to win a million dollars on thanksgiving. amy: that's crazy! randy: they're crazy. amy: but this is my second to last farewell tour. randy: oh i know that, but thursday and friday, the entire store is 50% off. amy: well i wanna go, do you wanna come with? randy: uhh ya. amy: i don't like to be alone. randy: uhh, the doors open at 4pm. amy: do you have a car? randy: it's my mom's. amy: come with me. randy: yea! amy: who do you love more, me or your mother? randy: you.

up to 27% more brush movements. patented sonic technology with get healthier gums in two weeks. innovation and you philips sonicare save when you give philips sonicare this holiday season.

who convinced you to follow your dreams with one cross country roadtrip?d you give someone the greatest gift for someone who gave you these moments... is to give those moments back. dewar's. the most awarded blended scotch in history. millionaire athletes to be our spokesmen.ick, what with their entourages and on-set massages. we use these guys guys who fish for bass! massage sounds nice - no dice! that's just another way straight talk wireless can offer you the same phones and same coverage on america's best networks for half the cost of what you pay! you're scaring the fish away. am i? the world needs more straight talk. same phones. same networks. half the cost. get a samsung galaxy ace style. unlimited everything just $45 a month. only at walmart. ha-ha john! john and horace dodge launched their first car in 1914. but they were not only business partners, they were brothers.

competitive, stubborn... and always pushing each other. the way only broths can. [engine revving] ♪ ♪ one hundred years later, their spirit lives on.

>> jimmy: welcome back. if you are familiar with our show, you know that we are known for bleeping and blurring things

unnecessarily. but tonight, the bleeping will be necessary. it will be quite necessary. if you are faint of heart, i'd like you to ask you to cover your years. because it's time once again for america's most foul-mouthed competition. celebrity curse-off. our first contestant is an actor and film producer. her new movie "horrible bosses 2" opening on wednesday. please welcome jennifer aniston! [ cheers and applause ] facing off against jennifer tonight, a surprise competitor. they worked together once. at one time, people would even consider them to be friends. she has a new show now called "the comeback," which airs sunday nights on hbo. say hello to lisa kudrow! [ cheers and applause ] you can see the -- the affection

bubbling over. ladies, the rules are simple. each one of you will have five seconds to come up with a curse word. it has to be an original curse -- you can only use each word once. you can't repeat it. >> what? >> oh, if i saw a thing, she can't say it? >> jimmy: you can do a variation of it. but if she were to say the f-word, you may not say the f-word right back or we could be here forever. >> hyphen it. >> jimmy: that's accepted. >> okay. this is going all night. >> jimmy: i will be the judge in determining if the word is, in fact, a curse. >> oh. >> jimmy: which it must be. and my decisions are final. correct, guillermo? >> yes, jimmy. >> oh, guillermo. >> jimmy: we're going to go back and forth until somebody fails to deliver a curse word. when you say your word, hit this bottom and the clock will reset. ready to begin? >> very exciting. >> jimmy: i'm going to -- here we go. >> this is like family feud. >> jimmy: heads or tails?

>> tails. >> jimmy: it's heads. jennifer, do you want to begin -- >> well, i -- >> jimmy: or go second. >> i'll begin. >> jimmy: okay, all right. all right. are we ready? five seconds on the clock. jennifer, your first curse word is? >> [ bleep ]. >> jimmy: we're off to a very strong start. lisa? >> [ bleep ]. >> jimmy: jennifer. >> [ bleep ]. >> [ bleep ]. [ laughter ] >> you did say that all the time. >> jimmy: you guys are chitchatting. >> okay, okay, [ bleep ]. >> jimmy: what? i'm going to have to take your word for it on that one. >> that's fine. [ bleep ].

>> [ bleep ]. >> jimmy: strong. >> [ bleep ]. >> yeah. oh. >> jimmy: a phrase, but acceptable. oh, inherently not dirty but the sub text, filthy. >> oh, but it's mean, right? >> jimmy: yes, back to you. >> you call someone a [ bleep ]. >> jimmy: oh, a classic. >> what was it? >> [ bleep ]. >> i have a teenage son. >> i know. he's a teenager. okay. ah -- ah -- [ bleep ]. >> jimmy: oh. >> wow. >> jimmy: lisa? we know who you are. it's okay. >> you know who i am.

thank you, jimmy. >> jimmy: there you go. >> that gave me time. >> jimmy: it's your turn. >> it got suspended? >> jimmy: what? yeah, go ahead, yes. your turn. >> [ bleep ]. >> jimmy: okay. jennifer? >> [ bleep ]. >> oh. >> [ bleep ]. >> i'm sorry. i don't like it. >> i know. it's horrible. [ bleep ] sandwich. >> jimmy: lisa? >> um -- >> get french on us. >> [ bleep ]. >> jimmy: i'll take your word for that one. i don't know what that means. >> i don't, either. >> french? >> jimmy: the french girls are blushing and excited. yes.

jennifer, back to you. can i get a ruling on that? have we had that one? >> i think we have. >> jimmy: we have not. lisa, back to you. >> oh, i -- snap pants. >> jimmy: snap pants? i'm sorry, but that is not a curse. snap pants -- can we go to the standards and practices? snap pants is not bleepable. not a curse. lisa, i'm sorry, but jennifer aniston is the winner. [ cheers and applause ] congratulations. don't be scared. and there is your prize. soap on a rope. thank you for playing. jennifer aniston, lisa kudrow. we'll be right back with ken jeong.

♪ when the snow comes to cover the ground. ♪ ♪ it's a time for play, it's a whipped cream day... ♪ ♪ uright now when you get a new tdata planith a tablet on us!

you can also get our most popular 7 inch tablet. that's right on us. so get to t-mobile, get a new data plan, and get a tablet on us. it's customer appreciation at subway! we're saying thanks with two of your favorite six-inch sandwiches for $2 each! the meatball marinara and the cold cut combo. join our customer appreciation celebration today. subway. eat fresh.

♪ when the snow comes to cover the ground. ♪ ♪ it's a time for play, it's a whipped cream day. ♪ ♪ i wait for it all year round... ♪ ♪ ♪ [instrumental music] ♪

♪ ♪ it's a marshmallow world in the winter. ♪ ♪ >> jimmy: hi there, we are back. the moment our next guest

emerged angry and nude from the trunk of a car in the first "hangover" movie, he's held a special place in our hearts. his latest film is "penguins of madagascar." it opens on thursday. please say hello to ken jeong. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: you know, ken -- you are a cursing gold medalist after "the hangover." >> [ bleep ] yeah. that's right. >> jimmy: how are you? >> i'm doing great. >> jimmy: what are your plans for thanksgiving? >> we're going to stay local. >> jimmy: good. >> my wife is a physician, so, she's working. she's on call during -- >> jimmy: she is? >> yeah, she's on call, so we're going to keep it real, be with my wife and two daughters. >> jimmy: you don't practice at all anymore? >> no.

>> jimmy: you still have your license. >> still have my license. >> jimmy: people that don't know, ken is a doctor. a real doctor. not a tv doctor. do your patients at the time know that you were a comedian? >> yeah, they did initially. someone saw me on television. back in the day i would be a doctor by day and like very hack can i, hip hop goofy standup comedian by night and my first tv experience, one of my patients saw me. it was a 73-year-old elderly white lady during a physical, she goes -- i saw you on b.e.t. comic view. she goes, west side til i die y'all. and i'm like -- that could happen any day, please don't say that. >> jimmy: and here you are now. well, you have this big animated movie. you wrapped your first leading role in a film, which is excite. >> yeah, it called "killing hasselhoff" and it stars david

hasselhoff and he is so good in this movie, and he loved it. he read the script and by script, i mean the title, and it was like -- amazing. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you send him -- were you worried that he could be troubled by the title? >> yeah, i was worried. and i didn't know him. and i was worried because he didn't know who i was. but he's so friendly. he didn't know my credits or name. he tried. he goes, hey, kim young, everybody! world famous from "parks and rec" and "super bad." >> jimmy: he was doing an introduction of you on your movie. >> yeah. hey, hey! he was like that. he's like dice clay with even the worst perm, i guess. hey! >> jimmy: does he still do the thing where he works the word hoff into various -- >> oh, man. that boy goes into a pun fit like nobody. he's like, hoff the record,

nothing was hoff limits. now, get me a cup of hoffee. he had a pun seizure, which is medically dangerous, and pearly obnoxious as [ bleep ]. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: well, that seems -- [ cheers and applause ] >> yeah. >> jimmy: that seems terrible. >> it was terrible. >> jimmy: seems like you had a terrible experience. >> he's a good man. he's a great family man and he's so funny in the movie. >> jimmy: it's like also being in, like, an acting masters class when you are with david hasselhoff. >> are you talking about the car? yeah, i agree. the kid or the bathing suit? i don't know. >> jimmy: you are in this -- david hasselhoff is not in "penguins of madagascar." >> no, he is not. this is a spin-off of the very popular franchise. it's such an honor to be in it. it's coming out wednesday. i really did it for my kids. this is kind of the first movie my kids can actually see me in,

so -- >> jimmy: yeah. >> it's a lot of fun to do this. and i really don't know much -- i don't note much about kids movies and penguins. it would be great to have, like, a child's perspective on it. >> jimmy: on the film itself? >> on the film. and my family, my daughter is backstage. i don't know if you -- >> jimmy: she saw the movie? >> she saw it yesterday. >> jimmy: let's find out what she thinks. >> you want to see my daughter? honey? >> jimmy: guillermo -- >> can we get her? oh, your daughter really is here. come in. >> jimmy: how are you? how are you doing? i thought this was a bit of some kind. is this really your dad? >> yeah. >> this is the light of my life, the apple of my eye, this is my daughter. what is your name again? >> zoe. >> jimmy: how old are you?

>> 7. >> jimmy: you saw the movie? >> yeah. >> jimmy: and? >> did you like it? >> yeah. >> did you think it was funny? >> yeah, but i didn't laugh. >> you didn't laugh? >> jimmy: you didn't laugh. >> okay, okay, all right. don't be too honest, babe, all right? hey! kim young, everybody. did you think daddy was funny? >> kind of. >> kind of? okay. what's the correct answer? >> yes. >> yes, good job. all right. all right. good, good, good. good. good, yeah. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: wow, that's -- it'ser are markable. >> i'm a good dad. >> jimmy: show business is really in the family. >> yeah, yeah. she's a good dog daughter. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: do you want to be --

>> oh, okay. sorry. i'm the bad guy. >> jimmy: do you want to be an actor, too, when you grow up? >> yeah. >> jimmy: you do? >> she thinks it's so easy to be an actor. she watches me -- all right, don't hijack the bit. she thinks this is so easy. she thinks anyone can act. she watches me, like -- she doesn't know how hard this is, jimmy. she doesn't know, like -- this, this is an instrument for an actor, all right? here in front of a nationwide audience, i want to challenge you, sir, to a faceoff. >> jimmy: what is a faceoff? >> just throw us an emotion and we'll act it out for the audience to decide. >> jimmy: oh, all right. >> subtle emotions of faces by me and my daughter. what is your naim agame again? >> zoe. >> jimmy: we'll start with happy. okay. [ laughter ] sad. angry.

confused. wow. >> subtle. >> jimmy: that is amazing. it's like -- well, zoe, i don't know if you know this, but you have a very weird dad. did you know that? >> yeah. >> jimmy: yeah, i figured you did. happy thanksgiving. thank you for coming out here and i like your little flowers in your hair match the dress and everything. >> thank you. >> jimmy: thank you. thank you for being here. that's ken jeong, everybody. his daughter zoe. "penguins of madagascar" opens in theaters wednesday. we'll be right back. stay here one minute. we'll be right back.

♪ [ male announcer ] follow your joy to a celebration like no other. start your new orleans holiday at followyournola.com. >> jimmy: all right. that was a fun night. i want to thank jennifer aniston, lisa kudrow. oh, zoe. did you see the thing where the two ladies were saying bad words to each other? >> yeah. >> jimmy: oh, you did? >> we -- me and my wife muted half of it.

>> jimmy: only half? >> well -- >> jimmy: jennifer left this soap behind. wash your ears out with this. it should all be fine. >> jimmy: thanes to ken and zoe. apologize to matt damon, we did run out of time for him. he will be rescheduled in the future. "nightline" is next. thanks -- we didn't really, it's a joke. good night.

this is a special edition of "nightline" -- decision in ferguson. >> breaking news. protesters clashing with police flooding the streets as the city descends into a cloud of tear gas. after the grand jury decides not to indict officer darren wilson in the killing of unarmed 18-year-old michael brown. and we are in the eye of the storm. now, with tensions running high, swift, widespread reaction across the country -- in a half dozen cities, from new york to oakland to los angeles. all eyes on the missouri city. the brown family calling for peace in spite of their profound disappointment. what this means and what happens next.