>> we appreciate your time. right now jimmy kimmel comedian mel brooks. >> have a good night everyone see >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- mel brooks. from "into the woods," christine baranski. this year in unnecessary censorship. and music from jenny lewis. with cleto and the cletones. and now, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you very much. thank you. i'm jimmy. i'm the most of the show thank

you for the watching. happy holidays to everyone. do you like my look? i bought this -- i bought this at the men's yhouse. i saw this online. it came in the box. i never got a suit in the box before. this is like the franzio of suits. i got one for guillermo, too. [ cheers and applause ] you actually look like -- you look like a mexican politician. >> i do i like it. i feel very sexy. >> jimmy: you look very sexy. we look like at the christmas aisle at cvs. 100% polyester and 200% amazing. i definitely agree with the polyester part of it. christmas, only one week from tonight.

which means you better start practicing you're oh, my god, i love it face. do people hang mistletoe in their house? 2,000 ago, a holly child was made. without holes he couldn't breathe or eat. christmas is a strange holiday. it's jesus' birthday. i didn't get him anything. i got you an ipad. nobody knows jesus' exact birthday because he refuses to sign up for facebook. we celebrate, it's the third night of hannukah, which means the jewish kids are r already three present up. but we'll catch up to them. we're like the tom brady of the gift givers. >> hi, everybody, happy hannukah! [ cheers and applause ]

>> hi jimmy. >> jimmy: hello. >> who are you? i'm the hanukkorn. it's night number three as you can see, by my horn candles. [ laughter ] >> oh yeah, i have never heard of that before. >> some people call me the jewacorn. i know many jewish people no one mentioned the hanukorn. >> that's bizarre. i'm sure your audience know about it. right, people? [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: i'm sorry. this is one of our writers on the show. definitely trying to get

hannukah material into the show the past five weeks. he created this fake character, which isn't real. >> it is a real thing. if it's not real, how do you explain the popularity of my song. hit it ♪ note [ applause ] >> jimmy: hang on, first of all. that's a terrible song. that's "jingle bells." ladies and gentlemen, i bring to you -- >> jimmy: wow. ♪ >> jimmy: there you go.

hanukorn and driedel dog. in mexico, they spell hannukah with a lot of "j." how many are you visiting for the holidays tonight? the only thing more special than shopping for the holidays is traveling. they say this will be the busiest holiday travel season estimated. traveling more than 50 miles to be with their families for christmas. imagine how far we would go to see people we like. more than 9 out of 10 travelers will be traveling because of the price of gas. it's always a little odd going home for the holidays you realize things like, your parents have had the same weird

bowl of dried potpourri in high school. the toilet seats are cushioned. you know, the other thing activisting parents, they can't wait for you to wake up. the worst thing you can do to your parents is sleep late when visiting. they want to get up and talk to them. they can't wait. a comment. you wake up, we assumed you were dead. [ laughter ] . you assumed your son was dead and your response was to keep eating oatmeal. this is theo. he's a pooping christmas log. put a log in the fireplace and

ordered it to poop for real. in order to make it poop they beat it with sticks. that's some serious patty training there. in the weeks leading up to christmas, they cover it with a blanket. on christmas day, the children hit it with sticks and then go into another room to pray. while they're praying, their parents hide candy and they tell them the log pooped them out. they have a log that poops out candy -- why would it want to give your present after that? other countries are weird. a very good show tonight. the man, the incredible mel brooks is here with us tonight. [ cheers and applause ]

. a great way to wrap up the year. this week, we started with garth brooks and we finish it out with mel. mel, his first name is short for melted butter. his given name is melted butter brooks. in the '60s, mel directed a satire about a dictator called the producers. he did it after hitler was dead. you know star wars episode 7 comes out exactly one year from today. as long as we don't get threats from darth vader. now, i like to take a moment if you'll allow me to thank some of the unsung heroes of our staff. four guys that watch tv all day and night. looking for funny and strange moments for us to see. their names are jacks joe jesse

and anthony. at the end of the each year, just before they die, they go through all of the great clips that we find. we select the best of the best. time now for nominees for clip of the year 2014. [ applause ] and the nominees are -- [ applause ] for "clip of the year" here's ronny. >> [ laughter ] >> stop and drink the roses.

>> -- matched her and her supporters to say a prayer, being hospitalized for a stress-related illness. they'll work together in this harrisburg area. [ cheers and applause ] >> room-o mars. ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: bow ties speak louder than words. >> the lord tonight has set you free. >> yes, sir. >> turn around and tell those people. >> i'm not gay no more. i don't like men no more.

i like women, women, women. i said women, i'm not gay. i would datenot date a man. i will not put on makeup. i will love a woman. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: raved and confused. >> it was a party for the records box, capturing these images, with a crowd of roughly 2,000 people cheering him on on, with two deejays, go go dancers and strirps. he said he successfully threw the largest party to hit western michigan. >> i didn't make anyone stay here until 7:00 a.m. i didn't make this kid pass out on my floor. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: and saran trap.

>> jimmy: and the winner of "clip of the year 2014" is -- bowties speak louder than words. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: unfortunately the star of this video was unable to be here accepting this award. here to accept on his behalf, please welcome george takei. george. [ cheers and applause ] >> thank you, jimmy. andrew would have loved to be here tonight. but, he's busy watching the titans/jaguars game with all of his totally straight friends. [ laughter ]

so, on behalf of the gay community, i would like to say, andrew, we're sorry to see you go. and we'll miss you and we'll miss all of your festive bowties. and if you change your mind and want to come back, we would be glad to beam you right back up! [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] no questions asked. so, now, if you'll forgive me, i have to go back to being not straight no more. thank you. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: george takei, thank you. >> jimmy: tonight on the show, music from jenny lewis. christine baranksi is here, plus this year in unnecessary censorship.

and we'll be right back with the legendary mel brooks. so, stick around. ♪ ♪ when the snow comes to cover the ground ♪ ♪ it's a time for play, it's a whipped cream day ♪ ♪ i wait for it all year round ♪ ♪ in winter it's a marshmallow world. ♪ ♪ who convinced you to follow your dreams with one cross country roadtrip?d you give someone

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[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hello again, everyone. tonight, from "into the woods," which opens christmas day, christine baranski is here. then later, a very gifted singer/songwriter, her newest album is called "the voyager," jenny lewis from the at&t outdoor stage. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: if our first guest's 60 years in show business teach us anything, it's that it's good to be the king. he is the mind behind and in front of movies like "the producers," "blazing saddles" and "young frankenstein," just to name a few of the greats, and his very first one-man show, "mel brooks live at the geffen" debuts january 31st on hbo, please welcome the one and only mel brooks! [ cheers and applause ]

[ cheers and applause ] >> thank you. >> jimmy: the same gaining gang from the last time you were here. >> never mind. it's almost nice to be here. [ laughter ] >> but man, that's loud. >> jimmy: i make mistakes. >> you'll feel like a fool when you see it. you watch the show you'll be like -- was i crazy? >> jimmy: i feel like we should sit, right?

we got the chairs. >> watch this. if we sit -- >> jimmy: yeah. >> okay, watch me. every time i do this show, i have a stiff neck for two weeks. >> jimmy: okay. >> so, i'm moving my seat, okay, he's taking the star's seat, you got to look upstage, all people -- >> jimmy: sit right here. sit right here. [ cheers and applause ] there you go. let me see what it's like. you're right, it's uncomfortable. it uncomfortable. now, you're going have to hurdle the thing. it's almost like we're square-dancing. >> hi, how are you? >> later. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: you're the director.

you know, it's -- it's -- you know, it's also [ laughter ] >> not only are we looking up stage, but he's higher, so much higher. oh, let's see. let's see. okay, wait a minute. we'll work it through. >> jimmy: you need a booster seat? >> okay. [ cheers and applause ] >> a pleasure to be here. >> jimmy: welcome. >> a pleasure to be here. >> jimmy: do you celebrate hannukah? >> yeah, i do everything. >> jimmy: good. it's for kids mostly. >> it is for kids. >> jimmy: but you're still a kid at heart, i would say. >> well, i'm almost 100. but at heart, i am a kid. >> jimmy: you made some controversial movies in his time

and now we have this story about sony and the interview and north korea, pulling the movie out of the theaters. >> i would hate until he was dead. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: you're no dummy. >> i'm no dummy. >> jimmy: what do you make of all that? >> it's -- you know, i don't know how crazy they are. so i'm going to ask you to stop talking about this. [ laughter ] >> they're like -- >> jimmy: don't worry, they'll never spot us with me in this red suit. you're lucky -- >> i never expected you to be funny [ laughter ] >> jimmy: young frankenstein is one of my all-time favorite movies. this is the 40th anniversary of that movie coming out. they honored you on the blog. >> it's very sweet.

he said, can i name a street after you? i said no. how about a boulevard? so they named a boulevard. >> jimmy: boulevard is the way to go, it sounds better. they also painted an enormous mural on the side of the building, will this be there permanently? >> yes, perm nanltly. >> jimmy: that's fantastic. [ cheers and applause ] >> permanentpermanently, that's months. that's permanently. >> jimmy: next summer they'll have the ghostbusters' 30th anniversary. that will be the end of that. with that movie, always intended to be shot in black and white. you sometimes get confused, all movies were in black and white back then. >> gene wilder and i made a packet that it would be in black

and white. we had a deal with columbia, we shook hands, make the movie for $2 million, this was in 1973, and on the way out of the meeting, i tilt my head back in the room and i said, oh, by the way, it's going to be in black and white and i left, down the hall, you heard thundering jews, 28 jews chasing, no, no -- so columbia wasn't going for it. but he just took over fox and my producer knew him well, got the script to him and he said it should be in black and white. i'll give you $100 more to make it. so, anyway -- [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that was the right call. now, it's parented on the side of the wall.

by the way, your one-man show is unbelievable. it's so funny. [ laughter ] >> people understand. >> jimmy: no one understands. >> you know, i'm a nervous guy. >> jimmy: can we get mel another glass of vodka. mel brooks is here. we'll be right back.

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they send me to ft. -- in oklahoma, if you get a chance don't get there. it's cold, it's flat. their ain't much to do and they send me there. i never forgot that. use it to the advantage. >> jimmy: "mel brooks live at the geffen" january 31st. >> watch it for the very last time on january 31st. >> jimmy: they're only airing it once. >> last. hbo keeps it for a week or two. >> jimmy: you want people to watch it. >> i got 400 before but they

were very generous. >> jimmy: is it okay if people dvr it and watch it later if the week? >> i don't like that. it's there. [ bleep ] see it! [ cheers and applause ] >> i hate that. you know, listen, there's a climate of excitement when something happens for the first time. >> jimmy: i agree with you. >> when i was a kid, these fireside chats, you heard fdr, no one ever dvr'ed fdr. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: last time you were here -- >> it was a stupid idea. >> jimmy: i know. i'm in this ridiculous -- i feel like i own a bird or something like that. the last time you were here -- >> don't be funny.

>> jimmy: i'm sorry. [ laughter ] >> we talked -- are you high on pot or -- [ cheers and applause ] >> i never -- calm down, will you? you're very excited. calm down. you know. >> jimmy: i'm sure they have a good medical reason to be high on pot, if they're indeed high on pot. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: the last time you were here -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: we talked about alfred hit hitchcock who's a person you knew -- our drummer is high on pot. [ laughter ] >> i was a drummer. i was a drummer. the comic got sick. so, the owner of the hotel said,

mel, boy, you know that junk, you do the comedy, put the sticks down, i got on the stage and i did impressions. the first impression i did was frank sinatra singing "america the beautiful." [ cheers and applause ] >> want to hear it. >> jimmy: of course. >> okay, wait, wait. ♪ hey beautiful ♪ for spacious skies for amber waves of grain ♪ ♪ for purple mountain majesty above the trut i fruiti plains ♪

♪ god shed his dpras on thee never mind. >> [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that's great. were you scared to go up there? >> when i did -- high anxiety, i got a note from sinatra saying, he said i sent the note to the guy who used to run the casino. he said, if i ever got sick, put mel brooks in there. >> jimmy: that's a great compliment. >> but no comedy. >> jimmy: you got a beautiful voice. >> i'm on the hbo special on january 31st. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: it's a real treat to have you here. i thank you so much for coming. . >> i would like to thank you. but i'm not sure, you know, for

what you pay me and for the seat and everything, i'm not sure it was a good idea. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> no, seriously, this has been a joy, bless you. >> jimmy: i hope you come back soon. "mel brooks live at the geffen" debuts saturday, january 31st, at 9:00 p.m. on hbo. we'll be right back with this year in unnecessary censorship. [ cheers and applause ] [martha and mildred are good to. go. here's your invoice, ladies. a few stops later, and it looks like big ollie is on the mend. it might not seem that glamorous having an old pickup truck for an office... or filling your days looking down the south end of a heifer, but...i wouldn't have it any other way. look at that, i had my best month ever. and earned a shiny new office upgrade. i run on quickbooks. that's how i own it. from their favorite aunt?

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[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome back. christine baranski and music from jenny lewis are on the way, but first we have a cherished tradition to uphold. as you probably know, every week on this show we bleep and blur things whether they need it or not. and they never really need it. and with 2014 coming to a close we compiled our bleepiest moments from the year and assembled them into one seemingly-profane package. and without further nonsense it's time for "this year in unnecessary censorship." [ cheers and applause ] >> today on "the chew" we're sending you into the weekend with [ bleep ] and [ bleep ]. >> an hour of [ bleep ]. so delicious. you'll never look at a casserole

the same way again. entertainment news, taylor swift just [ bleep ] sold a million copies. >> i would like you to say [ bleep ]. >> 53 players on the team. [ bleep ] every day after practice. you literally hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of men. you really think none of them were gay. >> smaller than it is? >> my [ bleep ]. >> welcome. and delicious. >> my mom reached out and grabbed him. >> the doors open at 2:00. >> solid as a [ bleep ] rock.

>> we do that at the sajak house every night. [ cheers and applause ] . >> jimmy: we'll be right back with christine baranski. have a cuervo.

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[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: if, by this time next week, you're sick and tired of hearing "jingle bells" and you can join our next guest for show tunes instead. she stars with meryl streep, anna kendrick, emily blunt, johnny depp and many more in the big movie musical "into the woods." it opens christmas day. please welcome christine baranski! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: did you meet the great mel brooks? >> am i supposed to follow mel brooks? >> jimmy: it's impossible. >> oh, my god, it's like a frat party back there.

you're on your way to hiatus. it's definitely hiatus energy. >> jimmy: everything is screwed up. >> people are having some beers back there. >> jimmy: wished they would wait until the show is over. >> i considered it. >> jimmy: at least 40% of our guests are drunk when come out here. did you ever perform drunk. >> ied had two glasses between shows, it's definitely scary. not when you're doing obscure frank play -- >> jimmy: when i do that, i never had -- tracey allman was here earlier in the week, she said you she, you and meryl streep did some drinking together. >> how these stories developed. i saw her at a cocktail party last week. we're doing the press for "into the woods."

he said baranski, have you spreading rumors that we have been closing joints? >> jimmy: she challenged you -- >> all that happens was the three of us adore each other. we wanted to have a nice dinner, but we were filming the next day. we said, let's have an early dinner, 6:00. me and meryl streep got a text message, the shoot has been canceled. we began dinner at 6:00 and the waiters were waiting for us to leave at about 1:00. >> jimmy: oh, really? >> that doesn't mean we rolled out drunk. but we had a great time. women, like the three of us, really dig each other and it was great to be in a musical together. >> jimmy: yeah, you were in mama mia with meryl streep -- >> yeah, we had some fun on that one, too. >> jimmy: did you? she's a lot of fun?

>> yes. actresses talk about her like she's so intimidated. >> jimmy: i'm surprised how completely down to earth she is. >> goofy, funny, great listener. she's scary in this movie. have you seen this movie? >> jimmy: i no, i haven't. >> she's awesome. >> jimmy: she's a very good actor but i haven't seen any of her films [ laughter ] >> my favorite, there was a comment yesterday from somebody, a kid, saw a screening and he said, my son actually said, oh, there are the two ladies from "mamma mia." >> jimmy: that's how it goes, right? meryl streep told us her house is haunted. have you been to her haunted houses? >> i have also lived in a

haunted house. my husband grew up in 18th century farmhouse. he inherited the house. that's where we raised our kids. there's a well-known ghost named barefoot charlie. >> jimmy: how do you know his name, does he get mail? [ laughter ] >> he was named barefoot charlie -- that's an interesting question. i don't know. but he definitely makes mischief. my husband said when he was a little boy, he heard a piano being played downstairs. there was nobody in the house. a piano was playing. i only know of this ghost because it's a mischievous ghost, because things are gone. >> jimmy: guys doing construction at my house, stuff

disappears. "into the woods." -- >> all of these different fairy-tale characters. you have had emily on and tracey on. it's a phenomenal movie, rob marshall has done a great job of directing it. sondheim music. james corden is the baker. and tracey is jack's mom. it's a delicious movie. >> jimmy: you play which character? >> i play cinderella's evil stepmom. somebody has to do it. bad attitude, great clothes. it's kind of what i do. [ cheers and applause ] . >> jimmy: when you play a role like that do you base on incidences where you see the movie before? >> no.

you base it on a lot of different influences. rob and i talked about how this particular step family, their hair is too big, too blonde, everything's a little much. if they were in contemporary life, they would want their own reality show. u know where i'm going here. >> jimmy: yes. interesting. i think they'll be delighted by that. wow, all right. you're saying it's like a sex thing? >> no. >> jimmy: oh, maybe i said that. >> can't get enough attention thing. >> jimmy: very good to see. hope you have a terrific holiday. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: christine baranski! "into the woods" opens christmas day. we'll be right back with jenny lewis. [ cheers and applause ]

[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: i'd like to thank mel brooks, christine baranski, george takei, and i want to apologize to matt damon, we ran out of time. "nightline" is next, but first, her album is called "the voyager," here with the song "she's not me" with some help from z berg and ryan adams, jenny lewis. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ ♪ i used to think you could save me i've been wondering lately ♪ ♪ heard she's having your baby and everything's so amazing ♪

♪ it goes on and on and on and on it goes on and on and on and on ♪ ♪ but she's not me she's easy ♪ ♪ all those times we were makin' love i never thought we'd be breakin' up ♪ ♪ i bet you tell her i'm crazy ♪ ♪ it goes on and on and on and on it goes on and on and on and on ♪

♪ but she's not me she's easy ♪ ♪ remember the night i destroyed it all when i told you i cheated ♪ ♪ and you punched through the drywall i took you for granted when you were all that i needed ♪ ♪

♪ but she's not me she's easy ♪ ♪ ♪ she's easy

♪ she's easy [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ all our friends they're gettin' on but the girls are still staying young ♪ ♪ if i get caught being rude in a conversation with a child bride on her summer vacation ♪ ♪ no matter how hard i try

to be just one of the guys there's a little something inside that won't let me ♪ this is "nightline." >> tonight a major development in the case of two 12-year-old girls who allegedly stabbed their friend 19 times to impress the fictional character, slender man. the victim survived. tonight, those girls are heading to an adult court after the judge finds them competent to stand trial. plus, we're behind the scenes of the multitalented oprah on the set of his latest film. selma, already a top contender in award season. and tis the season for chocolate. it may be a $20 billion industry.