kimmel li kimmel live tlt coming up. >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live!" tonight -- kevin costner. from "big fan," andy richter. and comedian k. trevor wilson. and now, more likely than not -- here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: hi, welcome. i'm jimmy, i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thanks to all of you for coming. it is my pleasure to welcome

you. that's right. thank you. thank you for showing up here and not at my home, i appreciate that. hey, before we get going i need to thank somebody. i need to thank our guitar player, toshi, he's from japan, he went back home to japan over the holiday break, how was it? you saw the whole family? >> yeah. >> jimmy: he brought me back a gift. one year you brought me a kimono, which was nice, i wear it to the mailbox every morning. but this year toshi, who i know you didn't expect me to mention this, you brought me what this. >> shampoo. >> jimmy: shampoo. he brought me a bottle -- i guess this is special shampoo for people with thinning hair? >> well -- yes. i use it. >> jimmy: so toshi gave me the shampoo. then this was an extra thing, you stood in front of my desk and explained how to use it. correct me if i have it wrong. you said, wet your hair, then lather on the shampoo, then rinse it off. >> yeah.

massage your head, yes. >> jimmy: right, right, right. see, normally -- [ laughter ] usually when i do it, i squirt it in the air, try to get it to land on my head, then i shake it until it's gone. [ laughter ] thank you, toshi. i can honestly say no man has ever given me shampoo before in my life. [ cheers and applause ] hey, while we're on the subject of gifts, over the break my brother and sister-in-law who live in kansas city sent our daughter jane, who's 2 years old, this -- do we have the picture? giant 8-foot-tall teddy bear. cute if it's not in your house. [ laughter ] so we did not want the teddy bear. they hinted a few weeks earlier they were goingn to send it. we said, please don't. then we have this giant thing in the house.

and of course it showed up anyway. it was delivered on a freight truck in a box on christmas eve. it took two of us just to get it into the house. and now it's in our house permanently. and of course my daughter loves it. it's the size of a refrigerator. it's ridiculous. so i, to thank them for this thoughtful gift, i went on my computer, i went on to costco.com, and i sent five of these bears to their house. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: maddy and jack, my nephew, they love the bears. they arrived this morning, now the whole family's trapped in the house. we tried to send a live bear but the authorities won't allow that apparently. let that be a lesson to any of those of you out there who challenge my resolve. you send my one bear, i will send back five! [ laughter ] so toshi, you massage the shampoo into the hair? [ laughter ] donald trump has been in a war of words lately with what will

soon be his own intelligence agencies. the cia, fbi, and department of homeland security say they strongly believe and have evidence that indicates that russia hacked american computers during the election. trump maintains not only does he say he doesn't buy their story about russian hacking, when he goes to the grocery store, he won't even buy russian dressing, that's how hardcore this man is. but he says he knows things about hacking that other people don't know. and at some point he'll give us the details. which that is the white house equivalent of telling your friends you have a girlfriend who lives in canada. [ laughter ] the obamas are packing up their stuff, they're leaving. the first lady is saying her final good-byes to her vegetable garden before trump builds a kfc on top of it. friday the obamas are throwing a farewell party at the white house. quite a guest list. the list reportedly includes oprah, samuel l. jackson, j.j. abrahams, bradley cooper, beyonce and jay-z.

then the end of the party beyonce and jay-z will move out, chachi and gary busey will move in. not only are the obamas having a big going-away party. j.j. abrams is making a film out of it. >> people sometimes ask me what the biggest perk of being president is. number one's the plane. number two -- ♪ >> barack obama's block party! >> it's the house party of the century. but there's only one problem. >> everybody having a good time? >> the new landlord. >> wrong. >> you want to give me a good sendoff? >> starring oprah. bradley cooper. samuel l. jackson. >> ain't nobody cooler than you. >> kid n play. and santa claus.

♪ >> drop the beat. >> white house party. >> this was spectacular. >> rated nc-17. >> jimmy: all right, i'll watch that. [ cheers and applause ] that looks fun. just thinking, it must be weird to leave the white house after living in it for eight -- you know when you live in a house when you grow up, then move to another town, years go by, you get older, come back, knock on the door with your kids and ask if you can come in and show them around? i wonder if president families do that? i wonder if sasha and malia will come with their kids to show where they carved "i love justin bieber" on the night stand next to the lincoln bed or something. this is exciting for those of us alive which i think is most of us. a university professor in ireland has identified a new organ in the human body. there's one we didn't know about in there. it's a special thing when we discover an organ. it happened to me in the fifth grade. [ laughter ]

and i really have to say. this one, this is a real organ. it connects to the -- the intestinal to the abdomen. they named it the mesentery. there it is. it's cute, right? every so often a story like this comes around and it reminds you how disgusting the human body truly is. this is where the mesentery is located. right between the spare ribs and bread basket there. finding a new organ is a surprising thing considering how long we've been -- turns out it was hiding inside our bodies the whole time so it's very clever. hello, mesentery, and welcome aboard, on behalf of all of us. [ laughter ] [ applause ] >> jimmy: no, no, please don't do that, i don't need it. [ laughter ] i've been shampooing all day. remember bo bice, the guy from "american idol" in like 1985? bo bice is in the news because of an incident that took place at a popeye's restaurant in the

atlanta airport. >> musician bo bice says he was stunned last friday when employee at popeye's chicken in hartsfield-jackson made a racial comment. >> one of the three young ladies behind the corner said, he's already got his, that white boy over there. >> an emotional bice says the issue goes much farther than this particular incident. >> and the fact that i've got to sit on tv -- calm down and look like a petty little brat by tweeting and facebooking this just to open up dialogue so we can have an adult conversation is ridiculous. in america you should be ashamed. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: what did we do? i feel unfairly accused. i've been nothing but nice to bo bice. [ laughter ] i think bo needs a friend is really what the case is. in other social media news, kim

kardashian is back. she has returned to instagram just as the bible foretold. [ laughter ] she's been on a break from twitter and instagram and all that since october when she was robbed in paris. but after three months of sobriety, she's using again. [ laughter ] she tweeted a photo of her family. her stepmother, this is interesting. tomorrow mack cosmetics is releasing a new makeup line inspired by caitlyn jenner. this is the first line of makeup targeted specifically at people who just took four tylenol p.m. [ laughter ] why is she asleep? put that up again for just a second. it looks like the funeral home did a really good job. there's a new law in effect here in california. not enough people are talking about it. as of january 1st, residents of this state are not allowed to hold their cell phones while driving for any reason whatsoever.

which means our prisons are about to get a lot more crowded. [ laughter ] because everyone -- how will this work? where are we supposed to put it? we can't hold them in our purses, that's where we keep our dogs here. [ laughter ] you're no longer allowed to use your hands on your cell phone. only exception is if the phone is mounted the new law does allow the driver to touch it once to activate or deactivate a feature or function with the motion of a single swipe or tap. is anyone else getting turned on listening to this? [ laughter ] the law doesn't say anything about using your feet. you can still do that. i'm actually glad they did this. i hate, i hate seeing people looking at their phones. i do it myself all the time. but i hate when other people do it. and it really has to stop. speaking of the hazards of driving, from time to time we have fun with delivery drivers. we set up hidden cameras in a house and order things to be delivered to my cousin sal. today sal ordered thai food and gave a thai food delivery guy --

i think he gave him a lot to think about. ♪ >> you serious? the whole thing?

>> yeah, that's -- that's hot. [ laughter ] right on. uh, yeah, okay. um. there you go. >> sal: that was excellent. really delicious. thank you.

[ laughter ] [ applause ] >> sal: it burns a little bit. >> jimmy: all right, thank you cousin sal. sal is no longer able to have children. tonight we have a great show. andy richter is here, k. trevor wilson is here. be right back with kevin costner, so stick around! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ i had that dream again -- that i was on the icelandic game show. and everyone knows me for discounts, like safe driver and paperless billing. but nobody knows the box behind the discounts. oh, it's like my father always told me -- "put that down. that's expensive." of course i save people an average of nearly $600, but who's gonna save me? [ voice breaking ] and that's when i realized... i'm allergic to wasabi. well, i feel better. it's been five minutes. talk about progress. [ chuckles ] okay. talk about progress. [ chuckles ] (vo) it's that time of year again.

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it's life care. >> jimmy: hi there, we are back. you know him from "conan" and a new game show on abc, "big fan," based on the segment we do here on our show. we got rid of me and replaced me with him. and the wonderful andy richter is here.

then a very funny guy, i saw him on jeff ross roast battle in montreal, asked him to come here. he walked, it took a really long time. k. trevor wilson is here to do standup comedy for us. [ cheers and applause ] tomorrow night mel gibson will be with us, from "the crown" clair foye, music from fantastic negrito. our first guest tonight is a beloved actor and filmmaker. he has a large shipping container full of oscars, emmys and golden globes. he'll be handing some out after the show. his new movie is "hidden fig figures" opening friday. please welcome kevin costner! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: how are you doing? >> good, man.

>> jimmy: good to see you. >> it is good to see you. >> jimmy: you give another award-worthy performance in this movie. like it's almost too many. [ cheers and applause ] >> i appreciate that. it was a story i didn't know anything about it. when it was all said and done, you know -- it was something reminded me like "a field of dreams." you don't feel these movies coming, all of a sudden they're out there. "hidden figures" is an untold story -- >> jimmy: a true story, amazing story. taraji p. henson was here last night talking about this story of these women who worked for nasa. you play a guy -- >> there was this moment -- we think we know the story of john glenn. like it would be a joke without a punch line, there's a moment where john won't go unless the math is done by somebody with a pencil and eraser. it's this young african-american woman was the difference to john glenn going or not going. >> jimmy: it's so crazy. and it's even crazier that we didn't know this story in the first place. there was a screening at the white house. when was that screening? last week? >> yeah, a couple of weeks ago. yeah, it just -- i also visited the african-american museum

there. if you get a chance -- >> jimmy: i heard that's great. >> it will break your heart into a thousand pieces but it's something you should get in line for. >> jimmy: this is a photograph, i need to ask you about this, it's you and president obama chatting. and there is octavia spencer losing her mind. what's going on? i thought at first this was a mirror. but it's obviously not. unless it's some crazy -- >> jimmy he's got the jacket off. >> jimmy: and he's also -- >> it's hollywood, special effects. >> jimmy: i don't know what's going on there, a picture of barack obama looking at himself in the mirror while you're looking at him there. >> yeah. he's an impressive guy. >> jimmy: he is an impressive guy. did you chat? did you get to know him at all? >> just a little bit. he was very aware of my career, very aware of things i'd done. he reads. >> have you met a lot of the presidents? >> i've spent some time with them. i met mr. clinton and -- you know, i spent a lot of time with

bush at one time. >> jimmy: which one? >> with george bush senior. >> jimmy: okay. >> i was making "jfk" and oliver and i probably were tired of each other, saturday night what are you going to do? i said, i'm not sure. he goes, i'm going to meet your buddy, see the white house, do a white house tour. i said, that's good, we need a break from each other. i had one of these days you'll never, ever -- basically i got an invite to play with orioles the next day. i thought to myself, well, i'll go take shortstop with cal. and his father, you know, pitched batting practice to me. i got one at memorial stadium. now go back in the locker room, shower. watch the game. and i get this call. it's the president. he says, you want to play golf? and i was like, gol, i was going to see -- somebody said, that's the president, he asked you to play golf, you've got to go play golf. i said, i don't have a car. he said, i'll shut the freeway down, somebody's going to come get you. it's true. the freeway shuts down, i don't get to play with the orioles, on the freeway going the wrong way,

in traffic -- talking on the phone, i don't have any shoes. what's your size? what do you want to eat? >> jimmy: you gave the president your lunch order? [ laughter ] >> i had to, he was asking me. i'm flying down the freeway, i got a little bold after i said tuna sandwich. and a brownie! i'd like a brownie! so, you know. we go to andrews air force base. he goes, we're waiting for you. i said, gee, the car can only go so fast. the press is on the 1st tee asking questions. andre agassi's playing. >> jimmy: he was golfing? >> yeah, it was -- they lacked somebody. kev. so i come up. i got the sandwich in my mouth. i'm hopping. they'd already hit. i tee off. it goes right. the secret service finds it with a bayonet. [ laughter ] true. we get to the 18th hole. george says to me, you know, if we win this hole, we can tie them. and i thought, no, we can't. we're not even close.

probably four holes behind. but okay. so we tied them. [ laughter ] so i had this pretty amazing day. now i'm about to go home. he goes, do you want to go to the white house? and i said, yeah. yeah. we get on the helicopter. we go across the potomac. the marines salute. we get off on the white house lawn. we go across. he pretends to not hear what they are saying. i'm thinking, okay, now the day's over. he says, want to play horseshoes? my pat answer, okay. we play, two out of three. now he's going to have dinner. andre was his guest, had a girlfriend, a pretty girl. and even the president commented. >> jimmy: oh, really. >> yeah. he said, pretty girl. i'm thinking my day's over. he goes, do you want to swim in the pool? and i said, by myself? he goes, yeah, we got all the stuff, all those t-shirts that come from the university. so i'm like swimming in the pool. and finally i go, i'm not sure about this. so i get out of the pool. i'm going away.

he says, do you want to have dinner? i said, yeah, fine, i'll have dinner. so i have dinner with him. politics is never brought up. getting in the car he says, i'm going to russia tomorrow, i'm going to work these guys over, gave me a five-minute thing about what he was going to do. very concise but never talked about politics at all. the next morning i'm thinking about my day, i'm in the trailer, oliver comes in, really grumpy. i go, what's the matter, oliver? he goes, you know, i went to the white house and they gave me the "b" tour, not even the "a" tour. the "b" tour. he's always upset about something. they gave me the "b" tour. he said, i didn't even get to see the pool because there was somebody in it! [ laughter ] [ applause ] and i never told him till now. >> jimmy: oh, wow. what a day you had with the president, that's better than "the bachelor." >> all day with him. >> jimmy: we're going to take a break. kevin costner's here, the new movie is "hidden figures." we'll be right back!

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how do you know about the atlas rocket? that's not math. that data's not here, like you said, it's classified. >> i held it up to the light. >> you held it up to the light? >> yes, sir. >> well, there it is. atlas. what's your name? >> katherine gobel. >> are you a spy? >> am i what? >> are you a russian spy? >> no, sir. i'm not russian. >> she's not russian, sir. >> jimmy: that's kevin costner in "hidden figures" which opens on friday. i will say, president bush was a little careless, some nerve

asking her if she's a russian spy when we've sen what you're up to, "no way out" in particular. in a movie like that, are you not playing a specific guy? >> no the only character we couldn't get the rights to. the women you're seeing are referred to as computers long before the computers we have. it's interesting. no, it was made up. i came to support the movie. i'm really happy to be a part of it. >> jimmy: you did a great job. is a movie like that, you've done so many movies where the fight scenes, the water, the buffalo and whatnot. is it a movie you go, thank god, i just really have to wear a white shirt and a tie and maybe a pair of glasses. >> yeah. i don't actually like wearing suits. i really despise it to be honest. i don't like playing lawyer movies but i've played them. i like westerns. >> jimmy: you like westerns, right. what about "bull durham"? would you ever do a sequel? [ cheers and applause ]

>> if lon shelter wrote it and we both saw it really clearly, i'd put myself in his hands. >> westerns. you should do like a western baseball movie would be an interesting one. >> right. and apple pie. nobody ever really mistakes me for being anything other than american when i go around the world. "he's american." >> jimmy: right, yeah. well, i think that's good. >> that's okay by me. >> right. they also know who you are, what the hell else are they going to think you are? when you were swimming with president bush, did you have trunks on? >> i was by myself. in the pool by myself. the security, the bodyguard guy was looking at me and i thought -- >> jimmy: he didn't go in? >> no, he and andre went into the white house. that's what i'm saying. that's why i'm thinking, why am i swimming out here? and oliver couldn't get in because some guy was swimming. >> jimmy: is it possible that you smelled and he wanted you to go in the water? >> yeah. >> jimmy: you never know.

well, this is some movie, some story. congratulations on the golden globe nominations you guys got and all that. >> thank you. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: kevin costner, see "hidden figures," it opens friday. be right back with andy richter! [ cheers and applause ] ♪

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>> jimmy: we are back. still to come, k. trevor wilson. you know our next guest from "conan," he sits right there with him. not tonight. we captured him and dragged him to abc. he is host of a new game show called "big fan." it premieres with back-to-back episodes starting monday night at 10:00. please say hello to andy richter! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: i like this, i like having you next to me. >> thank you, it's nice to be here. >> jimmy: it makes me feel like a real talk show host. >> that's right. get some backup. >> jimmy: does conan know you're here, is this going to be a problem? >> no, please don't tell anyone. i'm cheating on him. >> jimmy: everybody be very, very quiet. >> we've had -- we're still on break. we're still on hiatus. he's off somewhere as he usually

is on his time off. returning baby birds that have fallen out of the nest back to the nest. >> jimmy: that's so sweet. >> sounds good until you find out a butler knocks it out of the nest. >> jimmy: oh, no. >> in order for him to put it back in, yeah. he is a sick man. >> jimmy: tall people, that's the kind of thing they do. >> uh-huh. no, we had the week off. and we've got this game show to promote. >> jimmy: when you have a week off, how is that different from when you are working for the week? because your job seems to me like the best possible job. >> it's pretty great. it's pretty great. as i like to say, well, because it's california, i dress like a toddler anyway. but on my work weeks i don't have to put on shoes. >> jimmy: right, yeah. >> so it's like i'm a barefoot toddler. >> jimmy: being a sidekick on a talk show, some shows the sidekick doesn't even need to speak english. [ laughter ] >> i understand that. i understand that. >> jimmy: no offense over there. >> hi, guillermo. [ cheers and applause ] >> good to see you. i see him at the meetings, yeah. >> jimmy: what did you do over

the holidays? did you travel or anything? >> no, we pretty much stayed here. just, you know -- stayed here. trying to get my daughter to not open presents. >> jimmy: what do you mean? >> she just was pestering us from like december 19th. can't i open just one today? come on just one, just this little one. like no, no. >> jimmy: did you give in at all? >> no, they get one on christmas eve. the big one that she got, she got a new x-box. >> jimmy: oh. >> i thought we had an x box. but we -- so we had a new x box which just the setup for it was more complicated than my mortgage. just to sign into the thing. and she's got mine craft on it. which do my parents here mine craft? [ applause ] >> jimmy: kids love it. >> yeah it's like -- it's a

simple graphics thing. they build their own worlds and explore it. except she wants me to watch her do it. >> jimmy: do you watch her do it? >> no! i said on twitter, i love her very much but i guess i don't love her that much. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: does your wife? >> it is boring. >> jimmy: right. does your wife do it? will sarah do it? >> she is better at it. but she still is -- normally -- she goes upstairs when it starts. to know that like she's too far away. i'm busy! you know. >> jimmy: right. >> you know, she's watching something on her ipad. and i'm down there going like, yeah, that's great. oh, look, yeah, another horse. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i think in a way it sounds like it's maybe a bad parent but in a way you're actually a very good parent because like when i was your daughter's age -- i didn't want my parents anywhere around me. >> oh, no. >> jimmy: never mind watching me do mine craft, my kids insist --

maybe i'm good with kids because my kids -- i think it's something that children generally have is that -- and you have to -- i think a big part of fostering children is not letting them know how boring they are. [ laughter ] they are aggressively boring. a few years ago, it was just a few years ago but a friend of my son's, we were in the car, it was a long trip, going somewhere. and he told me the entire plot of the movie "rush hour" in question form. [ laughter ] and then the guy? the one guy? the guy that fell in the fountain? he said to the guy? not the guy with the gun but the other guy? he says to that guy? why did you push me in the -- wait, no, it was the other guy? [ laughter ] [ applause ] >> jimmy: i'm glad they didn't ask you to host a kids' show. >> yeah, no. >> jimmy: this game show we're talking about that premieres monday night on abc --

>> its genesis was here! on this show! >> jimmy: we started it on this show. the idea, we'll explain it. you know it. >> yeah. >> jimmy: hopefully you know it. >> it was on -- now we call it "big fan." on this show it was called "jimmy kimmel has too much access to famous people." >> jimmy: was that the title? >> that was the title, yeah, yeah. it's great -- you watch the reel before the show what do you have on these people? good lord. george clooney? i smelled him once, i never sat in a room with him. >> jimmy: he smells like heaven. >> must smell like clooney. no, the idea is it's a quiz show. kind of a classic sort of quiz game show, quiz show, between a super-celebrity and their super-fan. and the topic of the quiz is the celebrity. >> jimmy: yes. >> so the fan, the idea is the fan knows a lot more than the celebrity. >> jimmy: about the celebrity. >> about the celebrity, which is always fun. and i bet quite a shocker that

celebrities aren't really in possession of a lot of self-knowledge. [ laughter ] what a shocker, right? >> jimmy: you'd think they'd know everything. funny, some of them come off a little bit shaken. >> yeah. >> jimmy: it's like, where did you go to elementary school? bang! matthew mcconaughey is like, that was me in the elementary school, how do you know where i went to elementary school? we have a clip from kim kardashian on the show. kim kardashian west i should say. >> you should say that. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: this will give you a little sense, a sense of how the show goes. >> how many carats is kim's engagement ring from kanye? kim? >> 12. >> sorry, no. it's 15. we got the information from kanye. maybe he upped the number. >> jimmy: she did not know how many carats were in her ring, that's something every woman knows how many karats are in their ring. >> my wife would know because it's zero. [ laughter ] we were poor when we were

married. >> jimmy: no carats. >> a tiny picture of a carat. >> jimmy: i'm very glad you agreed to do this show. >> i was thrilled to do it. i think you e-mailed me on a wednesday and asked if i could do a game show on saturday. >> jimmy: that's right, that's right. >> which i've been in show business long enough to know, oh, i guess i'm the first choice! [ laughter ] [ applause ] >> jimmy: well, i have to be honest, fabio was our first choice to host. >> right, right. >> jimmy: he's very busy. >> that's another showbiz chestnut. if you can't get fabio, there's richter. [ laughter ] that's right, yeah. >> jimmy: where did we meet the first time? >> i think the first time that we actually met, we bumped into each other in a casino in las vegas. >> jimmy: las vegas, that's right, yeah. >> and chatted. but then where we actually spent the first amount of time together was -- i think maybe you were sort of in charge -- it was a scrabble charity tournament. >> jimmy: yes, a scrabble tournament to benefit st. jude's hospital, right.

>> yes, that's what it was. i just remember the scrabble. >> jimmy: okay. >> and i remember you -- like it was honestly -- it was like tiger woods going, how about a charity golf tournament? where i play with people that are on tv? like oh, look, i won! because you play a lot of scrabble. >> jimmy: well, yeah, i used to, i'm good at scrabble. it's the one thing i'm really good at. >> but you're the kind of scrabble person that it's [ bleep ]. >> jimmy: what do you mean? >> you have -- it's gimmick scrabble. it's you know the fact that like a, e, o is some kind of welsh shellfish. [ laughter ] so you're always like, oh, well, no one's getting to that triple word thing. and they're like, oh, a, e, o, yes, welsh shellfish. >> jimmy: you are very -- you're not so bad with games yourself. >> oh, yes. >> jimmy: this is a photograph that went around online for a while.

"celebrity jeopardy." wolf blitzer negative $4,600. dana delany, $4,800. you with $39,000. [ cheers and applause ] >> yeah, i'm -- this head is full of a lot of useless knowledge. >> jimmy: wolf should have been thrown off cnn for these numbers alone. correct? >> i took no pleasure in that. whatsoever. but on the internet -- the internet takes great pleasure in that. >> jimmy: i think we all do. in a way it's like you won for all of us. >> yeah, yeah. >> jimmy: the show is "big fan." it premieres monday night, 10:00 on abc. andy richter is the host. watch him on "conan" too. be right back with k. trevor wilson! the itsy bitsy spider went up the waterspout. down came the rain and clogged the gutter system creating a leak in the roof. luckily the spider recently had geico help him

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i'll tell you guys a bit about myself. i was born into an oddly religious family. and i use the term "oddly religious" because i was born a christian scientist. thank you. a lot of people confuse christian science with scientology. they are two very different religions. scientology is a religion that was started by science fiction author l. ron hubbard. and they practice under the belief that millions of years ago, aliens were dropped into volcanoes here on earth and now their spirits roam the planet causing bad things. [ laughter ] christian science is much much stupider. [ laughter ] christian science is a sect of christianity started by a woman named mary baker eddy and they practice under the belief that they don't have to go to the doctor or use medicine. they believe they can cure all illnesses through the healing power of prayer. so needless to say, most of my family is dead.

[ laughter ] turns out doctors are wicked important, please go see them. those diplomas were very hard to get. growing up i had a nickname. my nickname was "big trev." it was the most unnecessary nickname i've ever had, cuz i didn't have any other friends named trev. i was the only one. you didn't have to put a size disclaimer in front of my name. [ laughter ] you could just say "trev," i knew who you meant. i get it, i'm a weird-looking guy. i look like what would happen if "game of thrones" and "duck dynasty" had a baby. [ laughter ] [ applause ] thank you. no, i'm very aware of my appearance. i look like i recently quit a blues traveler cover band to join a mumford and sons cover band.

[ laughter ] i look like i have very strong opinions about the show "ice road truckers." [ laughter ] a lot of my friends tell me i look like a pro wrestler but not a good one. i look like the guys that used to lose every saturday afternoon wrestling. you might remember those guys. they were the ones who didn't have a theme song, or a nickname. they were just waiting there in the ring when they came back from a commercial break. [ laughter ] that's how you knew they were going to lose every week, they were already there. [ laughter ] they'd get the saddest introduction in wrestling, just "already in the ring, weighing in at 275 pounds from robins dale, minnesota -- scooooooooootttt!"

[ laughter ] [ applause ] you just knew. the next person coming through those curtains was kicking the crap outta scott. i'm a fat guy, it's what i am. and i say "fat" i'm not one of those fat guys who makes up fake terms to pretend he's not fat. like fluffy, or big-boned. you're not big-boned. do you have a big, round stomach? yeah that's not a bone. [ laughter ] no one on this planet has a round, squishy stomach bone, that's not a real thing. i have a round, squishy stomach and i'll tell you right now, this is not made out of bone. it's made out of beer and pudding. [ laughter ] i know that because i built it myself. [ laughter ] [ applause ]

you can't offend me with fat. i did this to me. i wasn't in a coma being force-fed cakes through a funnel. i was awake for every delicious morsel as i mashed it into my head. if i'm honest, i'm at my oldest and my fattest right now. i've apexed. i reached the peak. i am a bit surprised when i look back at my smallest, how far i let myself go. because at my smallest i was 8 pounds, 9 ounces. [ laughter ] i just don't see myself getting back to that size. thank you very much for having me, folks. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you very much, very funny. k. trevor wilson, everybody! we'll be right back. [ cheers and applause ] ♪

>> jimmy: we are back. k. trevor wilson, do people call you "k" or "big trev"? >> most people call me k-trev, i have kevin federline to thank for that.

>> jimmy: why did you add the "k"? was there another trevor wilson? >> when i joined the union there was another trevor wilson. >> jimmy: you can't just kill him? anything like that? >> i've never found him. >> jimmy: you'll find him if he's out there. >> the only thing i know he's done in his career is take my name. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: in a way it's like he's your wife. this is you -- you have a television show "letter kenny" on tv in canada. i love the title of your cd. "sex cop fire penis." k. trevor wilson. thank you, k-trev, kevin costner, and apologies to matt damon, we have run out of time for him, he will be rescheduled. "nightline" is next. thank you for watching. good night, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] ♪

this is "nightline." >> tonight, airport horror. >> shots fired, multiple down. >> chaos and bloodshed at a florida airport. a gunman opens fire in an unsecured baggage claim area, killing five before surrendering. >> they're shooting run, run, leave everything, go. >> you didn't know if you were going to get shot. >> harrowing accounts from witnesses escaped massacre, and what we're learning about the young military-trained suspect. elegant exit. michelle obama delivering her final speech as first lady. >> being your first lady has been the greatest honor of my life and i hope i've made you proud. >> a standard-bearer who broke all the rules, making herself and the white house accessible. >> can i sleep over in the