and music from bastille. and now, don't move, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you very much. hi there. jimmy cartery. i'm the host of the show. thanks for watching. thanks for coming. relax, relax. ace frehley is here. what's happening? hope you had a quick weekend. i want to tell you a story about my personal life.

my wife went a group of friend to the rose bowl to see a and jay-z. she loves beyonce more than she loves me. last time jay-z and beyonce were at the rose bowl i went with my wife and it was a great show. they sounded great. there were a lot of outfits which i love and everyone had fun, but that was two years ago. the world was different back then and because the world is different this time around when we got the tickets i thought i wonder if i should go to this, not that my wife asked me to go mind you. she did not. she was all the way -- she's planning to go with her sister and her friend. even if she had asked i was planning to not go and i'll tell you why. 2016, only two years ago, but it was a long two years ago. obama was our president, and at that point women still seemed to

be kind of okay with men. [ laughter ] this is before we had supreme court justices running with their [ bleep ] out. people were still chill with beyonce. 2006, beyonce was smashing in the windows of every car on the block, and if show was that mad then, i can only imagine what kind of arsenal of louisville sluggers she's stockpiling now. now, i'm of the opinion, and not that she would do it because she seems to be a very nice person, but i'm of the opinion that if anyone has the power to start a gender war it's beyonce. my wife would do literally anything beyonce commands her to do. there were 60,000 fans at the rose bowl last night, the majority of them female. if for whatever reason beyonce ever decided to say that's it, ladies, these men are animals. they are never going to change. i don't know about you, but i've had enough, get in formation.

[ laughter ] it's time to kill every single one of them. on the off chance that that happens, i don't want to be present, okay? because i know that when it comes to picking sides, my wife is on beyonce's side. i'm at the rose bowl dead, so i stayed home with the kids last night and safety first. that's what my uncle frank used to tell me. safety first. you have to think that stuff through, right, guillermo. >> that's right. >> jimmy: almost anyone. i don't know if you saw this. tiger woods made a big comeback this weekend. wow. [ applause ] and, boy, did he pick a perfect cultural moment to do it. hey, ladies. guess who is back on top. [ laughter ] tiger woods yesterday won his first pga tournament since 2013. he's been training hard. he's been golfing almost as much as the president has. [ laughter ] tiger, i think tiger had four back surgeries over the last few

years. he almost retired, but the problem with being a professional golfer is once you retire, what do you do all day? [ laughter ] you play golf, right? so he figured i might as well do that for money. remember though, remember when tiger woods was the creepiest famous guy we knew. that was a lot of hooters waitresses ago. [ laughter ] president trump is in new york right now. he's scheduled to address the u.n. general assembly tomorrow. his focus during these meetings will be america first. that's like his version of hulk smash, america first. while trump is busy making friends at the u.n., there's a much more drama surrounding his pick for the supreme court. another woman came forward to accuse brett kavanaugh of sexual misconduct. that makes two women. only 12 more he can one for president. according to a story in the "new yorker" yesterday when kavanaugh was at yale a foe mail got very party and he put his penis in her face. the republican leadership reportedly knew this second

round of accusations was coming and tried to push up the confirmation so it would happen before the story came out. kavanaugh himself doubled down on denials. he did an interview on fox news tonight in which he revealed a lot. >> i've never sexually assaulted anyone. i did not have sexual intercourse or anything close to sexual intercourse in high school or for many years thereafter, and the girls from the schools i went to and i were friend. >> so you're saying through all these years that are in question you were a virgin? >> that's correct. >> never had sexual intercourse with anyone in high school? >> correct. >> through what years in college since we're probing into your personal life? >> many years after. i'll leave it at that. >> wow. >> thank you for admitting that. he was a irgin until many years. so if he doesn't get to be on the supreme court, maybe he'll be the bachelor. they have a thing there.

on thursday judge kavanaugh and his first accuser professor christine blasey ford will both testify before the senate judiciary committee. professor ford claims kavanaugh tried to sexual assault her at a high school party. he claims he kept calendars detailing his social engagements from 1982 that will help to exonerate him. okay. what 17-year-old keeps calendars of his social engagements? no wonder he was a virgin. [ laughter ] in light of this new allegation president trump expressed no change in his view about kavanaugh. in fact, if anything, he likes him more. >> judge kavanaugh is an outstanding person, and i am with him all the way. we'll see how it goes with the senate. we'll see how it goes for the vote. i think it could be, a chance that this could be one of the single most unfair, unjust things to happen to a candidate for anything, but i am with judge kavanaugh, and i look forward to a vote, and for poem to come out of the woodwork from

36 years ago and 30 years ago and never mentioned it all of a sudden it happens, in my opinion it's totally political. >> jimmy: yeah, spoken like a man who has people coming out of the woodwork from 30 years ago. i think there's a compromise here. hear me out on this. so kavanaugh gets confirmed to the supreme court, okay. well, in return we get to cut that pesky penis of his off in front of everyone. no? that's not good. no? i thought i had a solution there for a minute. the president took his show on the road this weekend for a rally in springfield, missouri, and while trump was supposedly in town to stump for the mid terms he couldn't help but reminisce about his bigley version of his victory in 2016 in tonight's version of "drowning donald trump." >> and then they said -- wait a minute, oh, my

oh. trump, just won the state of florida, whoa, whoa. ♪ [ applause ] >> jimmy: the other major story line in washington today concerns the job security of deputy attorney general rod rosenstein. you know a lot of presidents might look at a week in which the supreme court nominee is being accused by multiple women of sexual assault and think it can't get any worse than this and that's where donald jessica trump shines. it can always get worse. the failing "new york times" last week reported rosenstein floated the idea of wearing a wire to record the president and possibly invoking the 25th amendment to have him removed from office. rosenstein said he never said or did either of those things, but he was summoned to the white house this morning to meet with chief of staff john kelly who did not surprisingly fire

rosenstein. instead, he and trump and rosenstein are going to meet on thursday. if ever there was a time to wear a wire, thursday is it, because i want to hear every bit of that. it would be very fishy if trump fires rosenstein because he's the guy overseeing the special counsel and the russia investigation and thursday is also the day of the kavanaugh testimony and some people believe trump might fire rosenstein just to change the news coverage that day and rosenstein from a career standpoint seems to always be preparing for this eventuality. >> tonight, a whole new season of dancing begins, live with an '80s icon, a ferocious footballer, a sitcom stud, and just at it soon to be discharged deputy attorney general rod "the bod" rosenstein. ♪ "dancing with the stars" season 9,742 premiers tonight on abc. >> jimmy: that's right. tonight on abc we enjoyed the

season premiere of another season of dancing stars. the mirror ballers this time around, judge schneider from "dukes of hazard," mary lou retton, tanashe and former football star demarcus ware. i pick a dancer who i believe will go all the way. i'm right about 50% of the time. my cousin sal and i put real money on this, so this afternoon i wrote the name of a dancing star on a tiny piece of paper which i placed inside a tiny briefcase which i then put into guillermo's tiny mouth where it has remained indisturbed for literally two minutes now, so guillermo, it's time to reveal my pick. who will win "dancing with the stars" this season? drum roll, please. the winner of "dancing with the stars" will be -- >> demarcus ware. >> jimmy: demarcus ware, former dallas cowboys demarcus ware will dance his way into the end

zone and that's why they call me nostradamus. this is good. no matter what your political persuasion, i think we can agree what i'm about to show you is the most creative political ad of this election cycle. there's a depthist running for re-election in rural arizona. his number is paul gosar. he's a hard-line right winker and prone to wild conspiracy theories, and he's also the target of an attack ad from a group of people who know him very well. >> paul gosar the congressman isn't doing anything to help rural america. >> paul is absolutely not working for his district. >> if he actually cared about people in rural arizona, i bet he'd be fighting for social security, for better access to health care. >> and he's not listening to you, and he doesn't have your interests at heart. >> my name is tim gasary. >> david gosar. >> joan gosar. >> gaston gosar. >> paul gosar is my brother. >> my brother. >> and i endorse dr. brill. >> dr. brill wholeheartedly.

>> endorse dr. david burrell for congress. >> holy [ bleep ]. >> i'm dr. david brill and i definitely approve this message. [ applause ] >> hey, steve harvey, get that family on the feud. i want to mention we will be packing up and taking off to brooklyn, new york, next month for our annual trip to the academy of music. go to kimmel.com and tickets are free. anyone who lives in new york or l.a. knows there's a rivalry between the cities when it comes to pretty much everything and it start at a young age so we decided it would be fun to ask kid in both cities, who was funnier, kids in new york or kid in l.a., and it wasn't just an opinion poll, we made the kid prove it, too. ♪ >> what do you think is funnier, kids in new york or l.a.? >> l.a. >> how come?

>> it's a fact. >> who is "fixer upper," kids in new york or kids in l.a.? >> new york. >> she's really funny. >> how come kids here are funnier? >> i don't know. just that new york sense of humor. >> yeah. >> can you tell us a joke. >> i love the "new yorker," it's really funny. >> what did the salad said to the refrigerator? >> what? >> close the door. i'm dressing. >> can you tell us a joke? >> yeah. >> what's beethoven's favorite fruit? >> i don't know. >> ba-na-na. >> can you tell us a joke? >> knock, knock. >> who's there in. >> banana who. >> banana who? >> banana in the toilet. >> i like it. >> let me tell you one joke. do you know what the guy who invented knock, knock, he won the nobel, get it, because there's no bell on the floor. >> why did the cookie go to the doctor in. >> why. >> because he felt crummy.

>> why didn't the $5 bill go to the prom? >> why not? >> because it was hanging out with the singles. [ laughter ] >> what did the coat say to the jacket? >> what? >> you sweater believe it. >> did you make that up yourself? >> yes. >> what did the cat say when it had to stay indoors? don't let me-out. me-out. >> knock, knock. >> who is there? >> i can tell it. >> cow. >> interrupting cow. >> who? >> moo! >> you did that wrong. let me do that. >> knock, knock. >> who's there? >> interrupting cow. >> interrupting cow who. >> moo! >> we'll call it a tie. thank you, kids. tonight on the show ace frehley is sitting in with the cletones, bastille and hasan minhaj is here, and we'll be right back with viola davis.

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this is how xfinity makes life. simple. easy. awesome. get started with xfinity internet and tv for just $34.99 a month for 12 months and customize by adding flexible channel packs. click, call or visit a store today. >> jimmy: that's ace frehley, sitting in with the cletones. his new album comes out october 19th. it's called "spaceman. "oh, and it's backwards. it's called "spaceman." that's better. i like -- it's better that way. also, i want to wish a happy birthday to a member of our audience. musetta is here. it's her 95th birthday celebrating. [ cheers and applause ] . happy birthday.

musetta said when i turn 95 years old, there's one thing i want to do, and it's to see ace frehley. happy birthday. all right. i've got a lot of stuff here on my desk. tonight, host of the forthcoming netflix show "patriot act with hasan minhaj," hasan minhaj is here with us tonight. [ applause ] then, their song is called "quarter past midnight," bastille from the mercedes-benz stage. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: tomorrow night, sofia vergara and david alan grier will join us. we'll have music from tyga featuring offset. and later this week, riz ahmed, brad garrett, jay ellis, with music from avril lavigne and t.i. featuring yo gotti. so please join us for all of that. [ applause ] >> jimmy: our first guest tonight is one of the most gifted and highly decorated actresses anywhere. she's won an oscar, an emmy and two tonys, but still no grammy, despite the fact she was named after a musical instrument.

she returns to abc thursday night with season five of "how to get away with murder." please welcome viola davis. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: how are you doing? you look fantastic. >> thank you. >> jimmy: how is your life going? everything all right? >> my life is beautiful. >> jimmy: is your daughter here with you tonight? >> my daughter is eating every bit of the food that you left out because you know you've got the best food, jimmy. >> jimmy: i remember you mentioned to me that she loved the snacks backstage. >> yes. jimmy kimmel's got the best food. >> jimmy: i don't have the best show, but i always have the best food. far more importantly we've got the best food. >> yes. >> jimmy: how old is she now? >> she's 8. just had her 8th birthday with

her wonder woman cake. >> jimmy: wonder woman. >> i call birthday parties my door mat party. >> jimmy: why? >> because you have to be the door mat, and my daughter had a friend who slept over that night. >> jimmy: one friend? >> one friend who was running around the house. they ran around the house, you know, tearing everything up and me running after them saying what are you doing? you know, and finally at 8:00, 8:30 they wanted some oodles of noodles. >> jimmy: oodles of noodles. >> my husband, i told him they want addles of noodles. my husband is a different generation. i always say i married george jefferson. they are like they can't have no damn oodles of noodles. it's 8:30 at night. they need to get their ass to bed and i said julius, and he said i don't want to hear it. ya'll need to go to bed, and so genesis just laid out i want some oodles of noodles. >> jimmy: oh, no. >> i've got to get -- an her friend who is a little bit of a feminist who has a single mom

said mrs. davis, that's why i'm glad my mother doesn't have a man in her life. [ applause ] if my mom says that i can have oodles of noodles, it would be her opinion that mattered. her opinion. so it was her and my daughter doubling up on me, i finally said i'm going to give you guys the oodles of noodles. you can have as much as you want. >> jimmy: wow. she really appealed to your independence. a smart kid. >> she sure did, and afterwards she said, mrs. davis, you are awesome. >> jimmy: maybe i'm nuts but what is addles of noodles? is that like a product? >> are you serious. >> jimmy: yeah, i'm serious. i'm italian. we don't allow oodles of noodles in our home. >> oodles of noodles, if you get a 12-pack of oodles of noodles and it costs about $2.99 and they account for about 12 meals. >> jimmy: is it in a canner how

does -- a can or how does it come out? >> it's in a plastic package. there's noodles and there's a pact of chick enpowder in the noodles, put it in the microwave or on the stove and let me tell you something. it's about 5,000 grams of sodium. >> jimmy: yeah. >> jimmy: it's like ramen, kind of? >> that's exactly what it's called, ramen noodles. let me tell you okay. that spam pig's feet, they are the food of the poor folk. >> jimmy: okay. >> like when i graduated from juilliard, when i graduated from juilliard, my meal for celebration was a can of pickled pig's feet and a little thing of ch ha m-pale. i remember that? i ate the hell out of the pig's feet and sucked every bit of

bone. >> jimmy: pig's feet and ch ha m-pale. you know, when steve mcqueen was wooing me. >> jimmy: the director. >> the movie is coming out november 16th, not that i'm promoting it. i'm promoting "how to get away with murder. "forget that i said that. [ applause ] because i grew up poor, anyone who wants to take me out for a free meal, i am game. as much money as i make right now, if you want to pay for a meal, i will be there. >> jimmy: you will go. >> he wooed me for taking me out to sushi. >> jimmy: did he know you were -- >> hell, no, he didn't know. >> and let me tell you something. i made that meeting as long as possible. oh, yeah, well, i don't know if i'm sold yet, so let's order some more of this -- this california roll, yellow tail. i had some of the eggplant, and then after a while, after like sucking it down, sucking it down and i was like, oh, this is so

great. this role was written for a caucasian actress and you're considering me? wait a minute. you want me to be -- do you want me to lose weight, and then i think i sucked down about ten more sushi rolls. yeah, yeah, yeah, maybe i'll consider lewising weight after that. >> jimmy: once the check comes, i'll lose weight. >> wow. just learned an astonishing amount of information about you. in fact, i need to reset and we'll take a break here. vialia davis is with her. her show is called "how to get away with murder." we'll be right back. we're coming back with more. ♪

[music begins to play: "like ♪sugait's like sh♪-an] it's like sugar ♪ so sweet ♪ ♪ good enough ♪ ♪ to e♪t ♪ yeah! ♪ ♪ like sugar, like sugar ♪ it's like sugar ♪ suga♪, so sweet ♪ ♪ good enough ♪ to e♪t

♪ yeah! ♪ ♪ back in the new york groove ♪ i'm back, back in the new york groove ♪

>> from this point on you will have no time for friends or family. instead, you wake up hating yourself for choosing this life but you'll get up anyway to win cases or lose and watch innocent people go to jail and then you'll drink to make yourself feel better or take pills or fantasize about going to sleep forever. that's the life you're choosing. brutal, mean, depressing,

ruthless, but that's what it costs to change the world. so who wants in? >> that's vial a davis on "how to get away with murder." it's like you're a cult leader there. are there still people -- >> no, i think analise is a great teacher. i don't care what anyone says. she's not a good role model. >> jimmy: no. >> but she's a great teacher. >> jimmy: in the classroom the lessons are solid. >> now you forget about the murders in the basements. >> jimmy: when we get to other rooms is where the problems arrive. >> absolutely. >> jimmy: are you enjoying doing this show still? >> yeah, i'm enjoying it. i mean, in this season they have a nice apartment for me. you know, i moved out of the like $2 a day apartment i was in, and now i've got a nice spread, and now i don't want any of those kids in my apartment. first season they were just

walking in at midnight, kill someone in my house and walk out. i said this door is locked. don't bring them in here. i don't want any man. i don't want any boots under the table. >> jimmy: wait a minute. >> nothing. >> jimmy: this is not a real apartment, right? like a couple of walls? >> let me tell you something, if you saw it -- if you saw it you'd be very protective of it. >> jimmy: is there a door, an actual door to get into it? >> there is an actual door with a lock. >> jimmy: there is? >> yeah, and now i actually lock it. there were people who come up to me in the street and say why do people just walk in your house like that? >> jimmy: you've also written a book, a children's book, or at least i hope it is. >> yes. >> jimmy: called "corduroy takes a bow." >> jimmy: this is like a classic character from our youth. >> yeah. >> jimmy: how did it come to be, a sequel or a reboot? >> it's a sequel, yeah. >> jimmy: a character that you had a particular affinity for?

>> oh, my god, because when i was 5 i would walk to the library by myself after school, stay there until it got dark and walk home, and i'll tell you why. >> jimmy: why? >> the number one reason other than the fact that i love books, the head librarian there would save half her lunch for me. >> jimmy: really, wow. >> and it was like feeding a dog. you know, they tell you not to feed the dog or the dog comes back, well i would come back for the food. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: wow. >> and i would stay right there at the counter. i would wait for it sometimes for 20, 30 minutes, i would just wait, and she would say you're waiting for my lunch, aren't you? >> jimmy: was she a very skinny librarian? >> no, she wasn't. >> jimmy: wow. >> but to me that was part of the intrigue into the library, and it was part of what made me feel accepted, that half a tuna fish sandwich. >> jimmy: yeah. >> and that half of brownie. >> jimmy: what a great thing for

her to do. >> and i would suck it down. >> jimmy: she shared the brownie. that's an act of love. tuna fish sandwich, okay, whatever, enjoy, but to share the brownie, i mean, that's very special. i hope -- do you know what became that have librarian? >> i do not. her name was denise, i know that. >> jimmy: we have a surprise for you. denies -- oh, no, we don't have a surprise for you. >> i was about to go -- >> jimmy: wouldn't that have been great. >> it would have been great. >> jimmy: oprah would have figured that out. there's the book called "court roy takes a bow." "how to get away with murder" returns thursday night at 10:00 on abc. viola davis, everyone. we'll be right back. ♪

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>> jimmy: i'm jimmy kimmel. glare mow, on the count of of three say your favorite thing about brooklyn. >> guillermo: pizza. >> jimmy: friendship. >> guillermo: oh, friendship.

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♪ >> jimmy: yeah, there you go. ace frehley sitting in with the cletones. bastille is on the way. our next guest is a former "daily show" correspondent and peabody award winner with a new show called

"patriot act with hasan minhaj." it premiers october 28th on netflix. please welcome hasan minhaj. ♪ [ applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: how is everything? it's great to have you here. >> thanks for having me, man. >> jimmy: heard you just had a baby. >> yeah. >> jimmy: congratulations. >> had a baby girl. >> jimmy: first one. >> baby girl, how. >> jimmy: how old is she? >> 6 months. >> jimmy: you're on a comedy tour? >> had to take some time away. >> jimmy: is that why you decided to embark on an nationwide tour? >> we had the baby, i'll take paternity leave and when should i tour. six months is the right time and now i'm in the middle of tour saying i should be home more. >> jimmy: but what are you going to do? >> we had a baby in our 30s. if you know, you know. that's like the real miracle.

not like sex ed in middle school, watch out, you can get pregnant anywhere. >> jimmy: was it difficult to have a child? >> we were trying, which is the nice way of being like -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: were you looking at the calendar and doing different things? >> the whole name of the game is ovulation. >> right. >> jimmy: they don't tell you that. you have to get ready for it like it's a nasa launch. in our house we had a calendar. there was a countdown. the hair on your neck has to be at 17 degrees, like three werewolves have to howl at the moon. >> jimmy: that i didn't know about. >> then your wife is like fire the muskets, and you have to hit the game winner, have to listen to "dense seato." >> jimmy: were you in the delivery room with your wife? >> yeah. i was there. i just have so many respect for

what my wife went through. she's a 5'2" indian woman and then she just walked into that delivery room and just turned into lebron. it was crazy. she went beast mode 5uz have, to don't you? >> well, i didn't expect -- she was up in the stirrups, when we get home, let's finish watching -- agh! agh! agh! it was so intense. it was like show nsfw. you know what that term means. >> jimmy: not safe for work. >> really. >> jimmy: you wouldn't want to do that for work for shower. as a father do you feel like you're doing a good job? are you -- >> i'm doing the best i can. >> jimmy: does she like say you did anything wrong in the delivery room, for instance? >> well, my thing was i had to call the gender in the room because we didn't know. it was a surprise. >> jimmy: i like that. >> we know everything. we know the uber is coming. let this be a surprise but the serious finale of pregnancy came

down to me, and so just like time wag slowing down. the baby popped out. i was like. what is it? and i was like so -- you know, it's a girl. it's a girl. thank you. >> jimmy: was it incumbent upon you to look to identify whether it was a boy or girl? >> yes. >> jimmy: nobody gave you the yes or no, because at that point things don't look like they usually look. >> no, everything is extremely slimy. >> jimmy: swollen and slimy. >> yeah, like, what? what is going on? and she never wants to talk about it, by the way. she's like you remember that day? >> she's like no. it's her vietnam, and -- and like, jimmy, if we can deliver babies, men, we would never stop talking about it. it would be a physical marvel. it would on espn every single night. [ laughter ] "sportscenter" top ten would be dudes delivering babies. you hear about lebron, he had 38-7-7 and denis had triplets.

turn it on it. would be like a whole thing. >> jimmy: i go to bathroom and have to tell everybody about it, yeah. okay. so now how long have you and your wife been together? >> we've been married four years. we're about to celebrate our anniversary. i've got to do something special because like when we met i was broke, before any of this stuff. >> jimmy: right. >> before "daily show" and all that stuff. she was a doctor and i was living off pizza hut commercials and living off open mikes. i remember i bought the ring. i was like we've got to get married. i've got to marry up. [ laughter ] so i bought the ring. my bank account is at 0.00 and i'm like you idiot. you have to propose. like -- you know how they see for like richer or poorer. no, proposals are for richer, okay? no one is ever getting down on one knee at appleby's saying will you marry me? no, it is, so i'm like where can i look like a baller on a budget. >> jimmy: where did you go.

>> www.groupon.com. tiffany had everyone has had a story for that. for me it almost ruined my life. adventures and i click on sunrise hot air balloon rides, purchase. that's fine. visa calls me, hello is this hasan minhaj, and they are like someone has stolen your credit card and decided to go on a sunrise hot air balloon ride. no, that person is me. they are like mr. saddam, does your wife know you have crippling debt? i'm like it is what it is, so, by the way, because i bought the whole thing on groupon, the only day that was available was a wednesday! you know, the best time to propose to your wife. >> jimmy: what time on a wednesday? >> sunrise. oh, yeah. it's early. >> you can only imagine, waking up to your significant other at 2:59 a.m., like, babe, get up.

>> jimmy: you didn't tell her where you're going. >> i'm like i have a surprise for you. she's in her pjs, we're in the car and i drive her to the middle of this field, and she's like are you going kill me, and i'm like no. there's a guy blog up a big blue balloon. doesn't make me feel any better. the guy sees us, and he's like hey, you the couple from groupon? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: great. >> no! like surely you're mistaken. and he's like any special announcement, my man, something that i can help you with? i'm like, no. just the casual hump day hot air balloon ride, my man. why don't you let me up in the sky and leave me alone but that's not how hot air balloon rides work. you get in the basket and he's right in you. i'm up in the sky, the most expensive thing i've ever held in my wife. and i'm like what if i pull it out and it's like -- >> jimmy: a terrible place. >> and if i open it, a bird is

like that's a shiny sorm, all this stuff is going through my head. >> jimmy: yeah. >> my wife is, like, hey, you're like freaking out. look, and the sun was risings. it really was beautiful, and we look in the distance and there's this other bright red hot air balloon, and there's another couple, they see us, they are like, hey, and we see them and we're like hey. we're in love, too. [ laughter ] the guy is like look down. i'm like, what? look down. we both look down, and then in the middle of the field this giant white blanket opens up, and it says jessica, will you marry me? >> oh, no. and bina is like oh, my god, that is the most romantic thing i have ever seen in my life. who would have thought of that? and i'm like groupon! we get back down, right, my parents are going to call us at 10:00. it's like 9:50. they knew, what's going on?

so, i'm like, hey, i've got another surprise for you. what, i've got to get back to you. i promise you this is going to be great. the minutes are counting down, 9:55, 9:56, where are we going? i'm taking you to breakfast. i take the first exit. i don't know what's oh. 9:59 a.m. as my phone is ringing the only thing open is appleby's and at 10:00 in the morning i get down on one knee i'm like bin ha, will you marry me, and she's like it is what it is. [ applause ] so i've got to make this one count. >> jimmy: yeah, you do. >> got to make this one count. >> jimmy: you have a lot going on in your life. >> yeah. >> jimmy: you've got the new show. real quickly, what's the idea of the show? >> the show is called "patriot act" on netflix. for those who don't know, patriot act was a very scary piece of legislation passed by the bush administration but this won't be scary, like a weekly

investigative comedy show. >> jimmy: congratulations on all these wonderful things that are happening to you and to the groupon organization as well. everybody. his show is called "patriot act" premiering october 28th on netflix. we'll be right back with bastille. ♪ >> dicky: the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is presented by mercedes-benz. the best or nothing.

>> dicky: the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is presented by mercedes-benz. the best or nothing. >> jimmy: i want to thank viola davis and hasaminhaj, apologies to matt damon. here with their single "quarter past midnight," bastille! ♪ ♪ it's a quarter past midnight as we cut through the city yeah yeah yeah ♪ ♪ the streets are getting restless good times bad decisions yeah yeah yeah ♪ ♪ it's a quarter past midnight and the sirens are mending some hearts ♪ ♪ but we're the losers on the back seat singing love will

tear us apart ♪ ♪ it's a quarter past midnight still we're fighting tomorrow ♪ ♪ it's a quarter past midnight and we're just getting going ooh ee ooh ee ooh ee ooh ♪ ♪ keep on running running through a red light like we're trying to burn the night away ♪ ♪ away ay ay ay ay ay ay oh away ay ay ay ay ay ay oh ♪ ♪ this is my favorite part oh help me piece it all together darling ♪ ♪ before it falls apart oh help me piece it all together ♪ ♪ it's a quarter past midnight and the speakers are blowing yeah yeah yeah ♪ ♪ we want the bodies on the billboards not the lives underneath them yeah yeah yeah ♪ ♪ and now we're crawling up the walls again and it's a quarter past twelve ♪ ♪ and you said we'd leave

this place in dust and fall from heaven straight through hell ♪ ♪ we never know what we have we never know what we have ooh ee ooh ee ooh ee ooh ♪ ♪ keep on running running through a red light like we're trying to burn the night away ♪ ♪ away ay ay ay ay ay ay oh away ay ay ay ay ay ay oh oh ♪ ♪ why are we always chasing after something like we're trying to throw our lives away ♪ ♪ away ay ay ay ay ay ay oh away ay ay ay ay ay ay oh ♪ ♪ this is my favorite part oh help me piece it all together darling ♪ ♪efe it falls apart oh help me piece it all together ♪ ♪ i can't remember i can't remember i can't remember i can't remember ♪

♪ it's a quarter past midnight and the secrets are flowing ♪ ♪ our lips are getting looser i don't know what i'm saying ♪ ♪ we never know what we have never know what i've had ♪ ♪ keep on running running through a red light like we're trying to burn the night away ♪ ♪ away ay ay ay ay ay ay oh away ay ay ay ay ay ay oh oh ♪ ♪ why are we always chasing after something like we're trying to throw our lives away ♪ ♪ away ay ay ay ay ay ay oh away ay ay ay ay ay ay oh ♪ ♪ this is my favorite part oh help me piece it all together darling ♪ ♪ before it falls apart oh help me piece it all together ♪ ♪

this the "nightline." >> tonight, speaking out. supreme court nominee brett kavanaugh in an unprecedented interview on fox news vows to keep fighting. >> i'm not going to let false accusations drive us out of this process. i'm not going anywhere. >> as new allegations of sexual misconduct emerge, women across the country denounce him. >> we believe professor ford. we believe anita hill. >> and republicans stand by their man. >> one of the single most unfair, unjust things to happen to a candidate for anything. >> judge kavanaugh will be voted on here on the senate floor. >> plus, comingor fwa .rd outrage in solidarity. >> we stand with you. >> tel