tv Jimmy Kimmel Live ABC January 21, 2019 11:35pm-12:37am PST
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everybody, larry beil. >> ama daetz. thanks for being this is an abc color presentation in dazzling red, white and blue. ♪ tonight it's "jimmy kimmel live": intermission accomplished halftime of president trump, will arnett, paul scheer, melissa alano, fred armisen, bobby moynihan, jeff ross, josh scad, leon bridges, aloe blacc, and guillermo. "jimmy kimmel live" intermission accomplished, a halftime tribute to trump, is brought to you by oceanic airlines. oceanic, flying to over 150
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[ bleep ] countries daily. look like araccoon. extra tight golf pants. when you putt, show that nut. here to make america laugh again, your native-born host jimmy kimmel! >> jimmy: thank you, and welcome. hello, my fellow americans. i am jimmy kimmel. i am triple red, white, blue to welcome you to our special show, "intermission accomplished," a halftime tribute to trump. here to celebrate the midway mark of donald trump's first term in office. [ laughter ] because let's be honest, this is a man who is far too humble to celebrate himself. [ laughter ] whether you are a democrat or a republican or even a canadian, i think we can all agree that dr.
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martin luther king jr. would be honored and thrilled to share this day with this special orange man. and what a night this is going to be. we are so honored to have so many members of trump's inner circle here in our studio audience tonight. all the way from washington, senator lindsey graham is here. [ cheers and applause ] trump's boys are with us. vane pence is here with mother. don't they look great. this is exciting. senator ted cruz brought his beard in all the way from texas. senate majority leader mitch mcconnell outside his shell. and newly appointed attorney general flavor flav. [ cheers and applause ] he knows what time it is. all the stars of politics are here. as we look back on the many ways our president has made this country great again, quick question for those in our studio audience, did any of you get attacked by an ms-13 caravan on your way to the show tonight?
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no? guess why? because donald jennifer trump. [ cheers and applause ] that's right this man knows how to get things done. you won't hear about it from the fake news media. you can boo here. the fake news media. [ booing ] the news media says donald trump hasn't achieved anything and that is just plain wrong. and i can prove that it's wrong with three words. the space force. that's right. [ cheers and applause ] the u.s. space force. i have no idea what it is but i love it. and that's not all. the list of his accomplishments are endless. more than 6,000 tweets in office. at least half of those with no misspellings at all. [ laughter ] more than 100 days on the golf course. keeping tabs on the environment. and let's not forget the election itself. donald trump got 62 million votes, second-most of any presidential candidate in 2016. [ cheers and applause ] he wins and he wins and then he
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goes out there and he wins some more. and how much do we pay him for all this winning? in the two years since he took office our president has taken zero dollars in salary and he's earned every penny of that. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] if this country, the united states of america, is a box of nuggets, donald trump is our dipping sauce. some people, though, don't get it. to all the lose hoarse call him our worst president ever, and that's what you are, losers, ask you this. would the worst president ever be able to get 3 doors down to play at his inauguration? [ laughter ] i don't think so. the story of donald trump is well known by now. he was born the son of a poor american flagmaker from brooklyn, new york. he received a small loan of a nickel from his father to op a fried chicken stand and single-handedly grew that business into a multi trillion dollar organization. after serving valiantly in vietnam without ever getting
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captured, trump returned from war a hero and married his childhood sweetheart, melania, who to this day is still the only woman he's ever had sex with. [ laughter ] he's a devoted family man. trump insisted on attending every one of don jr. and eric's little league games rars a boss donald was loved by employees are for paying promptly and his generous catch praise -- >> you're hired. >> but this man frump had so much more to give. he announced his candidacy for president, running on a platform of kindness, friendship, and compassion -- kfc. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] and the rest, as they say, is american history. we are so very lucky, we really are, to live in this time. our wonderful president has so much love to give. but you know what they say, you can't truly love another until you love yourself. and no one loves himself more than donald trump. [ laughter ] >> i'm smarter than they are. i'm richer than they are.
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i became president and they didn't. i'm really rich. i'm much richer than almost anybody. i am so smart. i am the smartest person. and one of the smartest people in the world. it's true. trust me, i'm like a smart person. i went to an ivy league school. i'm very highly educated. i know words. i have the best words. people would say i'm the super genius of all time. the super genius of all time. i'm a man of common sense. i'm a very stable genius. i make great deals. the doctor said, man, you have the blood pressure of a great, great athlete who's 20 years old. i can be more presidential than any president that's ever held this office. i'm really good at war, i love war. donald trump is maybe the best interview there is. the biggest ovations. society loves me. nobody builds walls better than me. nobody knows the system better than me. nobody knows politicians better than me. nobody knows it better than me.
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nobody has better toys than i do. nobody loves the bible more than i do. nobody is stronger on second amendment than me. i think i am actually humble. i think i'm much more humble than you would understand. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: so humble, so humble. you know, we are beaming to you tonight from our halftime headquarters in the heart of hollywood, california. but there are celebrations going on all over the world, including washington, d.c. our nation's capital, where thousands have gathered. there's a celebration in austin, texas, happening. even internationally. vancouver, british columbia is hosting a celebration. of course in detroit, the motor city, things are really happening there. pyongyang, north korea, they love him. and even bangkok, a city whose name never fails to make our president giggle. [ laughter ] at the white house tonight, team trump is take a well-deserved victory lap. there's a big party in progress. let's go there now.
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joining us live very satellite from pennsylvania avenue, say hello to kellyanne conway, the president's number one lady. ♪ for he's a jolly good potus >> jimmy: story to interrupt, hello, hi, jimmy. it's low iq libtard kimmel! >> jimmy: are you having a party with the shutdown? >> the shutdown get-down. we finished a delicious dinner of whoppers and flurries. >> jimmy: no chefs left in the white house? we don't need chefs in the white house, you know flake. we don't need chefs or janitors or toilets -- >> jimmy: no toilets? >> we've been peeing in michelle obama's vegetable garden. >> jimmy: oh, come on, now. >> george, get me a drink. >> jimmy: who is george? >> my husband george. >> jimmy: oh, yes, george. he's very outspoken against the president. >> not tonight he's not. >> jimmy: oh. wow, hi, george. >> mmphh!
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>> go back too your hole, you chubby little bitch. it's a second thing, george is a voracious and experimental lover. the president just fired up his tanning bed. get the back engenerator! >> jimmy: when do you think this shutdown will be over? kellyanne? >> we just lost power. let's get to it, bitches! >> jimmy: i don't know what's going on there but it looks like they're having fun. thank you for joining us, kellyanne. >> you're very welcome, nightie night! georgie, i'm coming! >> jimmy: right, that's terrifying. we are now on day 31 of donald trump's big beautiful government shutdown, and each night to fight back against the schumers and the pelosis we have been giving jobs here at the show to federal workers who aren't getting paid and our unpaid federal worker of the night tonight is karla braswell. hello, karla, thank you for coming. [ cheers and applause ]
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please explain to everyone, tell us what it is that you do for the government. >> i work for the national archives and records administration, archivist at the richard nixon presidential library and museum. >> jimmy: very good. [ cheers and applause ] what we would like you to do is to organize our presidential library. we've got all the books about trump right there on one bookshelf. and you can see it goes all the way from "art of the deal" to "full disclosure" by stormy daniels. that one has a great mushroom recipe. [ laughter ] if you would go ahead and do whatever you do, will you do it alphabetically? >> whatever you like, i can do alphabetically, i can do library of congress numbers, dewy decimal system. >> jimmy: yes, ducy sister mall system, time to put that back in the spotlight. [ cheers and applause ] we continue to look back fondly. we're lucky to have in our audience one of the most memorable personalities from the
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election in 2016. this is a man who set the world on fire with indecision and he joins us tonight, ladies and gentlemen, the one and only ken bone is here! [ cheers and applause ] wow. and ken? [ cheers and applause ] thank you for coming. it's great to have you here. how are you? >> it's great to be here, jim. >> jimmy: based on the look of your sweater i guess we now know who you ended up voting for. >> oh, no, this, no. i didn't vote for donald trump, no. >> jimmy: oh, really, you don't? >> yeah, no. i got panicked. and i wrote in a vote for papa john. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: oh. >> that ended up being a big mistake. >> jimmy: yes, it did, i guess so. >> yeah. but i'll tell you who i'm going to vote for in 2020, the greatest president of all-time, donald j. president trump, huzzah! >> jimmy: excellent choice. what makes you sure about trump this time around? >> oh, well i owe trump
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everything, don't i, jimmy? i'm a celebrity now. people recognize me on the street. they buy me sweaters. >> jimmy: oh. >> yeah, i was even offered to play a pedophile on "svu." [ laughter ] >> jimmy: oh. >> to act opposite my favorite cold beverage, ice t. >> jimmy: oh, well that all sounds like a lot of fun, but it also seems like that stuff has more to do with the fact that you are an interesting character and very little to do with president trump. >> well, hold the bone. [ laughter ] are you saying -- that people love me because of me? >> jimmy: yeah, i guess that is what i'm saying, yeah. >> well, that changes everything, jim. >> jimmy: does it change who you're planning to vote for next time? >> yeah, it sure [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you? >> yeah. [ cheers and applause ] yeah! >> jimmy: you're going to run for president? >> hell yeah i'm going to run
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for president! it's time to make america bone again! [ laughter ] maba! >> jimmy: okay, i think -- i like the sentiment, i think the slogan itself might need a little bit of work, though. >> well, how about -- how about, hey, america, prepare to get boned? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: well, no. i'd say absolutely not that one. >> okay, what about this guy, feel the bone? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: it's a little much. some people -- needs to be a little -- maybe something more -- yeah. >> okay, what about, yes, we ken? >> jimmy: that's better. ken, i have to move on. we've got a big show planned -- >> perfect, i've got to move on too, i've got to start campaigning. >> jimmy: okay, thank you, ken. [ cheers and applause ] thanks so much for coming. >> thank you. >> jimmy: really great to have you here. >> thank you so much. hey, america! you've got a bone to pick! [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i like that. that's the one. [ cheers and applause ]
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>> yes, we ken! >> jimmy: ken bone, everybody. time to cut loose, have some fun. literally singing the president's praises. all the way from salt lake city, utah, a group of enthusiastic young people ready to make america groove again with a musical salute to our commander in chief. please welcome up with trump! ♪ ♪ ♪ mister tan man send me a tweet from your official white house toilet seat ♪ ♪ make it in all caps and add exclamations then send it out across this whole great nation ♪ ♪ tan man t ltighta meme conspiracy scheme ♪ ♪ fox news
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coverage's guaranteed mr tan man send me a tweet ♪ ♪ ♪ ooh my little pretty one you're set to "stun" tell me how'd you get so damn fine, ivanka ♪ ♪ ooh you make a golf cart run like air force one 'cause you're in your ♪ ♪ physical prime, ivanka oh you're extra hot like a bucket of kfc love you even more ♪ ♪ than my sons or tifny oh my, my, my aye-aye, whoo ♪ ♪ m-m-m-my ivanka ♪ ♪ ♪ the power of trump is a curious thing makes the snowflakes weep ♪ ♪ makes the maga hats singbiglys
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pulled us out of a slump ♪ ♪ and now we're great again that's the power of trump tough as a trump steak cool like ice ♪ ♪ smarter and richer than the lord jesus christ with hair so golden teeth so bright ♪ ♪ power of trump will keep this country white he's got hotels ♪ ♪ private planes black credit cards a massive brain he's strong ♪ ♪ and he's stable and he's cruel sometimes and he's married three different wives ♪ ♪ that's the power of trump ♪ feel the power that's the power of trump ♪ ♪ that's the power of trump feel
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the power of trump ♪ ♪ feel the power of trump ♪ feel the power of trump ♪ feel the power of trump [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: wow. that's -- please. how about that. up for trump, everybody. take a bow, that was sensational. wow. [ cheers and applause ] aren't they terrific? what a show so far. and we've got so much more to come on an intermission accomplished, a halftime tribute to trump. stick around, we'll be right back. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ they've got a chance to win this with a field goal. time, give me time... wait, there's a time out. they're gonna ice the kicker! [pop-top can opening] [pop-top cans opening]
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what is going on?! i don't know! [fans gulping and drinking] i've never seen anything like this in my life. hike! the snap is good... ...threads are up... ahhhh... ahhhhh... ahhhhhh... ahhhhhhh... ahhhhhhhh... ahhhhhhhhh... ahhhhhhhhhh... ahhhhhhhhhhh... [clang] they got to him! doh!! oh! i don't believe it! can you believe it?! ♪ dad! hiding when i was supposed to be quitting. i thought, i should try something that works. i should try nicorette. nicorette mini relieves sudden cravings fast.
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[ cheers and applause ] ♪ ah, another beautiful day here on mt. rushmore. let's do our presidential roll call, shall we? washington? >> here! [ cheers and applause ] >> jefferson? >> present. [ cheers and applause ] >> roosevelt. >> but i -- eph -- what is infernal racket? >> they're adding another head to mt. rushmore. >> who could it somebody. >> watch it jose, that hair the made of 24-karat gold. i had to melt down all my toilets to live that. >> welcome, newcomer. and who might you somebody.
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>> are you serious? i'm the 45th and best president of the united states, donald jesus trump. >> a new president, well, let me be the first to say, south dakota is honored to have you. >> i love the dakotas. south dakota, east dakota, dakota johnson, dakota fanning. i know them well, fantastic people, so great. >> well, if you've been added to mt. rushmore you enough accomplished something amazing during your presidency r. for instance, i gave the gettysburg address. fourscore and seven years ago -- >> big deal. i score all the time. >> hm. well, i also ended slavery. >> that's not true. i've been making a bunch of federal employees work for free for 31 days. >> oh. >> well, in my presidency we finished the panama canal.
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panama! >> great song, filthy place. and who cares about a frickin' canal? i build golden towers with my name on them. and we have taco bowls. >> well, i wrote the declaration of independence. >> never heard of her. >> i was america's first president. that's why i'm on the one dollar bill. >> you mean that money poor people use at strip clubs? wow, i'm so impressed. listen, losers. this place sucks. so i'm going to take it from dump to trump. >> what ever do you mean? >> first of all, goofy george, i'm making that old wig you wear an oil rig, you like it? >> no, i cannot tell a lie. >> i don't have that problem. tiny tommy, tiny tommy, the dirty nose of yours is now a big beautiful water slide. >> this is highly unorthodox!
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>> woe, mm, daddy likee! and you, fatty boom boom? >> theodore roosevelt! >> whatever. i made your moustache a landing pad for the space force. >> oh, oh, it tickles! i hate it. >> and i have a special surprise for you, honest abe-hole. >> fore! >> what was that? >> a golf ball. this whole place is now a trump luxury golf course and you are 4 under par, kim jong. look at his little rocket dance, it's so adorable, i love you. >> president trump, with all due hto d in this way re honors thn would be a slap in the face to both democracy and the proudness of america itself! tweeting tha
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lama looks like a potato. >> mr. trump, we're going to have to ask that you leave mt. rushmore this instant! >> well, you can't. because it's no longer called mt. rushmore. it's called mt. russia. mt. russia! that's what those hookers in the hotel let me do. >> fore! >> my goodness. >> wow, nice shot, o.j. >> this is just ridiculous. totally real and very awesome. join the fight against the universe. be a >> space force! it's really great, it really is.
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and i did make it. thank you is, is nowhere near enough. ♪ served in a no-mess bag, my new deli trio and turkey, bacon, and cheddar pannidos are almost too easy to eat on the go. so panni-do eat one while you are in a car, but panni-don't, while you are on a car. order a pannido with doordash today. only at jack in the box.
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introdeli trio and turkey, bacon, and cheddar pannidos, both on toasted ciabatta bread. served in a no-mess bag, they're the ultimate on the go subs. so panni-do eat one while you are tackling errands. but panni-don't... huh? [buzzer] ...while you're getting tackled by a guy named aaron. order a pannido with doordash today. >> jimmy: welcome back to our halftime tribute to trump. as we celebrate the president's many deeds over the past two years, let us also reflect on his power of speech.
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this president has delivered so many poignant words, the bet words since he took office. donald trump has tweeted more than every other president in history combined. more than washington, more than lincoln even. and tonight we remember his most memorable lines. here now to set the historic tweets of our president to music, please welcome the great grammy nominee leon bridges. ♪ ♪ democrats can't find a smocking gun tying the trump campaign to russia after james comey's testimony ♪ ♪ no smocking gun no collusion ♪ [ cheers and applause ] ♪ great being with
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the national champion clemson tigers last night at the white house ♪ ♪ because of the shutdown i served them massive amounts of fast food ♪ ♪ i paid over 1000 hamberders ♪ ♪ but then it was all gone great guys and big eaters ♪ ♪ hamberders mm ♪ witch hunt! a total witch hunt this is the single greatest witch hunt of a ♪ ♪ in american history [ cheers and applause ] ♪ congratulations to
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rex tillerson on being sworn in as our new ♪ ♪ secretary of state he will be a star! ♪ and nine months later -- ♪ ♪ rex tillerson didn't have the mental capacity needed he was dumb as a rock and i couldn't get rid ♪ ♪ of him fast enough he was lazy as hell ♪ [ cheers and applause ] ♪ space force all the way! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: wow.
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great job. thank you, leon. thank you very much. leon bridges, everybody! our presidential salute continues when we return! >> announcer: "jimmy kimmel live," intermission accomplished, a halftime tribute to trump, brought to you by clean-burning coal. coal, the fuel of tomorrow, keeps america's great businesses humming. don't be a chump, buy a lump. coal, energy to burn. (clicking, beep) i'm dying. oh, we're dying. if you can hear us, honey, your father and i are dying. i'm dying. i'm dying. i'm dying! does anyone have a charger? yeah, just... down here. (grunting) sorry, i'm dying. i'm dying. ( ♪ )
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we travel now to the plains of africa where our brave sons, eric and donald jr., embark on the quest to find theerrefectde. [ choin them now. >> here we are in africa, eric. >> that's right, donald jr. what a [ bleep ] hole country. [ laughter ] >> oh, geez, eric, stop it. africa's not a [ bleep ] hole country, it's a [ bleep ] hole continent. [ laughter ] >> well, whatever it is, let's go home. >> first we got to go and do
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what we came here for. we came to kill the last lion in existence. >> oho, oh man, i can't wait to make my half into a new wig for daddy! [ laughter ] >> great idea. i'll use my half for that too! [ laughter ] but finding the last lion won't be easy. it will take patience and wits and determination and -- >> roar! [ cheers and applause ] >> thanks. roar! i'm the last lion in africa! >> quiet, lion, we're trying to use our wits and determination. [ laughter ] >> eric, stop talking and kill it. >> wait, wait, guys. hakuna may talked de, have you ever heard of that? >> great, now it's speaking muslim. [ laughter ] >> it's an isis lion, shoot it!
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>> no, no, no, you can't shoot me. >> why not? >> it's illegal. i'm an endangered species. >> breaking news, in executive order pump has legalized all killing of everything. >> oh, well that's fake news is what that is! that's the old fake news, right, guys? >> yeah. we are too stupid to know. >> oh. [ laughter ] wait, there's so much i haven't had a chance to do, i never got a chance to find a mate, to settle down for life. >> our dad never did that either. >> and i never got a chance to have sons that i could be proud of. >> our dad never got a chance to do that either. >> and i'll never get to have sex with a porno star. >> our dad never -- >> actually -- he did that one. [ laughter ] >> huh. you know? maybe we're not so different after all. >> that's right. we should be friends.
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>> friends? what's friends? >> our grandpa's name was fred. >> not freds. friends. friends. they're like butlers that you don't have to pay. >> wait what are you talking about? someone who actually wants to spend time with you? >> that you don't have to pay? >> right. friends are the kind of folks who share your interests. like me. >> whoa! >> great! you support daddy? >> uh-huh. but everything he st has a negative impact on your life. >> when has that ever stopped anyone from supporting donald trump? [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> you got a point, lion. let's do this. any last words? >> oh, well -- um -- yes. make sure you hang my head somewhere classy. >> got it. buffalo wild wings!
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history commemorative plates. >> i'm alyssa milano. you will be the envy of family and friends thanks to these priceless works of art highlighting all of our president's most unforgettable moments. relive all the glory. when our president triumphantly ascends the stairs of air force one with toilet paper on his shoe. trump and vladimir putin's first kiss. feel the president looking directly at the sun during a solar eclipse. and everyone's favorite, our president proudly posing with hundreds of hamburgers. these masterpieces are crafted in fine endenned african elephant tusk and richly accented with the same 22-karat gold trim used on the president's commode. but like members of the trump administration, this offer won't last. make these incredible keepsakes yours for seven easy payments of only $29.98. if you call in the next four
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seconds, you'll receive the sean spicer pizza slicer absolutely free. do the right thing. pick up a jitterbug phone and call now. >> have your credit card and call 800-720-0622. you won't regret it. no funds no fatties. operators are sitting by, call now. >> available at walgreens. >> jimmy: thank you, alisa and walgreen. we have yet another surprise for you and this one comes to us live via satellite from his office in washington. our great secretary of housing and urban development, please say hello to dr. ben carson who is standing by watching the show tonight. [ cheers and applause ] dr. carson? dr. carson? all right, i guess we'll check back in with him later, poor guy's all tuckered out, you know. it's been a long two years. anyway, we have yet another special guest who is coming to us from, well, listen. without this next guest, we wouldn't even have this president of the united states.
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and here now, straight from the bowels of hell itself, please welcome donald trump's father, fred trump. fred trump! fred, how are you? [ cheers and applause ] thank you for joining us. >> not a problem. i was just playing bochy down here with christopher columbus and that dirty italian cheats worse than he navigates to india. >> jimmy: i have to say i'm surprised they have bocce in hell. >> that's all we have, lawn sports and canker sores. word from below is you're honoring my boy. >> jimmy: that is right, celebrating two years in office. >> you're giving credit to the wrong trump. >> jimmy: really, how's that? >> you should be paying tribute to me. everything donald accomplished, every single thing he's done, is because of fred trump. if i had hugged that pudgy little turd even once during his
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childhood, none of this would ever have happened. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: fred why were you so emotionally withholding? >> why? what do you mean why? >> jimmy: why? you try loving donald trump. go ahead. picture his face. [ laughter ] do you feel love? >> jimmy: no, no. but he's not my son. >> oh how i wish i could say those words and make them true. >> jimmy: oh, come on, fred. [ laughter ] so you credit his presidency to the fact that you didn't show him any affection? >> all i'm saying is if i hadn't built an emotional wall, maybe he wouldn't be so obsessed with building a real one. how's that for some oprah [ bleep ]? [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: it's powerful. but hasn't he -- >> what, what? >> jimmy: hasn't he done anything that's made you even a little bit proud? >> yes, he has. >> jimmy: okay. >> remember when he told that
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7-year-old that santa claus wasn't real? >> jimmy: yes, i do. >> i loved that. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: well. >> that was incredible. >> jimmy: okay. >> christopher and i had a good laugh. >> jimmy: all right. >> he was also pretty good in "home alone 2." >> jimmy: okay. >> it's the only movie we have down here. >> jimmy: oh, that is -- that's tough. i'm sorry to hear. >> that's what you get for being a racist. >> jimmy: all right, okay. anyway. i got to vamoos eliminate. carol channing is about to sing. >> jimmy: what, carol channing? >> yeah, she really puts the hell in hello dolly. >> jimmy: i bet she does. i won't keep you. thank you so much for joining us, fred, mr. fred trump, everybody. >> wait, wait, jimmy, i'm actually thinking of changing my last name. >> jimmy: what? >> i don't love the association anymore. how does fred cosby sound? [ audience moaning ] >> jimmy: sounds great. take care, mr. cosby. >> i've been watching you,
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jimbo, see you down here real soon. >> jimmy: oh, great, all right. fred trump cosby. [ cheers and applause ] when we come back, our halftime tribute to trump concludes with a very special performance from aloe blacc, so please join us. >> announcer: "jimmy kimmel live," intermission accomplished, a halftime tribute to trump, is brought to you by teeth. teeth, we come in all shapes and sizes, like blinding white, pointy, even golden brown. teeth, the bones of the mouth. from the people who brought you nails.
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or been here. i bet you haven't met her, or him, or them. ooo, dance-off! this is... incredible. you, see what i did right there. and when is the last time you felt like this, or that or (sighs deeply) i mean, come on- that's basically a perfect moment. it's time to make some magic for as low as $70 per person, per day. >> jimmy: welcome back. it's been quite a night. we have something very special before we sign off. it is one thing to say we're great again, it is another thing entirely to sing it. here now to wrap this tribute up with our new national anthem, please welcome grammy nominee aloe blacc! [ cheers and applause ] ♪
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♪ it's donald trump's america in the u-s-fn' a where eagles fly in your apple pie ♪ ♪ on independence day where the children all say "christmas" and the men don't take a knee ♪ ♪ and the women let you grab 'em by the word that starts with "p" great again yeah ♪ ♪ we're great again we'll vanquish all our enemies like france and cnn great again ♪ ♪ don't make me say it again so suck it other countries 'cause we're great again when we needed a hero ♪ ♪ one man would heed the call with two yuge hands to lift us up and something else ♪ ♪ that isn't small two thumbs that
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tweet out justice ♪ ♪ hair like freedom's flame a very stable genius and donald trump's his name he's bringing us together ♪ ♪ united we must stand as long as you're a straight white christian fox news watching man ♪ ♪ so all you liberal snowflakes listen hard and listen good it's morning in america ♪ ♪ and trump's got morning wood great again we're making it ♪ ♪ great again we'll build a wall of solid gold to keep our greatness in ♪ ♪ great again like 1858 again donald trump's america has made us great again ♪ ♪
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[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: wow, wow. you see that, guillermo? i told you that something was great. thank you, aloe blacc. aloe blacc, everybody! that's our show. i want to thank all our wonderful celebrity guests tonight and also our noncelebrity guests. what an incredible program. apologies to matt damon. congratulations, mr. president, here's to another long and calamitous two years. thanks for the memories. good night, america! ♪ ♪
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this is "nightline." >> tonight -- >> i witnessed her take her last breath in front of me. >> deadly delivery reserve inside an american epidemic. new mothers dying at an alarming rate. inside the race from the hospital to the home. the team searching for answers and saving lives. and the famous faces sounding the alarm. plus the bachelor tests new waters with its first virgin star. >> i have not dated a virgin since i was 12. fore inf the ntered show world. but first the "nightline 5."
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