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tv   Jimmy Kimmel Live  ABC  January 25, 2019 11:35pm-12:37am PST

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ama has big plans to watch the show. i'm larry beil. >> i'm ama daetz. >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- anne hathaway, "the bachelor" colton underwood, and music from jacob banks. and now, for good measure, jimmy kimmel! ♪ >> jimmy: thank you, thank you. welcome. very nice. thanks for watching. thank you for coming. thanks for those of you in our studio audience for braving the elements to be here. i got to tell you, folks, something is happening right now that doesn't happen in los
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angeles much. it's raining. our chihuahuas are clinging to yoga mats for dear life. it is just short of a disaster. and of course, it rains the day after i get a blowout. it's also the first day of a teacher strike here in l.a. the teachers had to picket out in the storm. and on top of that, the government is -- what a mess we're in. the nearly 800,000 government workers are still without pay. this is now the longest shutdown ever, day 24. and every night we're doing a little something. we're giving a job every night to a federal employee whose going without a paycheck. we did this last week. and tonight our federal employee is a safety inspector from the usda named sandy cross. let's say hello to sandy. >> hi! >> sandy, tell me, what do you inspect? what is it you inspect? >> i inspect meat, poultry, and some egg items. >> jimmy: so is it safe without you we cannot trust our bacon or our eggs? >> exactly, jimmy.
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you couldn't. >> jimmy: and sandy is supporting four kids without a check. tonight since it's raining, we got you a slicker and asked you to be our weather person. you do inspect meat, right? >> yes. >> jimmy: in a way that makes you a meteorologist. >> i guess. >> jimmy: we'll wait as you get outside there. there you go. part of being a weather person is getting right to the scene. all right. it's time for weather. let's go live now to sandy cross, our meteorologist who is out on hollywood boulevard. that's right. hi, sandy. how's it looking out there? >> it's raining, jimmy. >> jimmy: all right. that's sandy cross. we'll check back in with sandy for more up-to-the-minute weather. you know, i mentioned this, the
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longest government shutdown of all time. the president says it will not end until he gets his wall. donald trump has now shut down, we added it up today. three casinos, an airline, a football league, a university, a magazine, a steak company, a vodka company, a travel website, and the government of the united states. is anyone else tired of winning yet? because i'm not. the president was holed up in the white house all weekend, binge watching cable news and tweeting up spray tan storm. among many things he with wrote "i just watched a fake reporter from the amazon "washington post" say the white house is chaotic. there does not seem to be a strategy for this shutdown. there is no plan. the fakes always like talking chaos. there is no plan. in fact, there is nobody in the white house but me. a terrifying thought. he is running the country or rebooting the home alone franchise? he also reiterated the wall was a campaign promise, and elections have consequences. no kidding!
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he is the you broke it, you bought it of presidents. but he is desperately trying to pin this shutdown on democrats right now, even though, i remember a time all the way back in, oh, was it december of the year of december of 2018 when a man who looked exactly like him told a room full of reporters i am proud to shut down the government. well, it turns out our president wasn't telling the truth. i know. i'm sorry to be the one to break this to you. but trump says schumer and pelosi could end the shutdown in 15 minutes if they just give in to all his demands. and if they act now, he is even willing to throw in naming rights. >> this is where i ask the democrats to come back to washington and to vote for money for the wall, the barrier, whatever you want to call it is okay with me. they can name it whatever they name it. peaches. i don't care what they name it. >> jimmy: isn't that interesting? peaches. because last week he used the
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phrase peachy-dory. he seems to have the word peach on his mind. hmm. i wonder why that is. maybe put an m in front of it and we can figure it out. the president is fighting back against two bombshell reports. according to "the new york times," after trump fired jim comey, the fbi launched an investigation into whether he was working for russia, and then "the washington post" published a story that claims the president has gone to extraordinary lengths to hide what was said during his private meetings with putin. they say trump took the notes from his interpreter and told the interpreter not to discuss what had been said with anyone in his own administration. that's not normal. i mean, usually when trump wants to keep someone quiet, he pays them $130,000. kellyanne conway today, basically he confirmed this report. she said trump wanted to keep the meeting quiet to avoid leaks. and this morning the president took to the white house lawn to do what no president has ever done, to declare that he is not an agent of the russian
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government. >> i never worked for russia, and you know that answer better than anybody. i never worked for russia. not only did i never work for russia, i think it's a disgrace that you even ask that question because it's a whole big fat hoax. >> big fat hoax is his secret service code name, by the way. but he is right, though. the question is insulting. of course he is not working for russia. he is being blackmailed by russia. there is a difference. he isn't guilty. he just always says and does things a super guilty person would do. on saturday, he tweeted i have been far tougher on russia than obama, bush or clinton. maybe tougher than any other president. at the same time, and as i've often said, getting along with russia is a good thing, not a bad thing. i fully expect that some day we will have good relations with russia again that is true. he has often said that getting along with russia is a good thing, not a bad thing. in fact, he says it all the time. >> getting along with russia, getting along with these countries is a good thing. it's not a bad thing. >> if we had a relationship with
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russia, that would be a good thing, not a bad thing. >> if we have a good relationship with russia, believe me, that's a good thing, not a bad thing. >> if i get along with vladimir putin, that's a good thing, folks, not a bad thing. >> getting along with russia is a good thing, not a bad thing. >> it's a good thing, not a bad thing, by the way. >> getting along is a good thing, not a bad thing. >> that's a good thing, by the way, not a bad thing. >> that's a good thing, not a bad thing. >> that's a good thing, not a bad thing. >> that's a good thing, not a bad thing. >> that was a good thing, not a bad thing. >> that's a good thing, not a bad thing. >> it's a good thing, not a bad thing. >> getting along with russia would be a good thing, not a bad thing. and just about everybody agrees to that, except very stupid people. >> jimmy: this good thing really has turned into a witch-hunt, as in which hunt are you talking about? the collusion, the obstruction, the treason and the corruption
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or the tax evasion? there a lot of hunts going on right now. how much hunts could a witch-hunt hunt if a witch-hunt did hunt -- i have to work out the end, but you get the idea. by the way, of all the crazy things trump said and did over the week, this might be the craziest. >> the clemson championship team, the national championship team will be coming tonight. it will be exciting. very great team. an unbelievable team. they'll be coming tonight, and i think we're going to serve mcdonald's, wendy's and burger king's with some pizza. i really mean it. it will be interesting. and i would think that's their favorite food. >> jimmy: why would you think -- what would possibly make you think that? i'll tell you what made him think that. so sarah sanders' office after he made that statement said because of the shutdown, much of the resident staff at the white house is furloughed. so the president is personally paying for the event to be catered with some of everyone's favorite. in other words, he is paying the check. so he had to get the cheapest food they could find. >> what's your favorite thing here, mr. president? >> i like it all. i like it all. it's all good stuff.
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great american food. >> do you prefer mcdonald's or wendy's? >> like them all. >> jimmy: wait a minute. how did tmz get into the white house? and you know he is taking whatever they don't eat back to his bedroom. tonight he'll be like the rat in "charlotte's web" tonight rolling around with quarter pounders with cheese. in other reality news, "the bachelor" colton underwood is here tonight. this is exciting. tonight colton is going to lose his virginity to one member of our studio audience. [ cheering ] tonight we embarked on week two of colton's quest for love. the subject of colton's lack of sexual experience came up again tonight during his one-on-one date with hannah b. who asked what i thought was a pretty solid question. >> i don't think anybody has really -- like why are you a virgin? seriously. >> yeah.
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my virginity is almost one of those things i look at, and i'm like i accidentally ended up like this. >> jimmy: what? it's that britney spears song, "oops i didn't do it again." at a very young age, colton put a padlock on his pants and misplaced the key. and's never been able to get them open. there is one person on the show taking things even slower than colton. heather tonight somehow managed to outvirgin the virgin. >> i actually am a virgin, but i have never kissed anyone before. >> really? >> yes. i just -- it's a weird thing telling people. >> yeah. i mean. it sort of is just because it is something very personal, so i respect the heck out of that. i really do. >> thank you. well, i'm glad you told me. i really am. >> thank you. you're so sweet. >> jimmy: okay.
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great talk. let's never touch each other again. they're really getting the most out of this virgin thing. tonight for the group date, each of the women told a important story about the first time in their lives and colton got things going with his story. >> so for most of my adult life, i had a secret. i was a virgin. [ applause ] >> jimmy: you can see, people are supportive is what the message is. you know, i've been working on my own "the bachelor" theme project. most people don't find love on television. television love is the deepest love you could ever have. so i have offered my matchmaking services to danielle m., who is a contestant on the next season of "the bachelor." and then danielle was on "bachelor in paradise." neither of those worked out for her. so danielle agreed to let me help her on tinder. she signed up. she got a t right is the right way.
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we whittled it down. tonight we present danielle's first two-on-one date with me and a hopeful young suitor named dustin. this is danielle's date with destiny. >> previously on "the matchelor" danielle m. and i signed up for tender looking for mr. swipe right. >> nope. >> we discussed the things she wanted. >> i want some kids. >> and the things she didn't. >> oh, no. >> no, no. >> now it's time to meet her first match, face-to-face. so last week we went through all these guys. >> we did. >> you did some further investigation. >> i did. >> you found some guys that you might be interested in. >> yeah. >> with my help, of course. >> yes. >> and approval. >> it was your help. >> one of the guys is a guy named dustin. >> yes. >> let's go through dustin's thing. >>e 3 says he is a sports announcer. doesn't say for who or what. >> he dresses as superman. >> he does dress as superman. he could be nice. >> we're going to find out
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because you set it up. one after another, these guys are going to come meet us here. they don't know that i'm going to be here. >> they don't. >> and they don't know the camera is going to be here. they do know you're going to be here. >> yeah, they know i'm here. >> oh, there is dustin right now. >> hi! >> hello there. hey. how are you doing? i'm helping. >> i'm dustin. >> nice to meet you, dustin. >> how are you? i'm jimmy. please, have a seat here, dustin. this is a special date we're on right now. >> what's going on? >> so you guys have been in touch over tender, danielle. >> yeah. >> so tell us a little bit about yourself. >> my name is dustin derieux. a sports announcer but also a director of a mental health nonprofit. i stay active with causes ranging from women's issue, veteran's issues, mental health. children's hospital, super captain america. >> that's why he is superman.
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>> why do you have a beard if you're superman? >> normally i don't. but i'm recovering from a rattlesnake bite. >> please tell me about this. i saw this on your profi. >> yeah. one sec. >> oh, look at his body. >> yeah, i was working at an outdoor athletic event in texas, and they came over the radio, and they said that there was a rattlesnake at one of our water stations, and i'm very much like steve irwin in the way. >> you know steve irwin died, though. >> yes, he is very, very much like steve irwin. >> you see, when i got bitten by the snake, it's very, very fast-acting. i only had a matter of minutes before everything started to go wrong. but when you're bitten by the love bug, it takes a little longer to set in and develop. so who knows? because i definitely feel something. >> i'm a nerd. i like comic books, comic book movies, superhero stuff. >> what was the last book you
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read that wasn't a comic book? >> i read "lord of the rings." >> that's impressive. do you have an actual job, though? >> yes. sports announcing. >> that's a real job. >> i announce for all kinds of athletic events. primarily things in the obstacle racing industry. i've worked in that industry roughly eight years. i do lots of freelance announcing for all kinds of events from ranging things at san diego comic-con all the way to the international pole dancing convention. yeah. >> are you looking for a serious relationship? >> i'm open to it, but i'm -- >> are you interested in children? in the future? >> i mean, maybe one day. it's not a big priority for me. i mean, it's not a big priority for me -- priority for me -- priority for me. prioooority for me. >> all right. so what we'll do is i'm going to take this all under consideration, and we will decide where we go from here. >> okay.
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>> great to meet you. >> you as well. >> take care of that arm. >> i'm doing my best. >> i'm going to keep the jacket. >> the thing that made me want to meet danielle was her charity work. more than anything, i love compassion in a person. i'd like to know more about her. all i know is she takes nice photos and she is a nurse. >> good luck. be careful. >> i'm really glad i put actual effort into styling my hair today. it's really hard to hold a dryer. >> next time on "the matchelor" -- >> we wanted to meet you and kind of get to know you. he is handsome. we saw that in the pictures. good news. we're interested in you. >> jimmy: what an amazing journey this promises to be. stay with us for it. tonight in the show, we have music from jacob banks. "the bachelor" colton underwood is here. and we'll be right back with anne hathaway. ♪
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the xfinity store is here. and it's simple, easy, awesome. ♪ >> jimmy: welcome back to the show tonight. we follow every moment of his love life for no good reason whatsoever on "the bachelor." from "the bachelor," the bachelor colton underwood is here. [ cheering and applause ] then, his latest album is called "village." jacob banks from the mercedes-benz stage. very talented guy. whom you can see live op tour starting tomorrow night at the wonder ballroom in portland, oregon. tomorrow night on our show, ted danson will be here. abbi jacobson and ilana glazer will join us. we'll have music from mitchell tenpenny later this week. and later this week, jane fonda and lily tomlin, regina king, stefan james and jon bernthal, with music from sharon van etten and juanes. so please join us for all of that.
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our first guest tonight is an oscar, emmy, and golden globe-winning actor, singer and catwoman. starting january 25th, she and matthew mcconaughey return from space for a new thriller called "serenity." please say hello to anne hathaway. [ applause ] ♪ >> hi! >> jimmy: i like this suit you have on here. >> thank you. i'm wearing it for all the people in your audience who like to watch through the kirakira app. >> jimmy: what does it do? >> it takes anything that sparkles and blows it up times a thousand. we were trying it backstage. >> jimmy: all right. i'll try it. i don't usually get into that kind of thing, but now i will. congratulations. by the way, you had your son since the last time i saw you. how old is he? >> he is going to be 3.
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3 in march. >> jimmy: and what is his name? >> jonathan. >> jimmy: now that's not a fun baby celebrity name. do you at least spell it with a g or put a y in there somewhere? >> no, no, simple, straight forward. >> jimmy: good old john. my brother's name is jonathan. >> jonathan jimmy. >> jimmy: it's a classic name. >> it's a classic name that you would trust with your money. just in case he ever wants to be an accountant. i got to say, i did have fun with people while i was president. >> jimmy: what? [ laughter ] >> meaning that -- >> jimmy: man, this is a shocking revelation. >> hey, guys, what's up? a lots changed since the last time i was here. [ laughter ] i had fun with people's expectations. >> jimmy: oh, okay. >> you went oh, yeah. because people expect celebrities to be stupid. >> jimmy: yes. >> and to name their children ridiculous things. >> jimmy: right. >> so i found i could tell
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people my kid's name was going to be anything and watch their faces as they tried to process it. >> jimmy: that's good. >> so my favorite names that i came up with were -- i'm pregnant, and you're asking me what my baby name is. >> jimmy: oh, how sweet. what are you thinking of naming the baby? >> well, my husband's over here. well, we have two names. if it's a boy we're going to go with huandre. and if it's a girl, velise. >> jimmy: jaundre! >> no, no, huandre, huandre. >> jimmy: jaundre. >> i said this to one couple, and she had the best most british reaction ever. i said huandre and velise. and without missing a beat, she said "such original names." >> jimmy: i wanted to name my daughter karate.
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but my wife wouldn't go for it. i thought karate kimmel would be great. >> for a cat -- kid? >> jimmy: for a human. >> okay. >> i'm so glad you have molly in your life. >> jimmy: you're enjoying motherhood? wouldn't it be something if you said not at all? >> you know, what am i going to do. no, i love it. i love it. >> jimmy: does your boy show any signs of wanting to be an actor or performer or anything like that? >> he is more into music. he loves it. right now he is obsessed with ""the lion king"". >> jimmy: that's a good one. >> it's really great. >> jimmy: is he a good singer? >> sorry. he hates my voice. >> jimmy: he likes your voice? >> he hates it. i'm not allowed to sing in my own house anymore. >> jimmy: he tells you not to sing. my daughter gets a little weird. >> oh, that makes me feel better. >> jimmy: she loves it. >> oh! >> jimmy: because i'm mostly singing about the toilet and stuff like that. because it's weird when all of the sudden your mother goes from talking to like doing something odd. i don't know.and hen she sang.
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>> jimmy: you did? >> to be fair, my son loves my mother's voice. it's personal. >> jimmy: that makes it more difficult. >> it's definitely personal. >> jimmy: did you tell him you won an oscar with that voice and maybe he should appreciate it? >> every single day and he just doesn't care. >> jimmy: this is pretty great. you put this on instagram. was that your first head shot? >> that was my first head shot. >> jimmy: whose idea was it to put your fists on your hips? >> a very talented photographer named bob newy. because it was commercial. that was going to make everybody want to hire me. i'm ready for anything. whatever you need, i can do it all. i've clearly grown out of that. >> jimmy: and you picked the picture, and you're like yeah, this is great. did it work? did it get you jobs? >> i did get a couple of jobs. i'm not sure from this one, but i did get a couple of jobs. >> jimmy: were you already doing stuff like school plays and what not at that time? >> i wanted to -- well, my mom is an actress. i grew up backstage at theaters watching her. i just thought it was what
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people did. >> jimmy: right. >> and then i really wanted to do what my parents had seen a couple of kids who were professionals maybe not have the most normal childhood. >> jimmy: yeah. >> so they send me to -- you know, it was at the papermill play house in new jersey. i studied there. i studied at a few different places. >> jimmy: what shows did you do at the papermill play house? >> we would do adaptations of disney movies. we did "the little mermaid" and we did "aladdin." we always did a show and we would come together at the end and quickly put on our purple sweatshirts and sing the papermill play house song. >> jimmy: what is the papermill play house song? do you remember it? >> seared in here. the lyrics are -- the lyrics with hand gestures are we are the papermill players performing for you. this jacket is so appropriate for this story. it's style that will always shine through. singing together -- and then you have to switch sides and get the kid who is over here and playing our pars and sharing what's in our hearts.
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and then there was a kick line. >> jimmy: what was that? ♪ we are the papermill players >> jimmy: anne hathaway, one of the papermill players. we'll be right back. [ cheering and applause ] ♪ >> dicky: portions of jimmy kimmel live are brought to you by skittles commercial, the broadway musical. musical. [friend] i've never seen that before. ♪ ♪ i have... ♪ just as important as what you get out of it? i have... our broccoli cheddar is made with aged melted cheddar, simmered broccoli,
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[clang] they got to him! doh!! oh! i don't believe it! can you believe it?! ♪ ♪ ♪
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my husband is joining me here the day after tomorrow. i want you to take him out on your boat, let him get drunk. then drop him into the ocean for the sharks. in return, i will give you $10
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million, cash. >> jimmy: that is anne hathaway and matthew mcconaughey in "serenity." it opens january 25th. >> matthew is aging backwards. >> jimmy: what's that? >> matthew is aging backwards. it's weird. >> jimmy: you know what? he is such a delightfully unusual person. >> yes. >> jimmy: do you find yourself becoming part of his orbit? because it seems like i've been around him a few times. everybody kind of does what he's up to. >> absolutely. totally. like all of the sudden you're with him and you find yourself kind of like leaning back. you talk, you know. maybe you don't enunciate as much. but sometimes you do. you enunciate intentionally. [ laughter ] >> you drink more. you feel a little bit cooler. he is just great. >> jimmy: does he know you do an impersonation of him? everybody does an impersonation of him. yours is very good. >> oh, thank you very much. >> jimmy: most people go with all right, all right, all right. >> that's an entry. >> jimmy: that's a starter. >> a starter one. i just think it's fun when you
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spend enough time with him you know how to riff with him. so give me a topic. >> jimmy: okay. let's see. let's -- i can't think of any topics. football. >> oh, football. foot-ball. i like it. i like the tennessee titans. i like the patriots, god bless america. the poor game, sit down, play a little ball, maybe break a sweat first. have the kids, family, intentions. [ applause ] >> jimmy: wow! >> intentionality with the football, passing it down the line. it's a great game. great game. a great imitation of the world. >> jimmy: i feel like i'm in the back seat of a lincoln right now. >> yeah, good. thank god. wild turkey after the game. >> jimmy: this movie is -- we really can't say anything about it. >> we can't say anything. >> jimmy: anything that is said about the movie other than what we just saw, even that clip we had to negotiate to get the clip. >> is that true.
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>> jimmy: everything ruins it. >> oh, no. it's kind of true. you can't really know anything going in. but it's a mystery, and it's a thriller, and it's sexy, and it's wrong. and it tears you -- i know. and it kind of just, i don't know, it ripped me a part in this really good way from my head to my -- i'm really proud of it. steven knight is an incredible mind. it's a film about all the things we're not talking about. >> jimmy: okay. >> it's about violence, and it's about the inheritance of violence. and this is a family. for me, this is a family that has been torn apart by war, and we're meeting them ten years after that event. >> jimmy: okay. >> and it's alluded to in the movie. so it's not an easy film to talk about. it's an easy film to talk about after you've seen it. it's about a lot. and i'm so proud of it. >> jimmy: well, the movie is called "serenity." it opens january 25th. anne hathaway, matthew mcconaughey. thank you for being here. "the bachelor," do you watch "the bachelor"? you do not watch "the bachelor,? >>putting me on the no, : ne is
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"the bachelor" is here. we'll be right back. ♪
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>> jimmy: welcome back. the bachelor colton underwood and music from jacob banks is on the way. but first, let's go back out to hollywood boulevard for a
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weather update from chief meteorologist, sandy cross. sandy, sandy, what is the latest on the ground and in the sky here in hollywood? >> it's still wet out here, jimmy. >> jimmy: thank you, sandy. that is sandy cross. we'll be right back with the bachelor. ♪ ♪ woman 1: proof of less joint pain... woman 2: ...and clearer skin. woman 3: this is my body of proof. man 2: proof that i can fight psoriatic arthritis... woman 4: ...with humira. woman 5: humira targets and blocks a specific source of inflammation that contributes to both joint and skin symptoms. it's proven to help relieve pain, stop further irreversible joint damage, and clear skin in many adults. humira is the #1 prescribed biologic for psoriatic arthritis. avo: humira can lower your ability to fight infections. serious and sometimes fatal infections, including tuberculosis,
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>> jimmy: jacob banks. last week, our next guest began a televised quest to find a partner for life and to say goodbye to his virginity. you can watch him on "the bachelor" monday nights here on abc. please welcome colton underwood. ♪ how's it going? >> good. how you? >> jimmy: i'm good. for those who don't know how the show works, we're on week two of seeing what's going on "the bachelor." but you've wrapped the season.
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>> yeah, i'm in something like week 30. >> jimmy: how long since you've been taping the show? >> it was right before thanksgiving. >> jimmy: so you, we keep hearing you're a virgin. but you probably had sex 185 times by now. >> i don't know. i don't know what to say. >> jimmy: wouldn't that be something if you didn't know? >> yes. >> jimmy: you know if you come out of this thing, people have been driving you nuts with this virgin thing. if you come out this and you're still a virgin, you might as well just never have sex, ever. >> yeah. >> jimmy: you might as well forget it all together. >> i feel like the longest time "the bachelor" has known for the journey for love. i think they're trying to angle it somewhere else this season. >> jimmy: it would also be weird. when you go into the fantasy suite -- did you go into the fantasy suite? >> i will say the fantasy suite was the most pivotal week of my journey. >> jimmy: so you did go to the fantasy suite. >> yes.
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i did make it to that week. >> jimmy: are you miked up there? >> you're miked up until you open up the door. and right on the other side of the door, they demike you. >> jimmy: they take it off or they tell you you're not listening? >> they take it off, but i checked the room. >> jimmy: you did? you did a search of the room? >> yeah. >> jimmy: because i'm thinking about it now. if there was tape of me losing my virginity, it would be the funniest thing you ever heard. >> yeah. >> jimmy: i'd be begging. the songs of the '80s playing on the car radio. it really would be crazy. yes. okay. so i predicted, did you see my prediction. >> jimmy: >> yeah. >> jimmy: it's really my wife's prediction. she is good at picking. i predicted and we feel very strongly that this is correct. we feel strongly that you picked cassie. cassie is a 23-year-old speech pathologist from huntington beach. she seemed to have everything that we imagined you are looking for.
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did you pick cassie? >> you know, cassie is a great, great lady. >> jimmy: okay. have you seen cassie since the end of the show? remember, you're under oath. >> yeah, i'm under oath. i'm also under contract. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: in tonight's episode, with demi, that's her name. >> yeah. >> jimmy: she kind of -- is it proper to say she forced a massage on you? >> she took me to the fantasy closet. >> jimmy: she took you to the fantasy closet, which is weird. because you're coming out of the closet before you even lose your virginity. >> it was a bold move. >> jimmy: it was a bold move. >> yeah. >> jimmy: this is how i would be the bachelor. i would say listen, i'm going to need massages from everyone. >> oh. >> jimmy: i'll, you know, i'll give out instead of roses i'd be handing out jars of coconut oil or something like that. >> yeah, i see. yeah. >> jimmy: just to see. >> physical touch is a big part of any relationship. >> jimmy: well, yeah, now it is.
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>> yeah. >> jimmy: physical touch is a big part of any relationship. >> what? >> jimmy: who gave you that line? >> it is. it's a love lingers. >> jimmy: physical touch is. in fact, let's hold hands during the rest of this interview. i do want to ask something we saw in the previews. could we play that clip? this is something that happens later in the season. >> i'm done. holy -- >> colton! >> jimmy: wow. i think you're the first bachelor ever to attempt an escape. >> yeah. >> jimmy: what led to that? >> um, it's tough for me -- i don't want you to take it out of context. >> jimmy: too late! >> that jump is very meaningful. >> jimmy: it was impressive, by the way. you really went right over. >> i will say at that moment i was done. >> jimmy: you were done with the show? >> yeah. >> jimmy: and then what happened? why did you change your mind? >> well, it's a long story. do we have time for it?
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>> will it ruin the show? >> it might. >> jimmy: who went after you? >> chris did. >> jimmy: chris harris. >> i ran with him on trained with him in the morning. he is an athletic dude. he tried to do the fence after me the next day and he couldn't get it. >> jimmy: did they put that on the show? >> i hope they do. >> jimmy: i'm not editing. i wish i was. but if they do not put chris trying to jump that fence, they missed a great opportunity for good tv. >> jimmy: really? >> yeah. >> jimmy: so you leap the fence. you start running, and then you look back and you see chris struggling to get over the fence? >> well, i ran away. i ran into some wildlife, and that sort of scared me. i mean, i don't have my phone or anything. >> jimmy: what did you run into? >> don't know and i didn't want to. >> jimmy: you just heard something. >> and nope, this ain't for me. >> jimmy: that's what they do. on the perimeter they have cougars waiting for you. >> they were ready.
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but no. >> jimmy: some people don't believe you're a virgin. do you know that? guillermo. guillermo does not believe you. >> guillermo: >> i don't believe you. i don't believe you at all. >> jimmy: he doesn't believe you're a virgin. >> i don't get that. >> jimmy: because look at your face. that's why. >> but why would i go on national television and say that. >> jimmy: yeah? why did you do that? i know you're a virgin, because i'm going to tell you something this morning. i was making toast. and this is unbelievable. this came right out of my toaster, this miraculous -- >> that's me. >> jimmy: of you on toast. and at that moment i knew you were truly a virgin as you've been saying. >> you didn't eat it. thank you. >> jimmy: i'm going to eat it. but of course i wanted to save it for a little while. now you posted this to instagram. this is a sweatshirt. where did you get this sweatshirt? >> from puppies make me happy. >> jimmy: from the people at puppies make me happy. well, we have made you a shirt for that. there you go. that's for you. >> do i even want to look at it?
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i'm just going to hold it up. >> sex makes me happier. [ applause ] stay tuned to my instagram. : helor" mit up too. nights at 8:00 here at abc. colton underwood, everybody. thank you, colton. we'll be right back with jacob banks. ♪ >> the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is presented by mercedes-benz, the best of nothing. nothing. when you're powering up for a video game binge try my new chilli cheese or triple cheese and bacon curly fries for just $3. jack. so just so you know, i was like this close to totally destroying your planet until i heard about those fries. that's uh, so thoughtful.
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try my new $3 sauced and loaded fries. your but as you get older,hing. it naturally begins to change, causing a lack of sharpness, or even trouble with recall. thankfully, the breakthrough in prevagen helps your brain and actually improves memory. the secret is an ingredient originally discovered... in jellyfish. in clinical trials, prevagen has been shown to improve short-term memory. prevagen. healthier brain. better life.
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my new $3 sauced & loaded fries with curly fries and all-beef chilli or triple cheese and bacon are perfect for a late night video game binge. i would destroy the entire zerkanian armada for those fries. or you could just pay 3 bucks. or that. try my new $3 sauced and loaded fries. >> dicky: the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is presented by mercedes-benz. the best or nothing. >> jimmy: i want to thank anne hathaway and colton underwood, apologies to matt damon. thanks for the weather, sandy. "nightline" is next, but first, this is his new album "village." here with the song "chainsmoking," jacob banks! ♪ ♪ mmm mmm mmm ♪ it's getting harder to breathe
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chainsmoking your love ♪ ♪ can't be good for my sanity can't be good for my lungs ♪ ♪ chainsmoking your love i know my lease is up and the bailiff's at the door and still i'm hanging on to the life we had before ♪ ♪ i know this cold love won't lead me to the lord although i'm black and blue i'm begging you for more ♪ ♪ yeah it's getting harder to breathe chainsmoking your love ♪ ♪ can't be good for my sanity
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can't be good for my lungs ♪ ♪ chainsmoking your love chainsmoking your love chainsmoking your love chainsmoking your love ♪ ♪ we watched the water rise while waiting by the shore take me on top of the world and leave me on the floor ♪ ♪ you say we're meant to be well, i'm seeing you honesty i'll be a casualty when morning comes oh ♪
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♪ it's getting harder to breathe chainsmoking your love ♪ ♪ can't be good for my sanity can't be good for my lungs ♪ ♪ it's getting harder to breathe chainsmoking your love ♪ ♪ can't be good for my sanity can't be good for my lungs ♪ ♪ chainsmoking your love oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh ♪ ♪ chainsmoking your love chainsmoking your love
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chainsmoking your love chainsmoking your love ♪ ♪ oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh ♪ ♪ chainsmoking your love [ applause ] ♪
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tonight, repeated calls for help. >> i think they're trying to lure me somewhere. >> calls that just weren't enough. >> i wanted to, i called 911 because i was just concerned. >> the college track star, dating a master panmanipulator, stalking her, breaking it off with him turned out to be the breaking point >> then she just started saying no, no, no, no, like someone might have been grabbing her or something. >> lauren mccluskey on the phone with her mother when he went on the attack. >> you were trying to save your daughter's life in that moment. >> absolutely. >> for the first time, her parents

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