evening. thank you so much for joining us. thanks for being here. >> dicky: from hollywood it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- gwyneth paltrow chef evan funke and music from lunay and now more than that jimmy kimmel! ♪ [cheers and applause] >> jimmy: thank you. thank you very much. welcome. i'm jimmy. i'm the host of the show. thanks for watching, thanks for coming, thank you for joining us on another ukrainy day here in the united states. >> you know, i say this a lot, it feels like i say it every day now. but today really was nuts. it's hard to imagine that news saying that the president of the united states wanted to build an moat filled with alligators and snakes. [ chuckles ] to eat families coming over the

so, what are some key takeaways from this commercial? border would be the second biggest story of the day but somehow it is that. a new book by a couple writers -i like that, just not when it comes out of her mouth. from the "new york times" cites -yeah, as a mother, i wouldn't want my kids to see that. multiple sources in the -good mom. -to see -- wait. i'm sorry. what? administration -don't kids see enough violence as it is? who say trump wanted an moat, he wanted snakes, alligators, an -i've seen violence. electrified wall with spikes on -maybe we turn the word "bundle" into a character, top to keep immigrants out. like mr. bundles. he was said to be so frustrated -top o' the bundle to you. by lack of progress on his [ laughter ] bundle, bundle, bundle. stupid wall. -my kids would love that. -yeah. at one point he shouted at everyone, i ran on this issue, you guys are making me look like an idiot, and they were like -- sorry, mr. president, >> dicky: the jimmy kimmel tell us about this moat filled concert series is presented by mercedes benz, the best or nothing. with alligators and snakes. >> jimmy: i'd like to thank gwyneth paltrow, chef evan funke according to the book during the and apologies to matt damon. nightline is next but first -- same meeting he suggested shooting mieg wloon here with the sing go, "fin de e shooting migrants who cross the border. people said we can't do that. he said no shoot them in the legs to slow them down. kp semana" and then he had them run a cost analysis for this plan, for the

shooting and attack snakes plan, ♪ and that should be it, shouldn't that result in everyone being ♪ [ singing in foreign language ] escorted out of the white house and into the wild? it should, but it, it hasn't. and the president of course denied these allegations, now he said the press is trying to sell the fact that i wanted a moot stuffed with alligators and snakes. a moot is like a canadian moat. it's a different. [cheers and applause] you guys know. it's planned on the southern border. he's building a moat. at the top there will be a moot. not only did trump tweet denial, he yelled at a reporter who asked him about it. ♪ >> so these two reporters wrote [ singing in foreign language ] this book, and they said i want a moat with alligators, snakes, ♪ electrified fences so people get electrocuted if they so much as [ singing in foreign language ] ♪ [ singing in foreign language ] touch the fence and spikes on

top. i never said it, i said i'm tough on the border, not that ♪ tough. okay. it was a lie. >> jimmy: he didn't want alligators, he wanted dragons with fire in their mouths, like [ singing in foreign language ] the one calisi had. this story by the way was ♪ corroborated by a dozen white house officials who spoke on condition of anonymity. that's all of them i guess. how many could be left? and this idea of an moat, where would they get an idea like this? >> they'll say we need to quadruple the border patrol or they want a higher fence. maybe they'll need an moat. maybe they'll want alligators in the moat. >> jimmy: obama and his jokes again have us in a fix. ♪ [ singing in foreign language ] thanks, obama. so anyway, now we have a new scandal, gator gate. but as horrible as that is, and it is horrible, and we must not forget that. the main event in washington, d.c. right now is impeachment.

all the president's hench men are getting in on this. today we learned that the >> thank you! secretary of state, mike pompeo was part of trump's now infamous call with the ukraine. even though he acted like he didn't know anything about it. pompeo held a press conference ♪ in italy where he admitted on second thought he was on the call, so oops. [ singing in foreign language ] >> thank you! epico. [cheers and applause] >> i was on the phone call. >> the phone call was in the context of now, i guess i've been secretary of state for coming on a year and a half, i know precisely what the american policy with respect to ukraine. it's been remarkably consistent, and we will continue to try to drive -- >> jimmy: i think that means six more weeks of impeachment. [cheers and applause] there's a very distinct pattern when trump or one of his characters get caught on something. first they deny it or play dumb. then they say i did do it, but they act like it was no big deal.

then they say they didn't do it xxx after they said they did it. pompeo is at stage two of that. give him a couple days. . >> this is nightline. with all this shrapnel coming at tonight -- she took us on jolly him, the president is absolutely melting down. today he continued his attacks holidays. ♪ it's a jolly holiday with you burt ♪ >> and made the hills come on chairman of the house alive. ♪ the hills are alive with the intelligence committee adam schiff. he called schiff a lowlife, repeatedly accused him of sound of music ♪ treason, which is a word he >> now the new memoir revealing doesn't know the definition of. he floated the theory that schiff wrote the the struggles to diane sawyer. whistle-blower's report. high and low notes. based on nothing. he even gave him a new nickname. those favorite things. >> he's shifty schiff, a shifty, dishonest guy. and this guy was negative on taken with a spoonful of sugar. mary poppins practically perfect in every way. mike pompeo, he can't, you know, and she wasn't. there's an expression, he so there couldn't carry his blank strap, i won't say it, because they'll say it was so terrible to say. but that guy couldn't carry his blank strap, you understand that? >> jimmy: i'm not sure i do, let's go do our experts to find out. gene? >> dumb donald is really dumb. >> now dumb is he? >> got a letter from a

politician asking for support. but instead of money he sent the politician a blank. >> jockstrap. >> can you say jockstrap on television? >> i don't know. >> jimmy: you can now. if you go through all the seasons of match game you can predict the future. it's incredible. so the schiff is hitting the tan. the president repeated a curse word. he tweeted a curse word in all caps. he could use a million rounds of golf right now. he says this investigation has nothing do with his perfect call to ukraine. he says the democrats have been out to get him since the day he won. and was sworn in. >> shifty schiff should resign, in disgrace by the way. and jerry nadler and all of them, it's a disgrace what's going on. you have a perfect, i mean, perfect converti president of another country, ukraine in this case. and they try and say oh, let's impeach him. they've been trying to impeach

me from the day i got elected. i've been going through this for ththe day i got elected. >> jimmy: and guess what, they're about to get their wish. [cheers and applause] thanks to you. all credit. all credit goes to him. but i have to say, i do think these guys are going about their the wrong way. democrats need to stop using the word impeach. he gets defensive. they should tell him, listen, mr. president, you've done an amazing job. you've done such an amazing job we are sending you right to the hall of fame. you will be the first inductee into the president hall of fame. we're going to retire your jersey, we'll have a ceremony, maybe a parade, then lead him into a hall of some kind and lock him in it. [cheers and applause] maybe hand him a trophy. and throw a few of those snakes and alligators in there while we're at it. an innocent bystander in all of

this today was the president of finland. this poor guy was unfortunate enough to stand next to trump during his crazy press conference. he was in america today to bear witness to our president throwing a televised tantrum the likes of which the finnish have probably never seen. >> i've done more than any president in the history of this country has done. for me it's like putting on a suit in the morning. people have said to me, how does he handle it? rush limbaugh said i don't know of any person in america who could handle it. sean hannity has said it. others said the same thing. >> jimmy: that's the helsinki shuffle. the finnish president even got a chance to see trump take a shot at the speaker of the house. he saved his best material of the day for nancy pelosi. sved althese subpoenas. now look at nancy pelosi, nancy pelosi hands out subpoenas like

they're cookies. you want a subpoena? here you go, take them, like they're cookies. paul ryan would not give subpoenas. nancy pelosi? here you go. take it. who wants a subpoena? every day you get subpoenas. >> jimmy: that's right, now open your mouth for some more subpoenas. because you're the cookie monster, and if you don't believe the president that this is all a hoax, just ask his good pal vladimir. >> let me just tell you, the whole thing is a scam. the mueller deal was a scam, the russian collusion was a scam. you can ask putin. no one's been tougher on russia than trump. >> jimmy: just ask putin. he'll tell you what's what. he's very open. putin defended trump as he's been known to do. putin said i see nothing compromising in the

conversation. between trump and zelensky. any head of state would have done the same. they've been using any reason to attack trump. now it is ukraine. i think that's sweet that he stands by his man like that. then putin joked that russia is planning to interfere in the 2020 election. he said i'll tell you a secret. yes we'll definitely do it. just don't tell anyone. he loves this so much. he did it once he'll do it twice. it's like lucy pulling the football away from charlie brown, only in this case, charlie brown is donnie orange, and we are, i don't know what we are, i guess we're the dirt. and if that all wasn't enough, the inspector general of the state department called an urgent meeting with members of congress. he scheduled it yesterday for this morning. all we knew it was highly unusual. after the meeting, jamie raskin who is on the house oversight committee, held a strange little chat with the press. >> and he wanted to give as you

packet of information, which is unclassified. which originally arrived at the department of state addressed to secretary pompeo and looks like this. so it's in calligraphy. says secretary pompeo, attention, and it says the white house. so it may have come from the white house. it may not. we don't know. and there is a series of folders, which all come from trump hotels. so folder after folder that say trump hotel. now i haven't had time to thoroughly scrutinize everything but it's eentially a p>>immy: r packet of propaganda which is apparently full of stories about joe biden and other people trump doesn't like, whoever it was wrote on the front in calligraphy to secretary pompeo, the white house, and then they

put all the propaganda in folders from the trump hotel. now if this is from someone who's working in support of donald trump, that person is an idiot, which considering who we're dealing with is entirely, not just possible, but probable. can you believe they put conspiracy information in folders that said trump hotel? it is so dumb it almost has to be the president who did this. i wonder if any was written in sharpie because -- [ applause ] speaking of villainous clowns, the number one movie at the box office this weekend is expected to be "joker." the origin story of batman's greatest foe. we ran it by our in-house movie critic. yehya loves movies and movie stars. he's spent so much of his life trying to get pictures with them. and here he is talking about the movie "joker." >> hi.

wait a minute, i'm sorry. action! hi, it's me, yehya. talk about the movie coming the movie behind me is jocker, jocker >> is it just me? siler alert. >> batman is not in that movie. >> [ bleep ]. >> only the joker. before the joker, jack nicholson, that's the one. john legend. yeah, john legend, god bless him. and also the guy who do the joker is jack like something like that. joaquin phoenix is good actor. he done lot of movie like he do the movie he played the guitar with the lady threw the spoon something. and then he did the movie also

and he made sex on the computer, now he do the movie "joker" with robert de niro, and robert de niro play like a talking show like jimmy kimmel, like jay leno, like johnny carson, and the guy ed mcmahon. the guy steven something and the guy kobe labrien with red hair and the general. the movie for him. the movie i like it because you know with charlene stone and robert de niro who did the movie in hospital his brain not good. >> you got a gift, my friend. >> also he did the movie something taxi driver and martin scorsese, and he say you talkin' to me? you talkin' to me? i'm the only one here, nobody here. the joker!

[ laughter ] [cheers and applause] ♪ >> jimmy: thank you, yehya. all right, we have a good show tonight, music from lunay chef evan funke is here and we'll be right back with gwyneth paltrow. [cheers and applause] ♪ abc's jimmy kimmel live, brought to you by tj maxx. abs's jimmy kimmel live brought to you by applebee's. ♪ combinations starting at $9.99. up to 12 ♪ [growling] mail slice. ♪

♪ i'm jimmy dean, and only one like this any nicer.ning a hearty, hefty, good tasting breakfast. with eggs, bacon, sausage, cheese and taters. and when you finish, you know you had something to eat. and take an extra 15 or 20% off! get to kohl's... plus - take an extra 15% off your $50 home sale purchase! save on the ninja foodi... nine west handbags and luggage... and all koolaburra by ugg is up to 25% off. plus - get kohl's cash! right now - at kohl's.

stop dancing around the pain that keeps you up again, and again. advil pm silences pain, and you sleep the whole night. advil pm yeah, that needs mmm. that's better. hvr seasoning. you either love it or you really love it. no matter what life throws down ♪ roomba is up for the challenge. only roomba uses 2 multi-surface rubber brushes that powerfully clean up debris on all your floors. and only the roomba i7+ system empties its bin into allergenlock™ bags that trap 99% of allergens. forget about vacuuming for months. if it's not from irobot, it's not a roomba™ ♪

♪ ♪ ♪ good lunch? amazin'! toyota. let's go places.

>> jimmy: hi there, welcome back to the show.maker p aau sfoglino" chef evan funke is here to make something delicious. [cheers and applause] then he is apple music's up next artist.

his song is called "fin de semana" lunay from the mercedes-benz stage. tomorrow night, danny devito and bob iger will be with us, and we'll have music from anderson pack featuring smokey robinson. so please join us for that. >> jimmy: our first guest has an oscar, an emmy, a golden globe and a goop. she has a new show too called "the politician" it's streaming on netflix now. please welcome gwyneth paltrow. [cheers and applause] ♪ >> jimmy: very good to see you. >> great to see you, too. >> jimmy: you look fantastic. you always look healthy. you look like you were out having fun before you get to places it seems. were you out having fun today? >> um, yeah, sure. >> jimmy: if you weren't, it's

fine. congratulations. you just had your one-year anniversary of wedded bliss. [cheers and applause] >> we made it, we made it! >> jimmy: you guys, and correct me if i have any of this wrong. but you guys got married a year ago. >> yes. >> jimmy: and you moved in together like a month ago. >> yes. >> jimmy: now why is it, usually it goes the other way. >> well, true. i think really because we have, we each have two teenaged children whom we love very much, but we were just trying to be mindful and give them a little space and not move too quickly and -- >> jimmy: i see, so you then did merge, like the brady bunch but with less. >> yeah, less merging and more originally, but now we're merged. >> jimmy: you're merged now. >> and it's great. >> jimmy: and did he get to keep any of his stuff? or is it all your stuff? because i would imagine all your stuff is better than his stuff or anyone's stuff, really.

>> yeah, he got to keep some of his stuff. >> jimmy: he did. >> he has good taste. he's got really nice clothes. and we put some chairs from his house in there. >> jimmy: would that be a deal breaker if you walked in and he had like lawn chairs in the place and inflatable furniture? maybe a bud light sign hanging over the bed? >> yes. >> jimmy: that would be. interesting. because you have, is it now, have you reached the point where acting is less interesting to you than this business endeavor that you're involved with? >> i just love my company, and i love the people i work with, and i love what we're doing, and it's very, i think, acting is fantastic in its way, but i don't know, i have a bit more autonomy running a business. >> jimmy: right, right. as an actor, you're not the boss, right? >> definitely not, no. >> jimmy: by the way, speaking of, the reason i asked this question is because you were on

jon favreau's show, the chef, he has celebrities on, and you were on the show, and he was speaking to you about the scene you did together in "spiderman home coming" and you were unaware you had been in "spiderman home coming" which by the way you were. how did that happen? >> now i know this. i just got confused. there's so many of these wonderful marvel interconnecting movies, and i thought it was an avengers movie, but it was not. >> jimmy: i see, okay. was spiderman himself offended by this? was he okay with it? >> i never actually saw the movie. >> jimmy: oh, you didn't see the movie. >> i mean, wait! cut that out. take that back. >> jimmy: it's too late, tweet

it everywhere. it's okay if you didn't. it's spiderman. you're gwyneth paltrow. you shouldn't be watching "spiderman." it would upset people if you would be. have you ever read a comic book? >> um -- >> jimmy: no! remember, you're under oath, i don't know if you got that. i want to ask you about some, you know i signed up for goop like the day it started, right? >> thank you, i know, i love you for that. >> jimmy: i feel like i'm the ogoops as far as goop goes. >> yeah. >> jimmy: i have some items i want to ask you about. >> okay. >> jimmy: this is a product that i believe is on your holiday suggestion gift list. this is the martini bath soap. >> yes. >> jimmy: can you drink this? >> uh, no. but it's so heaven, like you have a hard day or people are giving you a hard time and you run a hot bath and you soak, smell. it is like. >> jimmy: yeah, it smells really good. than is something that i might get confused, and i might

actually have a sip of, because it does say martini on it. >> well, it's in quotes. >> jimmy: yeah, it's in quotes. >> the reason it's called the martini, in the movie business, when you're on the very last shot of the day, they call that shot the martini. >> jimmy: oh, got you. >> oh, boy. that makes sense. >> jimmy: this is a vibrator. and it's a great name, smile makers. >> smile makers is a brand of vibrators that we sell. we believe in women's health and sexual fulfillment. >> me, too. >> goop.com. that was the tennis coach. i think they also make the fireman and the millionaire. >> jimmy: so you think of your tennis coach. >> jimmy: why does the tennis coach look a little like bart simpson. >> i don't know, let's open it up. >> jimmy: let's open it up and try it out.

[cheers and applause] yep. >> oh, yeah. >> jimmy: oh, yeah. >> no, it doesn't look like a tennis coach at all. >> it looks like a tennis ball, maybe. >> jimmy: it's not quite the right color. but it's friendly looking, that's for sure. this is something the kids would get ahold of and be like hey, mom, what's this? and you'd be like give me that [ bleep ] thing. that's my tennis coach. [ applause ] this is a water bottle. >> yep. >> jimmy: what's rock in there? >> so this is an amethyst. and obviously, we're all trying to stop single-use plastics, so good to have a water bottle that you can use. and they say amethyst, i think it's supposed to be a heart opening. >> jimmy: who say this is? >> i don't know, but it's so pretty.

>> jimmy: the thing is, the amethyst is taking up a lot of the room in the water bottle, right? i mean, it better have some kind of magic properties. >> i think does. >> jimmy: and this is made out of glass, isn't? >> yes, so be careful. >> jimmy: that's actually dangerous. this was on one of your gift guides i think two years ago. >> oh, yes. >> jimmy: this really is camel milk. >> yes, the idea, we did an article once about #altmilk. there are a lot of alternative milks on the market. >> jimmy: some of them are not milk. like almond milk is not milk. they're not squeezing lady almonds and getting there, you know, but this is really from a camel. >> apparently it is really from a camel. are you going to try some? >> jimmy: yes, i don't know what it is, i find milk to be revolting in its cold form. uld yo to try some? ha

>> no, i've never had any. >> jimmy: and what, is this like a healthy? >> i think they purport to put, have more vitamins? >> jimmy: it will give you a hump. that would be a good marketing theme. all right, smells a little camely. >> yeah. >> jimmy: cheers. salute. there you go. [cheers and applause] it's not bad. >> not terrible. >> jimmy: yeah. >> i feel there's a goat-camel thing. >> jimmy: a goaty-ness in there? i've never had goat milk. this is good to know in a pinch if i'm in the desert. all right, we're going to finish these and take a break. gwyneth paltrow is with us. we'll be right back. ♪ shishito. burrito. raw kitfo.

fried shiso. french fry. iced chai. tasty. pad thai. baked pie. half stack. taco pack. lobster mac. baby back. pork chop. soda pop. kebab. soursop. hot pot. i'm hungry now. sp. cantaloupe. ice cream scoop. and osispy rin we are america's kitchen.

doordash. every flavor welco this... watch... tells... time and takes phone calls. and communicates with satellites thousands of miles above the earth and tracks your distance underwater and tracks your activity and tells you which direction you're going and has an app that measures the electrical waves traveling through your heart otherwise known as an electrocardiogram. so just to reiterate this... watch... tells... time (among other things).

aaddiction. how juuline hooked kids and ignited an public health crisis." other news outlets report- juul took $12.8 billion from big tobacco. markets e-cigarettes with kid friendly flavors and uses nicotine to addict them. 5 million kids use e-cigarettes. juul is "following big tobacco's playbook." and now, juul is pushing prop c to overturn e-cigarette protections. vote no on juul. no on big tobacco. no on prop c.

why this dream? >> because i'm compelled. like, like when they give you an answer on a math test, and it's your way to work your way backwards until you find the problem. i don't know what i'll find when i get there, but i know this is my only pass. why does that make you cry? >> because i love you so much. and i know i'm going to do whatever it takes to help you get what you want, and i'm sad for the person it's going to turn me into. >> jimmy: that's gwyneth paltrow in "the politician." that's good acting. your husband wrote this part for you? yes, and ian. >> jimmy: did he tell you he was going to write a character for

you? >> he was writing it and then he would be kind of like, i'm, first he was like, i'm inspiring the part. then he said you have to be in this. >> jimmy: had you written the script before? >> no. when they really asked me to do it then i read it. >> jimmy: did he stand behind you while you're reading it doing one of those deals like what do you think? >> no, he was chill. >> jimmy: he was chill about it. would you feel very uncomfortable saying, no i don't think i want to do it? >> well, you know, to be honest, i really was, you know, i'm really focussed on my day job at goop. and it's hard to sort of sneak away and do acting parts, but i did, you know, i love him a lot, and he wanted me to do it and so he roped me back in. >> jimmy: uh-huh. >> it was really fun. i enjoyed it a lot. >> jimmy: the show is, people, i mean it's a big hit, i think. >> i don't know. >> jimmy: how do you know? do they tell you.

>> they don't tell you. it's part of their mystique. >> jimmy: do you know when something you've done worked really well? >> i think you can tell. anecdotally, you get messages. you can tell when people are enjoying something. >> jimmy: you'll get text messages and things like that? >> yeah. don't you? don't all of you? >> jimmy: you get text messages if people like something and sometimes you'll just get no text messages. >> when it's radio silence, you're like, ooh, i just bombed. >> jimmy: yeah, it's weird. it doesn't occur to you until you start thinking back to the last thing. you're like, oh, boy, you know what? nobody mentioned anything about what i just did. like even my mother didn't say anything about it. >> true. >> jimmy: i know you know our chef, not our chef, but our next guest, chef evan funke very well. you just did an event with him. >> i did. i had the pleasure of interviewing him. at the 92nd street "y" in new

york for his book. >> jimmy: you guys are tight. >> i want to be really tight with him. >> jimmy: yeah. >> i think i'm making progress. >> jimmy: if you want, we can work on your tightness, and he's going to come and make some pasta. >> oh, my god. >> jimmy: would you like to remain and help? >> i would love to. >> jimmy: gwyneth paltrow! "the politician" is streaming now on netflix. we'll be right back with chef evan funke. ♪ ♪ performance comes in lots of flavors. there's the amped-up, over-tuned, feeding-frenzy-of sheet-metal-kind. and then there's performance that just leaves you feeling better as a result. that's the kind lincoln's about. ♪ hi! welcome towelcome to gigi's.

hi! welcome to lindsey's. hi! welcome to... shhh! (announcer) now you can enjoy al (ann!uncer) welcome toam.njoy al welcome to sean's. to luke's. (barks twice) (all) the mcnealy's! (announcer) make anywhere feel more like chili's. hi. with new delivery and to-go. ♪ ♪ ♪ 60% of women wear the wrong size pad, and can experience leaks.

you don't have to with always my fit try the next size up and get up to 20% better coverage - day or night because better coverage means better protection always. in a vast desert completely wdevoid of basset hounds. [ back in baby's arms by patsy cline ] then, it appeared a beacon of hope. ♪ i'm back in baby's arms more glorious than a billion sunsets. we were found. ♪ i'm back where i belong found by the hounds. ♪ back in baby's arms npacked with plant-based protein antioxidants and real superfoods new protein shake new snack break new emergen-c protein fuel & superfoods. emerge & see i wish i could tell ya how i feel about a mornin' like this.

and that includes a d tsgohearty br and save on nike...under . get to kohl's... adidas... and converse! save on nike apparel for kids' anwon. men's adidas tees st start at $34.99.r the fy plus - get kohl's cash! right now - at kohl's. keep being you. and ask your doctor about biktarvy. biktarvy is a complete one-pill, once-a-day treatment used for hiv in certain adults. it's not a cure, but with one small pill, biktarvy fights hiv with three different medicines to help you get to undetectable. that means the amount of virus is so low it can't be measured in lab tests. serious side effects can occur, including kidney problems and kidney failure. rare, life-threatening side effects include a build-up of lactic acid and liver problems. do not take biktarvy if you take dofetilide or rifampin.

tell your doctor about all the medicines and supplements you take, if you are pregnant or breastfeeding, or if you have kidney or liver problems, including hepatitis. if you have hepatitis b, do not stop taking biktarvy without talking to your doctor. common side effects were diarrhea, nausea, and headache. if you're hiv-positive, keep loving who you are, inside and out. ask your doctor if biktarvy is right for you. ♪

>> dicky: if you're going to be in the l.a. area and want to see the show, call 866-jimmy tix or go to jimmykimmellive.com. these are my people ♪ by the light of the earth, ♪ ♪ you can tell they are ours ♪ ♪ a new step to take ♪ and a new day will break ♪ yes, these are my people ♪ i have moderate to severe pnow, there's skyrizi.

♪ things are getting clearer, yeah i feel free ♪ ♪ to bare my skin ♪ yeah that's all me. ♪ nothing and me go hand in hand ♪ ♪ nothing on my skin ♪ that's my new plan. ♪ nothing is everything. keep your skin clearer with skyrizi. 3 out of 4 people achieved 90% clearer skin at 4 months. of those, nearly 9 out of 10 sustained it through 1 year. and skyrizi is 4 doses a year, after 2 starter doses. ♪ i see nothing in a different way ♪ ♪ and it's my moment so i just gotta say ♪ ♪ nothing is everything skyrizi may increase your risk of infections and lower your ability to fight them. before treatment your doctor should check you for infections and tuberculosis. tell your doctor if you have an infection or symptoms such as fevers, sweats, chills, muscle aches or coughs, or if you plan to or recently received a vaccine. ♪ nothing is everything ask your dermatologist about skyrizi. ♪ gnocchis.s. raviolis. and them smokeys.

curry. d . rri. berry. mcflurry. (mcdonald's) half stack. taco pack. lobster mac. and them baby back baby backs. we are america's kitchen. doordash. every flavor welcome. ust kemi. (woman, shouting) uh huh! (man, shouting) they must be coming from this tree up here. ♪ all i have to do is dream (everly brothers throughout) (man in background) chicken's almost done, folks! (indistinct cheering and laughing in the background.) that was a funny one! she's the funny one! ♪ (man) my mother was so wrong about you. (man, shouting) honey what are you doing? (woman, shouting) let's have a harvest party!? (man, shouting) i'll invite my mom! (man) nice! (woman) yeah, we need that. (man) definitely! ♪ all i have to do is dream ...perfectly seasoning our ohillshire farm smoked sausage. so by simply adding the right ingredients... ...you can end each day crafting a perfectly delicious dinner. she's staying in a rainforest tree house? that's my dream.

you dream big for a man on a plane to omaha. and she's zip lining with little jon? what! it's lil jon. even he knows that. thanks, captain obvious. you're with big jon. i'm steve. don't hate-like their trip, book yours with hotels.com and get rewarded basically everywhere. hotels.com. be there. do that. get rewarded. hendless shrimp even hotter?s you bring back nashville hot! oh yeah - it's back. crispy shrimp... ...tossed in a spicy rub... ...and drizzled with sweet amber honey. more shrimp more ways. endless shrimp's just fifteen ninety nine. hurry in. (paul) (sprintern)at special time it's iphone season at sprint. (paul) switch and get... (sprintern) the new iphone 11 or iphone 11 pro with amazing all-new camera systems. and now you can get iphone 11 (paul) ...for zero-dollars a month when you trade in your iphone7 or newer in any condition. (sprintern) seriously, any condition!

(paul) and with sprint's 100% see the savings for yourself.wkd (sprintern) can i get a... [air horn beep] it's iphone season. hey paul, do you love it? (paul) yeah. (sprintern) do you love it? (paul) i do. for people with hearing loss, visit sprintrelay.com. for that many calories you could have 9 veggie chips. these are more chip than veggie. while v8 is a snack you can veg out on. v8 the original plant powered drink. veg up.

>> jimmy: oh, hi, we're back with gwynneth paltrow. our next guest is known as the pasta whisperer and you are about to find out why. his new cookbook is called "american sfoglino" here to whisper sweet nothings to some tagliatelle, please welcome chef evan funke. what are we going to do here? tell us about your education, oh, my goodness, oh, well, if anyone gets out of line. wh dyou ha h

wou this beautiful slee. >> j [cheers and applause] >> jimmy: every reasonable person in the world. >> i make pasta like that. you cook a lot, don't you. >> jimmy: i cook a lot. >> and you eat. >> i do eat. i cook and i eat. >> let me grab that. this is a mortarello. >> jimmy: what does mortarello mean? >> stick. we've got egg dough. >> jimmy: how many eggs are in that dough? >> four. if you have four people coming over, you need four eggs and 400 grams of flour. >> jimmy: it makes it really yellow.

they must be really good eggs. >> the best eggs you can find. the thing about italian foods you have to source the best ingredients and try not to screw it up. >> jimmy: you went to italy and lived there a long time. >> i learned how to do this specifically from a woman and moved to bologna in '07. you want to try it? >> jimmy: i will. i'm not going to be good at it. >> you want to roll, treat your hand like a wheel well. let it roll. push with the palms. pull back with the fingers. >> jimmy: what about that pat thing you had going on there. >> he's just turning it. >> all you have to do is just turn it, you ready? >> jimmy: it looks like a pizza, it looks a little like the sun. it's quite beautiful. [cheers and applause] jmynoing makeyou elit up. oh, look, the monkey can roll

dough! >> so good thing. >> jimmy: you want to give it a shot? you don't have to. >> sure. >> jimmy: what the hell. [cheers and applause] >> jimmy: yeah, much more elegant. >> i don't know. >> magic of television. i have one already ready that we did earlier. let's slide this one. >> jimmy: this is good, too, in case anyone tries to steal your pasta. just let them have it. >> we have one here. >> how long does it take to roll it from that to that? >> for me? >> for you. >> this is like eight minutes. >> jimmy: this is like the mat i put under my son's high chair. >> all we do is basically roll this up. i like to cut it really long. that way when you get it to the table you have to do this to get

it on the plate and people go nuts. they go nuts. >> jimmy: right. >> so tagliatelle. >> jimmy: the thing we get the boxes of. this is what it looks like fresh and beautiful. >> it is fresh and beautiful and full of eggs. >> jimmy: yes, it is fresh and beautiful. i love watching this, i really do. you're a magician. [cheers and applause] >> beautiful! right? this is the joy in my life. i tell you. are you ready for tagliatelle bologna? >> this is beautiful. this recipe is 200 years old. unchanged. little changed. >> jimmy: 200 years old. >>200 years old. i learned it from alessandra in bologna. there's a lot of pork fat in it. >> jimmy: this is a recipe specific to bologna? >> it is specific to one woman in the city. >> jimmy: ah.

>> so you go to someone else's house and they're going to swear up and down to jesus. if you don't have this, you go next door they tell you something completely different. this is specific to alessandra. we got some ragu. >> jimmy: does alessandra know you've taken her recipe and are now on tv? >> not until tonight. >> jimmy: now you're teaching everyone else how to do it. >> that's my responsibility. pass it on, pass it on. all right, let's eat this. >> jimmy: i feel like we're not helping at all. >> we're not. >> your job is to eat. this pasta's so fresh we're going to say the alphabet and it's going to be ready. >> jimmy: which alphabet? italian? you know what would be great right now is a nice glass of camel milk. >> camel milk.

[cheers and applause] >> jimmy: you make this much of a mess in the restaurant? >> it's a little soupy. >> jimmy: very sloppy. >> we have a little parm. we're going to add that. i wish i was like, "look under your seats." >> jimmy: have you ever put it on your head to pretend you have hair? >> do you want to do that now. >> jimmy: would you mind if we just gave it a little -- [cheers and applause] >> jimmy: looks like yours, gwynneth. >> that's a first. >> jimmy: that's a nice halloween costume for you. look at that. guillermo, what do you think of that? >> it's perfect. >> jimmy: it's getting closer and closer all of a sudden. >> i feel his presence. >> can i try it?

>> you want to try it? >> jimmy: butter and what else, you have a noodle. >> you w finish? sh. >>o, irigh into hische. it will be fine. >> let me serve you. >> okay. thank you. >> you ready? >> jimmy: guillermo, this is italian food. >> oh, i love italian food. >> you got to leave some for jimmy. it's really long. there we go. >> all right. >> jimmy: how many different shapes of pasta can you make? >> with hands and sticks and analog tools 1515. >> jimmy: wow. >> no machines. >> jimmy: is there room for any new ones? have you ever come up with a new one? >> not my job. i'm a mouthpiece for tradition. >> jimmy: very good. >> you guys want to try this? >> jimmy: we'd love to try it. >> guillermo took all the cheese. so we have to do it again. how is it? >> it is fantastic.

iyou don't mi sring, you could hold the stick. >> we cod i'll be lady. >> my bite is too big. i do this all the time. but i'm on tv right now, i have to be careful. >> just unhinge your jaw, and you can get anything in there. [cheers and applause] >> jimmy: so good. it's delicious. people can do this if they have your book. >> persistence, persistence. ingredients. that's all you need. >> jimmy: chef evan funke! evan's first cookbook, "american sfoglino" is available now and we'll be right back with lunay! ♪ >> dicky: the jimmy kimmel live concert series is presented by mercedes, amg, driving performance .