we appreciate >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- oscar nominee charlize theron, from "succession," brian cox, and comedian todd glass. and now, pace yourselves, jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: hi, everyone. i'm jimmy, i'm the host. thanks for watching. thanks for coming and for joining us. very kind. another star day in washington, d.c. if you watched the news at all you know the house today officially handed over the articles of impeachment. speaker of the house nancy pelosi signed the paperwork this

afternoon. this i thought was interesting. she did it, she signed her name one letter at a time, using a different pen each time. she used 22 pens to sign her name. what is going on? did she get an endorsement deal with bic? it's hard to argue you're not enjoying the impeachment when you turn it into a calligraphy class all of a sudden. speaking of pelosi, she named impeachment managers including jerry nadler, adam schiff, and newly available red sox manager alex cora joined the team. they really want to win this. this is big stuff, only the third time in american history articles of impeachment have been sent to the senate, which means starting tuesday donald joanna trump will become the first former steak salesman to be tried for abuse of power and obstruction of congress. senate majority leader mitch mcconnell insisted the trial will be fair, there will be arguments there will be evidence, and there will be a verdict, just not necessarily in

that order. most republicans -- mitch mcconnell won't even commit to questioning witnesses or admitting new evidence, even though yesterday, just yesterday we got bombshells from one of rudy giuliani's ukraine men, lev parnas, who in addition to telling rachel maddow the president lied when he said he didn't know what he was up to, provided documents that clearly show rudy giuliani, the president's lawyer, specifically, at trump's direction, badgering the new president of ukraine, to announce an investigation into the bidens. not to start one, to announce one. there's a letter from rudy saying he was acting with the president's full knowledge and concept, on top of that we were introduced to a new member of the trump reverse, another shady character, robert hyde, this is a guy running for congress in northwestern connecticut. before i show you his photo i would like you to close your eyes and imagine what the type of guy who would get involved in this u-craziness might lack like, okay? you got it? all right, now open your eyes.

that's robert hyde. [ laughter ] exactly what you imagine, right? [ laughter ] this guy's a beauty. he's a big trump supporter who last year, he was at trump's golf resort in miami, he had to be escorted off the premises by police because he believed a hitman was out to get him. of course he is now connected to trump. these are some text messages robert hyde shared with lev parnas on the subject is of now former u.s. ambassador to ukraine, marie yovanovitch, "f that bitch, wow, can't believe trump hasn't fired this bitch, i'll get right on in that." when confronted he wrote to a reporter from "the daily beast," how low can little adam bull schiff go to take some texts my buddies and i wrote while we had a few drinks to some dweeb i met a few times, bull schiff is a

desperate turd. ah, the old drunk buddy turd defense, works every time. he was drunk and texting his buddies in the ukraine? here are some other things that he drunk texted his buddies about the ambassador. a woman who it seemed he was having followed. he wrote, they are moving her tomorrow, she's talked to three people, her phone is off, computer is off, she's next to the embassy, not in the embassy, private security, been there since thursday, parnas writes back, interesting. they will let me know, she's on the move. parnas responds, perfect. that address i sent checks out, it's next to the embassy, they are willing to help if we, you would like a price, you can do anything in the ukraine with money, what i was told. parnas writes back, lol. if you want her out, they need to make contact with security forces, wake up, yankees man, which i assume means rudy giuliani, who loves the yankees. yeah, nothing to investigate there, senator mcconnell, that

doesn't seem suspicious at all. another picture of robert hyde. i wouldn't want to be behind those guys at the mar-a-lago omelette station, i tell you that. only the best people. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] meanwhile, our fearless leader danny soprano had another rally where he covered all his favorite subjects. >> six toilets and showers. >> jimmy: that's right. he's back on the plumbing again. [ laughter ] in three years, somehow we went from drain the swamp to flush the toilet. this is good too. trump was in rare form last night on the latest stop for his orange collar comedy tour. >> anybody in here does not love their children? there are some. come on, raise your hand. there are some. like you know they're brats. they're little brats. they're horrible human beings. >> jimmy: oh, well, that's not --

[ cheers and applause ] well, for once we agree. while trump was all milwaukee'd up, the democrats are going at it in des moines. did you watch the debate last night? all eyes last night were on elizabeth warren and bernie sanders, who are at odds after elizabeth warren claimed back in 2018, bernie told her he didn't believe a woman could win the election. bernie pushed back hard, he said it's a lie, he never said it. i'm not sure that did much to convince the moderator, abby phillips of cnn. it seemed pretty clear which one of them she believes. >> you're saying you never told senator warren that a woman could not win the election? >> that is correct. >> senator warren, what did you think when senator sandrews -- sanders told you a woman could not win the election? ♪ >> jimmy: that's back on hbo on sunday, right? after the debate, you know,

bernie and elizabeth warren are old friends. they actually met at benjamin franklin's bar mitzvah. but that doesn't seem to be the case anymore. watch what happened between them after the debate. here now he tries to shake her hand, she kind of holds back. and they have a seemingly heated discussion. there's been a lot of speculation about what was being said. some said they weren't arguing, some said she didn't want to shake bernie's hand because it smells like bill cream and gefilte fish. cnn released the audio of the conversation, and yes, it was an argument. >> i think you called me a liar on national tv? >> what? >> i think you called me a liar on national tv? >> no, let's not do it right now, you want to have that discussion, we'll have that discussion, you called me a liar, you told me -- let's not do it. >> i just want to say hi, bernie. >> yeah, good. [ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: tom steyer's like, get

me back on my jet, quick! it's upsetting to see, because those two have too much in common to end a relationship over something like this. and in fact, this photo they posted this morning leads me to believe everything's going to be all right. and their grandson, pete buttigieg -- it's always hardest on the kids. bernie said he was sick and tired a bunch of times last night. at first i thought it might just be a crutch. but turns out might be his new campaign slogan. >> bernie sanders is sick and tired of politics as usual, like corporate greed. >> i am sick and tired of trade agreements negotiated by the ceos -- >> the 1%. >> sick and tired of billionaires. >> the health care system. >> sick and tired of arguing with insurance companies. >> the department of motor vehicles. >> sick and tired of filling out tomorrows. >> irritable bowel syndrome. >> sick and tired of talking to doctors. >> tuna salad with too much

mayonnaise. >> i am sick and tired. >> voice mails that cut off before you finish talking. >> sick and tired. >> young punks who wear their jeans below their tushies. >> sick and tired. >> vote bernie sanders, he's sick and tired. >> i'm bernie sanders, and i'm exhausted and ill. >> jimmy: that must be why he cares so much about health care. [ cheers and applause ] back on the trump side, the president's former spokesperson, sarah applebee sanders, made a big announcement this morning. she released the cover and title of her forth coming book which is called "speaking for myself." if you study the photo you can see how natural she poses. it's really -- i haven't read the book but based on just the cover i've learned something about her already. sarah seems to be missing a thumb. it's why she never hitchhikes. speaking for myself wasn't the original title for the book. originally it was going to be called "lying for a lunatic." i guess it didn't test as well

among the base. they say this could be an especially bad year which is what they say every year. to raise awareness of flu prevention and to create a little bit of mischief too, we went over to the lowe's hollywood hotel across the street where we cornered people in an elevator, the reporter pretending to be sick while doing interviews about the flu in tonight's decision of "eyewitness flus." [ coughing ] hey, sir, how are you? what is your name, sir? >> berhand. >> where are you from? >> seattle, washington. >> what do you do? >> i'm a physician. >> can you give us some tips how to stay healthy during the flu season? >> yes. my recommendation is -- [ coughing ]

>> sorry. go ahead. >> you're the ceo of a major corporation. what do you tell your employees to do to stay healthy in a confined place like an elevator that we're in -- [ coughing and sneezing ] i'm sorry, it's not as bad as it sounds. >> sounds pretty bad. >> how hard is it to avoid getting a flu in an elevator? >> it's very difficult. >> why? >> you can't escape it. >> right, because i -- someone's touching you and hugging you and doing that kind of thing. what is this pin? >> this represents my company. >> can i see that? [ coughing ] so small, i can barely read that it's so small. [ of coming ] feel my forehead. feel. is that sweaty? >> yes. >> okay. it's the flu. >> what should i do? >> pee it out. >> pee it out? what do you mean? >> lots of fluids and pee the bug out. >> oh.

>> i am not drinking out of that. >> you say that now. >> why? >> take a hit. >> no. >> come on, don't be a total [ bleep ]. >> nausea and vomiting and diarrhea? >> that's what we're seeing this year. >> exactly. at's what i'm seeing this year. >> yeah, yeah. >> nausea -- >> that's what's -- >> vomiting, and the diarrhea, it's like -- some people think it's funny but it's really runny. >> that's what's different about the season. >> diarrhea. [ coughing ] >> i believe most of it is contamination. >> touching your hand -- high five. touching your nose, bingo. that's how you get sick. >> to recap, the number one things to avoid the flu are? >> get a flu shot. sleep. wash your hands. >> all right. no flu on three. everybody, hands in. no flu! all right. we did it. [ cheers and applause ]

>> jimmy: that's why you should take the stairs, i guess. we have a good show for you tonight. comedian todd glass is with us. from "succession," bryan cox is with us. we will beight back with academy award nominee charlize theron so stick around! shishito. burrito. raw kitfo. fried shiso. french fry. iced chai. tasty. pad thai. baked pie. half stack. taco pack. lobster mac. baby back. pork chop. soda pop. kebab. soursop. hot pot. i'm hungry now. noodle soup. cantaloupe. ice cream scoop. whipped cream bloop. dumpling. chicken wing. peking. and those crispy onion rings. we are america's kitchen. doordash. every flavor welcome.

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>> jimmy: welcome back. tonight on the show, he won the golden globe, he is on the hbo show "succession," brian here. later on the show we're going to

have a game of "boar on the floor." if you watch the show you know how horrifying that is. then you can see him in his hometown of philadelphia at the helium comedy club, tomorrow through sunday, todd glass. from jimmy kimmel's comedy club in las vegas. tomorrow night, two oscar nominees. al pacino and florence pugh will be with us. and we'll have music from nicky jam featuring daddy yankee. our first guest won her first oscar for playing a serial killer. and next month, she may win a second for playing an employee of fox news. she's a nominee for best actress for the movie "bombshell." please say hello to charlize theron. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> wow. hello. >> jimmy: hello to you, how are

you, how's life? >> life is good. >> jimmy: good, good. >> yeah. >> jimmy: you're nominated for -- how long ago was it you won an oscar for "monster"? >> 16 years ago. >> jimmy: wow. i don't think we had iphones back then, no, that was a long time ago. >> jimmy: you didn't have children back then. >> i did not have children. here's the difference. when i got my nomination for that one, they do it really early, like 5:00. i was still sleeping until like 10:30. >> jimmy: really. >> yeah, yeah. i remember those days when you could still sleep till 10:30. >> jimmy: vaguely, vaguely. >> not anymore. now this nomination i was -- i was dealing with two sets of pee sheets, you know? >> jimmy: you wet the bed? >> i'm diaper training my 4-year-old, trying to get her out of her night diapers. >> jimmy: oh, boy, yeah. >> it was a rough night, yeah. >> jimmy: we had a rough night last night, very similar circumstances going on, except worse.

yeah. yeah. >> oh. >> jimmy: you know what i'm saying. >> yeah, yeah, i get it. oh, no, i've never had to deal with that. >> jimmy: you never have, really? wow. well. i mean, it's a disgusting topic, i'm sorry to even bring it up. >> no, it's very real. >> jimmy: do the kids know you're nominated about these awards? >> yes. >> jimmy: yes. >> you know, it's been a thrilling couple of weeks. i was nominated for a golden globe. >> jimmy: right. >> i was nominated for a critic's choice. yes, yes. [ cheers and applause ] really amazing. >> jimmy: like is it okay to be enthusiastic? >> yes, yes. please be. because my children aren't. >> jimmy: they aren't, okay. >> so please. spoiler alert, i didn't win. >> jimmy: right, yes, yes. did you tell them that? >> you guys sound like them. that was kind of the reaction, yeah. they were -- it was a mixture of super sad and also kind of angry. >> jimmy: really? >> like -- you didn't win?

like -- kind of like -- yeah, they were upset. the little one was like, i really want you to win! like angry. and the other, my 8-year-old, was just like, just pure disappointment, you know? and so when the oscar nominations came in it was like, you know, the third time that they were like, now they're suspicious. they're just like -- will you win this time? there's a good shot i'm probably not going to win. and my oldest just went, well, this sounds like a waste of time. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: have you figured out like your plan for the oscars? who you will bring? will you bring a date to the oscars? >> yes, i'm taking -- i usually take my mom. it's usually a mom/daughter night. >> jimmy: gotcha. >> she's fun. >> jimmy: are you still watching "the bachelor"? >> yes. >> jimmy: you are. do you like this season so far? >> yes, it's really good, don't you think it's good? >> jimmy: well, you know. none of them are really good. [ laughter ] >> wait. explain that to me.

how can you say such a thing? >> jimmy: well, because it's a huge waste of time. [ laughter ] it's similar to what your kids were saying. >> got it. >> jimmy: i sometimes look at all the hours that i've logged watching the show. >> yes, yes. >> jimmy: and i think about the languages i could have learned to speak. >> let's be honest. that was never going to happen anyway. >> jimmy: you know, that's true. >> so you might as well have something that you enjoy. >> jimmy: right. it was -- >> be honest. >> jimmy: i like to think of it just to punish myself for watching the show. >> oh, it's so good. >> jimmy: maybe even worse of all, rarely is there a relationship at the end. yet we continue. we continue to buy into it. >> yes. >> jimmy: it's like, if like on "jeopardy!" nobody ever won any money. >> you really sound like jackson mars erin, my 8-year-old, yeah, yeah. >> jimmy: that's what people say to me a lot. >> a waste of time. it is true, none of those relationships -- there's some of them, they have kids now and stuff, so some of them. i didn't watch those. not as relidge husbandly as i

watch the train wrecks. >> jimmy: really, did some of them -- i think one couple. >> no, there's a few. >> jimmy: the first one, trista and ryan. >> one of them might be from like "paradise." >> jimmy: oh, that doesn't counseled. "the "bachelor in paradise."" >> come on, they got married and have a kid, that's huge accomplishment. >> jimmy: might as well put a camera in a motel at spring break. >> true. true. >> jimmy: then celebrate -- >> and your problem is what? >> jimmy: you really like it, though. >> i do, i really like it, yeah. >> jimmy: what is it you love about the show? >> well, i love the unpredictability. >> jimmy: uh-huh. >> i love that -- >> jimmy: what? the unpredictability? my wife literally picks the winner the first episode. >> no. >> jimmy: every single year. >> listen, even if i had that skill, and i don't, it kind of ruins the show, though, don't you think? you want to kind of -- you almost have to give yourself a small lobotomy so you don't pick it, then you can enjoy it. if you pick it it's kind of done, right? >> jimmy: you don't know for sure you're going to be right,

you're okay, maybe i'll be right, maybe i won't be right, that's part of the fun. >> listen, right now they're all winners in my book, they all have a shot, they all have a shot. >> jimmy: what's the worst date you ever went on? >> oh god. >> jimmy: without getting too disgusting or terrible. >> so i went on a date in my 20s with this guy who was really super handsome. i was really into it. he picked me up for dinner. it was lovely. i was like, this is going really wall. and he drove me home. and, you know, i kind of signaled that i was in for a kiss. like if he wanted -- you know, you do that thing where it's like, yeah. >> jimmy: so i've heard, yeah. [ laughter ] >> this might explain your problem with "the bachelor." anyway. >> jimmy: might explain a lot of my problems, yeah. >> i get it, i get it. he pulled over by my house. and we started kissing. and it was really good. and then he pulled away and whispered, "make out with my nose."

>> jimmy: make out with my nose? [ laughter ] and -- and he wasn't -- this wasn't a joke? [ applause ] make out with my nose? [ laughter ] what? [ cheers and applause ] >> i swear on my life. i -- i've never forgotten it. because i'm still -- i've yet to meet another person who likes to have somebody make out with their nose. i've never met another person. >> jimmy: well, there aren't any other people besides him. so -- he wasn't kidding? >> no, he was really into it. and i started like giggling. and then -- because he was -- like -- it was good. so i didn't want to mess it up. so i give him a little peck on the nose. "no, make out with it."

>> jimmy: wow. wow. "the bachelorette" gets a rose, you got a nose. [ cheers and applause ] >> oh my gosh. >> jimmy: we're going to take a break on that hilarious note. charlize theron is here with us. the movie is "bombshell." i'm your 70lb st. bernard puppy, and my lack of impulse control, is about to become your problem. ahh no, come on. i saw you eating poop earlier. hey! my focus is on the road, and that's saving me cash with drivewise. who's the dummy now? whoof! whoof! so get allstate where good drivers save 40% for avoiding mayhem, like me. sorry! he's a baby! ben, schools across the country have had to cut their sports programs and i'm on a mission to help fix it! count me in! you'reeee gr-r-reat!! that never gets old! buy a box

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rogers needs you. your silence is being noticed. >> well, the whole point of an investigation is to find the truth, janine. until that happens, i don't have a lot to say. >> if this charge sticks, the working assumption will be every woman at fox got down on her knees. even you. >> if we sweep this thing under the rug and it happens again? under title vii, fox will be liable for compensatory and punitive damages. that could be hundreds of millions. let's worry about the law before we do the pr, okay? >> jimmy: charlize theron in "bombshell." it's in theaters now. let me tell you something. you sound exactly like megyn kel kelly. i didn't know you could impersonate megyn kelly until i saw you. i spoke about this with margot robbie, it's unbelievable how much you sound like her. are you regularly good at

imitating people in your life? >> no, no, i don't have that natural ability at all. i mean, like when i do this kind of work, i like to kind of give it a shot, you know. i felt like she's so well known that that would be -- and she's so distinctive with her sound. i worked with this incredible woman, karla myer, here in los angeles. there should be an oscar category for dialect coaches. it's not an easy thing for me to do, and she got me to kind of understand why megyn sounds the way that she does. >> jimmy: why does she sound the way she does? >> it's complicated. it took us a very, very long time to figure it out. for a good six weeks i didn't think it was going to happen. it was pretty -- but i have this dog who is kind of like my dog husband, you know. he's always just right next to me. his name is berkeley. and he's a rescue. he's always where i am, that's where he is. and so he sat with me for hundreds of hours, trying to get this sound right.

>> jimmy: did he get it? [ laughter ] >> no, he -- i mean, he -- >> jimmy: that would be something. >> i felt bad, but he's committed in this relationship with me. and so six weeks into it i got a little panicked, like i don't think this is going to happen. then i did this kind of monologue. and i gave it a real shot. and -- and out of nowhere berkeley, who's just been asleep for six weeks by my feet, went -- he had this look on his face where he was like, why are you sounding like that? you're not my mom. >> jimmy: really? >> and that's where i was like, oh [ bleep ], i think we're there, i think we did it. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: yeah, you can convince the dog. >> he didn't recognize the voice. >> jimmy: your costar margot robbie is nominated as well. >> yeah. >> jimmy: which is nice. you get to go there together and represent the movie together. >> yes. >> jimmy: that was kind of -- am i correct in saying that that kind of began the -- what was now known as the "me too" movement? >> yes. >> jimmy: that situation at fox news? >> it really was the first story that kind of catapulted us into

this movement that we find ourselves in right now. so when gretchen carlson filed this lawsuit against roger ailes for sexual harassment, she was really completely alone. because none of the women really at fox came forward with their stories for a good two weeks. and there was no "me too" or "time's up" that could really support her. so she really was one of the first women to do something like this and then succeed. you know, not only did she succeed with a lawsuit, other women came forward, shared their stories, she also got an apology from fox, roger ailes was let go. it's a huge accomplishment. >> jimmy: have you spoken to any of those women, any of those characters that were in the film, megyn kelly maybe in particular? i would imagine megyn kelly, as uncomfortable as she was, she must have been so flattered that you were playing her. >> i think that it's hard to kind of relive something like this. you know? i think sexual harassment is -- it's one of -- i think the most

pervasive, you know, horrible things that can happen to a man or a woman in their workplace. and the idea of kind of having to relive it is a tough one. and we really wanted to be respectful to them, to all of the women who were part of the story. but i do think that they were very gracious in understanding the power of their story, and therefore, you know, they just recently released a clip, megyn kelly did, that she watched the movie with a few of the women, and they kind of talked about the film. and you know, and megyn in her megyn way had a few issues, of course. that was expected. but the one thing that they could all agree on was that the essence of what it felt like to work there and what it felt like to be under that pressure, that constant pressure of being threatened or your job being threatened, to them was something that moved them incredibly. and so that was really validating for us in the film. we wanted to get that part right. >> jimmy: well, you definitely -- it seems like you got it right, and also, it is

very entertaining to watch as well. >> yes. >> jimmy: it's called "bombshell." charlize theron is nominated for an oscar for it. [ cheers and applause ] we'll be right back with brian cox! (whistling)

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>> jimmy: todd glass is on the way. our next guest is a terrific actor golden globe for his portrayal of the worst dad since darth vader on the tv series "succession," you can see seasons one and two on hbo. please say hello to brian cox. [ cheers and applause ] ♪

thanks for coming. i'm already intimidated, i have to say. i watch the show. you're very scary on it. >> yeah. it brings out my natural sadist. >> jimmy: yeah, yeah. >> that's so i can give vent to all the things i feel during the day. i can do it in my work as well. >> jimmy: that is nice, that is nice to have that outlet, isn't it. >> a great release to be able to tell people to [ bleep ] off is really -- [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: it's a wonderful thing. >> it's a great asset. >> jimmy: congratulations on the golden globe, your first golden globe. >> thank you. thank you. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: unlike charlize did you go in thinking that you would win? >> it's a weird feeling. it's not a comfortable feeling. you know. so i wasn't sure one way or the other. and then you sit there, and then

you -- they announce it. and everything goes through your head like, i don't want it, i don't want it, i don't want it, yes i do, yes i do, i shouldn't have it, i shouldn't have it, yes i do, yes i do, it's a crazy dialogue which does your head in. >> jimmy: on the show you play a guy who's kind of based on a rupert murdoch type. and you go back to -- your character goes back to be honored in the character's hometown of scotland. i didn't realize it, your actual hometown. >> the story behind that is interesting. what happened was that when i started playing it, when it was suggested to me, i suggested i could play it scots. jesse armstrong was against it. adam mckay was for it. they decided, no, he's got to be american. okay, it's american. i've played more americans than anything. yeah, okay. so we did it. then in the first episode, born in quebec, canada. so that's fine, quebec, canada.

vermont, yeah, okay. so i went through nine episodes. on the ninth episode, peter friedman, who plays frank, who i keep firing and rehiring, he comes up to me, you know they've changed your birthplace. and i said, what do you mean they've changed my birthplace? he said, yeah, you're no longer born in quebec, canada. i said, where am i born? he said, hang on. he took out his device. here we are, dundee, scotland. and i said, but that's where i was born. what's going on? [ applause ] >> jimmy: it had to have been coincidence. >> i went up to brilliant jesse armstrong. >> jimmy: creator of the show. >> fantastic. and i said, what, what, what? he said, we thought it would be a little surprise. i said, a surprise? you've just done my head in for nine episodes. >> jimmy: so then you go there to shoot. >> i go there to shoot. >> jimmy: is that -- to go home, to have a homecoming like that,

is that an overwhelming experience? >> yeah. i have a very elderly sister who lives there. i do go home to dundee quite a lot. in this -- in these circumstances it was the most odd thing. because i was playing a man who was going back to his hometown who didn't want to have anything to do with his hometown. and clearly hated it and clearly was unhappy. and i had to -- and me in life, i was perfectly happy with my hometown. >> jimmy: right. >> so it was a bit of a stretch. >> jimmy: it was almost like you had to act there. >> i had to act. >> jimmy: this is unfair. >> i had to earn my wages. >> jimmy: it's an imposition. >> i didn't expect that. >> jimmy: did you have old friends show up on set? >> no, no, no, no, no. >> jimmy: anybody ask you for money? >> no, no. my friends when they find out i'm in town tend to disappear. >> jimmy: they do? so what a great quality. >> yeah, i know. i envy it. i mean, other people envy it in me, that i can actually -- turn up somewhere and everybody goes. >> jimmy: where do you live now?

>> i live in brooklyn. >> jimmy: wow, how long have you been there? >> i've been there now 11 years. >> jimmy: do you find now because of the big popularity of this show that brooklyn nights are approaching you everywhere? >> if i could find brooklyn it's i'd be happy. i live in that area of metro tech, which is great. the genuine brooklynites i think have been pushed out somewhat. i like brooklyn. >> jimmy: what's your favorite thing about living in brooklyn? >> going down to the pier and walking along the front and going down to dumbo. i just love that whole area of the water around there, that's great. >> jimmy: yeah, yeah. boy, i never would have guessed you lived in brooklyn, no, i never would have guessed either. >> jimmy: and do you know now, are you aware of what will happen in season three of the show? >> no. thing is, jimmy, we don't know, we never know. when i started the show, i kind of wanted to be prepared, i

wanted to know what i'm doing next. doesn't happen. they've done the bible, they know the book, they've done all the writing on it. and it's always, you get the writing just in time to learn it. and that's -- and then you, oh! oh, this -- oh, oh! oh, whoa! it's like that. all this is happening. >> jimmy: any chance they will change your birthplace again? [ laughter ] >> no. >> jimmy: they will not. >> i hope not, i really hope not. no, i hope not. i mean, that was -- that was difficult. >> jimmy: well, the show is so good. i mean, it's really -- >> thank you, thank you. >> jimmy: i can imagine that when you signed up for this, you didn't know what a sensation it would become. >> no, i've been doing this game for quite a few weeks. and i just thought -- you know, to myself i just thought, this doesn't come along -- hasn't come along too often in my career. and i could smell it. you can smell something. i could smell the script. i could smell the whole situation. adam mckay, jesse.

i just thought, oh, here, this is it. this is something. and it has turned out to be. >> jimmy: i want you to know, i mean this as the highest possible compliment, you are a real son of a bitch on that show. [ cheers and applause ] really. >> years of practice. >> jimmy: well, brian cox, everybody. watch seasons one and two of "succession" on hbo. when we return, we go all the way to las vegas for a comedian, todd glass. [ cheers and applause ] ♪

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>> jimmy: i want to thank charlize theron and brian cox, apologies to matt damon. we did run out of time for him. "nightline" is next, but first, you can see this man january 25th in new york at the murmrrmu theater, on january 25th, and in pittsburgh at the arcade comedy theater january 30th to february 1st. please welcome comedy's national treasure todd glass.

>> shut up. there you go. no big deal. i know this is a little gross. do you mind if i just blow my nose for one second? i got you good, ha, you're so stupid, you fell for it! look at all the people in the audience at home, in the jimmy kimmel audience! oh, i thought that was a real blow! i knew it was fake, i'm not stupid. you're so mad sitting in your house, like oh! look at this audience! they can't laugh at themselves anymore, that's the problem with america. all right, guys. don't worry, i don't do mean crowd work. people are afraid to sit up front at comedy clubs. i get it, they're nervous. watch this. i like your shirt. that's funny, sure. ladies and gentlemen, if i could have your attention for one second. ♪ can i get some reverb? i want to talk to anybody in the audience that's a city planner.

if you're in this crowd today and you're a city planner, or the audience at home. remember, there's one person watching that's a city planner, so enjoy this. you, and you. but if you're a city planner, and in your city one street turns into another street, elm street turns into fort, you shouldn't be a city planner! answer that question. that will confuse people. oh, there's two elm streets, and you're a city planner, you shouldn't be a city planner! enough, don't make a big deal about it. thank you. i want to talk -- give me a little something. ♪ i want to talk to some guys in the audience, and i'm being very serious, that have a long dirty toenail. you know who you are.

there might be some guys going, oh my god, i have a long dirty toenail. it's probably not you. i'm talking -- you know. it's disgusting and dirty. i'm going to tell you something and i mean it. i mean it. i'm not just being vicious. if you have a long dirty toenail, you also have a dirty ass. yes. with some proof. what are the odds? could it be true? yes. what are the odds that what everybody sees. every day you keep that vile and disgusting, but what nobody might ever see, your ass, that you're scrubbing with soap? all right, bring it down. by the way, the later you're up, no segues. the later you're up, the more ads think you're tired. are you tired of old-fashioned irons? nobody cares. who's tired of -- are you tired of old-fashioned irons melting all your suits and ties? that doesn't even happen. oh, my suits and ties are one big puddle of suits and ties!

guys, what happened to the new suits i got you? >> they melted! >> i got you four new suits each. >> they melted, idiot! >> every suit you have melted. >> yes! >> how the hell did they melt? what about the bowties? >> they melted! >> every bowtie melted? >> yes! >> how the hell did they melt? >> we ironed the old-fashioned way! >> maybe it's true. i want to talk to you about this. i want to leave you with this, ladies and gentlemen. i'd like to do an improv song, hit everybody in the audience. we're going to go and go and go, get everybody in the audience. these are not planned people in the audience. but i'll come up with a little somebody on everybody, go around the room, hit everybody in the audience, never stop. what is your name? tyler? favorite color? blue? here we go. hit me up with something, john. ♪ wow. i love the sound of the piano. ♪ my name's tyler tyler tyler tyler tyler tyler tyler tyler

tyler tyler tyler tyler tyler tyler ♪ ♪ i like blue blue blue blue blue blue blue blue blue blue blue blue blue blue blue blue blue blue blue blue blue blue blue blue ♪ ♪ you've got shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt ♪ ♪ you're right there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there ♪ ♪ look at you la la la la ♪ >> jimmy: all right, i think we got it. todd glass, everybody. comedy's national treasure lighting up the vegas strip. that's our show. thank you for watching, good night!

this is "nightline." >> tonight, medical pains. staggering bills adding insult to injury. >> i was like, wait a minute. did you just say that i owe $71,000? >> facing financial ruin from one accident, and he's a doctor. millions of americans at risk. now overdue help for out-of-control bills. plus putting the wow in bow wow. inside the world of creative competitive dog grooming. turning heads and tails. pooches pampered and puffed while groomers fight rumors. >> some people think we tranquilize her to lay on the table so calmly like