Skip to main content

tv   Jimmy Kimmel Live  ABC  January 22, 2021 11:35pm-12:37am PST

11:35 pm
have the weekend. >> for all of us here, we ♪ ba ba da ba ba da ba ♪ ♪ ba da ba ba da ba ba da ba ♪ ♪ jimmy kimmel live ♪ ridiculous. back at home! >> jimmy: hello and thanks for watching. i'm jimmy, i'm the host of the show. gentlemen and gentle women, wherever you are. i now yield the floor to myself. it was a day of reckoning in washington, as the house of representatives voted to impeach donald trump. again. this was the scene inside the capitol, ahead of today's vote. members of the national guard getting rest under the watchful eye of president lincoln. look at this. donald trump has turned this country into a banksy painting. unlike the first one, this was a bipartisan impeachment. every democrat, and a handful of
11:36 pm
republicans, ten of them in the house, voted to throw trump out in protest for his role organizing, mobilizing, and inciting the violent attack on them last week. these people attacked them. they tried to get the vice president. they tried to stop our election. and these jackholes today were like, "this is another political attack on our president." your president gave a big, i mean little, thumbs up to an army of morons marching down the street, kicking in doors, killing a police officer, and smearing their feces all over your office. and most of these republicans are like, "well, you know, the office did need some freshening up." some color on the walls is nice. but as a result of that action, donald trump becomes the first u.s. president to be impeached twice. i wonder if he's tired of all the winning yet? whatever they've said and done to support him in the past, i do want to commend those republicans in the house who voted to hold trump accountable. that's a real act of courage and should be treated as such.
11:37 pm
it's not just a political risk. these trump nuts will come to their house. but the rest of them, it's always a surprise to see how crazy some of our elected officials are. and that was fully on display today as they supported their sad orange man. >> this is merely the culmination of a four-year effort to overturn the will of the people and the results of the 2016 election. >> robert de niro said that he wanted to punch the president in the face. >> he specifically told the crowd to protest peacefully and patriotic. and the vast majority of them did. >> some have cited the metaphor that the president lit the flame? well, they lit actual flames. actual fires. >> madonna thought about blowing up the white house. >> i call bull crap. >> he did say he wanted people to fight like hell or we're not going to have a country anymore, but that's obviously standard hyperbole. >> kathy griffin held up a likeness of the president's beheaded head. >> president trump has held over 600 rallies in the last four
11:38 pm
years, none of them included assaulting police, destroying businesses, or burning down cities. >> jimmy: well, one of them did. on wednesday. and that's why we're here. pushing this idea that the attack on the capitol last week bore any resemblance to the black lives matters protests over the summer, it's not just dumb, it's disgusting. stop comparing protesters marching to protect their rights with anarchists storming an election to strip us of ours. stop it. you sound stupid. "tannibal lecter" himself weighed in today. not on twitter, because he is not allowed on twitter anymore. he did it the old-fashioned way. while the house was debating whether or not he should finish out the week, trump issued a carefully worded by someone else statement that says, "in light of reports of more demonstrations, i urge that there must be no violence, no lawbreaking, no vandalism of any kind. this is not what i stand for, this is not what america stands for. i call on all americans to help
11:39 pm
ease tensions and calm tempers. thank you." wink wink. seems like ivanka managed to slip an ambien into his mcflurry. because he put out another one of the stilted hostage videos they force him to make, too, calling for calm in the most scripted way possible, a week after he should have done it. according to cnn, one of trump's advisors says that he is "clueless to what any of this means internationally or historically." but he is apparently worried about how it could affect the trump brand, and from that standpoint, he is air force done. the pizza hut endorsement deals are gone. there will be ramifications for donald trump in the future, and there will be ramifications for those who stormed the capitol too. there have been more than 70 arrests so far, hundreds are expected. as people are looking at the photos and video and going, hey, i went to school with that guy, then they call the fbi to turn them in. this was one of the odder things to come out of this. there were many bizarre characters who took part in the siege, with goat horns and flag
11:40 pm
jackets and whatnot. there were even some celebrity look-alikes too. >> chuck norris, now setting the record straight, he says he was not at the deadly capitol riots last week. an attendee you can see here posted a photo on instagram. some people say it looks just like chuck norris. >> jimmy: and they are right. it does look like chuck norris, except the fact that chuck norris is 80 years old now. the only thing chuck norris is storming nowadays is the bathroom at 4:00 a.m. so walker, texas ranger was not there, but this former olympian was. >> also allegedly seen in the crowd inside the capitol, five-time olympic medalist klete keller who appeared to be wearing a team usa jacket. >> jimmy: that's what happens when you swallow a gallon of chlorine a week since you were 6. this guy, who stole nancy pelosi's lectern, allegedly, was released this week on $25,000 bail. and the lectern was released too.feel
11:41 pm
the lectern returns. took them a couple days to scrub all the florida off of it, but it should be good to go. the other thing republicans were popping off about today was the metal detector. they beefed up the security at the capitol today, because of that whole angry mob thing, so now lawmakers have to go through a metal detector on the way in. and some of them are pretty mad about it. jim jordan was whining it violated his constitutional rights. hey, jim, just do what you normally do when something's being violated, look the other way. "molested? all i saw was an inverted leglock!" not to mention the irony that american schoolkids have to do this every day because they refuse to act on gun control. but that was lost entirely on the human bedbug slash congressman, devin nunes. >> i'm not joking, when you talk about the fall of the soviet union, what did they start to do? they started to crack down, they started to crack down on people. that's what you see here. they're not allowing republicans to offer amendments. we have to go through
11:42 pm
magnetometers to get checked before we go on the house floor, that was new tonight, as if we're criminals. >> jimmy: as if you are not. why are you so worried about magnetometers? what are you trying to sneak in? are you worried we'll find out you eat pennies? >> what's happening is american people aren't hearing the truth, they aren't getting news, they get on social media and they're not free to express their feelings. you have the rest of the clowns out putting this poison out to the american people when you're exactly right. look, the president makes a lot of mistakes. all presidents make mistakes. >> jimmy: honk, honk. seltzer bottle. the reason the house voted to impeach today was because the vice poodle decided not to invoke the 25th amendment. mike pence is like one of those women who falls in love with her kidnapper. we did learn more about what went down last week, when pence told trump that he would not overturn the results of the election because it was illegal to do that. trump really put the screws to mike pence. he delivered a threat that was so vulgar, don lemon of cnn
11:43 pm
could barely even say it. >> i debated about saying this, but i have to. i have to. this is the news. okay? i apologize for the language here. but this is a quote. "you either go down in history as a patriot or you can go down in history as a pussy." >> jimmy: that's what he said to mike pence. pence chose the latter. maybe in hopes that the president would grab him. i would love to have seen mike pence react to trump calling him a pussy. i bet he burst into tears and got sexually excited at the same time. but whatever the great negotiator said, it didn't work. you can only push mike pence so far, until he snaps and does nothing. even though trump was impeached, he will serve out the rest of his term. there will be a trial in the senate, eventually. majority leader mitch mcconnell announced today he will not bring the senate back early to start an impeachment trial, meaning the soonest it could start would be after trump is out of office.
11:44 pm
mcconnell is reported to be happy the impeachment is happening, because he thinks it'll be a good way for republicans to get trump out of their hairpieces. i've seen some liberals praising mitch mcconnell for doing the right thing here, but that, i don't know, that's nonsense to me. mitch mcconnell has known trump was a dangerous idiot since day one. donald trump sided with vladimir putin over our own intelligence agencies, he said he was "in love" with kim jong-un, he gassed a crowd of peaceful protesters so he could take a picture with an upside-down bible, he withheld military aid from an ally nation in exchange for imaginary dirt on joe biden's son, he drew on a map with a sharpie, to lie about a hurricane. he claimed the pandemic, the reason we're all still in our houses after 10 months, would magically go away and be cured by drinking bleach. and during all that and more, mitch mcconnell stood by, quietly. he was fine with all of that, because it meant he could get what he wanted. he squeezed trump for every little droplet of self-tanner he
11:45 pm
could. now once the guy's out of office, suddenly it's too much. so before we pat that little mitch on his dorsal fin, remember that this president is dangerous because he was never checked or balanced by congress. mitch mcconnell is 100% complicit in the violence and chaos he had the temerity to denounce this week. and yes, i did say temerity. and i don't regret it. i'll probably say it again. all right. i think we need a palate cleanser. i need a palate cleanser, anyway. because it has been a difficult couple of weeks. i want to revisit something wonderful. about a year ago we got hold of a local news clip from michigan of a delightful man named freddie, frederick miller, in line for the grand opening of a new cannabis dispensary, cannabis was legalized and freddie was ready for it. >> i want to try some edibles. like, i'm really interested in that. because my experience, i've only ever had, like, maybe home baked, i guess.
11:46 pm
yeah i'm probably going to sit on the couch and smoke a bowl. and i don't know, check out, like, the new dracula on netflix. i've heard good things, man, i'm excited. >> jimmy: naturally i set out to find this magical creature and welcome him into my life. everyone loved him. and it's been a year since then. we want to catch up with freddie. with us now from his new job at cannabis to wellness in buchanan, michigan, is freddie miller. how are you? >> hey, jimmy, man. it's been a long time, dude. >> jimmy: feels like it's been 30 years since i saw you last. congratulations. >> yeah. >> jimmy: congratulations on the job. when we met you, you were in line at a dispensary, now you're working at one. how did that happen? >> i have no idea, man, you tell me. no, i went on your show, man. and just -- next thing i know, dude, i'm getting calls like left and right from dispensaries. i mean, jimmy, i was like
11:47 pm
unemployed, living with my mom, god bless her. now i've been offered some of these jobs. and i met rick from cannabis to wellness. because he invited me out to be his -- his first recreational customer, right? and man, i just love -- i fell in love with him. he owns his own pot store, he's the nicest guy in the world. geez, man. i don't know. >> jimmy: how's your mom? are you still living with your mom or did you move out? >> oh -- oh, no, i moved out, yep. >> jimmy: moved out, yeah. was she happy? >> 30 years old, maybe. she's super happy for me, man. she's stoked, yeah. >> jimmy: what's your job title there at the store? what do you do specifically? i be a budtender. but my boss calls me a weed ambassador, which i think is way more fitting. >> jimmy: because he doesn't want you touching the cash register? why are you not a budtender?
11:48 pm
>> oh, no, no. no, i budtend too. >> jimmy: oh, okay, all right. >> it's a title, yeah. you know, with the -- go ahead. >> jimmy: do you get an employee discount at the store? >> oh, yeah, man. christmas time, he gave us 50% off. >> jimmy: oh! oh, rick sounds like a real santa claus. >> and time off, too. >> jimmy: what's the hot strain right now? what are you recommending for people right now? >> oh, man. well, oh, gee. you know, we just used to be weed, you know. then i got at a dispensary. i've fallen in love with a couple of -- i don't know, i got this indica called grim bastard, i like it, it's a real paralyzer, man. in fact, jimmy, i -- rick lets me write a newsletter. i get to do a piece of a newsletter where i review strains and pair them with horror movies. fittingly, the grim bastard went
11:49 pm
right along with "the night of the living dead." also insatiable, munchies, man. you're not going to be the only one eating, right? >> jimmy: yeah, well, you've got a good point there. you made the cover of a magazine. we have the cover here, i believe. >> oh, you got it, yeah? "sensi" magazine, yeah. >> jimmy: "sensi," okay. >> i met the publisher through your little clip, man. she invited me up to a couple of events up in michigan. it's pretty awesome. janie cooper is her name. >> jimmy: do you have a girlfriend or a boyfriend or anything like that? >> girlfriend or boyfriend? >> jimmy: yeah. >> oh, man. dude, i've been single for like eight years, bro. >> jimmy: was that because you were living with your mom and it was weird to bring people home? >> that might have something to do with it, maybe. i mean, you know -- my mom's really sweet. i'd bring anyone to come home to meet my mom.
11:50 pm
>> jimmy: i sure would wish you would be the bachelor next time around, i think that would be a lot of fun. i'm going to speak to abc about that. well, i have to say i just wanted to check in. because i needed a dose of positive energy. and once again, you delivered, freddie. so thank you very much. >> thank you, man. >> jimmy: it's great to see you. >> real quick i got a joke for you. >> jimmy: oh, great, okay. >> insurrection, right, cool. i had this brilliant idea. i was smoking the other day and i thought, man. fy could insurrect the insurrect, get in there, maybe smoke a lot of weed, talk to a lot of disgruntled people. then you could stop the insurrection before it ever even started. what do you think about that? >> jimmy: well -- i think it needs a little bit of refining. yeah. i think you need to sleep on it. all right, thanks, freddie. be safe, don't forget to sanitize your bong, okay?
11:51 pm
>> of course, yeah. >> jimmy: that's freddie. thanks, freddie. we've got a good show for you tonight. carrie coon is with us. music from beach bunny. be right back with bryan cranston! thanks for the big mac. yeah, thanks for driving! ♪ ♪ wait, what are we listening to?
11:52 pm
get it at mcdonald's when you get two of your faves for just six bucks. ♪ ♪ ♪ smooth driving pays off. ♪ with allstate, the safer you drive the more you save. ♪ you never been in better hands. allstate. click or call for a quote today. ♪ ♪
11:53 pm
you never been in bett♪r hands. drive safe. what'll we do with our son gone off to college? what you'll do is claim a tuition tax credit for him. which, i can help file. right here. come on, look, look, look! if you're a photographer, these props can be deducted. ♪ can i write off the wifi in my son's treehouse? if that's where you get your freelancing done, then yep. thank you! file with the help of an expert. or, let an expert file for you. intuit turbotax live [phone rings] “hello, how can i” sore throat pain? try new vicks vapocool drops in honey lemon chill for a fast-acting rush of relief like you've never tasted in... ♪ honey lemon ahh ♪ woo vicks vapocool drops now in honey lemon chill “could have been me” by the struts hey, mercedes? how can i help you?
11:54 pm
the 2021 e-class. motortrend's 2021 car of the year.
11:55 pm
♪ >> jimmy: welcome back. tonight, her latest movie is "the nest." carrie coon is with us. later, their ep is called "blame game." it's out this friday. music from beach bunny. tomorrow night, kate winslet and javicia leslie will join us, with music from foo fighters. please join us too. our first guest is one of the most talented actors ever.
11:56 pm
he's won so many awards he tips postmates with them. his latest is the very intense series, "your honor." >> do you know how hard this has been on me? every principle that i have ever lived -- >> when you left my son dying on the side of the road, you lost that. principle? no. >> i can still make this work. >> how? you're out of time. give me the answer to my question now. >> desire. i'll kill him. carlo goes down for this, he'll never come out. and then you'll have two -- you'll have -- two dead sons. >> jimmy: "your honor" is sunday nights on showtime. say hello to bryan cranston. hi, bryan. >> hey, jimmy, how are you? >> jimmy: i'm good. let me tell you something, that show of yours. you are so fantastic in it. it almost gave me a heart attack last weekend. i'm not kidding. i was watching it like, i think i might die as a result of
11:57 pm
watching this show. >> you know what it is? i just -- i just didn't think there was enough anxiety in our lives. so i thought, let's do this show, and everybody will be anxious as hell. >> jimmy: i needed some grim bastard after watching that is what i needed. is it fun to play a judge, by the way? judge seems like a fun actor thing to play. >> you know, it's funny you should mention that. i was down in new orleans where we shot the show. and about two weeks before we actually started shooting, i did some research at the courthouse there. and you see very different kinds of personalities. some like to stay in the background like a good umpire or referee. some use it as a stage. others will use it as a bully pulpit to admonish people. it's really interesting. and then you see, you know, jury selection and you --
11:58 pm
arraignments. and sometimes -- i was down there once and i saw a doctor who was giving expert testimony on murder and what he thought was a murder weapon and such. and this is intense, emotional, life-changing information that he was dispensing. and yet he was standing there going, there's a possibility that blunt force could have caused the trauma to the victim, but it's unsure how many times -- and i went -- i stood up in the courtroom and i said, okay, i get it, let's take it back and just give it a little more oomph, give it some energy, come on, guy. he could be executed if you don't do the job right, so a lot's at stake here.
11:59 pm
>> jimmy: yeah, that might be the profession -- the legal profession might be the profession that is least like it is portrayed in television and film. because most lawyers i know say it's just boring all the time. >> boring all the time. then you see heightened situations where the defendants and the families of victims and things like that, juxtaposed with bailiffs and secretaries talking about, hey, happy hour's in about 20, do you want to go down here and have a shooter? it's just a normal thursday for them. it's really an interesting environment. >> jimmy: when you were in new orleans, this was during covid, right? this is when you couldn't probably do things? >> well, we started the series "your honor" last year, in september of last year. there's 10 episodes, so you know. >> jimmy: right. >> it's getting juicy. and we came right up to march, and we had two more episodes to
12:00 am
shoot. and they had to shut us down. so we all went away, as everyone did, in lockdown, and did your covid interactions. and seven months later, we reconvened in new orleans, and then we shot the last two episodes. but under completely different situations. we were masked and shielded and rehearsing. we wouldn't be able to be close to each other. you know what i noticed? is that at 64, almost 65 now, i've been to my fair share of rock concerts. i didn't realize how much i depended upon lip reading to hear people's comments. >> jimmy: same here. >> i'm telling you. >> jimmy: same here. >> it's like, mumble mumble mumble. i have no idea what you're saying. >> jimmy: between the shields and the mouth being covered, i don't know what anyone is saying ever. i might as well be a scuba diver. it's crazy. >> i've gotten used to just
12:01 am
doing like, "oh, hm, oh?" >> jimmy: i think they call that [ bleep ]. right? bryan, so you take this job, you're going to be shooting in new orleans, which sounds like fun. then you're in new orleans, and you're not allowed to have any fun at all. what do you do? do you just sit in the hotel room there? >> well, what's so interesting is before we got closed down, at the very end, during mardi gras this last year, i was the emperor of orpheus. >> jimmy: oh, yeah. >> i was in the parade and throwing the beads out. and everybody was having a great time. it was a huge superspreader. it was the superspreader of all, that we didn't know about at the time, it was like february. people are gassed on the side of the street. but it was a blast. new orleans, they really know how to throw a party, and it was great. and then not two weeks later, everything shut down. so now when we went back to
12:02 am
shoot the last couple episodes, we were told, you really just have to go to work and go home. go to work, go home. there is no socializing. we're wearing masks and shields when we're rehearsing. and only when -- okay, roll sound, you take that stuff off, do the scene, and cut. and you put it back on. and everybody stays away. it was trying. it was, you know -- i don't want to make it sound like it was -- >> jimmy: right, right, yeah. it's a nuisance. let me tell you something, though. i just remembered something. because i was thinking about it. i know you're a big dodgers fan. tommy lasorda passed away on friday. years ago, when i was doing "the man show," adam carolla and i, we got a call, do you want to be the grand marshals in our mardi gras parade? of course we say yes, we would love to. we get there -- it was kind of a last-minute thing. we get there, we get on the float, we're throwing these beads or medallions at the end. on each medallion is tommy lasorda's face.
12:03 am
and like, why are we throwing tommy lasorda medallions out to the crowd? they go, oh, yeah, tommy canceled, that's why we asked you guys to do it. i got to find one of those medallions. bryan cranston is with us, the show is "your honor." it's on showtime. we'll be right back. this is ava. these are ava's shoulders. they square off. and bear it all. but now ava's shoulders are stronger than ever. this is what medicare from blue cross blue shield does for ava. and with plans that fit your life and budget, you can count on us when it matters most. this is medicare from blue cross blue shield. this is the benefit of blue. team it's been a grind. this is medicare from blue cross blue shield. but i think i've aged you well.
12:04 am
some might say perfect. so who's ready to show them who's the cheesiest?! i woke up feeling the cheesiest coach! cheese! cheese! cheese! cheez-it! official sponsor of the college football playoff! up at 2:00am again? tonight, try pure zzzs all night. unlike other sleep aids, our extended release melatonin helps you sleep longer. and longer. zzzquil pure zzzs all night. fall asleep. stay asleep. watch this, he'll think we're vip. wow, he does think we're vip. and backstage! trust me now? i never doubted you. i did for a second, but that's gone now, i trust you. the all-new sienna. toyota. let's go places.
12:05 am
12:06 am
12:07 am
want to save hundreds on your wireless bill? with xfinity mobile you can. the all-new sienna. how about saving hundreds on the new samsung galaxy s21 ultra 5g? you can do that too. all on the most reliable network. sure thing! and with fast nationwide 5g included at no extra cost. we've got you covered. so join the carrier rated #1 in customer satisfaction. and get a new samsung galaxy starting at $17 a month. learn more at xfinitymobile.com or visit your local xfinity store today.
12:08 am
♪ >> jimmy: carrie coon and beach bunny are still to come. we are back with bryan cranston. his show is called "your honor." watch it sundays at 10:00 on showtime if you dare. it really is some show. bryan, you've been keeping very busy in a way i did not expect over the covid lockdown. you've been baking bread. >> i -- yes. going back to -- my grandfather
12:09 am
was a professional baker. >> jimmy: wow. >> i went back to my roots and got a starter from a friend, and i made some really attractive loaves of sourdough. >> jimmy: that's a whole thing, the starter, right? it's like a -- you've got to keep it alive, you have to feed it. are you still feeding it or did you give up? >> you have to keep feeding the starter. the starter got so big, it ate my refrigerator, so i had to get rid of it. you start all over again. >> jimmy: let's take a look at the results of bryan's bread baking. beautifully done. i think your grandfather would be quite proud and impressed. >> there was a little bit of pressure to make sure that i didn't mess that up, too, yeah. and it tastes fantastic. by the way, that's not the only thing that i picked up during the covid lockdown. i want you to -- here, i'm going to do this. because i want you to meet a friend of mine. >> jimmy: oh. >> and his name is gerald. >> jimmy: oh. >> say hi, gerald.
12:10 am
>> jimmy: nice to meet you, gerald. >> hey, who the hell rose me out of my nap, huh? who's that? gee, i thought dom deluise was dead. >> why are you doing that? that's jimmy kimmel. >> yeah, i know, i've seen him. boring! >> come on. >> jimmy: gerald! this is wonderful, bryan. but can we -- you know, i just -- if i have one suggestion, could we see you do it without the mask? >> without the mask? >> jimmy: yeah. >> well -- >> jimmy: with the mask off. >> yeah -- well -- okay. you want me to take the mask off? i mean, i just -- i think it's safer to wear the mask, and this is how i learned how to do it. >> jimmy: what do you mean? >> with his hand up my ass, and now you're trying to kill me! >> just calm down, calm down,
12:11 am
we're okay, gerald. >> who is this ass-clown, anyway? i've never seen him before. he sure as hell ain't no carson. >> i know, but this is his -- be kind. what's the matter with you? >> jimmy: yeah i don't know. i think we're missing some of the ventriloquism magic with the mask, you know? >> oh, okay. i see. i see what you want. so it doesn't matter that gerald is 81 years old and could be exposed, and he's cantankerous, but okay, jimmy, it's your show. why don't we take off the mask. there you go. that's great, that's all right. >> jimmy: yeah, yeah -- yeah, okay. not exactly what i was thinking. but, you know -- do you have an act? what do you do, exactly? >> if we could just stop interrupting? >> jimmy: i'm sorry. >> gerald was going to tell us about his trip that he just took. >> that's right, i just took a trip.
12:12 am
>> okay, gerald. and where did you go? >> i went to washington, d.c. >> oh. >> just now. just got back. >> oh. well. last week? during all the -- what were you doing there? >> uhh -- a parade? >> all right. no more newsmax for you. i'd like to now drink a glass of water. >> jimmy: okay, okay, great. all right. go ahead. all right, this will be great. wait. isn't gerald supposed to sing or something while you drink the glass of water? >> oh. okay, so i guess you're the ventriloquist now? not me?
12:13 am
>> jimmy: no, i'm not, i'm not. >> who is this guy? he couldn't [ bleep ] carson's hat! >> jimmy: all right. >> you -- that's awful! >> jimmy: bryan cranston and gerald, ladies and gentlemen, they're wonderful. >> wake me up when there's something decent and someone has a piece of pie. >> jimmy: watch "your honor" on showtime. we'll be right back with carrie coon. >> i'm so sorry. >> jimmy: it's fine. ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ (quiet piano music) ♪ ♪ comfort in the extreme.
12:14 am
the lincoln family of luxury suvs. ♪ ♪ it's a plant-based change of pace. plant-based picks at dunkin' - try the new southwest veggie power sandwich or the beyond sausage sandwich, paired perfectly with an oatmilk iced latte. order ahead plus earn rewards. america runs on dunkin' i'm david collado i chose the spark cash card from capital one. cause i earn unlimited 2% cash back on everything i buy. last year i redeemed $21,000 in cash back which i used for new equipment, to expand production. what's in your wallet? ♪ ♪ be right back. with moderate to severe crohn's disease,
12:15 am
i was there, just not always where i needed to be. is she alright? i hope so. so i talked to my doctor about humira. i learned humira is for people who still have symptoms of crohn's disease after trying other medications. the majority of people on humira saw significant symptom relief in as little as 4 weeks. and many achieved remission that can last. humira can lower your ability to fight infections. serious and sometimes fatal infections, including tuberculosis, and cancers, including lymphoma, have happened, as have blood, liver, and nervous system problems, serious allergic reactions, and new or worsening heart failure. tell your doctor if you've been to areas where certain fungal infections are common and if you've had tb, hepatitis b, are prone to infections, or have flu-like symptoms or sores . don't start humira if you have an infection. be there for you and them. ask your gastroenterologist about humira. with humira, remission is possible. ♪ ♪
12:16 am
ask your gastroenterologist about humira. ♪ at panera, when we make a pizza... we don't just “make a pizza.” we use fresh, clean ingredients... to make a masterpiece. order our new pepperoni and four cheese flatbread pizzas for delivery or pickup today. panera. finally moved in. it's a great old house. good bones, wraparound porch. the pipes are... making strange noises. ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ even the plumbers couldn't help us. nope. at least geico makes bundling our home and car insurance easy. which saves us a ton. for bundling made easy, go to geico.com. action! and car insurance easy. which saves us a ton. faster, faster! they're gaining on you! ♪
12:17 am
♪ [engine revving] that's good! come on come on! [spooky laugh] now! ♪ [yelling] john tyson's motto was, " when better chickens are hatched, we will hatch them." it's why all of the tyson chicken that bears his name is raised with no antibiotics ever. every nugget, strip and drumstick. keep it real. keep it tyson.
12:18 am
12:19 am
>> dicky: thanks to the miracle of the internet, you can appear on a late-night talk show without leaving your house or putting on pants. go to wallofamerica.com to sign up and you could be on "jimmy kimmel live." my wheat farm in utah pays for my potato farm in idaho, which complicates my taxes. i'll file those taxes for you, hand them off. thank you! i'd rather do this than taxes. i'm here, hand them off. just landed my dream job. i'm a full-time hand model. then all this is deductable. you wanna hand those taxes off? that would be nice. file with the help of an expert. or, let an expert file for you. intuit turbotax live. thanks for the big mac.
12:20 am
yeah, thanks for driving! ♪ ♪ wait, what are we listening to? get it at mcdonald's when you get two of your faves for just six bucks. check out this one. long hair, loves to hike and plays frisbee... what is he, a labrador? (laughing) so, should i meet him? you're not that adventurous. yes i am! try me. ok... ...jump into that lake. i'll do it. let's all do it! i'm in. this is crazy! (laughing) you coming? seriously? it is way too comfortable in here. the all-new sienna. toyota. let's go places. these fudge brownie m&m's are really fudgey theyes they are.na. to put a fudge brownie center in an m&m's is... genius! i know. i was going to say hard! why won't you... ughhhh... ahhh! why won't you go in... fudge brownie m&m's.
12:21 am
♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ loves me.
12:22 am
loves me not. new neutrogena® skin balancing! 3 made-for-you formulas with 2% pha exfoliate and condition for soft, balanced skin. find the one. neutrogena® go pro at subway® for double the protein on any footlong. or on any new protein bowl! so many ways to go pro at subway®! it's not amateur-tein, it's pro-tein, baby! go pro and get double the protein for just $2 more. subway. eat fresh. instantly clear every day congestion go pro and get double with vicks sinex saline nasal mist. for drug free relief that works fast. vicks sinex. instantly clear everday congestion. ♪ ♪
12:23 am
when you drive this smooth, you save with allstate the future of auto insurance is here you've never been in better hands allstate click or call for a quote today team it's been a grind. allstate but i think i've aged you well. some might say perfect. so who's ready to show them who's the cheesiest?! i woke up feeling the cheesiest coach! cheese! cheese! cheese! cheez-it! official sponsor of the college football playoff!
12:24 am
♪ >> jimmy: welcome back. music from beach bunny is on the way. you know our next guest from "the leftovers," from "fargo," from things, a lot of things. her movie is called, "the nest," it's available on digital and vod. now please say hello to carrie coon at your homes. hi, carrie, how are you? >> i'm great, jimmy, how are you? >> jimmy: i'm doing well. i have to tell you, i realized this was your first time on the show. i was surprised because i feel like you've been on before. you know, i love "the leftovers."
12:25 am
i love you on "the leftovers." we did one of these big emmy q&as for "the leftovers." >> yes. i remember. >> jimmy: i have to say -- i was surprised at how normal and upbeat and friendly you were. i have to say. because you play some intense characters, typically. >> i do, yeah. thank you for that. yeah my family is really mystified by my career that i'm always yelling and crying and breaking things. because i'm actually quite easy-going. directors are always really surprised when they meet me. in fact, bryan cranston stole my bit. >> jimmy: yeah, you and bryan cranston are kind of a lot alike. yeah, you'd think walter white, "your honor." >> baking bread. >> jimmy: you're a bread baker, wow. you're in "the ghostbusters" movie, what is it, "ghostbusters afterlife" that's coming out as well. >> that's right, yes. it's pretty surreal. i grew up with that show playing on my tv in the '80s. and now i'm going to hear that music for the rest of my life.
12:26 am
>> jimmy: are you revealing something that perhaps you are not supposed to? >> i hope not. >> jimmy: is ray parker jr. included in this new "ghostbusters" film? >> how could he not be? >> i think you're right. a lot of the original cast is in it. i assume you worked with bill murray which is always -- everybody -- that's an experience for people. >> it is indeed. and he did not disappoint, i must say. you know, on bill's birthday they had the calgary cheerleaders come in. but he had already made plans. he brought his own bagpiper and sang us a funeral dirge, which was very entertaining. generously, he also got these thai masseuses on the set so the crew could pop in and have a massage. he is unfailingly himself. it seems kind of exhausting but i think he's still enjoying it. >> jimmy: at any point did you kind of -- i don't want to put thoughts in your head, but did you just go, wow, here i am working with bill murray. you know, there are a lot of people i'm sure you have that thought about. to me there's no -- i mean,
12:27 am
that's -- as far as i'm concerned, that's the top of the heap. >> well, you know, he and i are both cubs fans. he invited me to watch the game. and knowing bill murray and harold ramis are from chicago, which is a place where i live, i just kind of can't believe where i am now compared to where i started. i actually auditioned for graduate school in chicago, that was the first time i came to the city. my mom and aunts and grandma came with me to cheer me on, got drunk on martinis in the basement of the palmer house. i wake up in the morning, can't believe this is my life. when i think about that night, i was in the hotel room with my grandma. we heard banging and she said, i think those people are having sex. and now here i am, "ghostbusters afterlife," which will be the headline of my obituary. >> jimmy: and those people would grow up to be donald trump and stormy daniels. isn't that amazing? >> that's right, yes. >> jimmy: i love the idea of a whole family coming to an audition with you. >> they were there for the drinks.
12:28 am
but it's a nice idea. they had me singing with the piano player in the hotel bar to practice my monologue. they're a good time, a lot of fun. very critical, though. >> jimmy: are they really? really? >> yes, yes, yeah. >> jimmy: of you? >> well, i mean, they're very supportive, but -- for example, in my film "the nest," i do a lot of smoking. and, you know, they always made fun of me on stage for smoking poorly, not being good at it, because they were smokers growing up. >> jimmy: really? >> they definitely keep me grounded, put that it way. >> jimmy: you'd think after "the leftovers" you'd know your way around a cigarette. >> they thought my smoking was terrible in "the leftovers." >> jimmy: oh, really? >> yeah. >> jimmy: well, maybe you need to smoke more is the message your family is sending you. >> my mom has always recommended i take up smoking to help me relax. >> jimmy: "the nest" is not about one of the thermostats people put on the wall, i'm assuming? maybe it is. >> no, it's not.
12:29 am
it's not a climate-control haunting, no. >> jimmy: okay. the smoke detector doesn't go off every time you light up? >> not in this particular film. it is the '80s so it's pre-nest. no, it's about a married couple, about the tacit agreements we make that make up a marriage. you know, whether or not those marriages can survive when we let go of our delusions, just like america. >> jimmy: yeah, did you hear what happened today? donald trump got impeached, again. >> again. >> jimmy: keeps happening. it keeps happening to him over and over again, nobody understands. >> he loves to be the first person to do things, he should be thrilled. >> jimmy: yeah, well, he's got a record now. it's going to be a tough one to top. this is like -- i don't know, i think he's going to -- it's like he's the cal ripken of impeachments now. >> well, that's something. >> jimmy: are people watching "the leftovers"? i feel like that's a show that is one of, to me, the best shows ever. and not enough people watched it when it was out. are people now watching it again? >> well, now with quarantine,
12:30 am
they're running out of things to watch. all the people who said they were going to found their way to watching it. yeah, it's unfortunately very timely, about the collective grieving in society. no one recognizes me except for "leftovers" fans. my experiences with those people are always satisfying. never trite. they always have a story to tell about why they connected with the show, either through personal grief, the loss of a child, a parent. so -- then it's the subset of people who just want to know about the ending, whether or not nora went through. and i'll never tell. >> jimmy: you'll never tell. do you know, though? >> i'll never tell. of course i know, i had to make a decision. it wouldn't have changed the performance, i don't think. i know justin's been very open about it, his opinion. but you know, good art, i think when it's ambiguous, it reveals more about the person who's watching it. whatever the actress thinks, doesn't really matter. it's really about the experience that the watcher is having. i won't tell. i won't tell you either. >> jimmy: okay. you don't have to tell me. i've made my own decisions on that.
12:31 am
>> good. >> jimmy: thanks for being on. i hope to see you next time in the flesh. >> i hope so. >> jimmy: "the nest" is available now on digital and video on demand. carrie coon, everybody. we'll be back with beach bunny. >> dicky: the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is presented by mercedes-benz. the best or nothing. want to save hundreds on your wireless bill? with xfinity mobile you can. how about saving hundreds on the new samsung galaxy s21 ultra 5g?
12:32 am
you can do that too. all on the most reliable network. sure thing! and with fast nationwide 5g included at no extra cost. we've got you covered. so join the carrier rated #1 in customer satisfaction. and get a new samsung galaxy starting at $17 a month. learn more at xfinitymobile.com or visit your local xfinity store today.
12:33 am
>> dicky: the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is presented by mercedes-benz. the best or nothing. >> jimmy: thanks to bryan cranston and carrie coon. apologies to matt damon. "nightline" is next, but first, the ep is called "blame game." with the song "good girls don't get used," from the empty bottle in chicago, beach bunny! ♪ say you miss me say you wanna kiss me i liked it better when you improvised ♪ ♪ the story we had if you adore me why do you ignore me i liked it better when ♪ ♪ you sent me sorry when i was sad stop saying it's my bad you're acting like ♪ ♪ your deadbeat dad i know you know you're better than that but you can't respond ♪ ♪ when you react i'm tired of dumb boy talk of getting close you say you won't you do ♪ ♪ but act as though you don't you're not a ghost i'm not afraid of you ♪
12:34 am
♪ i started letting go you let me know that you were just confused ♪ ♪ and i still think that you're cute but i need you to remember that ♪ ♪ good girls don't get used ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah good girls don't get used ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ♪ ♪ good girls don't get say you want me actually you want me did you wanna ribbon ♪ ♪ cause i'm gonna need to hear more than that gotta show me if you wanna know me ♪ ♪ maybe you would know by now i'm the greatest thing that you could have ♪ ♪ stop saying it's my bad forgetting everything we had i know you know ♪ ♪ you're better than that but
12:35 am
you can't respond when you react i'm tired of dumb boy talk ♪ ♪ of getting close you say you won't you do but act as though you don't ♪ ♪ you're not a ghost i'm not afraid of you i started letting go you let me know ♪ ♪ that you were just confused and i still think that you're cute ♪ ♪ but i need you to remember that good girls don't get used ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ♪ ♪ good girls don't get used ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah good girls don't get who's the girl ♪ ♪ in your story hard to believe that you really care at all if when you're bored ♪ ♪ or you're horny i wanna hang out but you're busy hunting down a booty call ♪ ♪ hate it how you ignore me like for a weekend but then pretend nothing happened ♪ ♪ is that so cause i asked to
12:36 am
come over but supposedly a girl that's ♪ ♪ just your friend was in your home i'm tired of dumb boy talk of getting close ♪ ♪ you say you won't you do but act as though you don't you're not a ghost ♪ ♪ i'm not afraid of you you say you won't but then you do you n ♪ but then you do you say you won't but then you do you say you won't ♪ ♪ but then you do you say you won't but then you do you say you won't ♪ ♪ but then you do you say you won't but then you do you say you won't ♪ ♪ but then you do you say you won't but then you do you say you won't ♪ ♪ but then you do you say you won't but then you do you say you won't ♪ ♪ but then you do you say you
12:37 am
won't but then you do ♪ this is "nightline." >> tonight, true to trump. faithful followers. >> want to show him how much we appreciate him. >> despite a second impeachment and pending trial. >> i will support him in 2024 if he decides to run. >> how and why the now ex-president still holds on to hearts and minds. political coattails. inside the inauguration fashion statements with secret messages woven in. >> there's this preconceived idea of what black designers do. >> and how everyone is smitten with bernie sanders sitting with his mittens. safe at home. remembering a baseball legend. age is just a number.
12:38 am
and mine's unlisted.

125 Views

info Stream Only

Uploaded by TV Archive on