tv Jimmy Kimmel Live ABC June 25, 2021 11:35pm-12:37am PDT
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thanks for >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live!" tonight -- owen wilson, betty gilpin, and music from spice featuring sean paul and shaggy. and now, jimmy kimmel! >> jimmy: hello. i'm jimmy, i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thank you for joining us here in southern california, where, as of today, we are open for business. we are officially now at 100% capacity. no capacity limits, no distance requirements. everywhere you go. in fact, the only place that isn't open for business is our show. i'm still doing jokes for 20 members of an all-hostage
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staff.e, we finally breathe for two days before fire season starts back up again. here in l.a., we have a lot to look forward to. now that the covid restrictions have been lifted, we welcome back, backups on the 405. waiting two hours in a line at the amusement park. parking spot fights. desperately trying to get a bartender to see you. the guy behind you who yells at the movie screen. long sweaty hugs. walking through clouds of pot smoke at the playground. tripping over bird scooters. and the smell of a coworker microwaving fish. welcome back, friends. now if you see a white woman screaming in trader joe's, she's not an anti-masker, she's just mad they're out of oat milk. it's going to be a magical summer. i woke up this morning thinking about this lady, remember her?
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this brave woman i'm assuming died to get california's economy open again. so, thank you screechy ice cream karen, your sacrifice was not in vain. right, guillermo? guillermo is home sick again. the dodgers tonight hosted their first full capacity game of the season. is it a coincidence that guillermo called in sick again and the dodgers are playing their first full capacity game? the fans were back at wrigley field this weekend where they did something i've never seen before. you ever try to figure out who started the wave? well, let's remember this because it could be the next big thing. this is a phenomenon that seems to date back to 2019 at wrigley heel start tk beer cups. the clear plastic ones they sell bud in. they stacked them up as high as they can.
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but then, the cup stack craze got cu people stopped going to the games so they stopped stacking cups. until this is from the cubs-cardinals game at wrigley on sunday, where the fans were so happyto be back, they formed what is called either a "beer snake" or a "cup snake." which is exactly what it sounds like. a snake made out of cups. so i guess we're not worried about covid anymore. someone counted it up, and they estimate that this snake represents $30,000 worth of beers. and apparently, the cubs don't like it. barstool sports started selling cup snake shirts, which are now banned from wrigley field. and security at wrigley has been confiscating cups. angrily. gimme those cups, you stacker! i guess they don't like it because beer winds up spilling on other fans. but in a way, i feel like they're penalizing people for
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cleaning up the stadium. right? i say let the people stack their cups! after all we've been through, is that really so bad? i mean, a year ago, priests were baptizing babies with water guns. what's a little cup stacking gonna hurt? even dr. fauci was out last night partying it up. at black flamingo in new york. there she is. in new york, as more people are taking public transportation again, they've seen a sharp increase in subway cars caked with feces, garbage, blood, and vomit. in other words, new york city is back! speaking of human excrement, congresswoman marjorie taylor greene did something unusual. for her. she apologized. remember last month when she compared congresspeople having to wear masks to jews having to wear the star of david during
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the holocaust? well, yesterday, klan mom paid a visit to the holocaust museum in d.c., and i guess a field trip did some good because she apologized. >> the horrors of the holocaust are something that some people don't even believe happened. >> jimmy: but she's here to finally set the record straight. it did happen. and it was bad. it's amazing what just a little education can do, isn't it? she now knows as much about the holocaust as every 6th grader in washington d.c. quick, build a climate change museum! but the important thing here is that marjorie taylor greene said she's sorry. and she is sorry. she might be the sorriest excuse for a congresswoman we've ever seen. next up, she's planning a visit to the national air and jewish space laser museum. yesterday, as i mentioned then, was donald trump's 75th birthday. they had a little get together last night at trump's club in bedminster, and his son, djtj
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posted video on instagram. ♪ happy birthday to you ♪ happy birthday to you ♪ ♪ happy birthday dear president ♪ ♪ happy birthday >> jimmy: all the best people were there. although i couldn't help but notice his wife wasn't. it's his 75th birthday! where's melania? wouldn't it be great if she ran off with hunter biden? i don't know if you saw this, i don't know if you saw this, but batman was trending yesterday after reports that a sex scene got axed from the upcoming season of "harley quinn," which is an animated series on hbo max. the creators wrote a scene in which batman performs oral sex on catwoman, but the gang at dc comics said no way.
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and the reason they gave is they said "heroes don't do that." dc is so pc. of course heroes do that. you think james bond doesn't do that? you think mr. t. doesn't do that? i pity the fool who thinks he doesn't. for god's sake, mr. rogers probably did it. batman has all those gadgets, of course he does. in that suit, it's the only sex act he can perform. i love that they were outraged by this, but not a peep about bruce wayne keeping a teenage ward in his cave. the whole reason batman exists is because it wasn't safe to go downtown in gotham. by the way, you know how you can tell batman was having sex in your bed? you find the words "pow!" "bam!" and "splat!" laying all over the place. it's a joke for the old school
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batman fans. we are now about a month away from the summer olympics in tokyo where most of the people who live there are less than thrilled about the idea of hosting the games during a global pandemic. only 5% of the population is currently vaccinated in tokyo. and because of that, one of the traditions at the olympic village is being threatened. organizers typically give out condoms to the athletes, but this time, there's a catch. according to olympic officials, "the distribution of condoms is not for use at the athlete's village, but to have athletes take them back to their home countries to raise awareness." raise awareness? of condoms? "countrymen, gather 'round! this is a latex balloon designed to capture baby batter!" behold! that is crazy. some people have been training their whole lives to have sex at the olympics! it's not fair. the olympics start in a few weeks, and i wonder, does anyone even know? so we went on the street and we asked people to give us their
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review of the olympics so far, even though as i said, they haven't started. but did that stop people saying they're watching? of course not, in tonight's edition of "lie witness news." you watching the olympics? >> of course. >> you been watching the olympics? >> yeah. >> have you been enjoying them? >> the tokyo ones? >> yeah. >> yes. >> have you been watching the olympics? >> i have been. >> you been enjoying them? >> i do. >> caitlyn jenner returning to compete for the united states as a woman. how did that make you feel, seeing her up there competing? >> i think it was amazing. a big step forward for women across america. it was special seeing the first -- that takes years of hard work and dedication. i think it's amazing someone like her competing at such a high level. >> anything you want to say to give her encourage.
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>> mrs. jenner, keep doing what you're doing. you're amazing. >> which olympics sports have you been watching? >> figure skating. >> wonderful. so you must have seen nancy harding win the bronze with her torn aclu? >> correct. >> would you like to wish her a speedy recovery. >> nancy harding, congratulations on your speedy recovery and congratulations. >> who have you been watching with? >> my boyfriend. >> have you been watching water polo? >> bits of it. >> did it make you sad when the ponies drowned? >> yeah. >> we're talking about the olympics. have you been watching? >> highlights, things like that. >> you see the boat in the big race? >> i did. i saw it. just a little bit of it. >> yeah. no one really thought he was going to win. he was racing against gregg fast -- >> younger people. yeah. >> and a russian, harry runsaton. >> yeah. >>ko they're doing with the olympics?
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>> until all honesty, i haven't watched it myself. >> have you seen the highlights? >> none at all. i'm probably not going to help, however, i have heard that it's good. >> you have friends watching it? >> no. well, yes. a little bit. >> which friends? >> friends, family friends. >> which family friends? >> mom's side. >> mom's side? >> yep. >> what's their name? >> sandy. >> sandy's been watching it? >> yep. >> what sports does sandy like in the olympics? >> shot put. >> shot put. of all the sports, sandy likes shot put. >> jimmy: we've got a good show for you tonight. betty gilpin is here. we have music from spice featuring sean paul and shaggy. and we'll be right back with owen wilson. stick around.
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>> jimmy: tonight, from the new movie "the tomorrow war," betty gilpin is here. then later, from jamaica, her debut album "ten" comes out july 30th. music from spice with sean paul and shaggy. tomorrow night, zooey deschanel and sam richardson will join us, with music from kodak black. and we will have the guy who got swallowed by a humpback whale here in studio. he lived. it would be weird if he wasn't. we wouldn't fly him out. if you want to meet a man
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swallowed by a whale, he will be with us tomorrow night. our first guest tonight is taking a temporary leave from the wes anderson cinematic universe to be part of the marvel one. he plays tva agent mobius m. mobius in "loki." new episodes come out wednesdays on disney plus. please welcome owen wilson. >> how you doing, jimmy? >> jimmy: i'm doing well. >> thank you for having me. great to -- nice to be her virtually. of course, i wish that i was there with you kind of, because i like when we sort of get that chemistry and that flow going sitting right next to each other. but we'll do our best today. >> where are you right now? >> i am where? about five hours west of you. >> you're in hawaii. you're in maui, right? >> yes, i'm in maui, but like i say, i'm just crushed that i'm not with you guys. >> jimmy: you are really missing
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out. do we have that video? this is right behind our theater. we had a full car fire going on here today. i mean, it was beautiful. it smelled like plumeria flowers. it was something to see. that's hollywood for you. >> you're giving me goose bumps. >> jimmy: you know being you're in hollywood, you assume they must be shooting something when there's a car on fire, and it turns out just a good old fashioned car on fire. so you're doing well, it looks like. boy, you look happy. actually, you look -- >> thank you. >> your shirt is very ironed. did you do that yourself? >> i didn't. it's one of those ones that sort of stays kind of looking okay. so i just sort of fish it out of the closet when i have something important like today. button it up, and -- but thank you. i mean, i think it's a nice color. >> jimmy: almost angelic, i
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would say. are your pals woody harrellson and willie nelson there? >> woody is not, but willie is here. they were filming a documentary on him. they interviewed me for it a couple days ago. i saw him yesterday. we played some dominos, and i might see him even later today, but yeah, it was fun doing -- you know, the thing with willie, because he was such a big deal kind of growing up and my parents loved him and being in texas, and i still sort of can't quite believe that i'm sort of friends with him. it sort of feels like a seventh grade who are knows the star quarterback, and then he knows his name and says hello to him. sometimes eats lunch with him and keeps the other guys from picking on him.
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but yeah, he -- it was great. and so when the documentary, they were asking me about all the poker stuff, and then, of course, you know, there's marijuana -- >> jimmy: what? >> well, that, of course, is part of the story. you can't whitewash that. and so -- but i still have a thing from growing up that it's sort of a secretive like, you got to hide that. but it's -- i mean, there's nothing to hide. >> jimmy: it ruins it in a way, doesn't it? >> it does. i mean, sometimes it takes some of the fun out of it. i mean, you know, when you're kind of a bit, you know, you know, it feels like kind of being back in ninth grade sneaking out and stuff. >> jimmy: yeah, i've been snorting bath salts to try to do something a little different.
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what about willie? is it legal in hawaii now? is it decriminalized or legalized there? >> it is. yeah. i think it's the same as california now. >> jimmy: all right. oh. wow. does that give you an advantage over willie when it comes to playing poker? the fact that he is baked out of his mind? >> it doesn't. i would think, i think that was, you know, maybe years ago that was my game plan, but it hasn't worked out that way. i tend to lose, but maybe he's just a lot better at playing high than i am. he's -- you know, with dominos and stuff, i just get -- he really can -- he's great at dominos. he's been playing since he was a kid, but i sometimes talk about where we play poker is called -- it's in sort of the back of his garage. he calls it
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lounge. sometimes when i walk in because i know i'm going to lose is i say here i go again, where dreams into go to die, in his lounge. that's something my dad used to say. there was a hamburger place we loved going and my dad didn't love the place. the jukebox was always broken, and he'd say that place was like where dreams go to die. so saying that line, applying it to losing all the time in dominos really has a great ear. he's like i like that, and then wrote it down and stuck it up on the wall. and then, actually made a song with that line, and i think it's even sort of, you know, the title of it. and that when i think about my dad, the idea that he said something to us as kids, kind of kidding around that then i pare it back to willie, and he puts
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into a song, that's a great -- i mean, that would thrill my dad. >> jimmy: i bet. how about your boys? how old are your boys now? >> i've got ten and seven and then started back in school. and started kind of doing stuff. fin, the seven-year-old, he actually, he d.j.ed a party a coupe weeks ago. >> jimmy: what? >> yeah. he's interested in d.j. 'ing. it sounds crazy. he has d.j. class twice a week that he goes to and works on his beats and stuff. i'm not kidding. and so we d.j. 'a friend's christening or birthday party, but it was mostly grownups, and fin was all excited to have his
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d.j. kit. and ford went along with him kind of as his hype man, technical support, because which he needed, because when he saw all the grownups there, he kind of got a little bit nervous, and decided that he was only going to play beats and he had prepareed this great rap. he loves will smith. he has this will smith song, just the two of us. so he had that whole thing home rised. when we saw all the grownups, he got nervous. ford talked him down, and he ended up rapping that song. it was a big hit, and they had a tip jar out, and they did quite well. >> jimmy: wow. >> yeah. ford kind of as his security and as i mentioned, hype man, so ford and manager, ford decided the split would be 50/50, which fin thought it was good, but that's a pretty bold split for a
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manager. you'd have to go back to, i think colonel parker with elvis for a split like that. >> jimmy: fin is like with being the d.j. and doing the rapping, he's like the fresh prince and d.j. jazzy jeff combined. >> he really is. >> jimmy: does he have a name? has he come up with something special? >> he does. it's d.j. kid cat. >> jimmy: i like that. >> i like it too. i had another name for him that he rejected. he's very stuck on being d.j. kid cat, but i think it's great. >> jimmy: what was your name, your suggestion? >> i can't remember. it was -- i was trying to think. it was a -- it was something that had lightning, like, it was something a bit more that fin thought was a little bit too much. so he wanted to stick with d.j. kid cat.
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>> i'm imagining you dipping into d.j. kid cat's tip jar to play dominos with willie nelson. owen wilson is with us. we'll be right back. there's sk. with skyrizi, 3 out of 4 people achieved 90% clearer skin at 4 months, after just 2 doses. skyrizi may increase your risk of infections and lower your ability to fight them. before treatment, your doctor should check you for infections and tuberculosis. tell your doctor if you have an infection or symptoms such as fevers, sweats, chills, muscle aches, or coughs or if you plan to or recently received a vaccine. ♪ nothing is everything ♪ now is the time to ask your dermatologist about skyrizi. yes! ther. ♪ run wild, run free ♪ ♪ the sky's beneath our feet ♪ ♪ run wild, run free ♪ ♪ won't hide what we were meant to be ♪
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i'll show you. >> yeah, so you can run away back to your homeland? >> i'm not going home. we can go anywhere. >> i'm not taking you for a stroll along a promenade, much less an apocalypse. >> what could possibly go wrong? >> you lure me on to the field and stab me in the back. that's a theory i don't want to test. >> i'm never stabbing you in the back. that's a -- >> you've stabbed people in the back, like, 50 times. >> that's "loki" on disney plus. boy, i really enjoy that show. you didn't really know a whole lot about the marvel universe did you, going into this? >> i didn't know a great deal
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about it. it was -- in fact, before we started filming, tom was nice enough to sort of kind of walk me through the whole mythology, and we called it the loki lectures. we spent more than a few days going over it, but he was very kind of patient with me. and -- >> jimmy: yeah. tom told me a little bit about this. last week he was on the show. he was with us and said, he had visual aids and clips prepared. it sounded like a community college course on "loki". >> that's kind of what it was like. and i think if i had had teachers like tom, i would have done better in school, because he was very understanding. i mean, he could tell when i was fading. you know, it would get to be kind of late afternoon and he'd say owen, maybe we, um, maybe we pick it up here tomorrow. and i'd say okay, yeah.
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that sounds good. i am getting a bit tired. and i'd go home and one night i guess he felt maybe i hadn't paid as much attention as i should have that day, and there was a knock on my door where i was staying, and it's nighttime, and i opened it. there's tom, and he was -- we're going to continue the lectures. it was a bit like mr. hahn when he shows up at his house. tom said do you have your "loki" notebook? i was like no. he was like i have it for you. we went until about midnight that night. >> jimmy: i don't know if you've seen this, owen, but tom, this happened i think -- this probably happened before you guys worked together. i don't know, maybe even before you met. i'm not sure when you met, but
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here's tom doing an impersonation of you. >> owen wilson as loki. hang on. hang on. >> it's not that simpler. you know, like, it's not your natural state. you know, it's the unspoken truth of humanity that, you know, you crave subjugation. >> what do you think? i know a lot of people do you. a scale of one to ten, what do you give tom? >> that's pretty strong. that was pretty good. i also felt the word choice was good. the last line. >> jimmy: high praise, then. your owen wilson is the best of all of them. >> thank you. >> jimmy: and this is an honor.
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i don't know if you've had this before, but you have your own action figure now. the mobius marvel legend. did you have any say on what this would look like? >> a little bit. i mean, they showed it to me, and i had some notes. actually, the first one they gave me, they made actually a little bit too buff, kind of. where i felt it was not quite believable. >> jimmy: oh. >> and i felt like that they -- that in the early incarnations, they kind of were missing that mischievous twinkle that they then put into that character. >> yeah. >> i think they got me. >> jimmy: i don't know that they got the twinkle, but yeah, they got you and got your stick. even your arms appear to be quite -- i mean, i don't know if -- the hands are really big, too. yeah. no, they could do better.
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they could do better, i think. but that's pretty cool. >> look at the -- yeah. i mean, of course, you know, when you're going to be part of -- you get the call from marv marvel, you're excited to be a part of this mcu, and i was excited to hear what my super powers were going to be, but then they told me it was like well, it's not so much super powers. he's a very good listener.listet and his sarcasm. i guess that's mobius. >> you can see owen wilson as the listener on new episodes of "loki" wednesday nights on disney plus. love talking to up next, betty gillpin.
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>> jimmy: music from spice is on the way. you know our next guest as lady wrestler liberty belle from the show "glow," now she joins star-lord himself, chris pratt, in the new sci-fi action movie "the tomorrow war," it premieres july 2nd on amazon prime video. please welcome betty gilpin. >> hi. >> jimmy: thanks for coming in. it's good to see you. >> it's good to see you. >> jimmy: you're not in hawaii. >> i'm not. mentally, i am. >> jimmy: did you see the car fire in the back? >> very edgy atmosphere.
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>> jimmy: nice. we hand out marshmallows to the guests. >> i bet those are toxic. >> jimmy: you were supposed to be here march 16th, 02020. that was the first show we cancelled because of covid. >> yeah. i took it personally. yeah. >> jimmy: and your movie came out that weekend. what movie were you promoting? >> my narrative as an actor was i basically struggled for -- just didn't get parts for a decade. a lot of sobbing in traffic, and you know, working a little, doing black box plays about confusing war metaphor that no one saw, and kind of going home and being like dear journal, maybe one day i'll star in a movie. and then i did, and that movie came out on march 13th, 2020. >> jimmy: wow. [ applause ] >> jimmy: s ando guess was that in the theater for three days?
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>> yeah. it was in theaters for three days. >> jimmy: and then it didn't get to finish being in theater when it came back? >> no, but i think for failing for so long, it -- i think if it had happened when i was just starting out, i would have been air lifted to the self-pity hospital, but i don't know. i was like it was in theaters for three days longer than i ever thought. >> jimmy: did you feel you've been hardened? is that what's happened? >> yeah. inside i'm a 65-year-old. >> jimmy: you've had a lot of theater and things people weren't seeing. this was in new york? >> yeah. dead body on "law and order". that kind of thing. >> jimmy: that's a rights of passage for actors in new york. >> yeah. >> jimmy: did you have a regular job at that time? what were you doing? >> i mean, jobs here and there. it was a lot of time to wander around new york, i believe the
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term is high as balls. there's a lot of stoned walks. >> jimmy: walking. i see. >> a lot of walking. and i have this problem where i can't control my face. i think that i'm giving the face of what i feel constantly inside which is, like, sorry, sorry, sorry, thank you, sorry. but instead, my face is doing -- i'm going to kill your pets. so i was giving a face on these high as balls walks and there was this group of girls i would always pass who sat on a top near my apartment. they were sitting presumably across from their school on their lunch. i would always give them accidental i'm going to kill your pets face. i could feel their hatred for me rising. one day it came to a head where i looked up and one of the girls said what are you looking at? and i said, i'm looking at you. in a way i thought was, like, sister, i see you.
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but it didn't come off that way, apparently, and instead it came off like i'm looking at you. and they as a group, the five of them, rose like the dead bodies, the white walker bodies in the john snow battle, and encircled me. this is where it gets dark. i got jumped. >> jimmy: they beat you? >> they knocked me to the ground, punched me, kicked me in the stomach. i was sobbing. new yorkers literally stepping over me. and then i did something that tony soprano would not be proud of. i was like i'm going to tell on them, because they have to be stopped. they're dangerous. so i marched across the street to this school, and went inside, disshelved.n't breathe i wasrd i said to the woman at the front desk, i was like a group of your students just assaulted me. they pushed me to the ground.
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they kicked me. they are dangerous and they need to be stopped. and this woman put her hand on her chin and looked at me, and i just saw her whole life go through her face. she said five words that changed my life forever. she said money, this is a -- honey, this is a preschool. so when you have that kind of trauma, a movie being cancelled, a movie being cancelled doesn't really register. >> jimmy: you're new york tough. >> i lit that car on fire. >> jimmy: this movie with chris pratt, when did you shoot this movie? >> oh, god, before everything crumbled. 2019? i don't me jimmy. >> jimmy: you play chris's wife? >> yeah. >> jimmy: it's an action movie. >> it's ann action movie. chris pratt plays a science teach who are is drafted to go time travel to the future to fight aliens. i play his therapist wife, and
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the movie kind of follows the therapist wife as she's sort of dealing with the -- the movie follows chris as he goes to the future. i stay in the past. but you're always kind of wondering, what does emmy think about this, but you never find out. >> jimmy: you were supposed to play ann colter, the witch from cable television? >> yes. >> jimmy: you were supposed to play her in a big movie? >> yes, another covid disappointment. i was supposed to play her in "american crime story", the monica lewinsky story, and because of covid, the schedule didn't work out, and so it's just one of those things, but the big disappointment was i had spent a year listening to ann coulter audio books in the car to get her voice down. and yeah, it came as a shock that in the apocalypse being an actor is not an essential worker, and you don't have any
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skills that are usable at all. i was just kind of shuffling around in stained pajamas. >> jimmy: can you do ann koulter? >> i do, and it's just in a vacuum. >> jimmy: we could use a good vacuuming. >> okay. okay. well, she has a lot of -- i would say divisive. i'll do some -- >> jimmy: do you need to set the stage, maybe some lighting? >> sure. sure. >> jimmy: a broom, some horns? >> air lifted. >> jimmy: okay. >> okay. all right. milk milk, lemonade. around the corner fudge is made. stick your finger up the hole. now you have a tootsie roll. stick your finger twice as far ann's still talking, now you have a hershey bar. >> jimmy: wow.
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>> dicky: the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is presented by mercedes-benz. the best or nothing. >> jimmy: i want to thank owen wilson and betty gilpin. apologies to matt damon. tomorrow night, zooey deschanel and sam richardson, with music from kodak black. "nightline" is next, but first, we travel to port royal, jamaica. her album "ten" comes out july 30th. with an assist from shaggy and sean paul, on the song "go down deh," spice!
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♪ mmmm go down deh wine and go down deh mmmm go down deh wine and go down deh ♪ ♪ mmmm go down deh wine and go down deh mmmm go down deh mmmm ♪ ♪ ♪ mmmmm gal dem a do it like mmmmmm a bubble through di night ♪ ♪ mmmmmmm a so me do it right one ting mi tell woman dem get mi hype ♪ ♪ mmmm go down deh wine and go down deh mmmm go down deh wine and go down deh ♪ ♪ mmmm go down deh wine and go down deh mmmm go down deh mmmm ♪ ♪ gal go down down down down down
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this is is "nightline". >> tonight race against time. inside the search for survivors. >> the first responders are going in through tunnels working from the top and the bottom. it has to be done very, very carefully. >> 159 people still unaccounted for in that building collapse. rescuers battling fire and rain, combing through 12 stories of rubble with their hands and heavy equipment. plus portraits of the missing. the family's excruciating wait for news. >> i hope god lets them live. >> we're hearing their names, learning their stories. >> he was my pro
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