>> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live" with guest host nick kroll! tonight, seth rogen, winston duke, and music from gucci mane featuring bigwalkdog. and now, nick kroll! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> nick: hello! oh! hello. hello! thank you so much. [ cheers and applause ] hello and welcome to "jimmy kimmel live"! i am your guest host nick kroll. [ cheers and applause ] wow, thank you, thank you, thank

you. now i know what you guys are thinking, this guy is way too hot to be funny. [ laughter ] but that's not the case. the truth is, i'm too funny to be hot. [ laughter ] i'm really psyched to be here. but i actually have my own show. it's called "big mouth." [ cheers and applause ] yeah. just nominated for an emmy, currently streaming on netflix. [ cheers and applause ] but i have to say, it's a lot more fun to be the boss at someone else's show for a day. you can really make people's dreams come true. so i've been upping the budget, ordering e-bikes. [ laughter ] sky is the limit. >> hey nick? >> nick: yes? >> can i get a raise? >> nick: yeah. what do you think about an extra 80k? >> i'm just a p.a. >> nick: let's just say 90k? great, all right, super, let's do it. [ cheers and applause ] all right. who else wants something? oh, yes. yeah, writer, go ahead. >> wait, how did you know i was

a writer? >> nick: just the look. the general sadness. [ laughter ] >> i was wondering if i could park in jimmy's spot while he's gone. >> nick: yeah, park wherever you want, take a [ bleep ] on his desk, i don't care. cameron, what's going on? >> i'm going to hooters. >> nick: great, go to hooters. >> that wasn't a question. >> nick: great. all right. [ cheers and applause ] sorry, just -- lift this back up here. okay, there we go. [ laughter ] you know what's crazy -- no, that's the framing for the rest of the show. i hate my body, i'm much more of a head guy. there it is, okay. you know, what's crazy, back in 2005, i actually applied to be a writer on this show. [ cheers ] yeah. and the feedback that we got back was, "these jokes suck ass." [ laughter ]

but i don't know, i think they kind of hold up. you guys wouldn't want to hear them, would you? [ cheers and applause ] >> nick: okay, okay, all right. again, again folks, these jokes are from 2005, so some of them might seem a little bit dated. let's see what we got here. "during last week's hurricane katrina telethon, kanye west said george bush doesn't care about black people, and he's absolutely right. there will never be a dumber, more racist president than george w. bush, ever." [ laughter ] [ applause ] i mean, what's crazy is like, thn we have barack obama. [ laughter ] i don't know, should i do another one? [ cheers and applause ] okay, okay, okay. okay, let's see what we got here. "britney spears recently cut off all her hair. boy, britney's dad needs to hide his flowbee better, then freeze

her bank accounts, and generally restrict all her personal freedoms for almost two decades." [ laughter ] well, the joke's on kimmel, because here i am, 16 years later, and i am hosting his show! [ cheers and applause ] this is interesting. you guys see this? this is interesting. you guys see this? [ laughter ] next week, amazon founder and weirdly jacked billionaire jeff bezos is going to space. the flight will only last about 10 minutes, but it's still the longest break that any amazon employee has ever been given. [ laughter and applause ] yeah. yeah. speaking of people that i would like to send to space. did you guys see this? this is interesting. you guys -- this is interesting, you guys see this? [ laughter ] florida congressman and piece of human [ bleep ], i'm sorry, alleged piece of human

[ bleep ], matt gaetz, was in town this week, to raise money in the fight against homelessness. just kidding, he went to a free britney rally. >> britney's been abused by the media, she's been abused by a grifter father, she's been abused by the american justice system. we need to come together and create a federal cause of action, a federal change in law that will free britney and the millions of americans impacted by a corrupt guardianship system that empowers people to take advantage of the weak. >> nick: at first i was impressed that matt gaetz was on the right side of an issue, but then i was bummed out we were wearing almost the same exact suit. [ laughter ] now i realize he was only there because he thought he was gonna get a "free britney." [ laughter and applause ] i just love that the guy who's been accused of sex trafficking a minor is suddenly an advocate for troubled children getting less supervision. [ laughter ] have any of you been watching "shark week"?

[ cheers and applause ] well, this is interesting. did you guys see this? this is interesting. [ laughter ] according to the "washington post," this is interesting -- [ laughter ] "australians want to rebrand shark attacks as 'negative encounters.'" some australian officials have started referring to shark attacks with neutral words like "incidents" and "interactions." look. there's only one way to tackle a snowflake story like this, with my soon-to-be classic segment, "kroll me a river." [ cheers and applause ] well, it finally happened, folks. the coastal justice warriors are trying to pc the seven seas. but, you know, maybe i'm old-school. but back in my day, sharks were sharks. what are they supposed to do? file down their teeth and ask for consent? kroll me a river! [ cheers and applause ]

when jaws was gobbling up horny skinny-dippers, we didn't say, "um, excuse me, time to check your great white privilege!" [ laughter ] we said, "thank you for your service!" okay? [ laughter ] i can hear the loony liberals now, "you're just perpetuating shark stereotypes, we can't make other species feel othered!" kroll me a river! [ cheers and applause ] and if you're about to write in and say, "aquatic carnivores are canceled!" spare me! okay? these sharks are predators just like my friend and alleged piece of human [ bleep ], matt gaetz, and proud of it. [ laughter and applause ] okay? so let's not turn shark week into shark weak. get out of here and kroll me a river! [ cheers and applause ]

hey, writer. hey, writer. this would be a great segment for my gutfeld packet, right? [ laughter ] okay, one more thing. as i said, i'm trying to make dreams come true while i'm here. and tonight, i'm going to grant a wish to one extra-special little guy. [ knocking ] >> nick: come in. >> mr. nick, how you doing? >> nick: come in, man. >> i'm excited you're guest hosting the show. >> nick: me too. >> i want to ask a favor. >> nick: sure, anything. >> can you put me in the show? >> nick: oh, i think -- i think you're on the show. you're like on the show every night. >> yeah, but i want to do standup comedy like you. >> nick: oh! >> yeah, i want you to teach me. >> nick: you like -- do you like my standup? >> yeah. p>> nick: what's your favorite bit of mine? >> oh. oh, everything. >> nick: yeah, you haven't actually ever seen my standup, have you? >> no, to be honest, no.

they told me you're very funny. >> nick: oh, that's so nice of them. come on, let's sit down and we'll talk. what kind of comic do you see yourself as? >> i want to talk about my mother-in-law. >> nick: do you like your mother-in-law? >> no, i don't like my mother-in-law. [ laughter ] no, she's terrible. >> nick: okay. let me give you a mic. use my brush if that's okay. >> all right. >> nick: yeah, so then -- >> all right. >> nick: okay. >> so i say, hi, everybody, how you guys doing? >> nick: yeah, whoo! >> good, listen, i don't know if you guys have a mother-in-law. >> nick: whoo! boo! >> but i do. >> nick: tell us about her! >> oh, my mother-in-law is a pain in the ass. >> nick: yeah. great. >> then i keep going? >> nick: right. you talk about some examples. what was -- what happened -- do you remember the first time you met your mother-in-law? >> oh my god, i was so nervous, you know. i think i had two shot of tequila. but i think i over -- overdrink? not two, maybe three or four? >> nick: yeah, yeah.

>> and i peed her shoes. [ laughter ] >> nick: you peed on her shoes? >> on her closet. >> nick: okay. >> so i asked her, where's the restroom? she goes, oh, it's over there. but i couldn't make it over there, i'm just going to pee over here, and i closed the door. since that time, me and her -- >> nick: wow, she sounds like a real difficult woman that you peed on her shoes and she was angry at you for it. >> since that time she's been mad at me. >> nick: can i ask a follow-up question? is that the first time or only time you've peed -- not made to it the bathroom to pee? >> oh, in my bed. [ laughter ] listen, one time i was so drunk. >> nick: how drunk were you? >> i was so drunk. and i thought i was dreaming that i was peeing in the restroom, but i was peeing my pants. >> nick: yeah. i think it's great that you're talking to me about standup, but i think you should maybe be talking to a urologist. [ laughter ] >> okay. >> nick: that's a good start. do you have any jokes prepared?

did you write ahead of time? >> i wrote one joke. okay. so -- i don't know, but i don't have the punchline, you know? >> nick: okay, that's what comedians do for each other, we help each other come up with punchlines. >> oh, okay. hi, everybody, how you guys doing? >> nick: great. by the way, i would suggest every joke start with "hi, everybody, how you guys doing?" [ laughter ] even if you're in the middle of the set. it could be your "thing," that after every joke, you reset, "hi, everybody, how you guys doing?" go on, do what you're doing. >> hi, everyone, how you guys doing? good. i don't understand why you guys won't get the vaccine. >> nick: uh-huh? >> you know, but if i tell you guys, okay, listen, if you get the vaccine, we'll give you a green juice. >> nick: a green juice? >> yeah. [ laughter ] >> nick: okay. >> now, you know, they have vaccines for everything. they have for -- >> nick: maybe the punchline -- this would be what they call a callback. "they make vaccines for everything, i wish they made a vaccine for peeing on my

mother-in-law's shoes." >> oh, okay. [ laughter ] you're very funny. >> nick: thanks. i'm a standup comedian. [ laughter ] so i think this has gone pretty well. i feel like you've gone through a couple jokes. >> yeah. >> nick: look, i don't know if you're ready to open up for me on my tour this fall, but i do believe you are ready to do standup on kimmel. because i'm only hosting for one night, so i don't really give a [ bleep ]. [ cheers and applause ] >> nick: okay! you know our next comic from his work on "jimmy kimmel live." making his standup comedy debut, please welcome guillermo "hot rod" rodriguez! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> thank you. thank you, thank you. hi, everybody! how you guys doing? [ cheers and applause ] listen. i want to tell you something about my mother-in-law.

[ laughter ] my mother-in-law is like diarrhea. [ laughter ] okay? she's a pain in the ass. she keeps coming and coming, and you don't know when it's going to come back. it's terrible. it's miserable. okay? hi, everybody, how you guys doing? [ cheers and applause ] listen. summer is here. and most of the ladies, they want to get ready, like bikini ready, you know. the guys, they want to hire a trainer, you know, to be all buff and everything. but i think that's the dumbest idea, you know? hire a training -- hire somebody so you can -- they can make you tired. you know, that's brutal. that's terrible. you know? in my case, i would spend the money on beers, on hot cheetos, who doesn't love hot cheetos? [ cheers and applause ] yeah, yeah. if i have some money left, i will buy some weed, you know?

[ cheers and applause ] i'll still be tired. uncomfortable. but i will be happy. [ cheers and applause ] hi everybody, how you guys doing? [ cheers and applause ] listen. this happened to me all the time. okay? i don't understand white people. when they go to a starbucks and i tell my name, they always misspell it or they cannot pronunciate my name. my name is guillermo, and they call me guyermo. so i had it with that, you know? i decided to give them a white people's name, you know? so now i'm prince charles, from now on. [ cheers and applause ] thank you very much! that's all the time i have. i'll see you at starbucks! [ cheers and applause ] >> nick: yes! thank you. we have a great show for you tonight. winston duke is here. [ cheers and applause ]

we've got music from gucci mane with bigwalkdog. and we'll be right back with seth rogen. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ new customers get our best deals on all smartphones. that's right. but what if i'm already a customer? oh, no problem. hey, cam...? ah, same deal! yeah, it's kind of our thing. huh, that's a great deal... what if i'm new to at&t? cam, can you...? hey...but what about for existing customers? same deal (breathless) it's the same deal is he ok? it's not complicated. with at&t, everyone can ace back to school with our best deals on every smartphone - like the samsung galaxy s21 5g for free. pringles original, barbecue, pizza. the barbecue pizza stack.

(cheers) where is everyone? pringles, endless flavors to stack. ♪ you guys got any signal? i've only got one bar, dad. huh. anything? i think it's getting weaker. experience hybrid performance that takes you further. what about now? nope. anything? i've got nothing. -perfect. -woah... and feel what it's like to truly connect. at the lexus golden opportunity sales event experience amazing at your lexus dealer.

i've never slept like this before. we gave new zzzquil pure zzzs restorative herbal sleep at the lexus golden opportunity sales event to people who were tired of being tired. what is even in this? clinically-studied plant based ingredients passion flower, valerian root, and hops. new zzzquil pure zzzs restorative herbal sleep. ♪ ♪ heading back to school is more exciting than ever. and when kids have what they need to move forward together... anything is possible. kohl's. is someone trying to steal your butterfinger? call the bfi. whoa... i'm going in. [alarm beeping] ♪ no one lays a finger on your butterfinger. today let's paint with behr ultra scuff defense... so that you can live that scuff-free life. honey, i'm home!

honey! scuff defense. i love our scuff-free life. behr ultra scuff defense. exclusively at the home depot. ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪

♪ [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> nick: all right! welcome back to "jimmy kimmel live." i'm nick kroll. tonight, from the new film "nine days," winston duke is here. [ cheers and applause ] and then his latest album is called "ice daddy," music from gucci mane featuring bigwalkdog. [ cheers and applause ]

make sure to watch "jimmy kimmel live nba finals game night" in primetime tomorrow night too, with anthony anderson and his guest, cedric the entertainer. [ cheers and applause ] our first guest is a multi-talented writer, actor, director, producer, one of the funniest people on the planet, and he's almost like a friend to me. [ laughter ] his latest venture is a purple strain passion project called "houseplant." you can order their products at houseplant.com. please welcome seth rogen. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> nick: yes! >> we did it! >> nick: seth! seth, thanks for being on the

show. >> thanks for having me. great show so far, you're doing wonderful. >> nick: did you go for a run before the show? >> yes, as you can see, these have never been worn before this moment, so no. >> nick: congratulations on your emmy nomination. >> thank you. [ cheers and applause ] >> nick: in fact, five nominations for "the boys." >> for "the boys," yes. very exciting. congrats on yours as well. >> nick: thank you very much. [ cheers and applause ] five nominations, including outstanding drama. >> yeah. >> nick: and you're, what, did you write it? or are you just -- >> i produce the show. i bet a lot of the cast was like, wow, seth rogen's pretty strong. yeah, it's a comic book. me and evan saw it in the comic bookstores, we bought it, we're like, this should be a tv show. around a decade later, they finally let us turn it into one. yeah, it's probably one of the first shows nominated for best drama that features a character with a ten-foot [ bleep ], i would imagine. [ laughter ] that's a step in the right direction, i'm sure. >> nick: yeah.

have you ever been nominated for an emmy before? >> yeah, 15 years ago i was nominated as a writer for "the ali g. show." [ cheers and applause ] >> nick: were you ali g.? >> yeah, exactly, i'm ali g. yeah, no. yeah, and we lost to "the daily show." >> nick: yes. >> and i assume we'll lose again to some other [ bleep ] show that people respect more than ours, i would imagine. [ laughter ] >> nick: so here we are. >> here we are. >> nick: i'm looking down at my card. >> allow me for a moment. >> nick: yes. >> honestly, i posed something on the show when they called for my preinterview. the truth is i have a story i've been trying to tell on a talk show for like seven years. >> nick: yeah? [ laughter ] >> i'm sorry to ruin the illusion, but we do preinterviews. in the preinterview they're like, do you have any funny stories? for seven years, "i got a [ bleep ] hilarious story." i proceed to tell the story, they seem to find it funny. i show up at the talk show, they

give me the things to talk about, sorry to ruin the illusion. and my story is never on it. and i'm always like -- i just want to tell the story, for the love of god. when they called for my preinterview, i'm friends with neck nick, i will not take no for an answer. i'm going to tell this [ bleep ] story i've been wanting to tell! [ cheers and applause ] so, around seven years ago, i was at my friend's house. and he has a little dog that i have known since he got it. the dog was around 4 years old, maybe, at this point. and i loved this dog. i'm a dog person, i love dogs, i'm into dogs. the dog's a little hyper, but me and this dog have had a good thing. >> nick: great. >> so my friend goes into the other room. he's in the kitchen getting us drinks or something like that. and i'm in the living room with his dog. just kind of playing with his dog. petting his dog's head, scratching his dog behind the ear.

and out of nowhere, his dog, like, snaps at me. and, like, barks. i'm like, [ bleep ]. i scream. and my friend instantly, from the kitchen, having not seen what happened, just having heard it, screams at me, furious. "seth, he does not like it when you touch his penis!" [ laughter ] [ applause ] to which a million thoughts flood into my head. >> nick: of course, of course. >> the first being, how in the world -- that's what you think i'm doing in here? [ laughter ] you leave the room for one minute and i'm [ bleep ] touching your dog's penis? [ laughter ] like i'm waiting for you to go get us drinks and i'm just, oh, wait! wait till he gets out of here, baxter, i'm going to get in there! [ laughter ] >> nick: how does he know that that -- >> that was my next question. how are you so in tune with the fact that your dog does not like

it when you touch his penis? [ laughter ] how many times did you touch his penis to know that that is the reaction that happens when you touch your dog's penis? >> nick: yeah. >> my third thought was, maybe he doesn't like it when "you" touch his penis. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] but he doesn't know what i can bring to the table. >> nick: yeah. >> it is both insulting to think i would touch your dog's penis, also insulting to think if i did, i'd be bad at it. [ laughter ] >> nick: i would say unequivocally, you would be great at touching a dog's [ bleep ]. >> i would probably be pretty good. >> nick: yeah. >> that is why the story has not been told on a talk show for the last seven years. [ cheers and applause ] and i feel good. >> nick: what about this for a transition? >> do it. >> nick: last month you tweeted something. >> yeah.

[ cheers and applause ] >> nick: if it's all right, i want to read the tweet that you wrote, and i'm going to do it in your voice. >> good, yeah. >> nick: once i was in a spa. [ laughter ] in a hotel in vegas, getting, like, a massage, ha ha ha! [ laughter ] and when i finished, i turned over, and to my shock, paul rudd was massaging me. he saw me go in and convinced the masseuse to let him take over, thinking i'd notice immediately, and i didn't. and paul did the entire rest of it, ha ha ha! [ cheers and applause ] >> nick: what's the -- >> so what's the deal with that? [ laughter ] i mean, from my experience, i went in and got a massage. a good massage. and near the end of it --

actually, how it was truly revealed to me is like the -- they started massaging my face, quite a bit. and at first i was like, oh, a face massage, good. it shows how little boundaries i have. [ laughter ] i wasn't even going to open my eyes. from strangers? fondling my head? i paid for it, so might as well just let it happen, or universal did, at least. i finally opened my -- i heard him start laughing. that was what broke it. >> nick: uh-huh? >> i opened my eyes to see paul rudd standing over me, laughing hysterically, with my cheeks in his hands like this. [ laughter ] [ applause ] >> nick: was it a man or a woman who had been giving you the massage, do you remember? >> that's a good question. >> nick: hey -- >> you know, you're good at this. >> nick: i appreciate that. because it's like, you think if it were a lady and it was paul's hands, it shows how versatile a performer paul rudd is. [ laughter ]

>> paul is also a tiny man. >> nick: yeah, he's a -- he is a dainty, a dainty fellow. >> diminutive little guy. >> nick: i love that it's -- >> he's ant-man. >> nick: he's ant-man. there's no camera tricks there. if you meet paul rudd, if you meet him -- >> he's this big, they bring him out in a special case, they present him to you, they make sure there's no birds in the room or anything like that. [ laughter and applause ] >> nick: what do you think of guillermo's look? >> that is -- >> guillermo: it's great, right? >> is it raw or delirious? it's a combination of the two. >> nick: yeah, it's a hot look. >> it is a hot -- literally, you look hot. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] if you ever want to see someone sweat through a leather jacket, you can see that happen tonight. >> nick: all right. ladies and gentlemen, we will be back with more seth rogen after this! re seth rogen. there's an america we build and one we explore.

one that's been paved and one that's forever wild. but freedom means you don't have to choose just one adventure. you get both. introducing the wildly civilized all-new 3-row jeep grand cherokee l at verizon, we want to give everyone a 5g phone, on us. with all the entertainment you love. introducing the wildly civilized like disney+, hulu, espn+, and now google play pass so you can game in glorious 5g. we're calling it the biggest upgrade ever. because it is. it's back to school... and back to enjoying your coffee without any interruptions... from the kids anyway. save on home-must haves right now at kohls. is your cleanser doing enough for your sensitive skin? cetaphil gentle skin cleanser defends against 5 signs of skin sensitivity,

and actively hydrates as it cleanses. cetaphil. dermatologist recommended. complete care for your sensitive skin.

♪ [ cheers ad applause ] ♪ >> nick: welcome back. i am here with seth rogen. [ cheers and applause ] i don't know if the audience knows this, seth. but you're kind of known for smoking pot. [ laughter ] i don't know if this is news to you guys? [ cheers and applause ] that you have now created an entire business around it. >> i have, yeah. >> nick: but this -- i feel like this is probably what the flintstones used to roll joints -- >> exactly, yeah. [ laughter ] we make home goods for people like me who are people who love

weed, you know? and this was -- it's like an all-in-one rolling tray. this was designed really to be the thing i wanted to use all day. there's a thing for filters, a paper dispenser. this is a fancy and beautiful grinder you can use there. and there's an ashtray. pit comes off. and like really, i've used this thing every day for years, and it's made my life much better. >> nick: this is the most sincere i've ever seen seth rogen. >> there's nothing funny about this to me. >> nick: this is like an ashtray from "tron"? >> yeah, exactly. this is a design studio called facture designed this, this is an epoxy they use. this is an inside that comes out so you can clean it. we thought, wouldn't it be nice to have an ashtray that looks beautiful on your side table? >> nick: oh my god. this is like full-on -- >> it's weird for me to promote a weed company on [ bleep ] jimmy kimmel. [ laughter ] especially when you're the one hosting. >> nick: i know. think how weird it is for the

disney corporation. [ laughter ] >> i love it, god. >> nick: this one i think is pretty rad. >> yeah. >> nick: this is "store things in here." >> it's a pocket case. >> nick: what is there, there's a little -- >> a little lighter built into there, yeah. >> nick: and this you use for the first night of hanukkah? [ laughter ] >> yeah, exactly. >> nick: now, seth, do people ask you to get stoned all the time? what's the weirdest person that's tried to get you to get them high? >> a lot of people. i got my father-in-law high recently, and i almost killed him. [ laughter ] >> nick: really? >> i don't know if i deserve full responsibility for it, but yeah. i smoked weed with my father-in-law recently, and he's around 70, and he doesn't smoke a lot of weed. he took one giant hit while we were on our way to maestro steak house in beverly hills -- >> nick: very cool, bro. >> name drop. >> nick: very cool. >> that's the kind of guy i am.

at maestro's, smoking weed with 70-year-olds, eating steaks. >> nick: yeah. >> he coughed for 15 minutes straight. [ laughter ] which is a -- i was concerned. from one hit. and so he coughed as we're doing valet, coughs when we're being seated, coughs while we're ordering. finally he wheezes out, "that was a big hit." [ laughter ] we're sitting in a booth, i see him start to bobble his head, he's like, i have to go to the bathroom. he gets up and starts walking across maestro's, and i see him start to go down. he's going to faint. and i run over. right as he faints. and i catch him. the only place i can put him is at a table full of people eating dinner, basically. [ laughter ] and i plop him at the table. and he's kind of just propped up like this. [ laughter ] right at the moment when their food arrives. so the waiter puts the food in front of everyone, and they don't know what to do. it's like, seth rogen just dropped a corpse at their table. [ laughter ] at the exact moment their steak

was arriving. i'm like, he's fine, he's fine. and he's clearly not fine. [ laughter ] i don't want him to be embarrassed. so i get him back to my table. finally. and he -- everyone in the restaurant is like, why are they sitting down? why aren't they leaving? he's like, i'm fine, i'm fine. i don't want to embarrass him. finally he starts to take his pants off at the table. [ laughter ] at that moment i'm like, we're getting the [ bleep ] out of here! [ applause ] and we rolled out of maestro's and i've not been back since. >> nick: you can order your houseplant products at houseplant.com. >> he's fine. >> nick: he's fine. thank you, seth. we'll be right back with winston duke! be right back. ♪

(vo) the subaru crosstrek. dog tested. dog approved. brushing only reaches 25% of your mouth. listerine® cleans virtually 100%. helping to prevent gum disease and bad breath. never settle for 25%. always go for 100. bring out the bold™ okay, we're not gonna ask for discounts on floor models, demos or displays. shopping malls can be a big trigger for young homeowners turning into their parents. you ever think about the storage operation a place like this must rely on? -no. they just sell candles, and they're making overhead? you know what kind of fish those are? -no. -eh, don't be coy. [ laughs ] [ sniffs, clears throat ] koi fish. it can be overwhelming. think a second. have we seen this shirt before? progressive can't save you from becoming your parents. but we can save you money when you bundle home and auto with us. but you know what? i'm still gonna get it.

people were afraid i was contagious. i felt gross. it was kind of a shock after i started cosentyx. four years clear. real people with psoriasis look and feel better with cosentyx. don't use if you're allergic to cosentyx. before starting, get checked for tuberculosis. an increased risk of infections and lowered ability to fight them may occur. tell your doctor about an infection or symptoms, if your inflammatory bowel disease symptoms develop or worsen, or if you've had a vaccine or plan to. serious allergic reactions may occur. learn more at cosentyx.com.

get ready - our most popular battery is even more powerful. the stronger, lasts-longer energizer max. it's too dark in here. i need to get out! just calm down.stronger, lasts-longer i can't calm down. the walls are closing in. i'm freaking out! ugh, relax yellow. just take a deep breath. (muffled) let's not do that again. at last, m&m's mix. banana boat sunscreen is all about protecting the fun on earth. from making a splash fun... to exploring the world fun. our sunscreen is good for you and reef-friendly. banana boat sunscreen lasts as long as the fun does. i'm jimmy dean and ah you can still have a good breakfast in these busy times. and this is the way you do it. put it in the skillet and cook it. isn't that simple? we hope you'll gather around the table and include jimmy dean.

♪ ♪ heading back to school is more exciting than ever. and when kids have what they need to move forward together... anything is possible. kohl's. how did kellogg's combine crunchy oat clusters with a touch of honey... plump, juicy raisins and tasty fiber into one delicious cereal? it took a lot of bran-storming. get it? kellogg's raisin bran crunch. two scoops of delicious. does scrubbing feel like a workout? scrub less with dawn platinum. get it? its superior formula breaks down and removes up to 99% of tough grease and food residue faster. so you scrub less. tackle grease wherever it shows up. scrub less. save more. with dawn.

[ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> nick: welcome back! you know our next guest as m'baku, the wakandan warrior who can slap on that leather skirt and fur shawl, and still look scary as hell. [ cheers and applause ] next he stars in a movie about unborn souls competing for life called "nine days." >> any questions? >> am i dead? >> i wouldn't say you're alive or dead. >> are you the boss? >> i would say a cog in the wheel. >> that sounds intense. >> how long is this process?

>> hard to pinpoint, exactly. but if you make it until the end, nine days. >> so i have nine days. >> yes. >> or less. >> after that? >> if you're selected, there's an extension as a newborn. if not, i would say it's the end. [ cheers and applause ] >> nick: "nine days" opens in theaters in new york and l.a. july 30th, nationwide august 6th. please welcome winston duke! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> nick: oh, how you doing? >> i'm great! >> nick: yes? >> i'm great! >> nick: any dog penis stories you want to get off your chest? [ laughter ] >> no, no. i don't, i don't.

>> nick: okay. we know each other a little bit. we've met at a few parties along the way. >> yes, yes, yes. >> nick: you're amazing in "black panther." [ cheers and applause ] yes. are you currently shooting "black panther 2"? >> i don't know if i'm allowed to say anything. >> nick: okay. >> unless you want to be sniped by a mouse. [ laughter ] >> nick: okay, gotcha. we'll be very coy about this. >> yeah. >> nick: because marvel is very coy. >> i am working on a movie, you know, we're shooting a movie that rhymes with "mack manther." [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> nick: can you confirm or deny that you've been wearing fur pashminas and leather? >> i can't confirm it. [ cheers and applause ] all i can do. >> nick: you must -- that must have been wild for you, doing that movie. and do people approach you and call you m'baku? how does that work? >> it's very weird being called m'baku in weird places you would never expect, in the bathroom, things like that. [ laughter ]

then being a part of the black community, if they love you -- if they love you, that's you. for life. >> nick: really? >> right? so like, oh my god, m'baku's got a new movie coming out! [ laughter ] i didn't know they let him out of wakanda like that! [ laughter ] he's in the house, interviewing people, that's crazy! i saw m'baku in mexico, did you know that? [ laughter ] i'm m'baku all the time to black people. m'baku! like, it's winston. >> nick: yes, it's winston, yes. i'm a "tiny jew" to black people. >> they also know jimmy kimmel as jimmy kimble. right? my man knows over there, jimmy kimble. you might be nick crowes. >> nick: i'll take it happily. people genuinely be to me -- there's nobody that can snipe you better than a 14-year-old black kid. >> oh, yeah.

>> nick: they just can nail you pop culture-wise perfectly. i think to most black teenagers, oh, there's that small [ bleep ] dude from "big mouth." [ laughter ] that's what i'll get, and that's great. >> fabulous. it's not a fun one to be known as. >> nick: no, it's not great. it's a cartoon, okay? >> i'll take m'baku. [ laughter ] >> nick: in doing "big mouth," i talk to people about their puberty a lot. how was your puberty? was it a blast? [ laughter ] >> you know, this is a safe space. >> nick: yes. >> is it? >> nick: nobody's watching, it's just us. [ cheers and applause ] >> get the kroll out of here. it's a safe space. >> nick: absolutely. >> i'm going to follow in the footsteps of seth. >> nick: yes, great. >> and share a story of mine that, you know, i got caught by my mother watching some unsavory material once. >> nick: okay. [ laughter ] >> so that day my hormone

monster -- do it! do it, go for it! and i listened. and i'm like -- she's in the living room. the computer was in the living room. i'm like, aren't you tired? you should really take a nap. you look exhausted. [ laughter ] she's like, no, i'm fine, i'm fine, i'm good. i'm like, you look so tired. you should go in the other room. [ laughter ] so then she, as a mother, knew something was up. so she fake fell asleep on the couch. >> nick: oh. [ audience aww'ing ] >> don't "aww" this, this is why this story takes a turn. so i'm like doing my thing. all i feel is a shoe hits me. [ laughter ] she's like, you're sick! you're sick! it's 4:00 in the afternoon, winston! and i'm like, i didn't do it! [ laughter ] i opened an email, it all downloaded, and i was trying to close it! she's like, no, you were there for minutes!

[ laughter ] and then, like a true -- like, you know, caribbean parent. she made it a little bit about her. she's like, i can't believe this is happening to me! [ laughter ] my son is a pervert! how could you, lord? jesus christ? how did i raise such a pervert? [ laughter ] and then for a good two years i was known as the porn king. >> nick: oh! >> any time they would leave the house, her and my sister, if i was home alone, within like a minute they would bust back in the door like that. [ laughter ] porn king. >> nick: so you just had to wait? >> i'd have to wait another 30 minutes. [ laughter ] [ applause ] >> nick: thank you for sharing. thank you for sharing. and your mom is here tonight? >> she is here tonight. she's here tonight.

[ cheers and applause ] she's not in the audience. she's backstage. >> nick: okay. is she wearing heels? that's all i want to know. >> she's wearing heels, she feels good about herself. she's now embarrassed again. >> nick: okay. well, it all worked out. it all worked out for you. tell us a little bit about "nine days." what's the movie about? >> so the movie is about a man with a job in the afterlife. and his job is to interview spirits for the opportunity to be born. >> nick: cool. >> he's a man that has -- the one catch is he's the only person that's ever -- he's the only one in the narrative that's ever lived before. so he knows what life is. and how hard it can be. and how painful. and, you know, he lives in a life of quarantine, essentially. >> nick: wow. >> watching the people he's chosen so far live their lives through their eyes. >> nick: i'm just picturing myself, if either of us had been interviewed by your character,

you doing at 4:00 p.m. in high school? [ laughter ] >> i would have failed that test. >> nick: well, "nine days" opens in theaters in new york and l.a. july 30th and nationwide august 6th. [ cheers and applause ] thank you, winston. we'll be right back with music from gucci mane! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ast weather] ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ rush hour will never feel the same. experience thrilling performance from our entire line of vehicles at the lexus golden opportunity sales event. experience amazing at your lexus dealer. for 175 years, new york life at the lexus golden opportunity sales event. has been helping people act on their love.

okay? so they can look back, and say, "we did good". ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ today let's paint with behr ultra scuff defense... so that you can live that scuff-free life. honey, i'm home! honey! scuff defense. i love our scuff-free life. behr ultra scuff defense. exclusively at the home depot. your mission: stand up to moderate to severe rheumatoid arthritis. and take. it. on... with rinvoq. rinvoq a once-daily pill can dramatically improve symptoms... rinvoq helps tame pain, stiffness, swelling. and for some, rinvoq can even significantly reduce ra fatigue. that's rinvoq relief. with ra, your overactive immune system

attacks your joints. rinvoq regulates it to help stop the attack. rinvoq can lower your ability to fight infections, including tuberculosis. serious infections and blood clots, sometimes fatal, have occurred as have certain cancers, including lymphoma, and tears in the stomach or intestines, and changes in lab results. your doctor should monitor your bloodwork. tell your doctor about any infections... and if you are or may become pregnant while taking rinvoq. take on ra. talk to your rheumatologist about rinvoq relief. rinvoq. make it your mission. if you can't afford your medicine, abbvie may be able to help. verizon launched the first 5g network, if you can't afford your medicine, and now we want to be the first to give everyone the joy of 5g. with a new 5g phone on us.

old customers. new customers. just trade in your old one. cracked, busted, sticky buttons. we're calling it the biggest upgrade ever. because it is. is your cleanser doing enough for your sensitive skin? cetaphil gentle skin cleanser defends against 5 signs of skin sensitivity, and actively hydrates as it cleanses. cetaphil. dermatologist recommended. complete care for your sensitive skin. it's back to school... and back to enjoying your coffee dermatologist recommended. without any interruptions... from the kids anyway. save on home-must haves right now at kohls. kinder bueno? woooooow. it's crispy. it's creamy. it's not your average chocolate bar. smooth milk chocolate, crispy wafer and creamy hazelnut filling. it's kinder bueno. banana boat sunscreen is all about protecting the fun on earth. from making a splash fun... to exploring the world fun.

our sunscreen is good for you and reef-friendly. banana boat sunscreen our sunscreen is good for you lasts as long as the fun does. not touching is still touching protection. adding lysol laundry sanitizer kills 99.9% of bacteria. detergent alone, can't. lysol. what it takes to protect. kids love visiting kidifornia. but parents like it to, like a lot. they go bonkers. (wuaahh) totally boom it's an adventure. (sound of playing) you know ,you have to keep an eye on them. u got anfigurehings out forso hurry up (screams) they're not gonna stay this way forever. kick off your kidifornia vacation at visitcalifornia.com

>> dicky: the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is presented by mercedes-benz. the best or nothing. >> nick: all right, let's crank some tunes. his album is called "ice daddy." performing "poppin" with some help from bigwalkdog, gucci mane! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ hey hey hey ♪ ♪ when you poppin' every time you move you gotta move with a rocket lookin' at the jewel ♪ ♪ you see a pool and a faucet

designer hit the mail come straight ♪ ♪ from the tropic got a coconut smell but it hit like we boxin' she only ate the ♪ ♪ but she still sayin' toxic she know i got racks so she do it more sloppy off a can't feel my body ♪ ♪ but she ain't getting outta none of these pockets nah she ain't gettin' ♪ ♪ outta none of these wallets broke down a 'bow just to smoke at hibachi ♪ ♪ i ain't need me a plug i'm the whole damn socket came nailed down a opp come on he roadblockin' ♪ ♪ sippin' on wocky pop me a roxy know they gon' watch me built for this how ♪ ♪ they gon' stop me i was just loadin' up on the dolly i feel like fly i don't need nobody ♪ ♪ big dawg i'm for real i don't need co-signin' might go get me 'cat or a scat no mileage ♪ ♪ in the city where i'm from we ain't have no god play with who play with wop ♪ ♪ know they dyin' might just go to wafi get a 20 make it shine i ain't never had ♪ ♪ not a mother dime wop got me out the trenches had murder on my mind and the plug just called ♪ ♪ said 30 on the line need a p up in the east and need a p up in the west he ain't grabin' two ♪ ♪ then it's on to the next thirteen with my daddy watchin' get finessed on the first and the third ♪ ♪ gettin' everybody check make a block do it again gettin' everybody stretched i done made it out ♪ ♪ so i'm at you neck don't know what i want new jacob or patek flex when you poppin' ♪ ♪ every time you move

you gotta move with a rocket lookin' at the jewel you see a pool ♪ ♪ and a faucet designer hit the mail come straight from the tropic got a coconut smell ♪ ♪ but it hit like we boxin' she only ate the but she still sayin' toxic know i got racks ♪ ♪ so she do it more sloppy off a i can't feel my body ♪ ♪ but she ain't getting out of none of these pockets every time you move you gotta move ♪ ♪ with a rocket lookin' at the jewel you see a pool and a faucet designer hit the mail ♪ ♪ come straight from the tropic got a coconut smell but it hit like we boxin' ♪ ♪ she only ate the but she still sayin' toxic she now i got so she do it more sloppy ♪ ♪ i can't feel my body but she ain't gettin' outta none of ♪ ♪ these pockets can't nobody pop the way i pop it ha million dollar watch ♪ ♪ on my wrist no cappin' say he got money where it went what happened sign with gucci mane ♪ ♪ get rich go platinum i know the feds watchin' but 12 can't stop it the bales came in ♪ ♪ i pulled up went shoppin' pull up in a dawn and the top start droppin' they let me outta jail ♪ ♪ and the price start hoppin' cartel mailbox money so dirty you could ♪ ♪ smell my money i'm equipped by money if you owe me better pay my money ♪ ♪ so rich that i weigh my money and i look like money and i don't really need ♪ ♪ new friends so please stop callin' me twin i'ma say that again you ain't never ♪ ♪ killed no man so you could never fit in my skin it's big gucci mane ♪ ♪ every time you move

you gotta move with a rocket lookin' at the jewel you see a pool ♪ ♪ and a faucet designer hit the mail come straight from the tropic got a coconut smell ♪ ♪ but it hit like we boxin' she only ate the but she still sayin' toxic know i got racks ♪ ♪ so she do it more sloppily off -- i can't feel my body but she ain't getting ♪ ♪ outta none of these pockets same young still posted in the trick ♪ ♪ on a plane with an opp 'bout to go off in his i don't even like flyin' can't move with a stick ♪ ♪ called my junkie out the jungle he gon' pull up with the stick on the phone with him now ♪ ♪ he gon' pull up by six talkin' 'bout tappin' in i ain't tappin' in you ain't tap in with me ♪ ♪ before a got rich my homie poppin' doctor say he at risk ♪ ♪ smokin' wedding cake ain't nobody married in this from the street now a really married to this ♪ ♪ i was broke than a now i'm havin' all this grip need blue cheese salad nothin' added to the mix ♪ ♪ went from noodle with the cracker steak added on the list got a ♪ ♪ nothin' added but a switch got this up out the mud wouldn't hand it to a ♪ ♪ 'fore they label me a rat they gon' label me a killer too ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> dicky: the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is presented by mercedes-benz. the best or nothing. presented by mercedes benz, the best or nothing.

[pop top can opening] [birds chirping] [munching] [smacking] hon, those ribs ready? nope. ribs: better with pepsi. ahh! >> nick: that is all the time we have. i want to thank seth rogen, winston duke, gucci mane, and jimmy kimmel too. "nightline" is next. c'mon guillermo, i'll cut you out of that suit.

good night, everybody! tonight on "nightline," the groundbreaking history-making show "pose" on fx. this week garnering ten emmy nominations. the musical drama highlighting new york's underground ballroom dance culture. breaking down all kinds of barriers. >> everybody told me that my queerness would be my liability. and it was. for decades. i'm so grateful that i lived long enough to see this day. >> the show and its ensemble cast of lgbtq+ people of color in many ways a mirror of the characters' own pain and triumphs. >> love is the answer. that's where a lot of my confidence comes from. whether there be derogatory slurs, whether there be hate, i choose to persevere through that. >> the finale going out with a bang, and i learned a thing or two. >> more like a pivot.