that is our report. i am dan ashley. >> dicky: >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live!" tonight, freddie highmore, j.b. smoove, and music from masked wolf. and now, jimmy kimmel! >> jimmy: thank you. hi, everyone. i'm jimmy. i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thank you for coming. thank you for joining us. what turned out to be a very bad day for r. kelly. did you see that? in brooklyn today, r. kelly was found guilty on eight counts of sex trafficking and one count of racketeering.

that could mean he will spend the rest of his life behind bars. which is tough. he already spent so much of it trapped in that closet. there were no cameras present, but they released a sketch from the courtroom. that indicates he should also be charged with not properly wearing a mask. kelly will remain in custody until sentencing, which makes sense. if the guy who sang "i believe i can fly" isn't a flight risk, i don't know who is. but it just goes to show you, sometimes a sexual predator is the person you most suspect. maybe they should send r. kelly into space. you hear william shatner's going? next month, 90-year-old william shatner, the original captain kirk, will become the oldest human ever launched into space. he will also be the first t.j. hooker launched into space. shatner is reportedly set to sail on the next civilian space flight from blue origin, the company owned by jeff bezos.

and once again, our nation's newscasters took the opportunity to let their creativity shine. >> captain kirk plans to go where no other 90-year-old has gone before. >> captain kirk is set to boldly go where no other 90-year-old has ever gone before. >> captain kirk is set to boldly go where no other 90-year-old has gone before. >> captain kirk's about to go where no 90-year-old has gone before. >> where no man has gone before. >> boldly went where no man has gone before. >> where no man has gone before. >> jimmy: you did it again, people. you did it again. you nailed that one. i don't know why, but i'm kind of excited that william shatner is going to space. it's like if samuel l. jackson found a bunch of snakes on a plane. meanwhile, captain jerk made his presence known this weekend. as you likely know, a group of republican senators in arizona authorized a company called the

"cyber ninjas," to conduct a review of state election results that donald trump insists had to be wrong. he could not believe he lost arizona to joe biden, and so he pushed the state to hire, at cost of $6 million, a very trump-friendly company to audit the vote. and turns out, not only did the ninjas find "no substantial differences," between their tally and the official count, they actually found 99 more votes for biden and 261 fewer for donald trump. i would have loved to have been there when they broke that news to him. so basically, trump lost the election he thought was rigged against him, and then lost the audit of the election he thought was rigged for him. so now, in a desperate attempt to do as much damage to democracy as he possibly can, trump is pushing for audits even in states he won. the governor of texas, greg abbott, who never misses an opportunity to kiss that big orange ass of trump's, announced

they too will be conducting an audit to verify election results in a state trump won by 600,000 votes. wouldn't it be hilarious if the audit showed trump lost texas too? oops! you lost, donald. it's over. take it like a man getting spanked with a rolled-up magazine. you lost. but he can't accept it. he had a rally in perry, georgia on saturday night, where he bragged he never made a concession speech. he explained that those who oppose him have darkness in their hearts. >> the people we're dealing with are evil and angry and destroying our country. they're destroying our country. and they want to go after me because i have -- they think a big mouth. i don't have a big mouth. you know what i have? i have a mouth that tells the truth. i have a mouth that wants to save our country. >> jimmy: that was his famous, "i have a mouth" speech. he has a mouth.

will someone please put a mcnugget in it? mouth rushmore also gave himself a pat on the back for one of his top ten imaginary accomplishments. that is, winning fox news' famous "war on christmas." >> they are starting to say very strongly merry christmas. remember when i first ran? i said you're going to say merry christmas. they were all saying merry christmas again. >> jimmy: who is saying merry christmas in september? so trump sat for an interview on his pet network oan where he was asked to grade his handling of the pandemic. make no mistake, donald trump has never made a mistake. >> was there any missteps, do you regret anything with the handling, and looking back in retrospect, what was right for not hyping it up and scaring people? >> i actually thank you for the question. i guess in life you also have

missteps no matter what you do. even if you get 100 on your exam, you could have done a little better, right? >> jimmy: no, not right. 100 is the highest. if you'd ever taken a test yourself, you'd know that. at the white house today, president biden got a booster shot on live tv. i want you to watch this very closely. >> we'll do our part. we've also given the vehicle that does this. we have plenty of opportunities to make sure you get everyone vaccinated. >> jimmy: did any of you have any idea how hairy he was? zoom in there. it's like an armfro. he has the shoulders of an ape! dr. zaius is our president now! i feel like that should have been disclosed. adults over age 65 are being encouraged to get a booster which seems obvious to most, but some americans are still coming

up with their own homegrown ways to fight the virus. the latest is people putting hydrogen peroxide into their inhalers. their asthma inhalers. in fact, so many dummies are doing this, the asthma and allergy foundation of america had to issue an official warning. this is a real warning. "do not put hydrogen peroxide into your nebulizer and breathe it in. this is dangerous. it is not a way to prevent nor treat covid-19. do not put hydrogen peroxide in your nebulizer!" sounds like something c3po would yell at r2d2. for whatever reason, there are these remedies out there people are willing to try. a conservative cartoonist named ben garrison, who has been very anti-vaccine throughout this whole thing. he now has covid, of course. they all get it, eventually. and to treat the symptoms, he says he and his wife have been drinking a lot of beet juice. apparently, if you say "beet juice, beet juice, beet juice," three times, the cure for covid appears.

garrison and his wife are also taking the horse worm stuff, ivermectin, which explains the drawing he made of a horse kicking dr. fauci. i know it's dr. fauci, because he wrote "dr. fauci" next to his head. that's the mark of a great cartoonist, one who has to write out their subjects' name. anyway, i wish mr. garrison and his wife the best as they try to beet juice the virus out of them. i never thought i'd say this, but i miss the old days when we were eating tide pods for no health benefits whatsoever. just for the sport of it! we have an important update to a story we covered last week. last week, i shared a clip of a woman from austin, texas, who showed up at a school board meeting angry about some questionable reading material she found in the middle school library. >> i do not want my children to learn about anal sex in middle school. i've never had anal sex, i don't want to have anal sex, i don't want my kids having anal sex.

>> jimmy: so her name -- her kids moved immediately right out of the house. her name is kara bell. we did some digging because she's wonderful. it turns out kara has a very colorful history. >> it was on april 7 that she took a trip where she did not wear a mask. employees told police she shoved an employee and forced her way into a dressing room. when police arrived, she was still in the dressing room on the form with the corporate office. >> jimmy: so the police show up for this karen named kara, and stick with this bodycam footage. i want you to see all of it, because rarely do videos end in a more satisfying way than this. >> i am a woman of god. this is my right as much as it is yours. this is my land as much as it is yours. i did not sign up for this. i am a christian woman of god. and you are not going to put your disgusting rules on me that

are false and not true. i will not have it. do you understand that? i will not have it. i'm sick of being bullied. i'm sick of being lied to. and it's not going to happen any more. do you understand? the cdc just released -- >> turn around. >> oh, my gosh. oh, my gosh. >> jimmy: there are happy endings. there are a lot of angry people out there. the big uproar this weekend, i don't know if you heard about this. they're making a super mario movie, an animated movie, and people online strongly disagreed with chris pratt being cast to play super mario. fans took to social media to furiously demand that an italian actor portray this offensive italian stereotype instead. some of the many, many tweets, not one italian casted to voice the new mario movie.

"chris pratt playing mario is italiaphobia, and i'm tired of acting like it isn't." "i don't think i'm ever going to recover from chris pratt playing mario." ladies, pay attention, if your boyfriend was more upset about this than the texas abortion law, say goodbye. it's as if they announced chris pratt was the new black panther. it's crazy. if you're old enough to tweet, you're too old to have an opinion on this. one of the most outspoken critics of chris pratt, is a guy named ben porello. we tracked ben down, and here he is, joining us now. ben, i understand you're not at all happy with the casting choices for the mario movie? >> no, i'm not happy. i am outraged. >> jimmy: why specifically are you outraged? >> i have been looking forward to a mario movie for decades. now, we finally get it, and mario is going to be played by chris pratt? i mean, what?

>> jimmy: okay. but what's so bad about casting chris pratt in an animated movie? >> what's so bad about it? >> jimmy: yeah. >> what? >> jimmy: yes. what's so bad about it? >> it's corporate white-washing! mario is italian. he should be played by an actor who is italian and who will tell me that he is proud of me. >> jimmy: excuse me? >> it's pretty simple, jimmy, mario is italian. therefore, he should be portrayed by an italian actor who can accurately represent the italian culture, and who will tell me that he approves of the choices i've made in my life. >> i get the italian part, i'm just not sure about what you said there at the end. >> look. this is not about chris pratt. chris pratt is fine. he's just not right for this role. the role of mario, super mario calls for a stallone, a danza! a confident italian man who can

rock a mustache and call me on my birthday to tell me he loves me, despite the fact that i blew the inheritance my nonna left me on funko pops. >> jimmy: your demands sound very specific. >> they do? >> jimmy: yes, they do. they very do. >> that's probably because i've been a huge mario fan since i got my first gameboy, which i loved, until my dad broke it over his knee and told me "i didn'ta raise a no geeka boy!" >> jimmy: and is your dad italian? >> oof, marone, is he ever. >> jimmy: but this isn't even a live action movie. this is a cartoon. we'll only be hearing the actors' voices. >> all the more reason mario needs a strong italian voice. when i go to that theater on opening night, i want to hear my favorite character say, "i lovea you, ben, and i forgivea you for dropping out of community college. and i forgivea you for ruining thanksgiving by screaming about how lola bunny was hotter in the firsta 'space jam.'

and i'm a-sorry i breaka you gameboy!" >> jimmy: ben. are you okay? >> papa! look! your little bambino is on the tv! aren't i good boy now, papa?! aren't i a-good? i maka you a spicy meatball, i promise. >> jimmy: okay, well, thanks for chatting with us. i'm sorry. sounds like he's got father issues. let's not let that get us down. from "curb your enthusiasm," j.b. smoove is here. we have music from masked wolf. and we'll be back with freddie highmore. stick around. today let's paint with new behr dynasty™... so that you can be proud of your walls. where's your furniture? oh we thought it distracted from the new behr dynasty paint color. let me take your coats.

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>> jimmy: tonight, from "curb >> jimmy: tonight, from "curb your enthusiasm" on hbo, j.b. smoove is here. then later, from sydney, australia, his new mixtape is called "astronomical," music from masked wolf. this week, we've got new shows with charlize theron, gabrielle union, ll cool j, mark duplass, we have music from angels & airwaves, tems, juan-ess and elvis costello too. join us all week. our first guest is the star of a show about a doctor who is good. so they call it "the good doctor." season five started tonight. watch it mondays at 10:00, here on abc. please welcome freddie highmore. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ >> jimmy: how are you doing? >> good.

lovely to see you. >> jimmy: last time i saw you was on like a video chat we had. >> yes. >> jimmy: and then before that, you were here like right before it all went down. >> i think i told in hindsight a story that doesn't age well about masks and coronavirus and how funny it all was. but yes, that was the last time i was -- the last time i was in l.a. >> jimmy: you've been shooting in vancouver. you're shooting the next season now? >> yes. we're about four or five episodes in. >> jimmy: have you been flying or traveling much? >> not at all. i mean, briefly back home to the uk. >> jimmy: was it a good or bad experience flying here? >> the protocols and stuff i feel like were all relatively used to. but i've always -- i'm always a little bit nervous of flying. >> jimmy: even before this? >> i had a run-in with customs when i was younger. it's always stuck with me. >> jimmy: how much younger? >> i was 10 or 11.

but it's definitely every time i go through that airport thing i get those flashbacks. >> jimmy: you had a run-in with customs when you were 10 or 11 years old? >> in cambodia. i just finished this film there and i was coming back with my dad and all seemingly was going well. there were a lot of men with guns, which is scary for everyone, especially if you're 10 years old in cambodia. >> jimmy: some countries you go into the airport and guys are carrying machine guns around and it's startling. >> yes. any way. so i go through and for whatever reason i'm pulled aside and they start doing the pat down. and they get to my pocket and keep patting. this white powder starts billowing out. and i knew i had done something wrong, because i was smuggling something i should. have been. so i turned to my dad and i said, i'm so sorry. i know you told me not to do it, i did it any way. i apologize. he steps in, it was me, i gave it to him. i always wanted to spend my life

in a cambodian jail. please, take me. so i'm escorted off. so they get the gloves on, the dog comes over and they put the glove into my pocket and they pull out a bar of soap and a shampoo bottle and a bottle of talcum powder that i had stolen from the hotel bathroom. my dad had been like, you don't need it. we can buy you talcum at home in the uk if you love it so much. but it was such a rare thing to find in the bathroom. >> jimmy: for sure. >> i just couldn't turn down the opportunity. but i have never taken anything ever since from a hotel bathroom. >> jimmy: not even the sewing kit, huh? >> that's always dangerous going through security. talcum powder and a sewing kit. >> jimmy: i never imagined you as a talc kind of guy. but now it's all coming together. you brought a video with you tonight. >> i did. >> jimmy: maybe you should set this up. >> this was my attempt to -- i

had been filming in vancouver, but i've been trying to experience wilderness and getting out in the mountains. >> jimmy: it is a beautiful part of the world. >> so i did this whale watching tour, that was amazing, because you get to see whales. being a brit, i fancy myself as a bit of david atomboro. >> jimmy: he narrates "the planet earth" and that sort of thing. >> exactly. so this was in hindsight me trying to be as eloquent as he is describing seeing some whales. >> here we go. take a look. >> it's a whale. and a tail. another one! oh [ bleep ] [ bleep ]! it's coming for the boat. [ bleep ]! >> jimmy: very eloquent.

>> that's my best david at atleboro. we don't get much practice in the uk. we get like a gray squirrel. >> jimmy: with a whale close to you, it's hard not to use profanity. >> and not to give any other information other than it's a whale and repeat it again and again. as if that's insightful for viewers watching my show. >> jimmy: i'm looking at your wedding ring right now that. is a wedding ring? >> it is a wedding ring. [ applause ] yes, i got married. it's funny, ever since i've been wearing this ring, people have been asking me if i'm married. >> jimmy: that's what happens, yeah. >> so i figured i should clarify it. i'm not going to jump up and down on the couch and express my excitement in that way. i know you do that in america? >> jimmy: when you're so happy, that's what you do. >> i'm as happy as a brit can be. i'm married to a very wonderful woman now. so yes. >> jimmy: she's a brit, as well? >> she is.

i still can't get over the terminology and the vocab. a married man just sounds very old and "my wife" sounds very possessive. >> jimmy: you're right, my wife. >> we don't really use that yet. we just point to the rings and like here, make your own conclusion. >> is this her? what do you do? >> you just wave the ring. >> jimmy: is she allowed to say my husband? >> i feel like that sounds a little better. but "my wife," i don't know. >> jimmy: you're going to have to loosen up a little. >> it's still the early days. thank you for the tips. >> jimmy: more with freddie highmore, after this. we'll be right back. r this. we'll be right back.

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>> >> i was concerned, but i think the changes seem reasonable and data driven. we should start by picking a cake. >> you prioritize the cake over the date. >> i've compiled a list of the most popular ones. what is your favorite cake? >> whatever you think our guests will like. there's no such thing as bad cake. >> jimmy: i disagree on that. >> you disagree? >> jimmy: freddie highmore is here. there's bad cake for sure. ever buy a cake at the supermarket? they're terrible. >> i would still eat it.

>> jimmy: my mother makes these beautiful cakes and puts a lot of work into them. it just so happened we were all away together and we were like oh, we forgot a cake. so my wife and i bought a cake in the supermarket and brought it into the car and we were like, we cannot give her this cake. so we pulled up to some family standing on the street corner and handed them a cake. >> that's very fun. >> jimmy: yes, it was very weird. >> i just eat it and that's it. >> jimmy: i'm sure you are well aware in the promos for "the good doctor" it made it sound like your character was getting married. >> it's probably the hardest time i ever had with press when the teaser suggests the opposite of what goes on to happen. because you're not really sure what to tease. the teaser is like, the wedding's happening tonight. you will see the wedding. whereas actually people have now

seen, there's a 30-second scene that's a dream sequence of a wedding, and then it cuts to wedding preparations. so it's a little bit -- >> jimmy: and then you have to do interviews and lie about this. >> it is genuinely the whole season, which will be lovely. but yes, it was an odd one to promote. >> jimmy: especially being a newlywed yourself. and now there's something i want to ask you about. this is something that we noticed quite some time ago. another scene from the show from last season. and please roll this and i'll translate afterwards if need be. >> mommy is sick. >> no, sweetie, it's not your fault. sometimes people just get -- >> mommy drunk my poop. >> your mommy drew your -- >> no, drunk. mommy drunk. >> drank? >> drank, yes, mommy drank my poop.

>> jimmy: mommy drank my poop? >> it's very common. we try and touch on hot topic issues on the show. this was our psa. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: is that the title of this particular episode? because it should have been if it wasn't. mommy drank my poop. >> if shawn murphy had been there, it would have been so much earlier. >> jimmy: when you get the script and you're going through it, do you go, umm, what's this? >> you sort of just have to trust the medical professionals. like sure, i guess so. okay. >> jimmy: in your professional television medical opinion -- >> it's never good to drink your own child's poop. >> jimmy: should you drink the

poop of other children? >> that's also bad. that was the conclusion of the episode. >> jimmy: you're still a newlywed, i understand. that's a good one. i feel like on "gray's anatomy" we've had a lot of these great, like my penis got caught in a blender. or whatever they've done. >> this is only season five. i don't know where it goes from here. >> jimmy: i don't know how you top that. please send my congratulations to everyone at the show. >> i will, especially with regard to that story line. >> jimmy: only in regard to that story line. specifically in regard to that story line. but congratulations on five seasons. "the good doctor." it's monday nights, 10:00, right here on abc. freddie highmore, everybody. we'll be back with j.b. smoove. we'll be back with j.b. smoove.

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next month on hbo, he rejoins larry david on the 11th season of "curb your enthusiasm." please say hello to j.b. smoove. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ >> jimmy: i'll take that for you. there you go. you look very sharp. there's no denying it. i like this look. >> this is -- you know what i call this? speak easy. this is speak easy style right here. >> jimmy: that is what it is. >> you can't talk to me unless you've got a password. you can't even get in the building if you don't know the password. what i should have done is this. >> jimmy: what? >> i should have came here today on one of those bicycles with the big front wheel.

>> jimmy: next time. >> tip the hat to the ladies. hello, ladies. >> jimmy: we really missed an opportunity there. >> we should get one of those bikes. >> jimmy: i don't know if i can ride one. there's a man walking in here. >> here i go again. >> hey, you left this back there. [ applause ] >> i keep doing this. i keep leaving this thing everywhere. >> jimmy: congratulations on it. >> thanks so much. you know what they should do, jimmy? see, the thing is, this thing is so particular. people should have options when they win an emmy. everybody don't want this. the people can't see it. you don't want to carry it around everywhere you go,

because this happens. everybody has it in their house sitting on a mantle and no one sees it except family or friends or people who are vaccinated or got shots. i don't know. but any way. >> jimmy: have you thought about maybe -- i think you could pull this off, affixing it to the front of your car. >> that would be cool. they should give you options when you are nominated. there's little things like the emmy belt, you know. or how about an emmy cane. how about an emmy gift certificate? or an emmy tattoo. after you win, you sit your ass back in your seat and the tattoo artist comes and puts on your arm or lower back. that would be beautiful. >> jimmy: that would be good. >> look at the emmy award

winner, baby. it's on his ass. >> jimmy: what did you win that for? what exactly? >> "maple worth murders," short contempt, on roku. hey, roku, what's going on? we did it, baby. >> jimmy: had roku ever won a -- i didn't know it was a network. >> i'm the first one. >> jimmy: wow. >> i'm going to change my middle name to roku, i don't know. >> jimmy: it's called "the maple worth murders." >> i play officer billy bills. very fun man. >> jimmy: look, you won an emmy for it. you want to put that right there? put that right there. >> and don't let me forget it. >> jimmy: i'll run it out to you if you do. i didn't know this about you, and i'm so surprised and interested to learn that you're an rv guy. >> hey, man, you'll learn a lot from me. >> jimmy: i could. >> i'm like the -- i might be

one of the -- maybe i'll start the black rv club or something line that. i don't know if there's a lot of black rv'ers out there. >> there's a lot to know about rv'ing. i bought one a couple of summers ago. you really have to catch up. there's terminology you have to follow. >> you have to know what you're doing. there's three different places you can go. camp grounds, we call that free balling. it's called free balling. >> jimmy: it is? >> there's no dumping site, there's no electricity. you run off a generator. we call it free balling. >> jimmy: i thought that was something else. >> rv parks, and then rv resorts, jimmy, with the pools and the clubhouse and the putting greens and stuff. you pull your rv in there, you got a little outdoor kitchen, all the goodies. you have to be careful where you go at. look, i've done all three. got to know what you're doing. you take your butt out there to those campsites.

it's like rvs and there's tents. the people in the tents are going to borrow stuff from you. >> jimmy: that's good to know. >> sugar, milk, socks, dog food. i mean, just random stuff. great people, but man, you got to know where you want to go. and you've got to know the rules to rv'ing. >> jimmy: what are some of the rules? >> some of the pitfalls. you know your water, right? you've been out there. you've got fresh water, you got gray water, and you've got black water. the black water is the toilet water. gray water is like shower water, washing dishes water, and fresh water. so you have to navigate your black water. you have to know the tricks of the trade, how to conserve your black water. you befriend other rv'ers. you go say, how are you doing? oh, nice rig.

you complement them and they'll want to show you. we call this in the rv world, showing your ass. they'll invite you into your rv. wow, this is beautiful. you find your way to the bathroom and you use their bathroom. you use their black water up. you don't use your own black water. you do this several times to conserve your black water. >> you're right, you're right. i tell my kids, i will say to them, no pooping in the rv. within 45 minutes it will happen. they'll just go in there and like, yeah, i pooped. i'm like, what, get it out! >> they don't have black water etiquette. it's all in the book, the manual. you know what else is in the manual? don't eat everybody's potato salad because it will make you use more black water. >> jimmy: these are good tips. >> and what is the height of your rv? >> jimmy: i don't know.

i know the length. >> you are at risk of tearing the whole roof off your damn rv. because you don't know off hand your height. the number one thing you should know is your height. >> jimmy: is that right? >> yeah, you pull up to a country ass gas station and you'll tear the roof off that. you forget what you're driving. the kids say, i want mcdonald's. okay, and the whole roof comes off. you go home, open your manual and know your damn height before you go on the road again. >> jimmy: i am going to learn that. i'm going to put a sticker on the windshield that has the height. >> just know it in your head. >> jimmy: can i ask you a serious question, but why -- i know "curb your enthusiasm" is coming back with new episodes next month. why don't we know what the date is? because it's going to be on a sunday, right? it's always sunday. there's five sundays in october.

one of them is halloween. it's probably not going to be halloween, right? >> so you're doing the math right now. >> jimmy: i'm doing the math. >> i'm trying to figure out what day it is going to be. you know how many sundays there are in a month. you already know what's coming in october. >> jimmy: you know when it's coming on? you do or do not know? >> my lips are sealed, man. that's the fun thing about "curb." you know, larry has this unique ability to take what's happening in the world and then redigesting it or regurgitating it for our laughter. >> jimmy: you'll be talking about covid then, i assume? >> i don't know. i don't know. >> jimmy: i know that you do know. >> i don't know. i do know, but i don't know.

>> jimmy: all right. can you confirm that you are doing standup comedy? >> i am coming back, jimmy. i've not been on stage in a year and a half. and i am so looking forward to getting back on that stage. you know what my tour is called? no questions, just answers. >> jimmy: will you be driving around in the rv for the tour? >> maybe, if it's in proximity to where i need to be at, within five hours maybe. >> jimmy: why is it called no questions, just answers? >> because i already know what the hell your ass need to know. people don't know until you tell them what they need to know. i wlr -- already know what the hell you need to know. that's my kind of thing. that's my thing right now. >> jimmy: thank you for helping. thank you for bringing me this beautiful emmy. it's a lovely gift. and also, go can't tell you when "curb your enthusiasm" comes

back to hbo. it will be next month. we've narrowed it dow jones. >> i want to thank everybody for supporting j.b. smoove. and this right here is something -- i've been 30 years in the business. this was amazing to win, man. >> jimmy: it's high time you got an emmy, j.b. you can see him live at caroline's in new york october 14th through the 17th. the great j.b. smoove, everybody. we'll be back with masked wolf. . we're completely out of flour. i'm trying to order more, but this site's so bad. i usually just type in flour 100 times until it works. what a great idea! this is great. i've only ever bought bird seed from this website, but they're recommending cat food. i think we need a cat. they know us so well. who wants a kitty cat?

who wants... you want a kitty cat. (vo) singing, or speaking. reason, or fun. daring, or thoughtful. sensitive, or strong. progress isn't either or progress is everything.

[ "the addams family" theme playing ] ♪ they're nice but irritating ♪ ♪ their excitement can get grating ♪ ♪ they're dressed for pastry baking ♪ ♪ the progressive family ♪ ♪ they're helpful but annoying ♪ ♪ they always leave us snoring ♪ ♪ accidents are boring with the progressive family ♪ so... when do you all go home? never! we're here for you 24/7. how terrifying. protection so good it's scary. "the addams family 2" playing october 1st. ♪ ♪ protection so good it's scary. we make the goods that make life better...

and make the everyday... more sustainable. sonoma goods for life. kohl's. [knocking on door] ♪ ♪ so many bottles of champagne ♪ ♪ ♪ i'm in a room with the famous faces ♪ “ready and action!” ♪ oh, i feel like scorsese ♪ ♪ ♪ yeah, this sure is like a movie ♪ ♪ (yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah) ♪ ♪ whoa, we're 'bout to make a movie, ♪ ♪ woo ♪ ♪ ♪ roll out the red carpet for me ♪ “ladies and gentlemen, that's a wrap!"

♪ roll out the red carpet for me ♪ if laundry stinks, it could be bacteria. detergent alone doesn't kill all odor causing bacteria. adding lysol laundry sanitizer kills 99.9 %. l, what is takes to protect.

>> the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is presented by mercedes- benz. the best or nothing. >> jimmy: this is called "astronomical." here with the song "pandemonium," from sydney, australia, masked wolf! ♪ ♪

♪ throw my pain in the ♪ ♪ wishing well i wish you well late night wanders ♪ ♪ on a mission still i ain't happy with my wisdom still ♪ ♪ this band is tryna increase the skill hustle every time ♪ ♪ i'm called in like clockwork sweat and the tears ♪ ♪ who gonna drop first blood in the sand i am the man ♪ ♪ i will not lurk wait nobody gon' faze me nobody gon' push me ♪ ♪ they treatin' the veteran like he a rookie ♪ ♪ i'm turnin' the heat up so let's get to cookin' they takin' a risk ♪ ♪ like you playin' a bookie mission control i'm calling you out ♪ ♪ kicking down doors i'm up in your house mission control ♪ ♪ while you ain't around morse code when you feelin' in doubt ♪ ♪ pandemonium i need it out of orbit ain't a weakness ♪ ♪ the pressure is real they wantin' to kill but i ain't gon' ♪ ♪ let 'em achieve it pandemonium i need it out of orbit ♪ ♪ ain't a weakness the pressure is real they wantin' to kill ♪ ♪ but i ain't gon' let 'em achieve it wait i'm comin' ♪ ♪ i'm walkin' around with a desert eagle birdseye with a view ♪

♪ from the top like an aerial born from the ground ♪ ♪ i'm assessing your burial larry king toxic inhaling the chemicals ♪ ♪ i'm the soldier of xanadu everything on point ♪ ♪ i'm calling that decimal sounds of the bullets i'm lovin' the decibels ♪ ♪ wait who gon' tell me i am not emergin' like an ostrich ♪ ♪ your head down up in the dirt yo who's the bounty ♪ ♪ i want all the perks yo where's my bonus i want all the perks ♪ ♪ i been strugglin' hustlin' money to make through all the conditions ♪ ♪ towards any state my enemies dog is whatever it takes ♪ ♪ reward the risk no matter the stake nobody gon' faze me ♪ ♪ nobody gon' push me they treatin' the veteran like he a rookie ♪ ♪ i'm turnin' the heat up so let's get to cookin' they takin' a risk ♪ ♪ like you playin' a bookie mission control ♪ ♪ i'm calling you out kicking down doors i'm up in your house ♪ ♪ mission control while you ain't around morse code when ♪ ♪ you feelin' in doubt pandemonium i need it out of orbit ♪ ♪ ain't a weakness the pressure is real they wantin' to kill ♪ ♪ but i ain't gon' let 'em achieve it pandemonium i need

it ♪ ♪ out of orbit ain't a weakness the pressures al ♪ they wantin' to kill but i ain't gon' let 'em achieve it ♪ >> the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is presented by mercedes- benz. the best or nothing. the best or nothing.

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>> jimmy: i want to thank freddie highmore, j.b. smoove, and masked wolf. apologies to matt damon. we ran out of time for him. tomorrow night, gabrielle union and mark duplass, with music from angels & airwaves. "nightline" is next. sorry about the whole fly being open thing earlier. i apologize. thanks for watching. good night, everybody. apologiz. thanks for watching. good night, everybody.

this is "nightline." >> tonight, r. kelly, guilty. survivors finding vindication. >> for 30 years, we were overlooked. for 30 years people said we were lying. for 30 years, people said this didn't occur. ♪ i believe i can fly ♪ >> the i believe i can fly singer facing the possibility of a lifetime in prison. why his lawyers hope to appeal. plus, discovering the edge of a planet in peril. >> so this is greenland's ice sheet. just incredible. >> but the ancient ice is melting fast. what it means for the rest of the earth. >> what happens in the arctic does not stay in the arctic. it affects and cascades the whole world.