appreciate your time. right now on jimmy kimmel, peter dinklage. >> lou: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- peter dinklage, fortune feimster, and music from oliver tree. and now, jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: hi, everyone. very nice. welcome, welcome. appreciate that. i'm jimmy, the host of the show. thank you for watching. thank for coming. i think you'd agree, guillermo. it's so good to be here with my tv show fam. you know? >> guillermo: yeah, i totally agree. >> jimmy: you know, this morning i'm driving to work.

like this. i'm in my neighborhood, we have very tight streets. like if a garbage truck is coming through, you just take the day off. you go home and forget about it. [ laughter ] but it's pretty clear today. so as i go down the hill, i see a guy in his car. he's behind the wheel, he's having a conversation with a woman who's standing on the street in front of her house. i slow down, i squeeze between them with my car, they're still talking. i stop. he's here in the car. she's there on the street. i stop my car, and i roll down the windows and say, "what are you guys talking about?" [ laughter ] and they look at me, confused. and then, i start laughing and drive away. [ laughter ] this is how i amuse myself now that we can't go out to dinner with friends anymore. [ laughter ] president biden had a bad day. you know that vaccine mandate he rolled out last year? the one that required companies with more than 100 employees to get their workers vaccinated or toast tested regularly? well, that was struck down by the supreme court today. the conservative majority ruled that biden's mandate went too far.

and our individual right to get covid from the worst person at work has been preserved. [ laughter ] [ applause ] by the way, you know who instituted america's first vaccine mandate? george washington. it's true. he required all soldiers in the continental army be inoculated against smallpox, and this was before there was an fda to make sure drugs like that were safe. it's a good thing john roberts wasn't there to weigh in on george washington right now would be dead right now. [ laughter ] covid cases are up, and president biden's approval rating is down. according to the new quinnipiac poll, only a third of americans approve of the job biden is doing, which is a new low. at this point, he might want to consider actually changing his name to brandon. [ laughter ] 33% is low. to put that in perspective, that is "entourage movie rotten tomatoes score" level low. and this is his "turtle." [ laughter ] grampotus gave an update on where we stand pandemic-wise today, laying out his plan to

increase the availability of tests. >> we're on track. we're on track to roll out a website next week where you can order free tests shipped to your home. >> jimmy: wow. shipped to your home. do you think he knows about amazon? [ laughter ] he's a little too excited about ship to your home. and while he is working hard to get more tests, biden is also trying to curtail the spread of virus misinformation. >> i make a special appeal to social media companies and media outlets. please deal with the misinformation and disinformation that's on your shows. it has to stop. >> jimmy: well, if that doesn't stop it, i don't know what will. [ laughter ] he asked very nicely. the good news is the january 6th storm trumpers are finally getting rounded up. the justice department today charged 11 people with "seditious conspiracy" for their roles in planning the attack on the capitol. sedition is a very serious charge. similar to treason. the definition of "seditious

conspiracy" is essentially two or more people conspiring to overthrow the government by force. you know how your mother used to say if your friend jumped off of a bridge, would you jump too? these are people who answered "yes." [ laughter ] one of the men charged today is a gentleman named stewart rhodes. he is the leader of a group called the oath keepers. he's like a cross between captain hook and cap'n crunch. laugh laugh [ laughter ] long shorts silver. rhodes lost his eye when he accidentally dropped a loaded handgun and shot his eye. so rhodes is no rhodes scholar. the charges were a bit of a surprise because apparently it's difficult to prove sedition. although he did say that anyone opposing donald trump should expect, quote, "a bloody, bloody civil war." so how hard could it be, really? [ laughter ] the oath keepers and their one-eyed snake aren't the only ones who support trump across the country.

congresswoman marjorie taylor greene and senator ted cruz, aka clan mom and the blobfish -- [ laughter ] continue to push bananas conspiracy theories about who is responsible for january 6th. their latest thing is that one of the rioters, alleged rioters, is a guy named ray epps. they say he was really an fbi agent in disguise, as an idiot -- [ laughter ] who tricked trump supporters into ransacking the capitol. that's quite an episode of "punk'd." [ laughter ] we are living in historically stupid times. lies turn into rumors, rumors turn into investigations, congressmen and women are spreading them on purpose. did you know major, the white house dog, isn't a german shepherd? he's a russian kgb agent. [ laughter ] he works for putin and he's pulling all the strings from under grandpa joe's feet. [ laughter ] it's totally true, by the way. according to a new study, the average american -- this is where we're getting these theories -- spends one-third of

our waking hours on a mobile device. am i the only one who thinks that sounds low? [ laughter ] i'm pretty sure last night i was playing wordle in my sleep. we or our phones all the time. we also downloaded 230 billion apps. i have at least half of them on my phone right now. [ laughter ] but this is an app-based device i won't be loading. it's called "mor." it's a patch men can put in their nether regions to make them last longer. [ laughter ] during lovemaking. you sync the patch to your phone and it somehow sends a signal to your testicles saying "hang on, guys!" [ laughter ] "slow it down!" it looks great. honey, hang on, let me adhere my patch before we make love! [ laughter ] we went on the website to investigate. this is the ceo of the company that sells this. [ laughter ] boy, if that isn't a photo that says, i'm not just the owner, i'm also a client, i don't know what is.

[ laughter and applause ] put that back up there, let's stare at him for a little while. [ laughter ] i think you could -- yeah, you really get hypnotized. you know, i get that this is a real problem for some people. guillermo, this is a problem you have, right? >> guillermo: no. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: no. but i'll tell you something. you know what works even better and is a lot cheaper and doesn't require an app at all? if you want to last longer in bed? ted cruz bed sheets. [ laughter ] in portland, a collegiate baseball league is doing some damage control right now thanks to their new mascot, the pickle. >> the portland pickles are investigating what they are calling a disturbing image posted to their twitter page that appears to show mascot dylan's, well, pickle. >> yeah. we're not going to show you the photo on tv. >> no, can't show it to you. >> jimmy: well, we can. [ cheers and applause ] and we are going to show it to

you. this is the disturbing image. [ moans ] new phone who dis? whoever posted it says, no, no, pickle's giving a thumbs up. put that thumb up, that doesn't look like a thumb to me. [ laughter ] that looks like the last thing miss piggy saw on her wedding night. [ laughter ] i hope they get that straightened out. this country is disgusting. but we are doing our part to clean it up. it's thursday night and that means it's time to bleep and blur the big tv moments of the week, whether they need it or not. it's "this week in unnecessary censorship." [ cheers and applause ] >> the portland pickles are investigating what they are calling a disturbing image posted to their twitter page that appears to show mascot dylan's, well -- [ bleep ]. >> yeah. >> i got to know, what does that [ bleep ] taste like? >> there's going to be some

[ bleep ] torn up in indianapolis tonight, baby! >> everybody [ bleep ], [ bleep ]. >> it just really upsets me that our state has become represented by these people who don't [ bleep ] me. >> dr. anthony fauci says omicron will [ bleep ] just about everybody in the >> opinion be dictated by law. >> get [ bleep ]. >> god blessed me with a big [ bleep ]. >> it as lovely day, check out this [ bleep ] from camp hill. >> it was time to [ bleep ]. >> oh no! why are they doing this? >> right now rolling! ♪ i just needed someone here who would gently [ bleep ] my rear ♪ ♪ to be fair to [ bleep ] my derriere ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: we're going to take a

break. when we come back, we have a special visit with the mypillow man, so stick around, we'll be right back.

[ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: welcome back. peter dinklage, fortune feimster, and music from oliver tree is on the way. but first, mr. mypillow is back! mike lindell is having a heck of a 2022 so far. last week, his phone was subpoenaed by the house committee looking into the events of january 6th so he doesn't have his jitterbug. [ laughter ] they want to see who he called and when. they want to see his phone records as they relate to the insurrection. i'm trying to imagine what

mike lindell's phone records -- i feel we're going to find out he dialed 123456789 every 11 minutes. [ laughter ] or he spent six and a half hours on the phone with a pizza hut in honolulu. mike has been making the rounds of the fringe right wing media, trying to sell what might be his most outlandish claim yet. >> it's so amazing, all the things that we have. we already have all the pieces of the puzzle. talk about evidence, enough evidence to put everybody in prison for life. 300 and some million people. >> jimmy: what? 300 and some -- there are only 330 million people in the country. [ laughter ] how would that work? would that include the prison guards? [ laughter ] and how does this help sell pillows? >>. >> you put everyone in prison. he keeps saying he has the "evidence." he's like james cameron with the "avatar" sequel. "just 12 more years, i promise, it's coming!" [ laughter ] lindell claims he spent $25 million of his own money to prove his claims of election fraud, and he says he will "borrow more" if necessary to

-- i don't know who he's going to borrow that money from. whoever they are should not have $25 million. i want to know more about this. we went straight to the source. joining us now from -- i'm not sure where, exactly, mike lindell. let's find out where he is. oh my gosh, mike! hey, mike! >> is that you? cigarette toast, gustavo? >> jimmy: it's not gustavo, it's jimmy kimmel. where are you right now? >> i'm in skacopie correctional facility in minnesota. >> jimmy: why are you in prison? >> as i said i have enough evidence woman, and child in america for the rest of their natural lives, including me.

>> jimmy: you incarcerated yourself? >> you're gosh darn tooting i did. i'm an american too! and since we're all being incarcerated together forever anyway, i bribed the warden to let me into supermax to get a good spot! >> jimmy: but why would you want to go to prison? >> everyone's out to get me, jerry. democrats, republicans, the mexicans, even i'm out to get me! [ whistle ] hang on a sec. i gotta store to run. what up bobo? how many you need? two? fresh from the outside. you tell sicko and shorty biz they want their sleep sacks, they better bring me my [ bleep ]. they know what it is. an oat muffin and a photo of salma hayak in a tight sweater so i don't go soft for the boys. >> jimmy: mike? >> sorry jamie, i've sold more pillows in here in three days than i ever did on the outside. >> jimmy: well, that's good. i didn't know you smoke. >> would you believe it? i've been substance free for 13 years, but a week in here and i'm addicted to cigarettes again. >> jimmy: oh my -- i don't know -- hey, what's that on your face? is that a teardrop tattoo?

don't tell me you killed someone, mike. >> of course not, i'm pro-life all the way! i got this teardrop tattoo because i'm sad about our stolen election, but i can't cry real tears cause my ducts got damaged when i tried to deep fry a half-frozen turkey during my thanksgiving day telethon. sucker blew up in my face like a roadside bomb and cauterized my optic nerve. >> jimmy: oh, no. >> i tell you, i looked just like daffy duck. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: boy, you shouldn't eat those things, they're not good for you at all. >> i forget how dry they are. i got to wet my whistle -- >> jimmy: oh, that is toilet wine? i think that's illegal. >> it's not wine, it's urine. >> jimmy: maybe you should just go home since you didn't do anything. what -- what's going on? >> it's a prison riot, jim!

it's go time! >> jimmy: what are you doing with those? >> i'm armoring up. my pillows are so lumpy and hard, they can't be cut with a razor. >> jimmy: i didn't know that, what a nice feature. why don't you just stay in the cell? >> are you crazy? i missed out on the last riot because i was in the white house, january 6th. i'm not going to miss the opportunity to stab a cop with a screwdriver again. shorty biz! vamanos! stabby la policia! oye como va! mi ritmo! >> jimmy: what did he say? >> guillermo: he wants the police, he said. >> jimmy: no, the end part in spanish. [ laughter ]id "police."- >> jimmy: whatever he said, i hope he's okay. we are praying for mike lindell. thanks, mike. we'll be back with peter dinklage! we'll be right back. >> lou: portions of "jimmy kimmel live" are brought to you by verizon. go to verizon.com/5g to watch the verizon 5g ultra show now. you are an electric vehicle.

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>> jimmy: hi, there, welcome back to the show. tonight, a funny actor and stand-up comedian who's currently on a tour of the united states. fortune feimster is with us. [ cheers and applause ] then later, his album "cowboy tears" comes out february 18th. and his tour starts the next day here in l.a. oliver tree from the mercedes-benz stage. [ cheers and applause ] next week, we have new shows. our guests on those shows are jason bateman, whose birthday it

is today, i believe. rob lowe, rachel brosnahan, eric andre, and denzel washington, with music from twenty one pilots, damon albarn, and ghost. so please join us for all that. [ cheers and applause ] not a real ghost, don't worry. >> guillermo: okay, i won't worry. >> jimmy: our first guest is a four-time emmy-winning actor who drinks wine from a jeweled goblet like nobody's business. his new movie is called "cyrano." >> good night. >> wait! >> i could no more stop loving you -- >> i could no more stop loving you -- >> than i can stop the sun rising. >> than i can stop the sun rising. >> really? >> my true love has never stopped growing from my soul -- >> from the day it was born there. >> from the day it was born. >> there. >> there. >> jimmy: "cyrano" opens in theaters next month. please welcome peter dinklage. [ cheers and applause ]

hey, peter, how are you? >> hey. >> jimmy: you'll be happy to know you're getting a standing ovation right now. he's not here, he's at home. [ laughter ] >> i'm so sorry. that i'm home. it's sort of the strange time we're all living. we all are now existing from here up. >> jimmy: yeah, no, i think you did the right thing. i think it's safest. you live in new york. is the family -- are the kids back in school? how is that going? >> yeah, they are -- well, we're all having ptsd from the time where they all weren't in school. >> jimmy: yeah. >> all sort of learning how to be teachers at home. but no, they're -- the schools at least here in new york, hopefully otherwhere, other places in america and elsewhere, have really made great strides adapting to the new world we're living in. >> jimmy: yeah, i would assume you were getting a little stir crazy with the kids there. what did you do when you're home

alone, you have the house to yourself only? >> i zoom. i zoom into talk shows. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you do. >> fake talk shows me and my friends set up. [ laughter ] i mean, it really brought in, you know -- it made us question our own existence, didn't it? all that free time we had at home for the last couple of years. but no, everything's good. >> jimmy: i knew i existed, i just didn't know why. [ laughter ] i have no idea. >> right. >> jimmy: like, what is going on here? the days are just rolling into each other. and i will say, one thing i have missed about doing these covid interviews over the web -- >> it feels very retro now. it's starting to come back. i brought the retro zoom interview back. >> jimmy: it's coming back. i do like seeing inside people's houses. i'm looking at the back, i see a little rectangle on your wall. >> what's behind that door? >> jimmy: oh, who knows? there could be a dragon behind that door. [ laughter ] >> kind of creepy. >> jimmy: it would be cool if

you opened that door and a million of those goblets from the show tumble out. [ laughter ] you have any of those? did you hang on to any of those things? >> my daughter want to run in in a hockey mask and freak everybody else. i thought it would be too much. >> jimmy: this movie, cyrano," you first played cyrano on stage, i assume on broadway? >> oh, thank you, no. it was down -- way off broadway. >> jimmy: oh. [ laughter ] >> but yeah, you know, i'm not the first person to do the part of cyrano on stage or on film. i certainly won't be the last person. but it's a great role. for a reason. you know, for me it sort of always was, though, you know -- me personally, a handsome actor and a fake nose, and that's sort of -- i thought, what's he going off about? but what we did is we got rid of the nose and we added some beautiful songs from the band

the national. so we added sort of a fresh spin to the whole classic tale. >> jimmy: you're singing in this and you're rapping in it too. would you say it's rapping? it's set in the 1600s so they didn't have the word rap yet. sort of like poetry spoken aloud, like poetry slam. >> jimmy: right. >> i mean, that basically predates rap, and that's what rap, you know, is born from, with a beat. but we -- yeah. for lack of a better word, i definitely rap. >> jimmy: i didn't know you -- i did know you sang and did that kind of stuff. >> neither did i. [ laughter ] i -- you know, for a long time -- i still don't know if i can act. you just got to, you know -- hey. you know. what are we doing here? we're just taking risks. >> jimmy: if it's a karaoke -- if there's a karaoke night going on, will you grab the microphone? what is your song if you do? >> oh.

"love my way" by the psychedelic furs. >> jimmy: oh, really? >> or "pretty in pink." >> jimmy: wow. >> the somber, sort of melancholy, lovelorn songs are my jam. i cannot sing like axl rose or freddie mercury, so you've got to go the crooner ballads. >> jimmy: the movie is -- i'm assuming you shot the movie in italy because it's absolutely beautiful. where in italy did you shoot the movie? >> we shot in sicily. primarily in a town called noto sicily, which is beautiful. i mean, it was the pandemic, so it was pretty much shut down. >> jimmy: yeah. >> you know, you go to a place like italy, when all the restaurants are closed, it's a little disappointing. >> jimmy: all the restaurants were closed? oh, no. >> yeah, but there was one place, a couple of places that were open. one was a cannoli place called mangio fico. as much as we were all trying to stay in shape, this cannoli

place, it was the greatest cannoli i've ever had. >> jimmy: really? >> i highly recommend. if you go to noto sicily, go to mangio fico. what the italians say is the greatest cannoli on the face of the earth. >> jimmy: do you know what a cannoli is? >> guillermo: yeah, the street bread like this -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: no, cannoli, it's a circular tube, it's a hard, crispy pastry. and inside is a sweet cream. and they put chocolate chips or pistachios or whatever. there's a whole store that just sells cannolis? >> the greatest, the best in italy. >> jimmy: oh my god. >> that was right behind where we were shooting every day, basically. >> jimmy: i was cheated out of cannolis on christmas eve. because we had to cancel our dinner because of the stupid covid. normally that's the one time of the year that we'll order the cannolis from ferrara's in brooklyn. new york has great cannolis, you're telling me these are even better? >> yeah, no, but it's -- sicily,

it's the birthplace. no better. >> jimmy: that does make sense. they invented the cannoli, they probably have it down pretty well. >> yeah. >> jimmy: you shot this movie -- a battle scene is on a mountain. >> it's not a mountain. it's an active volcano. >> jimmy: okay. [ laughter ] >> it was truly an active volcano. most people run from an active volcano when the lava is flow, we went towards it and shot a movie on the side of it. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: when you say an active volcano, you're not kidding around. this is one that erupts a lot. >> she, her name is aetna, as the people of sisterily call her, they have a good understanding with her. they have a deal made with her. because as you drive towards her, the top of her -- we shot at about 12,000 feet, very close to her edge. and there's an old convent on the road up there. and all the nuns, about 200 years ago, were inside, praying,

when the lava was flowing down. you see the old lava stone, it goes right around the convent. and because the nuns were in there praying, aetna, she spared their lives. so they have -- since then, they've had a great understanding and sort of a deal made with her. but about, you know -- we shot up there. they say -- you don't have to worry about the lava because it flows very slowly, you've got to worry about the earthquakes. so we sort of were concerned about that. >> jimmy: yeah, sure, that seems like a -- >> i've got to show you this picture, jimmy. >> jimmy: oh, yeah. >> a week after we wrapped, i said she erupted about 50 times this past year. but about a week after we wrapped, this is the town, catania, at the foot of it where we lived while we were shooting there. this happened. >> jimmy: whoa! oh my god, oh my god. >> yeah. she's erupting. >> jimmy: yeah. wow. fried cannoli for everyone.

[ laughter ] >> it's amazing. that's what i love -- i love what i do, because what other gig do you get to shoot on the side of an active volcano? >> jimmy: it is great to see you. the movie is called "cyrano." it opens in theaters everywhere next month. peter dinklage, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] thank you, peter. be safe. we'll be back with fortune feimster! [upbeat acoustic music throughout] [upbeat acoustic music throughout]

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>> jimmy: hello and welcome back to our show. this weekend is the anniversary of the first expedition to reach the south pole. but if you ask a penguin, "why am i buffering?" what's going on? >> you're buffering because you aren't 5g! >> jimmy: hey, elizabeth banks! [ cheers and applause ] where did she go? >> i'm right here. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: how did you get there so fast? >> two words for you, jimmy. 5g. >> jimmy: 5g. that's -- a number and a letter, not really two words, but wow. >> spoken like someone who didn't host the 5g ultra show. >> jimmy: that's true, i didn't host -- >> well, i did. [ laughter ] that's how i know verizon 5g broadband offers up to 10 times faster download speeds. you know, jimmy, that could help you search for a barber in your neighborhood so you don't have so keep cutting your own hair. >> jimmy: i don't cut my own hair -- >> find out more by watching me host the 5g ultra show streaming now at verizon.com/5g. >> jimmy: you really are very fast. >> you have no idea.

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>> jimmy: oh, hi, there. music from oliver tree is on the way. our next guest is an actress, writer, and comedian from north carolina. you can see her live on her nationwide stand-up tour. please welcome fortune feimster. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: very good to see you, how's it going? >> plopping back in the chair. >> jimmy: yeah. >> i haven't been out of sweat pants in a minute. >> jimmy: is that right? >> yeah. >> jimmy: a transition for you? >> i had to dress up for you. >> jimmy: thank you, i appreciate it, it's nice to see you. >> jimmy: nice to see you too. >> i met you at the "office christmas party" movie premiere. >> jimmy: the movie "office

christmas party." >> yeah, you were there supporting our mutual bestie, jennifer aniston. >> jimmy: and will speck, who directed that movie. >> that's right. i like to call jen my bestie. she doesn't know that part yet. [ laughter ] no, she's amazing. yeah, you and your lovely wife, momly, came to the after party. we were talking. and my wife ran up and started tugging me away from you guys. she was like, they're serving sliders! [ laughter ] i was like -- gosh. it was really dark, to be fair. and she knows i love mini ham bur hamburgers. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i'm very flattered you chose us over the sliders. [ laughter ] >> later i was like, i was talking to jimmy kimmel! she said, it must have been something important, i was thinking, because you've never turned down a slider. [ laughter ] that's how much i enjoyed talking to you. >> jimmy: thank you, i appreciate that. is your real name fortune, your given name? >> it's my middle name.

>> jimmy: middle name. >> old family name. my great grandmother's maiden name was fortune. there were four sisters. they called them the "miss fortunes." [ laughter [ laughter ] my grandmother was adamant my mom name me that. my mom was like, she'd have to be miss america to live up to a name like fortune, which i'm very offended that my mom did not think i could be miss america. [ laughter ] so i grew up going by my first name, then once i started comedy i'm like, i have this great middle name and my grandmother had passed. for me it was a way to sort of honor my grandmother. >> jimmy: and it's a good name. >> it's a good name, yeah. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: i couldn't do that. my grandmother's name was edith, and it would be a weird choice for me. >> edith would be odd. edith kimmel. >> jimmy: so you're on tour right now. >> i am, yeah. >> jimmy: at which i assume has its ups and downs in this time? >> yeah. i mean, well -- first off, i'm just happy to be doing any show.

because for a year and a half, the entire touring industry was shut down. >> jimmy: yeah. >> my tour was supposed to start march 14th of 2020. which actually, you know -- obviously did not happen. but we picked it up a year and a half later. >> jimmy: i think that's the day it started. >> yeah, exactly. [ laughter ] i had my bags packed. they were like, nope, you're not going anywhere. but luckily it's picked back up. >> jimmy: good. >> i'm out on the road doing really beautiful theaters. it's been awesome. >> jimmy: people are relaxed and laughing. >> yeah, the theaters -- the theaters are doing an amazing job keeping everybody safe. you know. people need to laugh right now. there's a need for levity. a need for release. there's just been so much stress. and so to get to make people laugh is great. >> jimmy: i heard your mother loves hooters. >> she does. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: which is weird. she still loves hooters? it's still a thing? >> she loves hooters. i talk about my netflix special,

for a while she denied her love of hooters because she was dating a very conservative, religious man. >> jimmy: oh. >> yeah. so she, you know -- >> jimmy: does she lie a lot? [ laughter ] >> i mean -- we're not sure. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: because she's good at it if she does. of a fan base. >> jimmy: your mom has? >> my mom has. she was saying the other day to some friends of mine, she's like, i was on a podcast, and now i have fans. i was like, mom. that's my podcast! [ laughter ] like, what? i was on a random podcast? no one's putting you on a podcast. so she came to my shows in atlanta. and it was so funny. like people lose their mind always they see her. they love her so much. she comes out just looking for people to recognize her. [ laughter ] she's just like, i'm here! it's me, ginger! >> jimmy: do you have her stand up? or do you bring her up? >> i point her out a lot during

my show. she can't obviously come to all the shows. but when it's close to north carolina, she does. >> jimmy: would you want her to come to all the shows? >> she would want to come, she would love the attention and the snacks. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: have you thought about letting her open for you? i mean, maybe you put her to work. >> i think she might overshine me, i don' know if i want to put myself in that position. >> jimmy: you have to be careful. >> i do. >> jimmy: does your wife get along with your mother? >> they get along great. we don't get home that much, she lives in north carolina, we see her, i don't know, three to five times a year. so it's always nice catching up with the two of them. >> jimmy: yeah. does your comedy tour have a name? >> yeah, it's -- well, it started off as "too sweet, too salty" as a nod to my stand-up special, "sweet and salty." this is, all right, we didn't get to go on the first tour, here's take two. but i think we're transitioning it into "hey, y'all."

[ laughter ] >> jimmy: "hey, y'all"? >> why not? it's simple. >> jimmy: it is. you're putting up shirts that say the "hey, y'all tour"? >> working on shirtsand posters. right now it's "too sweet, too salty." i wanted to get away from the special because this is a whole new hour, all new material. >> jimmy: right, people are going to think they will see the same stuff. >> people hearing about hooters. >> jimmy: people don't mind hearing the same stuff, do they? >> no, showing up in homemade t-shirts they've made with references to all these jokes from my special. it's trippy. so crazy. but i love it. >> jimmy: this is something odd that i would like to ask you about. >> sure. >> jimmy: i don't think this is a joke. you tell me if it was. you tweeted this two weeks ago. i just started thinking about when i was a kid, every now and then a stranger would knock on our door and ask the use the bathroom. did that happen to other people or did i just grow up in a weird town? [ laughter ] >> did that happen to other people? >> jimmy: never happened to me. >> no. no, okay. yeah, i don't know -- we were

watching somethig, somebody rang the doorbell. nowadays if anyone rings your doorbell, you're like -- it's horrifying. >> jimmy: right. >> you're like, who knocks on doors? it's insane. so it made me think about growing up. i'm from a very small town. occasionally -- we were on a main street. occasionally, someone would just knock on the door. >> jimmy: was it the same person every time? >> not the same person. they would sometimes ask to use the bathroom. every now and then they'd ask to use the phone. that was pre-cell phones. and i was like -- i didn't think much of it. i was like, oh, you know, that happened to me. anyone who grew up in a city, when they tweeted that they were horrified. like, that's psycho. you're from a weird town. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: it's weird, you could see it -- i look at it one of two ways. i wouldn't -- i know i'd be too shy to knock on the door to use the bathroom. >> i would be too. >> jimmy: i'd pee on the side of the road. [ laughter ] >> i'd pee on the side of the road, but --

>> jimmy: you're either getting people who are too polite. >> right. >> jimmy: or too, you know, decent to pee on the road, or people who are stopping at your house because number two is on the way. [ laughter ] you know? >> yes, yeah, yeah. [ applause ] >> jimmy: so that's -- thank you. >> i want that to be a shirt. "number two actiis the on the w" >> jimmy: i like the call thing, now i've used the bathroom, now i'm going to make some calls, "honey, guess what i just did?" >> kidd number two, now i need to call somebody. it was a weird time. we had a guy going around town selling encyclopedias. >> jimmy: oh, yeah. >> he was a hit. he was very handsome. >> jimmy: he was? really? >> yeah all the moms were losing their minds for this guy. >> jimmy: interesting. >> they're like, come on in! do you want a soda? [ laughter ] can i get you lunch? he was eating every meal at different houses.

he was timing it. [ laughter ] he'd get breakfast, lunch, mid-day snack, dinner. this guy was eating well. >> jimmy: did your mom buy encyclopedias? >> oh, gosh, yes. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: oh, boy. >> she's just like -- [ laughter ] encyclopedias became obsolete like two years later. >> jimmy: yeah. >> like my entire town, everyone is like, what do we do with all these encyclopedias? [ laughter ] that guy was very handsome. >> jimmy: i'm sure he is doing all right. >> i'm sure. he's got to be selling something. >> jimmy: where are you headed next? where are you working after this? >> san diego. san antonio. houston. new orleans. kansas city. i'm everywhere. >> jimmy: there you go. if you want to find the dates, fortunefeimster.com is the place to do it. fortune feimster, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] we'll be back with oliver tree. >> lou: the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is presented by mercedes-benz. the best or nothing.

>> lou: the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is presented by mercedes-benz. the best or nothing.

>> jimmy: i want to thank peter dinklage, fortune feimster, james adomian. apologies to matt damon. we did run out of time for him. "nightline" is next, but first, his album "cowboy tears" comes out february 18th. here with the songs "life goes on" and "cowboys don't cry," oliver tree! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ ♪ babe you're too controlling ima feed you to the wolves ♪ ♪ when you get nasty back at me but baby don't distract me ♪ ♪ i'm a goner i lost her like why the hell you wanna ♪lay me that way you're bad babe you double faced entendre ♪ ♪ life goes on and on and on and on and on and on ♪

♪ and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on ♪ ♪ and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on ♪ ♪ and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on ♪ ♪ yeah yeah yeah ♪ ♪ work all day and then i wake up work all day and then i wake up ♪ ♪ work all day and then i wake up work all day ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ i'm not good at goodbyes i miss the sunshine in your eyes ♪ ♪ who said cowboys

don't cry ♪ ♪ come on baby let's take one last ride ♪ ♪ we're riding around on this carousel if you catch my drift ♪ ♪ we're riding around on this wagon wheel she took me for a spin ♪ ♪ we're riding around on this carousel getting dizzy til we're sick ♪ ♪ love is like a circle there's no easy way to end ♪ ♪ just an outlaw who only had one friend i wonder if i'll ever see her face again ♪ ♪ dark clouds hanging over they follow where i've been my cowboy tears are still blowing in the wind ♪ ♪ we're riding around on this carousel if you catch my drift ♪ ♪ we're riding around

on this wagon wheel she took me for a spin ♪ ♪ we're riding around on this carousel getting dizzy til we're sick ♪ ♪ love is like a circle there's no easy way to end ♪ ♪ i'm not good at goodbyes i miss the sunshine in your eyes ♪ ♪ who said cowboys don't cry ♪ ♪ come on baby let's take one last ride ♪ [ cheers and applause ]

♪ this is "nightline." >> tonight, oath keepers charged. the anti-government militia's leader arrested on some of the most serious charges yet in connection to the january 6th attack on the capitol. sedition. >> it's the closest thing that you are going to get under the law to treason, to insurrection. >> what the fbi says encrypted messages reveal. and we examine the inner workings of the oath keepers through the eyes of a former insider. >> people were becoming more and more radicalized. i had to just turn and walk away. plus broadway's heroes. the understudies patiently waiting their turn. >> we're showing up and doing shows we haven't done i