tv Jimmy Kimmel Live ABC January 27, 2022 11:35pm-12:37am PST
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>> lou: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- johnny knoxville, meredith hagner and music from the walters. and now, jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: hello, hi. thank you. welcome. cleto. guillermo. hi, there. i'm jimmy, i am the host of the show. thanks for watching, again. thank you for joining us here at our beautiful and luxurious headquarters in hollywood where marijuana is not only legal at some establishments here, it's required to get in.
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[ cheers and applause ] you know, last week i mentioned there is scientific evidence now that cannabis could help ward off the covid. but it also according to researchers at the national primate research center in oregon may decrease testicular function. [ whoos ] which, yeah. it decreases just about every function. that's kind of the point. they did a study on monkeys, they gave them doses of thc every day and collected their sperm samples, and man, were those some happy monkeys. [ laughter ] i mean, being a lab animal doesn't get better than that. except for the part where their testicles got smaller and their sperm went to sleep. they made an animated video demonstrating the effect that cannabis has on sperm. this is sperm. you can see they're going a lot slower than normal. kind of like meandering around. one of them has a hacky sack.
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[ laughter ] now they approach the egg to fertilize it. then they kind of wander off. [ laughter ] to where? oh, to taco bell. [ laughter and applause ] that's what happens. they say this is probably nothing new and that the effect likely wasn't noticed before, because "do you think my balls look smaller?" sounds like something someone who's high would say. [ laughter ] with that said, and i'm no doctor. but snoop dogg has four children. willie nelson fathered eight children. bob marley had 11 kids. so you should be okay is what i'm saying. [ applause ] you only have the one kid. >> guillermo: yeah, but i only drink tequila. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: okay, yeah. i've seen evidence to the contrary. [ laughter ] we're learning more about this new version of omicron that's making the rounds at an even faster rate than the original omicron. the new variant is said to be so contagious, none of you should be here.
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[ laughter ] that's how contagious it is. you probably shouldn't even be watching the show at home. the good news, is that omicron ba.2 does not appear to be more severe when it comes to symptoms. all these variants reminds me of the boy bands in the late '90s and early 2000s. you know, you had the big ones. like the backstreet boys and nsync, then that mutated into o-town and 98 degrees. [ laughter ] the jo-bros kept popping up and big time rush. they kept splitting off in different directions eventually one direction. [ applause ] into pieces, adding on another, popping up all over the world until eventually, we get to one that is so contagious it destroys all life on earth. meanwhile, sarah palin, remember her? she has covid for the second time now. the unmasked singer is in new york right now, appearing in court for her defamation suit against "the new york times." twelve years ago she couldn't name a newspaper and now she's suing one. the trial was supposed to start this week, but had to be pushed
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when sarah palin, who is famously unvaccinated, tested positive again on monday. in new york you're supposed to isolate for five days after a positive test. but darn it, that's not how alaska's top hockey mom does it. [ laughter ] she plays by her own rules. the other night, she caught some flack for eating indoors at a restaurant despite the fact that you are supposed to show proof of vaccination to get in. she doesn't have that. and now, after testing positive, she went back to that same restaurant! with covid and a guy who's coughing. there's toy foid mary. what's she supposed to do? sit in her hotel room and order from any of the 20,000 restaurants in new york city? this is a list i was surprised sarah palin didn't make. speculation about who will occupy the white house in january of 2025 has already begun. and the numbers aren't so good for joe biden or donald trump. according to a new poll from politico, more americans would vote for a generic republican
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candidate than for president joe biden. 46% say they would back a generic republican, 37% would vote for joe. the only problem is there are no generic republican candidates anymore. [ laughter ] they've been chased off by strippers with machine guns who wear glasses to pretend they can read. [ laughter ] republicans are looking for new blood. unfortunately, rudy giuliani keeps drinking it. [ laughter ] the good news for biden is that in a matchup against donald trump, the poll says he's up by a point, 46% to 45%. the poll also showed that biden would beat mike pence, ron desantis, or ted cruz. i think that's all of them, right? and isn't it too early for these polls? the election is three years away. by that time, trump will either be in prison, or he'll be emperor. [ laughter ] one or the other. if trump doesn't run in 2024, right now there are two favorites to win the gop nomination according to the poll. ron desantis and his son, don
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jr. [ laughter ] i love that. don jr. couldn't run a dunkin' donuts. [ laughter ] on the first day, he'd snort all the powdered sugar and get his head stuck in the macchiato machine. he's going to be the president? but that doesn't mean he isn't taking it seriously. say what you want about djtj, this is a young man who believes in himself. >> america is ready for a new kind of leader. >> joe biden is what stands between us and the nuclear capable sinai. >> he's got big ideas. >> why doesn't elon musk create a social media platform? >> he's got the rona. >> apparently i got the rona. >> not to mention a mind for business. >> check out my contact on rumble. >> he's not afraid to take on the big guys. >> i guess i did something to piss off the instagram gods. >> or to reach out to his supporters with kindness and
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love. >> jacob, your incredible fiancee, rebecca, told me you passed your p.e. exam. >> you have a choice in '24. >> you can be a hero or you can be a zero. i'm donald trump jr., and i don't have a job. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: it's good. tell you what. honestly, it would almost be worth it for don jr. to become president just to see trump not show up at his own son's inauguration. right? [ laughter ] in other very important news. you know how everyone on fox was going crazy about the m&ms characters getting new shoes? well, now they're mad about minnie mouse. to mark the 30th anniversary of disneyland in paris, stella mccartney, the designer, gave minnie a new look. she designed a pantsuit for the month. and no one was more upset than candace owens who sees this as yet another attempt by the left to tear this country apart. >> i mean, look ate it, this is why people didn't take this
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seriously. they're taking all these things that nobody was offended by, feel like they have to get rid of them and destroy them, because they're bored, absolutely bored, trying to destroy fabrics of our society, pretending there's issues is so everybody looks over here. look at minnie mouse, don't look at inflation. the world was going forward because you've got her in a pantsuit. never mind you can't get anything at the grocery store, you can't buy bacon unless you've got $30 in your pocket. real problem, which is minnie - mouse. >> that's right. >> jimmy: except you're the only one talking about this. [ laughter ] no one is talking about minnie mouse on the other channels. if minnie mouse getting a new outfit upsets you, i would recommend turning 4 years old. [ laughter ] and by the way, be honest. if you saw a mouse wearing a pantsuit that would be pretty awesome, right? [ laughter ] there is a lot of totally made-up outrage going around. do you guys know what furries are? well, if you continue, don't, you've got a fun night of google ahead of you. [ laughter ] this is from a school board meeting in midland, michigan where a concerned mom had some
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serious concerns about what's going on in the school bathroom. >> let's talk about fury -- furries. it was addressed by a child a couple of months ago, that they are put in an environment where there are kids that are -- that identify as a furry. a cat or a dog, whatever. and so yesterday i heard that at least one of our schools in our town has, in one of the unisex bathrooms, a litter box for the kids that identify as cats. and i am really disturbed by that. >> jimmy: what? you'd rather they went on the floor? [ laughter ] what are they supposed to do? this woman -- she seemed to be under the impression that dei, which stands for "diversity, equi equity, and inclusion," was responsible for this abomination. >> i know there's probably a lot of dei that is very important, and i'm not here to criticize that at all. but this furry thing has just got me -- i'm staying calm but i'm not happy about it, and it's
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happened on your watch, and i don't understand it. >> thank you. thank you, lisa. >> jimmy: yeah lisa, great job. now go take a crap in the litterbox you deserve it. [ laughter and applause ] this, of course, turned out to be completely untrue. the school district said, "there is no truth whatsoever to this false statement, there have never been litter boxes with mps schools. it is such a source of disappointment that i felt the necessity to communicate this message to you." but that didn't stop the co-chair of the michigan republican party, a danola canned ham named meshawn maddock to post -- "kids who identify as "furries" get a litter box in the school bathroom. parent heroes will take back our schools!" good. i went to school with a kid named ethan. his parent hero used to sit in her car outside the playground and scream at us when we threw a dodgeball at him. [ laughter ] i wonder who made this story up about teenage furries pooping in the litter box in the bathroom. whatever kid it was must be laughing his ass off right now. [ laughter ]
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speaking of furry cuteness, it's a special night for us, it's guillermo's birthday tonight. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ guillermo is the embodiment of the american dream. his family sacrificed everything to get to america, now he gets paid very handsomely to get drunk at work. congratulations. how does it feel? >> guillermo: feels great. >> jimmy: 51 is a magical age. you see the whole world differently. it's like there are going to be entire aisles at the pharmacy you never knew existed. [ laughter ] you'll have an opinion on which crackers go best with which soup. your bowel movements will become more important than your family, really. [ laughter ] >> guillermo: wow. >> jimmy: so you're going to -- you know what you're going to also -- you will at this age start to develop an appetite for details about world war ii that
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you're not going to be able to control. it's a weird thing. >> guillermo: wow. >> jimmy: you're drunk, aren't you? >> guillermo: yeah. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: i just realized that. oh, i'm having a conversation with a havi mall. [ laughter ] we wanted to come up with fun way to celebrate guillermo today. something that would give those who don't know him personally an idea of what he's like. and one of the things you should know about guillermo is that he loves to text. he's like a 15-year-old girl, all day long. a ot of us over the years have been on the receiving end of those texts and vice versa. so we went around the office and asked his friends and coworkers to dig up their favorite correspondence with guillermo. we didn't make these up, we didn't alter these. these are actual text messages guillermo sent to us. >> guillermo actually married me and my wife. he was the officiant. he said, "take her shopping,
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women loves shoes. nice dinner, rent a helicopter for and hour. take her around downtown or santa monica, buy here some perfume flowers." great advice. >> on a random wednesday at 6:59 a.m., "good morning, walk your dog, please." >> last january, guillermo sent me this photo and said, "you were a baby here." then in september he sent me the same photo and said, "you look so young here." [ laughter ] >> so back in august guillermo had covid. i texted, how are you feeling, buddy? i'm okay, thank you for checking, how is the wife doing? i said, ha ha, i'm not married. he said, your girlfriend told me she is pregnant, right? [ laughter ] i hope not. >> i also texted him to see how he was feeling. and he texted back. "thank you very much for checking, i am doing better than
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god." now there's a chance he meant to say "thank god." but i think that arrogant son of a bitch is better than god. >> i texted him and i said, you suck, stop being a [ bleep ]. he texted back, sorry, but my knee hurt too much from that bottom of heart. i was coaching my son team today. i love pot and i'm fascinated with vaginas but my knee hurt. [ laughter and applause ] >> christmas break, we were supposed to go hiking and it looked like rain, everybody was on the fence. guillermo got back to us with his decision. "love you guys, i'm going to make some pancakes instead, happy holidays." i don't think he was ever going to go hiking. >> couple of years ago in the bubble championship, guillermo sent me a text. he said, are you watching the lakers? i'm in the crowd. i said, awesome, i'll look for you. are you wearing a bright yellow shirt? yes, my friend. and i found him.
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>> "you look so high." >> i got this text from guillermo out of the blue. "i love cardi b, check out her instagram today, do you agree with her or not?" i checked out her instagram, and it was a post about how she likes to have sex with the tv on. guillermo, that's none of your [ muted ] business. >> guillermo and i don't text that much. he did leave this message on my notebook, "write a check to guillermo for $500 for being sexy." >> my wife got a promotion. guillermo texted me, congratulations to sarah, tell her i am very happy for her, you guys are together. and i wrote back, aww, i will tell her, thanks, g. then he wrote back, jewish guy. to which i responded, i sure am. [ laughter ] >> so i was on the cover of a magazine, and guillermo sent me this picture of his mom holding
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it. and he wrote, my mom says you're so handsome. and often dreams with you. [ laughter ] and i wrote, oh-oh, you could be my stepson. o happy birthday, my little baby boy. mommy and i love you very much. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: happy birthday, guillermo. hakuna tequila! a round of applause for the birthday boy. [ cheers and applause ] >> guillermo: yeah, thank you! >> jimmy: no, wait, we've got a show. meredith hagner from "search party" is here. we've got music from the walters and we'll be right back with johnny knoxville. so stick around!
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>> jimmy: hi there, welcome back. tonight, from "search party" on hbo max, meredith hagner is with us. [ cheers and applause ] then later -- their song is called "i love you so" the walters from the mercedes-benz stage. [ cheers and applause ] next week, we have quite a lineup with will arnett, andy cohen, josh gad, sebastian stan, lily james, and slash -- with music from the weather station and eric bellinger featuring seven. [ cheers and applause ] please join us for that. you know, there are so many -- a lot of performers claim to put blood, sweat and tears into their work. but our first guest puts his eyeballs and urethra in it too. [ laughter ] he returns to the franchise that made him a star, "jackass forever" opens in theaters a week from tomorrow. please welcome johnny knoxville. [ cheers and applause ] ♪
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>> jimmy: i hope that was a covid shot. [ laughter ] we're going to have to get somebody to drive you home, my friend. how are you doing? >> i'm doing good, thanks. >> jimmy: what's with the crown? congratulations. >> oh, you don't have to bring that up. you know, my name's johnny knoxville. i come from the south. i like to talk smack and run my mouth. all the girls say i'm something to see. i'm the new king of the wwe! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: yeah you are -- i know, you didn't get hurt enough making this movie. now you have to -- i mean, i'm happy to see you come out without medical assistance. now you're -- even the promotional tour, you have to endanger yourself. >> those guys, they don't have anyone big enough to throw me over the top rope.
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there's no endangering myself against those guys. >> jimmy: you want to know what an egomaniac i am? i thought you had my initials on your chest. [ laughter ] >> now i have to go make good for both of us. i'm representing both of us. >> jimmy: all "jks" everywhere. john krasinski. i'm sure there's other ones too. i'm glad you're getting into this. you've been taunting wrestlers and wrestling fans on your central account for 2 1/2 weeks? >> yeah, that lowdown and dirty sammy zane, that pretty boy austin thierry, i'm taunting them all. >> jimmy: you're going to be part of? >> the royal rumble. i'll be winning the royal rumble this saturday night. [ cheers and applause ] st. louis, june 29th -- or january 29th, sorry, the tequila's hitting. >> jimmy: as long as you're there on wednesday. correct me if i'm wrong, it's kind of like a battle royale, there's a bunch of guys -- how
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many guys in the ring? >> 30 guys but people come in every two or three minutes. often you'll be one on one, sometimes it's four on one. i hope it's ten on one. i'll be slinging their superstars into the front row like paper airplanes. i've asked the wwe to clear out the first four, three or four rows so i don't injure any of the audience. >> jimmy: that's very considerate. very, very considerate. >> yeah. >> jimmy: you -- will you be wearing -- what are you going to wear? >> i have an outfit planned. this will be my shirt. it's a sneak peek. >> jimmy: you'll be the only wrestler in a shirt. >> yeah. [ laughter ] i'll be the only wrestler in a shirt and an ill-fitting outfit. >> jimmy: and you're doing this because the movie is coming out. >> well, i -- yeah. that was promotion but i completely drank the soup and i can't wait to get in the ring. i spend a lot of my day arguing with fans on the wwe website. instagram. >> jimmy: i did foyt, it seems
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like you're getting a little carried away. when was this photo taken? >> that was me kicking that lowdown and dirty sammy zane right in the kisser. looks like i'm going to have to do it again because he won't shut that mouth. >> jimmy: how many more pounds does sammy weigh than you? >> i don't know, i put on a little covid 20 myself. >> jimmy: uh-huh? well, do you hae experience? i know you watch wrestler. >> i deal with bulls mostly in my day job. >> jimmy: yeah, right. >> they got nothing that's measured up to a bull. >> jimmy: i will say, and we're going to see a clip, a sample of this in a little bit. but none of these guys has ever, ever faced anything as dangerous as you have. >> no, or as dangerous as me. >> jimmy: yeah, or as dangerous as you. >> see it saturday night, jimmy. >> jimmy: i am watching this movie, "jackass forever." i'm laughing uncontrollably. >> thank you. >> jimmy: at the -- you guys -- i don't know. i feel like now -- it was always funny, but somehow it's even
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funnier. you now have no reason to do this. [ laughter ] there is literally -- like you could have passed the torch like iron man did to spider-man, you know. you could have found like a -- you did, you brought in some new people. >> yeah. >> jimmy: i want to talk about these new people you brought in. >> we got some real peaches, let me tell you. this guy named poopies, a more gullible rachel wilson, her mom is a judge, her dad is a d.a., her sister is an attorney. her mom put away o.j. she has a joke. the same person who sent o.j. away sent me to my room, but we both got out. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i have to say, she handles it, the abuse, better than all of you guys. >> no, she's tougher than all of us. >> i don't want to ruin anything, but -- i am going to ruin something. she has to put her tongue on a taser.
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>> right. >> jimmy: and then also like an inse insect. >> we had a scorpion sting her lips. >> jimmy: yeah, sting her in the lips. i'm wondering, did we consider -- like would this be considered progress? [ laughter ] now that we have a woman in the "jackass" crew, that is something we should be -- >> i'm excited about it yeah. >> jimmy: this is a step in the right direction for equality? >> yes, i believe so. she showed us all up. >> jimmy: yeah, and the way she did show you all up -- there's a guy named aaron, danger aaron, who is -- tell me if i'm wrong. it seemed to me in watching the movie -- i didn't go back and count. it seemed like he got assaulted in the testicles like a dozen times. >> no, jimmy, like -- we filmed so many cup test things with aaron that didn't make the movie.
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oftentimes you would schedule the cup tests on the same day. he got the softball to the -- >> jimmy: nothing doft about that softball. >> and the pogo stick on the same day. and he left in an ambulance. [ laughter ] and no one went to check on him. like, we're out of here! >> jimmy: if i was him i wouldn't have allowed you in the hospital either. yeah, it was absolutely crazy. even during covid, shooting this movie, was it like, okay, here's what we're going to do, we're going to nail your penis to a canoe. but put your mask on, we don't want anyone -- [ laughter ] >> it's exactly what happened. wear your mask until you get to the bullring. take off your mask. get knocked out by the bull. get taken away in an ambulance but put your mask on before you get to the ambulance. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: when we come back, we're going to see the reason johnny knoxville himself left set in an ambulance when we come back with a clip from "jack ass forever." be right back.
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♪ ♪ >> jimmy: that's johnny knoxville in "jackass forever." it comes out a week from tomorrow. so what -- you went to the hospital. i saw you leave in an ambulance. how long were you in there? >> i got out -- i got a weekend stay in the hospital. >> jimmy: how is it set up? do you have a plan for if you are killed during one of these stunts? will it still be in the movie? >> if i'm killed, i don't know. but -- luckily i made it, put it that way, yeah, yeah. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you don't have in your will -- >> i barely made it. >> jimmy: if anything is to happen to me, i want to make sure my fans see me die? >> yeah, no. maybe not the death. >> jimmy: if you ever fell down a flight of stairs or get hit by a car, i worry people wouldn't
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call 911. [ laughter ] >> right, they're like, is he joking? >> jimmy: oh, that's knoxville! >> right. >> jimmy: he'll get up, don't worry about it! >> yeah. >> jimmy: i watched the credits at the end. there's a lot of people involved. there's a lot of accessories to ye jimmy: e we so ma ppln iut] that seems insufficient. >> yeah. you know, half-assed stuntmen aren't great long-term planners. >> jimmy: i see, yeah. one of the best things about the tv show and the movies is watching how genuinely delighted you are by all these terrible things happening. not just to your friends but to you also. >> right. god help me, i love it. >> jimmy: i want to quiz you, test your memory. we'll see if that bull left anything in that head, all right? here it is. this is called "what's this maniac laughing at?" [ cheers and applause ] you have to tell me what you're laughing at. let's begin. here we go.
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you're holding on to yourself. that should be a clue. but here are the two options. steve-o warmed by bees. wie man hit in the nuts. >> wee man hit in the nuts. >> jimmy: is it wee man hit in the nuts? it is indeed, yeah. good so far. >> he fell for the soup! >> jimmy: you know this already, all right. let's take a look. [ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: i love that hand. that hand's in the new one. where is that hand? >> it's in my office, yeah. i'm not letting go of that thing. >> jimmy: all right, we have one more. >> i know! p>> jimmy: you know already.
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choices are, run over by bull. dildo bazooka. >> that would be the bull. >> jimmy: let's see. >> well, it's a buffalo. >> jimmy: oh, yeah. >> what did it feel like? >> it felt like [ bleep ]. [ applause ] >> jimmy: that is a buffalo, you're right. it's important to know that. what's next? are you done? are you done sacrificing your body for your art? >> well, you know -- you know, i'll have the royal rumble saturday night. there will be no sacrifices except for on the other side, jimmy. >> jimmy: try not to kill anybody, all right? >> yeah. it's going to be -- it's a pay-per-view event, so i hope i don't do long-term damage to anybody. >> jimmy: i really hope. you know what our prayers will be with those wrestlers and with you. >> please. >> jimmy: the new king of the wwe, johnny knoxville, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] "jackass forever" opens in theaters a week from tomorrow. we'll be back with meredith hagner. ♪
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[ cheers and applause ] ♪ ? welcome back. music from the walters is on the way. for the last five years our next guest has been the star of the show "search party." all parties have to come to an end. the fifth and final season of "search party" is on hbo max now. please say hello to meredith hagner. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: you know, i figured out it's guillermo's reverse quincera. 51 flipped over, right? >> guillermo: that's right, jimmy. >> happy birthday. >> guillermo: thank you very much. >> jimmy: did you meet johnny knoxville? >> i was a little geeked out,
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huge "jackass" fan. >> jimmy: we were talking about, rachel wolfson is in the movie, a coed situation. that is something you'd be comfortable being a part of? >> if by comfortable you mean, so excited that i pass out? oh, yeah. i would have. >> jimmy: everybody passes out. [ laughter ] >> yeah, no. everybody almost dies. >> jimmy: your husband's wyatt russell. he's been here before. >> yeah. >> jimmy: his whole family has been here, really. his sister, brothers, parents -- >> a bunch of up and comers. >> jimmy: i would think in a group like that, it would be hard to impress anyone, really. >> yeah. >> jimmy: yet you guys, and i know this because i work at abc, not only are you fans of "the bachelor," you and i would adequate, you even went to the "after the final rose" ceremony. >> yeah, we did. >> jimmy: i assume that was your idea? >> it was -- well, you know what's interesting, when we started dating i was, guilty pleasure, i'm into this show. my husband's like, yeah, not for me. and then maybe smoked a joint.
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[ laughter ] and within five minutes he's like, crying. he's literally, like, "the way he talks to his mom!" [ laughter ] he's "bachelor nation." i surprised him with being an audience member at the final rose ceremony for ari and lauren's season. >> jimmy: he didn't know he was going? >> no. you know how there's always one guy in a red cardigan in a sea of women? [ laughter ] i was selfishly like, this is going to be really fun for me to watch him in the audience. so he's pacing around. he's really excited to be here, but i just want to make sure i'm not on camera. and i'm like -- okay, mr. hollywood! too cool to be on camera! his energy around it was really funny. >> jimmy: i don't blame him. >> yeah. like, be cool, no one cares. i always was secretly wanting -- anyway. they seat us with a family -- >> jimmy: whose family?
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>> lauren's family. remember he was with becca? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i don't remember. i don't have room for any of it in my brain. >> it's embarrassing that i do. he proposed for lauren. my husband's like, i'm not going to be on camera, do i have to sign anything to double-check i'm not going to be on camera? i'm an actor. and i literally -- he proposes -- the family is crying -- and i feel the camera slowly zooming in on my husband. >> jimmy: oh, boy. >> so i get the giggles really bad. [ laughter ] this is the biggest moment of their life. they're getting engaged. and i'm in the back -- he's like, pretend to cry. i'm giggling and crying. >> jimmy: you did pretend to cry? >> yeah. >> jimmy: they weren't real stares? >> they weren't. >> jimmy: you were acting? well, you an actor. you were a model beforehand? >> i was a model. i had a huge modeling career, actually. >> jimmy: yeah, this is -- i have to tell you something. i am super impressed by this. i don't know why i think this is
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pretty great. [ applause ] >> yeah. i think, actually, kate upton and gisele were both in the running. [ laughter ] and they actually went with me. >> jimmy: you beat them out. do they give you a bunch of post-its? >> they didn't give me money, they give me office supplies. >> jimmy: this has to be exciting to walk into a staples and there you are. >> not to me but to my dad. he got the life-sized poster. my house, his office -- it wasn't huge, but it had a huge poster of me. then we had a water damage incident with something broke in the washing machine. and it got completely water damaged. so i was like -- [ laughter ] and he kept it! hey, dad. [ applause ] >> jimmy: wow. that's very sad.
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hopefully the 3m people are watching and will send him a fresh new one. >> it's me, guys, i made it! >> jimmy: this is the last season of "search party." this is it, five seasons, it's over. the first season was really a search party, you were searching. >> yeah. >> jimmy: the show changed. did you know at the end of the first season, did you know you were going to come back and do more seasons? >> i hadn't really done much in terms of paid work. i was in -- i didn't know how anything really went. like, where do i stand? >> jimmy: it's interesting, you do something like that, you have an end of the series, you guys have like a wrap party. then you don't know if you're saying good-bye forever or if you're saying good-bye for a couple of months. >> i -- for anybody that watches, it's a very cool cast. >> jimmy: uh-huh, yeah, really good, yeah. >> i'm like -- maybe not -- i feel like i'm probably not as cool. so we did have our wrap party and i was like, you know what? i'm going to get edibles. [ laughter ]
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>> jimmy: you got edibles for everyone? >> i'm going to make a cheese board. a little dip. and i'm cool. i'm going to get some edibles. it was like, i think i've done edibles like three times in my adult life. i feel like exactly two years between edible experiences, i somehow forget that it's awful. [ laughter ] and think i can do it again. >> jimmy: so i've heard. >> so i set out the little gummies because i love to host. gummy bears all lined up. everyone's around my kitchen. we're all going to walk to the wrap party. 5:30, so uncool, the light, the sun's coming in. great, we're going to do edibles. they're like, you ate the whole thing? and it's only 5:00! i was like, oh, god! and so then we start, like oh, i'm fine, i don't feel anything. walking to the wrap party and it's a hellscape of new york street. it's the most disgusting street. all of a sudden i'm like, this street is gorgeous! [ laughter ] i was like, the architecture! look at the colors! the houses are like easter eggs!
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they're like, the houses are easter eggs? >> jimmy: are you sure that was a gum meow ate and you didn't pick a mushroom along the way? >> every time i have a gummy i'm like, everyone's doing this? we go to the party. i don't know anyone i've ever worked with. years i've worked with these people. then i start speaking in greeting cards. it's the way my brain -- i kept being," home is where the heart is." they're like, this is a great run. i'm like, "find your bliss, man." john reynolds is like, you have to go home. thy get me in a cab. i laid for 24 hours watching the "game of thrones" season with the wildlings. just for -- >> jimmy: the windi wildings, y >> it was awful. >> jimmy: you watched a whole season of "game of thrones"? >> when i was high i kept playing the same episode over and over. [ laughter and applause ]
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>> lou: the jimmy kimmel live concert series is presented by mercedes-benz. the best or nothing. >> jimmy: i want to thank johnny knoxville and meredith hagner. apologies to matt damon. we ran out of time for him. "nightline" is next, but first, here with the song "i love you so" the walters! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ ♪ i just need someone in my life to give it structure to handle all the selfish ♪ ♪ ways i'd spend my time without her ♪ ♪ you're everything i want but i can't deal with all your lovers ♪ ♪ you're saying i'm the one but it's your actions
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that speak louder ♪ ♪ giving me love when you are down and need another i've gotta get away and ♪ ♪ let you go, i've gotta get over ♪ ♪ but i love you so i love you so i love you so i love you so ♪ ♪ i'm gonna pack my things and leave you behind this feeling's old and ♪ ♪ i know that i've made up my mind i hope you feel what ♪ ♪ i felt when you shattered my soul cause you were cool and i'm a fool ♪
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♪ this is "nightline." >> tonight, michael of a natty's fall from grace. the man who joined forces with stormy daniels to battle donald trump. >> my attorney and i are committed to making sure that everyone finds out the truth. >> now on trial, accused of lining his own pockets with her money. >> i'm completely innocent. this case should have never been filed. >> questioning his former client on cross examination. sammy the bull. the notorious hitman who says he lived a double life. >> i think i'm two people sometimes. i live a family life, and i'm a gangster. >> the wise guy who gave up john gatty. >> you're a rat, eat the parmesan cheese! >> now
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