larry biel and all of us thanks for joining us. have a good weekend. we'll ♪ i am offering this resolution, that the committee direct the chairman to issue a subpoena for relevant documents and testimony, under oath, from donald john trump in -- >> what? hee-ya! boo, boo, boo! aagghh! gravy! >> lou: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- george clooney and julia roberts. celebrities read mean tweets. plus music from omar apollo -- with cleto and the cletones. and now, jimmy kimmel!

[ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: oh, thank you very much. thanks. hi, everybody. thanks. thank you. i'm gemmy, i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching and joining us. please settle in, because -- oh, what a day it was here today in america. the award-winning limited series "the white potus" is back. [ laughter ] if you haven't been keeping up up with the january 6th hearings, here's a quick recap to get you up to speed. >> previously on january 6th -- >> president trump followed the course recommended by an apparently inebriated rudy giuliani. >> the mayor was definitely intoxicated. >> what they were proposing i thought was nuts. >> the claims of fraud were bull [ bleep ]. >> there was ketchup dripping down the wall. >> then we went for lunch. we went for tuckers. >> president trump was yelling

and aware of the rioters' chants to "hang mike pence." >> it was a different tone than i'd heard him take with the vice president before. >> do you remember what she said her father called him? >> the "b" word. >> the president reached in front of the vehicle to grab the steering wheel. >> he's become detached from reality. >> tonight i say this to my republican colleagues who are defending the indefensible. there will come a day when donald trump is gone, but your dishonor will remain. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: yeah, well, there you go. so we haven't -- the last hearing was july 1st. it felt a lot like "game of thrones" coming back. but instead of dragons roasting people, liz cheney was doing it. [ laughter ] the hearing began today at 1 pm eastern like all the soap operas do. "days off our lives." the title of this one. [ laughter ] and man oh man, did the ketchup

hit the wall. much of the evidence in these hearings came from trump's inner circle. it's like if o.j. had been turned in by his gloves. [ laughter ] these are his people. the chairman of the committee started by pointing out that almost all the evidence came from republicans, not democrats, and that the people who stopped trump from trying to steal the election, like mike pence and all those who repeatedly told him the election wasn't rigged, are also republican. or, i should say they were republican. now they're in the witness protection party. [ laughter ] we learned today that trump knew the election wasn't stolen and even told mark meadows, his chief of staff, that he didn't want anyone to know he lost because it was embarrassing to him. >> so he had said something to the effect of, "i don't want this is embarrassing, figure it out, we need to figure it out, i don't want people to know that we lost." >> jimmy: is that more embarrassing than continuing to say you won an election two years after you lost that election? [ laughter ] man, did his parents do a number on him, i don't know what happened there. [ laughter ] some of the more disturbing

moments came from the video footage of chuck schumer, steny hoyer, and nancy pelosi hiding from the rioters during the attack. it was like a reboot of "home alone" starring your grandparents. [ laughter ] they were desperately trying to get help from the police and the military, because these lunatics, not only were they threatening violence, they were using the capitol as a bathroom. >> i just got off with the vice president -- >> i got off with the vice president-elect. >> okay, but what we left the conversation with, because he said, he had the impression from mitch that mitch wants to get everybody back to do it there. >> yes. >> i said, we're getting a counter point that is -- that could take a ton to clean up the poo-poo that they're making all over, literally and figuratively in the capitol. >> jimmy: you understand things got so bad, the speaker of the house had to say "poo-poo." [ laughter ] the worst part maybe is they planned this. this is steve bannon, one of trump's right-hand men less than a week before the election,

telling a group of i don't know who in china that this was the plan. >> what trump's going to do is declare victory, right? he's going to declare victory. that doesn't mean he's the winner, he's just going to say he's the winner. the democrats, more of our people vote early that count. theirs vote in may. they're going to have a natural disadvantage and trump's going to take advantage. that's our strategy. he's going to declare himself the winner. when you wake up wednesday morning, it's going to be a firestorm. >> jimmy: and that's exactly what happened. one of other trump's big-mouth looney goons, roger stone, also days before the election, saying this. >> let's just hope we're celebrating. >> yeah. >> i suspect it will be -- i really suspect it will still be up in the air. when that happens, the key thing to do is claim victory. possession is nine-tenths of the law. we won, [ bleep ] you, sorry, it's over, you're wrong, [ bleep ] you. >> yeah, abc. >> [ bleep ] get right to the violence. >> jimmy: there it is, right on tape, it's crazy.

i have to say, all this evidence, it's crazy. it's crazy the only trump being held in prison right now is melania. [ laughter and applause ] at the end of the hearing the bipartisan committee voted unanimously to subpoena donald trump to make him testify before the house. which, unless the house is "of pancakes" that's just not going to happen. [ laughter ] it's like sending a cease and desist to a hurricane. at this point, i don't know what they need to hear from him. it's all there, what they need to hear from him. this case against trump is about as obvious as an episode of "scooby doo." [ laughter ] and yet there are still those who believe all these lifelong republicans who worked for donald trump suddenly made this all up. it's either they all got together and made it up, or he did it. those are your only two choices. here's the thing. if being an american means accepting and abiding by our constitution and after hearing all this, you still think what donald trump did was okay? i guess you're not an american. i think that makes you an illegal. [ cheers and applause ] we know how you feel about

those. so i guess, pack your stuff and make an orderly departure from the country. and this is something with all this going on, this is the email the trump people sent to his supporters last night. with the subject "did you hear?" "donald trump is ranked #1 presidential golfer in history by a landslide." [ laughter ] by a landslide! first of all, no one heard that, okay? and secondly, if it was -- it's like flunking out of school but bragging about how good you are at recess. [ laughter ] but you know the old saying. when the facts are on your side, pound the facts. when the law is on your side, pound the law. and when you have neither of them on your side, pound eleven diet cokes and start an insurrection. [ laughter ] meanwhile, blobby jones has many other investigations to worry about. the supreme court today rejected trump's request to intervene in his dispute with the department of justice over those classified documents he absconded to mar-a-lago with.

the court denied trump's request by a unanimous vote. and a new story from the "washington post" says trump was more directly involved with these boxes than we knew. after trump got the subpoena to hand over the records, he personally ordered one of his employees to move the boxes of documents from the storage room at mar-a-lago to his private residence at mar-a-lago. remember how he was ranting and raving about the agents searching barron's bedroom and going through melania's closet? that's because he put the documents there. [ laughter ] the employee originally denied moving the boxes, but changed his story after the feds showed him security video of it happening. [ laughter ] he then admitted that trump told him to do it. trump got caught by his own security. it is astounding how dumb this -- he's such a bad criminal. if donald trump wasn't born rich, he'd be one of those bank robbers who passes the teller a note with his name signed at the bottom. [ laughter ] the video and the confession are major pieces of evidence that mean i think they almost have to indict him. it's crazy. of all of donald trump's many

victims, who in a million years would have thought the national archives would bring -- mr. "forbes" magazine foiled by a bunch of librarians. [ laughter ] it's beautiful, right? he's got the fbi boxes thing, he's got january 6th, he's got a rape case against him, he's got the attorney general in new york, he's got the criminal interference in the election investigation in georgia. but when will this man stop this insanity and leave us alone? >> never, never. never. never, never. never. never, never, never, never. ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever! ever, ever! ever, ever, ever! ever is a long time. >> jimmy: oh, yeah. yeah, it is. [ applause ] feels long. feels very long.

going back to georgia. this is something. even on a day dominated by trump, herschel walker still somehow managed to make news. this time, well -- a month or so ago, he claimed his grandmother is native american. >> i found something out. i found something out. my mom just told me that my mom's grandmother was full blood cherokee. so i'm native american. i'm like, ho, hello! so i'm a supermutt. i don't know what i am. but this is what was so funny. this was what was so funny. i said, mom, why didn't you ever say anything to us? she said, back in my days, a lot of native american were treated worse than blacks. >> jimmy: oh, yeah, that is funny. [ laughter ] hilarious, really, herschel. so if he is a quarter cherokee, i guess that means herschel walker is a dallas cowboy and an indian at the same time. [ laughter ] only problem is, they looked into it, turns out he isn't.

his grandmother is 0% cherokee. neither is he, nor are any of his little papooses with all his many women. maybe trump will start calling him pocoheisman! [ laughter and applause ] while we're on the subject of genetics, this is interesting. according to "harper's" magazine, trump supporters are 50% more likely than biden supporters to have donated sperm. which is fascinating because they found -- research has found that political beliefs may be genetic. which would mean, the maga babies are going to outnumber us. it's a scary possibility for the future, which is why president biden took a break during his trip to l.a. today to encourage democrats to get to work. >> i'm joe biden, and i approve this message. times have changed. this ain't your father's republican party. the maga party's a different breed of cat. and they're not just threatening to take control of congress, they're threatening to take control of our willie milk too. [ laughter ]

republicans are flooding our banks with sperm. and if we're going to beat 'em, we're going to have to beat ourselves. [ laughter ] if you're a male democrat who can still make gravy in your chinos, get on down to your local sperm bank and squiggle your wiggle for america! they got a whole mess of ways to get you in the mood to make trouser male, like hotsy totsy pin-up gals. cat local catalogs of pretty ladies trying on brassieres. susan b. anthony. [ laughter ] mmm-mmm-mmm! what was i talking about again? oh, yeah. if we want to save our country, we're going to need you to pump that pappy pickle. that means you, your friends, even your old pal joe. just like riding a bike. okay, bad example. [ laughter ] come on, jack. jack! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: wow. thank you, mr. president.

all right. the moment you've been waiting for. social media isn't just about fighting over politics, it's also a place where you can go to sling mud at your favorite celebrities. every so often we take a moment to shine a light on the evils of twitter by letting famous people read some of the poisonous comments about them. and we've done it again in an all-new edition of "mean tweets." [ cheers and applause ] >> brian cox looks like a super gruff, sophisticated ball sac. >> i would hate having a convo with chris rock. he is one loud-ass black individual. this person is a psychic. >> matthew broderick can eat a [ bleep ], he peaked at 17. >> kevin bacon is what ryan reynolds would look like if he did a [ bleep ] ton of heroin. >> idris elba is ugly. there, i said it.

[ bleep ] you. >> they should cast me in all of dan levy's parts because i'm annoying and gay but not completely insufferable, and i'm also hotter than him. nothing says "gay rights" like this tweet. >> kirsten dunst looks like if jewell got cosmetic surgery and got hit by a bus the day they removed the bandages. thank you. >> andrew garfield has fast people hands. or at least hands of creepy school custodians. that is untrue. and incredibly inventive and creative. >> also, jason momoa is a creep. no one should feel anything in their ovaries for him. [ bleep ] you. >> i hope that fat [ bleep ] george clooney is selling [ bleep ] loads of tequila right now. i am. >> why is salma hayek trending? is her titties out?

no. >> jon stewart sucks. china [ bleep ]. come on. china doesn't have a [ bleep ]. you're thinking of florida. [ laughter ] >> why does halle berry's knee look like the face of that guy that came out of the book that harry found in a restricted section at the library at hogwarts? you need to stop looking at my knees. the show is up here, from here to here. >> the worst part about "curb your enthusiasm" is they portray larry as [ bleep ]. no one wants to [ bleep ] larry david. you know what? couldn't agree more. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: we've got a great show for you tonight -- we have music from omar apollo. and we'll be right back with george clooney and julia roberts. [ cheers and applause ] ♪

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[ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: hi, there. tonight, he is apple music's up next artist. you can see him at the austin city limits festival this weekend. his album is called "ivory," omar apollo from the mercedes eq stage. [ cheers and applause ] well, i'm not going to waste any time. our guests tonight are two of the biggest movie stars on the planet. combined, their movies have grossed more than $11 billion dollars and they're going for 12 in their fifth movie together. "ticket to paradise" opens in theaters a week from tomorrow, please welcome george clooney and julia roberts. [ cheers and applause ]

♪ [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: how are you doing? >> hey! >> jimmy: thanks for -- i assume you know each other? >> just met backstage. >> jimmy: how well do you really know each other? do you know each other's middle names? >> oh. >> that's a good question. >> timothy. >> oh, yeah, she does. [ laughter ] she knows me better than i -- >> i'll give you a hint. >> rose. >> no, starts with an "f." [ laughter ] >> i have to be careful. >> you should be. >> frances? >> no. >> i really thought you would know that. >> i'm sorry. >> jimmy: you really came out with that timothy so quickly, that's amazing. with myself.m kind of impressed-

god knows i'm a little talked out. >> jimmy: what about george's birthday? >> may -- >> oh. oh. 1913. [ laughter ] >> 7th? >> may 6th. >> jimmy: very close. >> when's my birthday? >> no idea. [ laughter and applause ] i don't remember my own birthday, so in fairness. >> my birthday's coming up. >> it is? >> yes. >> oh, well. i'll do something. >> jimmy: better do something. >> yeah. >> it's the 28th of october. >> oh, sure, i was going to say that. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: do you recall, maybe you don't remember, but when do you remember becoming aware of each other in a professional sense? >> oh, i do know this. >> it was the baths, i think. what was it? what was it professionally? >> the first time that i was swooning over george clooney -- >> sure. >> was -- could be first and

last time. >> yeah. [ laughter ] >> was on the tv show "sisters." >> jimmy: on "sisters." >> yes. selma ward's boyfriend, falconer. >> wow, falconer. >> jimmy: wow, falconer. >> and i actually auditioned for "mystic pizza." >> didn't get it. [ laughter ] >> oh, she was in -- i had my eye on her then. >> jimmy: i don't know if you know this, you had your big breaks at the same time. look at this. march 1990, "pretty woman" came out. you became obviously a huge star. >> thank you. [ cheers and applause ] >> i know what you're going to do. >> oh-oh. >> i know what you're going to do. >> oh, no. oh, no. >> jimmy: do you really? >> i'll tell you that right now. >> i'm going to tell you why. this is a small town, my friend. a buddy called and said, "a friend of mine who did a show with you needed to get a clearance." so go ahead. >> jimmy: okay, yeah, we looked for a clip. >> come on. >> jimmy: one month later, after

"pretty woman," george hit the airwaves in a big way. >> big-time. >> jimmy: right here on abc. >> yeah. >> jimmy: with a show called "sunset beats." >> yep. ♪ ♪ >> what's the matter? >> it's no good. [ cheers and applause ] >> yep. >> jimmy: always a perfectionist. >> it's no good, man. >> jimmy: all that hair like a cocker spaniel. [ laughter ] >> a lot of zest. >> kind of like a cocker spaniel. >> jimmy: i became obsessed with this show after hearing about it today. i looked it up. >> did you binge it? >> jimmy: i wish i could. it's unfortunately not streaming. >> oh, no. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that was an undercover cop. >> undercover cop on a harley during the day, a rock star at night. >> jimmy: a rock star at night. >> wow, dreams do come true. >> seven episodes. >> only seven?

>> seven and they shut us down, i don't know why. >> jimmy: i also learned they canceled it after two, then four years later or something, they put the other episodes on. >> jimmy: i think they were like, "oh, crap, george is a big star, we better put these on tv." >> smart they saved those. >> jimmy: when was the first time you meet each other for real? >> the first time we met was for "ocean's eleven." >> jimmy: the whole set was in vegas. that's quite a place to bond in las vegas together. >> well, i mean, we bonded before that. >> we did. >> we met, we had a couple of meetings beforehand. >> but we became -- not to speak for you, george. >> speak for me. >> i will. we became instant friends. >> yeah. >> you know, you just meet people and sometimes you think, i really don't like that person. i have no reason to not like them. >> yes. >> i just don't like them, i will never change my mind. and then there's some people -- >> jimmy: like timothy over here. >> my gtc, who you go, okay, i may know this person till the end of time. >> jimmy: yeah. >> that's nice. >> jimmy: that's nice.

that was quite a -- [ applause ] that movie was brad pitt, casey affleck. >> matt damon. >> jimmy: who? i don't know who that is. [ laughter ] >> matt damon. >> jimmy: matt who? >> matt damon? >> jimmy: he was in that movie? >> d-a-m-o-n, middle name edward. [ applause ] >> jimmy: wow. >> wow. you made that up? you did? she made it up. it's total bull [ bleep ]. >> jimmy: no, he's got a dumb middle name, as i remember. i don't remember exactly what it is. will somebody look that up? a ridiculous middle name. >> somebody look it up. could somebody get on that, please? >> somebody in the audience. >> jimmy: he was in it. >> don cheadle. >> jimmy: don cheadle. matt damon's middle name is paige. >> oh. it makes me love him even more. >> yeah. >> jimmy: come on, now. >> paige is the name of my best friend, paige. >> paige, sure, yeah. >> jimmy: matt damon said this. matt paige damon said about

george, gambling, "he's the unluckiest guy at a table by far, i sat there and watched him lose 25 straight hands of blackjack in a row. [ laughter ] >> it's true. unlucky or just stupid. [ laughter ] >> well, at least you're unlucky at something. >> yeah, exactly. >> i would say you're doing pretty good at everything else. >> julia, all of us were in -- we stayed at -- the bellagio, i think. >> bellagio, gorgeous hotel. they didn't know what hit them. >> literally like a bunch of 8-year-olds got in. >> yes. rebels run the palace. it was terrible. >> my pal richard, who you know, is an actor. very funny. richard came to visit. >> yes. >> we stayed in these rooms at the bottom of the casino. we didn't have a -- we had a roll-away bed. >> for richard. >> for richard. we were all up drinking and talking. pitt was there. pretty boy damon was there. all that. richard falls asleep on his roll-away bed. >> whilst we're all chatting. >> we're talking. >> we're having a little cocktail party around him and his cot. >> we take the cot and wheel it up into the middle of the casino and leave him there.

[ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: come on, for real? >> yeah, they did. >> jimmy: oh, that's fantastic. >> old ladies with that thing, "what the hell?" [ laughter ] >> jimmy: george clooney and julia roberts are with us. their movie is called "ticket to paradise." we'll be right back. colitis pe. put it in check with rinvoq, a once-daily pill. when uc got unpredictable,... i got rapid symptom relief with rinvoq. check. when uc held me back... i got lasting, steroid-free remission with rinvoq. check. and when uc got the upper hand... rinvoq helped visibly repair the colon lining. check. rapid symptom relief. lasting, steroid-free remission. and a chance to visibly repair the colon lining. check. check. and check. rinvoq can lower your ability to fight infections, including tb. serious infections and blood clots, some fatal; cancers, including lymphoma and skin cancer; death, heart attack, stroke, and tears in the stomach or intestines occurred.

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tell her the wedding is off, bring her home. >> whenever we say "don't" to lily she hears "do." i say we go in 100% there for her and always just supportive and loving, and that's how we trick her into dumping mr. seaweed. >> it's interesting, i'm thinking about a trojan horse sort of thing. make her think we're okay with the wedding, once we're in, get her to end it herself. >> that's literally what i just said. >> i don't remember anything about a trojan horse. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that is george clooney and julia roberts. here they are in real life. the movie is called "ticket to paradise." a very funny premise.

you guys play a divorced couple, you hate each other. i imagine that's fun to play. >> well, i hate him. i think he's still secretly in love with me but that's a different -- >> she spends a lot of time swooning over me. >> he's like, god, i love her so much, what can i do to get her back? >> couldn't have enough of me, she kept chasing me around a lot. [ laughter ] at some point she just gave in. >> you know that emoji that has hearts? always like -- >> really? >> or the cartoon, the tongue rolls out -- >> sure, that's exactly what she did. [ laughter and applause ] >> and that's the film. >> jimmy: that was very enjoyable to watch, by the way. >> thanksgiving with our families is really fun. >> oh, yeah. >> jimmy: you shot in australia. i know it's set in bali. you shot in australia. beautiful, obviously. >> beautiful. >> jimmy: you jump in with dolphins. were those real dolphins?

>> no, fake dolphins. >> i was wondering how you train dolphins to act with you. >> did you see "flipper"? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah, but they're doing weird things to flipper, let's be honest. >> peanut butter all over. >> jimmy: flipper was maybe under the influence of a dart or something like that, i think. >> do you think? i loved that show. >> sure. ak-ak-ak! [ laughter ] >> jimmy: they went through 14 flippers the first season. dead, dead, dead, dead -- >> okay, let's go back to the movie, i don't want to know this. >> you can't eat a good flipper all at once. >> oh! don't encourage him. do not encourage him. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: and george -- >> yes. >> jimmy: you take your shirt off, and you're in -- >> yes. >> jimmy: -- remarkably good shape. [ cheers ] >> yes, get your tickets. he takes his shirt off, and later -- >> later, what? what? >> what did she say? >> jimmy: what is your general body hair situation? [ laughter ]

really what i'm getting at -- >> did i wax before? >> jimmy: did you wax before it? >> i have a person who comes in and just shaves the back, shaves the shoulders. >> jimmy: do you have a groomer, someone who grooms you? >> no, i don't have a groomer, no. that would be kind of weird. >> jimmy: you just went for -- that was -- >> why am i in the middle? [ laughter ] i just don't -- i'm not comfortable. >> she's just mad because -- >> no! >> her back -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: it was as smooth as a dolphin. really. [ laughter ] >> god! >> jimmy: julia, does george leave you out of his pranks? i know that some people -- >> leave me out? excuse me. did you recall in the list of cast members of "ocean's eleven," i'm the only girl. >> jimmy: yeah? >> i was like -- p>> jimmy: tha? >> like shooting fish in a barrel, i would fall for everything. >> jimmy: interesting. i would think that maybe you would be exempt. >> wait a minute. >> no, no, no, no. >> she'd crawl down the hallway,

put plastic over the toilet seats. >> cellophane on the toilets, classic. here's the key, ladies and gentlemen. >> grown woman. [ laughter ] >> okay, i was less grown then. you have to either dim the lights or unscrew the lightbulbs. because they come in and turn on a bright hotel light, it will shine off the cellophane. >> jimmy: that's a great tip. >> and ruin the joke. >> yeah. >> jimmy: that's a really good tip. >> yeah. >> it takes a little extra time, but it's worth it. [ laughter ] >> also depends if you're doing 1 or 2, you know what i'm saying. >> jimmy: uh-huh, yeah. [ laughter ] then you've got leftovers, yeah. >> yeah. that leaves a whole mess. >> jimmy: lucas bravo was here. >> isn't he great? >> jimmy: he seemed lovely, yes. >> he's not really french. >> jimmy: he's super french and you kiss him in the movie. >> on his first day. >> jimmy: i was tickled by this. he said something to the effect of, george, i'm sure you get a lot of, "george, he's a prankster, i'm going to get him." it's a terrible idea.

>> it's a fool's errand, i think. >> jimmy: yes, it opens the door to horrors. >> yes, yes. >> jimmy: so he told me about this prank. and then showed me a picture of his prank. >> yeah. >> poor lamb. it was a mild disaster. >> jimmy: this was his prank. >> yep. >> jimmy: he dressed up like batman. [ laughter ] >> classic batman, original batman. >> jimmy: adam west batman. >> i'm dressed as i'm not sure what. >> jimmy: that's his prank on you. >> yeah. [ laughter ] >> yeah, it does beg the question, who's getting the last laugh? >> jimmy: yeah. >> he got it. >> jimmy: he's worried you're going to get him back for this. >> i will. i don't have to, right? done. >> your work is done. >> my work is done. [ applause ] >> jimmy: you're still one up. >> you have to understand, jimmy and i are a team. he'll send me stationery of people's names. you sent me brad pitt's stationery. i send letters to people from brad pitt. [ laughter ] horrible letters. i mean, i saw meryl streep the other night, sent her a letter

years ago with a bunch of cds that were dialect coach. i sent it from brad. a bunch of cds to meryl streep. said, "this guy helped me with my accent in "troy," i thought maybe he could help you." [ laughter and applause ] meryl said she avoided brad for like five years. [ laughter ] >> yeah. >> he sent me gold embossed, maybe we'll get in trouble -- >> jimmy: maybe, possibly, yeah. >> should i say it? >> jimmy: yeah, go ahead, it's okay, i don't know what they can do now. >> the white house stationery. [ laughter ] of bill clinton. bill clinton's actual stationery. and i send actors all the time letters from bill clinton about how much he loved their movie. [ laughter ] [ applause ] which i guarantee they're hanging up in their homes. [ laughter ] so if anyone's watching, take the picture down, take it down. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: it's a lot of fun.

you can get away with a lot that i can't. you know what we're going to do, if you don't mind, when we come back, we have this little experiment -- >> we going to wax george? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: well -- that sounds fun. you guys have done a lot of movies together. you're obviously very close. >> yeah. >> jimmy: we want to find out if you, julia, can recognize george's face just by touch. >> i don't have to touch his hairy back. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you don't have to touch his back. >> okay. >> my back's not hairy. >> jimmy: a group of men, faces like the lionel rhythmy "hello" video. >> oh. ♪ hello ♪ >> what group of men? >> jimmy: you'll see soon. [ laughter ] julia roberts and george clooney. we'll be right back! wakanda showed us all that nothing is impossible. [ african instruments and vocal chants ] so how will you share your brilliance with the world? keep forging your own path.

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vote yes on prop 31. >> jimmy: omar apollo is on the way. here's a question. how well does julia roberts know her longtime co-star and bff george clooney? we're about to find out, it's time to play "what's his face?" [ cheers and applause ] first let's meet our only contestant. julia roberts, come on down! [ cheers ] there she is. as you can see, julia is blindfolded. being guided by guillermo. don't worry, julia, guillermo is very study. >> okay. >> jimmy: i assume you really

can't see, you're not just pretending? >> i can't see. i'm not -- i -- i can't see. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you've known george, as we've established, over 20 years -- >> shouldn't george be doing this? we've established i know george maybe better than george knows me. >> jimmy: right, right, you're not wrong. next time. [ laughter ] we're going to find out if you can recognize george's face without anything else. >> i don't know where i am in space right now. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: here come our contestants. there they are. five men. [ applause ] of various types. >> okay. >> jimmy: and take as much time as you like. and i'm going to leave you here, julia -- >> i'm not going to put my hand in eyeballs or something, right? >> jimmy: maybe, if you're not careful. if you get jabby. i'm going to lead your hand here to a face. there's a face. feel the ears. we'll see if you talk, then it blows it. so yeah -- everybody be very quiet. >> that's -- okay.

the beard length is good. i don't know about the bridge of the nose, though. >> jimmy: oh, all right, okay. our next person. ♪ >> oh, the music is -- >> jimmy: yes. very. so this is number 2. >> not you. sorry. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: okay. this our next contestant. >> okay. hm. >> jimmy: and here. >> how many contestants are there? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: there are five total. this is number four you're feeling right now. >> okay. wait. you don't have a beard. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: and finally, number five. >> wait. [ laughter ] wait -- i -- is george even out here? [ laughter ]

>> jimmy: and one more. >> okay, there's one more. >> jimmy: over here. number six. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: wow. >> i hope it's you. >> jimmy: you are unbelievable. julia roberts, unbelievable. we have a special prize for you. guillermo? julia, we have a gift for you. and all of our contestants. this is george's new face cream called lotion's eleven, available -- really, only available here, not in stores. thank you, all, for playing this wonderful game. george clooney, julia roberts. their movie is called "ticket to paradise." it opens in theaters one week from today. thank you, guys for being here. [ cheers and applause ] we'll be back with omar apollo.

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need it or not. it is "this week in unnecessary censorship." [ cheers and applause ] >> a jury says conspiracy theorist alex jones should [ bleep ] 965 million [ bleep ]. >> the same woman says that you have a 10-year-old son who you've only [ bleep ] three times. is that true? >> that's not true, i [ bleep ] him a little more than that. >> is it awkward to [ bleep ] your dear, dear friend? >> i could do it now. >> [ bleep ] are gigantic. i had a bruise, you get a bruise here underneath that knuckle, because all day long you're [ bleep ]ing. >> imagine, let's take barack hussein obama. could you imagine if we [ bleep ]ed on his [ bleep ]? >> ryan [ bleep ], he never kisses me on the [ bleep ]. >> i think that's a good thing. >> i'm for ohio. i don't [ bleep ] anyone's ass like him.

ohio needs an ass kicker, not an ass [ bleep ]. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: we'll be right back with omar apollo! >> lou: the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is presented by the "s" class from mercedes-benz.

>> lou: the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is presented by mercedes e-q. all electric, all mercedes. >> jimmy: big thanks to george clooney and julia roberts. apologies to matt damon, we ran out of time for him. "nightline" is next. first, if you have tiktok, you know this one. from his album "ivory," the song is called "evergreen." omar apollo! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ evergreen he controls me was

there something wrong with my body ♪ ♪ am i not what you wanted babe ♪ ♪ if i ever tried if i ever tried i would ♪ ♪ evergreen he tears me to pieces doesn't even have to try ♪ ♪ she don't know you like me she could never love you more more than me ♪

♪ but sometimes i pray that you fall in love i've cried i've ♪ ♪ cried so much for you baby ♪ ♪ evergreen he tears me to pieces doesn't even have to try ♪ ♪ you know you really made me hate myself had to stop before ♪ ♪ i break myself shoulda broke it off to date myself ♪ ♪ you didn't deserve me at all at all at all one last time ♪

♪ i see ever evergreen please don't come home to me ♪ ♪ sweet evergreen he don't love me no more ♪ ♪ he don't love me no more he don't love he don't love me no more ♪ ♪ thank you. [ cheers and applause ]

♪ this is "nightline." >> tonight, hammer attack. house speaker nancy pelosi's husband, paul, severely beaten. >> the suspect pulled a hammer away from mr. pelosi and violently assaulted him with it. >> inside their san francisco home. the suspect allegedly looking for the speaker shouting "where's nancy?" what police saw during the attack. plus the matthew perry exclusive. the friend we loved. riding a wave of stardom fueled by the wildly popular landmark television series "friends." behind the scenes hiding a life-threatening secret. >> i was in a dark room meeting with nothing